Xanous' Dream Journal

#454 - DILD - 4:03AM

I am out of town with my brother hanging out in a mechanic’s shop. We are good friend's with the owner and I see some one has an open beer sitting out. The own comes into the room and seems very drunk so we all start drinking. Some kid's join in but they take it way too far. A teenage girl and boy take turn shot-gunning can's of beer and one spills a lot. The boy takes a swim in the puddle of beer.

Our wife's stop in and want us all to go out. I tell them we already went bowling, but I'd be willing to go out again. I am surprised that no one seems to care about the teenagers staggering around drunk. I lay at them because they only drank three beers and they are totally wasted.

I leave to meet everyone wherever we are going and stop at a fast food restaurant. My old friend Carrie is working there and she seems a little annoyed to see me. I feel awkward and dismiss myself to the restroom. I notice the restroom is very small and only has space for one urinal. I pee then take a look in the mirror. I am shocked that my hair is completely shave off. I look really good bald, but miss my hair. I wonder if someone shaved my hair when I was drunk, but I don't see how I wouldn't know. Suddenly, it dawns on me and I say to my mirror DC, "I am dreaming!" I watch my reflection spin around as my hair now looks longer in places and with bald patches. I stare amused at this until I wake up.

#453 - DILD - 5:16AM

Last night, for whatever reason, I found it comforting to wear my sleep mask that I mainly use to block the early sun light on days I get to sleep in. Someone on place gave me the idea to use the sleep mask as a reality check. If I can see, I must be dreaming.

I am in some version of my grandparent's old house. There is some conversation with Nanny that I don't recall. I walk into a room and realize that I can see and decide that I must be dreaming. Excited, I look around the room to see what I can find. I spot and orange tabby cat. It notices me, and scurries away.

I become deeply introspective for awhile and lose my lucidity. I don't recall much of this, but my thoughts come back around to being at my grandparent's house. The last time I was here was right after they... OH! I remember that I have no surviving grandparents and being here brings me back to full lucidity. I think about searching them out, but really don't want to revisit the emotions, so I abandon the idea. I see the cat again, but like last time, it's runs off. I think to chase it, but remember I had a goal in mind. I want to get an inanimate object to talk to me. I happen to have an empty drinking glass in my right hand so I decide to talk to that, "Hello. How are you?" To my surprise, someone has drawn a face on the glass with a permanent marker. Ha! This is great!
I listen, but can only hear a faint, "Hello."
I talk to the glass again, but this time put it to my ear. There is no sound. I try a third time, but can't get anything else out of the glass. I become overly frustrated and and shout, "Talk to me you SOB!" I then squeeze the glass with both hands until it pops and shatters. Oops. I let it fall to the floor and search for something else, but I quickly wake up.

#451 - DILD - 7:15AM

Some goons are chasing because I have an item that is valuable to them. Two come at me and to shoot them both with pistol. I feel like this is a video game and I become lucid. I run through many doors and various rooms for quite a long time. I eventually come to a larger room and meet one of the bad guys head on. Knowing this is a dream an nothing can hurt me, I bum rush the man and put my gun to his temple. I am disappointed by the lack of sound and only see sparks spurting out the other side. Perhaps they are robots? I let this thought go as collect my thoughts as I dismiss whatever story line I was involved in. I realize that I had some goals in mind, but I can't seem to recall them. The effort of thinking on this causes the dream to collapse. I rub my hands to stabilize, but it is of no use.


7:25

I lay awake for a while and think of some cool lucid dream goals. Staring at a ceiling fan and trying to walk up a rainbow. Perhaps one night I'll give it a go.

#452 - DEILD - 7:46AM

I fall into a non lucid dream of being a rapper on stage. I spout some freestyle nonsense and end up sounding a lot like Emenim. I wake up slightly and start to rub my hands with my dream body. I am surprised how vivid it feels so I get up out of bed. I am blind, but I remember that I put on my sleep mask to block out the day light. I try looking through the mask and find that I can partially see the room. This only works for awhile as I make my way outside. I very much feel the mask on my face, but never think to take it off in the dream. I am blind outside and the dream quickly collapses and I wake up.
Or so I thought. It turns out to be a false awakening and I spend a lot of time trying to record my dream in my DJ without much success. I eventually wake up.

#450 - DEILD - 5:21AM

Summary:

I OBE to my sister-in-law's. Practice eye movements and slip out a window. It's cold and rainy. Some white flower petals are mixed with the rain. I interrupt a lesbian couple kissing, ask where the aliens are, and one starts morphing into a grey alien. A noise wakes me up prematurely.

I am half wake and aware that I can hardly move. My body feels extra heavy. My right hand is slightly tingly and I am in an uncomfortable position altogether, but instead of trying to move, I just relax as much as possible. I notice my foot slides off the bed some, but I just ignore it the best I can. After a few seconds, I decide to just try moving my dream body and my awareness slips from the physical to the non-physical. I notice I have no vibrations this time and as I tumble to the floor I all my discomfort has vanishes. It feels awesome to have such a vivid OBE again.

I stand up and look around. The environment is dark and I am in the living room of a house similar to my sister-in-law's. I walk around a bit and practice slow and deliberate left-right eye movements. It's better this time and I move on. The door to the garage is open and I spot a bright window with a red curtain. As I approach the window I notice how locked in and stable this dream feels. I think this is going to be a long lucid dream. The window is open and there is no screen. I look outside and see a car port, noticing rain and... is that snow? No. It looks like white flower petals mixed with the rain. I dive out the window head first getting stuck at the waist for a moment. The rain is cold and as I pass under the dripping edge of the carport, cold water runs unpleasantly down my neck. I pause for a moment looking around. There are a lot of DC's milling about and I remember my dream goal. I want to find gray aliens and ask them to show me something cool. I look at a house across the street and focus on a middle-aged lesbian couple kissing on the front steps. I move over to speak to them and for a split second I consider a threesome. Nah not this time. I turn to the woman on the left and grab her shoulders, "Where are the aliens?" She doesn't answer. Instead, her face morphs into a hideously distorted mix of gray alien and human. I pull back and say, "Whoa!" I wait a moment for the transformation to complete, but some external noise wakes me up. My damn cats.

I notice that I am in the position that I thought I was when I was entering the dream so that part was real.

#449 - DILD - 2:48AM

I hit this DILD just before my scheduled WBTB. I almost decided to skip it but I'm really wanting to get another lucid tonight.

Summary:

I wake up in jail wanting a way out. My phone doesn't act right so I do a nose plug. I morph through a screen door and play with a cat. I enjoy a psychedelic night sky with planets and nebulae. One planet was a giant baseball. I play with an inflatable octopus in a fountain and then wake up.

I wake up in jail. I believe it to be jail although it doesn't really looking like it. I'm laying on something uncomfortable, but I ignore it. I am not sure why I am jail. I never think about that I just know that I hate it when I wake up in jail though this has never happened in waking life. Its late morning and I realize I am late for work. I don't rush around to get ready because I am bummed about jail. It's only 30 days and I've nearly done a week but this really sucks. They only let me out to go to work. Why do they do that? I think I should just pay a lawyer and get this thing taken care of. I really want to go home. I consider taking a vacation day so I can do that, but I don't want to get caught and make things worse. Surely, they track me somehow. I see an ad on the floor for a local lawyer. I decide to should call him before I go to work. I look at my cell phone. It's past 9AM. I unlock, but cant get my phone to respond properly. It's acting really random and I notice this as a dream sign. As a matter of fact off this seems really weird. I do a nose plug and I am relieved to blow through. Whoo-hoo! Problem solved!

I hop up and notice I am some version of an old house of mine. I want out and the first thing I see is a window screen. I try phasing but the screen distorts my vision too much. I look left and see a screen door, but I don't think to open it. I try to phase, but the same thing happens. I suddenly recall to practice eye movement and I get a left-right, but quickly my eyes feel like they roll. I shake it off. I see a cat outside and play with it a little by tapping on the screen. It's scared at first, but I will it to respond and it latches on the screen for a second. I laugh and am finally able to relax enough to merge through the screen.

Now that I am outside, I notice it has become dark. I play with the cat a little to stabilize before moving on. I realize I have no goal so I just decide to look at the sky. Dream skys are always super fun and psychedelic. I let out a "wow" when I see a large planet that looks like a baseball with a colorful nebula around it. I hold the cat up and say, "Look cat. That's what the title of this dream will be." The cat doesn't care about that and scrambles to be let down so, I drop the it and forget about it. The baseball planet has vanished now so, I look around the sky some more. Several nebulae appear with multiple planets of every color coming and going. I walk around enjoying this for a long while until I have a bad thought. I wonder if I am really supposed to get getting up for work. I wonder what time it really is. The dream is starting to get unstable again and I feel that I could wake myself up right now. I consider it, but decide to enjoy the dream a little longer.

I look around me and see a strange fountain with something glowing yellow like holographic tentacles. A holographic octopus? When I come near, the hologram vanishes and a cartoonist, inflatable, pink octopus emerges out of the fountain. Amused I grab the octopus by the tentacles and spin around with it. I focus on the horrible humanoid face of the thing as the world spins around me. It's eye are bulging now and I hear a faint muffled scream coming from the thing. It's "alive"? The whole thing is slightly nightmarish, but I find it too funny to be afraid. The dream collapses here and I have a few random images before waking up.

#448 - DILD - 9:28AM

Just a short and sweet entry here... I got to get caught up on some sleep and hit on lucidity. I had actually woke up around 1am and tried sleeping in the recliner to induce lighters sleep, but I seemed to have been too tried to make and difference. Around 5AM the sunlight woke me and I moved back to bed with a sleep mask. I recalled several dreams throughout the night.

Summary:
I am on a bus trip. I see a hotel and stadium with the word "Floriday". I suddenly remember that I was dreaming and do the eye movements practice. The dream quickly falls apart and I try to stabilize. I am fooled by a FA that turns sexual.

I was on a bus ride with several other young men. I felt like I was in high school and recalled my mom said something about letting her know when I'll be back so she can pick me up. We ride through a down town area that I thought might be Madison, Wisconsin, but I become confused when I see a hotel with the word "Floriday" on it. Later we pass a stadium that reads: "Floriday Panthers" in purple and yellow. I wonder if I am in Floria and I try to take a quick picture of the stadium sign, but we are moving too fast. We then pass a city bus stopped on the road and the enter a more wooded area. I suddenly become lucid like I had briefly forgot that I was dreaming and came back. Oh yeah I was dreaming! I am not sure if I had been lucid, lost it, then recovered it, but it sure feels like it. The outside of the bus begins to darken and I quickly search my mind for goals. I recall the first thing was to practice eye movements for a later experiment. As I do it, I realize that I went right-left vs. left-right, but figure it doesn't matter. As I look both ways twice the dream severely distorts and I find myself in a bardo. I try not to wake up and begin clapping and rubbing my hands. After a while I am fooled by a false awakening.

I am next to some alternate version of my wife clapping my hands. I have woke her up and she asks what I am doing. I tell her that I did it (the lucid task). She begins to talk a lot and I tell her to let me try to reenter the dream. She gets quiet, but cuddles to me and I realize she is naked waste down. I'm really focused on DEILD, but she quickly convinces me to have sex. I wake up just as we get started.

#447 - ? - 4:44AM

Originally Posted by tl;dr

I was somehow lucid in the void and decided to have a lightsaber battle as Darth Vader. I started in a TIE fighter but ended dueling on some small floating platform over cloud city. The battle seemed planned and I got bored so I killed the Jedi.Another Jedi surprises me with an attack to my ankle. The pain wakes me up.

I am at a low level of lucidity while floating in the dream bardo (void). For whatever reason, I have Star Wars on my mind and I seriously want a light saber battle. I am not sure how to get it started so I just say the mantra, "I am Darth Vader.", until something takes shape. First I am in the cockpit of a TIE fighter in a low orbit over some very cloudy planet. For the briefest moment, I marvel the curved horizon, but tell myself not to get lost in the details because, I know that space flight can get very tricky when I worry too much about visuals. Next, I get some imagery of myself morphing from Lord Vader to a Stormtrooper and It becomes very confusing. Luckily, I am able to shake it off as I focus on descending to the surface of the unknown planet.

As my view tilts downward, I am suddenly out of the spacecraft and floating on a type of saucer-shaped, floating platform just big enough to stand on. I am above a very thick and infinite cloud barrier expecting to battle and I quickly search out a Jedi to attack. There is on that looks similar to my Co-Worker B on another floating platform. I move into attack as I flick my wrist and blind summon a lightsaber. I briefly heard the signature sound and see a red beam, then it vanishes. Again, I remember this is normal for me and I remind myself not to get caught up on the eye candy. The feeling of the lightsaber is very vivid in my hand as I swing to attack the man from behind. He turns to parry my attack just in time. I make several efforts to hit, but each one it deflected with ease. Both of our light sabers seem invisible until me make contact. Then, and only then, are our weapons visible and bright with the appropriate sound effects. I am disappointed with the battle and I get the sense of dueling my shadow. Each attack feels forced and each parry feels planned. I quickly tire of this and maneuver my feet back and out , aking an arching motion, causing me to spin around the Jedi and allowing me to quickly thrust my lightsaber into his left shoulder blade. There is some hesitation of the visual, but I force this one wanting to see my energy blade push out his chest. His sword arm relaxes and I catch his lightsaber, quickly pocketing it like some souvenir that I'll never get to appreciate.

Before I have another thought, a second and identical Jedi attacks from my left. He zooms past me and deftly stabs a large hole in my right ankle. There isn't any sensation until he unexpectedly puts two fingers into my wound and lets his weight hang on my leg. An agonizing dull ache shoots up my leg and causes me to wake up.

#445 - DILD - ???

OK I'll keep this entry super short and summarized because it was a total flop are far are lucid dreams go.

I have a strange bathroom experience with the toilets flushing by themselves and the usual public restroom oddness I bounce from this to having repeated false awakenings over and over and eventually do a nose plug. I have a type of in-dream-WILD and get out of bed. The dream is extremely unstable and I do my best to stabilize. I eventually find myself admiring some super detailed but, very plastic, wood veneer before giving up on the dream totally thinking that I ran out of REM cycle. Of course, I go on to having some other super vivid and detailed non lucid dream soon after.

#445 - DEILD - 7:45AM

The Monday got me this morning and I just said to heck with it, I'll go in at 9 and sleep a little more.

I am dreaming and laying in some sort of box with dirt in it in the gutter. There's some tube running off of some part of my body to drain something out. I feel the worst depression I've ever known and I decide to just lay there until I die. I really want to die. The thought of it moving on feels like a great relief. Then, I think that I should at least try to get lucid while I am lying her and this partially wakes me up.

I focus on body relaxation and vibes start. I try getting out but it feels off somehow so I go more visual and find that I am walking in the house. I feel the presence of my wife or someone (but it feels like her energy) following close behind me but I can't see her. It's comforting. I step out the front door and all my depression drops away and is replaced with a feeling of bliss. The air is pleasantly cool and I am delighted that I had an OBE. It has been forever. There is a light snow on the ground and the dream is unstable so I roll around in it. I still feel my wife near me watching over me like a guardian. I love it. The birds are singing loud and clear and it is the most beautiful bird sound. Everything feels like heaven and I enjoy every second of this visually unstable dream. I soon wake up.

#444 - DILD - 6:19AM

Meant to WBTB but somehow missed my alarm. Been doing daytime affirmations.

Originally Posted by tl;dr

I watched Bill Hicks do a WILD, but realized it was my dream when I found a post-it note that read, "JOKE". The letters then morphed into "This is a dream Mike" I got lucid and thanked Bill as he left me. I asked him to do this all the time and he said he would. I then found a bar in the department store I was in and ordered an appletini and woke up after I drank it.

This dream was longer at the begging, but recall is tough there. Some stuff happened at some gathering. The men left the women to go gamble. Something about the women feeling neglected and alone. They are all sitting in bleachers. Some guy lost all his money. One guy shows up and opened a duffel bag full of money. He gives hand fulls of cash to his wife while on one knee as a sort of peace offering. I am watching all of this like it's a movie. The camera floats past the big winner and and pans out to a birds eye view of the gym. Bill Hicks walks up and addresses the large group of women, "You know... I can here to gamble and eat meatball subs, but when I noticed the subs were only 55 cents, I knew there was a reason for it [I was going to lose all of my money]. Now what I am going to do is lay here and use the dream state to sleep with all of you." He pulls out a sleeping bad out of nowhere and lays on his back. I have a close up view of him closing his eyes and concentrating. I think how awesome it would be to just LD a will like this. The scene darkens for a moment.

I now have a first person view of some office. I think I am seeing Bill's dream through his eyes. I think wow he just went straight into the dream. I look around and see the word "Private" on a frosted glass door. The letters morph off at the end and read, "This is a dream." I think, "Wow he just set that scene up so he would get lucid right away." I exit out of the door and see a post-it note on the wall. It reads, "JOKE" then the letters all split and morph and I slowly read them out as they do. I find myself saying, "This is a dream Mike." I think, "Mike!?" The letters are solid and don't morph. "MIKE" This personal message makes me realize I am in my own dream and become fully lucid.

I look around and see that I am a clothing store similar to JC Penny's. I see Bill Hick's looking at me as he exits a nearby door. I shout out, "Thanks for the note!"
He smiles and waves.
Hopeful, I add, "Will you do this for me every time?"
He's outside now, but I see and hear him yell back through the glass, "Yep I will." (I'm holding you to your promise Bill!)
I fist pump and let out a long whispered, "Yessssssss!" I am so happy he said he would do that. I now look around the store just excited to be in a stable lucid dream. I shout out some random things about being in a dream. The feeling of using my voice is so vivid and I marvel how I'm really quietly laying in bed. Just being here is a true miracle.

I start thinking about goals, but nothing comes to mind. There is a bar in the store and I decide to have a lucid drink of alcohol. As I take a seat at stool I see a bartender dressed in white wiping down a glass. I think maybe I want to try a pickletini, but I know that I've never had one in waking life so it's sort of pointless to see if I like it here. I remember that I have really been wanting an appletini lately so I say, "Just give me an appletini." The bartender summons a drink from his hand and slides a martini glass full of clear liquid and a green apple slice sitting in the bottom. I catch it and down it in one gulp forgetting about the apple chunk. At first there is no flavor or sensation so I decide to conjure up the taste. I immediately get the after taste of green apple candy. Not bad. I turn and walk away and the dream started to go dark. I focus on relaxing my body and holding still for DEILD, but my physical eyes uncontrollably flutter open and I fully wake up.

#443 - DILD - 5:01AM


This dream was from Monday morning...

I'm enjoying keeping my entries short and to the point with less detail. It makes it easier for lazy slugs like me to read. Not much happened in this dream anyway. I've really got to get a high level LD soon.

I find some acoustic guitars in a church. My mom tells me to take one since they aren't being used. I chose one and begin to play. It feels random, but sound amazing. Everyone claps for me.

I recognize the dream sign and become lucid. I almost lose the dream but I manage to concentrate and reenter. My memory gets foggy and all I can recall is looking at some colorful gift bags thinking on goals. For some reason I think that I was to trace something in the air. I make some shape in the air with my finger and I see a silver trail of light follow and then vanish. Someone looks at me with a knowing look. I think I am doing the wrong task and I wake up.

I later dream non lucid about being a traveling businessman with way too many sexual hookups. I keep telling the women that I love them, but I seem to just want to "hit it and quit it". There was some drama on an airplane with some woman.

#442 - DILD - 1:51AM

I went to bed super early but ended up with restless legs at midnight. I took 5mg Valium and returned to bed.

I am looking out a second story window with my son. Two cigar shaped aircraft hover in the sky. One lands in the yard and the other smacks the window. I realize they are just funny looking drones. I inspect the glass but find no cracks even though I am sure I heard it break. I see two boys with remotes controls across the street and I try to use my phone to record them as evidence just in case they really did damage my house. I can't get my phone to work right and I see a girl trying to get her cat on part of the roof. Somehow all of this triggers lucidity and I run down the stairs and out the front door to interact with the kids. It's now night time and they all scatter as I fly around the yard. I see the girl run in my front door so I go back after her. My cat is always trying to get out in waking life and it was no different in the dream world. I set her outside and let her run thinking this will somehow benefit her in waking life. I can't find the girl in the darkness of my house and I wonder if she phased out a wall. I see my wife in the kitchen and the dream darkens. I try to maintain but lose out to a false awakening. I enter my dream in my DJ and skip forward to work where I tell B that I got lucid last night and it was awesome. I wake up.

A lot more happened in the dream, but my recall was weak and I don't feel like adding details. I had a few other super vivid and interesting dreams until I had to get up for work.

#441 - DILD - 10:39PM

I normally wouldn't count this, but a rare thing happened. I got a DILD literally within the first few minutes of sleep.

I was at work talking to my buddy while he was doing some work on a machine. I'm not sure we were having any real conversation, I think it was just random thought words. I noticed I was feeling odd, like heavy bodied and sluggish. I realized this as a dream sign and said, "Dude, I think I am dreaming." When I said that I uncontrollably slumped over and the dream went dark. I tried to hold on, but I slowly woke up.

#440 - DILD - 3:31AM

I am at work lying on the floor. Bob is talking to someone, but I can't make out what he is saying. I stand up and notice how blurry the environment is and decide that all of this means I am dreaming. The dream feels very early like I nearly did a WILD. I look at my and then feel object to stabilize. I end up feeling church pews and I am in a small church from my past as the dream clears up.

Everything still feels unsteady, but I see my Mother-In-Law praying in her seat. She has a cup of coffee next to her so I decide to test how real it is for me. The temperature is lukewarm and there is no taste or sensation. I see my MIL has moved to kneel at the alter. I follow and put the coffee down next to her. She then moves back to her seat. I think about leaving the church, but I feel the dream would crash so I just play this out the best I can. I get up on stage and sing Glory Glory Halleluiah. I get the first line out, but I'm just not feeling religious right now. I have a false memory of wanting to ask a DC a question about the meaning of life (or was this a really old TOTM?). I rush to my MIL and ask, "What is the secret meaning of life?"
She looks confused and slightly afraid, "I have no clue!" She runs away from me and I shout after her, "Well, there's and honest answer!" I am really glad I didn't get some gibberish that I wold have to try to decode. I wake up.

5:13AM - There was some conversation with Vinny then, I find myself wrapping gauze around my head chin to crown. After several seconds, I feel someone tap my chin sharply which wakes me up with a startle. I have no clue if it was a dream sensation, my own hands moving with the dream, or a ghost in the room! I wasn't scared just really curious what happened. I still am.

5:56am - about to do some drugs with a group of teenagers. We have a lot of conversation about it. I try to look up some information but I can't get my password to work on my phone.

Just a quick post to record a LD I had a few nights ago...

I am with old friend Carrie at her house. There are streams running from room to room and we are riding inner tubes. We are having some conversation, but get interrupted by a phone call. As she talks I look around and notice that we are flowing out the front door into a river. I look around then up. I see the day time moon with a shining set of rings around it. The rings start rotating around and I recognize this dream sign (odd things in the sky) and I know that I am dreaming.

I notice that my wife is now with us on her own inner tube. Being lucid I think that I should do something with this dream so I stand up in the water and try to think. While I stand there my wife goes into the water and starts sucking my finger. I pull my hand away and then put it back. She starts sucking again and I absentmindedly feel around in her mouth. I am so shocked that I don't even know what to do with this dream. I just stand there unable to think with my finger in her mouth until I wake up.