New Dream Adventures of Raven Knight

2017, 07-13

Night Raiders

I am outside on a dark and moonless night. I peer into the darkness, using night vision to see what is going on around me. I see a village like one out of a fantasy RPG close by. I also see that there are a number of people sneaking up on the village. The people sneaking up on the village looked like armored warriors. Even as I am thinking that the attack begins. All of the warriors hidden in the dark charge forward, crying out loudly, words I can’t understand. The village doesn’t have any defenses that I see. Sleepy villagers come out to see what is going on and get cut down. I am not going to let this happen. I charge into the open myself, creating a fence from the tendril ability of Alex Mercer to keep the attackers from progressing any farther. They try to cut through the tendrils with their swords but that is ineffective. People are gathering on both sides of my fence now.

There is a lot of commotion going on and soon someone comes forward who appears to be the leader. He asks what the meaning of the holdup is and then sees me. He orders me to remove this strange barrier from his path. I say no, I won’t allow him to attack this village. He identifies himself as Theon Greyjoy and says he’s the prince of somewhere called the Iron Isles. I comment he must not be much of a prince if he finds attacking defenseless villagers to be amusing. He says he doesn’t need to explain himself to the likes of me then orders his soldiers to kill me and remove the barrier. For some reason I am reluctant to kill these people so I decide to scare them instead.

I make a very obvious display of shifting my arms into Alex Mercer claws adding some tendrils reaching out from my body and moving around me and glowing red eyes to give the impression of something demonic. A man attacks me with a sword and I use tendrils to take the sword from his hands and bend it in two, breaking it as if it was a child’s wooden sword. The soldiers are now calling out that I’m a sorceress and a monster and as I advance slowly they are in quite the hurry to retreat. Theon drives his sword through my middle but I feel nothing. I pull it out and melt it down with intense heat from my hands. The wound immediately regenerates. That’s all Theon has to see before he turns and retreats with his soldiers. I call after him that if he comes back he will see the full extent of my powers. Everything fades to black and I wake up.

2017, 04-03

The Battle of Five Armies

I am in a place I don’t recognize. I look around to see if I can get some idea of where I am. The area around me is rather desolate. I see no sign of life, there are very few plants that are even alive. I see no trees except the burned husks that look like they’re left over from a raging forest fire. I walk through the desolate landscape for a bit, wondering what could have happened here. I walk for a short ways and then I hear a voice behind me. This surprises me because I was just there and I didn’t see anyone around me at all. I turn towards the voice and I see a man and a woman standing there. The woman is in a kimono and the man is in blue jeans and a t-shirt. The woman smiles at me and tells me to do a reality check. I look at her for a minute, for some reason my mind doesn’t want to wrap itself around that concept. But finally I do a reality check by pinching my nose, and I find I can still breathe. So this is a dream! I look between the woman and the man, Asuka and MoSh, wondering what to do now. I don’t remember what goals I am supposed to accomplish…

My thoughts are interrupted by the sounds of a battle not far off. I hear the clashing of steel, people yelling… I look in the direction of the sound but I can’t see very far due to a ridge. Asuka says something about training different techniques of fighting, but the first thing she had done was to bring MoSh here to see me. When I hear her mention fighting I comment that I hear a lot of fighting just over that ridge. Without giving much thought to anything else I head in the direction I hear fighting from. I look down into a valley below and I see total chaos. There is a large battle going on down there that appears to involve humans, dwarves, elves, trolls, orcs, and zombies, at least those are what I can see from where I am. I see a small group of dwarves have become separated from their main force and are quickly being closed in on by orcs. I have to help them!

Without thinking any more about MoSh and Asuka I head down into the valley, making a straight path towards the cornered dwarves. As I am approaching the battle I transform my right arm into an Alex Mercer blade and my left into an Alex Mercer shield and then I head into the battle. I immediately find myself under attack by orcs and zombies, but their attacks fail to break through the Alex Mercer shield. And the Alex Mercer blade cuts an orc or zombie down with ease, though I make sure to keep moving so I don’t get completely surrounded to the point where I am unable to make it to the dwarves in need. I can’t see where I am going any longer, so I just do my best to keep traveling in a straight line until I finally break through a wave of orcs and then I see dwarves in front of me. A dwarf attacks me at first, seeing the design of the shield and assuming I am fighting with the orcs. I move the shield enough for them to see I am a human and tell them I am on their side, here to help them reunite with their kin to make a united force against the enemy. They stop attacking me and one of them says he saw Dáin’s forces not far to the side. So all together, six dwarves and me, we fight our way into the throng of orcs and zombies until we reach the main force of dwarves.

Now I stop and think about MoSh and Asuka… I just took off and left them! I wonder where they ended up? Did they come down and get involved in the fight, or did they stay out of it? I head back in the direction where I saw them last and once again I am surrounded by orcs and zombies attacking me. Some of them are slain before they can get close to me because the main force of humans is trying to sandwich the orcs and zombies between themselves and the dwarves. Elves are on a hill nearby and they are picking enemies off from a distance with their bows and arrows. I get near the edge of the battle and I see where there are some wounded people lying there. I have found Asuka, she is tending to them. I see she is giving people what look like cookies! I get there and ask where MoSh went. She said he is out there practicing some of his fighting. She asks if I have been wounded, because she has cookies that will heal me. I don’t need healing… but I still want a cookie. So I take a cookie and look around, trying to find MoSh.

As I turn away I see MoSh is in plain sight on top of a hill at the far side of the battlefield. He looks like Ranma Saotome now, and he is fighting a man who is wearing black robes and wields a black staff. The man he is fighting uses his staff to fire purple rays of dark energy at some fallen humans and orcs on the ground near the base of the hill, and they stand up, returned to a semblance of life as zombies. I head in that direction, wanting to help out. That means I charge back into the fray, and I get immediately attacked from all sides. I swing my arm blade in wide swipes, slicing open any orc or zombie that comes in my path. A troll stomps into my path, barring my way from reaching MoSh and the man he’s fighting. The troll stomps up to me and swings his huge club weapon down on top of me. I crouch down and block with my shield. The shield holds, but I am pushed a couple feet into the ground. The troll seems confused as to why I didn’t go splat. He swings his club to try again. This time I jump up and onto the club, which is wide enough to run along. I run along the club and run my arm blade right through the troll’s neck. Blood spurts everywhere, all over me, I am grossed out, but the troll falls over dead. I look back towards the hill where MoSh was fighting, standing on top of the fallen troll to get a better view. I see him on top of the hill, but now he is holding the man’s staff and has used it as a spear to drive it through his enemy. I can see when the man dies, and at the same instant every zombie in the field drop dead. This leaves the orcs severely outnumbered without the dead assisting them. I turn to face orcs that are now charging at me, but everything fades to black as I wake up.

2017, 03-27

Ambush at the Ford

I am outside on a road that runs through a thick forest. It is a very beautiful forest, and the day is a pleasant one. I don’t really think much about how I came to be here, I just walk down the road at a leisurely pace. As I am walking down the road I notice that it is starting to get darker. At first I am thinking it has merely reached the end of the day, and the sun is setting. I walk for a while before I reach an area clear enough that I can see the sun in the sky, and I see it is still high up and shining brightly. But for some reason the light of the sun doesn’t seem to be reaching the ground. It’s as if there is some large invisible barrier keeping much of the light away, as well as much of the warmth. The air around me is growing colder as I proceed. I think this is really strange, but I don’t let it stop me. I am now being pulled forward by a feeling I need to get somewhere quickly, before it is too late.

After walking for a short while I hear the flow of water up ahead. I hurry along and reach an area that is more open as it approaches a river. The river flows over the road, but it looks like this is a river ford, a place where the water is shallow and I could wade across if I need to. I notice that in spite of the road coming into the open air, the darkness is deepening rather than dissipating. I look up and I see the sun, but much of the light is not making it to the ground. I hear the sound of someone approaching and I look. I see a man approaching me, watching me suspiciously. He asks who I am and where am I going. I don’t exactly know the answer to where am I going, so I decide to give my name, Raven Knight, and I say I’m going wherever this road may lead me. I think he is about to ask another question when he looks alarmed and turns to look back down the road. He then says if I am not in league with the enemy then I had better get out of sight.

I am still wondering what enemy he is referring to when I hear a couple cries of alarm. A couple of small people, I immediately think they are hobbits, come from a spot by the side of the road that they had apparently thought to be hidden. I hear another voice back there warning someone to stay away from his master or… or… he trails of, apparently not sure how to finish that threat. Aragorn starts in that direction, one of the hobbits says the dark riders have come upon them from behind! I immediately know that is where I need to be. I run as fast as I can, right past Aragorn and to the place the two hobbits came out of. Sure enough, there is a dark cloaked figure on a black horse towering over a hobbit who is lying on the ground looking injured. A second hobbit is standing between the fallen hobbit and the towering dark rider, holding a sword, and shaking with fear, but unwilling to abandon his friend. I hurry forward, calling out to get the monster’s attention. I don’t think it’s working, but then I am finally able to get between the dark rider and the fallen hobbot, who I am now assuming is Frodo. The protective one muct be Sam. I tell Sam he had better get Frodo out of here, Aragorn is out on the road and will help. Sam looks like he wants to ask questions but instead he helps Frodo up and they make very slow progress out towards Aragorn. Aragorn is out there saying we have to get to the ford, the dark riders won’t cross. I form my right arm into an Alex Mercer blade, and I charge it with light energy. When he sees this, the dark rider backs off a bit then turns and leaves. I have a feeling he is not retreating.

I head back out onto the road thinking I can help the hobbits and Aragorn. They are making their way towards the river ford, Aragorn is calling out, asking where the pony went off to… then says it’s no matter, the pony could never outrun the dark riders. The dark riders are approaching the ford, I see five of them coming from down the road. Aragorn says there is no choice, he will have to fight them to delay them while the hobbits escape. The hobbits clearly think this idea is insane, there’s no way Aragorn can face the riders alone. I come out and say he will not be facing them alone. In fact, he should help the hobbits get away, in case the rest of the riders ambush them as they try to escape. Aragorn says he doesn’t know who I am, but… he trails off as he sees my right arm transformed into a glowing white blade, then seems unsure of what to say except something about me being a witch. I tell him no, I’m no witch, but the dark riders cannot face this light energy.

But before anyone can consider escape it is too late, there are now five of the dark riders on one side of us and another four dark riders between us and the river ford. There is no choice but to fight. Aragorn pulls out a sword to fight, so I use Battery by Metallica to call a bolt of lightning and charge his sword with light energy. I still have my Alex Mercer blade arm charged with light energy. Now I focus on the song Old Friend by Disturbed as I attack the dark riders with my glowing blade. “Hear me now, feel my blade! There is no more time for apologies! Malevolent emotions take hold of me! Are you ready to begin your trip to the other side? Death is an old friend of mine! Aragorn and I attack the dark riders, and the fact we are attacking them with light energy has clearly taken them by surprise. Their demonic horses rear up in fear of the light. But I’m not interested in the horses, I’m after the wraith riding on the horse’s back! I jump up and swipe with my blade, splitting the black robes in half and eliciting a horrible shriek. I hear another shriek from the one Aragorn attacks. Then I hear one of them laughing.

I turn and Aragorn turns at the same time and one of the ring wraiths has snuck up from behind on foot and is holding Frodo by a foot. He is laughing manically, and says we have lost. I tell him not to count his rings before they’re won. He seems in a mood to gloat rather than take his prize and run, and he says if we even try to approach him we will get Frodo back piece by piece. I feign that I am striking the ground in frustration… and I unleash Alex Mercer tendrils into the ground. The tendrils, also charged with light energy like my blade, erupt right underneath the ring wraith holding Frodo. They blast right through the ring wraith, eliciting another horrible shriek. The ring wraith disappears into nothing more than a black robe, dropping Frodo. One of the tendrils gently wraps around Frodo and lowers him safely to the ground before I withdraw them. Upon seeing that, the other ring wraiths flee.

Aragorn looks at me strangely, but is more concerned about Frodo. We both go over to check on Frodo. He definitely is not looking well, it seems being in such close proximity to the ring wraith has only accelerated his sickness. He is phasing between solid and semi-transparant right now, and he looks to be in pain. I transform my blade back to normal and then focus on the song Voices from the Macross Plus soundtrack to use it as a healing song. Golden energy gathers around Frodo, and at the same time I notice that the sunshine is once again reaching the ground. The healing energy flows into Frodo, and he immediately looks better. He opens his eyes, and is no longer phasing in and out. He remains solid now. He is looking at me strangely as I finish the song. He says something about me being a fair elf maiden. I say no, I am no elf maiden, just a healer doing what I can to help. I tell Aragorn that I sense there is still a piece of the evil blade inside Frodo, but Elrond of Rivendell has the skill to heal that. I don’t try to remove it myself, because even now I feel I am about to wake up. Aragorn still wants to know who I am. I tell him if there is need, I will be back, and maybe we can talk more then. Everything fades to black and I wake up.

10/20/14

Note: It has been a long time since I have posted a dream. I have been having some serious issues with depression and I have been unable to remember most of my dreams and mostly not cared about the ones I have remembered. I think I am breaking out of the darkness of depression now and I will try to post dreams more often again.

Fall Into Darkness
I am somewhere I don’t recognize, but I don’t really care about that. I feel awful. I hurt inside, my depression is giving me serious problems right now. I don’t really notice anything going on around me, just the pain inside. I finally pull myself to my feet and I look around. The room I’m in looks abandoned. It looks like whoever had been here left in a bit of chaos. It looks like it used to be an office of some kind but now it is trashed. There is some broken computer equipment lying by a desk that is almost broken in half, papers are strewn everywhere, and none of the lights are working, leaving the room only illuminated by a street light outside the window. I don’t pay too much attention to the setting, however, I walk over to the window and look out.

The window has been broken and I am able to step right out onto the ledge. I see there is a city outside, but there aren’t many lights on even though it is night time. I look down and see I am a long way up in what must be a skyscraper. There are people way down there, though there is something odd about the way they’re moving. Because of how I am feeling, however, I don’t pay too much attention to the people down below. I am just hurting so much inside. I know things will never get any better. I’m no good to anyone, and I’m no good to myself, there is only one way to escape such pain. So with absolutely no hope in my broken and dying heart I step off of the ledge and feel myself falling into the comforting embrace of death…

But no… that doesn’t happen. I fall for a bit and then I feel I am being lifted back up into the air. It feels almost like flying, which is an exhilarating feeling compared to the crushing depression I felt just seconds before. I notice that someone has put their arms around me. Someone has snatched me right out of the air, taking me into a strong and comforting embrace… and we are flying! Or it certainly feels like flying… maybe it was just a really high jump because the next thing I notice is that my rescuer and I land safely on the roof of a building next to the one I jumped from. My rescuer sets me down and now I am able to turn around and see who it is. I turn around and find myself staring directly into the blue eyes of Alex Mercer from Prototype.

From the look in his eyes it appears Alex is a mix of concerned and annoyed. He asks what I was thinking when I did something that foolish, do I want to die? I tell him that was the general idea. I tell him there really is no reason for me to continue. He looks at me for a bit longer and then asks if I even realize that I’m dreaming. He says he knows I can’t really die in a dream, but do I really want to? I stop for a bit and look at him, trying to comprehend the idea that I am just dreaming now. The pain inside has faded a lot now that I am here with Alex. He takes me into his arms and says he would love for me to be able to come to the dream state permanently so we could be together more, but not like that. He said he only wants that to happen when it is my time, he doesn’t want to see my life end like that, there is still too much that I can do in my current home world. I tell him there isn’t any hope. I tell him I can’t do it alone. I can’t face all that is against me all alone. He said I am never really alone, he is right here with me. And so is Altaïr… and Hetfield… and everyone else that is in my inner world. And even in the physical world I have my friends and my mom. I tell him that everything just feels so hopeless. He said he can help me with that… and he’ll no longer take ‘no’ for an answer. He pulls me back into his arms and holds me there, it feels comforting. I don’t even realize that he’s actually consuming me until everything around me fades to black and then I wake up feeling at peace.

01/16/14
Out of the Shadows
I am in a strange place. I look around to see where I am. I am immediately lucid and I am just wondering where I am and what I might be doing there. I survey the area. It is a very unpleasant place, it looks like a dark and backwards version of a normal forest. Trees are large and leafless, they look dead. The sky is a dreary gray that casts the landscape into a permanent state of twilight. The land is also shrouded in a thin mist. I start walking through the trees, not really sure where I'm going, but I need to figure out why I am here. There are strange things moving in the misty shadows that I can't quite see. I look behind me and I realize I am not alone. There is a man there with me. I have to get a bit closer to him before I can see who he is, but I recognize him as soon as I'm close enough to see. Alex Mercer follows me through the bleak landscape. He asks if I have seen any sign of Dana. I tell him he is the first one I have seen here. I didn't even know I was there looking for Dana. I ask if I am looking for Dana then why has he come, I thought he wasn't speaking to her. He says no, he's not speaking to her. But there's a big difference between not speaking to her and letting some freak from a parallel dimension kill her. He says we should find her.

I turn to head off in the direction that feels right. Alex follows me and then he pauses. He says he thinks it will be easier if Dana doesn't even realize it is him. He changes form into Dante from the Devil May Cry series of video games. He says he is ready now. So the two of us continue searching through the mysterious place. After a bit longer of a search I hear a commotion in the distance. Alex has clearly heard it, too. A scream… and some cursing. A woman is screaming and yelling expletives at someone. Alex says that sounds like Dana. We both follow the sound. We find that between two particularly large trees there is an even larger spider web. About the center of the spider web there is a woman tangled up in it. She is struggling to get free, but her attempts just seem to be getting her even more hopelessly entangled. She drops some more loud expletives before calling to no one in particular to help her get loose. I can recognize from here that it is Dana Mercer, Alex's sister. She doesn't seem to have noticed that Alex and I are there, and of course she wouldn't recognize Alex even if she had noticed us. She struggles some more and then finally seems to give up on that at least for now. She looks down and sees Alex and me. She says she is so glad to see friendly faces… please help her get free. Alex gives her a dirty look and says no one has said we are friendly… maybe he's not friendly at all. I elbow Alex and tell him to cut it out, calling him Dante. I tell her we'll have her free in just a bit.

While Dana's struggles haven't attracted any of the local inhabitants to help her they have attracted the owner of the web. A large spider crawls out onto the web from a tree. The spider has the tail of a scorpion and is about the size of a Great Dane dog. When the spider gets closer to Dana she screams again. The spider is about to drive its stinger tail right into Dana's abdomen when Alex reacts. He yells at the spider thing to get the fuck away from her and calls it a few creative things. He may look like Dante, but he is using Alex Mercer abilities as he jumps up into the air and forms his arms into a claws, cutting through the web between the spider thing and Dana. The spider turns to attack Alex. Alex grabs the thing's stinger as it is about to impale him with it. He rips the stinger right off of the spider creature and then consumes the spider thing. I am thinking if he was trying to keep her from knowing who he is then he hasn't done a very good job hiding it. I climb up into the trees in a more normal manner and cut her free from the webs, lowering both of us safely to the ground. It turns out she has a number of injuries on her that I go ahead and use healing energy on. Dana is soon fully healed.

Dana doesn't seem to be paying much attention to me, however, she is looking at Alex. When he comes over near us she addresses him as Alex, though she does so in a questioning way. "Alex?" Alex gives her a bit of a dirty look and says no, it's Dante. Dante Sparda. As if it's an afterthought he transforms his claw arms back to normal human arms. Dana seems puzzled and says he's clearly infected. Alex says he's not infected with anything. He just happens to be part demon. His father was a demon… so if she has a problem with that, then fuck her. Dana points out the obvious and says Alex is clearly still upset. Alex says so he's tired of people assuming the worst about him just because he's a demon. It seems that Dana doesn't really have any doubt that she is speaking to Alex. She asks how she was supposed to know there was a fake running around. It seems Alex, on the other hand, has gotten a bit better at faking being Dante. He asks a fake what? A fake demon? She says a fake him, calling him Alex. "A fake YOU, Alex!" He repeats his name is Dante. She says she knows he's Alex, so cut the crap. He is annoyed, maybe at her for seeing it or maybe at himself for not hiding it better. He says forget it. He can't be Alex… Alex is dead. And then before anything else can be said he disappears through a portal.

Damn it! Dana looks around and curses loudly. It seems she's forgotten I'm even here because she calls after Alex asking how she's supposed to get out of this nightmare. I ask if I'm a pile of chopped liver… I can open portals, too, you know. She looks over at me as if noticing me for the first time and says sorry, she was a bit distracted. Thanks for helping her out. She adds that she has no idea what is wrong with Alex… or maybe he really told me his name is Dante? No… I knew it's Alex, though he could definitely use work on his undercover skills… She asks me if I know what his problem is. I find I'm not happy about the way she has behaved, either… it seems to me that she abandoned Alex in the second game, so I find myself quoting song lyrics… "And I watched as you turned away, you don't remember, but I do… you never even tried." Dana thinks I am being weird, but finally asks tried what. I say to figure out what was going on when she thought Alex had gone completely around the bend. I comment that I guess I can't speak for anyone else, but if someone I care about goes bat-shit crazy for no apparent reason I'm going to do whatever I can to find out what happened and get that person back. She asks who says she didn't try. I tell her Alex. And the clone, too… because when Alex consumed the clone he got all those memories, as well. So I remember when she said, "I understand that I had a brother once; a boy named Alex, a boy who used to play games with me and go skating with me and watch scary movies with me. I understand that Alex is dead now." The only problem with that was he wasn't dead… he was right there just wanting her to hear him out, but no… Now even I have that memory etched in my mind and it never even happened to me, but after being consumed by Alex repeatedly all of his memories are mine… and mine are his… Dana looks at me strangely when I say I have been consumed by Alex repeatedly, that no doubt sounds pretty crazy.

Ok, well I figure I will be waking up soon so I open a portal leading back to Dana's home world. I tell her that is the way home, so she might want to consider not taking any more unplanned excursions into parallel dimensions in the future. She looks at the portal and says no. I say that's good, because unless you know what you're doing you can end up a lot of places that make this place… which I have determined to be some part of the Shadow Realm… seem like a fantastic vacation opportunity. So take care. Dana says no again. No what? She says she isn't going home. She wants to see Alex. I tell her it's pretty obvious to me that Alex doesn't want to see her, so the answer to that one would be no. She asks if I know where Alex is. I say I don't specifically know where he is at this very second, but I know where to find him, where he will eventually come back to, or at least I hope he doesn't decide not to come back… She says she doesn't see why he should be mad at her, she's the one who thought he had turned against everyone he cared about! I tell her that there is part of the problem. Until he knows that you get the gravity of what you did when you told him he is dead, he will never, ever, ever be anything but the picture of pain you saw before. Sorry, but there's no way he will be able to heal until you get it. My Penticon chip projects a hologram of a Simpsons clip… the one where Laura Powers, a girl Bart had a crush, on rips out his heart and throws it in the trash. "You won't be needing this!" It's a short clip and it plays on a loop. Well, look at that… because that's what you did! I find myself getting upset at Dana, and I force myself to calm down… after all, it wasn't me that she did it to… but still, betraying someone I care for is the same as betraying me and I want to call her a backstabbing bitch… But I say nothing. I finally tell her if she ever gave a shit about Alex, leave him alone now. If he gets to a point where he is ready to talk to her, he will find her. I transform the portal to Dana's home world from a regular portal to a vortex portal. The portal creates a vacuum and pulls Dana through it and into her home dimension. As Dana is pulled through the portal I hear her saying she never meant to… but then her voice is cut off as the portal closes. It doesn't really matter what she said, I still plan on continuing to heal Alex… he needs to let go of the past not for Dana, but for himself. One does not forgive others for them, one needs to forgive others for themselves. That is the thought in my mind when I wake.

12/16/13

A Fool and His Grenade Launcher
It is dark outside. I am leaning up against an old broken down car. I realize I have fallen asleep. That's not good since I am supposed to be on watch. The city we're in is teaming with zombies and strange mutant creatures that would kill us without hesitation. My boyfriend Josh is lying in a sleeping bag right near me sleeping peacefully. I am completely non-lucid and unaware of my waking life. My name is Isabell. I watch Josh as he sleeps. I wonder if I should tell him the full truth about what I am, what is inside of me. No. I can't. He would leave me alone. Alone and cold, I can't face the idea of being left alone.

I hear a sound from the other side of the car. I peek out of our hiding place. The moonlight is enough to reveal there is a man standing in the street beyond our hiding place. I am even able to identify who it is. It's Alex Mercer. Josh and I have actually been making a point of staying in the relative vicinity of Alex Mercer. He tends to keep the number of zombies and mutants in the area to a minimum, and if he has noticed us staying near him, he has ignored us. I sit back down, I figure this doesn't require me to bother Josh. Alex will surely continue to not notice us or ignore us. But it seems my movements have awakened Josh anyhow. He sits up and looks at me he asks what is up. I tell him it's nothing. I just heard something and it is Alex Mercer. He still has two more hours before his turn. He lies back down and I lean back against the wrecked car, gazing at the stars. The sky is clear, the only sounds are the quiet movements of Alex out in the street.

I jump a little when Josh suddenly sits up. He says he has it! I ask what. I don't really want to hear his answer. Usually when he says that when he has a notably stupid idea. Of course I can't really complain since it was one of these stupid ideas for him to come with me when the Outsiders had started hunting me. I wish he was back home and safe, though that would mean I would be alone now and I desperately need Josh to keep my heart safe. Without Josh I would be nothing more than a... no... I'm not going to think about that. Josh says he has a great idea. I ask what. He says we'll get rich and then get some really secluded place to stay hidden, a safe and comfortable place. I tell him good luck with that. He looks through the window of the wrecked car towards where I saw Alex. He says Alex will make us rich. I tell him to go back to sleep... he's clearly not thinking straight. He says Blackwatch has offered a huge reward to whoever can kill Alex Mercer. I face palm. I tell him sure, just sit there and give Alex a dirty look for a while until Alex dies of boredom. Now go back to sleep.

I look back to the stars again, not paying attention to Josh rummaging in a pile of stuff we've collected. He pulls out a grenade launcher. He says he has this covered. Get the reward, set up a defendable hideaway with everything we could need. He says he will be able to provide a better life for me then, when we don't have to keep moving and running from the Outsiders. Now I'm a bit alarmed. I tell him to put that thing down, adding that he must be crazy. He says no, I saw what it did to that mutant... the grenade penetrated the mutant's armor and exploded on the inside, tearing the thing apart. I tell him to put that thing away now, I'll not have him running off on some suicide mission. Besides, it's safer with Alex around... as long as no one does something stupid and pisses him off. Something stupid like firing a grenade at him. Josh says it will work. He starts to go around the car and into the open. I grab him and pull him back. I tell him to not try it. Seriously. Don't do it. He looks into my eye for a bit and then goes back to his sleeping bag. He says if I feel that strongly, he'll think of something else. He sets the weapon on the pile of stuff and lies back down. I watch him for a bit longer. He shifts uneasily and then gets up again. He says he has to take a piss. He sounds annoyed at me. Oh, well. Better he be annoyed than have him run off and get killed by Alex Mercer. He disappears between two buildings to do his business behind a dumpster.

I look back to the sky. All is quiet. But Josh is taking too long... could something have happened? Zombies or mutants this close to Alex? It would be unexpected, but not impossible. I am about to follow him into the alley. I ready my energy. I am loathe to use it, dark energy. I hate the way it makes me feel, and it adversely affects the area. But if Josh needs me to use it to save him, I will. I start towards the alley when there is an explosion behind me, out in the street where I saw Alex. A Blackwatch attack? They're always trying to blow Alex up, always failing. I peek out into the street. Now it is silent. Blackwatch has never tried just one attack... Something inside of me feels cold, it's dread.

I look from my hiding place and see what I feared. Josh is out in the street waving at me. He yells at me that I should have believed in him. Alex Mercer is history. He comes towards me slowly. The moonlight reveals his I-told-you-so grin. There is movement behind him. I look beyond Josh and I see something surprising. Alex Mercer is in two pieces! His top half is about three feet from his bottom half. Then there's more movement. The two halves are moving, coming slowly together. I motion to Josh to hurry. He goes even slower, spreading his arms out like he's some kind of victorious hero. I point at Alex, who is now merging back into one piece. He looks and seems to freeze for a bit, unable to believe what he's seeing. I motion to him to hurry. He starts running towards me. He's too far away! He circled around a building to sneak past me and my objections. But he is almost here! He has almost reached our hiding place when a taloned tendril pierces his chest. I have a split second to see the stunned look on his face before he gets pulled back the other direction. Pulled back to a seriously pissed off Alex Mercer. I have no choice but to use the dark energy to get him back. I call on the energy, I feel it rising inside me. I stand up to get Josh back... but he's already gone. Alex has already consumed him. But so fast?

I drop back out of sight, collapsing to the ground beside the wrecked car. The dark energy subsides, replaced by an icy coldness. It's so cold. Josh is gone... why did he have to be such a fucking idiot?! Why couldn't he have just listened to me?! What the fuck was he thinking?! Blackwatch has hit Alex with volleys of missiles and grenades and rockets and it has done nothing! What is one stupid explosive going to do?! I'll tell you what it'll do! It'll PISS HIM OFF! It'll just piss him off... Damn it, Josh... you IDIOT! I'm not really angry at Alex... what else would be expected after Josh... that damn idiot... had literally blasted Alex into two pieces? Of course Alex is going to fight back. Nothing else would be logical. Why did Josh have to be so stupid? I am angry at Josh for leaving me to go on what he should've known was a suicide mission. He was really all I had. What would I do without him? My mind continues like that, I find I am crying. I am relieved that I still can cry. The darkness wouldn't take over immediately. Maybe it won't. Maybe I can resist it. Maybe I can...

I am distracted from my thoughts by movement right in front of me. I look up and see Alex is standing right in front of me, looking down at me. Shit... I curse at myself. I was so caught up with Josh being gone that I had forgotten something really important. When Alex consumes someone he gets the memories of the person he consumed. Josh knew where I was hiding... so of course Alex would know that now. I had needed to depart from the hiding place immediately and disappear into the night. Easily done in the night, but I hadn't moved an inch. And now it's too late. Well, at least I don't have to worry about the darkness consuming me, Alex will take care of that... I just lean back against the wrecked car, close my eyes, and wait. I don't really care what happens. Not a good sign. I find myself hoping Alex will hurry up and kill me before darkness fills my heart. Then I will never have to feel the cold. But nothing happens. I open my eyes and he is still there looking at me. Um... what happened? Is the darkness somehow visible and making me look like an oddity? Now I am just staring back at him. The moonlight is reflecting off of his eyes in a hypnotic way. Just look at those eyes... I shake my head quickly... what the fuck am I thinking?!

I am clearing my head when Alex finally does something. He puts his arms around me and lifts me up. I wonder what he is doing. I keep my eyes closed, but I feel us moving quickly, sometimes it feels like flying. This goes on for a short while and then it seems we are inside someplace. We go through a couple more doors and then Alex carefully lies me down on what feels like a bed. This is very confusing. He would know I was with Josh, so why am I still alive? I hear Alex speaking. He says since Josh isn't here to watch me he had brought me someplace that should be safe from the infected. Infected? Does he mean zombies and mutants? They had seemed like monsters. I'd never considered maybe they were sick or infected with something... Alex says he knows I tried to keep Josh from attacking, and he had assumed Josh was Blackwatch. Josh wasn't Blackwatch... though he had been dumb enough to think they would honor their reward even if he had succeeded. So Alex doesn't plan on killing me after all. It's cold, and I shiver. My sleeping bag is back at the hiding place. I feel Alex lie down beside me, close to me. Close enough that I feel his body heat. I feel him put his arms around me... all six of them?! No... four of those "arms" are tendrils, but those are warm, too. I am feeling warmer. I want to ask Alex why he seems to be helping me after what happened with Josh. But I am also very tired. Before I can manage to ask I fall asleep, a nice and peaceful sleep, and wake up in bed.

12/11/13

A Father's Death
I wake up lying in a comfortable bed that I know right away is not my own. I am Amelia. The first thought that returns to my mind is my father turning his back on me, not caring if I live or die. I bury my head in the pillow wishing I could just fall back asleep and maybe next time I wake up all of this will be just a bad dream. I am getting close to falling asleep when I hear someone enter the room with me. A man beside the bed whispers my name quietly. "Amelia? Amelia, wake up… we have to go." Go? Go where? And who was in my room? I open my eyes and look at the man beside my bed. It's Alex Mercer. Alex Mercer! For just an instant I am alarmed and I sit up quickly, wondering if there is any quick path to escape. But then the sleep clears out of my mind. I have nothing to fear from Alex. He has made it very clear he has no interest in hurting me. And he certainly wouldn't hurt me after I helped him get the formula for the serum he needed to cure his sister Dana. He steps back a bit and says he's sorry he startled me. He says Dana is awake, so he wants to go to the hospital and see her. He says it's not safe for me to stay here alone, there has been too much activity among the infected here recently. So he wants to take me with him. For some reason his show of concern for my safety makes me want to go give him a big hug. It's not really something I am accustomed to… my sorry excuse for a father sure hadn't showed any concern for my safety…

I get out of bed and follow Alex back into the room with the computers. I ask if the infected would really come into the apartment. He points at the hole and says that's where a supreme hunter grabbed Dana right out of her computer chair and took her to Elizabeth Greene for who-knows-what malevolent purpose. He'd gotten Dana back before Greene had finished what she was doing, but that was why Dana had needed the serum. He crouches down so I can get on his back and ride piggy-back again. This time I hold on as tight as I can without him saying anything. And then he is off like a flash, into the air, over buildings, up walls, then he glides in for a landing in an alley behind a hospital. He sets me down and motions for me to follow him inside. I look around. I don't see any sign of infected around there, but I follow Alex anyway. I follow him through several halls and we finally get to a room. The room looks disturbingly like a morgue… I see a sign on the door that says that's exactly what it is. For an instant I am afraid Dana died after all, but no… Alex had said she is awake. I follow Alex into the room and close the door behind me.

In the morgue I see there are a couple dead bodies on tables. I make a point of ignoring those. Alex is with two other people talking. One of the two people is a black man in doctor's garb, and the other is a red-haired woman dressed casually, though her clothes are a bit dirty and ripped. That must be Dana. Alex motions to me to come over where he introduces me to the other two. The doctor is Dr. Ragland, one of the few people Alex feels he can trust, and the woman is Dana Mercer, which I had already guessed. Alex introduces me to them as Amelia, and says I'm the one that managed to get the formula for the serum. Dr. Ragland tells me I did a great thing, that formula saved Dana's life. I force a smile at them, though I don't feel like smiling. I can still hear my father's voice in my mind saying I am of no use to him. Kill her, eat her, fuck her… I don't care… I try to push the voice from my mind before I start crying. Alex asks if I am ok. I lie to him and say I am fine. I'm sure he doesn't want to hear about my problems.

As Alex, Dana, and Dr. Ragland are talking I just kind of move away from them. I feel uncomfortable and out of place. I feel like I don't belong there. So since no one has noticed me move away from the group I continue and leave the morgue. I find my way to the front of the hospital and look outside. There are people out there, regular people, uninfected people. None of them seem alarmed about anything, so I reason it must be relatively safe here. I go outside into the sun. It feels nice. I look around at the people walking and talking and I realize I have never felt so alone. I just walk to the stairs that lead to the front door of the hospital where I sit down, not sure where to go, not sure what to do. I spend a short time crying silently, which no one seems to notice. Or maybe just no one cares. My tears finally dry up but I still don't know where to go so I stay there.

I am still sitting there when a uniformed soldier approaches me, looking at me like he is seeing a ghost. He asks if I am Amelia. I say yes. He is stunned beyond belief. He says everyone at the base is certain I must be dead. He helps me to my feet. He continues talking. He asks how I managed to get away from Mercer. He says that ever since Mercer broke his end of the deal by refusing to release me, everyone had assumed he had probably consumed me to see if I knew anything about… I interrupt him. I ask him exactly what he thinks happened that night. He says an arrangement was made to trade some serum to Mercer for my safe return. The serum had been delivered, but Mercer had refused to let me go, and had instead taken me with him when he left. He said people had searched… I interrupt him again. The serum was delivered? No way! That bastard that calls himself my father had flat out refused to hand over the serum, he'd flat out refused to even consider it! I am so upset that I am on the verge of tears again, but this time there is a fair amount of anger mixed with my grief. That bastard is making himself out to be a victim! I tell the soldier that Alex never did anything to hurt me, in fact he had let me go. My story is not quite true, rather I snuck away while Alex had been talking to Dana and Dr. Ragland, but I have no doubt in my mind he would have let me go even if he had seen me leaving. The soldier doesn't seem to know what to say. He asks if Mercer really let me go, but doesn't wait for an answer. He said we should get back to the base, then leads me to his vehicle and we leave.

I actually have thoughts that I don't want to go back to the base. There's nothing there for me. But I don't say anything, and we drive in through the heavy gates that protect the entrance. I get out of the vehicle and walk towards the residence section. And there he is. The bastard that claims to be my father. The bastard that refused to trade a failed experiment for my safe return. That bastard… He comes over to me with his arms spread wide, saying over and over how happy he is to see that I am ok. He says he's been afraid he would never see me again. He keeps talking and I walk right over to him. Without a moment's hesitation I pull my right fist back and punch him in the face as hard as I can. SMACK! I hurt my hand when I do that. I also feel my father's nose bend unnaturally to the side. Blood spurts from the nose and all over my hand. I start yelling at him, letting the anger out. "A failed experiment? You were willing to give me up for a FAILED EXPERIMENT?! YOU ASSHOLE! YOU ROTTEN PIECE OF SHIT!"

My father takes a towel from a man who hands it to him. He holds the towel to his nose to stem the bleeding. He has the nerve to be getting mad at me. He says I shouldn't talk about what I don't understand. He says he had everything under control until Mercer grabbed me and left. I ask what part of his plan involved riddling my body with bullets as his thugs tried to shoot Alex. He says they are good enough with their weapons, they weren't going to hit me. He hesitates, then asks me how I know what serum Mercer had been after. I tell him Alex pointed out which one he needed… when I hacked into his computer. I speak plenty loud enough so anyone in the area can hear that he has what is no doubt an unauthorized copy of classified information on his personal computer. He asks if I want to get him in trouble. I say the answer is the same as his answer to, "Do you want to watch your daughter die?" He repeats that he had everything under control. He asks how I could hand classified information over to Mercer. I ask him how he was so willing to turn ME over to Alex? He says I shouldn't talk to my father like that. I tell him I'm not. My father is dead. He hesitates, not seeming to know what to say. Neither does anyone else. The room is dead silent. I tell the man who once was my father that he is nothing to me now. He is shit.

I turn and walk away from the asshole. He grabs my arm. I feel like kicking him in the balls. He says I can't just walk away, I aided and abetted the enemy. He wants to know where Mercer is right now, what he is up to, where he took me, how I managed to escape. I tell him I have no idea where Alex is right now, I can't say where he took me because it was not through a route I am used to traveling, and I didn't escape… he let me go. He asks where I last saw Mercer. I tell him I wouldn't tell him where Alex was if Alex was sneaking up right behind him! He glares at me and then speaks to a man beside him. He says I was picked up by the hospital, and that is too far away for me to have gotten on foot. So Mercer must have taken me there. Go there and make sure Mercer doesn't leave there alive! Level the entire area if you have to, but don't let Mercer escape! Someone asks what about the civilians seeking medical help there. The asshole says they don't matter, all of them are infected and just haven't shown symptoms yet. They're already dead! I tell the thing that claims to be my father that he is the absolute lowest form of life I have ever seen. The reports are all right… there is a monster running around the city. But it's not Alex, it's him. He tells one of the soldiers to escort me to my quarters and make sure I stay there. In my current state of mind I might run off and warn Mercer.

One of the soldiers takes my arm gently and uncertainly. He is clearly not comfortable with the situation. He leads me from the room. He stops once we're out of sight. His name is Steve. He says I know my father better than he does… would he really kill everyone in that hospital just on the slim chance they might be able to take Mercer with it? I tell him I would have said 'no' just last week, but now I would have to say 'yes' definitely. He says someone has to warn the hospital so they can evacuate the patients. We go into a room with some computers. He tries to open communications to the hospital but all communications are shut down. He curses, then says all the computers are on lock down since a hacker was detected… He says he will have to go to the hospital. He says I should go to my quarters where it's safe. I tell him I don't think that's safe considering how crazy my father is acting and that he seems to think I have teamed up with Alex.

Steve hesitates, then says I can go with him. We hurry to the area where the vehicles are parked and get into a Jeep and take off out the door. Speeding down the empty streets makes the trip go pretty fast, but it still seems to take forever. Questions go through my mind. How long will it take to organize a massive attack on the hospital? Is Alex still there? How about Dana? Dr. Ragland is surely still there… We finally arrive at the hospital and Steve jumps right out and runs inside. I am right behind him. While he heads for security, however, I head for the morgue. I run all the way there and I am rather winded when I get there. I go inside and find it is empty. No one is there. I'm not sure if that's good or bad. I go into the next room, which is a lab. Dana is in there sleeping on a couch. Dr. Ragland and Alex are facing the other way and talking. I am trying to catch my breath. Alex looks over and sees me there. He asks where I went off to. I tell him that's a long story, but Blackwatch is attacking the hospital any minute now, so he'll want to get Dana and Dr. Ragland out of there. Alex changes form into a soldier and leaves the room.

I follow Alex back to the front of the hospital. I can already hear helicopters in the distance approaching. And the engines of tanks. It's too late to evacuate… Alex asks Steve what is going on. Steve says the commander has gone mad… he's going to bomb the shit out of the hospital. He said we need to get as many people out as possible. Alex says there isn't time. He runs out towards the approaching enemies. I see several helicopters in the air, but I can't see the ground forces yet. Then I see Alex launch into the sky right in the middle of the group of helicopters. He explodes in a huge mass of what look like tendrils (tendril barrage devastator) that punch right through the choppers as if they are paper. The choppers explode and Alex drops back to the ground. Steve looks at me in shock… he says that other soldier was Alex Mercer! He looks around and exclaims that he was face-to-face with Alex Mercer and he's still alive! I am too far away to see any details, but I hear a lot of explosions and I can tell there is a big fight going on out there. That goes on for a while longer and then everything goes silent. Smoke is rising out there, everyone waits to see if anyone emerges.

A single soldier finally emerges from the smoke and destruction. A single soldier that does not even look injured. He gets a bit closer and looks around the area. Everyone has stopped whatever they were doing to watch what was happening. Some civilians are coming from the general direction of the smoke. They all have different descriptions of what they saw. There is only one thing that everyone agrees on. A huge Blackwatch attack force had been closing in on the hospital for unknown reasons when Alex Mercer had single handedly put a stop to the attack. The single soldier comes over near me. Steve backs away from the single soldier, who I have no doubt is Alex. The conversations around me are all about Blackwatch attacking a civilian hospital and Alex Mercer defending it, it seems a lot of people are expressing disbelief about that happening but none are really denying it. The conversation shifts to Blackwatch lying and Blackwatch cover-ups. Alex asks if I am ok. I say I am fine.

A jeep drives up to the front of the hospital. I see the asshole who was once my father in it. He gets out and glares right at me. He says he should have known. He looks at Steve and says he is in a lot of trouble. Because of him I got out and warned Mercer, and now Mercer has disappeared again. Steve glances over at Alex but says nothing. My former father turns to me and says even Steve isn't in as much trouble as I am. He says he has never been so ashamed of his own daughter. I remind him that my father is dead, I am no daughter of his. He says I am under arrest. Alex comes over beside me and tells my former father to leave me alone. My former father looks at Alex's name tag and refers to him as Brandon, telling him to mind his own business. Steve asks if my former father really ordered an attack on a civilian hospital. He says this was a rare chance to eliminate Alex Mercer, but thanks to me, the bastard got away. Steve glances at Alex again but still says nothing. Alex walks right up to my former father and says again to leave me alone. My former father says maybe he should take "Brandon" in with me, and Steve, too, if we all insist on siding with Mercer. Steve says he's not siding with anyone. Alex says my former father won't be ordering any more attacks on civilian targets. The asshole tells Alex he'll order whatever attacks he wants whenever he… Alex interrupts him by consuming him right on the spot.

Alex takes the form of my former father. Steve moves farther away, he pretends to have not noticed anything out of the ordinary. It seems no one else noticed at all, everyone is too occupied by talking amongst themselves. I am just staring. I was so very angry at that asshole who called himself my father… but I'm still not sure what to think of the fact Alex just killed him. In fact, I feel rather light headed. Maybe too much has happened just recently. Too much stress. The world is spinning. There are now three Steves and three Alexes looking at me. I feel like I am falling over. Alex gets closer and catches me before I can fall to the ground. Steve is just watching as Alex catches me before I can fall. He also seems unsure of what to say or do, and he ends up saying and doing nothing. Alex looks around, then back at me… all five of him. Alex says he will get me someplace safe. He says he won't let anything happen to me. He lies me on the back seat of the Jeep and drives away from the hospital, probably to avoid attracting any attention. We are driving along when everything fades to black and I wake up in my own bed.

12/08/13

Night Hero
I am walking home late at night. I am again completely non-lucid. My name is Rebecca. I am walking home from my job at a local diner. I am a waitress there. I really hate my job but I won't be able to get anything better until I finish school. I am in college studying Computer Science. I will soon be a Network Administrator. That will be much better. Right now I am tired and anxious to get home to bed. I had to work late because Gracie, the girl who was supposed to take over after my shift at the 24 hour diner, had been late. An hour late. So I am tired, I am pissed. Some people have no consideration for others.

I am passing an alley that could easily serve as a shortcut to get home. It would cut a good 15 minutes off of my walk. But it is a dark and creepy alley... It looks like bad things could happen there. No... I'm just being paranoid. This is a nice neighborhood. Nothing happens here. I decide I'm sure I can take the shortcut just this once and be safe. I'm 27 years old... I can manage to get home on my own! After briefly considering, I go down the alley at a fast walk. If I hurry I can shave even more than 15 minutes off of my time.

I am about halfway through the alley when I get the feeling I am being watched. I try to brush it off, I'm just being paranoid again. Still, I walk a bit faster. I am just passing an alley that branches off to the left when a dark figure emerges. A rather large and dirty man. He smells bad. He speaks as if he is talking to himself, he says, "Look what we have here!" I go to continue on my way. The man cuts me off and asks where I'm going, the fun has just started. I tell him I'm not interested. He moves faster than I thought he could and grabs my arm roughly. He pulls out a large knife and holds it at my neck. He pushes me down beside a dumpster and then the next thing I know he is on top of me. He is laughing and he smells horrible. He holds the knife at my neck again and says if I resist he'll kill me. He is holding both my wrists in one of his huge hands as he undoes his belt and zipper with the other. I fight to get free but he's too strong and he just laughs. I call for help, but there is no one to hear... no one to help me. I feel cold inside, I am about to get raped and there's nothing I can do about it. I scream and he tells me to shut up or he'll see how loud I can scream with a slit throat. He is ripping my shirt open and my skirt off...

And then he is off me. Someone has grabbed him and pulled him right off me. He curses loudly and grabs his knife as he is grabbed. He turns around and stabs the person that grabbed him. NO! This is worse than getting raped! Someone came to help me and now he might get killed for it! I try to scramble to my feet to do anything I can to keep my rescuer from being killed but I slip and fall back on my butt. My attacker is stabbing my rescuer over and over and over again, cursing loudly. "What the FUCK?! Why aren't you DYING?!" Then I realize my attacker is actually being held almost a foot off of the ground by the man who came to help me. He is stabbing violently and desperately but it doesn't seem to be doing anything. Then something skewers the man. Three razor sharp claws cut through my attacker like paper. The man's cursing changes to pained gurgles. The claws cut the man practically in two. Strange tendrils come from the other man and surround my attacker, ripping into him and literally EATING him until there's nothing left. The would-be rapist lets out some gargled screams as he is being eaten and then goes silent.

There is now just one figure standing over me. And he is not human. He is mostly human in appearance, but both of his hands are taloned claws that are still dripping with my attacker's blood. I realize who it is. I have seen news reports about this, warnings to stay away at all costs. The only sightings of this... man, if he can be called a man, was on the opposite side of New York, but here he is. I find I am looking at Alex Mercer himself, he just killed my would-be rapist, and I am next. I scramble backward, away from him, though I'm sure there is no way I can escape. His claws transform back into hands and he takes a step towards me. I am desperate to escape, I am wishing I could fit under the dumpster... but of course that's impossible. He stops and glares down at me. He looks pissed off. Great... I just met the infamous Alex Mercer and he's in a bad mood. He calls me pathetic and then turns and walks away down the alley my attacker had emerged from.

I stare after Alex, at first I am just shocked that he is leaving me alive. He didn't lay a hand... or claw... on me. That doesn't fit what I've heard at all. The news reports, the warnings, all of them describing Alex Mercer as a psychopathic madman who would happily rip apart and consume anyone he comes across... This doesn't fit at all. Then I start feeling bad. Maybe the news reports and warnings aren't true. And if they aren't, that means Alex just showed up in the nick of time and saved me from being raped and possibly murdered, and I respond like he's some kind of monster. No... I won't let that stand. It's just not right. I get up, pulling my skirt back up quickly. I call after Alex, calling his name. I see him in the alley, silhouetted against the distant street lights. He doesn't respond. I feel the need to not let this go that way. I chase after Alex. As I approach him from behind he suddenly turns, probably because he hears me approaching. As he turns he forms his claws again as if he is expecting an attack. I'm almost to him, and he has his claws spread wide away from his body, so I keep going and put my arms around him, hugging him, thanking him, trying to make up for my strange behavior earlier with a show of gratitude now.

At first it seems Alex doesn't know how to respond. Then finally I feel his arms close around me, and it is his hands rather than his claws that I feel on my back. He finally asks if I am ok, am I hurt? I tell him I'm fine, thanks to him. He lets go of me and pushes me away a couple feet. He asks what happened to me being scared of him? He adds sarcastically that I'd better run away quick before the monster kills me. He still looks annoyed. I put my arms around him again and say I'm not worried about any monster. "You killed the monster back there. He won't hurt anyone ever again." I look into Alex's blue eyes. I am overcome with the thought, "Wow... He's hot! None of those news reports said he kills rapists, saves foolish young women, and he is sooooo hot!" I tell him I want to thank him properly... then I kiss him. He doesn't really respond. Ok, now I just feel awkward.

I want to disappear into a wall or the ground again, but for a totally different reason now. Of course I would be rescued by a hot guy and then make a fool of myself in multiple ways. I take a couple steps away from Alex, calling myself stupid under my breath. I stammer that I'm sorry and turn to run back down the alley. This crazy night can't end soon enough for my liking. As I am running away a strange tendril wraps around me just under my arms like a harness. It lifts me off my feet and pulls me back to Alex. My first thought is, "Oh, shit... I pissed him off!" But I know immediately when I look at him that he is not angry. He is smiling pleasantly. Maybe even amused by my awkwardness.

Alex carefully sets me down in front of him. He says there's nothing I have to be sorry for. And then he kisses me. We kiss for a bit and then separate. After a brief silence Alex says he'll walk me home, make sure nothing else happens to me. I am perfectly happy to have Alex walk me the rest of the way home.

We talk on the way home. It turns out that since the viral outbreak was stopped Alex had been using his abilities to help those in danger. But it seemed whenever he helped someone they always acted like I had initially, like he was some kind of monster. I tell him that's because of the news reports, which I am now seeing are full of lies. He says they're no doubt sponsored by Blackwatch. They haven't given up their obsession to track him down and kill him. But without the virus spreading they have lost their excuse to maintain a military presence in the city. They must be using civilians to try to track him. Making sure they would report him and not even consider trying to talk to him and hear his side of what's happened and is still happening.

We reach my house. I am again embarrassed that am living at home with my mother at my age. But I have an agreement with my mother that I can stay there rent free as long as I am attending classes and keeping my grades up. My job at the diner is enough for other expenses. My mother meets me at the door and is shocked by my appearance. I realize I'd forgotten that my shirt was torn in the attack. She asks what happened to me. Am I ok? She looks suspiciously at Alex and asks who he is. I don't want to tell her I almost got raped, she worries enough about me walking home at night. I tell her I'm fine. I just had a little accident on the way home. Alex here stopped to see that I was ok and walked me home. My mother looks at Alex for a bit and I worry that she'll recognize him as Alex Mercer. I silently curse at myself for calling him Alex instead of making a name up. She just thanks him for seeing me safely home. Alex asks me if I work tomorrow. I say yes. He says if I don't mind, maybe he'll see me later. He smiles and walks away. My mother says he seems nice... I am tired, so I excuse myself to go to bed. I undress and lie down, surprisingly falling asleep almost right away. I wake in my own bed.

12/03/13

A Father's Betrayal
I am standing out in a parking lot at night. I am not myself, and I am completely non-lucid. My name is Amelia. I keep thinking about mistakes I made. I shouldn't have gone outside the safety of the walls of the military base. But I'd just felt so cooped up. I'd longed to feel the ocean breeze instead of smelling the stagnant exhaust of the military vehicles. And the zombie infestation had been cleared from the area. So what could be the danger? I'd forgotten about the biggest threat of all... Alex Mercer. But even if I had thought of that, what interest would he have in a 25 year old college student? I was supposed to be off at school, but I'd gotten stuck here when I had been visiting my father at the time of the outbreak. Yet here I was, in the middle of a parking lot with a strange tendril wrapped around my waist like a tether, waiting for my father's response to Alex's terms for my safe release. Alex just wanted some dumb serum. Of course my father would turn it over, I was the most important thing in his life. Sure, he had been preoccupied with his work lately, but nothing would come between us. Wow... if Alex keeps his word and releases me I will get hell for leaving the base. I'll never hear the end of it. I am mindlessly playing with the tendril on my waist, secure but not uncomfortable, interesting texture, wondering what is taking so long. What if they don't have the serum Alex wants?

Then I hear my father responding, I'm sure not much time has really passed, it just feels like that. My father is saying someone will be right out with the serum... but that's not what he said! Did he just tell Alex to go fuck himself? For a bit there is no response from Alex. My father must have a plan. That must be it. I can tell Alex isn't happy with the response. The tendril around my waist tightens uncomfortably, but only briefly, then it relaxes again like it was just a reaction to Alex being annoyed. Alex asks my father if he really wants to watch his daughter die. My father responds that Alex can do whatever he wants with me. Kill me… eat me… fuck me if that's what he wants. Alex would get nothing from him. He wouldn't turn over last week's shopping list. I am in shock… did my father just say he doesn't care if Alex kills me?

I feel like my knees are about to give out, but before I collapse I feel the tendril around my waist pulling at me, pulling gently, though. Soon I am standing beside Alex. Somewhere in my mind I am thinking he's probably going to kill me now, hoping he will at least make it quick, but the foremost thought in my mind is how could my own father betray me like that. I am silently crying, my knees give out completely, but I don't collapse. Alex is holding me up. The tendril around my waist is withdrawn, now I feel Alex's arms around me. Is he hugging me? No… he must be consuming me, that's how he's going to kill me. But nothing happens. I am crying on Alex Mercer's shoulder. I hear his voice in my ear, but it sounds distant and I don't understand what he is saying. What I do realize is that he is speaking in a comforting tone. Maybe he's not going to hurt me? Then I hear him talking to my father again, saying maybe my father would reconsider when Alex started sending me back to him piece by piece. So much for not hurting me… Immediately after he finishes saying that, however, it's back to the comforting whispers again. I strain to hear what he's saying. He doesn't mean it. He'll keep me safe. He promises. He keeps repeating that while he holds me close. I hear him mutter something about sending my father pieces of a dead body, but that won't hold up if they test DNA. Damn, he'll have to get the serum some other way.

Then my father's voice drowns out Alex's whispers. He repeats that he doesn't give a shit what Alex does to me. He says I am of no use to him. Maybe he thinks if he convinces Alex I am worthless to him that Alex will just release me and go away? That seems like an awfully risky thing to assume… My father is yelling at his own people now. He asks them what they're just standing around for? Mercer is right there in the open! Kill him! There are some voices that aren't loud enough for me to understand what is being said, then my father yelling again. What part of "she is of no use to me" did you not understand?! Open fire! I feel a quick movement as Alex turns away from my father and the base, bending both of us over and standing hunched over me. I look and see a shield has formed on his back that looks a bit like a spiked turtle shell. Bullets are ricocheting off of the shield. There is a lull in the gunfire, they are probably reloading… or preparing larger weapons. Alex is muttering some expletives and I think they are about my father. He tightens his hold on me and tells me to hold on to him as tight as I can. I wrap my arms around behind his neck. He seems to be tensed up as if about to spring, but he says to hold on tighter, as tight as I can manage. So I do, holding on so tightly that I would think it would be hurting him. But he doesn't seem to notice. Then he launches into the air, practically flying up the side of a building as I hear more gunfire and explosions around us. A couple more jumps and we are well out of range of any weapons at the base.

Alex has stopped running and jumping, so I let go of him. I try to pull away from Alex, I really just want to get away from him and find someplace I can be alone. Alex holds on to me. Of course. What had made me think he was going to just let me go? My father had failed to meet his terms… flat out refused to even consider it. I try a bit harder to pull free, but it's clear I won't be able to do it. Alex holds me closer and says to just relax, he's not going to hurt me. He says the things he told my father he would do to me was all talk, trying to shock the bastard into cooperating. It hadn't worked. He says not to worry, though, he is not going to hurt me. He says I had better stick around, though… there have been some zombies moving back into the area, but they won't get anywhere near me as long as he is there. He lets go of me now, and then paces around the roof we are on for a few minutes. He seems to be thinking about something very hard. He stops and looks over at me. I don't like the look on his face. But he quickly looks away, shaking his head and muttering something, I hear him say there has to be another way. He seems very upset about something.

I can't help it any longer and I ask what the serum he wanted is for. He looks over at me as if surprised I'm still there. He then says he needs it to cure his sister Dana. He says without the serum she will die. He goes back to pacing around the roof. Oh… his sister is sick… I guess maybe a lot of people would do whatever it takes to save a loved one. I stand there in silence for a bit. So it looks like both Alex and I will be losing someone we love. Without the serum Dana would die, and I as I feel right now my father is dead to me. I hear his voice in my mind again saying I am of no use to him. I think about it a bit longer and then something occurs to me. My father has always been a bit paranoid that someone would steal or sabotage his work. To prevent that, he has always kept a backup copy of all his data on a hidden hard drive on his home computer. Surely he has the data on the serum Alex needs. I ask Alex if the chemical formula for the serum would be helpful. My father has always said as long as he has the chemical formula, the samples are just extra insurance. Alex stops pacing and looks over at me again. He asks if I have that formula, I see a glimmering of hope in his eyes. I tell him I don't have it, but I can get it. I just need a computer with wireless capability. Alex says he knows a place and comes over to me. He crouches down and says I should get on his back and hold on at tight as I can. I put my arms around his neck and hold on. He is holding onto my legs so I am riding piggy-back. He says to hold on tighter. I hold on a little tighter, but after all I have my arms around his neck… He asks if I am actually concerned about holding on too tight… because if I am, don't be. It would take someone much stronger than me to choke him. Ok… so I hold on as tight as I can, and he launches into the air for what turns out to be a very exhilarating ride.

A short time later Alex lands on top of what looks like an apartment building. There is a hole ripped in the wall of one of the apartments and we go in through there. There are several computers along one wall along with bulletin boards filled with notes and maps. The notes and maps mean nothing to me. I sit down at the computer and turn it on. It boots quickly since it had been in standby mode. Whoever had used it last had left it on when they left. Once online I go to the wireless connection. I wonder at first if I'll be able to access the network. But I needn't have worried, Blackwatch has turned all of New York into a wi-fi zone so they can communicate. And there aren't many civilians left who would know how to access it. Once on the network I have no problems navigating to my father's personal computer. As long as he isn't in the office, he won't notice the computer receive the remote power-on command. And he is surely still on duty. There is a password to get into his computer. I think about it for a bit and then use my mother's name. Access denied. I enter my mother's name and birthday. Access denied. No, he wouldn't make it that easy. So I enter my mother's name backwards and then her birthday. Access granted. Yes! Now to access his hidden drive. Finding the drive is easy, but it has another password. I use the same password… access denied. I guess it couldn't have been that easy. Then I realize it is just looking for a number. I use my mother's birthday. Access denied. Her birthday backwards. Access denied. Shit! It says one more failed attempt results in the system being locked down. Gotta make this one count. I am a bit too aware of Alex looking over my shoulder. Even though he hasn't done anything to hurt me and it doesn't look like he will it makes me uneasy. And I need that password…

I fiddle around on the computer. I find a C# compiler. I fiddle around with code. Too bad I haven't studied code… But I find I know it anyhow! Somehow the information is just there, in my mind, like I've known it all along. (I know programming in my waking life, so that is probably where the knowledge came from.) I write some code quickly to sequentially search through numbers to identify a password. It then compares the number with the password in the database to determine if it is correct without submitting it and counting it as an attempt. I run the program, keeping my fingers crossed that it'll work. After a pause that is too long for my liking the computer finally flashes up the Access granted message. There is a list of directories that I don't understand. Alex points at one that says Batch 250 and says that's the one. I click that and he points at one that says 256b. I click on that and it opens up a list of files containing all sorts of information from the chemical composition of serum 256b to the results of experiments done with serum 256b. There is a final note on the bottom that said 256b was being terminated as a failed experiment. I stare at that word for a bit. Failed. Alex says something but I don't hear what. Right now I am thinking how my own father was willing to give up my life to protect a failed experiment. A fucking FAILED experiment! Alex carefully rolls my chair to the side and pulls another chair up to the computer. He types a quick email to a Dr. Ragland and sends off a couple of the files.

Alex leans back in his chair and sighs. He says he hopes that will allow Dr. Ragland to create an antidote for Dana. I tell him I hope she is ok. An email comes back from Dr. Ragland. It says that the files Alex sent are exactly what he needs, he will create and administer the serum right away. He says he will send another email when she is awake. I look through the broken wall into the night, which is now brightening into dawn. Now that the action of hacking into my dad's computer has passed, I am just depressed again at the way he betrayed me. I slump down in my chair, feeling like crying but no tears actually come. Alex moves his chair closer and says if it means anything, he'd never had any intention of hurting me. It doesn't mean much… I say there's no way my sperm donor could have known that. I don't want to call him my father. He gave up that title when he told Alex to go ahead and kill me. I look over at Alex, right into his blue eyes which look a lot more caring than I would have expected after the horrible things I have heard about him. But it's looking like maybe I can't believe everything I hear, especially from sources such as Blackwatch and Gentek. Alex puts his arms around me and holds me close, trying to comfort me in my depression over my father's betrayal. And it is helping. It feels nice to be held. I somehow feel safe here, and suddenly very tired. I drift off to sleep in Alex's arms and wake up in my own bed.

12/02/13

In Another Life
I am back in high school. I have absolutely no awareness of my waking life or that there is anything out of place. My name is Marcy, and I am sitting near the back of the room in a math class. It's Algebra. I'm not having any problems with it, I am good at math. More importantly, this is my last class of the day. I am anxious to get out of class and get home. I hope I can get out of the school without meeting up with the jerks that I always have problems with. Sarah, Beth, Maria, and Gene. The bell rang and I shove my books and papers into my backpack and hurry out the door. I am almost to the front door of the school when I see the very people I had been hoping to avoid. Sarah is there talking to her friends. I think I can get out of sight without being seen but it is too late. Sarah speaks loudly, saying watch out, it just got fatter in here. I look down at my body. I am moderately overweight, but it really isn't that much. Gene adds that it got uglier in here. Maria adds that it got stupider in here. Beth tries to add something but I can't understand her because she is laughing too hard. I don't want to let them bother me, but they do. It hurts. I feel like crying.

I hurry past them and out the door, figuring if that is it then I should count myself lucky. But that's not it. Sarah comes out first and shoves me to the ground. The others laugh. Gene and Beth grab my backpack from me, it had only been over one shoulder, and they take off with it. I need that! I chase after them, but I am slower since I am a bit fat. Sarah and Maria follow after me laughing and making comments about my bouncing ass. We reach the far fence of the school yard. I am so out of breath. Gene opens the backpack and starts tossing stuff out over the fence saying that it was all garbage. Beth asks Gene how she can touch stuff I have contaminated. As if just realizing that, Gene tosses the backpack over the fence as if it would bite her. Sarah shoves me into the fence and tells me the world would be better off if I went home and killed myself. I clumsily climb the fence to get my things. I fall down the other side, much to the girls' delight. I scrape my knee up, but that's it. I start collecting my things as the girls walk off, still laughing. After I get my things together I sit by the fence, tired, depressed. Why me? Why did everyone hate me? I start crying.

Not much time had passed before I sense someone watching me. I look up and see a man standing over me. He is wearing a hoodie and has very striking blue eyes. Not sure what a grown man would want with a 14 year old girl I move away a bit. He speaks in a friendly tone. He says not to go, he won't hurt me, he just saw me crying and wondered if I was ok. The fact that a complete stranger has shown concern in how I feel sets me off crying all over again. He asks what is wrong. I find his name is Alex. I'm not sure why, but I feel the need to tell him everything. About the girls harassing me here at school, harassing me online when I'm away from school, one time they had gotten physically violent and broken my nose… maybe Sarah is right and I should just kill myself. He listens sympathetically while I talk. He then holds one hand out to me to help me up. My hesitation has gone now, and I accept his help. He pulls me to my feet… but then he won't let go! He smiles in a friendly way, but what he says is not friendly at all. He says he lied when he said he wouldn't hurt me, this is actually going to hurt quite a bit. But it won't last long. And when it is done, those girls will never push me around again. No one will ever push me around again. I kick at him and try to pull away, I scream, but there is no one way out by the fence to hear me and he is much stronger than I am. He is holding my arm with his right hand… and his left hand is gone? His left hand has transformed into the claws of a beast? My first thought is Wolverine from X-Men. I'm being attacked by Wolverine?! I fight harder. Is this guy going to cut me? Yes, he is. He drives his claws into my mid section. A burning pain erupts from the place he stabbed me. He is holding me close now, whispering in my ear. He says again that it won't last long, so just hang on… it will be much better later. No one would ever hurt me again. Of course no one would hurt me! I was dying! Everything started fading to black. I wonder if anyone will miss me. Will anyone care? My mom would… my brother would… but no one at school would. They'd be glad. I am angry that they will get what they want, then I am swallowed by darkness.

I wake up sitting by the fence that goes around my school. My backpack is beside me. The light is fading. Oh, no! I fell asleep! I look at my stomach, but there is no gaping wound. No blood. Wow… that attack must have been a dream. Just a bad dream. I have to get home! I grab my backpack and run for home. I run as far as I can and then I walk fast. I am exhausted when I reach the house. There are police there, and my mother is beside herself with worry. She sees me and runs over and greets me with the biggest hug. But then she is angry. Where have I been? Why didn't I at least call? What happened? She called the police, she thought I'd been kidnapped or worse! I tell her about being harassed by the girls. I leave out the part about crying, she would consider that a weakness. I tell her I had been waiting by the fence for the girls to leave and I must have fallen asleep. I apologize many times. After a while of apologizing and having people check me out everyone decides it was an honest accident. The police leave, telling me to be more careful about where I fall asleep. I was lucky, but things do happen to girls out alone. I eat dinner, which is macaroni and cheese, then the rest of the evening is spent trying to get my homework done. But it's hard… I don't have as much time as usual since I fell asleep and had to explain everything so many times. And I can't shake the memory of the dream. The weirdest thing is I remember climbing the fence and falling and skinning my knee. But my knee isn't marked. No scratch or scrape, not even any dirt. I am unable to get my homework done before bed time. I am tired, so I crawl into bed and fall asleep right away.

My alarm wakes me up what seems like five minutes later. My sleep had been dreamless this time. I drag myself out of bed, eat some honey nut cheerios for breakfast, then I walk to school as usual. All in a haze, also as usual. As I get to school Sarah starts in on me right away. She tells me I forgot to kill myself last night. I try to ignore her. She asks if there is too much fat in the way for me to cut my wrists. I try to ignore her. She follows me down the hall to my locker while throwing out all the insults she can think of. My birth certificate should've been an apology letter from the condom factory. I'm not sure what a condom is. I should do the world a favor and disappear into fat air. They'd launch me into space but no space ship could lift me… and I'd scare the aliens. This continues. I go to my first class. Sarah is in that class so this offers me no escape. History class. I already don't like history, and with Sarah in the class, it's a nightmare. English class is next, and that offers me some reprieve. But Spanish class is the worst. Both Sarah and Beth are in the class, and the teacher doesn't seem to care what they say to me as long as it's in Spanish. Then there's lunch. I always eat alone. I have no friends. But this time I can't manage to eat alone. Sarah and friends are all around me. Sarah takes my peanut butter and jelly sandwich. She takes a bite, then spits it out in my direction before throwing the sandwich in the trash and saying she shouldn't have done that. Now she's infected. She needs an antidote, quick! I escape into my Biology class after being harassed through lunch. Thankfully, Beth and Maria ignore me in my Humanities class. Maybe they've had enough for now. Algebra is a safe class, then it's time to go home.

Again I hope to get out before being spotted by Sarah and her friends, again I fail. When I see them I duck into the girls' bathroom, hoping they didn't see me. I go into one of the stalls. The bathroom is empty and quiet. I hear the door open and someone comes in. My heart sinks when I hear Sarah's voice. She says she knows I'm in there, calling me Fatsy instead of Marcy. About five minutes pass with her standing out there throwing vulgar insults, more vulgar than I normally hear. I figure I should just go past her and leave. I can't stay here all day. So I come out and head for the door. Sarah blocks my way and says not so fast. She says she was being serious about me killing myself. I should do it. Cut the wrists. Warm water would help me bleed out faster. Hanging is an option if I have a rope. Or if my parents have a gun… no, they must not or they would've killed me a long time ago. After being hounded all day I am getting mad. I tell Sarah to get out of the way. She asks who's going to make her. She asks what I'm going to do about it. I think she wants to get into a fight but wants me to start it for some reason. She wants me to throw the first punch. She pushes at me and I briefly lose my balance. Fine… if she wants me to throw the first punch, I will! I punch her in the stomach, hoping to knock the wind out of her. To my stunned horror, my fist actually goes INTO her stomach, spraying blood everywhere. Sarah doubles over and vomits blood. I pull my fist back, I hadn't meant to do that! Really! As I pull my fist back it's like Sarah's insides are somehow caught on it, a stream of bloody tissue flows out of her wound and onto me. I think I might vomit now. The rest of Sarah's body dissolves into a bloody stream and flows onto me. The disgusting mess seems to soak into my body and then it's gone. No blood, no mess, no Sarah. I stand there in shock.

I walk out of the bathroom in a trance, leaving my backpack behind. I walk aimlessly, across the school yard. To the fence where I'd been harassed by Sarah and her friends just the previous day. I reach the fence and drop to my knees, still in shock, not knowing where to go. I try to clear my mind. I have to go home. My mom (and dad?) would be waiting for me… no… not my dad… he's dead… but he's not. My brother Josh would be there, no… it was my sisters Jenna and Sally. Sisters? I didn't have sisters! I try to think clearly, but it's as if I have two sets of conflicting memories in my mind at the same time. One of me, Marcy, and one of Sarah. Sarah, with her timid mother and overbearing father. Overbearing and ABUSIVE! Sarah's memories told me if I was late getting home that would justify a beating… and maybe a nighttime visit. Those horrible nighttime visits… But Sarah is dead now. I killed her. I become stuck on that thought. Sarah is dead and I killed her. But now I know everything about her. She wasn't mean, she was scared. Scared that there was nothing she could control, that everyone could see her weakness, everyone could see she was a victim waiting to be attacked. But if she could prove she was stronger than someone else… like that fat girl Marcy. Damn, she wished she was me. No sign of being beaten at home… Bringing a good lunch every day… Sarah is dead and I killed her.

Guilt overcomes me and I start to cry. Someone jumps the fence but I don't look. He comes over to me, pauses, then acts surprised it is me. He calls me Marcy, then says he has never seen someone figure out how to use that ability on their own before! I look up. It's the man from my dream… Alex… but his hand is normal, not claws. He doesn't look like Wolverine right now, though I am sure Wolverine doesn't have to have his claws out all the time… Anyhow, being attacked isn't really on my mind. I stand up and grab his jacket, saying over and over that Sarah is dead and I killed her. There. I told an adult. Now he would take me to the police. I had to confess, there was no choice. Sarah is dead and I killed her. But he doesn't lead me away. He shakes me until I stop repeating my confession. Tears are still streaming down my face. I look at my right hand that I had somehow used to punch right through Sarah… Alex holds me, trying to comfort me. He says he can explain what is happening. He says I "consumed" Sarah. He says I should now have Sarah's memories, too, and I do have her appearance. The extra set of memories… I say yes, I do… but how? He says that happens when we consume someone. He can do it, too. I start off on a new rant now, telling him Sarah wasn't really bad, it wasn't her fault, she's dead and I killed her… I consumed her… how can I fix it? How can I reverse it? There has to be a way! There just HAS to be a way! He looks like he's not sure what to say to help console me.

Before Alex says anything more, the other three pieces of bad news come over. More insults coming, and there was no way I could handle it right now… no way! But no one says anything mean. Beth asks who my friend is. Maria sees I've been crying and asks if I am ok, but she calls me Sarah. Gene is getting in Alex's face. She asks what he did to Sarah, why did he make her cry. I say Sarah is dead and I killed her. Maria looks genuinely concerned at that. She asks what I'm talking about. Gene goes back at Alex, calling him an asshole and asking again what he'd done to Sarah. Maria leads me away from Alex, saying I need to rest, I need to rest where my bastard father can't hurt me… I should stay over with her tonight. I know right away Sarah's father would say hell no to that and be furious if she did. And when Sarah wasn't there for his nighttime visit, he'd visit Jenna instead. Jenna… only 8 years old… she'd come to Sarah almost a year ago saying father was visiting her sometimes at night. Sarah had advised Jenna not to fight or father would hurt her more. But now I knew what I had to do. I would go home to Sarah's house and break Sarah's number one rule. I would fight back… and that bastard father of Sarah's wouldn't know what hit him.

I ask Maria for a minute of privacy during which I call my own mother and say I am going to a friend's house. She is thrilled that I have a friend. She says to keep my cell phone on. I say I will. Then I tell Maria I have to hurry home. I run most of the way. Sarah's body is that of a cheerleader, and very athletic. I go into the house and find father in a very bad mood. He's drinking again. Perfect. Maybe I can get him to take me to the basement to take my medicine. Then I'll give him his medicine. But he is more focused on mother right now. His dinner wasn't good enough. The house isn't clean enough. He pushes her against the counter while berating her loudly. I tell him to leave mother alone. Mother looks at me as if I've gone mad, so does father. He asks if I want a piece of what he's handing out. Mother tells me to go to my room right now. I say I'm not leaving until this piece of shit that calls himself my father says he's sorry for hurting mother. Mother is shocked to silence, father is now more pissed than shocked, thought the shock still shows in his face. Father asks if I really want to be talking to him like that. Because if I talk like an adult, then I get an adult's medicine. Mother breaks her silence and tells father to leave me alone, I don't know what I'm saying. I tell father I sure do know what I'm saying, and someone ought to kick him in his pathetically small balls so hard they get lodged in his fucking nostrils. Father is pissed. He grabs me roughly by the arm and says it's an adult's medicine for me, then I will never speak to him like that again. Mother pleads with father not to hurt me, but he ignores her and pulls me down into the basement. This is going perfectly.

Down in the dimly lit basement father asks what he should start with. I tell him he should start with begging me not to kill him. He says he doesn't know what has gotten into me, but I have sure gone off the deep end. I don't feel that way at all. I feel strong, like I can take on anyone. And he is weak. He has to pick on those smaller than himself. I spread my arms and tell him to come at me if he wants to die. He says he'll give me my medicine and he can't be sure I'll survive it. He grabs a board and swings it hard into my stomach. I barely feel it. He recoils as if he just smacked a concrete wall with the board. He looks at the board, then at me, then at the board again, clearly puzzled. He swings at me again. I grab the board and take it from him easily. I break it in half as if it was a twig. He steps back in shock, asking me what the fuck I am. I say it's his turn to take his medicine. I close the distance between us with two quick steps and then I repeat what happened with Sarah. I deliberately "consume" this asshole, or that's what Alex had called it. But this time I feel no guilt. Because now I know Jenna will never awaken to his nighttime visits again. Little Sally will never know a single visit. And mother will never have to take her medicine again. I punch my fist right into his gut, which brings about a shocked look of pain on his face. He screams out in pain and terror as I finish "consuming" him.

The sound has brought mother down from upstairs. I look at my hands. I am a man now, I have taken on the form of that asshole. But I don't want to look like him! I want to look like Sarah! I don't want mother to think father killed Sarah. I'm not sure what I do want mother to think… a wave of guilt hits me over Sarah, she shouldn't have died… it was never her fault. As I focus on wanting to look like Sarah I see my hands in front of me shift form. And my perspective drops a couple feet. I am Sarah again. Mother comes down the stairs and stares at me. She asks where father went, she asks if I am ok. I tell her I am ok, father took his medicine. She stops short and asks what I'm trying to say. I feel guilty about Sarah again. I go over to mother and hug her, telling her over and over that I'm sorry, I'm sooooo sorry… I know it will break her heart when Sarah disappears. And Sarah will have to disappear. I can't be both myself and Sarah at the same time. And if I disappear, then my mother will be the one crying. Mother wants to know what I've done. She says whatever it is, she's sure it can't be that bad. I tell her it is, and I can't say what it is… but she will find out soon, and I am sooooo sorry.

Mother wants to hold and comfort me, but I can't take it any longer. I pull away and run back upstairs and out the front door. I run down the street and out of sight even as I hear Sarah's mother behind me calling out. Not that much time has actually passed, and the sun is still shining. But I am in a dark place. I go down an alley to be out of sight and sit down beside a dumpster to cry. I feel some better knowing that Jenna, Sally, and Sarah's mother will no longer be hurt, but I still feel awful about what happened to Sarah. Someone comes up beside me as I am crying. I look up and it's Alex again. He asks if I can change back to Marcy. I think about my normal appearance for a bit and I feel the shift. Alex says I really am a natural. But a natural what? I ignore Alex now and go back to crying. Alex sits down beside me and puts an arm around me. He says to try not to be too hard on myself, what happened with Sarah was an accident. He asks if I really meant to hurt her. I remember wanting to knock the wind out of her, but that was it. Just a belly ache for her. I say no, I hadn't meant to hurt her. He says it was just a terrible accident, and now there was a lot I would have to learn about control so it would never happen again. Control of what? I don't know and I don't really care. I sit there, still crying, with Alex beside me trying to comfort me. I think I fall asleep like that, because then I wake up in bed as Raven again and a full understanding of what had happened in the dream.

11/26/13

Consuming Power
I am in a city I don't recognize. It is night time, and it is quite dark. Even darker than it usually is at night in a city. None of the lights seem to be on. I wonder why I might be here. I start looking around until I hear some people talking. I come around a corner and I see a man moving towards me. I realize the sky is beginning to lighten and I can make out that the man is some kind of military soldier. He has an assault rifle of some kind aimed at me.

He sounds very unfriendly as he tells me to freeze and not move. He demands to know who I am and what I'm doing there. I cooperate, not sure if he is friend or foe, ally or enemy. I give him the name Raven Knight and I say I am not there to cause any trouble. He says I already am causing trouble. I wonder how I am causing a problem, but he doesn't bother with any more questions. He opens fire on me. A spray of bullets hit my upper torso and cause a small tingling sensation. "Oh, shit! You're HIM!" the soldier says before firing a couple grenades and then turning and making a run for it. The grenades explode in my face, but I don't really notice any effect beyond a flash of light and a slight warmth. I see the soldier about to go around a corner and I think it will be bad if he gets a chance to alert the others. I use a tendril to pull him back over. I have the guy right in front of me and he is just begging me to let him go, he is also calling me Mercer… as in Alex Mercer? I don't really want to kill a guy who is begging for his life, so I am about to let go of him when I realize he has been maneuvering his right hand with some kind of gun in it… to fire a large blast right at my chest. The blast punches a hole right through me, but I don't feel a thing. I look down at the hole in my chest just in time to see it seal itself up, completely mending the Assassin's robes I am wearing, leaving no trace I have ever been shot. The man has a look of sheer terror on it now, though he has gone silent. He then starts yelling in my face, calling me a monster and saying there is no way I'm going to get out of this one alive! He thinks they really have a way to kill Alex? I have to know for sure… he already thinks I'm Alex Mercer so I just consume him and then I know everything he knows. They do have a plan to kill Alex, though this guy didn't know what it is, just to meet his commander at a certain time and place. So I'll attend that meeting in his place.

There are four other guys at the meeting and the commander. I know all of the guys as the other people in my squad. The commander holds up a large syringe of some yellow fluid that looks like piss. He says that is the answer to all of our problems. A virus that will completely destroy Alex Mercer. He laughs like he is a bit crazy. From the guy I consumed I know he has been more than a bit obsessed with Alex. He says the virus in the syringe will make the fucker consume himself. He laughs again and then gets serious. He says we only get one chance. If Mercer survives being dosed with this stuff he'll most likely be immune to it. He says someone has to dose Mercer, then when the virus has him weakened, hit the shit with everything we got until there's nothing left! Now… the plan is to distract Mercer, but someone will have to sneak in and dose him. He says the odds are against that person escaping alive, so first he's looking for volunteers. Josh says he is definitely the one. Blake says Josh is about as stealthy as a freight train. I don't say a word. I step out of sight and become invisible. I sneak behind the commander and relieve him of his gun, his backup gun, and his combat knife, using telekinesis to aid me in remaining undetected. I return to the group, becoming visible and saying I should be the one to deliver the virus. The commander asks why it should be me. I show him his guns and his knife, asking if he has lost something. He calls me Barnes and says he never realized I had it in me… the job is mine. He said to go in quickly and try to get out quickly if I can, but if I don't make it, I'll die a hero.

So then we play the waiting game. Waiting for Alex to show himself. This almost bores me into waking up. But then we get notice and depart at once. Alex is facing off against a large number of Blackwatch forces that include tanks and people. He seems pissed about something. He is asking "Where is she?" The commander tells me to do my thing and hands me the syringe of toxin.

I get out of sight and turn invisible. I get closer to Alex without any problem, thinking about the situation. The commander said if he recovers from the toxin he will be immune. That seems like a good idea. And I can make sure it doesn't kill him one way or another. Healing him… letting him consume me… so I get right behind him and drop my invisibility before completing my assigned mission by giving him the toxin. Of course that doesn't go unnoticed. Alex turns and sees me, grabbing me by the neck as quick as a blink. Then the toxin starts having its effect. Alex looks like he is in considerable pain and drops to his knees, though his grip on me doesn't lessen any. I hear what sounds like the commander yelling to fire, hit him with everything! Alex is glaring at me with more hate than I have ever seen in him, he asks what I did to him… but doesn't wait for an answer. I smile and tell him it's show time just before he consumes me. I am familiar with the process of being consumed, though this time it proves to be significantly more uncomfortable, though still not painful since I don't feel pain in dreams. A sensation of something being drained out of me, very uncomfortable. I figure that's because the Alex I know is more careful when he does it, this Alex was pissed. As I become conscious again, now fused with Alex, I hear explosions all around us. I look through Alex's eyes and see there is an energy field around us that is blocking all of the explosions safely away.

Apparently Alex already discovered one of my abilities to make an energy field. I can tell from Alex that the 'she' he had been looking for is Dana, apparently she has been kidnapped by Blackwatch. Kidnapped by the commander I'd been working for. The explosions around us finally subside. The entire area around Alex is now a huge crater with only the spot he is standing remaining unscathed. Alex stands up and looks at the Blackwatch forces all around us, I can tell he is now recovering nicely from the toxin I gave him. He beat it and will only get stronger from here. There had been people cheering all around us, but now they all fall silent. Aside from the sound of engines idling there is total silence. Alex scans the troops on the ground and spots the commander near the front of the group, apparently wanting a front row seat to watch Alex die. The commander is yelling at everyone to kill Alex, but no one seems too keen to try it after what they just witnessed. Some of them do attack, however. Alex makes a straight line for the commander, using his blade to slice through attackers as he goes. He grabs the commander by the neck and drags him up the nearest building and out of sight of the troops. The commander is trying to make a bargain with Alex to trade Dana's location for his own release, but Alex doesn't need him to tell where Dana is… Alex consumes him and immediately knows.

Alex is off like a shot, jumping off the building and gliding to the next one before sprinting along it and jumping again. Just a couple more jumps and glides and I see we are standing outside a large gate entering into a military base. It looks like a pretty strong gate, closed up tight. But apparently it's not strong enough for the new Alex Mercer… he uses another of my dream abilities and opens up with an energy blast like a Final Flash and blasts it right at the gate. The gate holds briefly and then practically vaporizes in a blast. Alex walks through the opening left by the decimated gate.

Most of the people inside are running around like they haven't got a clue what is going on. One man, however, is standing right in the middle of the main entry and facing Alex as if he thinks he might be invincible. The man says he had been hoping to see Alex here. He says he will get to kill both Mercers. Alex stops short… he already killed Dana? The man answers as if Alex had asked the question aloud. He says yes, he killed Dana… and if only Alex had been there to hear her scream. To hear her begging for mercy, to hear her calling out, "Alex! ALEX!" even though there was absolutely nothing Alex could have done to save her. He laughs. I can feel Alex getting very pissed off. I wonder if there is anything this guy can do to harm Alex. He is clearly trying to provoke Alex… And it works. Alex forms his claws and rushes at the guy with the intent to rip him limb from limb. The guy transforms into some weird tentacled thing… with lots of tentacles. Several of the tentacles wrap themselves around Alex, tightly holding him. The man laughs again and said Alex made that way too easy. Alex is the one laughing now, he says that the man should think again. He uses one of my song spells, Battery by Metallica, and hits the guy with a large bolt of lightning. The electricity flows through him, causing him to spaz out and release Alex. He is looking around with an expression that clearly says, "What the FUCK?!" Alex uses another song, Crush 'Em by Megadeth, and the force of a gravity bomb forces the man into the ground, creating a crater as it does so. The man is struggling to his feet when Alex reaches him. Alex says the man is going to wish he had never touched Dana. He consumes the guy, but the process seems to take forever and appears to be extremely painful. When it is finally done I see that he hasn't killed Dana after all, though he had been planning on it. Alex finds out Dana is still alive and heads straight for where they are holding her. An energy blast breaks through the door to the detainment area. He still has his claws formed and uses them to shred several guards into bloody ribbons. We reach the door to the cell Dana is in. Alex just rips it off its hinges and goes inside. Dana is in the back corner of the room, she backs away when she sees Alex with his claws formed. He changes back to his normal human form before approaching Dana. She seems almost unable to believe it's him. "Alex? It's really you? I knew you'd come! They kept saying they'd killed you, but I knew they had to be lying!" So with Dana on his back and holding on tightly Alex returns to the front entrance where there are numerous enemy soldiers aiming weapons at him. He doesn't even mess with them right now, it is more important to get Dana to safety. He launches into the air and flies over all of them, making it out of range before most of them can even fire. He continues running through the city towards a place he believes Dana will be safe in. I never find out where that is, however, I wake up.

11/03/13

Death is Forever
I am in a place I don't recognize. It is dark, but there is light up ahead. I am in a hallway. My eyes adjust to the darkness enough that I can see I am not alone there. Alex Mercer off of Prototype is there with me. I look over at him and see he is looking back at me. I don't know where we are or why we are there, I get the idea he doesn't know, either. I hear voices up ahead. I head to the end of the hall to see who is talking. I peek carefully around the corner and see there are too people in a home office of some kind. It's Dana Mercer and James Heller off of Prototype 2. I wonder why the two of them are together. I listen carefully and I can pick up what they are saying. Heller is saying something about his daughter being kidnapped by Dana's brother. Dana says he is not her brother any longer. I glance over at Alex to see how he is responding. He looks pissed. He shifts form to someone I don't recognize, a blonde man who actually looks quite a bit like Edward Kenway off of Assassin's Creed IV.

I stand there and stare at him briefly before peeking around at Dana and Heller again. Alex is looking around the corner with me, glaring daggers at both of them. I think it's a good thing looks don't kill or they would both be dead right now. Apparently one of us makes a noise that Heller hears because he asks who is there. I figure they will find out we're there sooner or later so I come out into the open and identify myself as Raven Knight. Heller asks who my friend is. Alex doesn't answer, he is still glaring, mostly at Heller. I look over at him and answer the first name that comes to mind… Edward. This is Edward Kenway. Heller stares at both of us for a couple minutes, Dana takes a couple steps towards me. Heller grabs her arm and says not to get to close… we're both infected. When Heller grabs Dana, Alex tells him to get his hands off, practically snarls it. Heller says Alex (calling him Edward) has no business telling him to do anything. Alex says Heller will cooperate if he wants to stay in one piece. I roll my eyes… I see Dana doing the same. Heller wants to know where Alex Mercer is. Alex says Heller had better hope he never finds him. "I… er… he would tear you apart." Dana interrupts and asks me what Edward and I have come here for. Before I can answer Heller is yelling at Alex again, telling him he will destroy Alex Mercer and start out with Edward as a warm-up if he doesn't shut the fuck up. Alex says he should kill Heller right now for just saying that. I take hold of Alex's arm and tell him to calm down. He doesn't seem to be hearing me and pulls his arm away. Heller tells him to go ahead and try it. Alex stops and says no, he won't… that would be too easy. He says he has heard Heller has a daughter.

Heller gets really pissed and says if Edward lays one hand on her he will make him beg for death. Alex says not to worry, he would never hurt the little girl… he's just going to tell her the truth about Heller, about what he has done, about what he has become… before he's done she won't be able to stand the sight of Heller. He says he can't wait to see what Heller's reaction is when Amaya looks him in the eye and tells him he is dead to her. Apparently Alex has forgotten that he is in disguise, he is too busy yelling at Heller and ignoring everyone else around him. He says Heller stole Dana from him so he is going to make sure Amaya never speaks to Heller again. Heller doesn't make the connection. He keeps referring to Alex as Edward and says he won't get anywhere near Amaya, that once he gets her back from that psycho… Dana makes the connection and interrupts, "Alex? Is that you?" Alex stops short, realizing what he said gave him away. Heller continues with his rant. Once he gets Amaya back from that psycho he's going to take her somewhere safe but then he'll hunt Edward down and make him beg for mercy before he kills him. Having blown his cover, Alex shifts back to his normal form, which takes Heller completely by surprise. I say, "Well look at that… Edward can transform…" Heller immediately launches off on a new rant, demanding to know where Amaya is and what Alex has done with her. Alex says he doesn't have Heller's brat. That fucking imposter no doubt has her, and he has no idea where. But as soon as he tracks that piece of shit imposter down… I am waiting to see what Dana's reaction is going to be, so far she has only managed to stand there and look shocked and a bit confused. But before she can react any more the ground starts to shake. Strange vine like tentacles burst up from the floor, ripping through the room and into the ceiling, tearing the ceiling away and revealing the open night sky.

More tendrils tear the walls away, leaving us standing out in the open in the ruins of what had been a house. One of the tendrils had punched a hole in the floor right in front of us and then retreated. Alex Mercer jumps up through that hole and lands in the floor right in front of us. Or at least it's someone who looks like Alex Mercer… he is laughing manically and staring at Heller, not seeming to notice there is an Alex Mercer already present. Dana is looking more confused than ever, looking between the two Alex Mercers quickly. Heller is yelling that he will kill both Alex Mercers… he'll take them both on at the same time. The Alex beside me says no, this piece of shit is his. The other Alex is starting to say something to Heller but he doesn't get anything out beyond Heller's name before the Alex beside me attacks him. A fight breaks out, Alex Mercer vs. Alex Mercer, though one of them clearly has the upper hand. In addition to the usual viral form shifting abilities he is using energy attacks and lightning. He forms his blade and charges it with a bolt of lightning, then attacks the enemy Alex with a sparking blade. There isn't time to continue watching the two Alex Mercers fight, however, there are enemies attacking right there on the ground. Various types of hunters and brawlers…

I'm not entirely sure which are which, but it doesn't matter since they are all attacking. Dana isn't able to fight, so she is just trying to stay back and out of the way. That leaves Heller and me, I'm not entirely sure what to expect out of him. The question of who he will attack is answered for him as two of the enemies jump on him at the same time. I don't have time to watch and see what Heller is doing, I am being attacked by more of the enemies. I form an Alex Mercer blade from my arm and armor from Witchblade and cleanly remove the first enemy's head. The second one dodges and comes at me from behind. Witchblade blocks the attack and I drive the sword backwards into its face. No time to make sure it's dead, two more attack. By the time I finish with those two I see there is one about to grab Dana. I use Battery and call a bolt of lightning to strike it, knocking it back away from Dana and crumbling one of the few remaining wall fragments left of the house. It attacks me now and I finish it off with my blade. I look back over to where Alex and Alex are fighting. I look just in time to see one Alex pin the other to the ground using Megadeth's Crush 'Em as a song spell. The one Alex jumps down to where the other Alex is pinned. He says there can only be one Alex Mercer before he cuts the pinned Alex open and consumes him. All the enemies are gone now, either dead or they have left since the other Alex Mercer is no longer there to control them. Heller is going to attack the remaining Alex. I get between him and Alex to deter that move, I know it will not end well for Heller. Instead of attacking Heller demands again to know where Amaya is. Alex glares over at him for a bit and then grabs something from a broken table. He scribbles on it, wads it up, and throws it at Heller. It is a piece of paper. He says she is there, now go get her before he changes his mind. He chuckles and says the imposter was going to make her queen of the new world… though he has no idea why the idiot would have chosen a kid and a relative of Heller's, meaning she is most likely stupid, too. Heller gets annoyed at that and acts like he might attack Alex after all. I am still between them, I ask Heller if he doesn't think Amaya has waited long enough? She needs her father to be with her instead of playing with Alex. He glares at Alex one more time, then looks over at Dana. Dana says he should go to Amaya, she will be fine… or at least she thinks she will be… She is watching Alex closely. Heller leaves, jumping off into the night. Dana hesitates and then asks if it was the imposter the whole time, doing all those horrible things. Alex says if she had bothered to listen to him he had been trying to tell her there was an imposter on the loose. But she had preferred to give up on him and without even hearing what he had to say. She says now the imposter is gone, though, and things can be like they were. Alex doesn't seem in the mood for that, though. He says the only problem with that is once someone is dead, they don't come back… and don't forget, he is dead to her. He opens a portal and disappears through it. Dana calls to him to wait, but he is gone. She looks at me as if wanting to know what she can do. I just shrug, not knowing what to say, and then I wake up.

09/26/13

Fusing a Broken Heart
I wake up in my bed, though I know right away it isn't my real bed. It is my bed in the dreamscape world inside my inner world. I am lying there pissed off, filled with anger, filled with hurt. I don't want to get up; I don't want to deal with the world right now. I finally sit up when it feels like someone is watching me. I'm not alone. I look around the room and I see Alex Mercer from Prototype is in the room with me. I wonder what he is doing there… I get out of bed and go closer to him. I am currently so filled with anger and hate that I'm not sure what I intend to do… I want to hug someone… I want to punch someone in the face. Um… not sure doing either of those things to Alex Mercer is a good idea… but then I'm not thinking much clearly at all. When I get close enough to Alex I guess I have decided I'd rather hug someone than punch them in the face, so I find myself hugging Alex Mercer. I am so upset that I am crying, I feel there is no one I can trust, no one I can count on. I find Alex is hugging me back now… holding me close… too close? I tingle all over… I feel a bit better. I go to pull away but I find I can't… because Alex isn't hugging me after all… he's consuming me! I try to pull away again, but then decide I don't really care. So I just sit there and let it happen. Everything fades to a comforting blackness.

But the dream continues. I am still there. Inside Alex? Fused with Alex? We are one. I actually find that a bit disappointing… but I realize I feel better than I did before. Not so alone. Still rather pissed off, but pissed off at someone specific. Pissed off at Templars. I hear Alex talking to me telepathically; he asks how I am feeling right now. I say I am feeling some better, but why did he do that? At least ask first… he says he had been hoping to help me feel better. Ok, now that makes absolutely no sense… so the next time I want someone to feel better I should go eat them?! He says I can be mad if I want to, but as long as it worked… but I'm not feeling mad at Alex. I am pissed, but it is at the Templars. I want to kill Templars. It feels like the Templars have taken away everything that matters in my life… There is a flat screen television in the room with Alex / me. We are still as one. The screen shows what looks like a lab of some kind. There are scientists all over the place, and cages. Cages with people, cages with other animals… test subjects. The scientists… all Gentek assholes. I have no doubt of that. So now I am pissed off at Gentek.

Alex / I go through the television into the lab on the other side, no doubt appearing out of nowhere as far as the scientists can see. One of them asks who the fuck I am… no doubt he sees only Alex… and Alex is the last thing he ever sees. Alex's / my arm forms into a blade that splits the shocked scientist in two. Of course the other scientists see that and freak out, running for the doors in a blind panic. I want to let the animals out of their cages. The people, too. Those stupid scientists should be in the cages instead. But the scientists are all gone now. So Alex / I start releasing the people and animals locked in cages. I'm not sure where everyone will go, or how to get out of there. Some of the people and animals are injured in various ways. I focus on healing their injuries. I wonder if there are injuries there that I can't heal. The doors to the lab burst open and now a bunch of Templar soldiers come in with guns blazing.

They clearly don't care who they hit, they start firing before they even get a visual lock on where Alex / I am. The people freed from the cages are running for the exits, some of them stopping to help animals and other people on the way. A few of them get shot. I see a specific kitty is running towards the exit and takes a bullet in the head… I see a cute little face explode and I am instantly unbelievably pissed off. Arm forms back into a blade and now Templar soldiers are the targets. They are aiming more accurately at me now, but I don't really seem to notice the bullets. Slight irritants. That's about all it is. My memory of the fight is a bit of a blur… cutting through body armor like it was made of tissue paper… a lot of blood, and Templar soldiers dying. I see the remaining Templar soldiers have decided to run for it after all, and I don't feel any urge to chase after them. I would rather tend to the injured people and animals in the lab. I gather the animals together to bring them back to my inner world, I know Angelina will be glad to take care of them. Alex / I am doing that when everything fades to black. Alex says not to worry about it, he will make sure the animals are safe. So I wake up.

09/16/13

I am in line at an auditorium. I am waiting to see a Disturbed concert. I get my tickets, I am amazed how cheap they are… which is good since I realize I don't have much money. It is a small show, not a huge auditorium. There are seats around the stage. Most of Disturbed is already on the stage, and there are people standing around the stage. I am surprised at how few people there are. I have the idea it is a concert that hasn't been well publicized, only specific fans would have been able to find out about it. I make my way to the front of the room, right by the stage. I know the music here will be loud and I look forward to it. The band members are taking their places, but David Draiman is missing. The person in the lead singer position is Alex Mercer off of Prototype.

I ponder that only briefly, wondering if that means David Draiman is out sick today. I think that is a bummer that he is not there, as I have no idea what Alex Mercer will sound like singing… Well, I'm already here for now. Someone in the crowd apparently shares my concern and decides to express themselves by throwing what looks like a can of beer at Alex. Alex uses a whipfist to reach out and grab the guy, who, by the smell of him, promptly shits his pants before getting thrown to the back of the room. I hear one of the other band members laughing and saying he loves it when some idiot does that. Another one says he doesn't… he got stuck cleaning up the mess last time. No mess this time except in the idiot's pants, I see, as he quickly leaves the auditorium. The band starts playing. The song is Devour, which is one of my favorite Disturbed songs. There was no need to worry about the sound… somehow Alex sounds exactly like David Draiman. As they are singing the song it looks like Alex is staring directly at me. I do not realize it is a dream, so the idea of Alex Mercer staring at me and singing, "I will devour you…" isn't particularly reassuring. But I guess it doesn't bother me enough to make me leave. I continue listening to the song until it's over, and then they start playing The Curse. Before it gets very far I wake up.

08/09/13

Dreamscape Exploration
I am at work. I have actually found a job, though it is not a job I want at all. I am sitting at a desk in front of a computer with a phone, and the phone is ringing. I don't want to answer it. But it is my job to answer it. I'm not sure what I think is going to happen when I answer the phone, just that I am sure it will be very unpleasant. I finally pick up the phone and say that this is the help center, can I help you? There is a pause on the phone, then a strange voice speaks. The voice says that if I think I can really pull a being of pure darkness into the light then I am dumber than I look. I ask who it is, telling him again that this is the computer help line, is he having computer problems? He says no, I am having computer problems. What? I look at my computer screen and it shows an image from the game Prototype. My first thought is that I was playing it at work and I need to hide the screen before my boss returns. I ctrl + tab to another screen. The voice on the phone says I can't cure a disease with a virus. I hesitate, then I ask him if his computer has a virus. Because all of the computers are equipped with an anti-virus program that should be able to handle that. I will talk him through using it if he needs me to. He says no, I am the one with a disease and a virus. The virus feeds the disease until all is lost. I now think of the song by Queensrych called Spreading the Disease. Then I start hearing the song. The song wakes me up and I realize I have been dreaming…

I am lying in bed listening to Queensryche. The song finishes and then all is silent. I wonder why the alarm went off. I sit up and I see I am in my dreamscape bed. I am still dreaming. I get up and stub my toe on a Buddha statue on the floor. Ow! I'd swear I heard a cat laughing. There's a black cat on the chair. I go over and pet it, the cat purrs. I go across the room to the door and open it. The hall is beyond it, long and with no doors. I head down the hall, the cat is right around my feet. I see a door at the end of the hall and go through it. The entire room is filled with graffiti on the wall. So many things written. "There is no cure." "The cure is a lie." "The virus is death." "Life is a disease." "Sometimes death is better." "Stop spreading the disease." There are many other strange statements around the room. A grumbling old man enters the room with a bucket and a sponge. He starts washing the print off of the walls while muttering expletives. I realize he looks like my guardian Hetfield did before I started seeing him as James Hetfield of Metallica. I go to the next room and I see a television showing a beautiful healing spring. Nomad is there. I need to go there. I step through the television into the healing springs on the moon. I hear a voice behind me yelling. "Now why don't you go hug and kiss a deadly virus? Does that sound like a good plan to you? Go hug and kiss a deadly virus!"

Nomad looks behind me at the portal and asks who that is… I tell him I have no idea, but they're in my dreamscape, so maybe it's a subconscious fear that I need to overcome. Winter is floating in the middle of the pool. I see Alex Mercer from Prototype off to the side looking around. Go hug and kiss a deadly virus? Ok! I run over and hug Alex. He looks at me strangely but doesn't do anything else. I feel a bit awkward and I back away. Ok… now that I've made a fool of myself… I slip into the water and sink to the bottom. The water feels good. Full of healing energy. I decide to stay there instead of returning to the surface. I wait there for a while until I wake.
 
Welcome to Hell
I find myself sitting on the bottom of a pool of water. It is warm and comfortable there. It seems I was just here, and now I am back here again. I have a desire to stay here. So I just sit on the bottom of the pool for a while until Nomad swims down beside me and looks at me. He speaks telepathically since speaking underwater doesn't work very well. He tells me to come to the surface, we can go take care of the task of the month. He says I'm the one who says I know the devil, or the Lord of the Pitt, or whatever he calls himself. I say ok, and then swim up to the surface. It seems harder to get to the surface than I had thought it would be. I get to the surface and pull myself out onto the land. Alex is gone, and for that I am grateful. The memories of the previous dream are still with me, and I remember hugging Alex when I clearly shouldn't have, clearly he didn't want me to do that… I lead Nomad into the tower and to the communications room. I activate the communicator and get a connection with the Courts of Chaos, which is an area most people refer to as Hell. I get in touch with an old friend, Pilgrim, who is also known as the Lord of Darkness.

She looks like Pilgrim from the Spawn series with large black bat wings. Pilgrim comments on the fact it has been quite a while since we have talked, and we spend a bit of time talking to each other, and Nomad, too. I finally get to the point where I ask if the Pitt is around, to which Pilgrim says she believes he is. She says he's not around too often, having quite a few other multiverses to deal with, but he is around right now. I tell her that is great, I'm bringing Nomad through. One of the mirror portals opens and both Nomad and I go through it.

On the other side of the portal Nomad and I are standing in a place that definitely looks like Hell, like the biblical version of hell. There is fire everywhere, the sky is red and choked with smoke clouds. I see open flows of lava that flow like rivers and streams. Smoking volcanoes riddle the surrounding mountains, a couple of them are actively erupting. Pilgrim is right there to meet us. She says it has been so long since any of us have been out here that the Pitt can spare a bit of time if we want to meet with him. She comes with us towards what looks like a large fortress. A foreboding fortress. We go inside and to a large room where there is an even larger demon. Lord of the Pitt is sitting on what looks like a throne, well he is really more kicked back on the throne and relaxing. Nomad transforms into a somewhat demonic looking form and walks right over to the Pitt and starts talking to him as if they were old friends. The Pitt doesn't seem to mind. Nomad says that the round of drinks is on him.

He summons up some beers, different sizes dependant on the size of the person drinking it. Pilgrim and my beers are normal size, his is medium since his demon form is a bit larger than a human, and the Pitt's is HUGE. So the four of us sit there in the throne room of Hell with the devil himself drinking beers and chatting for a while. I'm not sure how long this goes on for. I don't remember any details of what we talked about, though. Not sure how much time passes before I finally wake.
 
City of Infection
I am in what looks like a park. I look around there and see it is nice and green where I am standing, but not far off I see smoke and fires burning. I wonder what is going on there. I see that I am not alone. Nomad is there with me. He looks over at me and asks if I am ready to go. He says he has already taken out several tanks and a strike package of three helicopters that were called on him because he transformed into a big cat in front of some Templar idiots. It was fun. I look around a bit more and I see Alex Mercer from Prototype is there with us, as is Q from Star Trek.

Q says the doctor is in the hospital near the center of the zone we are in. He says the dimension is pretty stable, so use mostly whatever powers we want… within reason. He looks in my direction and says dropping a massive Immortal Fire in the center of town would not be considered within reason. I hadn't even thought of dropping a massive Immortal Fire, so I am not sure why he chose to single me out. Q looks over at Alex and then at Nomad, saying such a small group should be able to get in and out without stirring up too much of a disturbance, which is what we want because stirring up too much of a disturbance might lead to a nuclear cleansing… which would be a completely pointless loss of life. Many humans were as yet uninfected, and it is only humans that are susceptible at all. Other animals have proven immune, except maybe monkeys… there were reports of monkeys in the zoo eating each other… Q looks throws me a syringe of blue fluid. He says to give it to the local Alex Mercer, it will make sure he isn't affected by the vaccine. I ask what if we don't see the local Alex Mercer. Q says he is sure we will once we start making a disturbance, and he is sure we can't do it without making any disturbance. So after saying to go at it Q disappears in a flash of white light.

So we leave the area of park that looks healthy and enter the city around it. The city looks trashed, like some kind of post apocalyptic nightmare. Cars wrecked everywhere, fires burning, even dead bodies left in the street. What I notice is that there is no movement in the street. No people, no zombies, no Templars… no one. But I hear some commotion ahead, so we keep going. We come to an intersection where there is chaos. Nomad transforms into a cat man, looks part tiger, and pounces on a zombie that was about to kill some woman.

He has little kitty claws that are as big as Alex Mercer's claws… and cuts through a couple more zombies with them. Alex's hands had morphed into claws and he tore a zombie apart before it could attack a couple of people cowering back against a car. I form my Witchblade into a sword and remove the head of a zombie before using Damage, Inc. to shoot a fireball at some other zombies. So we made our way down the main road leading to the center of the area, taking out any zombies in the way and healing any injured civilians we happened to find. I notice that there don't seem to be any Templars around, so I figure they just haven't noticed we're there. After all, we haven't made any disturbance that they would notice. The hospital is the largest building in the area and very distinct. There are Templars around the hospital. It looks like they are determined to keep anyone from going in or out. This is really easy to get around without alerting them. All three of us take the form of Templar soldiers and walk right into the hospital without being questioned.

Once we are inside, I wonder where the lab is, where will we find the doctor? I am thinking I could do a telepathic scan of someone when I hear a noise off to my left. I look over just in time to realize Alex has just consumed someone… but who? And why? He says he knows where the lab is. He says the Templars have been holding back and waiting for the doctor to finish the vaccine so they could use it for their own purposes. But time is up… the vaccine is done. He heads down a hall, Nomad and I follow him. We pass through a couple doors that say authorized personnel only and then into a lab. I look around the room. There is a man on the other side of the room near some test tubes of liquid. He is doing something on a hand held computer. There is a woman right behind him. She is about to stab him in the back! When Nomad says something to alert the man, who I am assuming is the doctor, the woman quickly hides the knife and turns away from him to see who else is in the room with her. I recognize her right away… she's Karen Parker, Alex's ex-girlfriend from Prototype.

Seeing that we are all disguised as Templar soldiers she doesn't seem particularly alarmed to see us. She speaks quietly to keep the doctor from overhearing and asks if we've come to make sure she doesn't run off with our precious vaccine. I hear some explosions outside. I wonder what is going on out there. Both Karen and the doctor look in the direction of the noise as well. The commotion dies down and all is silent again. Karen is speaking a bit louder now, asking us if we don't speak. A couple soldiers come to the door and look into the room. One of them asks if we've seen anything suspicious. He says Mercer is in the building. Karen seems a bit alarmed by that idea. The soldier says not to worry, they'll track him down. I find myself wondering, they'll track him down and then what? Get their asses kicked? The two soldiers leave the room. Karen is right next to me now, I'm not sure what she is looking for. Is she looking to see if I might be Alex Mercer in disguise? She sees the syringe of blue fluid sticking out of my pocket and asks what that is. Before I can even consider answering someone else enters the room. It's Alex Mercer, looking like himself. He says Karen should have known she couldn't hide. Karen starts making excuses, says she really had no idea what was going to happen and she is glad to see Alex is safe. Alex grabs hold of Karen, she grabs at me but just gets the syringe of fluid. On a strange hunch, I tell her to be careful with the syringe, if that stuff gets on Alex it'll kill him. She responds by immediately jabbing Alex with the syringe and injecting the contents. Of course nothing visible happens since the fluid in the syringe was just meant to make Alex immune to the vaccine. Karen looks over at me and exclaims that nothing happened. I pretend to think about it for a bit and then I say I just got it backwards… the fluid in that syringe was supposed to protect Alex, not kill him. Whew, that was close… Karen tries to pull away from Alex but doesn't get very far. He sarcastically says he can see how happy she is to see he is safe… She reaches towards me and says, "Help me…" and I can see fear on her face now. Before I even have a chance to do anything, however, Alex takes her from the room and both of them are gone. I guess I could follow them… but why? Nomad is talking to the doctor. He says we are there to make sure he gets safely out of the city with his vaccine. We head back to the front of the hospital. There is still some chaos going on there. A couple helicopters are in the air, some soldiers are yelling into communication devices to find them… and kill both of them! So no one really questions when we jack a tank. We are on our way to the edge of the city when I feel the dream slipping. I tell Nomad I will have to go, but if I'm needed I'm sure I'll be back… and then I wake up.