Thread: DCs Say the Darndest Things

Guys..guys.. it's just that I don't see that this thread has anything to do with LDing. IMO it should be in the "General Dream Discussion" forum. 95% of the stuff described here is normal non-lucid chaos.

Just my opinion.

Originally Posted by Oneiro

Guys..guys.. it's just that I don't see that this thread has anything to do with LDing. IMO it should be in the "General Dream Discussion" forum. 95% of the stuff described here is normal non-lucid chaos.

Just my opinion.

Yea I noticed that also but the way you worded it was a little too angry lol. I agree that it should be moved to General Dream Discussion

Lady-in-charge: Ha! Do you really think the referee would listen to you?

Haha, that's pretty funny! That lady sure didn't like you.

Vladimir Putin, "I do not have the socks that you requested."

LOL, I just saw that one. That's hilarious!

In a recent dream I had applied for some sort of license. The responsible authority send me some sort of computer message (it was on a computer screen, could have been e-mail). It said: “Either you can carry this responibility or this logic doesn’t need a hint.”

I don't get it …

Last night, in one of my dreams:

“Miss.” The Government Agents say sternly, “Was that a…baboon we saw on your shoulder?”

“Yes.” I reply.

“Miss, are you aware that it is illegal to carry a baboon?” One asks.

“Ummm…no. No I didn’t.”

They look at each other like…’Yeah right.’ Then they say: “Have you taken the test?”

“What test?” I ask.

“The new standardized test. It tells us whether you have the basic knowledge needed to be a citizen or not.”

“No. I haven’t taken it.” I say, uncertain of what they’re talking about. They direct me to the boulder, and behind it there’s a computer kiosk. They say I have to take the test or I will be in violation of such and such law and such and such law. They leave me to the kiosk and I take the test. Its really easy, with questions like “Which came first: Dinosaurs, Baboons, Chickens, or humans?” I think I get a really great score, but suddenly the results print out and I got a 5%! Suddenly the guys are there and they have me be either arm and are dragging me away. “You’re under arrest,” They said “For lacking basic intelligence and carrying a baboon in a public place.”

I was in my bed watching the playboy manchine. My roomate is sleeping, and I continue watching. Then my roomate tells me

roomate- stop thumpn it. *he is now in his chair dressed and ready to leave
Me- where are you going
He takes his dirty clothes and puts them in my hamper
roomate- Hawii

Here's another one
I was sitting in my family room at my house with my family. My Grandpa is sitting next to me. Smoke gets in my face and starts making me cough. I look over at him and he was smoking a pipe and he says...

Gandpa-sorry did I pass my gas? he said it with a laugh.

Last night, in one of my dreams:

“Miss.” The Government Agents say sternly, “Was that a…baboon we saw on your shoulder?”

“Yes.” I reply.

“Miss, are you aware that it is illegal to carry a baboon?” One asks.

“Ummm…no. No I didn’t.”

They look at each other like…’Yeah right.’ Then they say: “Have you taken the test?”

“What test?” I ask.

“The new standardized test. It tells us whether you have the basic knowledge needed to be a citizen or not.”

“No. I haven’t taken it.” I say, uncertain of what they’re talking about. They direct me to the boulder, and behind it there’s a computer kiosk. They say I have to take the test or I will be in violation of such and such law and such and such law. They leave me to the kiosk and I take the test. Its really easy, with questions like “Which came first: Dinosaurs, Baboons, Chickens, or humans?” I think I get a really great score, but suddenly the results print out and I got a 5%! Suddenly the guys are there and they have me be either arm and are dragging me away. “You’re under arrest,” They said “For lacking basic intelligence and carrying a baboon in a public place.”

That's hilarious! It sounds more like a dumb tv show than a dream!

From my dream last night:

"The whole Vogue video game thing, totally not working for me."

(She meant like it's just stupid, but she said it in a very stuck-up way. In my dream Vogue was a book that had apparently been made into a video game.)

The funniest thing (for me anyway), is that this was said by my friend, who NEVER talks like that in real life.

In my dream, one of my father's business associates was talking about his last doctor's appointment.

He said: "...the doctor told me I had to lose weight. And he didn't just like tell me to go jogging, he gave me all these other exercises to do, and he told me to eat two ounces of bacon a day. That's four dollars!"

...

In real life, my grandma gave me $50 for my birthday. Here is the dream:
I am walking along the sidewalk and I see my grandma walking towards me. I run up to her and thank her for the $50. She says "There is a lot more where that came from. I still have $17,000 left in my bank account!" I'm like 'wow' even though $17,000 doesn't seem like much.

How is that funny? Are you going to kill your grandma?

that's one of my mythological dreams.

i was fasting 2 days. (well... partly, for i was nursing my baby-daughter.) that day my partner joined my fast.

dreamed 3 spaceships landed, lit projectors, crossing rays of green lights on me, which paralyzed me. unable to move, i woke.
fell asleep, dreamed another space ship landed, a creature got out of it, no light. i fought it with cat-like movements. suddenly i heard a voice in my mind saying (Hebrew with funny American accent): "and now, back to grey everyday reality!" "who is this?" i tried to find - recognized my partner (who used to speak crazy stuff in this funny accent) - bursting into laughter, i woke.

that's one of my mythological dreams.

i was fasting 2 days. (well... partly, for i was nersing my baby-daughter.) that day my partner joined my fast.

dreamed 3 spacesheeps landed, lit projectors, crossing rays of green lights on me, which paralized me. unable to move, i woke.
fell asleep, dreamed another space sheep landed, a creature got out of it, no light. i fought it with cat-like movements. suddenly i heard a voice in my mind saying (Hebrew with funny american accent): "and now, back to grey everyday reality!" "who is this?" i tryed to find - recognized my partner (wh used to speak crazy stuff in this funny accent) - bursting into laufter, i woke.

Originally Posted by 1342576

How is that funny? Are you going to kill your grandma?

Dear stupid:
It's funny because she made it sound like her having $17,000 is a lot of money when it really isn't She has a house worth over 100 grand and two cars and probably about half a million in her bank account.

I don't know of this fits, but here's something hilarious from a recent dream of mine. Okay, this happened one of my dreams two nights ago. I was in a barricaded house that was surrounded and being attacked by gigantic apes (think of a cross between the creatures from Shadow of the Colossus and rabid, carnivorous king-kong's), and me and some DC's were hiding in the basement. They didn't know how to escape, as seeing that the gigantic killer apes had ripped to shreds a couple of DC's already. I instantly realized that I was dreaming, and one of the DC's came to the rest of us explaining how to escape:

"I have a solution! We can use this chimpanzee doll to teleport to our neighbor's house, because everybody knows that monkey's can teleport!"

So I just rescued three ferrets from something I can't remember. I put them down. They're not moving. One is completely dismembered - its skin folds back like an upside-down bear rug and its organs are spilling out. I'm crying. It *has* to live. It just *has* to. "Please... oh god, is it breathing?"

An onlooker rolls her eyes. "Does it LOOK like it's breathing to you?"

It's cold outside, snowing... freezing a lot harder, suddenly, I can see the ice crystals sparkling on the pavement. I have a blade (not a long sword, some kind of long, beautifully crafted dagger) which I decide to sharpen, using the frosted-over pavement. It works really well, to my amazement, but I'm not sure if it's sharp enough already.

"Do you think I should sharpen it further?" I ask a DC who's standing by, waiting for me.

He puts the blade into his mouth and tests the edges with his tongue (!)

"No, I think this is quite sharp enough..."

lol, I was siting on this bench and this guy comes up to me and goes you know the deal so I give him my wallet and cash than he goes "oh shit a drive by" and runs away (a car pulls up)
----------------
I was in a house on a big rock, on the end of a clif holded up by a long pointed rock and I started jumping inside and the house moved and fel into the water (hard to explain lol) everyone got pissed and me and i think they drowned

Originally Posted by hankwheels

Dear stupid:
It's funny because she made it sound like her having $17,000 is a lot of money when it really isn't She has a house worth over 100 grand and two cars and probably about half a million in her bank account.

half mill in the bank but only 100 thousand dollar house? weird and you mean 17gs isn't alot for a retired person right? not like in general. because if you mean in general.... are you're parents rich?.... just wondering not starting shit

Originally Posted by JoannaGreenleaf

It's cold outside, snowing... freezing a lot harder, suddenly, I can see the ice crystals sparkling on the pavement. I have a blade (not a long sword, some kind of long, beautifully crafted dagger) which I decide to sharpen, using the frosted-over pavement. It works really well, to my amazement, but I'm not sure if it's sharp enough already.

"Do you think I should sharpen it further?" I ask a DC who's standing by, waiting for me.

He puts the blade into his mouth and tests the edges with his tongue (!)

"No, I think this is quite sharp enough..."

Tee heehehe!! Haha.

Originally Posted by hankwheels

Dear stupid:
It's funny because she made it sound like her having $17,000 is a lot of money when it really isn't .

...

lol if I had 17,000 USD I'd be like jumping in happiness xD

Not that easy to get money in Brazil.

I agree with Kromoh (even though i don't live in Brazil) 17,000 dollars is a lot of money!