spellbee2

So it’s been a long time since I’ve typed up any of my dreams on here. And it’s 2016 now, which I guess means it’s resolution time as well. So in addition to striving for 100 lucids this year (which I managed to accomplish last year ), I’m also going to strive to type out every single one of my 100 lucids. And since I had two good ones last night, there’s no better time to start than right now.

I’m in an episode of the Office, where I’ve just been hired by Dunder-Mifflin. There’s a conflict over where my new desk should go, since it’s currently stashed away in the corner with the rest of the storage supplies. While everyone else is arguing, I walk over and search the storage area and find a neat flute/ocarina thing. It’s even kinda Legend of Zelda themed, with the sound holes on it shaped like the Triforce. However, instead of being rounded in shape, it’s more straight, like a very wide recorder or flute. I’m told it’s a beat-box ocarina, specifically made so you can beatbox while playing it. I try it out, and the song I make sounds pretty cool, but because of the weird shape of the mouth piece, I pretty much flood it with spit.

I wake up here, much before my actual WBTB alarm is set to go off. I go back to sleep, but I don’t recall any dreams before my alarm goes off. I get up for a bit, and then try to go back to sleep, which, much to my dismay, takes quite some time.

Fortunately, the WBTB works and I transition straight into a dream. I’m standing in the backyard of my old childhood house. I stabilize, and am suddenly amazed at how vivid everything is. I try to think of what to do, and for some reason I decide to just try to fly up as quickly as I can. I squat down a bit, and then launch myself up at a pretty impressive speed… straight into a cloud. I can’t see anything above or below me, it’s just a huge fog, so the dream quickly destabilizes.

I’m not sure if I really woke up or just had a FA, but I transitioned into a new non-lucid dream. I’m now in this weird game about alien abduction. I have to keep these cats in the bottom of this Egyptian pyramid from being abducted by these small UFOs that were coming to take them (if you’ve ever played the UFO mission in Majora’s Mask, it’s kinda like that). It’s difficult, but on my third try I manage to pull it off. I then spend some time playing with the remaining cats in this strange little area in the basement.

I wake up again, write down this dream, and then transition back into another dream. I’m now in my old childhood bedroom, which is now set up like my current dorm room. My two roommates and I are all in bed, and one of my roommate’s friends is lying in a sleeping bag on the floor. The roommate and the friend have some kind of argument and the friend storms out. I realize this is weird, but I’m still only kind of half-lucid. I go to get out of bed, only to feel some weird crawling on my arms and back. I turn the light on to find these creepy bugs all over my bed. They’re each about the size of a penny, and they’re shaped kinda like stinkbugs, but with all different colors. I try swatting them off of me, but they keep flying back on me, trying to burrow into my pants. I run over to the computer and do a quick search to find out how to get rid of them. I’m too preoccupied to type, so I just voice search it.

“Hey Siri, search for ‘small, colored bugs that swarm your bed and itch like crazy!’”
Soon after I get a response. “The African Dung Beetle. Prefers dark places, like your buttcrack.”

I soon remember that this is just a dream, so I quickly stabilize, which makes the bugs disappear, or at least not itch anymore. I try to think of a better thing to do than flying like last time, so I decide on some TOTMs. I start with the easiest - find a book and read its title. I walk over to the bookshelf, where all my toys were stored as a kid. I finally find a book and pull it out. It’s a fairly big book, about 300 pages, and on the cover in purple text is the title:

Ensuring Your Wedding Cake is Adequately Sized and Appropriately Proportioned for Maximum Portability
(Because He's Going to be Taking It Home With Him)

I find this incredibly hilarious, so I lose control of the dream, and it transitions to a new scene. I’m now on this weird island, heading to go crash some kind of wedding. I remember that I’m dreaming, so I try to think of the next task to complete. I decide to summon Sensei, both to fulfill the TOTM and to get some help with dream control. I tell myself he’s somewhere at this wedding reception. My vision zeroes in on this one tall, stocky blonde guy (which I know for a fact isn’t what Sensei looks like IRL, but whatever), so I walk over to him.

“Hey Sensei.”
He laughs. “No one’s called me that out loud in a long time.”
“So I still need help with firebending. I just can’t get it down consistently.”
“Well, show me how you’ve done it.”

I do my normal motion, which is kind of a forward thrust of my wrist, like Spiderman launching a web. Much like usual, nothing happens, even after two or three tries. “Ah, I think I see your problem. It's not so much a thrusting motion as it is a throwing one… Have you ever tried throwing playing cards?”

He hands me a deck of cards, and sets up a few bottles on a table near us. He then shouts “Go!”, and starts throwing the cards like ninja stars at the bottles. Not to be left behind, I start throwing them as well. After a few throws, I get the hang of it and quickly pick up speed. I exhaust the deck and slam the empty box on the table. Sensei smiles and tosses his last few cards at me. “Now try it.”

I back up a few steps and try the card-throwing motion, and manage to successfully create a large fireball. “Better,” he says. He then snaps his fingers, and the cards that are scattered all over the table and the floor start floating and go back into their boxes, kinda like the dishes in that one scene of The Sorcerer's Apprentice.

“Man, how do you get that good at dream control?”
“Lots of practice.”

I reach over and take a slice of cake from the table next to me, and I'm about to stick it in my mouth, but I wake up.