non-lucid

Dream set in some very ancient looking catacombs.

I had to travel over a lake of frozen ice to get there, but the ice was so thin that it was cracking. I had to run faster and faster as the cracks appeared under my feet, trying to avoid plunging into the water.

I am with some woman called Evelyn, and she looks like a cross between Morena Baccarin and Katherine Heigl. She seems to have lost her husband to some disease and is looking for his tomb. When she finds it, she lays down in it, and his ghost comes to her. He is real enough to be touched and heard. He keeps telling her to shush, like he is nervous to be discovered. Evelyn is overly emotional though and making too much noise, drawing her current boyfriend to the scene. He is dressed (or rather un-dressed) like the God Pan, which is rather strange, but no one comments on it. He is the caretaker of the catacomb, and he's not pleased that the ghosts are active.

We - the kids, me and my husband - are going out for dinner to a restaurant. The kids I have are the same as my kids in real life, but my husband looks like an old broken down version of The Architect from The Matrix. There is a general feeling of stress about our venture to the restaurant. I don't remember eating, I just remember me and the hubby having a big fight and being really bitchy with each other.

It's late and the kids are miserable, crying loudly. People in the restaurant are looking at us. I can't get one of my boys off the ride 'em toy car that they have in the restaurant to amuse children. The husband is getting more and more angry, more and more impatient. It doesn't help when I tell him I intend to get my horse. Part of the reason we came to this restaurant is that you can take a horse with you after you're done your meal. Kind of like a blockbuster but with horses and a meal involved. The husband is not impressed, and since he can't drive the car home (he has no license), he growls that he will take the kids and walk home, meeting me later. It's not too far from here, so I agree. He stomps off in a huff.

I rush over to the corral part of the restaurant and go about picking my horse. I grab the first one I can find, she's kind of a caramel colour with a long light coloured mane that she tosses around, whinnying loudly. I bring her up to the lady at the "check out", feeling stressed. I want to get out of here as soon as possible, so that grumpy husband doesn't beat me home.

The lady at the till has long tightly curled frizzy hair and she looks at me and the horse dubiously. She asks me why I took this horse. I say that I chose her because she's spirited and full of energy, like me (). The lady takes her from me, saying that this horse is a bit too young and wild, that she will bring me a more appropriate horse. I am guessing she means for my noobish level of horse riding. The horse bites her as she is lead away from me, and that pleases me a little, giving me a feeling that maybe the horse chose me, too.
They bring me a very calm horse who almost looks a bit like a donkey. He's dark brown and black mixed fluffy fur. She tells me he will suit me better. I'm stressed now, it feels like this is taking too long, so I agree and we head off to the car.

On the way to the car, I tell the lady about my relationship troubles, illustrating the problems I have had in the past. She doesn't seem to care. I try to impress upon her how dire the situation is with my hubby, but she just feigns interests, but not convincingly. We get to the car (which is a mini van kind of thing) and I see a load of garbage all along the floor of it. Embarrassed, I search through the garbage for my keys. I find them after some stressed minutes. As I look at the keys I notice that the car keys are missing, so hubby has taken them! This irritates me, for some reason to do with the fact that he has no license. In my dream he has taken the car to drive home, but that makes no sense because the car is in front of me.

Now that I am apparently ready to go, The horse lady showed me what to feed my horse. She pulls out this thing that looks like a sandwich. She asks if I have seen these before and I say I think I have but I couldn't ever afford to buy them before. She shows me that when you break the sandwich apart there are whole foods inside, like vegetables, fruits, and noodles. She says I must feed him only these. She begins showing me some long drawn out demonstration of another snack to feed him, and I try to pay attention, but I am so stressed now and really want to get going. I am sure that hubby is at home waiting to yell at me now.

The dream ends when my kids wake me up. How disappointing, I was so close to riding that horse!

I have memories of three fragmented dreams, all rather random...

Fragment 1

All I can remember is I'm out in the middle of the woods, at some log cabin home where this hippy type man and woman live. They are drug dealers, apparently. The man takes my passport and makes a break for it in his station wagon (complete with wood panel!) I chase after him, crying, panicked.

Fragment 2

I'm in an Indian themed love hotel searching for someone

Fragment 3

I'm lost in a labyrinth of underground train and subway tunnels. I keep changing trains trying to find my way, but it just gets me more and more hopelessly lost. I ask for help but no one can help me or understand me. I eventually find my ex (he's wearing this strange crepe type white shirt that has a 'stylishly' ripped V neck. He's laughing and nervous because he's lost and confused too.

I feel like I've had this dream before, and it's a strange one...

The main character of the dream is Tom Hanks, mostly - and I am watching him as an omnipresent viewer. At one point he appears to morph into Will Smith, but for the most part, it's Mr. Hanks all the way.

Mr. Hanks is trying to flee some evil foe, but it's fairly easy for him, seeing as he has a special jet pack that employs the use of helicopter blades over top of it to facilitate its flying. Unfortunately, whilst trying to escape said unnamed foe, Tom is forced to fly up through the roof of a house. It's the only way out. The good news is the blades chop easily through the roof and he escapes. The bad news? His blades are now hopelessly damaged. He must find replacement blades, and soon!

Tom goes about his desperate search to find new blades. In his mission he comes across and evil Chinese Businessman (who looks just like Chairman Mao), who is intent on destroying a subdivision of houses with his massive backhoe. Innocent people are getting in the way, trying to thwart the efforts of evil antagonist. Being the heartless and cruel man he is, the businessman just runs right over the innocent residents, killing them in droves, so that his demolition can continue! Tom discovers that the bodies of the slain are being cleverly formed in clay, taking the shape of classic Greek statues to disguise them. They are then sold off to fund the demolition project.

Tom feels he must stop this evil man, but he is helpless without the aid of his trusty jet pack! Oh, the horror!

So that dream ended and lead into another one in which I am a celebrated author, writing a book about Eels. Unfortunately I don't remember all of that one.

I'm on a break from thinking too much about LDing. This has made my dreams easier to remember, perhaps because there is less pressure on my brain.

Just like in real life, I am sick and laying down to rest on the bed. It's my same bed, but it's in the flat I had with my ex, near Berlin. Or at least, I recognize it as such, but this flat is actually much more beautiful and expensive looking.

My ex is in the other room, with him are two of his friends, both of whom I know from when we lived in Vancouver. I get up to go out, passing through a room/hallway that has my ex's computer in it. It's on. I glance at the screen and see some form of Messenger running - though it's not MSN. On it are active conversations from other friends of his in Vancouver. They all appear to be congratulating him and the two friends that are visiting, wishing them all the best and lots of fun. It doesn't say so, but I gather that my ex and his two friends are going to move in together. I wonder to myself if it will be here in Germany, or in Ireland, where he is living in RL now. I briefly wonder why he is back in Germany again.

I move to the next room. They are talking and laughing loudly, but go quiet when I enter. Awkward. I am looking for something healthy to eat, as I am not feeling well. All I can find is a big paper bag full of all kinds of junk food. They all freak out when I find it, and I tell them to relax, I don't want their stupid crap food. Not finding anything, I leave the room. My ex follows me.

In the room with the computer again, my ex immediately notices that his screen has been scrolled. He looks worried and slightly angry, asking me if I read his conversation. I say "Why would I want to read your conversation?" and look away. He seems to believe me. I feel guilty for lying.

Flash now to one of his friends questioning me - he's asking me if my ex and I are getting back together, or "kissing and making up" as he calls it. I look at him like he's nuts and tell him as much, saying that's the last thing I want. I can tell my ex's friend is just asking to make sure it's a safe bet to move in with him, but I'm not supposed to know so I stay quiet.

Feelings: confusion, guilt, bitterness, alienation, a feeling of jealousy when looking around the nice flat

My kids kept waking me up last night with small annoying noises. In effect those sounds kept disrupting my dreams, and I would go in and out of sleep, never conscious enough to fully recall anything.

Fragment 1

Image of Tyra Banks in a floor length hooded black robe. Very Eyes Wide Shut.

I was listening to the Dream Controller App, which has a voice repeating in your ear "This is a dream" over the course of the night. How frustrating that the sound of that voice got into my dream, yet did not have the desired effect:

Fragment 2

I was trying to explain to someone a machine that says 'This is a dream' at the touch of a button. It seemed very important that they understand it.

Last night was really disappointing for recall. I only have 3 tiny fragments. I contemplated not even putting them in here, but as per Stephen LaBerge, apparently I must record everything.

Fragment 1

I had this vision (eyes open) of my son falling out of his highchair, so I grabbed for him in a panic. It turned out it was just my man's knees (bent so his feet were placed flat on the mattress) moving under the covers. He looked at me like I was nuts as I explained I thought his legs were our son falling from a highchair. But that's not unusual for him to look at me that way - he knows I do crazy things in my sleep

Fragment 2

My Step Dad was farming something in a field. I don't remember what it was, but it was something very unusual - something inanimate/not alive. I was questioning him as to what the heck he was doing.

Fragment 3

No real details about this one, except knowing that my Brother in Law was in it, and I had a definite feeling of awkwardness/discomfort. No idea what was going on there.

Fragment 1

A strange dream about people just sitting in their highchair like things, facing me, touching their index fingers together like my 9 month old does.
Something falls down from a tray in front of one of them... Is that my son?

Fragment 2

A woman trying to park her car in a steep parkade. It's a tiny parkade, very tightly parked cars. She pulls in too close to the wall on the right side and pushes back (and squishes) her side mirror

Yet Another Wedding

Now I'm shopping for wedding dresses. I don't know what possesses me to try on the one with banana print, I think it's cheap and I have a feeling I am on a really tight budget. I'm horrified at how ugly it is, and how ugly it looks on me. I am even more horrified and upset when I get something on it! I try to get it off, but when I scratch the stain with my nail it turns darker. Panic!

I'm in a taxi and going to a club with a friend and her boyfriend. We're talking. When we arrive he goes up to get drinks from the bar during our conversation about going out. He says as he's walking away from us that when he's upset or angry with his girlfriend, he goes out to the club. He smiles as he stops for a second and says "When I'm upset you know I'm not so Bo-Bo". Then he continues to the bar for the drinks. I know what he means by the statement. Bo-Bo is his name (but not as in the clown), and he means when he's angry or upset he turns into a bit of a sleaze bag, but usually he's a nice guy. I notice his girlfriend has no expression concerning this statement.

He and I are talking. He is slow dancing with his girlfriend in front of me while I sit on a couch. I tell him I go out when I'm upset too, but that it doesn't matter, I don't get into trouble because I'm so average looking. He asks me something which I don't really remember, then makes a comment, something like "Your boyfriend loves you for who you are, which is not average. If wanted or lusted after rake thin girls, he could go f**k something with sharp edges, like a book." - He gave two other examples of things with sharp edges but I can't remember them.

Fragment 3

Random flash of a some guy - sales guy or bartender? He has a tattoo on his neck, it's a year.. 1100 something. I tell him it's a funny that my son was born that year too.

Side notes:
I think that the Mugwort is helping me remember my dreams. Glad I ordered more of it.
Perhaps one of my dream signs is Weddings, that's two this week. I'm not getting married nor engaged so it's not like it's on my mind.
I think one other dream sign may be Bars or Clubs. I have had a few set in a Bar/Club now.

I don't know which factor it was this time that helped me remember my dream. I made a few changes this time. I woke up to a gentle alarm at 1am and again at 5am. I had one planned for 3am but I guess I didn't set it, or I turned it off in my sleep (I do that sometimes ).
Also this time I drank some Mugwort tea before bed, and chose to leave out the brainwave and subliminal message apps, sleeping au natural so to speak.

Dream 1 - Fragment

I don't remember this one really, just a vague recollection of living in something similar to the Jersey Shore house () and feeling really overwhelmed with the drama. I remember a distinct feeling of being sick of trying to take care of all of the people in the house.

Dream 2 - Much more interesting - My Indian Wedding on the Día de los Muertos

I have the feeling that this dream was quite long, but I only clearly remember the end of it.
I have dark skin, eyes and hair, which feels a bit strange to me as in life I am quite pale. In my head I reconcile with the fact that I am Indian and then think nothing more of it.

There is another woman with me, a fairly young, yet older than me, professional whom I know to be a plastic surgeon. She is mentoring me, training me to be as brilliant as she is, or at least I get the feeling she is headhunting me to do a fellowship with her.
I seem to have fallen out of favour with her scientific mind because of my faith in some Catholic type religion. At this point I become aware of the surrounding environment and "feel" of the place I am in. It's close to what I have seen on documentaries for the Mexican Day of the Dead. I notice there are red rose petals everywhere too - in the air and all over the ground. I feel like I am in some sort of temple room. I feel like this is a wedding, more specifically, my wedding.

We are purifying me for the holy sacrament, I am fully dressed and draped in beautiful fabrics, cleansed. The professional woman comes to me and kneels beside me, moving the red cards that are scattered there on that specific spot on the floor. I know those red cards are there to represent evil. I sense her disapproval, but I am surprised that she quotes some scripture to me. She purifies herself and then tells me that she plans to adopt me so that I may avoid immigration issues when I come to study with her in Canada.
Then the sound of my alarm.

I would be writing it here.

Man, I am pissed off. I had such a good experience with that first WILD I attempted, felt like I got pretty far and was excited to try again. But these last nights I am getting nothing.. I know I am dreaming but I have little to no recall. I wake up just remembering the barest of fragments, not even enough to write two sentences with. When I attempt WBTB, I fall asleep every time

It's like that one episode was this wonderful shining oasis in a desert, and now I'm dying of thirst again. I know I must be patient, but it's SO not one of my virtues!

Me thinks I needs meh a new technique... or... something.

On a side note, lower doses of B6 (50mg) seem to be working better. No night terror last night. Woot!

I read on here that Vitamin B6 can make your dreams more intense. I thought it couldn't do any harm to try it, maybe it would even help me get lucid in some small way.

So far it's been a bad idea for me. I sometimes have these bad night terrors, usually combined with sleep walking (or sleep running and screaming as is the case for me), and since I haven't had any recently, it never occurred to me that Vitamin B would have any effect on them. Ya... WRONG!

Two nights now after taking it I have had intense and horrible terrors. They always end with me shooting out of bed to run down the hall in a panicked scream. So I don't think I'll be taking it again