Long Time, no see. Still I suffer.

[Vandrosdis]

It has been years since I have signed into this site, been really busy with life, my new son Leo and working. I hardly get a moments peace to sit and do what I want to do, Kids eh!!! Still, Leo has given me a brief chance to myself, and I am making good use of it. I am glad to see the site still going, and all the people posting threads. Hopefully some of you may remember me from way back. If you do, I still suffer with the same condition as before. Dreams becoming halucinations. I have now been diagnosed as having chronic night terrors. No medical reason and diagnosis still ongoing. It has been about 7 years now, and still no answer or control. The doctors and consultants are confused as night terrors mainly only happen as a young child and are grown out of. I grew into mine at the age of 15ish and am still suffering weekly occurances at 27. I have developed a way of manipulating them in my favour, but it never lasts for long, but they are only the ones which I consider harmless. The nasty ones are still as violent as ever, with a twist. I often wake up in sheer panic convinced that if i breath just once more i will die. Or if I swallow just once more I will die. The only place that stops me from dying is if I can get to my bathroom, and at the time I cannot stop myself from going or I might die. I now have halucinations even before I fall asleep, sometimes minutes after laying down in bed. I can now tell when I will have a bad night, as the evening leading up to bed will consist of: blue flashing lights, strange squeaking noises, banging noises and strange things caught in the corner of my vision. I then know I am in for a rough ride. Previously on this site, someone gave me advice to harness this, and use it to my advantage. Well I sort of have and am still developing the skills. As it turns out from previous replies years ago, I have been lucid dreaming my whole life and not realised. Since discovering that, I have had some amazing dreams, and dreamt within a dream three times deep before I actually woke up, just like inception, only 3 years ago. All in all, I am still no further along with a complete diagnosis, but I feel that will now be pointless. It's all about control. If anyone who remembers me, or doesn't and knows of what I can do, or has any advice or questions, please reply. To all that remember me, and all the new people, Hello, it's good to be back.

[saltyseedog]

I don't know why but I love nightmares. Maybe you can turn them into something you like.

[Sornaensis]

Ahh, naming your son in honour of a forum legend. I like it.

[shadowofwind]

I'm relatively new here, but here's a few comments related to my own experience with nightmares. First, let me relate the following dream about 'Leo'....A few hours before the plane landed on the Hudson river a couple of years ago, I was napping and dreamed of directing the bird into an engine. The dream was not exactly literal. The bird was a blob about that size, and the 'engine' was a small building of about the right size, with an opening and a metal contraption inside. The fuselage of the plane was long narrow building next to it. It was in slow motion. When the bird went in, the engine rung like a bell and flew apart, with a sound that I associate with manifesting disaster, like an earthquake or tsunami. Leo was the spirit of courage which landed the plane. The lesson of the dream, as I understood it, was how my love of death is close to courage and can be transformed into something better. The dream included hymns of praise to this 'Leo' fellow, who in the dream somewhat resembled a polecat. The way I dealt with my recurring nightmares, as a child, was to decline to be manipulated by them emotionally. I'd just be bored with the fear, not willing to indulge it. I got to the point where I could do that in part through prayer. it seemed I was comforted or assisted by an angel. I'm not Christian, and have no faith in the Jesus story, but if I ignore Christian theology and think towards the inspiration that is behind the name of Jesus Christ, like its in another realm, independent from its twisted manifestation in our world, that's where the help is. Once I was able to free myself emotionally, the dreams went away, like a weakening vortex or a relaxing knot. Another angle on this is to recognize the fear in the dreams as the reverse side of my own hatred, and to work to do something about that. I made this connection much later, maybe about 5 years ago. I woke up after being assaulted by a violent blue light, like a scream everywhere at once, and I could still feel it in my heart, as my own anger. Another angle, which I'm more confused about, is what I should be doing with my psychic tendencies. Its too weak and uncontrolled to be of practical use, and I'm not sure if I should be trying to develop it. I think the important thing is to work on the moral/spiritual development, and the psychic stuff will take care of itself. I'm a bit skeptical of psychic development like its a martial art - it seems like putting the cart before the horse. And I think its dangerous. If you open the door too wide too soon, your uncontrolled desire tears you apart. There's just too much power there. Yet I think the door can't be completely closed either, and trying to suppress it is probably bad also. Certainly finding the right path in this regard is important, whatever it is. As another note that might be relevant, from my experience procreative power is related to psychic power, in a way that I don't understand. So the age your dreams started makes sense, and I would guess that the solution probably has some relevance to that topic, which I've read we're supposed to stay off of on this forum. My sister has severe problems with headaches. It seems akin to your problem, in a different form. I know I don't have the answer to it, or at least not the whole of it, for you. I wish you the best though, it sounds tough.

[Baron Samedi]

I used to have lucid nightmares for years before I learned dream control. You have to turn and confront your fears.

[Nefarious]

I don't have the same condition as you but trough my experience I know that some terrors in dreams are beyond your average control, they are beyond logic and manipulative knowledge. I've had several. Once I woke up in terror ran out of my room and was afraid to go back because of the light bulb knowing this completely illogical fear it still took me a few minutes to overcome it. I think that it might have something to do with "fear" chemicals released in your brain on some occasions. If that is the case it's not no simple to "control" it because it would be a subconscious process. Some suggest that you could override subconscious processes (such as controlling heartbeat) with practice but it would require some work with concentration.

[hoffmandebra]

I have suffered from night terrors for about 10 years now. Mine are a little different though. I wake up screaming with a very rapid heart beat. I am starting to wonder if what I am experiencing is out of body vibrations and becoming terrified by them. I do not know, and thankfully this is not a every night happening. I am sure I am just a joy to sleep with as I have often disturbed the whole house. Good luck to you I wish I was more help. I can only commiserate and tell you you are not alone.

[Matt123]

I never really had any nightmares, only after taking melatonin occasionally. I believe over time you should become aware of the terrors in your dreams as just your mind and instead of being afraid learn to embrace them. I know its easy to say it so my apologies though if you overcome them I reckon you will become a much stronger person in mind and body. PS. Anyone saying "I wish I had nightmares" you do not realize that these dreams do in fact scare, I had a dream once where there was this dark shadowy creature with huge claws looking for me while I hid under the coffee table, it ended up finding me and slowly it lowered its claws down through me which actually sort of hurt (mostly dream sense). This is probably nothing compared to many nightmares that people experience but I did end up waking my self up in fright.

[tommo]

Guys, night terrors aren't nightmares. Night terrors involve the person acting out the nightmare. They are also usually more intense I think. I don't really know any advice except trying to control them, however you think will work. I'm going out on a limb here but.... There was this one episode of House where a kid developed night terrors as a teenager. The episodes are sometimes based on real cases so it could be something to look in to. He ended up having measles which had lay dormant since he was a baby coz his mother wasn't vaccinated. One of their other diagnoses was neurosyphillis. Probably unlikely, and I don't even know if it was a real case, but could be worth getting some blood tests just in case. Good luck!