Vesterguard

non-lucid - Notes - lucid

Following dreams occured between 30th Sep - 05th of Oct. I have written up some of the recordings I had lying around. Amazing what this device can do for recall, I get taken back to the dreams while listening, though on the flip side it makes me lazy in writing them up and sharing them.

Date unknown:

“Freaking Lifts!!!... Where is the toilet?”

I am at a concert with Belá Fleck and the Flecktones and I leave this because I have to go to the toilet before heading back to bed? I am walking back into the concert hall and the encore has just finished and I am hoping that I can get out before all the people start leaving.

Everything goes wrong, the first toilet is taken so I go to take the lift to go upstairs, which I can't due to there being a girl in it who goes up. I end up taking the stairs. I come upstairs and press the lift button again and find out that the toilet is taken again so now I go back into the lift.

Here the girl apologise to me for leaving me downstairs before. I then take the lift down and realise I wasn't supposed to go down so I drive up again. I am starting to get angry at this point and I vent my frustration on the lift by punching the mirrored walls, which crack. I am a bit embarassed by this as well as not willing to pay for it so I quickly walk out when I get upstairs.

There is a staircase going up to the second floor and it is possible to see in between the steps of this staircase. I am trying to do some exercise by pulling myself up, but only with one arm which makes the endeavour difficult.

I am talking to Shang in my flat, she is talking about some Ida girl, which I believe to refer to Natasja of my study. The setting is rather dark lit by artificial lighting. Shang is questioning why Ida/Nat doesn't find any of the men that are really elegant guys boyfriend material.

Aurelie is in fact talking about Nat in an odd way. She describes her as sort of a puppet, meaning that all her emotional ties are with a guy back home far away from the current study environment she is in at the moment. I am disappointed in Aurelie that she doesn't consider me a valid boyfriend candidate for Nat.

Notes: Has been quite some time since I had this dream and there is some character confusion between Aurelie and Shang, though Shang definitely is the one I consider girlfriend material and is faffing around with the lights.

I then proceed to talk to Shang and tell her that it sounds pretty much like the situation she used to be in. Shang then goes on to explain that a friend of hers found something in the book (a diary of sorts?) and that she was afraid that it would be discovered and taken the wrong way.

At this point I stop to think that seeing as she no longer has a boyfriend it might be a good time to make a move. I am looking at her as she is trying to switch on the lights in the bathroom and the hallway in between. The lights doesn't seem to be working and she hasn't realised that I am standing there observing her, wearing a towel wrapped around my waist. I find her rather cute as she can't quite figure out what is going wrong.

Skip

Something about Shang's lenses and an inability to see.

Skip

I am on the internet looking at something that has the interface of the IOSDP forum threads, but it is actually a research project on photo recognition of the self, which reminds me that I want to do research myself.
…........

“Mitzu, tell me how to do portals.. no.. not today.. okay then”

I am having a series of false awakenings somewhere in the region of 4-5. Teri McB came down to me and talked to me about Lucid Dreaming. She just had her second. Just after this I have a FA.

The reality check fails and I look at some plates standing around on the sofa and other where. I try and move them telekinetically and they sort of just slightly vibrate. I manage to get hold of a fork though that I pull towards me and throw it into a window, which creates a little dent and shard. I then go and punch the window, nothing happens the first time then on the second the window blows outwards.

There is a bit of wind and then I go and call Teri asking if she wants to come along and join in on this lucid. I go into the window and shout out “why is it so cold?” which makes the cold disappear.

I jump out of the window, not really flying my control is shit but then again it is the first lucid I have had in quite some time. There is really a lack of control going on. I walk around touching up my flat and try biting off bits of my plants, which are way bigger than they normally are. I remember a distinct bitter taste of a “paradise tree” and think you aren't supposed to eat these even in dreams (unsure about the translation).

When down on the ground I call out for Mitzu. I expect her to be behind me. When she comes around I see she is wearing this grey night gown and looks older than she has done before.

I say “Right, Portals!? Tell me, what is going on?” She is reluctant to tell me she doesn't want to teach me at this point in time because there is so much other positive stuff going on in my dreams at this point in time. Bad timing.

I think I might have primed this myself thinking it beforehand not really going in with an open mind regarding what answer I would get. I know what she is referring to though.

FA: I wake up and start talking into my dicta phone.

Notes: I suspect that me transferring to using the dicta phone is actually having an effect on my dreams. I seem to have loads of FAs since starting using it. Potentially this could be due to activations of a brain networks, associated with linguistic performance and speech mediated consciousness, leading to increased cerebral activation.

Skip

Looking at this television show about a guy in the 80es trying to prove lucid dreaming (Called Gray/Grey/Graham?) and he is talking into a dicta phone exactly like mine. But it is an older model. This theory or prove is hidden, the media doesn't want to show it. The media interpret that it is just a guy having done something strange with a bible, and his dream reports are narratives of Jesus leaving a coliseum.

FA: Look at my hands and have a short little lucid where I walk around trying to stabilise the dream.
….........

“Skelly Closets”

I have an actual skeleton lying in my kitchen closet and all the bones are cleaned out. I have to go and show them to one of my really old friends, I for some reason crave his approval.

I run outside and it is really rather windy and wet outside. People are dressed up going to a Halloween party or the like, my mate also is dressed up.

I end up grabbing the skull and just wearing it over my neck like a necklace. I am walking down the street. Something about a programme in which Ryan Reynolds is discussing stupid superhero moves or similar.
…..........

“Spliffs and trains”

I am in a train with Mark and Drew. We are talking about various things, Mark in particular is quite chatty and he has something important he wants to tell me though I recall not what it was. Drew is looking around to see if he should pull out the spliff and light it up, but he decides not to.

The train looks rather luxurious with blue coloured and wooden seatings. Looks like an old school dining wagon, but with more modern seating arrangements without the tables and such, but really high quality.

At one point we drive past another train and I am surprised to find that this train is actually driving in the same direction as us and we are overtaking it.

Upon leaving the train I realise I have left some of my baggage so I run back into the train looking through all the cupboards multiple times to see if I can find it. Thomas M is there as well looking for his baggage and ends up finding his suitcase in a cupboard where I also find, what I believe to be my baggage though I am not entirely sure it is actually mine.

We get outside on the station and everyone is gone. I am unsure of where to go.
…...............

“Piquant Talk Show”

There is a TV show. It reminds me of your average talk show with a host sat behind a desk and guests appearing from the left hand side of the screen.

The host presents his next guest which is Hermione, or at least it is supposed to be her, but it is actually a girl from my study. While normally you would see the cameras zoom out and film the guest entering the studio this doesn't happen though it is supposed to. Due to technical difficultise what you see is the face of the host and the rest of the screen turns into bright multi coloured non-specific patterns.

When sat there they start joking around about what they did on the set. The host is rather geeky looking and they had a joke running about this. They stand up and she “kisses” him on the forehead without actually touching his skin. Instead of an actual kiss to the forehead she just blows some wind in his face.

The host proclaim that this was how he felt like in school, which they apparently attended together, where he was also quite the geek. They then stand up again but this time rather passionately licks his face and grabs his crouch while doing all sorts of things.

When they zoom out again, after the kiss which lasts for quite some time, they then zoom into his crouch area again and it is clearly visible that the man has quite the boner going for himself. Then he pulls out his cock and she starts massaging it.

After this she bends over on his chair asking to be pleased. He removes her dress and find that underneath she is wearing this fishnet type clothing. She asks to be licked and he tries doing this while she is still wearing the net, but gives up and removes it.

He then starts pounding her from behind and the camera goes underneath them to show some revealing footage of him wearing a condom, the action and the moistness of her vagina. It turns to slow motion.

non-lucid - Notes - lucid

13-09-11 I am lying in my bed and I can hear Silas talking to someone, a dream entitiy. For some reason I think he is talking about a location I know and that he is part of IOSDP. I keep thinking windmill, which is then repeated by the dream entity and he talks about bikes as well. I think I know the location he is talking about so I think hard about Vesterguard, and this is eventually repeated by the dream entity as well, first as guard and then the full name.

Not sure if the above section was a FA or HH → pre REM dreaming.

I am lucid and the dream starts forming. I am in the sea, swimming around unable to get to shore, know I am dreaming, but my vision is blurry and I have limited control. I see light in the horizon out over the water and what would be a sea port town. I eventually stabilise the dream through breathing.

I am waiting for Silas or ”Crusher” (definitely a name with a C, though I will refer to him as Silas from now on) or whatever to get out of the water. I decide to finish off the TotM tasks. Walking on water was simple enough have, but I have to try a bit harder to pull out a ball of water from the ocean mentally, the water keeps rippling where I try and pull out the ball, and sling it maybe 20 metre in a forward arch (this is what I tried to do in the first lucid I had, but got interrupted).

Silas comes into shore and I take him to the place I thought was the place, but it turns out he doesn't recognise it it. We talk a bit about us both being new to this whole IOSDP thing and that we will just continue marching on writing down our stuff and trying to meet.

Silas takes off and I try and do a cool back flip onto a little hut, that turns into a chest in my grand father's house, albeit a very tall chest and the back flip is sub par. I jump down and someone is using a crowbar to tear through a thin wall.

”We have nearly destroyed my grand mother's house” I say, think to either Silas or the person using the crowbar. I am in the basement and I say ”Well, see you around” and try and fly out, but can't get through the walls or windows, I try and open the windows and now I have the crowbar, they are too small, I try another one and get stuck looking at some girl/woman who I tell I have been playing around and stuff. She tells me I have been playing with (don't recall name) a baby girl, because apparently I have colour in my face.

Notes: Though lucid the entire time even with access to waking memory (cf. The TotM tasks) I don't realise that I am talking to Silas, a TV show character and treat him as a member of the IOSDP. Aside from that the control I had in this dream was horrible apart from the TotM stuff.
…

I am in possession of copious amounts of weed, bags that would indicate in the kilos. This particular theme is recurring over what I believe to be a series of dreams. But it is all very fragmented.

I get back from a party and I am pretty pissed, I think I try and skin up without much success.

I pick up some weed somewhere and bring it to a friends house, which results in the house getting raided as I bought it of the mum of the girl I was visiting and the dealer didn't want weed around her daughter.

I run into an old female friend of mine from way back, who explains that they have gone out to town recently where they brought “the other Rasmus” and Sisse and they ended up hooking up and having sex. I was surprised to find that this actually hurt considering it was 8 years ago and that I was only with her for 3 months approximately.

I return to the first girl's house where I find that the weed I brought the night before is still there. I start making a roach and look for paper. I have some in my pocket, but it is all crumbled up and I am unsure if the clue will stick. Doesn't matter in the end I find some on the table. The roach becomes really weird and some woman calls me from downstairs before I can roll a spliff.

I am talking to a friend who have found a stash of wed of maybe 3 kilos. He is talking about how it is located in a residential area and he has seen it quite some times just lying there. He argues we could make some profit of it by starting to sell a bit.

We are under a bridge with graffiti on the wall and in a room which looks sterilised and metallic, though shaped like a container on the inside. This is where the aforementioned 3 kilos of weed is. We get busted and try and explain that we could sell for the dealer, but he doesn't care explains that he deals in larger lumps and as far as he is aware all we do is owe him and eights.
…

In a sauna/steam room with a lot of men and I am about to fight my dad. I keep placing well placed uppercuts. He warns me that he will get going soon, there isn't a lot of room to move and I am afraid of bumping into other naked men.
…

Kaiser complementing my new jacket and informing me that he will start shopping in second hand shops as well.

08-09-11 I am standing in a tent on field. The field is filled with dandelions and I am starting to tear up the flowers with root and I do this quite frantically. Eventually other people start joining in until there are no flowers left. However as I go along I start pulling them up less careful about getting all of the root up.

When there are almost no flowers left I start noticing that the earth is moving and that the empty holes are crippling with spiders. I don't get to dwell on this thought as the next I know I find myself under the water in the ocean near the bottom.

I look up behind me and notice a sea snake being dropped into the water by an unknown entity. I start swimming towards the top and I don't know if I am kicking through the snake(s) or not. When I get to the top I find myself close to the shore of a beautiful beach.

It is high sunshine and I am wearing a wetsuit and am carrying a surf board. I have never surfed before, but I manage to catch a pipe (don't know if this is what it is called in surfer terms) on my first ever attempt, which the person with me considers quite the achievement.

I start feeling ill and I fall off the board and find myself in a living room right next to a door out to the hallway. Behind me there is a short haired girl who grabs me around the waist. I am in a different perspective and punch my own chest to start CPR. The perspective shifts back and I shout for someone to call the hospital. Someone runs into the hallway to do this.

The girl pulls me to the floor and Shane of Weeds is standing over me to continue the CPR.

My vision starts fading to grey and I am loosing it, but I hear a voice that tells me to stay here, relax and breathe. After a while my vision starts returning to normal and as I am looking up at one of my living room plants it gradually becomes green again.

After a while longer I can sit up and I look down my leg and notice a large circle. It isn't red and the bite marks from the snake have already healed up. However now we know that we are dealing with a cobra strike and I or someone else shout out into the hallway that the person getting help should tell this.
…

Notes: I remember having two more dreams after this one related to it, though without the nightmare themes. However upon waking up this morning they seem to have vanished from memory.
…

I am in Holland and going into a shop to buy some weed. Someone is with me and I think I am the experienced one and need to show them how it is done.

I walk over to the counter and tell the guy I need the weakest most mellow product he has. He immediately walks to the hash counter and tells his associate to service me.

His associate start dishing out this pink goo onto the counter and explains that this is the most mellow he has. Then the first guy comes over and tells the associate that it wasn't what I asked for that I needed something with a bit more fly to it. He starts pouring some brownish goo onto the counter. Then the associate asks me what I am after, most mellow or something with fly and I quickly explain just mellow.

We all laugh and I think I buy some of the pink stuff.

Skip.

Outside the shop, which looks more like a garage on the outside I run into some shady businesmen who are looking for 2 Pac. As they explain this he appears on the other side of the street wearing a long business like coat looking nothing gangster like at all.

I stop and think to myself that he is dead and that all the conspiracy theorists that predicted his return must have been right. I think to myself that either he came back in 2007 or we are actually in 2007 right now.

The reason they want to talk to him is because he has developed something and the dream shifts into a camera chasing him as he is running through a garden. In the centre of the garden is his invention. It is a crystal that emits some sort of high frequency sound/light combination. This invention has the possibility of performing any know surgery non-invasive.

However it seems like it is overloading and hence 2 Pac and his assistant are running to get to cover. All the while this crystal is pulsing emitting this crystal like sound-light combination. There is loads of colours in this pulse, which is quite sharply contrasted by the grey clouds in the sky.
…

I am in a Sims like situation a person is telling me that he has never seen the stars. I sort of force him to do this. He replies that he has seen them on Youtube, which I find ridiculous.

I run up on a mountain that apparently is the highest location nearby and phone him and tell him he should get up there as there is absolutely no light pollution what so ever.

Besides I am standing right next to Mount Everest and I don't think it would be particularly difficult to reach the top of that either.

Skip.

On a beach now still with the same mission in mind though it is daytime and he will have to wait a while. Another person/Sim is there and he has the trait that he is easily burned and will have to return for sun lotion all the time.

The parents voice sort of explain that he will have to stop playing with me because of this. There are loads of other persons that assemble around me.

I follow the easily burned guy into the house, one of his arms is really red and he is whimpering. He gets sun lotion applied and there is a bar that measures his degree of burntness that goes down with applications of this lotion.

In the house I explain that he needs a hardcore lotion, maybe like one of those for babies and all of a sudden I am in a shop that sells sun lotion, after sun, sun tan amplifier and soap. Among other things the shop also sells katanas relatively cheap.

The shop is run by WakingNomad and he tries to charge me 500 dollars for little test samples in blue bottles. I am annoyed that he charges this much because I know the protection they offer to be exactly what I am looking for, but it is stupidly expensive. I mean the bottles are like the size of small shot bottles.
…

Swimming with the family along the shore of a nice beach in high sunshine.
…

With the family in a house. There are two dogs that keep jumping into the lap of my dad and uncle.

26-08-11 Golf clubs and weed.
…

Something about an ex girlfriend I get into a discussion with in a locker.

I hug the other party in a bed, and try soon enough to disentagle myself as it was only intended as a friendly hug from her.

Peter Scotson from Weeds is the new husband and we talk a bit and defuse the angry bitch.
…

I am in a dark room with Minka, I want to kiss her and be with her and I think I am making an approach, It might get a little intense, though nothing happens. We walk out onto a grass field that normally would be massive and open.

However at the current time it is occupied by a temporary fairgrounds. It is dark, it is night time and the only source of light around is small lights from the various tents and things on the grounds. We walk on the outskirts of the fairgrounds until we spot where we are headed.

There is a circle of people sat in the grass, it is a coven and their leader is sat in the middle facing off against Lafayette (Yep, true blood guy). We may take seats in the circle or I just drift in without my dream body and is sat right next to Lafayette.

Though I might be separate from him, I still am feeling the sense of agency in what he is doing. Their leader, who may be Marney (Antonia, whatever dunno if it is even centred on the vamp theme).

The leader starts summoning a water elemental, and up until now I haven't noticed the puddle of water between Lafayette and her.

The water is muddy and so is the elemental, which isn't big and looks a bit like a statuette climbing out of the water. When it is slightly over half way there Lafayette/me swats it and it crumbles. I am aware that he/me is the only one in the circle with the power to destroy these.

“You will lay the fuck down with **** and ****” (remember the names I do not) Lafayette says and I become aware that he has been thwarting attempts at whatever their leader is trying to do twice before us turning up.

Lafayette/me makes the move to finish off the leader. It is a spell and it is designed to crystallise the fluid in the cells of the eyeballs of the victim, making them burst, a vicious piece of water magic if you ask me.

The spell is fired and I expect the leader to go down. That doesn't happen, when the spell (which isn't as such visible by the way) reach the leader a bright blue flash appears from her neck. The necklace she was wearing wasn't a normal necklace.

The blue light manifests. The spell didn't hit the person, but the tiny faerie (What is with the fucking faeries in my dreams recently!? (btw I am not complaining =P)) enchanted into the necklace. She was immune to the spell and she has dark eyes, pretty much the only thing in her glowing body that is dark.

This is getting out of hand. I am in my dream body now. Not sure if I have become the person that was Lafayette or whatever. I let out a shriek, to warn the people in the fair. These were the people the leader was trying to hurt, so everyone in the coven realise that this might be a prime situation to practice running.

Luckily we are close to the edge of the grounds which is surrounded by bushes. I look out and see Minka already on her way through the bushes. I myself dart after her. It is a fucking pain getting through a piece of bush in utter darkness with human limbs flailing about. I have a plan to sort that out since this is moving way too slowly at any rate.

When I am through to the other side I shout out “Minka!”. I think I feel having her attention and I roar. She gets the message and I see her shifting into a fast animal, I myself shift into a lion(ess?) and feel the powerful muscle (though the speed seems to be lacking a bit).

Minka is a wolf and way ahead of me, but she sense that I can't follow that speed and shift into a lioness as well. I still feel my clothes on my body, which is hindering me a bit, but I don't know what I can shift into that will solve it.

We are running up a hill road, a road that reminds of one in the city I grew up in right next to the town hall. I keep running looking at Minka. At the top of the hill she shifts into a bird, a rather small one, maybe a blackbird or raven (definitely a dark bird, not sure if a raven would be too big, I am a bit far away) and takes off into flight.

I decide to do the same though I am unfamiliar with shifting into flying things. I think Eagle. I shift and leaps and get up a bit, but flying with wings is hard. I keep flapping about, but only just barely manage to keep floating.

Until I realise that I can push forward my legs which will make my wings carry more and provide quite a significant up drive. I fly high, I mean high enough to make me think “Shit this is really high”.

It must look hilarious the way I manage the height of my flight. I push forwards my legs to go up and pull em back to go down while flapping my wings the entire time. I fly over Minka and look down at the brick houses and flat roof tops.

After a short while after this I land in a yard of a small house. The terrace is sort of formed like a playground and I transform into a kangaroo when I land and jump between some of the smaller platforms for the fun of it.

Minka lands shortly after. I go to her, intending on kissing her. She doesn't allow me and says “Dennis”. There may be tears in her voice, she starts talking about how I take risks, like I just did in Eagle form.

“If you went skiing with your dad, would you jump that high” “If you drove a snow scooter, would you make jumps” and things like that. I keep thinking when I dream I fly that high, and eventually she say “When you dream” (Nice one missing the lucidity clue there).

“You don't understand I really care for you...” “but you just don't want me” I think to myself. There is a sense that I take too much risk for her to be interested in me, she might be afraid to get interested in me.

I pick her up and place her on my arm and start walking inside, carrying her like you would a baby. She is still crying.

We get inside and I see her boyfriend/ex boyfriend or whatever he is. “Darly” she says and her crying intensifies. I look at him pleadingly to take her, not because I want to let her go, but because she wants to go to him.

“Great sleeping beauty (or similar)” he says hinting at her crying, but eventually he accepts her and take her in his arms. My niece is sat on the sofa next to him and as soon as he is occupied with Minka she starts crawling out over the sofa, but I anticipated this from before I even handed Minka over to Darly and catch my niece as she starts falling.

I start looking at her while talking to her and they lie down for a short moment on the sofa. Then Minka says “Dennis” again tears in her voice, she seems hurt that I have again handed a love interest into the arms of another man and just let go.

I am slightly hurt, but I channel love into the moment with my niece and try to ignore the other parties in the situation.

She is the only person whose friendly love always shine brighter than the hurt of not being with her.

non-dream - non-lucid - lucid

14-10-10 I am at an open air competition. The point of the competition is to use as many piercing saws as possible to saw through a piece of wood. The sun was shining. I have a feeling Sebastian was there. Also something about marble plates, completely black that couldn't be sawed. Red and yellow power tools.

Notes: Don't get stoned while working on dreams!