ZAD
Randolph Carter

Trying to get back in the game again.

20210521
* Multiple dreams likely influenced by watching a few episodes of Love, Death, and Robots on Netflix yesterday.
* Fragment: walking through a dark city.
* Extended fragment group: in a pop-up community nested inside of a combination warehouse/train station. I was younger? Started out sitting on the floor, feelings of rejection. Our community is being sabotaged by the unseemly inspector/pest-control man. Alternating dark brown and light white/blue environments. Sitting on a long central bench with previously tentative characters after bonding - themes of friendship, community. Wholesome.
* Sleep notes: asleep around 11-12, woke at 5:10 and was very uncomfortable until 7:20 when I forced myself up.

* EDIT: forgot to add that after sleeping primarily on my back for the last few months, I made an effort to sleep on my side the last two nights, which may have helped with the more vivid dreams. I had pretty long and detailed dreams last night as well.

20210520
* A lot of dream fragments featuring my wife in different forms.
* Fragment: themes of age and youth. My wife and I are in the second story of a stone castle-like apartment with all of the lights turned off inside, looking out and down on the yard/driveway and downtown street. It's dark, illuminated only by streetlights. Late night or early morning. We watch the young-adult-aged daughter of the house owner approach the oddly positioned staircase with her small dog. We don't want to be caught watching her approach -- we may have been hiding out in the house? The dog sees us and enters our room playfully.

Will be trying to update here more frequently. I've really been neglecting the opportunity that COVID has given me to up my dream game and be more diligent with journaling. So let's change that!

20200801 (3nl)

1. swamp monster hunters consulting gypsies and bringing along journalist woman (she smelled?); in the woods skinny tweaker methheads interacting with big gnarled ginger root woody monsters, white van parked with headlights; in the stream, small monster with big nose - gypsies confirmed it's the worst one
This was a pretty memorable dream as far as the visuals and emotions. It was actually narrated, and sort of felt like an episode of True Detective (S1) with the lighting and "cinematography" if I can put it that way.

2. before this, downton abbey style old house family drama

3. shopping mall or false memory?

WBTB 1.

(Dream) 2 liter capless, fried egg stairs, (knife), F, alt apartment, night, cars

(WILD) In 8 nighttime, phase out of sliding glass door, accidentally phase through ground too, end up in Medieval chambers, long tables and a closet full of loose weapons (some really unique - twisted wood with two razor sharp small blades, lots of interesting maces, no swords; see guy, attack his head but he's resilient, turns out there's beasts we need to fight, pick up a bow and some rubber tipped arrows, keep asking him for a sword, eventually wake. Was a long (5ish minute) dream!

WBTB 2.

(WILD) In dark room, burnt man interviewing someone (nasty) but as he asks questions he's sketching in some lewd, nude, and (a bit) rude drawings, he goes on to some featuring Mewtwo and I make fun of him, see I on way out, then become lucid and leave the room, transform self in mirror but mirror is inconsistent - not keeping up with my movements or angles or anything. So I take the mirror outside and fly, it reflects the stars and moon well but my face is strangely small in the middle and sort of holographic. Could feel my waking body

(WILD) Not sure beginning of dream but daytime 9 and I walk out of garage and fly towards P's house, I fly fast and high at first, then swoop down load and slow down, and start trying to "summon" an ocean because of comments I told to F last night. Beneath me there starts flowing a pretty big ocean surge, but I try to imagine the ocean in front of me now, and it doesn't, just more and more rows of houses. Slowly the houses start to thin out and I get some wilderness location, and see an interesting cave I want to explore, so I stop (which is a bit hard with my momentum going) and hover down into the mouth of the cave, but it's a lot smaller than it looked from the sky and I just fit my feet and waist in and start looking around when I wake up. Could feel my waking body



Notes: Trying two new mantras together with each other. The first is "My dream is me", reminding myself to meditate on the fact that I can take full control of the dream and not pay any mind to inhibitory thoughts or feelings that may cause me to go nonlucid or break out of a dream too soon. The second is "I wake as I wake", reminding me to lie still and do a state test each time I wake to catch DEILDs and/or do more WILDs.

WBTB when F left for work. As I got back in bed I thought briefly about LDing but didn't MILD or anything. I relaxed and drifted, but right before I slipped out of consciousness I snapped back into awareness and began to feel the waves of vibrations. I was having the transparent eyelids effect and could see I was in a replica of my room. I had some expectation of SP/RA since I've had a few pretty spooky instances of that lately when I've MILDed (or sometimes when awaking from a DILD). However none came, and I started drifting up and to the right. I relaxed and let myself go.

Slowly I floated over to one of the walls and when I felt my dream body was free, I pushed off the wall onto the floor and walked down the hallway. I said "lights" and hoped that would work but it rarely does and didn't. I decided to do the thing that almost always fucks up my WILDs and phase through my window, hoping that that would be more successful than walking through my almost pitch-black apartment. This time instead of trying to phase through the curtains (which I always do for some reason), I pulled back the curtains and phased through the glass. It was double-paned with about six inches of separation between the two, so I thought I may have trouble getting through, but I decided to expect it to work, and it did.

Outside seemed like my apartment grounds at first, but it became clear that I was in the quad of my old college campus. I floated down (my whole body was engaged, it was a nice and quite physical dream, with some light gravity). I aimed my fall and landed on a nice bush, grabbing it with my hands and balancing myself on it with my feet, before I dropped to the ground. It was still night, and everything was lit by tall streetlamps along the path. One of them had its box cracked open, with the plastic exposing lots of thin red and blue wires. I walked along for a bit and then woke up.

Dreams
A1: Neighborhood - lost some details on this one
2: Hotel - night - cost $850, feels like a lodge, mattress and sheets are broken into three parts, very comfortable, owner of hotel walks in when I'm in a strange position, she says she didn't want us to be stuck in there and hands us a key
#125: Childhood home - night - start in kitchen, look out sliding door and see shadow running across backyard, walk down hallway to parent's bedroom, feel strong intuition and instantly become lucid!
3: FA - night - writing down these dreams in bed
B4: Classroom area - day - classmates (hs, college, various other) are constantly asking me to help/remind them of something, after a while I get mad and say "do it yourself!", suddenly they all turn on me and the class is assigned some really complicated work with no explanation; transition to mall area - walk past a "kpop store" with nicely dressed korean girls in long coats, walk around near a couple of old asian ladies who are weaving/decorating huge rugs with gold leaf and nice thread, I try to step around them but accidentally step on one and the old lady against the wall gets angry, I go talk to her and after I somehow explain myself, she says her name is "Garou Jin" and that she will pardon me for it, and I can take a letter to my teacher, however each time I try to repeat her name to her she corrects me. [Interesting setting]
5: Inside apartment - morning - waiting for F to go to work, mix myself a drink (it looks odd, much like the one I made yesterday), watching TV and listening to headphones; in this version of our apartment, it was as if light was flowing through from the gap where our stairs are, and it created a very pleasing effect. The rest of the room was painted in soft blue-green pastels; a comfortable dream environment.
6: Deja vu location - day - McDonald's location from a past dream when I was first starting a new job over a year ago; it's always cool to visit a generated dream location (not from real life) twice.
C7: Campus sidewalk - day - walking with two girls (I'm part of campus security?), suddenly transition to outside my apartment by the office - there's an older woman with a very young owl sitting on an ice chest. There is also a large convoluted chicken head and it opens its mouth wide as if it's going to feed the small owl. The owl sticks its head in but the chicken head quickly swallows it whole. The two girls are distraught and the tries and fails to pull the owl out, so instead she sets up a small grill with shish kebab. She eventually convinces me that since we can't save the owl, all we can do is kill it quickly and enjoy the food.
8: Inside apartment - I've taken apart my dog's leash and am trying to put it back together, but suddenly it's transformed into a vacuum cleaner and my dog falls backwards into the tank of the vacuum.
9: Childhood home - laundry room with dad, talking about where detergents(?) are located in various cabinets, suddenly his face has a pixelated mask on the front surface of it, some kind of luchadore. In the other room there is a movie on with Tom Cruise and some woman, they're dancing (it's a drama).

Sleep Pattern
A: 10:00pm to 2:50am
B: 3:30am to 5:30am
C: 5:40am to 8:05am

Time Notes
Last food: 8pm
Alcohol: 5pm