Aye mate, that's what I'm on about. If you're having a dream where you are doing something which requires dream control - say flying for instance, and you feel that you know it is a dream you are having... But you just carry on doing what you were doing, or you end up embroiled in a task you had (and have) no intention of doing; with no concern for your waking intentions... I'm not sure I'm actually lucid.
It's just that being lucid is part of the non-lucid plot I'm now a part of, largely because this subject takes up so much of my conscious thought lately that it's creeping into my unconscious.

But the only reason I've been pondering this is the large difference in how real those two moments of clear lucidity I had were (even though I lost both immediately). I don't expect you to have an answer, I suppose it's a subjective reality and so "is what it is" because we make it so - knowingly or not.

And thanks for the answer on the whole "fade into white" thing too. Having only had it the once, I did wonder if I'd just missed out on an opportunity of some kind.