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Just for doing any journalling at all:
I keep dreaming of knowing a place in the Bavarian mountains where a half-overgrown old ruin of a wooden house stands, forgotten and far off and I move in and sort it out a bit, make it beautiful, tend to the plants around.
And live there secretly, often in a kind of escape from something else.

I wonder how much congruence there really is from dream to dream about this house, it evolves I would say. And I love it.

Well - yeah.
Stupid, sort of - I really wanted to go on dreaming, what I was dreaming, wanted to get back to somebody's house.
So I got lucid and tried to fly there. But I got stuck in mid-air - nothing went forward nor backwards, just me hanging there and trying to air-swim. It wasn't really full lucidity, maybe that was why - only thing on my mind was getting back there and I woke up from my futile efforts. Shame.

Unfortunately did I wake up with a jolt, much too late, and found my husband had - well - done something that made me properly angry. So I was distracted from remembering my dreams of last night, and they really were something special.
What I remember:

I was in a sports-hall with a group of maybe 20 people and we were rehearsing a choreography, dancing.
When I went out to the loo, I saw colour pencils on the wall in the hallway, took them in with me - and somebody explained they were magical things, and one could write with them in empty space, in 3D.
So we did that - we connected all the dancers with a net of colourful shining thin lines, also connections to the room.

And then danced again. I felt all the other bodies - it was as if we were all one dancing organism, parts of a whole connected by these lines.
Amazing - never dreamt something like this before. It's even difficult to describe exactly what this was like - alien and beautiful, that is true for sure.

But again for some reason I shy back from daytime practice.
Not that I had a lot of time these last days - as can be seen with my almost not posting on here - but anyway - I need to get my act together.

There were other very intense and beautiful dreams that night - but this was extraordinary...

At least I read and printed out a MILD script from Dreamer - but I didn't do something, yet.
Na well - printing is a first step. And journalling this...

I went to a job with two friends from back in school - it was somehow shady and involved cigarette-smuggle and a guy, who ran a jeans-shop back at the time we were at school organizing it all.
They got cards, which could be used to pay in shops for their work - and we went to a clothes shop.
I forgot, that I had put on stuff and was wearing it, when we left - nobody noticed - so I stole an outfit, sort of, didn't go back in. It was in Munich and I wanted to show them the new flat, I was moving in soon, but lost them and lost the way.
Landed in some beer-place, met a guy there I know, old acquaintance, almost forgot to pay again when I left.
Then through the streets and erring about - finally I found the backyard towards which a window was going from that flat.
There was a backgarden with nastily sick plants, huge rhubarb for example, but rotting away. Been thinking, one should cut it all down, also the sickly trees, so there would be more sun coming to the window.
Then I was in the flat somehow and with a middle-aged not so attractive woman and a young nice guy, my flatmates to be.
They told me there would be a new sort of internet coming up, and they planned to pull off a porn-project by that means.
At the same time, one could look into another flat with broad non curtained windows, and there was another such project going on. Weird toys and guys in black leather masks - all very unattractive and not exactly appetising.
I thought - what the heck, they're only going to be flatmates - but when they let me know, they expected me to take part - I thanked them friendlily and got the heck out of there and to search for a new place again.

Hoping for better dreams and lucidity sooon!


Ah - and in a prior dream it happened again that somebody from a dream the night before showed up, clearly the same guy, but I only met him in the elevator and was hoping he wasn't angry with me still.
He was - but didn't say something - only gave me a mean look.
Thing is - I remembered almost all that prior dream in that dream - I had the full context and it seemed like genuine memory. That's a funny thing, I find - dreams bleeding over into dreams in the following night, but stuff which has no equivalent irl.

From the snippets - still quite okay recall - no lucids - but this was nice:

I found an animated book on the evolution of the mumins - soo sweet - and it had sound, the book was explaining what you could see. At the end they became enlightened mumins, which started with shining symbols hovering over their heads and then being assimilated into them. To be honest - I stole this book in the dream, and a friend noticed and told me not to do that - I said I only want to make photocopies, but it wasn't so - I wanted it talking...
How would I love to still know, what it said, or could draw the symbols.




Edit: Reading "Why We Get Sick" by Randolph M. Nesse at the moment.

One dream had me not finding clothes to wear to school - holes in the trousers, t-shirt too small, dress dirty - wasn't about the looks primarily.
My room was not any of my rooms but a huge disaster of having moved in not long ago and stuff hanging out of boxes or in heaps on the floor. And I was soo tired and out of energy, it all seemed to take enormous will power. When I finally made it to school I had to disrupt Latin lesson coming in, and was placed on a desk next to the teacher, facing class.
I didn't want to disturb more, but did so anyway by trying to find a place on a table in the back. It looked like there was space, but not when I arrived. So I disturbed more people - but a real life friend of mine became inexplicably angry with me and I thought, what a bitch...
Turned out it wasn't about me, but about how the school had given out chips for beepers, and if we wouldn't know where ours was, and went asking in the school-master's office, and it wasn't there - then we would have to pay for the loss.
But if we didn't ask and just wouldn't have it - all would maybe be good. Strange conversation.

Afterwards I read a sort of obituary of that teacher, but he supposedly wrote it with 110 years and still alive. About how horrible it would be to teach and how the small sister of a classmate of mine would now be doing Latin and ancient Greek and ethics class.

Then again - I had just moved into a two-room flat, also with chaos, similar to the above. It was summer, but a cold day and I was freezing in that flat. Thought about how that would be in winter, and if it was a good idea to have moved in there - the heating was with real fire, these classical east Berlin tile ovens.
Again I should have rather been in university but I decided to stay home and sort stuff out. Which I did, and I got pretty pleased with myself how it started looking orderly and comfortable. Even found a nice dress - just to remember that I hadn't gone back to the shop and paid for it as promised...
There was a banjo left over from the former inhabitant and I tried it out and it wasn't bad - I thought, it would be easier to play that in front of an audience than the violin, because the latter would be closer to my face..? I used to play for a while but didn't stop because of that...
My first boyfriend was there as well - and I only remember asking him, why we couldn't be together again (not remembering real life, not really). I forgot his reason.
Then another disadvantage of this flat became clear - no public transportation except for a horse-drawn cart - with very slow horses. I've been trying to persuade the "driver" to motivate his lame critters - but he said they would hurt their feet on the concrete and how I was cruel to want them faster..

Then it was about a science project with a corpse, but I forgot what we did there - or were supposed to, because something went wrong. We were thinking - what the heck to do - try to sneak it out and get a new one - not kill a person but steal a fresh corpse..?
What went wrong? Don't know, but the corpse got more and more hollow until it was just a shell, a wisp of a shell.

Then something weird - I really thought about this in the dream - I was watching a scene where a helicopter landed outside of an emergency-room and I thought, that the fact that one needs to physically call a helicopter in an emergency proves that there is no such thing as telepathy. Weell...

There was more, but I got enough of typing it up now!

Ah - but what does the Steph do every night?
Sort stuff out and/or schlep it through the landscape..

I have been through a lot of removals and was under way with luggage and hard pressed for time quite often irl, admittedly - but every night - come on!!?

For keeping count - night before last night was a short but not mini LD - I wrote about it in my DILD workbook.
Again it was so that early yesterday evening my real life stress took on levels of having to deal with it, and I didn't repeat my hypnosis as planned. A bit it is also so, that I am weirdly afraid of doing it - in order not to find out, I might delude myself on it's effect. Veery stupid. I know.

There was another interesting episode, though.
I was told, that at the end of a tram line there would be the second zoo of Hamburg.
And after giving it some thought I said - yeah - I've been there - and started to describe it and the partly weird animals they have there. In retrospect, it was again so that in-dream, I remembered another dream - several actually - with this zoo.
And built it into the actual one. By that the whole scenery and context changed - no more Hamburg, but I was where I had dreamt that zoo to be before.

I am so lazy journalling - I do go for recall upon waking up and either record on I-Phone or just think about it.
But meanwhile I am on the hunt of this in-dream remembering of another dream as reality.
It fascinates me.
So that's what goes in here.

It's no good, though, because meanwhile most 80 % of what I knew sitting in bed is gone by now.

But this is still quite clear - was so bizarre: I had a catholic priest seminarist as a beginning boyfriend and went to his lectures with him and got into a discussion with the prof. I think we had to leave then even - for some strange reason, the guy didn't dump me, but wanted to transform theology after what I had said.
Despite me not believing anything - I would have found out something important. Not exactly proof of god - but something almost equally impressive.
Forgot what that was supposed to be unfortunately.

Did my hypnosis session - and at least I dreamt of dreaming and the forum, even. And I have much more recall than usual - the below is by far not everything.

Crazy stuff - first I dreamt being at work with a friend from uni - and there was a scene, where I was in a conference room and got angry and threw my bag out of the window. With my camera in it and important paperwork.
Not much more from that dream - just that one needed a token to use the elevator, and if several people use one, you threw the extra tokens into a box. I threw mine, while she didn't have one and we took the stairs, and she told me, her unhappy love-story from years past had shown up again, and how she would suffer.

That was one dream - then the next one went on for a while and then it came to me telling people, that I would have dreamt last night of throwing my bag out of a window. A friend of mine goes - yes!! I have dreamt of you doing that as well - how stupid - out of the 23rd story-window and your camera was in it - and she knew more details.
Me - noo - it was only the third - got to go look for it..
And then it dawned on me - that sounds as if we had a shared dream!!
I thought about going on the forum and opening a puzzled thread - and explained to my friends, why I think, it can't work, and that I needed to search for a rational explanation, but couldn't for the life of me see one with all the details.
Stupidly, it didn't strike me as a strange idea to go around the hospital and search the ground for my bag - nobody knew where exactly that room had been.
It wasn't possible to access the ground around it so easily, so I got into a belated Christmas market in the middle of summer and other obstacles. And got woken up while still searching.

Something quite similar had happened to me before:
In a dream came a memory of having had a dream with exactly the (unfamiliar irl) setting of the actual dream - and my conclusion was - that prior one must have been a precognitive dream!

Dream:

I met my first love and there were two other women.
One of them I remembered - the other one a friend of his, too.
And we started recollecting, how we supposedly would have met.
Namely at a club, where the two of them were "bouncerines" - one with a bear-costume for some weird reason. And then we lived through this wrong memory - quite like it was for real, in the end, just complete different outer context.
Weird.

Fragment:

Digging around with my grandmother in that stone circle again, where her secret lab was under - nothing more.

The biggest problem in this comp was my recall.

Found out now, that writing is easier for me than dictating, when in a semi-asleep state - and - using my multiple alarm auto-snooze thing - I didn't get lucid - buut - have fantastic dream-recall for four dreams.

Got them in the book - won't put them over here - private/not interesting/being too lazy, the me - buut:

Got to mention this adorable dream-animal I found and befriended.
It was a bit like a rodent or squirrel - but the size of a dog.
With fluffy and a bit reddish fur and a long nose ending in a cute little black knob - constantly searching about.

It had whiskers almost all over and was vibrating with them and emitting a sort of purring - not exactly like a cat would - but similar.
Oh yeah - and it wanted to cuddle and play all the time - and look at everything with huge black eyes also.
I took it with me to that family I often dream of - and they all were delighted - didn't throw me out for a change..
I'd love to dream this one again!!
Actually - have one for real would be great!

Well yeah - as the title says - I am on about starting activities to induce LDs after having a bit of a break from it for no reason, I could name - so just to revive the practice..
Edit on 27.01.14: It was waiting for finally getting that alarm-app.
Been occupied with other stuff in the daytime - still am - but anyway - back into dreamland it is - I hope.

So - I dreamt about having to do removals again.
I had been living in a flat, which was originally a shared flat with two other students - and I had been alone for a while there.
There was a longish bathroom - a meter wide and some 5 meters long - and something didn't work with water drainage.
I had known that - but used it anyway - which lead to condensation gathering on the ceiling in a way, that destabilized it - was about to come down, when my friends came back from somewhere - was clearly my fault, and I had not cared - was about to move out anyway.
Edit: How nasty of me - can't remember having been really nasty - I now rather remembered, I had not expected something bad to happen - hm... There we go - memory sweetens over stuff - but I am actually happy to really remember that whole story incl. optics - except the faces of the others - maybe much of it also strongly modified memory - but at least I have something, which catches it - I do remember my bad consciousness, for example.
They were pretty pissed off about it..

Then some packing and deciding what sort of action to take - trying to find somebody with a car to do the transport.


Later a scene where I was at my old school - and there was a x-mas service for all of the school in a big auditorium - I decided to leave - wondering, why I had gone to a religious service in the first place.

And wanted to go to a party - and for some reason in the school-toilets - there was make-up stuff everywhere - not mine - and I searched through it to find something, which fitted me - from that I woke up.

There was more - didn't dictate - but all in that vein - pretty realistic and boring.
Naja - I hope I get my auto-snooze installed today - my husband promised, now it would work - what a hell of a mess to get at such a harmless sounding application for I Phone.

Been "terrorizing" dutchraptors LD-God thread for recommendations - and after ages got one from benni - just to run into crazy problems getting it.
So that is why he is on the case - and said with his computer at work - he can do it.
I refrained from trying to understand where the hell the problem with that now was..
Doing some RC-ing - mantras are prepared - and lets see, what the snooze can do - aiming at DEILD - and barring that - WBTB again!!

Transfer from my thread about it from the 15.11.13:

Woohooo! I did it and a long one
I am soo happy - finally!!


After one almost WILD and two mini-lucid episodes - finally - the big one since joining up here!!

Started out with me putting the alarm 4 h after falling asleep and trying WILD once more.
I almost managed - there were some strange sensations and slipping and sliding about - but I came out of these with too much awakeness after a while
And got impatient and fell asleep.
I use an I-Phone now for pre-journalling - and I had journalled away one first dream before.
The following dream had me sleeping over at a friend´s flat (both grown ups) - and I woke up there - and didn´t do a RC unfortunately.
It was a lot of fiddling, and the I Phone didn´t work (ha!) and she thought it was all bs anyway with my LD-thing - next was getting into an argument with two other women also sleeping there and this and that - got it all on tape.

I will have to do something with this thread - put it in my DJ or edit in here - I am again too impatient to take it one thing after the other.
Anyway - woke up for real from this false awakening - journalled - fell asleep.

And again woke up at this friend´s place.
And I thought - noo way - and made the nose-plug RC.
Three times, cause I couldn´t believe it anyway!
Yepp - lucid!

Told my friend so - this time she laughed and congratulated and I went in the air and zipped about her like some crazed bumble-bee or something.
Then we went out - she away the normal way and me through the window - a big one.
Outside was a nice park - not as heartbreakingly beautiful as in my second life-time longer lucid - but really nice.
I made a point of looking at things in detail - incl. my hands - and they were 100 % life-like - so good to use the plug - also the thumb through palm doesn´t work reliably - too strong of a body scheme I guess.

Okay then there were some older people standing about in a bit of a panic - telling me there was somebody suffocating behind some wooden houses - and she would have an orthesis like for broken cervical spine on her neck and they were very worried.
I was a bit worried then as well, knowing you can not simply take such a thing off and hope for the best..

First I did one more nose plug and then made fun of them - but anyhow - I got curious and wanted to see another scene so in the end I walked with one of the old ladies.
Forgot to ask anybody for what they were thankful for unluckily..
Also the other TOTMs..
Right - it was a young woman, fully healthy - no orthesis, smoking a cigarette and laughing at us.
The control thing is not yet ingrained - because I started freezing and flew back into this flat to search for more clothes..

Well - all in all I was really squealing with joy - it was great.
When I hovered over the piano - I saw several expensive vases.
Ah - dutchraptor!! - I thought and tried to do one of his tasks.
The first vase bounced off the ground - the second was already broken and just stood there as a jigsaw - but the third on - crystal-glass - that one broke really nicely - and I had no bad consciousness at all.

Really absolutely being sure, that this was my dream and only that.
Buut - next thing I tried - well - these windows were like many old houses have them in Germany - big window and above it - separate small windows - so small, you had to wriggle through.
I somehow knew I was afraid to do that - it was 4th story and I couldn´t like fly out normally - I was afraid to fall.
Bit disappointed with myself - I went back down and after not long woke up.

I would say the whole thing was several minutes.
As said - there is more, but nothing special and I simply had to churn out this thread now!
Thank you DV!!
Woooohoooo!!!