StephL

I did a short WBTB and only shortly tried for WILD - and became lucid in the middle of a dream in one of my classical settings. Not wanting to destabilize with wanting too much - I simply decided to go with the story, but in between I did weird things.
Like fly in the house and tell them they would be my dream.
So it went a bit back and forth with me loosing myself in the story and getting lucidity back - like it was always under the surface, when I interacted with people, but esp. when I ended up thinking I have to pack and unpack bags - I realized it again fully.

Dream:

I met my first love and there were two other women.
One of them I remembered - the other one a friend of his, too.
And we started recollecting, how we supposedly would have met.
Namely at a club, where the two of them were "bouncerines" - one with a bear-costume for some weird reason. And then we lived through this wrong memory - quite like it was for real, in the end, just complete different outer context.
Weird.

Fragment:

Digging around with my grandmother in that stone circle again, where her secret lab was under - nothing more.

The biggest problem in this comp was my recall.

Really very, very bad recall - I slept in my husband's room by mistake and that shook it all up.
Last thing, I dreamt, was a fragment, where I was playing a game with him, where certain pieces of furniture were used as figures - not directly chess, but something with furniture warfare, and we had a lot of fun playing it - the furniture wasn't completely inert, it moved and acted a bit on it's own.
Was nice, actually.

I had an external problem yesterday night - happy I got as much actually:


#1) I'm at a very elegant ball, dancing with my husband, both happy - I could do with more of that sort of dream!!

#2) I dreamt of a big aquarium full of plankton - but they were visible to the eye - e.g. diatoms with 5 cm radius and soo beautiful!
It's just a snippet, though - wish I knew, that it was about - what I did with these in the dream!!
That's the inspiration source - watched it yesterday - but I didn't do that on purpose to incubate:



#3) I moved in with some people from real life to share a flat, and somebody moves into a flat on the story under us, whom I know as well, but want to avoid him and don't want my mates to know.

#3) Having lost the way in winter, freezing, searching for a street to get to the house of a friend.

#1) A friends cuddly toy dragon came to life and flew about in my room. Which was greeted by us as him having finally recovered from being packed and squished in a removals box.
He really was squished and came out looking unhappy irl - don't know, how they do that sometimes - he looks almost completely happy again now - after sitting on my husband's cuddly moose's head for some days.
A red one - my mate is from Wales.
That was nice - probably why it survived my horrendous recall.

#2) Repairing the base under a rain-drainage pipe of the old house (gaaah) with my grandma - it was just a circle of stones irl, but in the dream it was the camouflaged entrance to a cave, where she had some strange laboratory - and the stones had been falling through to her secret facility.

Such a shame - these are rather interesting fragments - I wish I had the whole dreams - instead of remembering the frustrating ones, with school, uni and searching/packing things..

WBTB at 4 h after bedtime.

Lucidity comes about at the end of the religious lesson dream - when we leave the school building, I suddenly realize, that I got nothing to do with school any more for a long time.

So - I do my nose plug - yepp lucid - and remembering to do a proper senses stabilization as the main and first of all goals. So I look at a tree very intensely - at the bark.
And it does indeed get clearer and clearer - and fills my whole field of vision.
When I try to look somewhere else, though - there is nothing whatsoever left of my dream - and I wake up.
Should have moved, involved touch and not only looked at one thing - now I know..

Been complaining in the comp thread already - it's great on the one hand, how often I can get there lately - but once there - a lot is open to be wished for.
As said - I want adventure and it should look realistic and take long!
And I want my aliens!!

Just for my own motivation - I love the book "The Algebraist" by Ian M. Banks - there is a gas planet named Nasqueron with "dwellers" - and I so want to meet them and ask what they dream for the special task. Here is one of them:



It's supposed to be the height of say eight humans - and I'm visualizing them daily!
Maybe doesn't look as if you want to meet one - but they are fabulous - I want them in light grey by the way - I even drew one.


Okay - the dreams:

#1) Back in school and in a religion lesson - opted out of these irl - it's absolutely horrible - we get read texts, which make no sense - are even offensive and accusing all sorts of lifestyles of depravity.
But the teacher does have no natural authority - so I start behaving really badly - mock her - shout nasty comments, change places to talk to different people - one of my gay mates from university is there, too. And we start throwing things at her and chanting.
Pretty unusual - normally something doesn't work, or I fear something..
Yeah - but she gets the better of me by proclaiming, if I go on with it - I fail the class - and such my final secondary school exams.

#2) Been a while, I remember one of these - again I need shelter and go to my ex-boyfriend's parents house. It's in the middle of the night - but I'm lucky - no parents at home.
But his little brother - we chat a bit - he tells me Mr.X can't be disturbed, because he is soldering a very important circuit board. There is a violin in the shelf - and I think wow - lets see, if I can still play.
And I could - I played a while - but then - the part on the body, where the strings are originating loosened itself. It was clear, that it was not really damaged, but had to be put together properly again.
I tried to hide it from the brother - and managed miraculously - and fiddled about with the thing in non-literal sense this time. I managed - but didn't really trust it to be played or even touched roughly.
And went in to my X, forgetting about the importance - but he kept on soldering and talking to me at the same time. And told me something interesting - not for public consumption - but seems my uncon had something to say there.

#3) Again one of these - I got to really take note, when there is confusion as to where I stand in my institutional education - earlier it was school - now it was about where in university.
It's a bit boring to describe - I went into lectures and noticed, I had the certificates for them already - but always after almost despairing, how I should manage to take on that stuff they presented.
My gay friend was with me again - in a way it was like the second half of the first dream, just interrupted by the LD. I remember many details about it - like being in the cafeteria and they haven't got any strawberry cake left - despite everybody eating one on the tables.
And in the end, I met an other old mate from uni - and she told me, that I had long finished and my endeavours were completely useless.
Should have gotten lucid again from that - but didn't.

Fragment:
I was in a flat with a friend, and she was worried about two kids, if they would be in good care.
Which was sort of understandable, when the sitter appeared - she was enormously obese and wore a glaring pink mini-dress, made from such a flouncy fabric like some swimsuits are.
Her behaviour was not as mad as her outfit, though.

Did a WBTB after 4h and 3 mg Melatonin (empty now).
My recall is pretty patchy.

The lucid:

I find it almost embarrassing how much a 40 year old woman dreams of school and such stuff - but there you are. I was on an excursion with class-mates, got off track, and noticed something "in the air" - happened before, that there was nothing specific to detect.
Did my nose-plug - my by far favourite RC - and started out again by mental stabilisation, if one can call it that, because while thinking through, what I wanted to think through, and again doing some maths - I lost visual clarity - and didn't get it on properly for the whole rest of the anyway short LD.
It was a bit like groping about in the fog - but it was not fog, more like my eyes didn't work properly.
Maybe I should have tried to get that in order, but I feared to loose it altogether, before being able to do anything - so I took off flying.
That made it better a bit while in the air - but it wasn't really fun - more like an ordeal to get something done. When I was down - the visual problems were worse again.
I didn't find somebody to interact with, neither did I feel up to summoning a portal - the next step in the plan. What I finally did, was eating some grass.

Now - this was pretty useless - damn - the last one was really okay..


Some disconnected fragments:

#1) The people, who could guess, where I got this from, probably/hopefully? won't read this here - ähäm..
I conducted an experiment with my colleagues, where everybody got a small glass pyramid and - yeah - what? I can't remember what they were supposed to do with it. But some of them were fake - the wrong configuration. What came out, was that they did work, the proper ones.
I woke up from this - and it was a whole dream - and I thought, course I remember it - made coffee and pooof. It was great - there was a result, and further consequences - a shame.

#2) Now - that is something, which I'd love to do lucidly - but maybe there is even an effect like this:
I got a darts-lesson by Gary Anderson!! And it was as if I hadn't ever understood how to throw a dart - there were projected planes visible - hm - maybe like with a holographic projector - but more physical - you could keep your arm like in a tunnel, definitively straight.
Also no wonder - last night we've been playing for hours.
So - I should really incubate darts for such days.

#3) An argument with a friend of mine, who lives with us for the time being, how he should get himself a flat finally. But in the end I apologized.

#4) This motive again, that I have to pack my stuff together from a hotel room - or it was actually a rented mini-flat. And while packing, it got more and more. But after a while I "remembered" that it was a family holiday domicile, and that the stuff can stay, and that actually a lot of it belongs to my father.
I came across documents - letters - between my father and a friend of his.
They were pretty revealing - but unfortunately all details are lost to me now.
But it felt, I had found out something profound about him.

#5) Police again - searching for a vandalism-culprit - and I had found a plastic covered passport and further papers and gave it to them. But I knew, it hadn't been that guy. But it wasn't me either.
Bit disturbing, this.

3 dreams and 1 fragment - not so very satisfying..

#1) I was in my old school in the evening. There were Christmas festivities - a concert in the big hall and in some rooms there was food and chocolate St. Clauses - I was there with a friend, and we decided it is all boring and we go somewhere else.
When we came to the street - my friend took a strange vehicle - it was blue, a platform and something to hold on to on wheels. Now I think of it - it was like pallet transporter without something on it - or just one palette maybe - but all blue metal.
I asked her if it was hers - she said no - but took off with the thing and me on it in quite some astonishing speed.
And after not long, she had huge problems coordinating the thing - several almost-crashes.
In the end I jumped off and got on a bus, but that was so full, my face was pressed to the glass and everything else to other people.
Very happy, when we were finally where I wanted to go - the house!! - and I jumped off.
So this nasty house evaded my notice again.

#2) This was something with me finding a new domicile again. Very sweet - like in a garden colony almost - there were really small houses, bit Louisiana style - and they all had verandas and happy people sitting on them and having neighbourly chats and wine and food.
When I walked down this avenue to my house - a police officer came up to me and said, they would need me for asking questions about somebody else living in the vicinity.
I told them, I just moved in and don't know anything.
Then they asked me to come with them in one of the other houses, to take part in an observation.
So we went there - and they had built a fire right in middle of the room on the floor, with sand and some stones as a base.
And I thought, now this is clever - seems the houses had no heating - and I planned to do that at my home as well - studying the rather crude construction.
I was thinking, but this must be dangerous and illegal - but since the police themselves did it - it must be okay after all.

#3) This one was me being out drinking beer in a traditional Bavarian facility, lets say it so, after having gone hiking. It was then about where the best route for hiking and the best facility would be, so we went testing - some of the places do exist - it was actually not so much testing, but me viewing the possibilities with myself and the others in it from sitting there.
Bit weird - but I have that sometimes - I watch parts of the dream as in a movie.
There was a very attractive guy as well, with huge beautiful brown eyes - but I didn't talk to him.
Neither to a group of ex-colleagues, whom I rather tried to avoid - really disliking the one woman, who was their chief-hen in a way.
But I did talk quite extensively to the waitress, who told me about her sick daughter, and I tried to give a bit of useful advice.

Fragment:
I have a plan for a portal for my next LD - and lo and behold - I dreamt something like it, without getting lucid. Otherwise I can't reconstruct much - but I was walking, and like so often searching for something, when I came to a highway bridge, under which I found the portal, inlaid in a concrete wall.
It was pretty much like what I visualize - 2.5 times 2.5 m diameter, round, grey and with a middle bar and some decoration - but very unostentatious.
Yupp - don't think, I opened it - I guess, I would remember that.

Ah - but the good thing about this just came to my mind now:
I don't need to pretend-remember the portal in my next LD - I have seen it before!!

#1) Later more - It was weird - about what you can do with electricity and children - supposedly for their good..
#2) Later more - This was me on a quiz-show and in the end in an animated argument about hypnotizing animals with Joe Brandt.

I did a WBTB 5 h after going to sleep - first tried for WILD - but turned around after a while and be-mantrad my dream-signs. At bedtime I took 6 mg Melatonin - which left me completely fresh and awake today - not like with the 15 mg at all. Seems a good dose to me.

Tadaa - LD - actually this was just about the first quarter of my extensive plan - but I got it done exactly as I wanted to that point - the real adventure part is missing unfortunately:

These dreams with the old house used to make me sad - but now that I detect the thing more and more often - I look forward to them.
What led up to it, dreamwise, I can't remember any more - I was inside my old room when the realization came to me.
So first of all I counted fingers - 5 each - but I knew it anyway - did a nose-plug afterwards, which left no doubt open.
Then I started what I had planned as step one intellectual stabilisation with a bit of physical at the side.
I looked about and rubbed my hands - but mainly I told myself, who I am and what I am doing - dreaming competitively - having a plan.
I went through my plan and added up points for the maximum strike, having read that maths can make you clearer - also told myself, there would be no reason at all to wake up and that I should regularly re-stabilize to not loose lucidity.
I think, this intellectual stabi was quite good.
But then the phone rang - and I had a friend of mine on the line, the one, who is also interested in LD - and I was convinced, that this would be the first LD - real life connection - bubbling over full of revolutionary spirit.
In that talk - I suddenly lost optics - I concluded, that I had closed my dream-eyes to concentrate on the conversation, and put up a real effort to open them back up - what I finally did open, were my real eyes..
Not a big problem - DEILDed right back in.
Again RC and stabi - being sure of myself mentally - I stabilized the senses.
Including eating a jelly ball lying about - it tasted like sugar and cherry.
Then my grandma came in - I told her I got no time - got to go flying and teleporting to Nasqueron.
So I went outside, there was a spring-meadow with white and yellow flowers.
I jumped in the air and air-swam about a bit to have that over for the three-stepper - but I had planned on getting myself a flying carpet or platform to air-surf with, per basic summoning for the further planned journey.
So I pretend-remembered, that I had left it between the trees in the distance - went there and searched - and I found it - hovering maybe 10 cm over the ground.
It was a silver surfboard - I had been picturing myself surfing the air - but hadn't consciously pictured the Silversurfer.
I can't cease to be soo amazed at with what ease such things work!!

I stepped on it - but while trying to get it going where I wanted it to - I woke up.


Sooo - I'm going to wildly RC away today - and have a real incentive now to not botch my WBTBs with being lazy and turning over to sleep on.

Only recall again..

#1)
I've been visiting a friend - she got a call and had to go somewhere and asked me, if I could take care of her two kindergarten age boys.
So I say yes but over time, more and more children arrive and it is supposedly a birthday party - big chaos - I try to call the mother, but the telephone doesn't work, and I can't leave there.

Meanwhile the main problem is, that there is no cake and no present and nothing - I run up and down and try to prevent some accident or other from happening, and mess up cake-attempts repeatedly, rummaging around the flat, if I can declare something as present. That took a while, the rummaging, but I only found a lot of strange stuff.
In the end, I made a quite nice cake, a flat round thing with lots of something like sugar icing, but you could model with it - it worked like sand.
Yeah - it was like a snow-white sandcastle actually - I decorated in a sort of dripping fashion - like you let yoghurt viscose sand-water drip.
And red cherries.
They liked that.

#2)
That one was great - very, very vivid - again something with strange beings - not aliens this time, but some sort of age-old highly intelligent earthly species.
They were a bit less than a meter high, very round, almost no legs but big feet and beautiful big eyes - their fur was beige with a brown stripe down their belly - I actually forgot, how their arms were - even if they had arms - probably they did..

They had been secretly inhabiting the mountains for millions of years, so they said. And they contacted me and a group of people, in order to find an assortment of different substances, which represent the essence of the colour of the earth to our human perception.
It is pretty obvious, where I got that theme from - pertains a lot to the science-dogma thread.
We travelled and through beautiful landscapes - but devoid of vegetation.
Almost like on another planet, but not quite.
There were planes of differently coloured ground - stone and sand and also a white plane - like chalk.
We had something like a 3D pie-chart with compartments, where to fill the probes in, and which would in the end perform a computation to give these beings some sort of significant insight - shame I forgot their name -they gave it to me.
We managed to fill it up, and it spun around, and produced a result - to the delight of the beings.

#3) Something boring and frustrating - I was together with one of my ex-boyfriends, and we were having problems and quarrelling - I know, this isn't much of an info - but this was private stuff and mainly talking - and shouting and crying. Since I need every point - I take this in anyway - soz.

Okay - was a bit too busy and also lazy to journal the 3 from the night before the last one.
I have notes for this, though.

9/10:

#1) Back in school and this unfortunate topic again, that suddenly my certificate wasn't valid, and I was supposed to do the last class again - together with another woman, of whom I hadn't thought in ages.
I was running about and trying to avoid having to do it by talking to teachers, I had forgotten about also.
Sat in a physics class as well, and had desperately tried to understand something, but didn't, and wanted to keep that secret.
So not so fascinating all.

#2) Also set in that region, my dream-sign-region of Germany, but I didn't notice it.
Unfortunately the house itself didn't show up (hiding from me, you stupid dreamsign - are you??) - but I was on the job of convincing my mother, that she can easily make a living with her spiritual healing delusion there, and that she shouldn't sell the house and stay.
Since more and more rich and rather bs-susceptible women would set up a holiday residence there. To make my point, I took her to a quite successful woman, peddling in crystals, angelic messages and sacred herbs.
Among the latter - again they show up - blue bell-flowers.
Unfortunately, my mother hated "that witch" after not long an exchange of philosophies, and my scheme didn't work out.
Should have tried out the flowers in some way, now I think of it - I will include them in my ds-zoo.

#3) That one was better - very vivid and beautiful - while nothing much happened - I had lost my way, to where I stayed in an unknown city, and came across a really huge building - it was supposed to be a medieval cathedral (I know..), and it looked a bit like St. Peter - or a castle with a dome - from the outside, but all neglected and partly in ruins. I should have been able to take a guided tour, had I not again missed the time and entrance.
But I managed to creep under a metal fence into a romantically neglected garden and from there into the "cathedral" with the help of a kitten.
It was famed for being able to enter and leave where ever it wanted - not only there but anywhere.
It chirped like a bird and asked a lot of me - seen from an inner yard - the walls were missing - and it kept jumping ahead and disappearing and reappearing wildly.
Bizarrely - one sight was of a modern bathroom, wall missing to the garden-side, and I took a while to ponder, if they really had two showers and a bathtub in one small room, and if that was a good idea or not. Anyway - I just roamed about in the complex - doesn't sound special - but was beautiful.
Now I think of it - I didn't get to see the cupola from inside..


10/11

#1) I was in a new city for a new job and went shopping - upon entering a boutique, they told me, that in the basement, there would be a sale because the original shop would have gone belly up.
So I went down, and there was almost nothing left, but many people shuffling through the stuff.
Strange things - big cooking pots with garish flower design, huge plastic smurphs (supposedly very rare and precious), scaffolding material (? but people were buying it), glass-pearls - all ugly, tons of brown or grey coats with fake fur - finally I found a rack with rather nice clothes, just to see a teenager convince her grandmother to buy all the remaining reasonable stuff for her.
I know - were it not for the comp, I wouldn't journal such rubbish..

#2) I went with a friend to a pretty posh party - marvelling at how there could be so many beautiful and stylish people in one place. Turned out they were all some sort of artists - my friend had started working as a designer and thus met them. I felt quite uncomfortable with not having anything to contribute to their intellectual topics - about authors and plays, I had never heard about - turned out my friend was responsible for the costumes of a theatre performance of theirs. And they were missing an actress.
Persuaded me to jump in for that role - I agreed, but it didn't come to that.
We drove to the location, and the stage wasn't free, so we watched that play - some sort of comedy with Stephen Fry (loving this guy, the me).
I tried to find him afterwards, to get to know him - but - who would have thought it - I couldn't find him.

#3) Next missed dream-sign - visiting an old ex-boyfriend of mine - first he taught me a nice computer game - it was like go, but with stones in many different colours, and they all did something different.
In the dream this was easily understandable, but I can't reconstruct any of it.
His younger brother was very sick and I took it upon myself to treat him for it.
It was some sort of infection or maybe malign tumour.
So I did this and that - and it worked, but afterwards I had to search my body for something really nasty - like thick black hair, 2 cm in length - these came out of my skin at some maybe 15 places.
But it wasn't hair, but something parasitic - I had to pluck them, they were a bit squishy and came out of pores with a little plop - brrrr - disgusting!!

Well - conclusion from these two nights - only really enjoyable dream was the exploring of the domed antiquity with the chirping kitten.
Lots of failed attempts at something and frustration and even a little nightmarish touch with these parasites.
And loads of undetected dreamsigns.

Included in this night's competitive dreaming: a WBTB fail

Dream one:

It all began with me being on a science expedition in South America, looking for the mysterious beings, which had been reported to splash about in a broad and deep waterfall and sing to each other.
We found them and they looked quite unimpressive - rather like some sort of mobile coral - 20 cm times 10 cm small and consisting of brown lamellae forming a bunch of flutes. Just that - no heads or eyes or anything. They let air through themselves and did some compressions and so produced their curious singing.

Despite being wordless - they gave us to understand, that they are from a planet in our solar system - we knew, which one was meant, but I have no correspondence to a real one, from what followed.

For further exploration a rocket-launch-pad was erected - looking more like a dangerous fairground ride, which shot a sort of train in the sky at an angle.
I was a bit afraid of that and not on the first mission, but took part in a further one - I really dreamt this roller-coaster feeling in the stomach, when we accelerated.

Its a bit weird then - it feels as if I had later remembered having been on that planet when I was back, but I don't remember the stay per se.
Really weird - I remember telling somebody about it, being back down again - like a false memory - and that was accompanied by pictures, too. The planet had a fluid brownish red surface - that's all there was.


Dream two:

Nothing out of the ordinary here - once more removals to another city and looking for a flat.
I found something in a beautiful, several hundred years old, but huge house.
Inspecting empty, architecturally pleasing flats - another dream-sign of mine - same as me emptying out an old residence - there was a bit of that as well later.
Also happens often - I find such a flat higher than ground floor, but over the time of inspection, there always comes about a connection to a terrace or garden - to greenery outside.
It's in real life so, that I really insist on having a balcony at least.
So it was here - a balcony sort of morphed into a terrace over inspection - and it was soo beautiful.
A little inner yard with really old trees and wines and flowers, architecture a bit damaged in a picturesque way - a bit of an enchanted spirit. And my blue bell flowers again - could also be a dream sign.
Once I like a patch of greenery - they are almost bound to be somewhere, too.


Dream three:

Started with a bit of an argument with my partner - then we went to a public swimming pool - an indoors facility with a wondrous basin.
It was sloping pretty steeply, maybe 40 m long, and sported some waves and whorls, but had a rather still surface overall.
Theoretically the surface shouldn't have been staying like it did under normal gravity, since it wasn't a river, wasn't flowing through.
And I even thought about that - but of course decided, this must be some new entertainment technology..
We had lots of fun and frolicking - having the whole thing to ourselves later ..


Dream four:

I was visiting an old friend of mine at his parent's house, and they were hanging in his ears about marrying a suitable woman. He had broken up with his girlfriend, who was a complete bore, but would have fit right in concerning social status and financial background.
Was one of these strange dreams, where something is told and at the same time I can watch it like a movie. Here it was the mother, explaining how it all should be.
We got a peek into the lives of two daughters of a bank-director - bit ridiculous, like checking what sort of watch they wore, if they had impeccable style. Beautiful they were, and a story of a maritally created business connection of the families was spun out.
He didn't want either of them.

I just don't know, what to make of it - so again I get lucid - I notice I dream out of nowhere - and again I run into toiletory problems..
That while not practising toilet-visit-initiated RCs any more for a long while..

It was so - I stand inside something like a big garage - get lucid - but don't bother to first of all sort my mind out for further sensible proceedings - no.
I think instantly, that I want a spaceship to abduct me, start getting the garage more into a hangar and open the hangar door with my mind with the firm expectation, to see a spaceship outside.

It was all darkish and there was something more like a tank - at least it was green - na well.
Then it comes again - I absolutely have to go to the toilet - but I do remember, that I can just go ahead and do that, if I don't manage to get over this stupid phenomenon in a dream.
No problem for the bedding - it has been tried.

So and then I somehow loose coherence with the narrative - could be because with giving in to something rather not so overly meta-conscious - I literally lost it.

I must have entered the not really yet convincing space-ship-tank, got to some upper department, hid away lying on my back in a coffin-small space.
This unlikely facility finally provided me with a means to reach the illusory but enormously relieving feeling of dream-peeing.
But - one could have predicted it - not dreaming me obviously - this wasn't entirely adequate a means.

Dripping on metal gave me away - it was a real tank by then - and a quite unfriendly soldier started knocking from outside.
At least everybody seemed to be militarily on one side - so nobody shot me - but they really were not pleased at all.

It turned out, what the whole scope of the problem was, when somebody dripping and quite annoyed clambered out of a lower department, proclaiming I had ruined a secret military operation by wetting him.
He even had a moustache.
And I keep reading here, that gravity doesn't work in dreams!?
And why did I have to go up somewhere in the first place anyway?



What is this all about suddenly??
This definitively can't go on like this!

Was wondering, if I journal this - but then.
Such a stupid thing - I got spontaneously lucid just because it felt dreamy.
So I started looking around - tried to tell somebody, I would be dreaming, but again - he was a bit away and I raised my voice - well - tried to raise it - nothing came out.
Then it was tree-hugging and feeling - and my embarrassing problem from some weeks back again - I had an enormous urge to pee.
I was even lucid enough to remember, how this ended up last time - but it just didn't help - so I woke myself up - and yes - again I didn't actually need to go.
Made me really angry to find that out.

I've read some reports of strange things happening, as if one's unconscious mind wanted to get one out of lucidity.
I really hope, this is not my uncon's new trick on me.
It was like - stop the car and search the bushes urgent.

Now - I could of course have searched the bushes in my dream - but again - was lucid enough to worry about real life consequences.
Maybe I should ask around, if something like this really happens - probably not - I've done it before.
But that I didn't remember.
Damn.

Only good thing was this direct realization - no RCs, no dream-sign - just like that.
Well yeah - and a minute only - baaah.

Otherwise I was dreaming very enjoyably in my non-lucids - seems the mere prospect of the comp. does something to me already.

Other way round - I don't remember much of my dreams and nothing interesting - but I had two short LDs in the meantime and will keep record of it like this.

From one of my workbooks:

Well - anyway - I've been moaning about not meeting my main dream-sign irl - but a bit of activity almost two weeks back, with mantraing and visualisations on our old house - like recommended - gave me two further detections!!
Its sort of receding - I'm not living there any more meanwhile, it is about to get destroyed.
First time while being sick and not motivated in any way - I just slipped out of lucidity after taking a look around and dreamt on with my story.

Then last night was some weird back and forth reasoning:
The house - I dream!
Then - no, it's getting ripped down this day - that's why I want to get something out of the empty building.
Then - noo - it has already been, so I can't stand in front of it!

The normal dream, which I forgot by now - was something nice and I wanted to go on with it actually.
But the TOTMs came out just on time for this - since there were two DCs standing behind me - I thought take the first task in stride - and so I found out, that a woman with really beautiful long black hair - has as middle name Niniana!
Groundbreaking, earthshaking news!!

Shortly thought of the aliens - I have to and I will get abducted by aliens this month!!
But somehow I reckoned, I wouldn't have enough dream quality or control - and without so much as trying - I slipped back in non-lucidity.

So I guess I should concentrate on keeping up the motivation to actually do something lucidly - waking up seems not so much the problem atm.
My real life darting has a dip in the moment - so that went to the back of my mind lately - but this whole alien thing with space-ship tourism - I have to!!