Suena

Been feverish and sick the past few days. I'm sure you know how dreams are when you're sick. Mine are full of deja vu.

I'm in a store in the mall. This store is very simple, white walls, shelves, nothing decorative about it. The products they seem to be selling are all fancy shampoos, conditioners, lotions, colognes. I'm looking at the colognes, wondering what to get T. I pick one out, but I keep looking. I see someone I knew from high school, Z, he acts reluctant towards me, like he's not that happy to see me. I just wave, and continue to look. I realize I'm running out of time and I cannot decide what to buy. I put my items back and decide to leave. I ask Z if he remembers where I parked, he just looks at me. I go outside and notice I'm in an unfamiliar place. I see my car suddenly, a few rows away. I'm crawling on the ground for some reason, I thought it would be faster. I get to my car and try to figure out which way I'm supposed to go. I started driving, and thought I might be driving on the wrong side of the road, but I didn't care. I wake up sometime after.

When I'm sick, my dreams are more emotional.

I only remember a fragment now.

I was in a house on the second story, there was this wrap-around balcony and in the yard below there were was a small pond with little jellyfish. There were a couple hovering in the air, one was really big and it was at my level. I was with someone, I believe it was a man, but I turned around to run back to the door and the jellyfish started chasing me.

shit. =) I'm so excited, I just had several lucids and false awakenings within a two hour period! I guess MILD really does work, two a few days of it! Too much happened in the dreams, but this was the most LUCID I've ever been. I finally could clear my vision and really communicate with the people in my dreams, even though none of them seemed interested in talking to me =(

I'll give you the highlights! My favorite part was me and a couple of friends were in an apartment building going UP and the elevator was tuggin along slowly and we were all looking at eachother wondering if it was about to give out. Sure enough, it started falling slowly at first back down, I told them not to move too much and as we neared the bottom, or after so much suspense, I was like WAIT A MINUTE. I put my hand out flat in front of me and willed the elevator to stop. It stopped and then I started pushing us up towards the top, but I told them to crawl out this window real quick just in case.

Another part I'm at my house and a bunch of family is coming over. I knew I was dreaming when my uncle showed up, cause he would NEVER come here, I doubt it anyway. He walked to the door and handed me two bags of trash that have been sitting on our porch for a day. (No, really, it's our trailer trash... =/) Anyway, I rolled my eyes and noticed it was all wet outside, I grabbed the trash and said "I was JUST getting ready to take this out." I go out of the house and sit down by a puddle of water. Just enjoying the lucidity. Looking around. Unfortunately I can't remember what I saw. Anyway, a lot of things happened, but I'm gonna quit right here. Just saying MILD was a SUCCESS.

Maynard was directing a movie at my house. Part of the house looked like the elementary school I went to as a kid. I was wandering the halls of the school, trying to stay in character. We didn't know what he wanted, he hadn't given anyone a script. He was getting frustrated with his assistant and I approached. I asked if I could take a look at his drawings. The assistant sighed as if to say, finally. Maynard walked to the couch and sat down. I followed after grabbing a cigarette. He had one too. He handed me the paper and there were little tiny drawings of houses and it had a storyline but everything had to do with the exterior of the house. I asked him to tell me, instead, what his movie was about. That's when he took me aside and told me that he was really scared and this was his first time making a movie. He also mentioned that he hated how he had to censor and only use certain words. Everything gets a little foggy after that. I remember hugging Maynard and coming back drunk and he and his buddies were laughing at me and practically had to carry me inside.

Somewhere in there, me and Maynard were outside and I was looking at a blood-red moon.

I believe this was the same dream, it had the same tone. A girl from where I used to work was hooked on heroin and I found her and Milla Jovovich in a bedroom shaking. Milla was still semi-conscious and I asked her how to help the girl. She said something about holding the bible with her arms crisscrossed and when I looked back down at the girl she had her arms wrapped around the bible and I could see the word "HOLY" on it. Then later in the same dream, I pass Milla in the hall and she wants to get fucked up. I try to tell her not to, but she's going anyway and she took my SON with her. I hadn't thought of it much until they returned and I was SO pissed at her. I took him in a room with me and started crying, feeling so bad, like the shittiest mother ever. That's when that girl came in and her eyes were dilated and white grey. I was speechless, I knew exactly what she was doing. Her drug dealer had followed in the room and sat down and started talking to this guy. He was saying that he was losing money cause people were so hooked. He was trying to give the girl a hint, but she wasn't taking it, willingingly, anyway. She was grabbing her clothes and my anger was so swelled. She told me she had to go sell some "pot" but I think she meant clothes. She didn't say aloud what for, but she waved her eyes in the dealer's direction and headed out the door. As she was leaving I felt the urge to say something that might help and stop her in her tracks. So, I yelled after her, "Tell your SON I said HI!" The dealer and his friend looked at me with half smiles, and they were like, "oooooo".

I can't remember the chronological order here, as usual, but I also remember being at a river that lead from one city to another. I was at this area where there was some sort of industrial contraption and a slow spill of green sludge was trickling down into the water. I was with my friend F and her daughter and my son. I don't know what we were doing there, but I was trying to build a bridge across. There were these weird green shells, I thought they were sea-turtle shells. I was trying to stack them up, but the more I pulled on them the looser the whole wall became. Then it was too late, I had started the spill and at the top was like a bucket of slime. I watched it slowly tip and pour into the river. I also vaguely remember getting stuck in the river.

I was driving down 9th street and I could hardly see because I didn't have my glasses on. There were certain cars I couldn't see at all until I was really close to them. I was trying to be careful and I was going to turn right on college, until I ran my car right in between two parked police cars, lights were flashing already, and there were two cars to my right that had been in a little fender bender. I remember the cop standing next to my window and he told me I was still rolling forward, so I pulled my emergency brake and started apologizing. They didn't really care, I guess I was just annoying them so they helped me back my car out.

Then my uncle left his baby somewhere and I had to take care of her, realized it was a boy when changing it's diaper.

I'm trying to finish up an online class but don't know how to save my work so that it's "turned in on-time". I try to get my friend, T, that is also in this class to help me, but he doesn't know either. I ask M and she says that we're going over it with a teacher tomorrow, the teacher's name started with R.

I was up for about an hour and a half with my son with the intention of trying a WILD whenever he took his nap. I browsed the forums and read a couple WILD tutorials and threads. Also, drank half a spark, which is an energy drink, but I was hoping it would help me maintain consciousness. It has about 500mg of Choline, and significant amounts of other vitamins. Hit the bong too. <3

So I lay down and I'm pretty relaxed already. I tried holding tension in my arms first and released and to the legs and feet, then my neck (which I find is hard to do.) I felt even more relaxed after doing this. After a few minutes I started to do reverse blinking, trying to keep my eyes relaxed and not force them open, eventually I noticed I had stopped blinking altogether and my mind was clear. I saw a few images and something disturbed me, I felt something crawling on my leg that I absolutely couldn't ignore. I decided to flip over to my side and shortly after I found myself in an unnatural darkness. I had my head between two pillows (really comfortable, imo.) I knew I had to be dreaming, but there was nothing in front of me. I tried to make the room as I remembered it appear and started to see the outlines but it faded and I was awake. I changed positions again and moments later I was on a bicycle headed uphill. There were at least two other people in front to my right and I passed a girl I know and was wondering if she should be riding pregnant, but even when I passed her I had a little lucidity. I wasn't exactly lucid to control what I was doing, but there was definately a difference. As I started to go up a steep hill following the others I passed a dip in the road, which I thought was going to be a little harsh, but I ended up gliding right along with the curve of it. Then as I approach the top of the hill, the others are at the peak, I realize how dangerous this is. I was waiting for a car to pop up, but it didn't. I went over the hill and the others had all gotten to the right because there was a curve going to the right behind a cliff, I couldn't see what was coming. Though I wasn't afraid really, and that's why I think I was semi-lucid. I was going to fast to go to the right side of the road, so I went along the left side and was prepared for an oncoming car, but I didn't see one. I got to the bottom and I was all the way on the shoulder of the road, opposite from the other riders. I woke up.

I changed positions again back to my left side. I think this is where I truly KNEW I was in paralysis. My right foot had gone completely numb, and I could hardly feel it. Then I felt it lift in the air and I knew what was happening, but that's when it felt like someone was pulling the blanket off of me and trying to pull me with it. My stupid ass thought it was my husband trying to wake me up, for a moment I knew what was going on but then I made myself wake up just to be sure. I even shook awake.

I think I'm getting closer if I keep trying, and this is the most success I've had, if you call it success. It's definately progress. Any more tips are welcome, tell me if I did anything wrong, or something else to try? Thanks for reading.

My dream last night was very vivid, but I don't remember a whole lot, at least not the order of the events. I was in a strange house that kind of reminded me of a semi truck because I was laying in a bed that laid across the entrance, like a loft or a camper. And behind me in his crib was my son. Something was going on in the town we were in and my mind kept switching from T to L. I didn't know who I should go to because I was really scared. So I went to L because I thought he was closest, and realized he was actually down stairs. So I went down and then for some reason we were running through the streets, it was dark and he told me to run with precision so the cops wouldn't find us. He told me when to jump and there was a group of people standing on a corner and they all had their shirts off and hoses. Then L yells "water sliddddde!" So we slide into some grass and then he gets up and starts running behind these joggers and then I'm thinking about streakers and how he reminded me of one by the way he was running. I'm not totally sure what happened next, but it was getting stormy out and I went back to L's place and it was kind of awkward between us. I could tell he really wanted to hold me, but knew he couldn't. I also felt the same way, but I knew I only felt this way because T wasn't around and I was scared. Our hands brushed once and I went upstairs to check on my kid. He was right where I had left him apparently.

Next part of the same dream I am quitting my job but I'm riding with a few co-workers to a game of some sort. I'm taking my son and we meet up with T somewhere and he gives me money, telling me that I have to buy this and that for W and make sure I got a wavy finger thing. I objected the big finger thing, the number one deal. He told me it was traditional. Then I remember something about making a shake with braums ice cream and I told someone they would have to let me make it for them sometime.

I decided to try a real WILD while the kid was napping. I used reverse blinking to help me relax and focused on my breathing, repeating the mantra, "I am lucid, The world is vivid." I could feel my body twitching but I don't remember transitioning into the dream. I was suddenly aware that I was showing my hubby an online video of some cute little babies. There were three babies and they were playing, then I realized that they were in a house that looked a lot like mine. I thought maybe they just live in a similar trailer (I mean mobile homes mostly have the same layout). Then I noticed the couch in the video was the EXACT same. I was starting to freak out a little, thinking I had been sent a video from the future. I started to awaken and before I opened my eyes realized that I was just tricked by the dream.

I opened my eyes for just a sec and closed them again, hoping to DEILD, if that's the right term for it. Soon after I was in another dream and I was sitting on the floor by the bookshelf. My son was asleep and my inlaws were at my house. They were acting strange towards me and I realized I had no shirt on, only my shorts and my bra. I felt embarassed and told them sorry over and over that I hadn't realized I had taken my shirt off. They laughed at me and again I started to wake up and realized I was dreaming when it was too late. =/

Then my son woke up, lol.