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    Age
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    About CarpeNoctem144
    LD Count:
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    Recent Entries

    21/07/15 - LD 38: Lucid dreaming on acid

    by CarpeNoctem144 on 07-15-2021 at 08:35 PM
    To preface this, I have to admit that I didn't really lucid dream on acid. This would probably be even more fascinating, if it wasn't for the inability to sleep while under the influence of such substances. Sorry for the clickbait-ish title - I just had to call it this.

    Anyway, it all started with a long non-lucid dream with the usual mess of changing people, places and storylines. At some point I ended up observing a plot in which a teenage girl dosed her unprepared friend with LSD, who was then having a difficult time... The story ended and it turned out that I had been watching a video on youtube. I proceeded to some music when I suddenly saw myself in a reflecting surface and noticed my own huge pupils. This made me "remember" that I (too?) was on acid (yeah, that's obviously how this usually works *facepalm). I just laid back and enjoyed the effects which mainly consisted of some strange visual phenomena and a pleasurably relaxed, slightly confused headspace.

    At some point I "woke up" and wondered how I could have fallen asleep in the first place and that it was too early to wake up, that I should still be tripping. Nonetheless, I went into the living-room where I found my niece. This seemed even weirder as I knew she was away for holiday. While hugging her I pinched my nose...and could still breath. Now, this seemed to clear things up for me. Gravity disappeared and we both started floating upwards, until we went straight through the ceiling. Suddenly, I was alone again, now floating in a gray mist. I wondered what to do now... While I was perfectly aware of my current dream state, I still took the previous events as waking reality. And so I ended up believing that I was indeed lucid dreaming on acid...

    Under these circumstances I thought that I'd be able to conjure up almost anything - which I normally fail to do. So, I just asked my subconscious to take me to a beautiful place. At first, everything turned dark but I waited patiently (despite questioning if this would work). Then, an intense sensation of being accelerated built up throughout my body. I felt like being shot out of a canon, flying through darkness. Slowly surroundings began to form again. I was flying at breakneck speed along a street with forest on both sides. When I was nearing a bend, I slowed down and finally came to a halt. There it was: A mountain lake shimmering in the sunlight, surrounded by trees of the darkest green and huge mountains to either side. I was in complete awe, both by the sight and that this all was even possible.

    Then, I was accelerated again and taken to another mountain road with a picturesque hotel. The surroundings reminded me of a real place with a huge volcanic crater nearby through which I always wanted to fly in a lucid dream. So, I just went into that direction. When I crossed the ridge, my wish was fulfilled and I could indeed fly through this amazing landscape that almost looked like a canyon. With an euphoric feeling of freedom I navigated through the changing scenery.

    When I came closer to the other end, I started waking up...and slowly realized that it all - also the first part - had been a dream. The whole story made me laugh quite a bit.
    My two take-away messages are: Even if one is lucid enough to be aware of the own dream state, memory and rational thinking can stil be heavily impaired. And, the limitations that I experience in lucid dreaming (and analogous in waking reality) are ultimately only self-imposed.

    21/07/11 - ld 37

    by CarpeNoctem144 on 07-11-2021 at 08:37 PM
    Random lucid after unintentional WBTB. Slept ~6.5 hours, awake for an hour, then fell back asleep...

    The dream started non-lucid, with me walking around some village by the sea. Somehow my awareness was increasing throughout, and at some point rational thought caught up with the knowledge of being in a dream that I already had for some time at this point. I kinda awoke into the dream, now with my waking-life-like consciousness present, inside the brightness of the dream surroundings. The whole scene seemed strangely permeable, I could have just chosen to wake up but I wanted to try and stay. To stabilize I kneed down and engaged my senses. To my right there were people walking along the promenade, in front of me there was something like a sandbox. I let my hands run through the sand and once again, I was astonished how real this mind-made representation can feel. Using my hands as a shovel I picked up some sand and closely examined it. I could see every miniscule stone; most of them being of a white color but some also dark. While I was focused on this stuff immediate in front of me, I realized that the world around me was quite unstable and seemed to change shape all the time. I clenched my left hand and let the sand run down slowly. It seemed that I could feel every single grain of sand leave my hand. By now, the dream was very stable and I was fully aware.

    I went along the promenade and towards the sea. There sat a friend of mine with her son (who seemed to have some kind of disability) playing at the beach. Somehow I, too, had acquired a small child on the way (which I didn't really question - despite my lucidity). I considered what to do now and found that I'd like to go swimming. Though I knew this to be a dream I still felt somewhat responsible for the child and so I asked my friend to keep an eye on him. She agreed and I dove into the water straight away. Reminding myself that this is a dream I continued to swim and breath underwater. It was pretty difficult though because some kind of force was pulling me up and also holding me back. I struggled against it and finally freed myself somewhat. I kept swimming further but at some point the surroundings dissolved and I woke up.
    Categories
    lucid , side notes

    21/06/09 - ld 36

    by CarpeNoctem144 on 06-09-2021 at 07:24 PM
    First entry this year - first proper lucid dream in the last 6 months (well, there also was one last week I may or may not write about later as it was so confusing).

    Slept for about 4 hours, woke up and couldn't fall back asleep for a long time. Set some intention to lucid dream during this as I knew it would increase my chances. When I finally got to sleep again, a confusing mess of dreams ensued...One was a false awakening I didn't recognize. I got up feeling extremely groggy with a very limited control over my actions and emotions. I tried to communicate my strange state to the dream characters a.k.a. my family but words were just as hard to use.
    At some point I woke up again, now with a far clearer head. Everything seemed normal and I was certain of being awake now, but with the memory of the false awakening that just occured I wanted to make absolutely sure with a reality check. So I pinched my nose and took a breath. Wait a moment, this is not how this should work. This means....I'm dreaming still!
    Almost immediately all perceived gravity vanished and I began floating around the house. There were again some family members there but they didn't seem to care about my new form of moving around. Instead they were talking loudly about every-day stuff. I ignored them.
    When I got to a window I simply floated through it. But when I wanted to fly higher there again was the ceiling above me and I was back inside. At first I wanted to leave through the roof now but didn't feel quite sure about that so I chose to use the window again. Suddenly I was back outside. The dream environment was certainly somewhat unstable.
    Anyway, I didn't have a particular plan for this lucid dream and so I just kept flying (far better than walking in my opinion ;) ) to see where it would take me. I made my way through the well-known neighborhood, once again admiring the detail of my mind's creation, also looking for differences to waking reality. Of course there were some, but while in the dream I was quite oblivious to these.
    Then, I got to a forest and reassessed what I wanted to do. I found a path getting narrower in the distance and a thought crossed my mind: If I follow this path to its end I'll meet my embodied subconscious there.
    Before I could even set out though, the dream just fell apart and left me wide awake.

    20/11/10 - ld 34

    by CarpeNoctem144 on 11-10-2020 at 04:41 PM
    First true LD in over two months. No techniques used, no intention set, completely random.

    In an ordinary non-lucid dream I somehow gained some awareness of my dream state but couldn't hold onto it. I faded in and out of lucidity and dreaming several times until I laid down and kinda WILDed in the dream - this has worked for me before.
    A brief falling sensation and I 'awoke' on the sofa in my parents' living-room. Instead of doing a physical reality check I reminded myself that I wasn't sleeping in this place. It was pitch black and the dream rather unstable so I kneed down and touched my surroundings. As always, everything felt hyper-realistic but I still couldn't see a thing, so I crawled across the room towards the door.
    Suddenly my parents' cat appeared in the dark (well, for her it wasn't dark...) and attacked my bare arms. I set the rebellious cat aside and finally left through the front door. Outside, it wasn't any brighter, so I went on feeling my way forward.

    As I reached the street suddenly my vision got unlocked and I was standing in bright daylight with detailed surroundings. I wondered what I should do with my lucidity now...and longed for something intense. Flying? Nope, not stable enough. Then I knew...I had to kill my self here (*).
    At the end of the road a woman started her car on the driveway and to the right there was a strange kind of agricultural vehicle with lots of sharp blades. I walked towards the car, staring fearlessly at the woman, wondering if she would fulfil my unspoken wish.
    She looked confused and increasingly insecure, and I understood that I had to take things in my own hands. Without hestitating I ran the last meters and jumped straight into the machine's razor-sharp front.
    No pain but a rush of adrenaline through my body... and I was awake.

    (*) Note for anyone reading: This should be taken metaphorically; I'm not suicidal. Currently going through a major transformation process due to some other experiences so I'm getting quite a few metaphors about dying at the moment.

    20/09/05 - ld 33

    by CarpeNoctem144 on 09-05-2020 at 06:23 PM
    Again, only unintentional WBTB and intention to lucid dream.

    In the following sleep cycle I first got into a non-lucid dream but with ever-increasing awareness. When I reached lucidity I seemingly woke up but immediately recognized the false awakening. Getting up and moving was a little difficult, though also incredibly realistic. I was at my parents' house and slowly walked through the dark deserted rooms. At the front door I used the key to open the door though I'd normally just walk through it - the dream was so vivid and yet unstable that I wasn't sure about passing though objects.
    Outside it was a bright, warm summer day. The trees on the left were incredibly coloful with red and purple fruits, swinging in a gentle breeze. The wind also blew my long hair into my face which had - surprisingly - a dark-red color. I decided to go into the garden because I expected it to differ from reality - which it then did of course. It resembled the gardens of a palace with lots of water areas and a fountain in the middle.
    I thought it would be interesting to drink from the fountain and tried to make a glass appear - didn't work, but whatever. To get to the fountain, I needed to balance on a swimming log. This again felt so incredibly real that I got lost in thoughts about it - and woke up.

    I was still close to dreaming, maybe even in sleep paralysis, and so I just let myself sink back in. Some dreamlets washed over me without letting me enter until one of them opened wider and wider. I got to observe a scene where a black car was chased by the police, driving on a bridge high above the sea. In the car there was a dream character that was me, and a partner. They came to a stop, having trouble with their car. Another police car arrived and barred the way. I was still observing, though maybe influencing the plot, when the 'me' in the car decided to take the only way out - to jump with the car from the bridge.
    I saw the car falling down and into the water. Reminding me that this was just a dream, I took my place down there. Now, I was suddenly swimming underwater. Of course I knew that I could still breath and I did - but every breath was difficult as it was accompanied by a sting of fear.
    In large circles I was diving deeper and deeper until suddenly all water was gone. Otherwise, the surroundings were still the same - now looking like a vast hall. The floor was cluttered with balls and balloons of different colors and sizes. One of them was special: it was filled with what looked like confetti. My partner who had come there with me was trying to cut it open but the material seemed very firm. Someone else told us that there would be knowledge about the universe and about the future in there (okay?!). I took it and pulled (with some difficulty) the plug. Without the chance to do anything else, I woke up.

    This was another good example of the sheer weirdness of dreams and also my first time dreaming lucid in third person perspective, interesting!