Schmaven's Dream Journal of Randomness

Very interesting colors and shapes swirl around as my whole experience for a bit. Then I decide to go to a class I hadn't attended in a while. Some sort of English class, I'm not really sure what it is about yet. But most of the term has passed, and I think it's a good time to check in and see what's going on. I walk into the classroom, filled with college kids, and am warmly greeted by the teacher. I'm flattered she is so nice, considering I haven't been to any of the classes until now.

I look for my seat, but get a strong urge to use the bathroom, so I step out for a brief break so I can focus better. I go down a hall, and see a stairway. Two people are in the stairway, discussing where the bathroom might be. They don't know, and neither do I. Instead of following them, I trust my intuition, and go a different route, pretty confident that they will also find a bathroom in time.

I try to go down another stairway, but run into a large group of people, all walking slowly, carrying their book bags and talking to one another. I make my way past them, turn down another hall, and see a urinal at the end. It is strange that there are no doors to the bathroom. It looks to be a room that the janitors must use for something. I go up to the urinal, and am surprised to see that it is actually a sink, with a faucet at the top, and a urinal basin for the bottom.

I don't want to pee in the sink! So I look around and spot a toilet right next to it. I set something valuable down on top of the urinal/sink, and relieve myself in the toilet, keeping careful watch down the hall in case someone comes this way. Two people turn the corner, so I stop peeing out of respect for their sensibilities, mostly relieved so I'm okay, and go to wash my hands. One of the people goes to use the toilet, and I worry about splash back on my item I put on the urinal, but try not to worry about it.

Suddenly, I'm misted by a blast of water spraying from some unseen source. Ah, this must be the hand washing water... I wash my hands in it, careful to let some water pass behind me and not to block the entire jet of water so the people behind me can have some too. But they are more annoyed that I'm washing my hands in that water than anything.

Alright, I better get back to class now. But I'm lost. I have no idea where I am. All I know is that my class room was on the second level of a massive bridge connecting two large buildings to one another. It must be B-Wing. I try to back track my steps and end up outside the building. I know I didn't go outside to get here, but it is sort of familiar, and I think I can get there this way just as well as the other way.

Walking around the building, I approach a large group of people just relaxing outside, laying in the sun, happily talking amongst themselves. There are a few builders taking a break on the hill, eating their food and enjoying the sun right next to the stairs up to B-Wing. I can nearly see my class room through the doors atop a few tall flights of outside stairs leading up to the bridge area. To my right is a goat with long blonde hair, and a rather human like face. She says hi to me, then starts talking to the builders. I'm not sure if this goat/woman speaks English, or if I can understand goat language really well. I am a goat whisperer after all.

No time to ponder that now, I'm late for class. So I walk past all this, shoot a quick smile at goat/lady, and approach the stairs. As soon as I take my first step on the stairs, I get that heavy leg thing. My legs feel like they each weigh 100 more pounds, plus like they're bungee corded to the ground, and are now unresponsive to usual motor control. It takes all my effort and focus to move just one foot up to the next step. There are many steps to go, so I use all my focus and concentration to consciously move my legs to get me up the steps in a timely fashion. My automatic movement part of the brain seems to have turned off for some reason, so all of the motion is now conscious motion.

It seems like it has taken so much time to climb the stairs that the class must surely have ended by now. But I push on anyway to prove to myself that I can overcome this obstacle, and also because the teacher might still be there so I can talk with her. Is it an English type of class?

/// I interpret this as I know the next steps to take in life, but they're hard. Although no matter how difficult they are to take, I can do it, and there's something important to be learned once I've taken these steps. Also, if I weren't so distracted by bathroom things, I could have learned what I needed to by now. Focus!

I am sitting alone in a big apartment complex, listening to the rain pitter patter on the roof. It's night time, and I'm not sure what to do really. I faintly hear a knocking outside, but it's not at my door. I consider ignoring it, but decide to see who it is, since it is raining outside, and someone might need some help.

I go outside, and around the building to the front side of it about 100 ft around the corner and see that it was my spiritual guide knocking at the door. I got the impression he was trying to offer me a ride. He is now just about at his car, and about to drive away. I run up to him before he leaves, and tell him that I'd like a ride.

Once I get in the car, my good friend from school is now the driver, and it is day time. We're on a snowy mountain road, driving faster than I would drive given the conditions. There is a narrow band of dry road that is totally safe, but on each side is a slippery mix of snow and ice. My friend turns a corner too sharply, dipping into the slippery area, and the car spins off the road. Now air born, we are falling toward an icy river that looks really unpleasant. I see a snow bank just below, and think how nice it would be if we landed there instead.

We do! The front of the car sinks deep into the snow bank, far enough that we have to use the rear doors to get out. As soon as we get out and climb away a little, the snow gives way, and the car falls into the icy water below. As soon as it splashes in, I see my spiritual guide again next to me, with his lower robes all wet like he had been playing in the water just now.

I am playing Dwarf Fortress, and mix with the game a little as I micro-manage the Dwarves to build an epic tower defense style entrance to their underground Fortress. It should be impenetrable! But I have to meet my friend A for coffee before I go to work.

I drive to the coffee shop on the North end of town in a white pickup truck, keenly aware that I don't have much time before I have to go to work, in the opposite part of town. I don't see her as I arrive, so I park in one of the open spaces and get out. There are little Dwarves around me, and a large wooden post next to the truck. I tie the truck to it with a rope as the Dwarves climb over the rope, the post, and the truck. Seems normal. Then the truck next to mind pulls away, and gets stuck on something, pivots substantially, and puts a big dent in the side of my truck.

Ignoring the dent, I still don't see any sign of my friend, so I go into the coffee shop. Immediately, some people ask me to participate in a study. I recognize most of them from when I was involved in the same study earlier. I was an auditor, checking in on their work, and never found out exactly what it was they were doing. Out of curiosity, I agree to participate. I thought I saw needle marks on some of the other participants, even though no needles were involved, so it seems like they have something to hide.

Assuring me that they just need to do a couple blood tests, a strong guy literally picks me up off the ground by my left arm and carries me down the hall. I would've walked, so I let him carry me. Then I suspect that perhaps the reason for this treatment is because what they are going to do to me should make me want to run away. I struggle to break free, but he is ridiculously strong. All my struggling has puffed out my arm veins. He stabs a big needle into my main bicep vein, and quickly draws blood out of me. I conclude that this all was just a very efficient method to get blood samples, and I relax.

I overhear a few scientists talking about one girl who they gave an injection to earlier. She has turned into some sort of monster, and is very dangerous. They have her barricaded in one of the lower levels of this building, about two floors below us. They then tell me that as part of this study, I must feed her, and they hand me a brown tray with a few unappealing plates of food on it. Apparently, she has killed all the guards, and everyone else who has gone near her. Great...

Making my way down to her floor, through some sturdy doors, and down some big stairways, I see her at the end of an abandoned hallway. Several open rooms are on either side of the hall, with no one in them. Some doors open, some closed. Blood, debris, and trash is strewn all over the floor and walls. It looks like a massacre. ...Quietly, I walk up to her from behind as she is hunched over a dead guy wearing a white lab coat. It looks like she's eating his flesh. I poke her gently in the back with the food tray to get her attention. With twitchy reflexes, she turns to face me abruptly, her cheeks and mouth covered in blood and weird black slime. Letting out a low growl, she begins to turn her body to face me as well as if she's getting ready to pounce like a cat. Basically, she's one of those scary fast zombies now...

Dropping the tray at her feet, I turn and run as hard as I can down the hall back the way I came. I hear her approach, but don't dare look back as even the slightest hesitation might be the edge she needs to catch me. I dart to my right into an open room, and close the door, locking it faster than I thought possible. A sturdy wooden door, with a very narrow window, I feel safe now.

Smashing the door right through the frame, she jumps into the room after me. I back away, and jump over a bed, putting it between her and I. She slowly walks up toward me, and climbs onto the bed. Laying down on her side facing me, she begins to speak normally. She tells me of how she no longer needs to have sex to reproduce. Having been discouraged by many males' eagerness to have sex, and concerned about that, she gave it up in favor of killing people to reproduce instead. Somehow it works for her. Almost on queue, I jizz in my pants. Yes, just like that SNL skit... "Well, now I especially am in the position to get killed by her!" I think, as I try to stay on my feet.

I put my hand on her shoulder to comfort her, and am teleported to a river in the middle of the night. I am positioned precariously on a steep snow bank, that is rapidly being dissolved into this raging river. I try to climb out, but the snow is too wet and slides down the bank, nearly taking me into the river with it. It all turns to slush around me.

With a few steps, I leap across the 10 ft river, onto the opposite snow bank that looks like its in better shape, and try to climb out of that side. The top of this one is crusty snow, and large chunks of it break off, falling over my head as I try not to fall with them into the frigid rapids right behind me. However, I have no other choice but to try, so I make another leap for the edge, only to have it break away, sending me falling backwards into the river.

Now looking down on the river from up in the sky, I see that I have died, and my body is being carried by the currents downstream. I watch as it floats along. Then it is carried to a Dwarven Fortress that is harnessing the water for some sort of industry. They fish my body out of the water and pass it to the medics to see if they can revive me. I watch as they try, and then conclude that I have died.

I re-materialize in front of the coffee shop again, having just parked the truck. This time there is a parrot on the post that I have tied the truck to. The parrot criticizes me on many levels. The parrot seems to have been emboldened by being let out of its cage. I let it criticize me, not really caring, because soon I must deal with the demon girl. I warn the parrot of this girl, and how the parrot himself should be careful - as she is very quick. I perceive images in my mind of the girl transforming into her demon form after being a cat, then a demon cat, in various stages of development.

I realize that time is not linear as we normally perceive it, and get in the truck to drive to work.

Trapped in a small gray chamber, about the size of an average living room, but made entirely of stone and metal. I look up and see that this room has no ceiling, but instead a giant shaft, hundreds of feet tall with an opening to the sky, presumably to let a little bit of light in, which it does. There is a wide passageway down some rubble to a dead end room about the same size of what I'm in, and another hallway on the opposite side. I look down that hallway to see if I can get out, but my view is blocked by a man in full medieval plate armor, carrying a medium length sword with a 3 inch wide blade. He roars at me, and charges. Terrified, I run the opposite direction, and am cornered in the dead end room. I face the man, just as he rams the sword through my chest. Leaving it in me for a few moments, he pulls it out, and I crumple to the ground. All I can see are his steel boots as he stands above me, watching me writhe in pain before I die.

Having died, I appear again in the same chamber. I look for how to get out, and see the swordsman again. Seems kind of familiar. I feel like he is hostile as he again starts to charge in my direction, so I run again. Cornered, I try to dodge his sword strikes, get a major cut in my shoulder, then am stabbed through my gut. It feels like being really sick with food poisoning, but combined with a lot of burning. I fold over forward and he cuts my head off.

Re-appearing in the same chamber as before, I wonder if I can get out this time. But quickly the swordsman appears again and chases me into the dead end. This time I attack him, but have no weapons other than my fists. I dodge his strike, and punch him in the metal face shield, breaking my fist on his helmet. Ignoring the pain, I punch him more, but he doesn't seem to be phased at all by this as he slashes me in the side. I go to block his second strike with my forearm, but his swing cuts clear through my arm, decapitating me.

Having just died, I find myself in the same room as before, but this time I remember the previous encounters and ready myself. I conclude that he will kill me no matter what I try, and there is no escape. He has been coming from a dead end hallway somehow, so there is no where to go. I think about how he's probably done nice things in the past, and bring to mind feelings of warmth and closeness to him, like he is my best friend from all time. I even wish for him and everyone to be happy. A blissful tingling feeling starts at the base of my spine, then rises to the top of my head, then back down, and out to my arms. It feels amazing, but I focus more on loving this swordsman than getting distracted by this feeling.

The swordsman approaches again, but this time I do not run. I stand and face him. I can't help but smile, happy to see him. He kneels down, lowers his sword, and rams it through my foot, the long way, all the way through, splitting my toes in half, cutting through the bone, and going all the way out the heel end of my foot. I am briefly distracted by the searing pain as I fall to the floor in front of him. Remembering my love from before, the pain disappears, but he quickly withdraws the sword and slays me once again. This time I wake up.

There are no cars on the road. In fact, it seems to be completely abandoned. A little ways ahead, I see a silver rainbow starting in a cloud, and ending right on the road, but with a more slide type shape to it, starting out shallow, steepening, then ending with a shallow slope. I approach it and watch a group of clouds peacefully drift up above. I teleport to one of the clouds that is about as big as me, and float in it for a little bit. Then I use it as a sort of raft, and ride it down the silver rainbow like a water slide. Some condensation from the cloud and the rainbow gets my face a little moist, and it feels rather cool, but the rush of air blowing past me as I slide down dries it just as fast as it gets me wet. I do this a few times, choosing different clouds for each go, just softly going for rides. At the bottom, the clouds float me back up to the top automatically.

Wandering around a busy party at someone's house, my friend and I sit down at a table. Someone brings us both a beer. After just half of it, I feel pretty tipsy and get up to walk around. Upstairs, I find the bathroom, but instead of a toilet, there is a large pond, with urine instead of water, and two people on hover crafts racing around a small island in the center. I relieve myself, and do my best not to pee on the hovercraft racers, even though they nearly splash me with urine as they zoom past.

I go back downstairs and see a strange looking animal outside. It has the body of a vicious wolf, but the legs of a gazelle, and it doesn't know how to use the legs very well. It is quite slow, and looks like it is going to fall over. I watch as it goes from house to house looking for scraps to eat. Touched by its predicament of not being able to find any food, I ask my friend if he has anything I can give it. He gives me a piece of his sandwich. I go outside, and walk right up to the wolf-gazelle (Gazzolf / Wolfzelle?) and poke it in the rear leg to get its attention. I practically shove the food in its face, then put the food down next to it before running back to safety. The Gazzolf beats me to the door, and begs for more food. Out of no where, I pull a massive pile of food out of nothing and give it to the Gazzolf who chows down happily.

Going back inside, I learn that my friend is the target of an assassination. I too am a potential target. He has taken off to safety, leaving me in his room where the assassins are approaching. I am given an optional task of securing files from his MP3 player by uploading them to a public server where everyone can access them, thereby protecting them from being destroyed. I just want to run, but feel that this would be very helpful. Even though I am unfamiliar with the software involved, I make it happen, focusing with all my might so I can get it done before the assassins get here. I notice a few suspicious characters that look like ninjas approaching from the fields outside, sneaking toward the house at a dead sprint.

Running out of the room, I sense someone is just about to break through the window. I close the door and run downstairs to find my friend armed with a gun, pointing it right at me. I tell him I'll help him, and not to shoot me. Walking around the corner, I see a ninja, so I telepathically tell my friend, "There's one around the corner to your right." As the ninja turns the corner, my friend pre-fires him, shooting him immediately. I check out another nearby room and see another ninja, so I again tell my friend telepathically, "Behind you, another one with two swords." My friend again turns and shoots him before the ninja gets a chance to surprise him.

Walking along a sidewalk in Germany, I'm trying to find my hotel room. The whole time, I am squirting a bottle of crack sealant into the sidewalk cracks with precision accuracy as a way of keeping track of where I've been so I don't get lost. I tell myself Hansel and Grettle did it, so it must be an effective method. I miss the street I should turn down, and the road enters some magical woodlands. Vibrant green trees everywhere, and a field filled with puff balls - white and gold. I wish I had a camera, but instead, burn the image into my mind before turning back.

Distracted by the crack sealant, I miss the turn again, and as I continue, the road takes me into a deserted desert town, with dry earth cracked all around me, and sand blowing in the hot afternoon under a very strong sun. I've definitely gone too far now, so I turn back again and go back up the road, still squirting crack sealant along the sidewalk so I don't get lost...

My friend and I go into a bar with a monk we both know. My friend orders a sandwich and a few drinks. I look up at the menu, but can't read it clearly because I haven't done my eye exercises. I look back and the monk has disappeared, no where to be found. I look up at the menu again, trying to decide what to get as I wait for someone to come back to the counter to let me order. I decide I'll just get whatever is in the top left corner, I don't really care what it is.

As the cashier comes back, a group of people come into the bar and cut in front of me. A few of them give their order, then I step in front to place mine next. A really tall strong guy shoves me aside telling me he's next in line. I tell him "I was here first"
"Do you want to fight about it?" He asks.
"I don't want to fight" I tell him, and just walk over to the other cash register where no one is in line at all. I look back and see the big guy air boxing, throwing some really hard punches that look like they would kill me.

Another guy comes over to this second cash register and shoves me aside asking, "Do you think you could beat me up?"

Even though I'm pretty sure I could beat him up, I tell him, "No, you're stronger than I am, there's no way I could beat you up". Before I can finish my sentence, he puts his finger in my mouth. I'm really tempted to bite down on it really hard, but don't really want to get into a fight, so I just wait a few seconds and he takes it out. Then he starts calling me all kinds of mean names, trying to make me mad and start a fight.

Ignoring his taunts, I place my order, "Whatever is in the top left of your menu up there" as I point to the hanging menu. Loud music has replaced the two men who were trying to fight me, and it is hard to speak loud enough to order. The cashier then tries to give me a bunch of chicken, fried chicken patties, and other types of chicken. I don't really want it, but accept two of them anyway.

My friend hasn't gotten his sandwich yet, so I go over to join him as we wait for our food.

In a small room with a monk, surrounded by tough looking men armed with flails, I don't know what to expect. I too have a flail, but the monk is unarmed, sitting down at the table with 5 glasses of tea and water of varying sizes. There is a big cup, a mug, a shot glass, a regular cup and a tiny glass. Apparently, the men are waiting for us to pay them in exchange for the release of some children they are holding in captivity.

The monk tells them, "I must first drink 5 glasses" and proceeds to drink from the large cup. Then he pulls me close and whispers, "When you see me get the children, attack them with your flail, but run to follow me once I've gotten far enough away with the children". Still holding me close like he is going to say something else, he remains silent for a few moments. I feel like this is a suicide mission, but don't mind because it will save the children.

Finishing the 5 glasses, he begins to sign a check as the armed men look on eagerly. One of them quickly snatches it away when he finishes signing it, and they all begin to push us both out of the room. No sign of the children anywhere, it seems like they had no intention of freeing them in the first place, and now might just try to kill us.

I walk into an auditorium in the middle of a performance, but turn around to find a more subtle way out. The men with flails slowly walk toward us like some sort of wall of death - slow, but certain. We exit out the front door, run down some stairs and jump over a bush. Seeing our car in the parking lot, we run to it, and squeeze through a gap in the chain link fence.

Speeding away from there, night quickly falls, and we find ourselves on a one way road that turns into a two way road. Swerving to dodge oncoming traffic, our car becomes a monorail train on a track, automatically piloted. Up ahead is a sharp 180 degree turn. I hold on as the train banks into it and quickly turns the corner.

Alarmed at so many mice all over the floor, a random army guy starts shooting at one of them. Satisfied, he walks off quickly. I look behind the chairs to see if the mice are okay back there. One of them looks injured, but none look dead. They are all tiny little baby mice, not much bigger than a fingernail.

Huge spiders are chasing all the baby mice, trying to eat them. I see a massive spider, holding a writhing baby mouse in its fangs scurry past me. The spiders' legs are thick and powerful looking, all covered in fur. About the size of a tarantula, but meaner and stronger looking. Well, the mouse problem doesn't seem like it will last for very long. I don't feel safe around these giant spiders though, so I walk out of the room.

The next room over, I see room mate struggling with some algebra problem involving food and supplement measurements, and the FOIL process. I show him the OIL part of it, then realize I forgot the F step. I try to explain that first step, but now it's completely over his head. I'm a little disappointed, because it's super easy, he just doesn't want to know how to do it.

I go into a different room, and cuddle with a girl on a couch. She is doing a FOIL problem correctly, and I'm happy to see someone get it. There is a TV on in front of us, but I don't even look at it or care what's on. I just notice the gentle blueish lights flickering on the screen like a strange lamp. Then I notice a giant spider on my left hand. It is a different kind than before. Thin spindly legs and a small body. Just really really long legs. I discretely move my hand behind the couch and fling it off. But it returns rather quickly, and is crawling over the girl's hair! I try to get it to crawl onto my hand by blocking it's path, but just as it takes a step onto my hand, she sees it, screams, and shakes. The spider is thrown through the air once again and we sit back down.

Visiting a monastery with my meditation teacher, someone mentions "The Sound of Angels". And then we hear it - a noise so high pitch that I don't actually hear it with my ears, but rather, I feel it in my head. Deafeningly loud, it pervades my whole perception of sound until that's all I experience. Then it stops, the maker of the noise pausing to take another breath before continuing. I join in with the noise making because I don't know what else to do really.

Everyone stops as a well respected woman is now inside another building, giving some rare advice. I open the door before I can really think much about it and see just one person sitting with her. This person is very nervous and doesn't look prepared to take the advice and use it, so I sit down with them. The woman has a hard time with English, but there is a book she is reading from that we all have a copy of. I gently read along with her to encourage her that she's pronouncing it right. We come to a spot where a bunch of pages are missing. Maybe 20 pages. My book has them all torn out, and so does her book. She looks at me, not knowing what to do next. I tilt my head back toward the heavens and start making "The Noise of Angels". The woman is astonished that I know how to do this, and I figure out from her that it is really rare to be able to make that noise. To me, it is like a cry; a wailing; not really very pleasant, and yet very calming at the same time...

The monks nearby join me in making the noise, and I appear to be the noise making leader at this point. For no other reason than I know how to make it easily. I do it as I breathe in and also as I breathe out, so I can sustain it with only minimal gaps during the transition of the breath. It also feels like I'm flexing my ear muscles in order to make it - the ones that affect your hearing and ear pressure.

My meditation teacher and Shiela start to talk about the noise. Apparently, ever since Shiela has discovered that it exists, she has found several movies about it and has not been bored since the discovery. I follow the two of them upstairs in a big house. Shiela turns off to go into her room, then my teacher turns to go into his room, leaving just me in the hallway. I see my friend D in the hallway. We smile and say hi. Seeing a bathroom, I realize I really have to pee. But it's the only one nearby, and I don't want to take it from D, so I leave in search of another. At the top of the stairs, I see a rather exposed bathroom. Waist high walls, and a shelf that makes it really hard to tinkle into the drain because I can't get very close. I try anyway, using my precision accuracy I've developed with the tinkle cannon, but part way through, get a feeling that Shiela will soon come this way. I stop part way through, and flush, then go down the stairs.

At the bottom of the stairs, is a sink. The base of the sink begins to leak from my flush, and spreads across the wooden floor to a thick rug. I run over and grab paper towels, soak up the wet rug area, then wipe it up back toward the sink. I recall the sink had been leaky for a while, so I am happy to have finally found the source of the leak - the toilet above. J-Rad is also happy we found the leak - I see him in the other room.

I wake up to find the same frequency noise emitting from the chime bar on my alarm clock!

I'm standing in a strange room, not really sure where, and realize I'm dreaming. I feel a bit mentally tired for some reason, so I decide to mostly just go with the flow of the dream rather than change it a lot. There is an army general looking guy in front of me, like the Russian guy from November Man. At least that's the role he's playing in my dream. Since I'm dreaming, I hit him across the face a few times to teach him not to be so evil. He just sits there and doesn't do anything, then gets up and motions for me to follow him. He walks over to a door, and opens it to a black void and steps through, disappearing out of the room.

I tell him to, "wait, I just need to find a fortune cookie" as I remember one of the Tasks. I reach into my right pocket expectantly, but its empty. I try my left pocket - empty. I reach into my back pockets, and they are empty too. I notice a shelf on the wall, full of bags of chips. "There's always fortune cookies stashed away on the back of shelves like this" I tell myself as I reach far back. I have to stand on my tip toes to reach back to the end, and I push all the chips over to the right as I feel around back there. Then I feel it - "A'ha!" I'm excited to see what it has to say. Before I open it, I wish that whatever wisdom I receive from this cookie, that it is beneficial for everyone and helps me as well in profound ways. I unwrap it, break it open, and scarf down half of it as I pull the tiny paper out. I notice that it tastes just like a regular fortune cookie.

I look at the fortune, and everything starts to get really blurry and the room starts to spin, everything starts fading as well. It seems like I'm about to wake up. I tell myself that, "I'm in control here, I can do what I want!" and remind myself that I'm dreaming, I have a dream body, and I'm standing in this dream room, about to read a fortune cookie. I'm holding the fortune upside down, so I rotate it right side up. As I do so, the lettering all changes to become very cryptic. I remember from looking at it upside down that it said something to the effect of, "It's godly to have no delusions, but look in your garden" I want to get a more accurate impression of the punctuation, spelling and so forth, but the more I look at the fortune, the more cryptic it becomes until it's just dots and commas, maybe a y and a j on there, but the message has completely changed. I look away and look back, but it is still losing clarity - mark by mark on the tiny paper.

I decide that I've milked that task for all I can so far, and remember the shoe task. I sit down at the table in the same room, and put a shoe on each foot. They just spontaneously appeared in front of me as I sat down, and my feet were just wearing socks, so it was really smooth. They even fit! Just regular running shoes. The room spins a little, and I'm now standing in a hallway, walking through a dorm building to my room. I really have to go to the bathroom, but I again remind myself that I'm dreaming, focus on my body, and my environment, and some sort of plan. That's it, a plan! What was I doing? I remember the shoes task again, but am not really sure I ever tied my shoes.

I walk into my room, the middle of which is a shower, surrounded by bunk beds. I don't see anyone else in the room. The lighting is rather dim, and I'm dressed like I'm about to take a shower (well, not dressed at all it turns out). The water turns on by itself, and the whole room seems to have become a shower. As the water pours down on me, I enjoy how warm and relaxing it feels. Now for the shoes. I normally wouldn't put shoes on in this situation, but I'm not satisfied with how it went earlier. Bending over, shoes again appear next to my feet. Some sort of running shoes again. I put them on, and tie a granny knot on each shoe - now soaked through and through from the shower.

Having to go pee really bad, I question just going in the dream, but don't want to wet myself IRL, so I hold it. Holy crap it burns I have to go so bad though. I remember drinking a 1/2 gallon of water just before bed, so it's probably an accurate signal.
I lose lucidity, and find myself on a boat, being excommunicated from my town, sent south along a river to Mexico or somewhere. Basically anywhere but where I was. It is a nice day, and I enjoy the sun as my room mates and I are floating down stream. I ask where they think we're going, and they don't know. Then my room mate RZ grabs onto a rope, and opens a sail, then jumps off our boat onto a raft. Pulling at the rope, he builds up some tension, then leaps off the raft and flies through the air, leaving us all behind to watch him fly away.

Then I wake up, having to pee, but not that bad.

Having snuck into a hostile military base, I hide in the men's restroom as some soldiers pass by. Grabbing a mob and bucket, I act like the janitor, and exit the room, walking casually toward the middle of the huge building I'm in. I am grabbed from behind by a soldier, but wrestle free from his grip and run. Tackled by two other soldiers, they bind my hands in thick metal bars, just about as thick as my wrist is.

Roaring defiantly, I summon super-human strength and rip free from the shackles. Some soldiers see this and shoot at me. Pulsing with strength, the bullets bounce off my chest as I walk toward them and throw them across the room. More to get them to stop shooting than to kill them, but it was a hard toss. With some brief freedom, I try to think of why I came in here in the first place. Nothing coming to mind, I walk out, and see all my friends just lounging around on top of and leaning against the high walls of this building. Just enjoying the sunny day, they wave at me as I look for a spot to sit as well.

One of them calls out to me from atop the wall, "Aren't you forgetting something inside there?" as he points back into the large structure.

I suppose he could be right, so I go back in. Now abandoned, I walk right up to the middle, and see a glowing red and orange hole in the floor. It looks like it goes all the way down to the magma. It sure is hot. More pieces of the floor fall into it as the hole expands with a terrible rumbling and shaking like a demonic earth quake. The building seems like it is beginning to collapse now. I run through falling debris to get outside just in time for most of the building inside the walls to cave into the fiery pit.

Erupting from this massive hole, already about 1 mile across, is Satan. None other than the devil himself. The ground buckles up forming a giant crater around him as he rises to spectacular heights in the sky. Like a giant mountain, his torso sits upon a swirling vortex of fiery magma, as wide as the hole. His body appears to be composed of the same, all encased in some thick black spiky armor. Thicker than I am tall, it covers his whole torso, most of his arms, and also forms a horned helmet with slits for eye holes. Inside of the helmet just glows the color of a hot fire.

I suppose I am the one tasked with defeating him. I still have the capability of increasing my strength, but looking up at him now, it looks like quite the challenge.

My thoughts are interrupted by Satan's attack. He swings a large spiked mass. A mixture of whatever his armor is and liquid magma, all connected to a large chain. The school bus sized spiked mass lands with a loud thump as I jump out of the way. Swinging it so fast, it takes all I've got just to get out of the way in time. He laughs and swings again. I have hardly enough time to regain my footing before I sprint and dive out of the way again. Small craters where he has struck make it harder to move around.

I don't have any weapons at all other than my fists. I look around for anything I can use, and there is nothing. The sky swirls with dark gray clouds above Satan's head. He opens his mouth to reveal yet more flames and molten metal as he stares at me. Letting out a ground trembling roar, he swings again.

Since it seems rather hopeless, I decide to at least have fun with the situation at hand. I jump onto his weapon just as he pulls it back. Hanging on tightly, I soar back up to his level, about 2 miles above the ground. Jumping off at just the right time, I plant my feet on his left shoulder and kick off with all my strength toward his face. Crossing just in front of his helmet, I poke him in the eye with my finger as I laugh a bit.

This seems to only further aggravate him as he clenches his jaw and growls at me.

Saved by the alarm clock!

Aboard a cruise ship with some friends, it starts to motor around in a large bay, doing a slow circle around it, gradually speeding up. It starts going faster and faster. Now on the second lap around the bay, it's going dangerously fast, and can't turn sharp enough to maintain the circular path. I hear the engines rev even higher as the ship scrapes on some rocks on the port side as we turn starboard to stay in the water, still circling clockwise.

Then, the captain takes us right off a 500 ft waterfall, and the entire massive cruise ship does a 360 degree spin mid-air before landing in the water below. Then a sharp right hand turn as it skirts along a narrow river just above another cliff. I turn to my friend and say, "We just did a 360 in a cruise ship!"
"So what..." he replies as he shrugs his shoulders unimpressed.

I hold onto the railings on the deck of the cruise liner, not sure if the captain will jump this cliff too. He gently floats us down the river and into the ocean from there. We cruise across a big body of water and get dropped off on land on the other side.

After spending some time amongst the thick green trees in some amazing warm weather, two friends and I decide it is time to go back. The two of them jump in and start swimming. I am a little hesitant because my new cell phone is in my pocket, but jump in anyway. It's water-resistant, so it might make it. We swim a ways out to a wooden raft anchored in the deep water. A small boat is parked right next to it as well. My friends climb aboard, and I begin to drive this boat. It is very small, just big enough to stand on, with a second story above where my friends hang on, legs dangling over the edge. It has a massive engine, and I take off with a spray of water behind us.

Driving wicked fast through the water, I give it full throttle as everything starts to blur. Our path home takes us from the ocean to a wide river. Still going super fast, everything is just streaks of blue and green along side of us. The river begins to narrow and turn a little in each direction. I have to really focus to stay in the water going this fast. The river narrows to not much wider than a two lane road, and the thought occurs to me that perhaps I should slow down. Instead, I increase my focus on driving, and manage to keep going super fast through this small river. Although it seems not to matter much because about half the time, we are in the air after hitting a small wave anyway. The back of the boat now has a giant propeller, like one of those swamp boats you might've seen, only about twice the size.

I sort of expect to start flying soon.

Aboard a large ship, watching as massive wooden platforms raise and lower just above and below the ocean's water level. People are on the platforms, having paid a fee to get up close and personal with some giant whales. With a 30 foot wide mouth full of sharp teeth, I am happy I am not in the water with those beasts.

All of the whales are ignoring the platforms, just bumping up against them as they swim around eating tiny whale food. The platforms are huge, so even though the people are knocked over, they don't fall into the water. The wooden platforms are being kept at just about knee deep in the water, rising only when hit by a passing whale. It is some sort of specialty cafe for people who want that sort of thing.

Then I see one of the whales bite into a platform, and pull it out from under one guy. A few pieces of debris remain floating, and the guy scrambles onto another platform. All at once, the whales have turned hostile and are trying to eat all the platforms. Another guy is standing on some small bit of board, and jumps with it onto a bigger board that is stuck to a whale's back and rides it like a massive whale powered surf board. I don't see anyone getting devoured, but it still seems dangerous.

Now aboard a helicopter sent to rescue the people in the water, we dip low enough so that the bottom of the helicopter is submerged. I am underneath the helicopter, together with about four women who have been recently rescued. All of us hold our breath as we go under. For some reason, the helicopter has to do this in order to rescue more people. It flies higher for a bit, just long enough for us all to catch our breath. Just when we start to dip toward the water again, one girl tries to radio the pilot to let everyone know it's really hard to hold our breath for so long. But before she can say much, we are underwater again. This time, there is a board right under us, and a big air bubble has briefly formed, giving us a small window to breathe again.

Flying out from the sea, we land back on shore in part of a large military building from where the helicopters originated. We clean ourselves up and prepare to go give an interview with reporters. Some workers are cleaning the rooms. One of the rooms is mine. I go in to clean up my mess, and see a few people already at it, so I leave the work to them. I help the pilots secure their helicopters using a small electro-magnetic tool that just has to be pressed lightly against many trigger points. My dad is one of the pilots, and I want to help him out. I hear it doing something mechanical, but don't really know what. Finished with that, I walk down to make an appearance with everyone, but am stopped by a reporter and her daughter. The reporter is talking in Spanish and tells me she specializes in stories like mine. I get her to speak in English, and she writes down her address for me to contact her. With, "Guten Morgen" I wave goodbye to her.