• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    DarkestDarkness

    I am keeping this dream journal out of the interest of making my dream recall improve again, as I have gone for a quite some time without making a journal at all.



    I am writing the dreams almost as I would if I were writing on paper only to myself. The only exception is that in this DJ I will not be naming people by their names unless it's relevant to the dream context, since I want the dreams to be understood/readable by anyone; even if you don't know who my friends are or people I know by name, I still want you to understand the immediate contexts as much as possible.

    I will keep a list of my dream signs in a separate area when I get around to it.

    Comments on the DJ are welcome. See my dream signs in the general notes under my profile avatar.

    Click to see all DJ entries with images that I made for them.

    Will edit this with more later.

    1. lv.

      by , Today at 10:49 AM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up at about 8:30 but didn't remember any dreams, fell asleep and woke up again at 10:15, initially remembering a couple of dreams that started to fragment before I got up to write on the DJ.



      Dream:
      I was at a computer and looking at a website; it had a plain black background and it was some sort of shop, selling plushies. There was a dropdown box and there were about 5 options. I had a dream memory or dream bit where I bought something like a crate of 200 ram plushies from some other website at a much lower price, for about 50 in total. On this website, each plushie cost anything between 16.99 and 38.99 or so.

      I remember buying a goat plushie and when I clicked on the plushie titles from the dropdown box an image changed to show a rotating photo of them as a preview. Then I saw there was a little wolf, called something like "bloodthirsty wolf" or something, and it was really cute and had really large bloodied fangs and had an open maw. The size of the mouth and head looked exaggerated on purpose. Most of the plushies looked to be exceedingly well detailed, despite not being much bigger in size than my closed fist; they were in a cartoony style. I really wanted to buy the wolf plushie too and I think I did, but I started to wonder if I should be spending so much money on plushies. Remember thinking to look at my bank balance, but for some reason my phone wasn't near me and I ended up not checking.

      It seems I've forgotten the other dreams as I wrote this one, hopefully remember them or fragments while doing something else...



      Some notes:
      • While I really do like collecting animal plushes, I haven't bought any in some time now.
      • I also wouldn't, in principle, be looking to buy them online. I like to know the quality of the material as I buy them, as when I was a child I always had a somewhat irrational fear that plushes I had would tear apart etc if you weren't very careful. I still feel like I have to be very careful with some, as I don't like the idea of damaging them.
      • There's a big connection to my childhood from plushes in general, as my room had a lot of them by the time I was a teen. Friends often made fun of it if they were visiting and my oldest sibling would sometimes mess around with them which would really upset me and almost make me cry sometimes, though he actually didn't mean it with any ill intent. I just saw things as being very fragile, while he never did.
      • A pair of plushies I last bought were two fluffy sheep. The ones available on the dream website seemed to be sheep, rams, goats and wolves.
      • I'm not sure what brought on this dream context as a whole, as I see my and my partner's plushies around the house often, every day.
      • Edit: discussed the dream briefly with my partner and he reminded me that recently we'd been working with goat and sheep leather, and that was probably what elated this dream context. I found myself immediately thinking about the leather as he mentioned this, and thinking how the fluffy side would be interesting as a material on plushes.




      Scoring thus far:
      + Previous score: 51.0

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 1.0
      ++ Recall a non-lucid dream: 1.0

      = Total score thus far: 52.0

      Updated Today at 11:23 AM by 95293

      Categories
      side notes , non-lucid
    2. liv.

      by , 10-18-2018 at 10:22 AM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up at 8:30 and then again around 9:10 and had some long non-lucids, but forgot most of the details. Really tired too so not particularly motivated.


      Fragment:
      Something about Dark Souls (3), I remember the feeling of keypresses for attacking but remember being "in" the game.

      Remember some other scene where I interacted with dream characters.


      Scoring thus far:
      + Previous score: 50.5

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 0.5
      ++ Recall a non-lucid fragment: 0.5

      = Total score thus far: 51.0
    3. liii.

      by , 10-17-2018 at 12:35 AM
      Non-dream stuff - woke up between 8 and 9:00. Some non-lucid dreams but only made note of a final part of one in the morning.



      Dream fragment:

      Was at some sort of compound, it was mostly a ground-level structure/building. The day was cloudy, shadows were diffuse.

      The ending of the dream was in a huge parking lot, like ones at some airports I suppose. My dad was driving a van like the dad of my partner (H) has. Dad drove up near me and I think I was talking to him or my mom on the phone as he got close. I saw H walking, at the opposite end of the parking lot. I got in the van and asked dad to pick H up. I think I got in the back of the van and it was crammed with boxes and stuff, making it a bit dark in the back. I remember being able to see the cabin from there.

      H spotted us and started coming our way. Dad drove toward two parked cars with a space between them (with the intent of parking there?). H was walking into that space and dad advanced with the van but H fooled around making funny faces and walking backwards as dad approached.



      Some notes:
      • My partner's behaviour was the sort of goofy thing he does sometimes.
      • My dad doesn't (and never has?) have a van.
      • I think my mom was in the van too, sitting next to my dad in the front. But I don't remember clearly.
      • It probably would have been a good idea to question the reality of things solely based on the fact I got in the back of the van like that, as it was unsafe, really. But added to that, although my parents have visited us (ish, we went to them, they visited the country) fairly recently, it is not likely they would come over again so soon.





      Scoring thus far:
      + Previous score: 50.0

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 0.5
      ++ Recall a non-lucid fragment: 0.5(maybe there's something else to score but I'm so tired at the moment, I'm happy with this)

      = Total score thus far: 50.5
    4. lii.

      by , 10-14-2018 at 09:54 AM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up at around 8, not recalling any dreams apart from a very vague visual fragment, lost it and decided to sleep more, waking up again around 9 recalling a single long-ish non-lucid.



      Dream:
      Me and my partner (H) arrived by car at some pizza restaurant; I remember H backed up to park near the building, but he was parking towards some plastic tables and chairs. He was aware of them and stopped a couple of inches away from them. There was a small bump noise and when I got out there was a waitress from the restaurant asking "is everything ok?" and I looked closely at the chairs/bumper and said to her it was all fine, and she accepted it.

      It was night time... H was going to sit outside (unlikely) and I was going to order the pizzas, in the dream it was implied we usually did it the other way around; I walked through the entrance doorway, which had no door as I remember. It was a dimly lit restaurant (probably contextual residue that far too many bloody restaurants are now, I'd like to see what I'm eating) and I walked towards the counter to make our order.

      There was a guy at the counter and a waitress on my side and she said she'd take my order; she looked happy and not just for the job, she just seemed happy. I said I wanted two pizzas, one would be the bacon and cheese melt or something (for my partner) and she said "oh I'm sorry but that will be double because of (?)"; she then showed me a menu trying to explain why, because in the dream memory this was implied to be new at the restaurant. She explained they were changing how some pricings worked and that all the outside was going to be reworked by AI over the next few days. We concluded the pizza I was ordering would still be the same price (9 something came into my head in the dream but no figures were spoken). She said OK and I said the next pizza would be with "some (?), cheese and some onion", thinking that I would like something salad-y with or on it. As if she knew exactly what I was thinking, she asked if I wanted some rocket lettuce or something but she said that I couldn't have any because they were out, so very oddly the choices instead of that were some sort of beetroots or cubes of lard... The stuff was all shown to me in the counter, which had become one of those with glass and the food in it (like at ice cream shops and sandwich bars).

      I said it was fine and thanked her and all the while we were talking she kept getting distracted by her co-workers. One of the other guys was some German guy that came from Berlin on a plane which caught fire mid-flight and landed here. They even had some pictures on a wall of the survivors? Whatever the photos were, they made me accept the story.

      Then I remembered to ask "oh, do I pay now or after?" and she said "uh, whichever". I said I'd pay now. But as I did, lots of people started entering the (previously) quiet restaurant. They sat at every possible table, as if on cue for something to happen. The waitress faced the counter and started talking to the guy over the counter I think.

      I waited, starting to be a little annoyed by the fact it had taken this long to do the order (it felt like a long time). I looked around and I can't remember what happened (something did) but all of a sudden everyone was singing roughly and half were clapping in a slow rhythm. I joined in the clapping and then shortly after, two people started chasing each other and the clapping stopped a moment after, but then they stopped chasing each other and sat back down.

      As all the clapping and clamour happened, more people were entering the restaurant, including H, who I could see clearly from a distance, head illuminated by a spotlight as he came in.

      At the same time, the waitress next to me dropped all her clothes. I was still waiting to pay, I initially glanced at her naked body but then just looked over the counter, wondering when I was going to be able to just pay for the order; I also automatically performed a reality check with my left hand after she got naked. But unfortunately I concluded the amount of fingers to be correct and I didn't remember to test the solidness of the reality. I felt like I was right in the centre of view (more than the naked girl) and felt awkward doing my RC there. Nobody in the restaurant was shocked (I wasn't either) but she started laughing and saying something to someone on a table near me; she was facing the counter the whole time, so most of the restaurant would only see her backside, as I was to her right, and to her left was a wall. Something about the "AI works" came up again at some point.

      I remember being outside again, and some sort of game-like thing happening (regarding organising of the outside layout with AI) but I can't remember in detail.

      The dream ended soon after. I think I still have the lingering feeling of being annoyed by not being able to simply pay.

      Fragment
      I remembered a small fragment while writing the long dream, something about H wanting to buy or take a car overseas. I remember a weird wooden house place with triangle glass windows and very strange layouts. It was day.


      Quite tired so I'll leave notes for now.



      Scoring thus far:
      + Previous score: 42.5

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 7.5
      ++ Recall a non-lucid fragment: 0.5
      ++ Recall a non-lucid dream: 1.0
      ++ Perform a reality check: 5.0
      ++ Buy/Purchase something: 1.0

      = Total score thus far: 50.0
    5. li.

      by , 10-13-2018 at 11:01 AM
      Non-dream stuff - woke up a bit before 9 but didn't recall any dreams. Woke up again around 10 recalling some non-lucid stuff.



      Fragment 1:
      I was playing the game Freelancer, it felt as though I was "in" it; I was in a system that doesn't exist in the game, though I've dreamed similar systems before. It was like the Omicron Alpha system and some of the Sigma systems.

      It was a high level area but for some reason I was in the starter ship, and all the NPC ships were showing up red (hostile); despite this, they weren't actually attacking, more like they disliked me rather than hated me (which wouldn't show up as red in the real game).

      I don't think there were any planets in this system and there was one star and I could see some asteroid belts in the distance. The "sky" had some blue nebulas and bright stars but was mostly dark.

      Dream 2:
      I remember being in a small and cramped kitchen, the ceiling was kind of low, especially for a kitchen. There was a fluorescent light that lit up the entire room. In the kitchen were myself, my partner (H) and our friend (M).

      Can't remember what we were initially talking about, but while we all talked I crouched next to the fridge and opened it to have a look inside; the fridge didn't seem to have a light inside, and as I opened the door I hit M with it by accident. I said sorry and he said it was ok. I hadn't realised he was standing just there, somehow. I couldn't find anything I wanted really but I can't actually remember what was inside the fridge.

      I got up and closed the door and saw the time on some red 7-segment display: 17:09. M mentioned he was going to go to bed in a few seconds, I showed some surprise and asked "shouldn't we be having dinner then?" and we apparently hadn't had lunch yet, as H said "well, make it be our lunch too then".

      I think M was considering whether to eat before bed or not, and I think I asked what time he was getting up at, which he said would be 7AM or something. I walked in the opposite direction from M, past H, who was sat on a chair, and on a counter there was a pile of stuff under a tea towel. I took it off and underneath were some ready-made food packs, like chicken with noodles and vegetables. I grabbed one that was open, implied to be leftovers, and grabbed a nearby fork and ate some of the chicken. It tasted a bit... bland. I was disappointed and the rest didn't look that appetising; in fact, the rest of the chicken in this pack looked a bit pink and like it had a few white spots. But I knew it was cooked properly because these packs come pre-cooked and when I tasted some, it didn't taste raw. I nearly questioned all of this but the dream ended.



      Some notes:
      • When I used to play Freelancer, going to higher end systems in a low-level ship wasn't too uncommon for me; the dream hostility implication being that most of the factions I'd want to ally with are ones that you start off as being hostile towards, and the other thing is that if I was starting a new game, because I was good at avoiding shots, there were good wreckage and freight piracy spots in some of these areas, giving a quick boost to being able to get to a higher-end ship sooner.
      • I mostly remember seeing Outcast and Lane Hacker factions in the dream. The appearance of Lane Hackers in the dream is strange because they are allies of the Outcasts but I almost never interacted with them.
      • In the second dream, M seemed a bit sad or upset and not really up to talking. This is probably residual from his current real-life situation.
      • The pink bits on the chicken looked odd because they were on the outside, where the chicken did look cooked; because of the small white spots, I think I probably would have concluded it to be some sort of bacterial or fungal growth, had the dream carried on. I should remember to do a RC when food tastes funny or bland in general.
      • Although I remember arriving at the kitchen from outside, I don't remember an outside or a previous dream.





      Scoring thus far:
      + Previous score: 34.0

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 8.5
      ++ Recall a non-lucid fragment: 0.5
      ++ Recall a non-lucid dream: 1.0
      ++ Recall any non-lucid dream over 7 consecutive nights: 7.0
      Though I could probably consider that "fly" happened in the first dream, I don't remember enough sensations to consider it valid.

      = Total score thus far: 42.5
    6. l.

      by , 10-12-2018 at 01:07 PM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up at around 9:20 recalling one or two non-lucid dreams, sat up to make note of one of them and forgot the other.



      Dream:
      I was in a town I don't recognise and it was night time. I was head to some place and then I ran into a stray dog, which looked like a mix between a dalmatian and a husky or something. But it was very scruffy and some fur was missing. Though I felt sorry for the dog I was initially wary that it may be aggressive or carrying fleas.

      It got very close to me, rubbing against my legs but I kept moving on and it kept following me. I was going into some sort of garden/park and there were small trees but they made enough shade even at night that it felt considerably darker now. There were pairs of wild cats or something and they did look aggressive.

      I was avoiding getting too close but the dog following me started growling and barking at them, I said "shh silly dog, stop that!"

      The cats didn't react very much, but I was afraid they would but the dog stopped provoking them and continued following me.

      Eventually at the other end of the park there was a brick wall, part of a building. In the wall there was a square doorway, literally a hole in the wall.

      Inside was a small dark room and there was a mini shower for the dog and some dog shampoos and things. I turned on the shower or it came on by itself and the dog became a person. At that point I thought the dog shampoo might not be such a good idea anymore since it wasn't meant to be used on people.

      Then there was some transition and it was implied I was on the other side of the building; it wasn't as dark now, it was starting to become day. There was a dirt path and a barn or something and a boy with a backpack.

      I was here like the boy to do some sort of exam, but I remember I had some pills, 4 or 5 of them and oddly enough I put all of them in my mouth at the same time, and struggled a bit but managed to swallow them. They were all different colours, as I remember holding them and looking; white, light blue, magenta and something else.

      Then I walked towards the barn and I remember walking up a couple of steps and entering. I think someone was there but my memory of the dream kind of ends here.



      Some notes:
      • The dog was smaller than I would expect for either of the two breeds it seemed to be.
      • The cats looked a bit like lynxes or bobcats or something, they were fairly big but not much bigger than the dog.
      • The bit with the pills was particularly odd; I never carry pills around, but of course there's some contextual residue that I take supplements before bed sometimes. The fact that I took so many at the same time was odd too because it can be difficult to swallow just one large pill without a drink, let alone a few more at the same time.
      • I remember the dog shampoo bottle looked a bit like a plant feed bottle; it was plastic, red body, green cap.




      Scoring thus far:
      + Previous score: 32.0

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 2.0
      ++ Recall a non-lucid dream: 1.0
      ++ Help someone in need: 1.0 (the dog, I felt like I was helping my letting it follow me, as I didn't know what would happen otherwise and would feel guilty otherwise)

      = Total score thus far: 34.0
    7. xlix.

      by , 10-11-2018 at 10:52 AM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up at 6:30 with the first dream, then at unknown time had the second dream (fragment) and then woke at 9:20 with third dream. Made note of all on phone initially.



      Dream 1:
      Mixed location of my home town with where I live now. Recycling was being collected and it was morning. I remember coming to pick up our bags back but they were only "half-empty", as were everyone else's. Other people were there, also disgruntled for that same reason. I found some vintage gear in the midst of this, but for some reason I felt like it was stuff of ours to begin with, so I wasn't sure how they'd got there. It was morning and cloudy.

      Some sort of transition, then in the car with my partner driving away from town; I said I didn't like the route we were taking, as it was transitioning from town to massive red canyon-type cliffs and we were going at super high speed on a ring of red rock suspended in the air (like something you'd see in 90s sci-fi racing games). It was a clear and bright day at this point.

      After the canyon, we were arriving at a megapolis and the sun was setting. We parked up on a hill away from it all and started walking down to a large concrete pillar. It had what looked like cash machines embedded into it, but they weren't cash machines; they were some sort of tourist information points, and the machine would teach us some local lingo. I spent some time on it reading the words and trying to pronounce them correctly. It reminded me of Pidgin and Jamaican. When I was at the machine, I made particular note that the person on the other machine looked like one of my aunts (G) but thought no further about it and assumed it a coincidence.

      Then there's an implied transition that we went up somehow. We were now in the lobby of a grand place; it was a casino, carpeted, wood paneling, etc. Before I got to the reception I remember this black girl; somehow she looked like a younger and female version of Morpheus from the Matrix, and also without sunglasses. Her mouth was distinctly like his, she could have been his daughter. I don't remember what we talked about, but at one point I started to feel like she was pestering me/following me and I and my partner (H) just moved on to the reception desk. H was talking to the receptionist and there was an implied topic of H's mom having recently passed away. I questioned this a little bit but some sort of dream memory made me assume it was true.

      Whether it was a memory of the dream or a real memory, I was certain I'd been at this casino before. We were being given far more points than last time, and I could see there was a wooden framed number counter with 6 digits behind the reception desk, on the wall. It was the money I had available? 22000 it said; so I went down to 20000, and got in exchange some 50000 points or something, including to spend on some sort of "casino skills" like it was a game.

      Then all of a sudden we were teleported into another part of the casino. I could see myself in third person and I was some character wearing a light blue outfit. H wasn't with me anymore, I was confused and the dream ended; I woke up just as confused, sweating profusely, feeling like H was missing, when H was actually just next to me in bed.

      Dream Fragment 2:
      I was in some sort of large mansion or house. I don't remember much about it apart from zombie-like people, except they weren't rotten/rotting. They were alive and well, apart from being mostly mindless. I had some sort of special powers that I could use with my hands. I vaguely remember a selection interface.

      I tried the powers on the zombies, and they would mostly have the effect of making them behave differently or responding to commands from me and the like. The last ones I tried were on a woman, none of the powers worked on her. She had a white cardigan top and had short brunette hair and brown eyes. She became aggressive when the powers didn't work and started trying to gouge my eyes out with her thumbs; my eyes were closed and I could feel the pressure but I grabbed her arms with my hands but somehow she gained an extra arm; at this point I started to question what was happening, but the dream ended soon after.

      I don't recall when in the night this dream occurred.

      Dream 3:
      Me and H were in our kitchen. It was night but instead of the kitchen having a rolling blind at the window, it had 2 curtains. Couldn't see very well outside at first. I was naked and started to become concerned about people looking in and seeing me naked, as the kitchen light was on.

      When I looked outside again, the outside looked bigger and smaller in some aspects vs waking life. It was bright now too, I could see lots of traffic on the climb behind our house, which was odd for this time of night. But there was a full moon with a violet glow; the glow reflected on clouds too and it was quite beautiful and interesting.

      I could see the top of a street lamp post and I looked away at something and back at it and it started to fall, albeit slowly. H became very concerned it would hit the work shed, but I could see clearly that it wouldn't and would land on an upper tier instead. The traffic was still heavy and I found it odd that nobody had stopped, even lorries just going through the road. Did they phase through or just smash the pole into bits? There was no noise of vehicles hitting it. It felt like a "physics bug".

      The dream ended soon after.



      Will edit in some notes later. Feeling a bit too tired.



      Scoring thus far:
      + Previous score: 12.5

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 19.5
      ++ Recall a non-lucid fragment: 0.5
      ++ Recall a non-lucid dream *2: 2.0
      ++ Buy/Purchase something: 1.0 (at the casino, buying points)
      ++
      Control another object or DC: 1.0 (in the dream fragment, controlling the "zombies")
      ++ How fast can you drive a car: 10.0 (in the first dream, when we went over the canyon, my partner's car simply shouldn't be able to go that fast and the suspended bit was curved, so if we weren't going that fast we would have fallen/steered off)
      ++ Recall any non-lucid dream over 5 consecutive nights: 5.0

      = Total score thus far: 32
    8. xlviii.

      by , 10-10-2018 at 10:20 AM
      Non-dream stuff. Woke up at about 9, only vaguely recalling a non-lucid dream fragment and a nl short dream.


      Fragment:
      I was playing some sort of strategy game, possibly a space strategy game, and I was in a lobby menu and my partner was going to play with me; then one of my siblings (T) joined the game lobby too. I remember discussing the game with T too.

      Dream Sequence:
      It was night time, I was in some sort of rural backroad and there was a little girl, blonde I think. Some snakes started coming out of the hedges and going toward the girl, but very very slowly. There was a car some 100/150ft away with headlights on; the dream implied it was mine, and I went to get inside the car to drive over to the little girl and grab her to take her in the car (why didn't I just do it in the reverse order?). The whole scene happened in third person view. I entered the car and drove up to the girl and got out again; the girl got confused because of the strong headlights on the car and squinted and covered her face and was confused; and I was about to grab her to get her into the car but dream ended.


      Some notes:
      • The game in the first dream fragment will again be a waking life echo of playing something like Homeworld again.
      • In the dream, I don't remember feeling threatened by the snakes, nor do I remember thinking they were a threat to myself; but they were clearly distressing for the girl.
      • Only when writing the journal entry now did I realise it was an odd order to go about things, when I could have just grabbed her before getting to the car, especially given how slow the snakes were.
      • For some reason, as I recalling the short dream, the snakes made me think of hares, and then the October competition. (Do snakes hunt hares/rabbits?)




      Scoring thus far:
      + Previous score: 10.0

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 2.5
      ++ Recall a non-lucid fragment: 0.5
      ++ Recall a non-lucid dream: 1.0
      ++ Help someone in need: 1.0

      = Total score thus far: 12.5
    9. xlvii.

      by , 10-09-2018 at 06:48 PM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up between 8 and 9, few details recalled of some non-lucid fragments, but some of those also lost due to writing this much later.



      Fragment 1
      Was in a spaceship of some kind, remembering traveling through a star system that had a gas giant planet that had a smaller planet lodged on its surface; I remember approaching the smaller planet and entering a blue sky atmosphere and I remember feeling both forces of ascent and descent, but always going very close to a horizontal parallel, so the forces weren't that strong.

      Fragment 2
      Some sort of transition with the first fragment where I was a giant and going through a city. Few details remembered now but I distinctly remember feeling like the perspective wasn't quite accurate (the field of view seemed too small).

      Fragment 3
      Doing something "naughty" with my partner, in a large concrete room; there was a bulb hanging from the ceiling, tungsten. There were a couple of computers that we weren't supposed to be using or something. The room had a door but it was more like a barred door, so it could be seen through. I remember feeling like somebody could intrude at any point.



      Some notes:
      • The first dream (fragment) has probably originated from recently playing Homeworld again a bit. Another game I used to play from the same era was Freelancer, which was another space game. Often, using a system editor in Freelancer meant you could do weird things like the two planets in this dream fragment.
      • Though normally I would consider the second fragment to be a possible dream goal (like for the October competition by KarlaB18), I do not consider it detailed enough to actually have achieved that goal. The fact that it occurred is a positive for me because I rarely dream of subjects I'm very interested in or want to have fun with.




      Scoring thus far:
      + Previous score: 3.5

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 6.5
      ++ Recall any non-lucid dream over 3 consecutive nights: 3.0
      ++ Recall a non-lucid fragment: 0.5 * 3 = 1.5
      ++ Fly (1st fragment): 1.0
      ++ Transform/Shapeshift (2nd fragment): 1.0

      = Total score thus far: 10.0
    10. xlvi.

      by , 10-08-2018 at 09:29 AM
      Non-dream stuff - A couple of non-lucid fragments. Had initially woken up at 8 with no dream recall and then slept with the weak intent of dreaming a bit and woke up at 9 with these.



      Fragment 1:
      I remember being in a house, it was well-decorated and it was my house. There was a window to the outside and there were cars passing by but they looked like they were from the 50s.

      There was a woman here and I was talking to her. We were discussing her situation, and the fact that she had no husband. In the dream context I was not in the role of my "self" but of a character, and my dream self had a wife who'd passed away years ago. I was telling this woman how she was "no less of a woman to the Republic for having no husband". In the dream context the Republic referred to the government, as if the Roman empire had lasted up to this point.

      I remember she was sat on a couch which was red, but I don't recall its shape; and I walked around the room as we discussed this issue. I don't remember what either of us were wearing.

      Fragment 2:
      I was walking in a forest. It was definitely Autumn/Fall; though the forest had a lot of canopy which covered from any light, even in a large clearing area I was walking through, there was sunlight and it was orange, as were all the leaves both on the trees and the ground. I distinctly remember the feeling of walking through the leaves with my feet, but do not recall what I was wearing.

      I got up to a little mound and there was a ramp that looked like a bridge that had never been built, there being a tiny bit of road but then a lot of large cobblestone flags scattered around. The stones were very round as those found in lakes and they were a brown-ish colour.

      I went over the mound and on the other side of the bridge thing and there was some sort of metal bin; it was square and again, brown and orange in colour. It was upside down and I tipped it up toward this ramp and I remember either hearing a voice or thinking about it and how it reminded me of a trap you'd set to catch small animals.

      Sure enough, shortly after as I got up to go back the way I came, I saw a rabbit, its fur creamy and brown; I thought it would escape but I got close to it and remarked to it about its cuteness and touched its head, surprised by the fact that the rabbit was allowing me to get that close. As I pet the rabbit it turned almost cartoony with a smile. When I was walking back the way I came, I saw a few more rabbits of the same likeness.

      Fragment 3:
      I remember being at a store, it felt like the store under my childhood home. I was buying 3 or 4 things, though I only remember one of them was a cream soda in a beer-type bottle. I was waiting at the till to pay but nobody was coming, and then two other customers were there waiting too, cramping out the space with little regard for personal space, especially with the shopping, since it's a tiny till.

      Someone came to take our payments but even though I was certain I was there first, she served this other guy first and then me.

      I don't remember the part about paying and etc. I do remember opening the cream soda bottle with my hand (i.e. without a bottle opener, which I'm not confident I'd possibly be able to do), the metal cap feeling soft and not at all sharp when I did it. I poured it into a large glass, like one I have in my kitchen in waking life, and then tasting it; it tasted like fizzy cream soda, but very very weakly so. In the dream I concluded I'd poured water in first, but I doubted this conclusion because I'd emptied the bottle, which would have filled the glass.

      Fragment 4:
      A very odd, short, fragment where I was flipping through a book on perspective and it showed foreshortening using a baby's hands and legs, the next page over being something about rainbow dash and a diagram of anatomical orifices.



      Notes:
      • The sudden appearance of and then noticing of more rabbits is directly related to my waking-life experience of observing animals; usually I won't spot any for a while, but once I spot the first one, spotting all the others becomes much easier and almost accidental.
      • When I woke up, the rabbit reminded me of the competition KarlaB18 is running, because it is the image the fast team has, though a different colour fur.
      • The room in the first fragment felt more like the lobby to a bigger part of the house, but it also felt like a living room, as it mostly had displays and a bust statue or two.
      • When I tasted the cream soda I genuinely felt disappointed by the fact it was so watery. I was strongly expecting a nice creamy flavour in the dream. Now I have a craving for cream soda...



      Scoring thus far:
      + Previous Score: 0.5
      + Recall a non-lucid fragment * 4 (@0.5ea): 2.0
      + Help someone in need: 1.0 (The woman in the first fragment)

      = Total score thus far: 3.5
    11. xlv.

      by , 10-07-2018 at 09:38 AM
      Non-dream stuff - Still catching up a bit on dream recall, woke up at about 7 and then again at 9, recalling a tiny fragment of a non-lucid.



      Fragment:
      I don't remember the location, and I can't visualise it very well, but there was a little girl; she wanted something, either from me or someone else. I needed a suit's pants for some reason, to be able to get into some place; for some reason I had decided in the dream that the pants and any top would be fine, even though to get into this place most people had a full suit.

      I vaguely remember a dock or a quay, maybe a large ship, but I don't remember water or open space.

      Can't remember enough visual details to put a coherent scene together and afraid that random memories are mixing together with any potential visuals.



      Notes; not directly related to the dream this time:
      • I spent a few days away and couldn't exercise my dream recall during those days because of my morning schedules.
      • My left leg's pain is being quite distracting, but not helped by the fact that before I came to write this DJ entry I had already been moving around the house a fair bit (getting more exposed to daylight and forgetting details).
      • When I woke up I was thinking about the October competition, and have been for the last couple of days. I have a printed bit of paper with my personal goals on my bedside table now.




      Scoring thus far:
      + Previous score: 0
      + Recall a non-lucid fragment: 0.5

      = Total score thus far: 0.5

      Updated 10-07-2018 at 09:42 AM by 95293

      Categories
      non-lucid , dream fragment , side notes
    12. xliv.

      by , 10-03-2018 at 09:49 AM
      Non-dream stuff - woke up at about 9:00, remembering one long(ish) non-lucid dream. Some details lost.



      Sequence:
      I remember being in a variation of my current home. I was in the kitchen. I remember a big man, he was a friend of ours; I think he was of some african ethnicity but he wasn't that dark - he had short hair and brown eyes and big hands; his girlfriend, who was of similar ethnicity was there too? She had long curly hair and brown eyes also. I think the kitchen lights may have been on, but it was day outside, maybe clear but very early.

      I remember they were talking and then it turned into an argument and I joined his girlfriend's side of the argument for some reason. Then I asked him to leave, and I realised I was a bit angry, so I immediately calmed myself down, touched him in the arm, as he was upset too, and I said "I'm sorry about that." - then everyone was a bit calmer and for some reason he had this bag full of chestnuts covered in sugar that had been deep-fried. They looked delicious but I commented that they looked nice, but unfortunately my mouth didn't agree because of all the sugar.

      I tried to make light of the situation somehow but either way, I then went through the main hall; the front door was open and as I walked out, the scenery was different from what it should be; our side of the street was still a row of terraced houses but the opposite side was just forest/green, and the road was wider (2 lane instead of single lane) and the pavement was much wider. My partner was parked up to the right in the car. To the left was some sort of factory (maybe tire factory, there is one where I live, but not that close).

      The factory was not open, as all its (visitor?) parking spaces outside were empty. I thought it had closed for the day, though the dream-time seemed like morning, my assumption was end of day time in the dream. Opposite to the factory parking spaces was a wide bit where a bus/coach could stop. Then the road did a curve as it went on.

      My partner was on the phone and had sunglasses on in the car. Opposite me, the other side of the road was some Korean man, he smiled a lot I think. Some children were playing too, I remember a little girl for some reason. I remember my mood outside was a driven one, I was looking for parking for the man inside the house, and I concluded there was none apart from the factory's spaces, so I walked back in and was going to tell him, but I had some doubts it was "ok" to use those spaces, but I think I could hear my partner's voice saying it was fine, because everyone had left. (another hint that the dream time was end of day, really)

      Transition of some kind or missing detail...

      I remember being with a group of people, my dad was one of the people but I don't remember who else, I think just dream characters. Of note was a man older than my dad. We were in a mall (this could have been a more obvious dream-sign on its own, plus the presence of my dad) and then we went up some concrete stairs and we were in an overhang tunnel, that went over some street or something. It wasn't very long but had angular corners. I walked next to my dad and as we were crossing, he pulled some sort of lever and the tunnel bridge started to rotate its middle section; I looked behind to see if the other DCs were able to get on.

      We walked to the other end and there was a stairwell down. Then I remember being outside of there and it was like some sort of campus... I looked around (I can't remember my motivations or intents) and ended up going down some more stairs into a dark place, a subway. The tracks were at the same level as the platform, i.e. there was no stone/concrete lip over the tracks. There were quite a few people at this tiny platform that was no bigger than a small room. The tunnels were equally dark, maybe brighter somehow. I think I had stepped on someone that was sitting down at some point, though I don't remember apologising, for some reason. I couldn't see them, still.

      Then I went down more stairs, to a similar sort of platform, also dark and small with several people waiting. I realised I was in the wrong place "that's the yellow line... I want the blue line" I thought, after seeing a yellow line along the tracks. I went up a level again and concluded that platform wasn't right either. I had the impression that each track was for the same line but went opposite directions.

      I got out to the surface again, this campus place, but everything looked... fake, almost plastic-like. I walked along the pavements between the grassy bits and there were people around. I reached a point that had one of those blocks you can hit from Super Mario. The dream started to look a bit Minecraft-y, with voids in certain spots on the ground, sky visible. I fell down by accident into a small void pit but fortunately there were some stone blocks there. I climbed up the opposite side and continued walking.

      Dream details are starting to go really fuzzy now, remaining memories of particular note only being one of a sword or something and of walking into a different place.



      Notes:
      • When I was thinking why I didn't want the chestnuts the reason was a valid waking-life reason, as I currently have some mouth ulcers that I really shouldn't "feed".
      • It is peculiar that chestnuts appeared, especially prepared in such an unusual way. I haven't had chestnuts in quite a while, but I haven't been thinking about them. It may be an automatic craving, as this is about the right time of the year, when we used to have chestnuts at my childhood home.
      • The Korean man was a waking-life remnant because a friend of ours was discussing the North Korean leader in passing conversation last night.
      • The subway, tracks, etc all were very obvious dream-signs that I missed as always. As I was thinking about that part when I was writing it, I was realising that when I've seen trains recently (mostly in games) I've never remembered to do a RC.
    13. xliii.

      by , 09-30-2018 at 11:55 AM
      Note: Technically, this wasn't a dream. Not entirely sure why I felt like putting on the DJ. Last night I was listening to the OST from STRAFE through some old headphones (80s I think) I have which make me almost unable to hear/feel the room if no music is playing, and I just had my eyes closed while listening.

      The soundtrack feels a bit "melancholic" to me in general, but others might not think of it that way. I wasn't trying to think of anything in particular and some imagery formed, though with little vividness, hardly any more vivid than regular imagination. Forgot some of the details, since this was last night before going to sleep.

      I couldn't recall any actual dreams today, my focus on waking up wasn't in the right place and ironically I'd forgotten about intents last night.




      As I was listening to second half of the OST, I had thoughts come and go of "darkness". Not vivid but dream-like imagery of being pulled down by my "dream" arm into pits - swarms of spiders and insects would appear and I wondered why it was that I could never have visualised a scene like this without feeling fear or horror in the past. Though the imagery wasn't strong, I still felt some disgust at some of the insects, particularly big ones.

      This repeated itself in different ways a few times mixed with other passing thoughts I can't remember, related to the imagery. I remember thinking that this probably wasn't what I was "looking for" and thinking that it was interesting that a dream-like setting had formed.

      Then as the soundtrack got into the last quarter the thoughts went sort of into the actual in-game area that the track would play in, though the imagery was still relatively weak vs an actual dream, I could sort of feel a dream-body and started remembering the black lizard from another of my DJ entries.
      I started wanting to spot him but instead I realised that I was that lizard this time, seeing from first-person, but wearing a labcoat (which is one of my artificial dream-signs) and though I couldn't visualise clearly, I tried to do hand/finger reality checks; counting wasn't possible due to the low duration of physical memory and lack of "vision" - but passing my clawed fingers through my other hand's palm worked.

      Though I was fully aware of the music being outside this and the fact that I was sitting on a chair, I felt it was important to try and do a RC to see if my mind would agree with what I was wanting to do. The place the "dream" body was in, was indeed dream-like, despite being awake.

      As the music progressed I remember running through the halls of Athena (the in-game area) as if it were in the actual game, getting "deeper" into the area, "looking" down at my "dream" legs, noticing that they were scaly and black and that the feet were dinosaur-like, with 3 front claws and 1 rear claw or something like that; the in-game enemies were appearing and I attacked them with the claws I had and my large reptilian mouth, eating some of the smaller enemies and making particular note of all the blood that was showering from the enemies, just like it would in the game. I wondered, was this the darkness I was looking for? I concluded it wasn't. I tried to taste the blood but the sense wasn't strong enough since I could still feel my actual mouth too. I tried using the channeling effect from Warframe with my attacks but while this did disintegrate the enemies into energy, more seemed to appear from the dispersed energy.

      As the music got to the last track I had on the list, which is the music for the final room in Athena, I realised I was standing where the boss would be. There was the player character down below in the chamber; he was autonomous and attacked the boss control room tower and shot towards me too, not penetrating the glass with the bullets. For some reason I taunted him by licking the glass, noticing the tongue to not be reptilian-like but being long, with somewhat better visuals than before. Then I remember breaking the glass and crawling down the wall as a lizard would and going for the player character and killing him; the hordes of enemies that were attacking him turned to me instead and I remember fighting them and soon after the music ended and the imagery ended, as if I'd" woken" up, despite having been "awake" the whole time.

      Edit: Forgot to remove private entry checkbox, so changed that. (I sometimes check it so I don't post by accident when I'm sleepy and everything is half-typed ).

      Updated 10-02-2018 at 12:01 AM by 95293

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , memorable
    14. xlii.

      by , 09-26-2018 at 11:57 AM
      Non-dream stuff - had a couple of non-lucid dreams I remember in some detail. Chronological order slightly forgotten.



      Dream fragment:
      I was playing some sort of space game, I could see in third-person view the ship I was controlling. Though I distinctly remember being "in" the game, I know my partner was watching me play, and I was in a system that had 3 jump gates to other stars; the jumpgates looked a bit Stargate-like, but two were coloured red and one was green. I wanted to go in one of the red ones. The system was very dark, there was a red giant star at its centre and when I arrived at the gates (that for some reason were clustered together) there were 2 ships, which were part of local military.

      I remember using the jumpgate, though I don't remember the transition special effects, and when I got to the next system, it felt like it was a bit more dangerous. Visually it was confusing, I was struggling with the controls all of a sudden and the field of view adjustment kept changing for no reason. There was a blue giant star, and a regular yellow star; I remember some nebulae, blue, too, but there was something odd about the "skybox"* for the system.

      In my controls struggle I accidentally started warping, backwards, somehow. The warp got faster and faster and I could see a "ul" units measurement at the bottom of the interface, going up quickly from 0.x to ~700. I managed to stop it and was now in a different system. I remember commenting to myself "oh, I forgot that worked that way", regarding the system travelling feature of the warp. It reminds me now of the warp mechanic in Eliteangerous.

      Then I used it again and went forwards this time but steering at the same time, but when I warped out, I was in a planet with my ship, in the middle of a mega city, so I had to quickly try and maneuver up through openings I could see.

      I remember getting past the atmosphere though I don't remember what happened next.

      Dream sequence:
      On a plane, with my partner. I don't think I was too happy about it; but we were landing, and we were landing in a street somewhere in France. This was the planned destination and the landing worked and stopped more than few hundred feet away from the nearest building.

      We got out and I think we went to a flat somewhere, I think it was my aunt's and I remember some sort of interaction with my aunt before the dream started. But all I remember from the flat was that it was like our real kitchen and there was a bathroom. The bathroom was filthy, there was trimmed hair everywhere; there was a slight yellow tinge on things, not from urine or anything, as far as I can gather. There were no strong smells. But it felt filthy. I was trying to clean the toilet's rim with some paper, for some reason, and it was taking very long.

      There was a transition and the next thing I remember is being at a supermarket in the same city, and I'm picking up what looks like a sweetener capsule dispenser thing, but instead, they have pictures of great monuments on them. I pick one that has a Great Pyramid, and I remember thinking or commenting to someone near me, "with this we can build our own pyramid... seems it takes about 3.8 acres of land, so we just need to get some 4 acres of land somewhere".

      I walk to one of those self-checkout things, only carrying this little thing, and I scan it but I'm a little confused as to how things work and take a little while to understand where to place it; then I do, and I'm about to pay, but this other French guy about my age or younger starts using the same machine as I'm using, and I speak to him in English saying "excuse me, could you help me pay?" and he doesn't even look at me, which I feel to be rude. In the dream I have the distinct feeling they ignored English on purpose. I somehow manage to pay with my card, which I took out of my wallet blindly, but confirmed to be the card I wanted by the 4 last numbers, which were accurate to waking life as I remember.

      I leave the shop and go down some street. Of note, I go past a man painting some sort of tall vertical canvases, in his own shop, but do not talk or engage with him. Down this street I am looking for a suitable land for this pyramid I want to build. I find some plaza and some ruins, and in the dream I think that because there are some Aztec-looking ruins I could just use them as a base for the pyramid... It's a micro steppe pyramid in its own right, this ruin, and I remember a hole that would be the stairwell. It is exceedingly dark in here, but I can see somehow. There is a different hole next to a wall, big enough for any grown man to slide in, but I do not satisfy my curiosity and walk away instead. Something felt odd but that wall opening, like it would go down forever.

      I remember going up some street and then seeing some big building with a hand-painted sign that said:
      "2 any artist;
      60(something) (something);
      214 accomplished artist"
      or something to this effect. I got annoyed reading the sign. The numbers were value/money, and I felt that it was unfair to unknown artists. I commented something out aloud and realise that I'm standing next to the shop with that man from before, with the tall cyllinders that he painted. He said to me "unfortunately that's how it works; you can see how much work I have here - because it is exotic and unusual, I am not considered to be good or accomplished" or something like this. His shop was literally cluttered with all of his artistic work, some of it looked quite nice, some of it was indeed a bit unusual.

      There was another dream after this but I've forgotten most of the details, apart from a teen boy being naked and antagonising me, who I punched in the face, though he didn't back down and just kept being annoying. There was a little girl but she seemed sad, she had a little pink dress.



      Notes:
      • *The skybox is traditionally a scaled up 3D element that keeps the exact same position as the player and makes up the far-distance objects that can be represented either with 2D sprites or low resolution 3D models.
      • The comments of the other artist reflect partly the basic feel I have about art's value in general.
      • My partner was present at some points in the second dream but I don't remember the interactions between us.
      • I have been to France only once, when I was a kid, and had the possibility of going again when I was around 16, but didn't.
      • In the dream I just couldn't understand why at the supermarket the guy was rude to me. I was being polite and asking for help to get out of his way. But it later occurred to me in the dream that if I'd used my native language instead he wouldn't have been so rude, so it felt like it was a French/English animosity thing.
      • I don't know where the 3.8 acres figure came from (it seems very specific but for no reason) in the dream for the Great Pyramid's base area; but checking quickly has revealed to me that the Pyramid's base is about 13 acres, about 3.25 times my 4 acres land estimate in the dream. I do not have any intuitive understanding of the actual area taken by an acre in waking life, so if there was any accuracy at all, it would have been a surprise.
    15. xli.

      by , 09-25-2018 at 12:13 PM
      Non-dream stuff - Had a few non-lucids, mostly only remember the details for one sequence, since I didn't come to write on the journal straight away.



      Fragment:
      I was in a game and I fought two girls that were teamed up, over a wooden planks bridge or something like that; the landscape was pretty blocky in general as I remember it, and these girls had picked/were characters that were really strong together, due to the way their abilities synergised with each other. I mostly struggled to deal significant damage to them, as they recovered or blocked it and eventually I remember falling in a low pit and getting cornered and killed. I don't remember what kind of abilities or weapons I was using.

      Dream:
      I was in the same game, and with this dream I remember the format more clearly: it was a player-versus-player online game. It was night but very clear as there was a bright moon light, and many of us, the players, were on a rocky slope upward toward a castle. The castle had a gate, and it was going to open when the game began.

      This time I had a power armour (Enclave-type) like from the Fallout series, and I remember I "pressed" esc and was looking at the armour's details on a menu. The menu was very plain, and was mostly just drop-down menus. The dominant colour was a cyan-ish blue, not unlike a fluoroscan.

      I remember my eldest sibling being out of scene in the dream but commenting about the game and asking me what it was like. At this point, I do remember seeing the "screen" as I was pointing at something, but other than that, the entirety of the dream takes place "inside" the game. I replied something in conversation while still looking at the armour details, when I found some sliders and options I could adjust for abilities.

      I noticed there was a little face icon with a number in front of it, 4300, my interpretation of which was that this was how many points I had left to spend (and some abilities took 100,1000,2000, etc). I noticed a regeneration ability that I really wanted to pick (tends to be a personal favourite in games) but then when I was looking for it again, I couldn't find it. I tweaked some other settings I don't recall, such as my max health ability but then the match was starting while I was still looking at the menu, and very quickly, someone else killed me.

      Later I respawned or something, somewhere in the map, and I was trying to be sneaky through some dark areas, which remind me now of the Kuva Fortress in Warframe, and ended up running into a few different people; they didn't attack me immediately so I didn't attack them either, and one of them also had a power armour and she (a pretty faced black woman, I saw, as she didn't have the power helmet on) was asking me how I'd managed to configure certain abilities for the armour. She commented on the fact that I was killed at the start while looking at the menu and that whoever had done it was distasteful for doing so. I appreciated her comment.

      I remember giving her some advice on the armour abilities, though I don't remember the details. She and a few others, a mix of young (teens?) boys and girls, were at the top landing of a small staircase, to which I walked up to as well; there was a doorway to the right, though I have a vague memory of what was through it; I can't remember it other than being a room with wooden floorboards.



      • There was some other dream fragment I initially remembered, but ended up forgetting while remembering the big dream sequence.
      • The two girls that killed me in the game in the first fragment had a cheeky playful attitude and sort of taunted me as they fought.
      • The castle doesn't remind me of any particular place, but it had an Unreal Tournament feel to it.
      • The transition from being inside the game, to being outside but playing and then back into being inside again was something rare, as that's not really happened before very much.
      • The death while in the menu felt a bit too sudden/random; I don't remember hearing a projectile or a weapon firing, but it seemed like I got hit by a one-hit-kill explosion. And I thought the starting area would be safe until left.
      • The black woman in power armour seemed to have some sort of strong motivation for being there that wasn't directly related to the game itself, she just had a sort of serious look on her face like she was looking for something in particular.
      • I'm making note that while maybe it's not directly related, she was black and had a very meaningful interaction via conversation with me in the dream, and recently in my last DJ entry I've had a lot of black (but the actual colour) dream signs. Oddly enough, it is of some contrast to the last entry that the bit where we stood and talked was brightly lit by a single light from above, and I think the walls were a bright yellow, but it was otherwise dark. But generally speaking, this dream was not even half as dark as the one in my last entry anyway.
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