Thread: Nightmare effecting my sleep an making me depressed

Hi everyone,
I'm posting on here as a matter of desperation, as my family think the stress is getting to me an I shouldn't worry about it. Lately (last few months) I have had very disturbed sleep an quiet often have terrible dreams of my fiancé leaving me an me begging for him back. I trust him with everything, an when awake have no fear of him leaving but the dreams feel so real. I often wake up sad but after cuddles I feel better. We have been together 2 years an are getting married in nov. he honestly is the best thing an I cannot fault him. He treats me like a queen, an I know I am so lucky to have him!! The reason for my post is the dream I had last night, which has resulted in me being in tears almost all day!!
I was with another man (he looked like an actor from smokey an the bandit) with the mostache, who I have NO. Physical attraction to what so ever. Thro the dream I felt like I didn't want to be with him an wanted to be with Nathan ( my fiancé) but it wasn't as if I was being forced to be there. We were on a construction site together ( my fiancé is a carpenter) an I was watching Nathan work whilst this guy was talking to me an I wasn't really paying attention to him. Then Nathan cut his finger an it was bleeding severely an he refused for anyone else to look at it. He then came down these stairs towards me an I was the only one he would let look after him. Whilst dressing his finger I kissed him on the forehead an told him I loved him, which he said I love u to. I then told him I wanted to be with him, an he said that ship has sailed. An I held his head against my chest an we both cried. Which is when I woke up. I couldn't have any cuddles or talk to Nathan abOut it cos he had already left for work. I have sobbed I controllably multiple times today an feel so guilty an depressed, even tho I know in my reasonable mind that I love him more than anything, an he loves me to, but I don't know why I keep having these horrible dreams an how I can get them to stop.

Any opinions will be appreciated. It should be noted that I have never been unfaithful, an have never considered it and will never consider it.

While dreams sometimes depict deep feelings or desires that might be silenced while awake (which is what you're worried about: that these dreams are an insight to some small belief he might leave you), but often dreams are simply visualisations of your imagination. In other words, if you can think it, it can come up in a dream.

What I think is happening is that each time you have a dream like this one, in which you and your fiance aren't together anymore, it forces you to think about it for a good portion of the following day. The more you think about it during the day, the more likely you are to have a dream about it again. I'll often have dreams about things I've thought about during the preceding day, regardless of whether they mean anything.

Hopefully this information will help, as once you rationalise and realise your dreams are just that and nothing more, you won't think about it nearly as much during the day and have far fewer of the same dream in the future.

Thanks mosh

Happy to help, if this doesn't end up helping, or if you think I've missed/overlooked something - let me know and I'll give it another crack. Feel free to PM me as well if you want.

no need to feel guilty about whatever you dream about. looks like your dreams are results of fears. focus on what you want to dream about before you go to sleep, and whenever you think of your nightmares. make the visualizations detailed

It sounds like a stress dream to me. Are you stressed out about the wedding being so soon? Weddings are a very stressful time, especially for the bride. That could have something to do with it, just your stress popping up in your dreams, making your worries and anxieties come to life at night. I'm sure as soon as you have less to worry about, things will start to even out again.

Try not to worry too much, it does sound like you're really stressed and its taking its toll on your sleep. Have you talked to your other half about the dreams? If you can talk to him and try to laugh about parts of them together they might not seem so bad in your mind, and you'll feel less guilty, i sometimes have dreams about other blokes, birds, exes and always feel bad when i wake up next to my husband but we talk about it and laugh about how daft my brain is! Makes it seem less weird lol xx