I know it's been a while since I posted...not for lack of thinking about LDing. I bought Galantamine and took 8 mg this morning and then promptly puked my guts out...but then after 2 1/2 hours I went back to sleep - i thought I'm certainly not going to waste this crappy experience and NOT try to have a lucid dream if at all possible! LOL. And I did have an LD...my goal for the last several months in which I haven't had an LD was to see my deceased parents. My current goal with the Galantamine was to feel how it felt, look at my hands and dream body and try to remember and notice the dreaming state so I could have an LD more easily and hopefully more frequently in the future. Well, that was my thought anyway.

So, I go back to bed and I see HI, a white blank then it would transform into a family room, similar to my own, then back to white and back and forth quite a few times. Then I couldn't feel my WL body but I knew it was there, it's hard to explain, then I was in a family room and I heard my mother. I'm not sure what went on between the HI and being in a family room with my family. When I heard my mother's voice and turned to her, I got all choked up b/c I knew I was dreaming but happy to see her. I hugged her and told her I love her and miss her and she was sweet but not 100% looking like my mother - in NL dreams, she's always looked like her healthier self (before she passed away from cancer) but in this LD she was bloated, strange but my father was there (who has also passed away) and looked normal and I didn't skip a beat. I acted like he was still living just like my sisters who were in the dream also. Then Mom faded or disappeared and I was looking out a sliding glass door and knowing I was dreaming I tried to kick it in (why I have no idea) and it took me a couple of tries and it just sort of bowed out. I laughed and moved on. Can't remember much else.

Then, I could hear my husband in WL and still couldn't really feel my body and could see some HI shapes. I tried to go back into the dream to no avail.

Now, I feel like I cheated and can't count this as an LD. And it was pretty horrible getting so sick. I won't be doing that again but I WILL get back to self awareness and be committed to meditating more frequently. My husband thinks I'm insane to have tried "drugs" but I truly felt that desperate. Now, I'll try the old fashioned way, back to MILDs and awareness. Thanks for listening. And if anyone ever gets together in the US, I want in!! Still grateful for DV.