holy crap

you spent 12 days journal, then months in funk, then 8 days in Hawaii with LeBerge
with such dedication, and then willingness to spend money

I change my recommendation
start buying EILD stuff

get a Basis Peak to track your sleep cycles and stuff
maybe the Rem Dreamer from Europe to help you initiate
(tho a new user reported he had bought one and it never shipped to him)
I should of course buy these things myself but I'm too cheap at the moment

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