DarkestDarkness

4th October 2021

Scraps:

(a long dream, but poor recall)

Some RTS segment and I recall beaches and water.

One part a bit Minecraft-like or some other game. T is here and someone else is with me? Some kind of tower, or otherwise large structure.

One of the last parts of the dream, I am my alter-ego and there are interactions with me as such. The other people are dream-generated. They seem to be pressuring me, or something? Despite my form, I feel slightly shorter than others.

Some other dream? H has convinced mom and dad to bring S over here. I think H goes to pick them up and I remember seeing them all at one point. I feel concerned about S because of all the usual reasons regarding costs and also because of the long trip.

Notes:

- The last part was certainly a reflection of how I sometimes don't feel listened to or validated on, regarding both matters of money and of companionship. In the segment, some beliefs I hold as very important are partly betrayed by my closest, besides the fact I feel it may be detrimental to both S's health and to my financial situation.

- That same segment probably also relates to how I have often been very easily upset by changes to what a situation is and changes to what it would be or would have been.

- More recently it has been more frequent for me to take on my alternate form in my non-lucid dreams. In this case, the context likely relates to my art and some perception that the expectations of others are above my own. My stature is clearly metaphorical in regards to my feelings in terms of recognition, but this dream element also relates directly to some of my choice themes and how I've often felt physically inadequate in some specific areas (primarily to my own expectations) when compared to others.
-- I do not recall what exactly the other people were pressuring me about, but in terms of my waking life contexts, art is the most directly relevant context here.