I wake up from my coffin. I am Soulkyst the Vampire.
I summon Jo, my astral pet, and he morphs into a stretch vampire dragster. I play Dragula by Rob Zombie. I pick up Koomo, Red, and Loaf. Red, Loaf and I are all vampires.
Where are we going? To meet the Vampire King!
Angel gets in.
I drive. Raven and MoSh appear in the vehicle. We drive to Spike's castle. WarriorTiger is the gate guard. She is armored up like a paladin. She opens her helmet. She has fangs. What took you so long. Silverwolf appears in a long black dress. She says she is a vampire witch.
We are all vampires.
We meet Spike and sit down at a long table. We are served colored balls of energy. Loaf says he wants BLOOD. Spike laughs. Spike gives us training in combat.
We learn a teleport lunge attack.
Then, spiked knuckles training.
Then, casting Fear.
Then, absorbing all energy and directing it back at the enemy. Spike calls it Vampiric Whiplash.
Then, Heart Kick, which kicks a hole in the enemy's chest. Red wakes up. Oh well.
Loaf is attacking the training targets savagely. Spike says that he can use his vampire form on DC's to absorb their energy to get stronger, and also to dispel dark energy in a controlled manner. He says Loaf is a born vampire, or actually, born a vampire.
A vampire calling himself Demo and covered in weapons, sword, guns, and bombs says he's going to give Loaf special training.
We watch Demo and Loaf battle. Demo wins 3-1-1. Demo says that Loaf must be good to even defeat him and tie him one round.
We go to my Vampire Castle in the Land of Nod. MoSh says, "I don't believe I am a vampire."
I show him a mirror. "You're not."
He sees his fangs. At first he is startled, then he laughs. Asuka appears and puts her arms around him. Her face is painted white. She grins, and two fangs appear. She says everything is okay.
WarriorTiger points at the rising sun. We laugh at it, for the sun has no effect on us. WT grabs Silverwolf and makes out with her. Spike makes two DC's disappear that were massaging his feet. Hey says to Raven, "C'mere, love." She sits on his lap, and they disappear.
We watch the sun rise silently. MoSh says he's going to forget this dream because he doesn't really want to be a vampire. Loaf says, "You're an idiot. Being a vampire is ME. And, I'm not going to remember this dream, which really pisses me off."
MoSh snarls at him, and Loaf goes silent. I throw mantra balls at them. MoSh uses Whiplash so it hits me instead. Loaf eats his. He says it tastes like chocolate blood cake. WTF. Loaf says he's still not going to remember this dream.
Why not?
Because, I'm not lucid.
You are dreaming.
No, I am not, this is a fantasy.
ARRRGH!
I pounce on Loaf and bite him. NOW REMEMBER THIS DREAM. He looks shocked, and he wakes up.
Me: You think he will remember this dream.
MoSH: No. Maybe Raven will... Spike will, of course. Where did Silverwolf and WarriorTiger go?
They are now wolves walking in circles around us. They look hungry. I summon two slabs of elk and toss it to them.
MoSh: They won't, look they're in Beast Form. Asuka will, maybe you will, but I just can't get lucid right now.
WHY NOT?
MoSh: Because dude, I don't want to be a vampire. I already told you.
FINE!
I fly away. I shoot a mantra ball at MoSH with a Nerf gun. He whiplashes it back.
I fly at him to attack. He somehow freezes me, but I can move my eyes. He makes a portal and he and Asuka step through. I fall to the ground.
Angel laughs and says,"What a weird fucking dream, huh?"
I rub my head. "Yeah."
|
|
Bookmarks