Thread: write a poem that expresses your thoughts and feelings

With grateful thanks to Signet, who's words have prompted me to share mine . . . I wasn't going to post this . . .




". . . . . Three Lives Behind"


I can't see where I'm going so I'll stop here for the night.
I'd like to get some rest - if I relax, then I just might -
But it's been a hard and weary road, and these wasted years, I find,
Have slowed me up and worn me down till I feel three lives behind.

The guy behind the desk in this hotel here off the street
Looked really weird, with sunken eyes; his shirt looked like a sheet.
A bony hand reached out and stopped me stiffly in my track
As he handed me the key and whispered softly: "Welcome back!"

Now, I don't get into fairy tales, and I believe what I can see,
But this old spent man, with his almost voice, put a chilling spell on me.
So I grabbed my bag and climbed the stairs - pretending not to hear -
And as I drifted off to sleep his words returned, so clear . . . . .


I dreamed that it was morning, and when I went to pay the bill
The old guy was still sitting there - so grey, so cold, so still.
When I sought an explanation of his words the night before
He just raised his weary eyes to mine, and pointed to the door.

"So many people pass this way and ask me what I mean,
But it would take Eternity to tell them what I've seen.
The last time that you passed this way (was it fourty-six, or seven?)
You stupid fool - you though that you were on your way to heaven!

"But heaven's not the home of those who pass through that cold portal -
You, my friend, have been condemned to go back, and be mortal!
So leave your bag, be on your way, and next time do it right -
'Cause if you don't we'll meet again some other cold dark night!"

My heart turned cold, my senses reeled; my mind was swamped with dread.
"What sort of crazy game is this? How can you say I'm dead?"
No answer came from those grey lips; no notice did he take
Of my so obvious distress. "There must be some mistake!!" . . . . .


I woke to darkness all around - the bed was soaking wet.
My hair was standing from my neck: this wasn't over, yet.
A faint grey light came through the blinds, but not enough to see
That the cause of my disturbance had found its origins in me!

With bones of ice and feet of lead I moved across the floor,
And slowly raised the tattered blind a little bit, no more.
The town had gone, the mist was thick, and the only thing I could see
Was an old and rusty staircase disappearing down, from me!


©sinkrimart 2011

Many thanks, cheech, and even more thanks for posting your poem. It is quite excellent!

And now, hot off the presses, is the lyric (yes, that's a correct term for it) for a song. Written just this morning, it is definitely how I feel... right... NOW. >:0

----------------

Song: Eden

This
Is this a fallen world I see now?
Is this how we were meant to fall out?
Out
Of this world does anyone know how
To find Eden

Now
Now is the time it's said to live life
Come down, come down and play me your fife
Life
Along the Broken Land, but can't you
Lead me to Eden

Time
Can anybody tell me the time
When Deos will leave this place far behind
And spread out sins like ashen ruins
Where no one will find

Tell me, where is Eden?

Dream
This life is what I call a dream
Dream
And in my dreams I see the life that should be
Dream
Carved by the maker of reality

Where is Eden?

that night , that night
the look on your face
the pain in your voice
whiskey and ice
asking god why
it wasnt fair
its never fair
Ur gone
but i want you to know
i will always love you
thank you for everything
one day soon
we will be together again

The moment awaits and the untimely change beckons your arrival

Death and dishonesty stroke your inner-self, through the untimely bliss that is neither here nor their

purely for an individuals state of mind, primal, naive

underneath the sky, in between the rain and the sunshine, deep in the ocean, far and gone, nowhere but everywhere

"So Wonderful"

I read their accounts, and I laugh and I cry
I hear all their stories, and all the more I try
To recognize that chance when it comes at night,
To loose life's chains, and to take flight

I can see the crystal lake underneath the glass bed
But I know I'll wake without going there in my head

I re-read the accounts, and determination grows
I will wage the war with my mind in the throes

Please, lead me there, guides
Let me not be the one who hides
Can't I go to sleep 'neath those diamond-cloth sheets
And then not be the one this mundane world meets?

I wish for an explosion
Although the consequence may be harsh
We believers of this plane of hopelessness
Desperate and terrified
Never the courage to drink this poison
In this hell of an earth
We are the noise of this tikking world clock
At this point where we have to choose
Does anyone has a death wish for me
Screaming but no voice coming out
No one answering
There was just doubt and me
All I could hear was the sound of termites, chewing the decayed walls of my trust
I wonder tonight the ground of which brewery will be stained from my tears
Are you coming back?
I don’t know
I don’t know….!!

I wonder why the people here
On my lovely home, Dreamviews,
Can't rhyme in their poetry
Without making breaking news

Well, really, it's still not special
When rhyme is put to text
'Cause no-one really cares
If it's prose or meter next

"Just say it!" Is the motto
And punctuation is no crown
The raw, petty expression tripe
And bawling is heard all 'round

Please, for your sake, Dreamviews,
Put some quality in your work
For can't we agree that class
Is only ignored by a jerk?


-Me

dreamviews is not YOUR lovely home signet , its a free site for everyone , and this is not a professional poetry contest , its free and aloud for all of us to express ourselves and share it with others.

Originally Posted by gogodoll

dreamviews is not YOUR lovely home signet , its a free site for everyone , and this is not a professional poetry contest , its free and aloud for all of us to express ourselves and share it with others.

Oh, for pete's sake. Really? Do you always read me wrong? :/

1. I don't claim that Dreamviews is the home I own, simply a place that I call home, as do hundreds of other people. I don't claim domain or authority.

2. I'm not declaring a contest; I'm just poking fun at the people on here who think that their feelings are clearly and competently expressed when they post bland, thoughtless rants.

This is a thread for posting "poems". Not a rant-in-prose thread.

And dear signet what makes you the expert and master in poetry to call other peoples poetry bland thoughtless rants, maybe to some one else lets say me yours seem like bland rants , its all subjective so lets not be so judgmental.

I would like to express my feelings with a poem..
But the only problem is that i don't have 'em.
So i sit and think, and i search through my mind,
WHY can't i find, am i dumb, deaf, or BLIND ?

So one day i'm just happy and fine,
And the other day i'm wanting to die,
But it's okay tho, i just cry and then smile,
Then i think again, and i do it for a while.

Why why why? Dude, why you asking me??
Now you are talking to your self, AND writing a poem for people to see.
Are you mad?! or have you just gone insane? No dude, there's just something wrong with my brain.
And my heart is aching, i can't stand the pain.

Your heart? I thought you didn't have it!
No man, i do, the hate is just a habit.
So if it keeps hurting, i will just stab it and forget it all
Now shush, i gotta go down the rabbit hole.

Yap, i always knew you are insane
But listen pal, you and me aren't the same.
What do you mean? We must be one guy.
Nope, whenever you cry, i laugh and smile.

You see now? well what you gotta do..
Dude.. I know one thing for sure..you are insane too!
I don't know, i wouldn't say so..
But if you think so then i must be wrong.

So here you go guys.. we made you a song
I though that it wouldn't be so long
But we kept talking.. thinking.. me and i..
But the question still remains, and we ask you WHY??

Bye.

Originally Posted by gogodoll

And dear signet what makes you the expert and master in poetry to call other peoples poetry bland thoughtless rants, maybe to some one else lets say me yours seem like bland rants , its all subjective so lets not be so judgmental.

This amateur knows that there is nothing subjective about structure, meter, syllable count, and rhyme.
Did you ever consider that maybe my poem was just me deciding to answer "write a poem that expresses your thoughts and feelings"? Oops. Those were MY thoughts and feelings. So either stop using relative thinking or stop bugging me for having an opinion.

Oh, and here. Have an article to read.

I am new to this
What would be lovely to read
Something well composed

Signet You can put 10000 articles teaching me about poetry but its worthless to me because to me poetry is a form of art and art in general is not something that can be structured , a human being is free to express him/her self in any form of art , the freedom in expressing is what makes art so amazing , we are not robots lets leave structure for scientific matters and when it comes to art lets be as human and not perfect as we can .

deleted by OP

Oh Mirror, the reflection of evident flaw.
From the dawn of awakening, I find myself at your will.
The countless hours, I see someone else, the desire of my heart.
To be, what I'm not, to harbor the desires as my appearance.
The appearance of my image, does not reflect my heart.
My heart and soul, I wear upon my sleeve.
For all to see, and some to beckon,

I do not want to be what people see,
I want people to see, the reflection of perfection.
Not the real fractal of a mess, buried within my tomb, six feet under my skin.

Face of an old man.
Despair in the air.
Spirit of ancestors haunting.
Burned out.
Candle with no wax to melt.
World of ants we wander.
Stone of water and fire.
Dangling in space.

Deep questions running through my mind
But they never helped me live my life
They're part of me and part of you
With bird's I'll share this lonely view

Can I write a rhyme that doesn't
Steal from living legends
Will I ever be original
Or just a thief of letters

Originally Posted by SpaceCowboyDave

Deep questions running through my mind
But they never helped me live my life
They're part of me and part of you
With bird's I'll share this lonely view

Can I write a rhyme that doesn't
Steal from living legends
Will I ever be original
Or just a thief of letters

Mind if I "thief" some of your letters for a song I'm writing?

I wrote this when my classmate died (no, I won't disclose anymore info)

"Whispers"

Whispers are always followed by silence,
And silence has wrought a broken moment
Awkwardly giggling through broken tears.
Bright lights signify the end
Followed by torrents of untamed fears.
The purpose of life we can bend,
But they are just distractions,
Denial of ultimate, inevitable demise.
Hoping for next itterations,
But Death's scythe wears a gruesome disguise.

They lowered her into the ground
Succeeded by blackish blood
Trailing the setting roses.
Beelzebub claims his love,
Lord of the Flies
Prince of the Night;
The breath of our life closes.
Beady eyes stared at Death
With a plastic grin and
Arose to drink and cut his teeth.
Lightless night brings her up,
Past lives forgotten.

They said that whispers make Death smile,
But it makes Lords of sky frown.

Music playing, throat stuck singing,
Cracking through sickly moans of song.
With choking sobs invading the sound,
The piano is ringing, but the Voices are brought along.
Tears lick cheeks of the Voices,
But the whispers mock and groan.

Originally Posted by Signet

Mind if I "thief" some of your letters for a song I'm writing?

Not at all.

Alone again, but this time by choice
It is regretful, but necessary
Worried that no one will hear my voice
I escape to the imaginary

This poem isn't mine, but it's incredibly expressive-Hear the feeling.

The moon softly speaks, In a voice that cannot be heard.
As the tide ebbs and flows, memories fade...
But the stars remember.
In a language that cannot be deciphered, they send an infinite stream of words,
to create hundreds of billions of books.

The sky is too big for me. Time flows too fast for me.
The hollow sensation of ignorance... As a collective of words rots under the earth...

Yet I scream. I cry out aimlessly.
For my voice to touch the heavens...
Until the sun rises again.

The wretched darkness replied.
No one has ever seen the future.
I extend one hand towards the empty sky and clutch at a chilly breeze.

Blow away despair!
Resign dreams and distress to the past.
The land is blanketed by a faint, sleepy glow.

I step forward!
Into an unwritten future! - Song for the Unwritten Future, by Unknown.

I can feel the emotion burning in this, can you?

Yea I know it sucks. Whatever.

Thinking about how I screwed up and then
Doing the same damn thing again

And I’m still succumbing to the loneliness
And the self-loathingness
But I’m getting better as the days go by
At least that’s what I hope That’s why I try
And with each set back I keep moving on
With a destination of a place where I might belong