Unfortunately, many people see no deeper into existence than the superficial concept of 'status.' To many, status is everything. It is their badge of merit, to say "look at me, your [life/yard/wardrobe/job/etc] does not make you better than me, because I have [money/cars/clothes/big home/specific job/etc], too!" It is the common human sentiment that the fashion and automobile industries (to name only two) feed off of. Some people are just so out of touch with anything that can't be 'accepted by their peers' - or doesn't show immediate worth to people other than themselves - that they begin to ridicule and look down upon those who don't fit their world view, or have that same level of 'status', that they do. In part, it helps them feel good about themselves, and reinforce their decisions to settle for such superficial, 'keeping up with the Jones'" lifestyles. In essence, they become that force which had previously forced them into living that type of shallow life.
I think there is a lot of truth in what Darkmatters is saying. Your mother may very well be trying to balance you out, however if that is her intention, she has a responsibility to be careful about the way she comes about it. For her to be trying to truly balance you, she has to - herself - acknowledge the good and bad in both ideologies. Judging from the OP, it doesn't seem like she's put much (any) effort into that. To not do so, and to simply demonize your musings and motivations, is not to profess balance. Of course, if one's mind is strong enough, they can learn to take the good out of what people - who tenaciously argue the value of their lifestyle choices over that of others - are trying to say. That's a quality that you have to have in yourself. However, I don't think it lets the 'teacher' off the hook for displaying a pretty shallow, closed-minded and arguably insecure mind set.
As Zhalyin said, though, it's unfortunately one of those things that aren't easy to change with some people, and we sometimes just have to let it go.
|
|
Bookmarks