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    CanisLucidus

    Generosity and Giants

    by , 01-27-2013 at 05:03 PM (862 Views)
    This lucid was fueled by pure desperation. I've never fought this hard to save an LD that was going bad, but it paid off. I'm getting a lot of mileage out of this gladius thing.

    Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

    Lucid #58: Generosity and Giants

    A young woman named "Crystal Fleming" is collecting money for a charity, and I've pledged $33.13. I'm proud of my "generosity" and totally thrilled that I've found exact change down to the penny. But now I can't find Crystal. It's night, and I trudge across a snowy field to a picnic table where I think she might be waiting. But rather than Crystal, seated at the table is my friend W.

    This is unexpected, and as soon as I question whether I'm dreaming,
    I know that I am. I tell W, "Gotta go, this is a lucid dream." His face is harshly lit, stony, and expressionless. I realize we're in a small, dark room now, getting darker by the moment. I head for the exit, but the scene fades...

    Now I'm in the dark. I'm desperate for a lucid dream, though, so there's no way I'm letting this one go. I start swinging a gladius (ancient Roman sword) and willing myself to be in the Colosseum for Task of the Year. On top of this I shout, "This is still a lucid dream!"

    I hear Wife muttering and rolling over nearby, and now I'm scared that I'm really yelling and waving my arms around in the bedroom. I want a lucid too badly to stop trying, though, so I jam the index and middle finger of my left hand into my mouth and start chewing on them. This all feels totally real, but I decide to ride it out to the end. If I look like a psycho, I look like a psycho. I'm not dropping this LD.

    Suddenly, a sharp new dream scene forms: I'm standing on our bed, fingers in my mouth, swordless right hand swinging madly. The scene's extremely vivid, but there's a slight motion to everything that I see, like I'm slightly drunk. I hop down from the bed and run out into the hall.

    The hallway outside of our bedroom is totally transformed. The carpeting is bright pink and the room is decorated floor to ceiling with stuffed animals. There's an exit to the right that doesn't exist IWL, so I explore it, curious where it leads. I find myself in a new hallway with a tall picture window overlooking an early morning street scene.

    I phase through the glass out onto the street. The street is wet as if it rained overnight. A few cars pass by, headlights on. It looks like a work day that's just beginning. I fly up into the air, but my confidence isn't what it should be. My altitude is low and my speed's really pitiful. There's an entrance to a mall food court nearby, and the dream seems to be ushering me toward it. I don't resist.

    In spite of the early hours, this food court is packed. It's a two story mall, so I try flying again, getting about 6 feet off of the ground and doing that slow drift again. I spot my reflection in the exit door on the opposite side of the food court. Except the reflection isn't me flying -- it's my 6'8" Uncle J walking toward the door with me flying over his shoulder. He looks solid, substantial, and real, while I look like some kind of phantasm. I look down, and he's not there. But in the glass's reflection, he's solid-looking and completely realistic.

    Now I can't decide whether I'm me flying toward the door or if I'm my gigantic uncle, lumbering toward the exit on foot. I switch between feeling like I'm the one flying... then the one on foot... then both...

    I raise my hand to phase through the door. Uncle J's reflection does the same. The phase fails. From below, an attractive DC calls to me, saying, "Hi! Come down here." The LD's starting to feel thin and I float down. The DC is about 30 with long, dark hair, and attractive almost to the point of absurdity. I remember reading Waggoner during my WBTB and want to ask her what she represents. I feel weak and insubstantial, though, and my voice is just a hoarse whisper. She looks at me, arms crossed, a wry smile on her face and the scene fades to black.

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    Comments

    1. Xanous's Avatar
      Awesome, dude! I love your tenacity. chewing on your fingers... I guess whatever works however crazy it sounds. I might keep that particular idea in mind.

      I'm the one flying... then the one on foot... then both...
      That's got to be one of those things you just can't wrap your head around until you experience it a dream. Crazy stuff. I love it!

      Is he really 6'8" !?!
      CanisLucidus likes this.
    2. CanisLucidus's Avatar
      Thanks, man! The finger chewing was sort of instinctual because I was trying to shout but not quite as loud. So I wound up stuffing my fingers in my mouth and then gnawing on them. Weird, I know.

      And it's true, he really is 6'8"! He is just an enormous guy. This is the first time that I can remember him showing up in any of my dreams, lucid or non-lucid, so it was interesting to have him pop up so dramatically here.

      Thanks for all the encouragement while I was in the dry spell, man! I was starting to feel a bit pitiful.
      Xanous likes this.
    3. LiamDreamer's Avatar
      Wow - that's really great control. I've flown in lucid dreams I've had and sometimes it's difficult to get height - I wonder is it your mind telling you're holding yourself back in life at the time?
      CanisLucidus likes this.
    4. CanisLucidus's Avatar
      Thanks, LiamDreamer! I know what you mean on the flight issue... sometimes flight comes so naturally, and other times I get really poor acceleration or (even weirder) counter-winds that try to blow me in a different direction. Just one of those beliefs I'll have to keep breaking down. Dream control, in my experience, has always been about confidence, detail, and not getting into fights with my own subconscious. I imagine there's just no substitute for practice.

      Interesting idea on what it all means. Because, as you said, any failure to fly in a lucid is by definition me holding myself back. Nothing like lucid dreaming practice to help break those barriers down, IMO.
    5. The Sandman's Avatar
      I respect your determination. Could you explain the "Gladius thing" you are getting a lot of mileage out of? I read another dream where you mentioned it and I saw the sword pic. What's up? Is it a technique, or just the ToTM/Y?

      Per Xanous: I'm the one flying... then the one on foot... then both...
      That's got to be one of those things you just can't wrap your head around until you experience it a dream.
      I've been there. It's rather confusing because it doesn't make sense, so even though it makes some sense with dream logic, you can't really use that logic to progress in your dream. I mean, as whom do you proceed?...and the questions just keep coming.

      Congrats on the lucid.
      CanisLucidus likes this.
    6. CanisLucidus's Avatar
      I respect your determination. Could you explain the "Gladius thing" you are getting a lot of mileage out of? I read another dream where you mentioned it and I saw the sword pic. What's up? Is it a technique, or just the ToTM/Y?
      Thanks, Sandman! You've got it right -- this is from a Task of the Year item. The "Europe" task for this year is to go to the Colosseum and have a fight to the death with a DC.

      In some recent dream, Xanous had described a technique where he would DEILD or escape dark scenes by imagining himself doing something very specific and physical, such as riding a bike. That's great for him because it's very familiar. We got to talking about that, and I wondered if I could use something more specific, like crazily waving a sword around. We've both tried it since (I've tried it three times now, with at least some success, including an unpublished lucid fragment.) It's worked quite well at plopping us back into some scene. Xanous manages to end up in the Colosseum a lot from this, while I ended up all sorts of various places.

      Anyway, it's been a very useful approach for doing DEILDs and dark scenes. You can turn those seconds-long lucid fragments into full-on LDs this way sometimes, which is huge. DEILD didn't come easy for me, so I appreciate the power of helpers like this.

      I've been there. It's rather confusing because it doesn't make sense, so even though it makes some sense with dream logic, you can't really use that logic to progress in your dream. I mean, as whom do you proceed?...and the questions just keep coming.
      Exactly. I've had a few moments of identity crisis like this, and man are they trippy. The weirdest yet was probably one where I was following my doppelganger and hearing his thoughts, while I was a disembodied observer. This was the one: Technicolor Thomas Jefferson - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views

      Congrats on the lucid.
      Thanks, it's much appreciated! I really felt like I needed this one, so it was great to have it come along.
      The Sandman likes this.
    7. The Sandman's Avatar
      I don't really get DEILD. I always DILD, and on rare occasion I have done a WBTB. I just don't see how you DEILD. I've looked into it, but I don't really get it.

      The weirdest yet was probably one where I was following my doppelganger and hearing his thoughts, while I was a disembodied observer.
      This sounds like the ultimate in being and not being a DC. Kind of recursive. That would just be annoying...to me...

      OK, just read the dream. It was awesome. I commented over there.
      CanisLucidus likes this.
    8. Iokheira's Avatar
      Congrats on the dry-spell breaker! You have very interesting ways to try to maintain lucidity xD Your uncle must be insane! My brother-in-law is 6' something and he is huge, so I can't even imagine how big your uncle is.
      CanisLucidus likes this.
    9. Taffy's Avatar
      Wooooah good job not letting that LD go!
      CanisLucidus likes this.
    10. CanisLucidus's Avatar
      I don't really get DEILD. I always DILD, and on rare occasion I have done a WBTB. I just don't see how you DEILD. I've looked into it, but I don't really get it.
      @Sandman - I think of DEILD as basically a WILD on easy mode. Once you learn to catch yourself half-dreaming or not quite awake, a good DEILD lets you grab hold of your awareness, hang on, and plunge back under straight into a dream. Hitting the perfect mix of awareness and total relaxation is the trick, and it was a struggle for me. It really is just doing a WILD in the most optimal possible circumstances. And lately I've come to believe that "dark scenes" in lucid dreams are a form of even higher percentage DEILD.

      This dream from Xanous is my go-to example of first-class DEILD work. He bails himself out literally half a dozen times. Really amazing way to keep playing when the dream tries to shake you off: *LUCID* The Deep Blue Sea TOTM - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views

      And WBTB, as much of a pain as it is, finally won my heart. I resisted it for a long, long time, but in the end it just delivered the goods so well that I surrendered. (The ones that go for about 30 minutes seem especially effective.) My body wakes naturally at the right time these days if I'm not too exhausted. (~90% of my lucids come after a WBTB.)

      This sounds like the ultimate in being and not being a DC. Kind of recursive. That would just be annoying...to me...

      OK, just read the dream. It was awesome. I commented over there.
      Thanks. It was pretty amazing. I felt like I had taken some sort of bizarre drug, but all I'd done was go a little crazy eating peanut butter. Never have been able to replicate anything this weird with PB since.
      Xanous and The Sandman like this.
      Updated 01-28-2013 at 04:12 AM by CanisLucidus
    11. CanisLucidus's Avatar
      @NewArtemis - Thanks! And I know... where do I come up with these weird stabilizing ideas? I'm always slapping myself in the face, licking my arm, sticking my fingers in my mouth, flicking my teeth, etc. Apparently rubbing my hands together like every other normal person just doesn't cut it.

      And yes, a 6'8" man at full stretch really is a sight to behold. You know what's nuts? Hit ex-wife was between 6'3" and 6'4". Man, seeing the two of them together was just mind-blowing, particularly when I was young and not yet at my full adult height!

      @Taffy - Thanks, I appreciate it! I was so desperate for a lucid that I held onto this one by my bloody fingernails.
      NewArtemis likes this.
    12. The Sandman's Avatar
      Canis,

      I guess I have DEILD'd before. I just forget that you are taking advantage of the brief moment you are awake after coming out of a dream. One of my last few dreams was a DEILD. I had SP, thought about something, and was immediately dreaming, felt SP again, thought some more, and was LDing again.

      Glad I talked to you about it. It forced me to look it up and read about it again.

      As a side note, It seems you have some good DV friends.
      CanisLucidus likes this.
      Updated 01-28-2013 at 04:19 PM by The Sandman
    13. The Sandman's Avatar
      Just read the Deep Blue Sea dream. It was an excellent piece of work!
      CanisLucidus and Xanous like this.
    14. CanisLucidus's Avatar
      I guess I have DEILD'd before. I just forget that you are taking advantage of the brief moment you are awake after coming out of a dream. One of my last few dreams was a DEILD. I had SP, thought about something, and was immediately dreaming, felt SP again, thought some more, and was LDing again.

      Glad I talked to you about it. It forced me to look it up and read about it again.
      It really is an amazing tech simply because it rolls in so well as an auxiliary to WILD or one of the DILD-based techniques. If you experience sleep paralysis, you may be quite a natural for it. I still miss many of my attempts, but so long as I keep rolling the dice, eventually it's got to hit for me.

      As a side note, It seems you have some good DV friends.
      Oh man, I owe my friends here on DV so much. Being able to share ideas and experiences with all-around cool people (yourself included!) has been such a huge help for my practice. I found that I could only take things so far on my own. (Not very!) I never expected to become as close friends as I have with some of the folks here.

      Just read the Deep Blue Sea dream. It was an excellent piece of work!
      I agree! Glad that you enjoyed reading it. If I were Xanous, I'd probably read it every day and then flex in the bathroom mirror so that I started the day feeling like a friggin machine.
      The Sandman likes this.
    15. Xanous's Avatar
      If I were Xanous, I'd probably read it every day and then flex in the bathroom mirror so that I started the day feeling like a friggin machine.
      Oh quit it. Lol. It was just one of those higher level lucids that comes along every so often. I wish I could have them more often.
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