Sorry if this is way too long, or in the wrong section,. if so please move it.


Okay, well. i'l just start with telling you details. i have been trying to lucid dream since september 2010,. i have had 16 lucid dreams since then to now. Sometimes, i will become confident, and i will lucid dream, but then this 'Confident' (if that is what it is) energy disapears, and leaves me demotivated and dry spelled. i always feel ready to give up, and the only thing holding me on the line is that one strand of belief that says 'Dont Quit' so i dont. but now i am becoming very depressed over it and it is causing me to feel like i cant lucid dream anymore. whenever i do lucid dream, it's not from a technique, i never intentionally had lucid dreams. i had them un-intentionally. but in a way that i slightly slightly very slightly intended to. get what i mean? so i dont know how to 'access' that again. because it was no technique that really made me lucid . i have read posts of subconscious will power (like 'Possibly the key to lucid dreaming?') and i have been trying to connect with my subconscious or superconscious so much that well,. the other day i told it to do something and it did and well then it doesnt. i dont know what is wrong. i did believe i would be able to do something but then i cant. and i do really believe in it and all that . i feel on the end of it here. :/ . i dont know what to do, i'm so very very lost. and if you say what my 'technique' is, is a DILD. its not. trust me it never feels like it. and its barely intentional. i try to become motivated again, because confidence and motivation is what gives me the ability to lucid dream i think, but i just cant anymore. i can never gain it. and its driving me down to the ground. I really badly have a passion for lucid dreaming,. I think it's the best thing ever!. i motivated and encouraged 5 people to lucid dream, using great words and pics, but i cant even motivate myself. what do i do? someone please help me... i tried WILD, WBTB, and DEILD,DILD, and MILD. none work. i think i tried them all. i think something inside me says i dont need a technique but more of a 'Confidence' or 'Something' that allows me to have the power to. does that sound strange? . sorry :/ thats how i feel. and i dont even know if it IS confidence. i'm very very scared and afraid i will lose this. and i dont want to. i love it with a ♥ on top. lol. I tried all the 'tricks' to get my subconscious make me lucid dream, but it never really works, and i admit i have a fairly genuine relationship with it. i try everything. i'm so lost. I'v tried taking breaks,. i'v tried to do everything i can, but then even my recall lowers. i'm a very open minded and aware person. i'v tried ADA, reality checks, anything you can think of ,. meditation, normal sleeping. And if you think i'm trying too hard, i'v tried to go easy. still nothing.... So if anyone can help me.... advice me... or motivate me... in any way please please help. I BEG you. I NEED your help. it will be greatly appreciated... god i hope people help me.