MadamAurantia

Hmm. The first one involved visiting a city on an island, but unfortunately the island was raised (and balanced, eek) on a stone pillar a couple of hundred feet in the air. I decided not to visit, as I get vertigo and am scared of heights in my dreams. So I took the giant climbing rope with which people were supposed to visit, and played ultimate rope swing with it. Wheeee! I woke from a delicious sense of freefall.

Second and third, don't remember. I've been sleeping in 2-3 hour shifts, had several over the last couple of days. I just can't keep track of everything, can I?

Last sleep, I dreamed that I was attending a CLC church (nightmare fuel, for my mind: no good memories there) lunch before a big service, with my parents, my husband's grandmother, and my granddad. BTW, Granddad's still dead IRL. Grandma-in-law's still alive and awesome. My dad did something I can't remember, but I was so offended that I told him I didn't want to see him in public anymore today and I left.

Next thing I know, Dad's driving me towards the big house that my husband and I just bought. While I was getting offended at CLC, my husband and our two future-cohabitants were getting all moved in. I was going home, but Dad keeps "missing" the house. He drives past it over and over and over, until in anger I get out of the car in a traffic jam (road is somehow full of RVs) and try to walk there. But now, it's suddenly on a 50 foot high plateau. Somehow I'm not bothered by the heights, and begin to climb with no trouble whatsoever up the cliffs. I get about halfway up, and wake up.

This is very odd to me. IRL, I'm almost never this angry with my father. Since I started journaling, my mother finally left my mind and now Dad seems to be taking her place of sadism. Why???

The two high goals remind me of a common theme in my subconscious: staircases. There is often a staircase, a long one, that I can never master. I've had missing stairs that couldn't be passed, endless stairwells, vertigo, and moving stairs throwing me off. A rope ladder is another climbing tool, and this time I simply dropped the goal and enjoyed the ride. Once I became angry and determined enough, I could scrap the stairs completely and make it up without trouble. I've made it to the top once, years ago, and what I found I'm still unready to discuss.