Thread: Sooo wish I was a girl.

The last post reminded me of this video.

I think it would be very intresting to be a girl..

I honestly have a very hard time. I have some gender issues myself. I'm really good at being a guy, and I have no problem playing the part. And most of the time it doesn't feel like I'm pretending to be something I'm not. If I were a girl, I would still act the way I do now most of the time.

But I struggle knowing what I am inside is not exactly what I am outside. Sometimes I have this horrible feeling like I'm just not comfortable in my skin. And I try to ignore this feeling until it goes away. I wonder what avenue I can take toward total self-acceptance. I wonder if I have to become what people would call a freak in order to be truly happy. I suppose it's worth it. I've already crossed Freak Road and found many people are accepting of me, and the people who are not were never worth my time to begin with, and it's far easier to spot these worthless people when you wear a Freak's colors boldly. It becomes easier to surround yourself with good people when you give yourself an appearance that judgmental people find distasteful.

But I still have trouble reconciling. If I were gay, it would be easier. But I don't know what I truly want. I love girls. I love being able to fuck them. I wouldn't want to give that up. But I want to be comfortable in my skin someday.

Tom Gabel, is that you?

I recently read that article in Rolling Stone. I don't know if that's where I'm headed or not. But I empathize with him.

Originally Posted by Omnis Dei

I wonder if I have to become what people would call a freak in order to be truly happy. I suppose it's worth it. I've already crossed Freak Road and found many people are accepting of me, and the people who are not were never worth my time to begin with, and it's far easier to spot these worthless people when you wear a Freak's colors boldly. It becomes easier to surround yourself with good people when you give yourself an appearance that judgmental people find distasteful.

Amen my brother. <3

I wish I were a girl but at least I'm tall, dark, and handsome.

Being a dickgirl might be fun.

Man im certain that being a woman can be ok,but if one day im gonna wake up and see 50 different pairs of shoes in my cupboard im gonna shoot myself.

Well it could be nice to try and be a girl for one day ,but even if I could do that I am not sure I would truly want to try it out. I think that we shouldn't try to change ourselves that much just because the neighbor's grass looks greener. We should accept who we are and keep living our lives happy. Even though I am not saying that you shouldn't change your gender if you feel that you should have been born as the opposite gender. Just think if that what you really want before you do such a thing. Anyways just do what ever makes you feel right and happy.

Then again people seem to have this tendency to suggest that all grass has equal levels of greenness, which I think is not true at all.

Originally Posted by Beefer

Well it could be nice to try and be a girl for one day ,but even if I could do that I am not sure I would truly want to try it out. I think that we shouldn't try to change ourselves that much just because the neighbor's grass looks greener. We should accept who we are and keep living our lives happy. Even though I am not saying that you shouldn't change your gender if you feel that you should have been born as the opposite gender. Just think if that what you really want before you do such a thing. Anyways just do what ever makes you feel right and happy.

Something puts you off about trying out the opposite gender. That feeling you get from this idea, that is how some transgendered/sexual people feel all the time. Their life basically feels incorrect. This isn't all of them, probably a relatively small amount, but those are the ones you hear about the most. An even smaller segment of this group actually goes through with a transition. To understand why they would go so far, simply get a grip of that feeling you get, when imagining being the other gender, and imagine that all the time, pretty much from the moment in your life you disover that boys and girls are different.

Originally Posted by ♥Mark

Then again people seem to have this tendency to suggest that all grass has equal levels of greenness, which I think is not true at all.

Well I am not sure if it is greener ,but I think we can both agree it has pros and cons. In my opinion (and that is just my opinion) it is hard to judge something from the side because sometimes you can't see the whole picture. Lets look at the amount of the information a person can get at himself and at another person. Lets call the first person "The Observer" and the second person "The Person" (as you can see I am very creative with the names I give ). Now "The Observer" can hear "The Person" and he can see him. He can hear stories about him from other people and by that sometimes get information about what people think about "The Person" which "The Person" might not know. Now "The Person" not only can hear what he says and see himself , he is also able to feel his body which "The Observer" couldn't do because he is not "The Person". In addition "The Person knows what feelings he is aware of, what sounds does he hear and what sights does he see. Now if you also add the memories, thoughts, dreams, perspectives and much more information that "The Observer" doesn't know you get a huge gap between the information each party has about the second party. We compared two general people , we didn't mention if their gender is different or not. Think how the gap between the information each of them have on "The Person" would grow if one was a boy and the other a girl. I am not saying that the genders are equal and I think that everyone can believe what ever they wish to believe , but just be aware of all the things you don't know and then do your thinking if it is better to be the opposite gender or not .

Originally Posted by Marvo

Something puts you off about trying out the opposite gender. That feeling you get from this idea, that is how some transgendered/sexual people feel all the time. Their life basically feels incorrect. This isn't all of them, probably a relatively small amount, but those are the ones you hear about the most. An even smaller segment of this group actually goes through with a transition. To understand why they would go so far, simply get a grip of that feeling you get, when imagining being the other gender, and imagine that all the time, pretty much from the moment in your life you disover that boys and girls are different.

The thing that puts me off about it might be that I know that being a girl doesn't fit me. Just like transgendered people doesn't feel right about being their gender I don't feel right about being the opposite gender. As you said this group is a minority and since it is that way I think that the majority should just be happy with what they are and not be miserable about what they could be.

Why wouldn't you transition if it improves your life quality?

Who said it does? If it would have improved my life quality maybe I would ,but I just don't see how it can benefit me. It seems to me as a waste of energy and money. Even those who feel they want to go through transition don't get such a better life quality from my point of view. That is because some groups in society mock them and look down at them. Even though I do believe that if your truly want to do such a thing you should ignore what everybody else says and do what ever makes you feel right about yourself.

I wouldn't mind being an attractive girl.

But... If I had to be a girl that was around the same level of hotness as I am as a dude... I'd pass.

Originally Posted by Marvo

Why wouldn't you transition if it improves your life quality?

If my desires were so straightforward that I could tell what would improve my life quality, I'd be all for it. Unfortunately, the two sit in conflict. I'm not a woman trapped in a man's body nor am I something inbetween. I feel drawn to both the masculine and feminine polarities, and I do not wish to embrace one and remove the other, nor to transform into some sort of hybrid of the two. Rather, I think I'd prefer to just go with the flow, and use my conflicting desires as a vehicle toward spiritual growth. Having this unobtainable desire makes me understand the nature of desire itself.

Originally Posted by Omnis Dei

I honestly have a very hard time. I have some gender issues myself. I'm really good at being a guy, and I have no problem playing the part. And most of the time it doesn't feel like I'm pretending to be something I'm not. If I were a girl, I would still act the way I do now most of the time.

But I struggle knowing what I am inside is not exactly what I am outside. Sometimes I have this horrible feeling like I'm just not comfortable in my skin. And I try to ignore this feeling until it goes away. I wonder what avenue I can take toward total self-acceptance. I wonder if I have to become what people would call a freak in order to be truly happy. I suppose it's worth it. I've already crossed Freak Road and found many people are accepting of me, and the people who are not were never worth my time to begin with, and it's far easier to spot these worthless people when you wear a Freak's colors boldly. It becomes easier to surround yourself with good people when you give yourself an appearance that judgmental people find distasteful.

But I still have trouble reconciling. If I were gay, it would be easier. But I don't know what I truly want. I love girls. I love being able to fuck them. I wouldn't want to give that up. But I want to be comfortable in my skin someday.

This was posted a while ago but I just read it now. Holy fuck, switch the genders in this and almost everything you said I can relate to.

I'm completely fine with being female, but feel that the way I think and the way I often want to express myself involve some things which are typically more masculine. Sometimes I think it would be easier in some ways to be male. Being socially withdrawn wouldn't feel as awkward, since men are more likely to be judged as awesome mysterious lone wolves instead of... just being rude, as I feel I'm often judged. There've been too many instances in which I'm with a group of people and am not talking much, and someone asks why I'm being so quiet, and I have a male friend who is also in the group but is talking even less than I am and no one thinks twice. I'm not naturally very expressive and putting on fake expressions feels wrong, but only women are expected to be expressive, so if I were a man I wouldn't have that problem either.

There are many more, but I definitely wouldn't say I'm a man trapped in a woman's body, because in many ways I feel comfortable being female. I'm attracted to males (mostly, although I think my level of attraction to females is higher than most women's). I like wearing dresses and pretty ornaments and things. I have a terrible sense of direction and a good memory (typically female traits). I can be really emotional and tend to concentrate on my feelings a lot, but I'm also quite logical and try to use reason everywhere and am good at math, which is more typically associated with males. I'm not sure how many of those things show real differences and how many are just cliches, but my point is that I generally feel like a mixture of both genders, and the acts I put on wouldn't be as difficult, in some ways, if I were male.

There's a certain quality which most females have but which I perceive myself to lack. It's... a socialness, girliness, I don't know how to describe it. I've been wishing recently that I had it, because I feel people would like me more, but when I think about it, it just wouldn't fit in with the rest of my personality at all.

I'm not sure where this post went, lol.

Originally Posted by Dianeva

I'm not sure where this post went, lol.

It went through your browser, down a series of tubes, into the DV server, back through the tubes again, out through my browser and off my screen into my eyeballs.

Oh.

Originally Posted by Drokens

Has anybody ever wished that they were the opposite gender. I wish I was a girl, as I think I would be much better at it. I think socializing would be easier for me if I was a girl. I'm not saying that it is easier for all girls to be successful socially. I'm just saying that I think it would help me a lot. The main guy from Synechdoche New York said this and I found myself identifying with him in many ways. I'll never act on this feeling though, because I'd like to avoid being labeled a freak by most of society.

Also, boobs would be a fun thing to have.

Anybody feel the same way? Male or female?

you know, i reckon as much as you want to, it may be totally different and not what you expected so youd hate it! but if you still feel this way in 5 years. Get a sex change ;p

I wouldn't mind being a girl for a week or two to see what it's like, but I think the boobs would be much more cumbersome than you'd think, plus I doubt it would be easy for me to part with Senior Pepe, I love him. <3

Originally Posted by Omnis Dei

I honestly have a very hard time. I have some gender issues myself. I'm really good at being a guy, and I have no problem playing the part. And most of the time it doesn't feel like I'm pretending to be something I'm not. If I were a girl, I would still act the way I do now most of the time.

But I struggle knowing what I am inside is not exactly what I am outside. Sometimes I have this horrible feeling like I'm just not comfortable in my skin. And I try to ignore this feeling until it goes away. I wonder what avenue I can take toward total self-acceptance. I wonder if I have to become what people would call a freak in order to be truly happy. I suppose it's worth it. I've already crossed Freak Road and found many people are accepting of me, and the people who are not were never worth my time to begin with, and it's far easier to spot these worthless people when you wear a Freak's colors boldly. It becomes easier to surround yourself with good people when you give yourself an appearance that judgmental people find distasteful.

But I still have trouble reconciling. If I were gay, it would be easier. But I don't know what I truly want. I love girls. I love being able to fuck them. I wouldn't want to give that up. But I want to be comfortable in my skin someday.

I doubt my life would be easier if I was gay/bi but I completely agree with this post. The only problem I have with Self-Acceptance is that it's impossible. To accept yourself you need to be accepted by your friends or peers on some level. And when it comes down to it that isn't self-acceptance. Humans are just to socially oriented to be able to be content with what only they think of themselves.

I think it is difficult because we do depend on other people to some extent. But I think we can accept ourselves even if we still have to hide our true identities to some extent. I've heard enlightenment describes before as the completely understanding that to the very core of life, everything is just fine. I agree with this. Even if you live in conflict between your inner self and the self you present to the world, that's okay. You're allowed to be a little conflicted, and you don't have to torture yourself because of it.