NyxCC

Wbtb: I drag myself out of bed, drink a bit of latte (40?mg) and take lecitin, go straight back to bed trying to cut corners on staying awake. There is like zero effect on increasing my wakefulness but feeling guilty to be skipping my wbtb I keep waking up (yet still feel drowsy). I spend the remaining sleep time in a NREM limbo, a mix of deep sleep, HI and constant wakes.

There is a brief scene where I realize that am already in and start walking around but I either lose lucidity or wake up shortly after.

Keep turning and tossing annoyed that I just don't have the right wakefulness as I didn't do my wbtb. I repeat my goals and try to concentrate on my body.

I find myself staring at some screen ascertaining that I am in the dream. Everything is very unstable at this point so I just keep swiping the screen in front of me, pretending to be involved in the dream for a few seconds. When I feel I'm ready, I move to the side, which reveals that I am in my old room again. This is a bit annoying as I wanted to do the valentine card task, so I head towards the window. There is some furniture, slightly in the wrong place blocking the way. I close the cupboard door that blocks the way but it doesn't fully close and click and keeps opening. I just don't want to spend more time dealing with it, so I sneak forward while holding it then let it go. I go towards the balcony door which is closed and I try to open it via handle but it gets stuck. I decide to pull and it opens nevertheless. The action of opening this locked door produces a weird physical somewhat painful sensation in my body of resistance and as if the object is actually touching me (bearing some resemblance to phasing sensations).

I go outside and look around. I see the flowers and wonder could I be really dreaming? It looks very realistic and close to memory but is it possible that I still live here? Initially there are no DCs in sight which pisses me off due to the task I had in mind. I have to jump again but am almost certain that a quick jump or even a slow climb down can mess with stability at this point (due to quick change of perspective and reduction in tactile sensations). I look down and see one of the two sisters. She looks nasty as usual. I recall some contemplations about dealing with people from real life in dreams and decide to be honest with her. "Hey, you know what? You are really annoying"

After that I have no more desire to talk to her and contemplate going back inside to look for people within a reaching distance (I also wonder if I should just summon one here). The dream thins out.

I do a quick review, pissed off that I couldn't find any people, then continue with my limbo sleep.

After the nth turning and tossing, I find myself in another dream. It's a bright day and I am on a very distorted version of my old street. I immediately recognize it's a dream (awareness, no trigger). There is a middle aged woman with colorful knitted clothes and I remember the valentine card task. Very aggressively and without saying anything, I expect her to produce a card for me. She holds a number of items like banknotes, little pieces of paper, etc, that I browse but nothing looks like a V-card. Disappointed, I leave her and go down the street where I see bf and one of our friends. They look invitingly at me and I quickly go to where they are and ask bf if he has a V card for me. Alas, he coldly cuts me off "No." I think about how my expectations could have influenced his answer.

Bf and the other guy continue down the street. I catch up and try again "Are you sure you don't have a V card for me? I clearly remember you were carrying one!" This seems to do the trick and he hands me the V card. I examine it to see it has a number of Chinese characters on top and some almost normal words below them. There are a few love related words that are arranged like a short poem. As I try to read the words keep changing. I even hold the card from a distance to see if this would make a difference. I remember our brain actually doesn't need to read the entire word to make out the meaning.

Bf is still here and I say to him while wondering if he could possibly be dreaming too. "The words keep changing, see? Do you know why that is? It is because it's a dream."

I wake up.

Date: 11 Nov

A great deal of strong vivid dreams (alas no notes for all taken or reviewed)

Nld frag: Some sort of cool TK practice and one of the DCs asks me how I have achieved such proficiency. My reply - I have practiced this a lot in dreams.

Mini wbtb: dreams were cool, so I had the desire to just sleep but forced myself to repeat a few mantras and reviewed the tasks.

LD: At our old home with mom in the corridor. There are little bugs that mutate into flies and we try to hunt them. After a while I leave the place and am in an unknown location with Chinese mint candy that is the cause of all the bugs. Once I open it, a little bug comes out and runs away to mutate.

There's a Chinese guy sitting next to another DC and I go to him to explain what happened before that.

Memory gap and scene transformation. I'm in what's supposed to be a dream version of a slightly familiar neighborhood. I greet a number of praying people, while flying around the corner. I continue on my way in this now nicely looking neighborhood, my awareness is gradually increasing to lucidity as I continue gently flying forward and up and down. I recall a recent conversation about flying and think about that for a moment.

Then I remember the totm about finding a pile of leaves and jumping in it and look around. There is a beatiful blossoming purple magnolia tree and lots of petals on the ground. Could that do? No, wait! It's supposed to be fall right now, but oh the tree looks great and a version with petal jumping would have been awesome too. I decide to scan the area for any proper for the season vegetation and see some leaves on the ground and a few piles of them. As I approach one of the piles, it diminishes in size, so I turn to another pile that is neatly gathered in a wooden crate.

At this point, I begin to feel the dream thinning so rush forward and jump into the crate. I fall inside with the leaves and the dream nastily generates a number of metal pieces where I hurt myself. I find myself in a fallen semi seated position thinking about all this. This has been one of the very realistic experiences where you actually jump, fall and hurt yourself. It feels very physical, with great proximity to real life sensations and aching feedback from all body parts and your position. The pain is more towards dull, but equally realistic. In this moment, I hope that the amount of sensory information would help stabilize the dream as is often the case, but the dream comes to its natural end.

I'm happy about totm, but feel sleepy and do a rather quick mental review.