JoannaB

In this dream My husband and I had moved back to Bloomington, Indiana. Our kids were not there and I did not notice.

Before we even managed to get settled, an older woman (not old) but older than me (perhaps my mother's age) offered to guide me through the town in her car, and I accepted. So I separated from my husband.

I don't remember all of the tour, but it was lengthy, and I remember I got little out of it

Although at one point we stopped by the library, and a young male librarian somehow figured out I was Polish, and he spoke Polish too. He brought out lots of Polish sweets. I knew that while I could handle them, I could not eat any, even though I wanted to. I unwrapped some chocolates from their foil wrapper. I asked him where the closest Polish store was. He did not know even though he had all these candy, so he went to ask someone else, but he could not figure out the answer. I apologized for messing up (unwrapping) his chocolate candy. I tried to rewrap it, but the wrapper was no longer there. So I wrapped it in a green cloth napkin instead, and left it next to the books on a counter.

We continued the town tour in a car, but I was getting bored and tired. So I told the woman, and she seemed annoyed. I explained that we just got here into town, and I had not even had a chance to walk into my own new home yet. It became clear that even though she had picked me up close to where I lived, but she was unwilling to drop me off there. I could study the bus schedule. She had a bus schedule in the car, but I could not figure out how to read it, so I got out of the car and approached a bus stop to read anothe bus schedule there. That's when I realized that I did not know my address, nor which neighborhood we lived in or how far I was.

I took out my iPhone to try to contact my husband. An app was up, and I tried to close it, but I got an endless supply of Do you want to Exit? Prompts from this app, and hitting Exit just brought up a slightly different menu with Exit as one of the options.

I heard someone call my husband's name. I saw him approaching with a group of students. Only then I realized that it was just someone who had his name, and kind of looked like him (not really).

Somehow I made it home (either scene shift or new dream). My husband and I decided to hire a prostitute who was a friend of ours by the hour to help us unpack and improve our new home. The young woman was very excited by this assignment which was a refreshing change from her usual.

I remember a dream I had earlier tonight:

I was a teenaged boy (so definitely not myself). I had runaway from home, and had started being part of a bad crowd. The people I hung with appeared much older than me, and hardened criminals. I had a sense that they would not stop short of murder. I felt that I was I over my head, but a self proclaimed mentor tried to persuade me that I was where I belonged.

Interesting re-occurrence of self-proclaimed mentor idea

I believe I remembered the dream that I forgot earlier tonight, and I remembered the Significant Insight that I had reached before. This dream is actually about dreaming even though it may not appear to be!

In my dream I was an actress in theatre, just starting out. And an experienced actor had taken my under his wing and was showing me the ropes. During a break in rehearsal I had been chatting with another less experienced actor. My self-appointed mentor saw this, and afterward took me aside and reprimanded me, saying "Why are you wasting your time with that nobody? To succeed in this trade, It matters who your connections are. It matters who you are seen with, and he is not someone you want to be seen with." I rebutted him with "I am not in this for the usual reasons: I am not in it for the money nor for the fame, and I choose who I hang with."

While analyzing this dream after it happened it occurred to me that this dream was about why I am putting this effort into dreaming now, why I want to lucid dream, why I am here at DV:

I am not doing it for the usual reasons. Or maybe these are the usual reasons for some people, who knows. An important motivator for me is to regain my self-dignity and self-respect, to regain control of my dreams so that I do not do what my subconscious tells me to do. I get to choose who I hang with. For me the an important motivator for lucid dreaming this time around is moral reasons: I want to do what I perceive as being right (which of course does not mean I won't do something like shoot someone in a lucid dream because it feels right to do so , I need to do empowers me, and I need to not let those more experienced than me dictate what is right for me. This is what attracts me to DV is because it seems to be a place where people generally support this kind of attitude, and do not try to impose their way on others.

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Friday March 1 2013 I took NyQuil for my cold, and went to bed early. Around 8:30pm I woke up. I remember having some profound insight into my dream recall or something like that. I remember feeling very self-satisfied with my progress and how it was not just a fragment this time. After all this patting myself on the back, I almost fell back asleep without writing anything in my dream journal. I startled myself back awake in order to write it down, and it was all gone, except for this.