I can't seem to control anything

[sanctum]

I've managed to become very successful in getting into a lucid dream and staying completely lucid. My dreams are very vivid, stable, and lucid, too -- for example, last night I was in a dream of my room. All the details were correct, running my hands over the blanket felt perfectly real, and I could even notice how being in a dream changed the way I was thinking. All this is good and well, but it's no use when I can't seem to control anything. I can do little things, like levitate a piece of paper, but if I try to make a person appear -- nothing. I have a good imagination and can imagine a person in full detail sitting at the edge of my bed, but nothing happens. I turn away, close my eyes, picture it all...no one's there. I close my eyes and imagine my dream scene changing, or I open a door and see...still exactly what my house looks like, and nothing more. It's as if the vividness of my dream has convinced my brain that I'm perfectly awake, and therefore I shouldn't be able to change anything significant. I know it's mind over matter, but even believing something completely doesn't seem to change anything...what do I do?

[OctoberWind]

The first thing you need to remember is to not get frustrated no matter what happens. Of course, this is easier said than done. Congrats on getting lucid, btw. When you find yourself dreaming, close your eyes and take 5 deep breaths, on each inhale say "This is a dream" on the exhales say "I can do whatever I want" Also, if you want to convince your brain that this is truly a dream, do a quick reality check, my personal favorite is pinching my nose and trying to breath through it. Another thing you can try is, (absolutely make sure you are dreaming before you do this one) try doing something crazy, like jumping out a window. In addition to that, verbal commands work far better than mental ones. Start off small just closing your eyes and whispering to yourself what you want to happen. Then gradually work up the force until you are shouting it out with all your strength. The reason to start off small though, is that too much force can cause you to loose lucidity. Finally, if you want a person to appear, it's much easier to try to find a phone in your dream and call the person and invite them over, or walk past a corner and say "So-and-so will be on the other side of this turn" Hope this helped and good luck! Happy dreaming!

[rbear71]

you must become aware in your dream. You will never get control unless you wake without actually waking up. you are right on the edge of it and when you do become aware, ooohhhhh mannnn!!!!

[fOrceez]

Yeah, OwO has suggested something awesome, try verbal commands. Other than that, if you find you cannot control the dream directly, look around for nearby items such as a wand or anything that you can use similarly. This is a good way to avoid direct dream control, but if you want to gain direct dream control, you must try to let go of waking life's 'absolute rules' of physics. You could: 1) Visualize what would happen 2) Understand that this is a dream and you are the dreamer, thus you are absolute! 3) Use more detailed mechanics when trying your dream control ; e.g. when using telekinesis, feel the weight of the object and the push/pull of the air between yourself and the mass. There are two underlying key points about dream control; 1) Confidence 2) Expectation. Know that it will happen, don't doubt it.

[fullofbull58]

Confidence, determination, and focus together are key. I find that sometimes, when I do not feel in control of my waking life, that has a direct corrolation on lucid dream control.

[Mancon]

Confidence, determination, and focus together are key. I find that sometimes, when I do not feel in control of my waking life, that has a direct corrolation on lucid dream control. This. Just being confident and believing you can do it make all the different. Don't let a mental block slow you down. It's YOUR dream. You can do ANYTHING.

[Sageous]

Sanctum: Next time you're in this situation, just walk away. If the room won't change, then leave it. If you leave the room and the house is the same as your waking life house, then leave it as well. Keep doing this, with full expectation that you'll be in a new dream soon, and you'll very likely be in one. Oh, and just in case you're actually awake and only think you're dreaming, stay out of traffic! Also, you might hold off on the hard stuff, like conjuring dream characters for a little while...

[Dark_Merlin]

Sanctum: Next time you're in this situation, just walk away. If the room won't change, then leave it. If you leave the room and the house is the same as your waking life house, then leave it as well. Keep doing this, with full expectation that you'll be in a new dream soon, and you'll very likely be in one. Oh, and just in case you're actually awake and only think you're dreaming, stay out of traffic! Also, you might hold off on the hard stuff, like conjuring dream characters for a little while... I second what Sageous has said here. As hard as it can be sometimes to change your mind in the middle of a dream, sometimes just taking your mind away from that concentration and effort of trying to control the dream and then doing something else that feels more comfortable can really help you with your control. You'll be able to relax and demonstrate to yourself other things that come naturally to you in the dream Confidence, determination, and focus together are key. I find that sometimes, when I do not feel in control of my waking life, that has a direct corrolation on lucid dream control. And I also really like this! To me, my lucid count jumps when things in my life settle down and I feel calm and in control. My dreams become clear, stable and I have no trouble controlling dreams. If you remain confident and clear with what you want to achieve, you will reach your goals

[elucid]

There is another opinion as to what is the factor of control in dream. We are usually said it is mind over matter, but it could be different it could be that our dream world has a system and that we do not know our way around this system to get any desire we want. So it could be that those desires we usually get could be that the system makes it for us while we just want it, not necessarily that we are doing the controlling. So in this sense it is an illusion that we have control over the environment.

[Skydreamer707]

Reading this thread an idea just came to me. I have this EXACT same problem. Had it for 3 years. whenever my lucids are vivid i have zero control. why not state "if this was a dream, i could totally "phase through a wall" (insert impossible thing here) and then walk through a wall. Try pretending your in a game. Like if this was a dream i could "..." I dunno why this came to me, it doesnt even sound all that great. But i have a good feeling about it ^^ If you treat lucid dreaming like a game instead of reality it might trick your mind into treating it like a game. And to me, games are easily controlled. basically find an archtype for you that indicates control, ive tried everything from game controllers, to buttons, to a computer mouse. I think its all about mindset. Perhaps us thinking in the dream "this is so vivid, like real life/reality" is a bad mindset because we associate reality with zero control like fullofbull said. Well just my two cents, i never considered my mindset when dreaming. Kind of hit me off guard.