non-lucid

(Older Dream)

Non-lucid
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I was walking along and saw a trash pile - huge trash pile - before me. I stared at this heap and noticed something moving within the pile. I moved some of the trash and found a little bird. He was brown and small. I took him to be a sparrow. The poor thing was not breathing and I felt so saddened by it. I tried to breath (yeah, I know mouth to mouth with a bird, what's wrong with me?) life into the bird but he wouldn't take a breath.

I began to cry and it about broke my heart ...

When all of a sudden the bird fluttered to life and took to the sky.

That's all I remember...

(In real life, I've encountered many birds. Several hummingbirds have been trapped in our garage and I've rescued them. I took in a baby bird and failed to see it to adulthood. It died after a few short days. We have many bluebird houses around our spacious yard thanks to my husband. But birds are always around.)

April 19, 2012
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All non-lucid

I only glanced at my affirmation before turning out my light last night.



1. Peanut butter...I don't know more than that. I dreamed of various kinds of peanut butter. (I also made my daughter a PBJ sandwich for her lunch tomorrow, before I went to bed)

2. My cat had something trapped at the window. I went to the window and moved the curtain back and there was a little bird. Perhaps a wren or sparrow. Sparrow is more likely. It was all puffed up and crammed back in the corner of the window sill. I scooped it up expecting it to peck at me or something but it just rested in my hand. I hollered for someone to open the window and someone behind me did. I stuck my hand out and opened my fingers to let the little bird fly away but it just sat there. So, I moved it closer to the house - next to the outer wall. And at some point the bird morphed into a mouse. The mouse scattered down the side of the house and onto the ground. In the process it jumped from the wall to the ground and I watched it run away but I noticed it might have been limping. I also believe at one point a second bird flew out the window when the person lifted the sill. (reminds me of an older dream I had of the Lifeless Sparrow I found in the trash heap.)

3. This dream was very sketchy. I was in third person most of the time and it almost felt like an Remote viewing but I know I was not. There was this rather tall and large young man. He was in a basement. He'd come to see someone or maybe someone had come to see him. He had brownish hair - and needed a haircut, as it was a bit long to the collar. The girl who was there came to maybe his chin. She went to kiss him but at the last minute he turned his head and she kissed his cheek. It was an awkward moment. They chatted for a while. The dream gets fuzzy and then my husband enters the dream. Apparently they know each other, this guy and my husband. I'm not sure if I'm hiding from them because the entire dream feels very distant, like I stayed away and observed everything. I felt like I was hiding. Both my husband and this man went out to our driveway and began throwing a baseball back and forth. Then, I woke up.

When I was about 9-10, I used to have this recurring dream. I would be lying in a partially darkened room because I usually had a nightlight on somewhere or my blinds open. But at the time it seemed dark.

I would dream that I had fallen asleep (which I had) with my left arm hanging off the bed. I would wake and realize something was watching me. I knew it was behind the cracked door. So, I would stare at this space behind the door.

Out from behind this door, walked a black cat, with huge green eyes. I didn't have such a cat at the time. He would seem friendly and casually walk towards. When he was just beneath my arm, he would lunge and attack my arm.

I would wake up.

This dream occurred for months. It happened the same way, every time.

April 14, 2012
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Non-lucid
Fragments

Wrote my affirmation before bed in my dream journal: I remember and record my dreams upon waking.

[I woke several times from about 3am onward. Several dreams woke me, but I moved, and like smoke, the dream vanished. I figured out that I had to say something to bring myself into a waking stating so that I could remember and write. A few other times, I simply fell back to sleep. ;P After a few times of waking and not remembering once I moved, I decided to speak aloud and mentally recall my affirmation.]

1. A man I knew from High School was sitting on front porch steps with his Norwegian ex-wife and their daughter. She was very pretty - fair haired, light blue eyes, clear complexion. They were getting their picture taken and kept switching places.

-back to sleep-

2. [This one almost slipped away] Something about a guy. I was telling him to do something. I woke up and remembered what I told him and what we were doing - then I moved and forgot.

-back to sleep-

3. Seven Brides for Seven Brothers - an avalanche occurred and the eldest brother was taking the captured women back home. (I watched this movie the previous night.)

back to sleep-

4. Saw the Earth from space. Watched the Earth rotate. It was so beautiful and blue. Saw space...blackness.

-back to sleep-

5. I was in a hospital and I was giving an RN something (I knew as soon as I woke but as I moved to record this I forgot). She asked me, "Got anything new?" (Seriously? I give you a gift and you ask for something else?)

-back to sleep-

6. Someone [name was not even in my dream] on this forum was pointing to the dates in my older entries and saying, "Aren't you gonna have some new ones?" It was in a critical way.

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Side note: I'm not sure if this is just how dream recall develops as it's been so long, or whether my affirmation needs tweaking? Because waking about every 20 minutes to half hour was really annoying!

1983/82
Non-lucid/partial lucidness Dream
Memorable
Vivid
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After my Grandma passed away, I was very disturbed by her leaving this world. One night, I lay in bed and tried to imagine what she might be feeling - how would it feel to be 'dead'. With these thoughts in my mind, I fell asleep. As the dream began, I found myself swimming. It was probably a typical swimming pool. I tried to come up for air and found a see-through barrier preventing me from getting to the surface. I swam left and right to no avail.

The dream shifted. I believe I became conscious. I wondered how would one feel if they were dead? I began shutting down each of my senses. I figured one wouldn't be able to hear and then I could not hear. One would not be able to see and then I could not see anything but black. One would not be able to feel....and this is where it changed again. I felt cut off and isolated. I was floating (seemingly) in this blackness - all alone - without sight, without hearing, without feeling. I did not exist. No one worried about me. I had no worries but I had no joys either. And then...I became terrified. I wanted to mean something to someone. I wanted to be remembered. I wanted to feel and see and hear. I woke up.

*Afterthought: Looking back on this dream, I often wonder if I had not just gone to the void that I found after years of meditating? To a child, the void might seem terrifying especially if you don't know what it is. But when I found the void as an adult, it was peaceful. And because you are meditating and your focus is internal - not external - I don't hear anything, or feel anything, or think anything. I could have, if I'd wanted to. But the goal was to focus and clear the mind - clear them mind of all that is. Only after clearing the mind can one be able to hear other things and see other things. Before that you only hear what is yours to hear. ... your own noise. And if someone/something else was talking to you, you would never hear them above your own chatter. So, as a child, the void, if that is what I entered, was a nightmare. The unknown can be terrifying...

Old Dream from childhood....1980's (yeah, I'm OLD)

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My mother was driving my twin brothers and me somewhere at night. It was a dark two lane road and late. I felt really scared. All of a sudden the car breaks down and she tells us to stay in the car - she's going for help. She gets out of the car. Houses line the left side of the road. These houses are on a slight hill, but nothing that my mom can't climb. It's an easy grade. She heads toward the only house with a porch light on.

From the corner of my eye, I see dark figures sneaking up to her. I know they are after and stalking her. She starts to run and they chase her. I scream (and it comes out IRL). I open up the door and burst out of the car. I run toward my mother but she is already on the ground and the men are on top of her. They are holding her down and she is screaming. I am calling to her and trying to run. As I run, I pump my arms, willing myself faster. IRL I must have swung my arms too because I scraped my knuckles on my stucco wall and this woke me up. My knuckles were bleeding slightly and my dad was in my room. He apparently heard me scream.

April 12, 2012
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Wrote affirmation in my dream journal: I am open to exploring new worlds and remember my dreams upon waking.

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Fragment: Something about MASH the TV show. I remembered it after I'd already woken up this morning and fallen back to sleep only then to realize I needed to get up immediately. So, I sort of forced myself awake. Nonetheless I still only recalled the 'theme'.

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Side Note: I began perusing through my old Astral Dynamics book and noticed a section on activating the chakras. Apparently, it is very common to have the Heart center go all spastic right before exiting the body. The last time I consistently meditated (year or more ago) I was doing energy work and activating/opening my chakras. My heart center had become so strong that I thought something was wrong. I even stopped my meditation and checked my pulse only to find it was not elevated. (which is what the book said would occur) It seems that if one can ignore this pounding and let go the next thing to occur is an OBE. I, obviously, was not able to let go. Bruce said it was very hard to ignore and the man was certainly right. Only mention this because I think that is what's occurring during my most recent meditation but in the base or abdomen chakra - which causes one to focus on sexual energy and distracts you. You're supposed to also ignore it and move on to the next center. Being completely out of practice, I focused on it and whammo - orgasm.

2010 (approx)

I fell asleep without doing my affirmations in my journal.

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My husband was flirting with me, and he touched my left side, below my ribcage. I cringed and pulled away because it hurt there. It felt like a really bad bruise. He placed his hand on my ribcage again, I said, no, don't that really hurts. He grabbed me by the arm and held me in place then forcefully began rubbing the tender spot beneath my ribs. As he rubbed harder his face contorted into this demonic face and he smiled an evil, malicious smile. I couldn't pull away and he continued rubbing, knowing it was causing me terrible pain.

I woke abruptly IRL and noticed my left side, below my ribcage was very sore. When I felt there, I noticed a lump - for real. I ended up seeing the doctor and found it was a Lipoma. Six months later, I had it removed.
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Afterthought: I am thinking that the activation of my chakras either sensitized the nerves here so that I felt it or it simply brought my attention to that area. Because during meditation my chakras (base, sacral, solar plexus, heart) were all throbbing away. I actually checked my pulse rate several times believing that my heart rate had increased, but it had not. My pulse was steady even though the beating inside me was very strong and insistent. The solar plexus centered chakra and the heart chakra are the ones that thundered away. Did this have an effect on my side? I don't know. Perhaps just coincidence.

June 15, 2007

Sitting in a church watching a big screen presentation. A lady to my left was very large and i was smooshed in the seat. She kind of moved toward me, or asked if I would move over, but I had no more room. So, I got up. I was about to leave. People were confessing to the minister in a makeshift confessional made out of cushions and pillows. (and I'm not Catholic)

I decided to leave. Went to exit door and had my children. I saw a bottle with fire coming out of the top - a dirty bomb! I ran for the other exit. I told someone in a pew that there was a fire or danger. All exits had bombs.

I think I got out??

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Saw a woman - blurry - at some point she attacked me! I had razor blades and cut her lower arm to make her let go. Then, I was on top of her and had control.

I woke up.

August 14, 2006
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My husband is not a believer in anything. But that night, as I had on other nights, would visualize each member of my family cocooned in white light.

I woke sometime in the night to Russ's bad dream sounds. He got up and left, went to the back room to sleep. I fell back to sleep and recall that I had strange dreams but not nightmares.

In the morning, I told him that I heard him moaning because he must have had a bad dream. I asked if he remembered what he was dreaming about. He said, he woke up because he felt a hand on his head. When he opened his eyes, a dark shadow figure stood in front of him and then faded out. He thought it was real, but realized his mind must have played tricks on him. I asked if he dreamt that . Said he was awake when he felt and saw the dark shadow. He said it had a hat, like a fedora and it stood near the doorway. He thought it was going to hurt us or him.

July 16, 2006
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Pelicans were boxed in - they weren't really trying to get out. On water - many pelicans. They would - or maybe just one - try to bite and nip.

Now, I'm in line for a psychology class. I had to sign in, but the class was full. Somehow I still got in.

The teacher took stairs multiple steps at a time, but he got winded and would pause. I would catch up, but then he'd begin again and I would be behind once more. He had blond hair and was male.

In part of this school (?), people were on gurneys. One woman in particular was on a gurney waiting to be operated on. Patients passed me in the hallway and I got the sense they were missing parts of 'themselves'. Perhaps from the operations? The woman suddenly jumped off the gurney and ran. I followed her but slower. She ran outside and found a gate or exit? Where she slipped into a type of drawer and was gone. A man - perhaps a security guard - chased after her but failed to capture her.

Then, I was in class at my desk. Both my desk and book were there but my chair was gone - it was missing. The teacher entered the classroom and I said, "While I think pretending to sit or acting like I was sitting would work, it might get painful." And then I asked for my chair back.

April 4, 2006
[Apparently I found an older entry than originally thought...]

There's a party inside a house - my house? Windows are open with screens. It's warm out. At some point I notice bees. Bees were getting in the house. I was alarmed - worried. I noticed bees on the ceiling, many bees. I got angry and scolded people because they allowed the bees to come in. people in the party seemed unaware of the bees. I think I was worried that the children would get stung.

Someone named, Patty, her husband, Joe, died. We went to my Aunt's house. Bugs were in the beds and on the floor. My grandma died again. She'd died once, but apparently, she wasn't really dead. Now, we had to have her funeral. Pap, my grandfather, called me and asked if we were coming. I said, I didn't think he was going to have a funeral because she'd already had one - it seemed a little awkward. Apparently, he was having the funeral.

So, I had to get a dress or maybe hose for the funeral. But I was swimming. My kids asked to swim. My daughter said, no, and then we were leaving. I got out of the pool and my brothers said they would meet us there. I think, along the way, a woman was in the road doing something. I offered to pull over so we wouldn't block traffic and she could finish what she was doing. (?) So I pulled over.

It was now a park like setting. I stayed in the car. A dog I had known, with his friends, came to my car window. I rolled the window down and he licked my face. His owners watched from afar.

Next scene, I find myself driving to the mall again in search of a dress or hose. The mall is HUGE! And the parking lot was too. I drove the wrong way and someone in the car, I guess, pointed that fact out. They also mentioned that if I kept driving, I'd hit those spikes and ruin my tires. I turned to avoid them and saw a police man. I didn't know how to get to where my brothers had parked at the mall, so I could meet them. The lot and mall were so big. The police officer said to pull off and he'd take me to the mall and the correct lot. (how did he know?) I did as he said.

As we walked people were following. I began limping as I had hurt my foot. Someone asked about it and I said I hurt it on the beach and stepped on something sharp. We were on steps going down, I think. Hubby came and woke me up.

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Fell back to sleep:

Dreamed a wasp flew at me and hit me in the face! Darn wasp!!!

September 21, 2008

Day 13
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I dreamed about a fire. A fire was set purposely to kill those inside a building. I escaped with others and found this building further away where everybody was. I thought this place was safe. I saw the fire coming toward this new building and told the people to leave - to get out. I ran for another building, but I had to sneak for if the bad guys saw us they'd kill us. I ended up in a building with African American kids. At one point, i was in a hotel in the halls.


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Knife stabbing. There was a fight over a girl. She went down.

September 20, 2008

Day 12
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Dreamed a big spider ran up the wall and hid behind the curtain. Hubby got it with his bare hands. Could see it in his hands Took it outside. When he returned, I asked if he killed it. He did.

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Dreamed about lumps on my arm - forearm.