Sleep paralysis is no joke.

[lovesmusic2]

Had my first real experience with SP early this morning. I had tried it the other night and thought I did it (and maybe I did), but I only felt a little numb before whereas early this morning is a completely different story. This is the longest dream journal entry I have since I started it June 19. So last night I went to bed at about 11pm. Knowing that ever since I've been researching lucid dreaming and recording my dreams, I have been naturally waking up at around 5am. Wanting to practice sleep paralysis and WILD, I went to sleep as normal last night and set my alarm for 5am. Had a short dream and then heard my alarm go off. Per reading about WILD, I stayed up for 45 minutes. Got out of bed, drank some water, went to the bathroom, and sat on my computer reading more about how to relax and what to expect from sleep paralysis and WILD. So here starts my journal entry. ---- I put in some binaural beats (Lucid Dream Induction - "The I-Dreamer" - 90-Min Sleep Cycle (Isochronic Tones) - YouTube) to listen to and went to bed at 5:45am. I stretched my muscles one area at a time, starting with my feet. I was laying on my back with my arms up above my head and kept them there until I felt a strong urge to move them back. Then I stayed on my back until I felt the need to roll. I almost didn't, but remembered that it was okay because I needed to feel comfortable while performing WILD. So I rolled onto my right side. I kept repeating in my head that I will have a lucid dream. My body felt a little as if it was comfortably sinking into the bed. The next dream I had I saw a car driving. It stopped and out came a person. It took me a second to realize it was in the form of a video game character, but I did not recognize which one. Another one came out of the passenger side. They performed tasks as they would in the video game, so I saw different scenes very quickly, but the whole time I was thinking, "This is what I could do in a lucid dream." Why didn't I perform a reality check?! (had another dream that I wrote down, but not as important to type out) Was laying very still, recognizing that I was still listening to the audio recording I had put on before I went back to sleep at 5:45am. So after I had the previous dream, I started to feel numb while slowly somewhat waking up. Then all of the sudden I knew I was going into sleep paralysis. It slowly started as a small buzzing sound that became much stronger. It became this very loud buzzing sound and I had to remind myself the entire time to stay calm. It kept fading out, but then gradually got louder and stronger. Then all of the sudden (I think it was just) my upper body started shaking uncontrollably. My heart started racing as I heard words clear as day, "Can you really believe in me?" then I would shake violently again. That happened two more times after the first occurrence: hearing the buzzing, hearing the words, then shaking violently. I told myself to stay calm throughout the entire thing. I almost laughed because I wanted to tell the voice, "Yes I do believe in you." but when I was shaking it was as if I was shaking my head "no" and I was trying to shake it "yes". Also while telling myself to stay calm, I told myself that it was only a dream. I allowed the paralysis to take me over, telling the voice that I wanted to become lucid. I let it control of my body. My mouth was hung open the entire time as my whole upper body shook. I kept having to swallow, so I would do it quickly after each occurrence. I was hoping it wasn't going to disturb the process, but after the third round, I started to slowly wake up, but never once opening my eyes. I laid very still, hoping to become lucid right afterwards. I could feel my body again and my breathing becoming normal again. I continued to lay still in the position I woke up in (on my right side with my legs slightly bent and arms tucked in against my chest). I was still listening to the audio and then I heard more words. I became scared, thinking they were in my head again and my whole body started to tingle and my heart raced. But then I realized that it was just the words in the audio recording so I became calm again. The recording told me that it was just a dream, so even hearing that I became calm. I was practically begging my mind to put me in a dream state because I was on the edge of light sleep. I repeated over and over, "I will be lucid in my next dream and I will remember it." I tried to even imagine myself back in either one of my previous dreams. In my eyelids I could see lava lamp-like organic shapes and kept begging myself to put my in a dream state again, being very confident that I could lucid dream. The recording kept telling me to do reality checks, so I tried to imagine myself doing them. I even thought I heard myself talking, but having an echo just as they guy in the recording did. I could feel myself become excited since I had just experienced sleep paralysis that that would mean I would be able to have a lucid dream right afterwards. Maybe it killed the process of it. I did have little snippets of dream scenes, but I can't recall them at all. But after each one of them, I remember telling myself, "That was a dream. That was a dream." my confidence started to go down because I went back and forth from being awake, to very light sleep. I remember thinking, "I'm not going to be able to go back to sleep. I'm already awake." although I was still going back and forth. I had one more shorter dream and then I woke up at about 7:45am. ---- Everything happened within about 2 hours. That was an amazing experience, although VERY scary. I've read up on some posts where people have seen demons and other things crawling in their room during SP. After my experience, I can't even imagine seeing that. Now I'm almost scared to sleep tonight, but also can't wait to welcome it. Bless you if you read all of that, but I felt a need to share it with someone. Wow. Now thinking back on the SP, I sit here wondering if it really happened although I know it did. It just feels like another dream now. But during the process, it was definitely real. Wow. Edit: I made another post about it, but I have a love for dragons. It was right after I read the book "Song in the Silence" by Elizabeth Kerner that I felt a strong longing for a dragon companion. It was a couple days after that I heard of LD and instantly knew I wanted to see and/or befriend a dragon. I have fallen in love with the name Kord and have even tried including it in my mantra, "I will lucid dream and I will see Kord." Maybe it was him? As crazy as it sounds. But then again, I guess we all sound a bit crazy in this neck of the woods.