rshort1202

I’m at a beach with what seems like some of the family. It is definitely a beach on the ocean coast. It looks like Hawaii or the California coast. The sand is long and also very deep, sloping down to reach the water. The waves come in large but not violently. It is dim out but the scene seems to be lit with some glow, maybe twilight or moonlight. I’m in the water now, with Dad and Stella. Stella swims after something - a toy?, not an animal. She dives down quite a ways after it. I’m apprehensive at first but then relax when I see how well she’s doing.

I am at Camp Richardson with some of the family. Right now we are in some trailer that we are touring or in which we are planning a tour. There is something about it being a small space and people not wearing masks. I think David from Discology is here. Now we are down at the beach. The beach is a deep and wide expanse of only sand that doesn’t seem to be crowded by other people. The water is calm and devoid of boats, etc. I am a ways out and jumping off a tall (20 ft?) wooden structure. There’s something about the Grateful Dead - maybe they’re playing in the background? I jump in and immediately hit the bottom, hard, but it doesn’t really hurt, which surprises me because I thought it was much deeper. Back on the beach, Michelle is here and brings me a Starbucks? coffee, which I think is very sweet of her.

I am walking in Mom’s neighborhood when I notice an old lady staring at me from behind the wooden fence around her yard. She’s wearing sunglasses, some kind of hat, and I think a mask. Despite all this obscuration, I can tell that she’s older (maybe also because I think she’s wearing a sweat suit). As I walk, I look back, turn, and flip her off with both middle fingers. I don’t think I expected a reaction, but I can tell it’s really set her off. I think she wants to come out and fight me. I can see her starting to go through the house to come out here. I think about taking a right at this street, but think I’ll be highly visible. I hear her shouting in the house for someone to come get me and/or call the cops. Instead, I turn around and head through some marshy area with a walking path through it. I run across a white bridge that is a contrast to the dim water and marshy greenery. This seems to happen in slow motion, and I have time to notice how beautiful this scene is. I think that I should remember it so it might have an effect on my dreams or something similar. I think there’s one more bridge but also that I’ll have to walk through the water at some point. I think I’m wearing slippers? Earlier I also noticed how I was wearing fairly bright colored clothes. I think the police may be close.




I’m with Melissa on what seems to be a small porch? It’s really more of a small, flat protrusion from the side of a house, with mesh sidings and top. It’s just big enough for us two and I think the bottom of it is some kind of padding. All of it is black. We seem to be fairly high up and overlooking a long beach. I think we’re both naked. My head is close to between her legs, and I start going down on her. She crawls on top of me and I continue.

I’m on a walk. I get to the edge of a driveway, where a Black man has met and is talking to a white, male police officer. I get the impression he has come down here so the officer won’t go on his property. Now, another Black man comes out and does the same thing. The officer leaves amicably and then the first man turns to me and starts handing me some cash, a few crisp bills. He has short hair and seems very genuine. I think it’s a few 20s and I don’t even know what it’s for, so I say no, I can’t take it. The second man, with shoulder length dreads and baggier clothes, tries doing the same, and I think I give in. I think at the beginning of this, I put on headphones to listen to a Tedeschi Trucks Band show (the song was ‘Laugh About It’ into a drum segment). The weather was cooler - I had pants and a long sleeve. I was walking on the right side of the roads [sic] as two girls were coming towards me. I noticed a car coming from behind them and from behind me as I had to go around them to the left, thinking it would leave very little room for the cars.




I’m walking into a store with Sage. I think it’s a reptile or animal store. On the left, I notice three tanks on stands that’ve been covered with a black film or cover. Two older ladies working here say hi and then I think profile or customer service me. This irritates me as we walk into a larger back room, Sage way ahead of me.




I’m on a walk and have ended up on what looks like a sandy hillside that overlooks a beach and the ocean? It is sunset and the thick and vivid layers of deep reds and oranges are absolutely beautiful. There is some kind of electronic trance music playing and it makes for a very ethereal moment. I’m now down on the beach and there are a bunch of people dancing to the music. The sunset is the background, but there are also strobe lights. I think I start dancing.





Granny has died, but I feel comforted knowing that she had the opportunity to say bye to everyone and also that she came to me in a dream (*this seemed very real, and I was recalling pretty much exactly our visit with her yesterday).

I am in a bookstore (that looks pretty similar to Grassroots). I notice Susan Tedeschi in an area by a large window. She has a small group of people around her and is singing to them. Everyone is moving along to the music and having a good time, but I notice that a lot of the, Susan included, are frequently yawning (I also notice Seth from work). I know this isn’t because they’re bored, but because it’s late. Now, I think I am looking around and notice about six DVDs on an end cap. I grab one of the bottom ones; it is a House of Leaves movie that I’m not sure I knew existed. I think the front has a picture of a house, small and simple. The back has a picture of the house, I think from the other side, further away. In the foreground is a ‘woman’., I think back against a fence. Her head is definitely that of a human, but her body looks to be the body of a spider. It is proportionate, which is unsettling, I guess because it is something that should not be that exists so doubtlessly. I get the sense that the one half of her body is mirrored from the other. She is blond and though her face currently seems to be screaming or twisted in anguish, it is attractive. The whole image is tinted red and is subtly but acutely disturbing. There is a small group around me and one asks me to describe the plot of House of Leaves. I hesitate, not really wanting to, then give in. I say it is about a family that moves into a house, where everything goes fine until one day they discover a door that didn’t exist before. I seem to not remember much of the plot and leave it at this. My speech is slow and descriptive and more confident than I thought it’d be.




I’m outside somewhere (a beach?) with some people from work. Someone has asked me and Seth?to move some TV screens off of a table. This plastic folding table is very close to the water. We procrastinate until I see Rosy walking some people over here. I think they’re why they needed to be moved, so we do it really quick. I’m now sitting across from Lauren at a picnic style table. I’m cognizant of how we’re not ‘6 feet’ away. The background is of tall pine trees and a twilight? sky. An owl flies around; I lay down, extend my leg straight up, and try to get it to land on the bottom of my foot.

I am walking through what looks like Dad’s neighborhood (maybe on one of the higher streets, like Virginia Foothills). I run into Kat and she ends up walking with me. It is near sunset and some of the lower and plumper clouds are getting some color. The rest are smaller and almost evenly spaced, bright white against the blue. I look directly up and notice a glowing sliver of the moon. It’s all very pretty. Kat mentions the sky too, saying she’s grateful for Emma for getting her to pay more attention to it, and that she wants to see it more often. I take some pictures of it as we walk. We end up at her house. I think the garage door is open, and I can tell by the way she’s talking that she has intentions to leave now. Before she does, I somewhat bluntly mention how I want to stop drinking. This seems to pique her interest, and she talks to me about it. I tell her I feel like quitting altogether but am not sure if I should stick with moderation. She pulls a little red champagne flute from somewhere and hands it to me, saying I could use it for moderation. I look at it and its almost grimy looking opaque sides, imagining how it might hold a small serving. I kind of like the idea and think I might take it, but then change my mind. I say that I want it to be a mindset thing and not something like this. Now, Chelsea has shown up, I think in a car. She stands behind us and when she sees me she recognizes me but thinks I’m someone else. I tell her no and think it slightly odd that she wouldn’t remember me. I am now walking back, now either on a dirt road or a road surrounded by dirt and small hills. There’s a small stream of water running down this slope, through the soil and grasses. I follow it and see where it meets another stream on an opposing slope, turning to one and running downwards. I look out to my left and notice a hill where water appears to be coming from. There’s a tiny canyon carved into the soft looking dark brown soil, and I imagine walking through it. I am walking right by where the streams meet, doing okay with stepping on the sturdier patches of soil and grasses. Most of it is still soft and it’s hard to tell what will give, so I end up getting both of my shoes wet and muddy. I end up back home, rinsing and scrubbing them. I put them out to dry even though it’s pretty overcast.




I’ve gotten an email from the new girl at work (it’s not actually the girl who is supposed to start. I think I see a profile picture on the email or something and it’s an unfamiliar heavyset white girl). She’s asking about me not being there for a shift, but I’m pretty sure I haven’t been scheduled. I think I’ve been using time off. She sounds more like a manager than a coworker and kind of annoying. After the text there are a few pictures of a hotel room - I think it must be a work thing. The hotel seems nice and also very familiar. I think I must have stayed there before. I think it looks more impressive than it actually is. A picture of the shower shows the floor of small, dark pebbles and the opposing stainless steel shower heads. Now, I am in the hotel. It looks like someone had just been here but tidied a bit before leaving, so I guess I just missed her. There’s a full looking black garbage bag in the abnormally large space adjacent to the toilet. The toilet itself actually has a garbage bag around it, somehow from the ground up. I adjust the opening of the bag so as to be able to use the toilet.




I am somewhere with the family. We’re in a plain, rectangular building that is for something like customs or passports or photos (something that we have to do together as a family). I notice quite a few other families here too, I think seated at tables. Whatever we’re doing here, the personale is being very aggressive with us. They are making us do tasks or challenges that seemed to be designed to result only in failure. A younger guy, I think in a uniform, tries to handcuff me but only gets one finger. He notices, his facial expression betraying his embarrassment, and tries again. The same happens, though he doesn’t notice this time. He tells me to now “clap above your head and find some shade.” I think he also holds me down to ensure failure. Still, I succeed in clapping above my head, slightly satisfied with defying his expectation of failure. I’m not sure about the shade part though. These things go on for a while longer. When we are done, I’m thinking about how I’m going to write to someone about how atrociously we were treated.




From a third person perspective I am seeing a high rise building (a hotel) that stands alone on a sprawling fine sand beach. The building seems somewhat modern and is mostly a tower but with some structural embellishments at the base. It is also way too near the water and, in fact, there is currently water submerging the first few floors. I think there’s something about the occupants just staying inside when it floods, though that seems counter intuitive. Someone is interviewing a lone, blond man maybe in his late 20s. He seems foreign, probably European, though he is speaking more articulately than most native speakers. I think he’s talking about the structural design and why it is flooding.

I am in a fairly large used bookstore. The shelves are dark wood, tall, and full. The aisles are large and grid-like, but the place seems dim. It has a cluttered but homey atmosphere. I’m looking through the large ‘H’ section for Aldous Huxley. There is a couple looking at this section too; I politely step around them, but I think they are right in front of where I need to be. I think they move and I find a couple of Huxley books. I am now looking at a narrow shelf at the end of one of the aisle shelves. There are two cassettes? and their covers are two different pictures of Makayla and some guy on the beach. They are both in swimsuits and standing next to each other, arms around one another. It looks like Hawaii. I find it slightly odd that these are here and wonder why they are. There is also a haphazard stack of small, square, used notebooks. I flip through one, intrigued by going through someone else’s writing. I notice a date - 2000 or 2001. At the end, there is a picture of a hand holding a pen or pencil.




(I think this may be a part of the last dream, but it also may not be). I have arrived in Hawaii. I think it is the big island and I think I may be meeting up with Jim and Rhianna. I’m walking through some foliage, toward the beach. The plants thin and give way to an expanse of sand that slowly slopes to the ocean. The sun is shining languorously on the interspersed people enjoying this space, and the whole scene is peaceful and beautiful. Now, I am on a plane back. It is very dark out, but I notice buildings that are dangerously close… until I realize that this plane is graceful landing on a wide freeway, on which I think there are still cars. It looks like the bay area.

I am at the lake (Tahoe, I’m pretty sure) with some family, I think Granny and Mom and maybe Makayla. We are at a beach that is not sandy, but more rocks and pine needles. There is also a fair amount of trees coming down all the way to the waterline. I have some clothes that I think have just been washed, because they are still damp. I am looking for a clothesline or even a string, but I don’t find anything. Now I’m at work with either Melissa or Laynie, still looking for a clothesline. We can’t find one anywhere, until we ask Carolina. She takes us to a stockroom, it being the only place she can think of that would have one. Sure enough, we look to the right and I see some green lines hanging from a hook near the ceiling. I tug on one, not sure how to get it down. I flick it a bit, and it comes off the hook. They look somewhat surprised, and I joke about not knowing how I just did that. Though the line had reached near the top of the high ceiling, it is barely even a foot long as I am holding it up I’m just slightly disappointed. I guess I’ve settled though, as I’m back on the beach. I’m walking back to our spot and noticing towels and clothes simply draped over the lower tree branches. I think it occurs to me that I could’ve just done this, but I seem pretty set on the clothesline.

I am at work (though it doesn’t really look like it - it does look like a retail store, but not necessarily JCPenney). It feels like I am upstairs, and I am with two unfamiliar others, one guy and one girl. We are sitting and playing a board game. The board is larger and sitting atop something. I think there are a few pieces, one being a longer, black piece of food (like a brownie?) Apparently when it is your turn you tell another player what to do and they are supposed to do it. I say this because the guy has told me to go count all the hangers in the store, and I am going to do it. I think it’s going to be hard to impossible but that’s just how the game works. I start on it, in what looks like the hallway to our employee entrance. I am counting and thinking of a strategy to not miss any when I see Mairin putting out some new clothes. They are men’s long sleeve button ups, in blues with subtle patterns, and I kind of like them. She is telling me and one other something as she fills an empty rack with a handful of the shirts. Now, a black man comes in and asks a simple question. I answer it, and he is super excited and impressed with me. On his way out, he gives me a pretty long hug. I had went for a handshake, but adjusted to a hug. He tells me thanks again, etc. I call him brother, and then hope he doesn’t take it the wrong way - it seems like he doesn’t. He asks if I like some orange beer? I’m not sure at first but then he specifies and I realize what he’s talking about and say “oh yeah.” He leaves and comes back in with a bottle of one and a glass. He gives them both to me, and I notice the glass has a little bit of what looks like peanut butter inside of it. I think that it’s gross and it’s probably just been sitting in his car or something, but that it’s a very kind gesture.




I am in some kind of cabin. There is a counter to order food and large paper menus hanging above it. I have to get kind of close to the counter to read the menu, and the younger looking employees are all looking to me as if I’m ready to order. To signal that I’m not quite ready, I start looking at the bookshelf below the counter. I notice a few stacks of books, one stack being maroon and antiquated looking books. I notice that every other ‘book’ isn’t really shaped like a book, but more like a box for a nice pen or something that shape. It looks like they’re in a series or all go together. I notice a girl off to the left poke a note out from behind something sort of secretly. I assume the note will be something about me ordering food. I go over and she hands me a different note, a full size paper. I glance at it, having no idea what it could be about. I think it could be about me or that it could be some kind of petition. I just fold it and hold onto it to look at it later.




I am at a small (rock?) beach at what looks like a large, clear pond. Emmy’s mom? sits next to me, and I notice Emmy swimming. I want to show her a picture of Makayla because they look so similar. As I talk to her, I am forgetting Emmy’s name, but remember it right before I have to use it.

I am at work when Charmi comes to visit. It almost looks more like a house. Scott is here and begrudgingly gets up to get the door for her. He opens it and immediately turns away from her. He talks to her detachedly but doesn’t really look at her. He is sitting and, for whatever reason, I notice his mustache moving slightly as he speaks. Now I think it is just Charmi and me. She asks if it’s been pretty slow, slightly derogatorily. Just as I say ‘yes’, I notice a group of two girls and one guy about my age what definitely look like they’re trying to steal. They all look clean cut and put together, but I notice the one girl carrying a stack of Levis and wearing a pretty full looking bag. The other girl is carrying a small armful of merchandise as well. They are just past what seems to be an opening in the floor for an escalator. I think they notice me eyeing and walking towards them. I walk up to them and don’t even need to say anything before they start tossing the merchandise down onto shelves and displays and walking out. I sort of wander around now and just so happen to walk up on the guy coming back in, on the phone. He notices me, but continues walking and walking with only a slight hesitation. I hear him casually say that he’s just gotten pinched/fucked? (or neither of those, but something similar?) I wonder if he is really trying to come back for something.




I am with Melissa in what seems to be the ocean, right about where the waves are breaking. We are waiting for them to come in and are riding them for a ways before going back out to catch another. It is simple yet fun. A few big ones start coming in and I fear that they’ll break on us, but they do not. The beach is a slightly sloped expanse of golden sand, upon which I notice only our towels and stuff set up. Everything seems to be lit, though the sky seems to be dark.

I am in some room, maybe a kitchen, in a house or building that seems to be by a beach, probably on the ocean. The place is dim and seems to be empty, except for Dad, who is here celebrating his birthday. There is no one here, so I assume it is just too early for them to be showing up. He shows me a little machine on the counter top that has a few tap handles. There is what looks like a thin, green hose. On it is a circular piece with an indentation (like one for a screwdriver), which corresponds to a piece on the machine. Once inserted, it can be turned and creates a sound like it is adding carbonation or something similar. It also allows the beer to come out. I look at the options and choose a witbier. I pour it into my Artown cup at a 45 degree angle. It seems to pour quickly, but doesn’t produce much head. I take a sip and it is pretty tasty. I look at the other options, two being home brew?, one IPA, and a Revision IPA with a pretty cool graphic (space?). I think the others are more eclectic, constituting a pretty decent selection for so few handles. I think I am going to go sit outside.




I am seeing a video of Dad at some circular bar counter that looks to be encircling a pool. The whole thing is not very big, but it looks pretty cool. I think we’re supposed to be on a family trip and he’s already there without us. I then see a filter or location on the video that says he’s only at an airport (in Vegas?). Now I am where I think we are going, I think with Makayla. The place is a fairly large and high ceilinged room with a large, rectangle pool in the center. Along the walls around it are what look like doors to hotel rooms. We start looking for one that’s open. You can’t really tell what’s locked or not by looking at it, and I feel weird trying all the door knobs. It seems like most are locked. I get towards the end of the row and hear movement behind one of the doors. The very last door then opens, and coming out of it is a boy probably in his late teens, with long and center parted dirty blond hair, wearing only what looks like boxers or small swim trunks. I assume he is about to swim. I consider asking him to see the inside of the room, but think it’d be a little too intrusive.




I am with Sage and her old friend Sierra Fiester in some large room with a bouldering wall. The bouldering wall is not too long, but it is pretty tall and slightly overhanging. I am attempting a problem and its big move. There is a thin crash pad on the ground that I have them move, since it is not where I’d need it if I were to fall. I ready myself for the big move out right, but never commit, afraid to fall. I end up just using different holds to climb to the top, a little disappointed in myself. I still try to make it harder, with big moves and small holds, including small crimps. I use a large half-moon shaped hold (the one from Rocksport and Basecamp), I think getting a hand or two and a heel on it at one point. I am making loud vocalizations of effort at each move.

I am in some kind of bathroom or shower room. There are two larger stalls, I think with a toilet and shower head (just on the wall, a drain for the runoff) in each, that are laid out as inverses of each other. There is some girl in the other one. I think that we have been assigned to these at the same time based on us being opposite gender or something to do with our siblings? I am sitting on the toilet in here and can see her showering through the gaps in the stall walls. Her back is facing me, but the side of a breast could still be revealed in a slight turn of her body. I’m more worried about her seeing me though, as I think there’s a mirror in which she could do so. I move my body a bit to where I can no longer see her. Now, I think this girl is gone and Melissa is here in the stall with me. For a moment we were at a double sink counter, me at the left. It felt like we were on a trip and it felt weird to have the left side. I think we’re now holding each other in the shower water and talking. We touch each other.




I am with Dad and Makayla on a sprawling beach of bright ochre sand. I get the notion to run and jump into the water and tell them I’m going to do so. I run, but when I get to the water I am met with a powerful current that renders me incapable of getting any farther. I keep trying but cannot surmount the bombardment of the unceasing tail end of these ocean waves. They are quite long, and I notice how hard they churn the water.

I am outside, at what seems to be a beach, with Melissa, Brooke, and possibly Breezy. It is dark out, and there seems to be some sort of smaller event going on. There are some tables and bar counters, etc. I break off from them to go buy some shots, unannounced. I’m not really sure what to go; after talking to the bartender, I end up with two shots of ‘something fruity’. I can smell it, and it is fruity. I take them back to give to Melissa, but Brooke grabs them and takes them both at the same time. I’m now in a different area. There’s a nicely dressed guy here buying a bottle of something. I’m worried about money, but then remind myself to live a little. A bottle of fine German Riesling for only $126, he remarks, as if that’s a steal. I agree, but then start to think I’ve seen that for less.

I am outside somewhere - the slight incline, soil composition, array of granite stones, and surrounding pines suggest Lake Tahoe. I follow a trail down a moderately steep hill. It is not long at all before I reach the bottom and the sandy beach. The best beach spots are some yards away to my left and right. They both are filled with people. I’m looking for a space to pee, but this seems too close to the people, so I start back up. I’m now inside, walking up an enclosed stairway. It is carpeted in a maroon or similar color. I think the walls are wooden, making the place seem older. I still need to use a bathroom and, as I’m coming up another flight, I see one built into the wall right off the staircase. I step in and it’s very small, with just enough room for a toilet and sink. I think I use it and then continue on my way. The stairs end at the entrance to a fairly large room. The room is dim and home to a large, square, wooden dining table that takes up a fair amount of it’s space. Melissa’s family is seated around it, seemingly most of the way through a meal, as I join them. Melissa is across the table from me, but her mom is at the corner right next to me. I notice a few assorted, empty/near empty wine bottles. I also notice everyone, including myself, has a glass with about ¾ of an inch of red wine in it. I wonder why they’re all filled similarly.

I am on what seems to be a beach. It is long and open, with soft and very white sand. Melissa is lying on a towel, while I’m a little ways away. I think she has my phone and is doing something on it; I run over to her to talk to her/look at whatever she’s doing.