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    1. Commanding a Trailer to the Enchanted Forest

      by , 06-09-2020 at 07:26 AM
      Morning of June 9, 2020. Tuesday.

      Dream #: 19,531-02. Reading time (optimized) 3 min.



      My dream begins with indoor-outdoor ambiguity. Although I am in an unidentifiable rural park in Wisconsin before dawn, I am first near a wall that holds the essence of a room when my dream self becomes aware. I am listening to a vinyl LP with my thoughts being that I can change the wording of the spoken audio, which seems to be a business missive. It is as if I am editing and clarifying the implied text with my mind even though it is on a 33 1/3rd rpm record. At one point, I see the individual words on small movable virtual cutouts that I can rearrange on the record’s surface.

      I go to a small teardrop camper caravan a short distance away. (It is similar to the image, but its door faces the trailer hitch, and there are two sliding windows on each side.) I want to lie down inside it to rest, but I have to move several clusters of full beer cans that are on plastic yokes. (I have hardly ever drunk beer in my lifetime.) I eventually clear an area through the middle where my body fits, my head at the back. I open a sliding window a short distance, pulling it to the left, above my left, and appreciate the coolness of the fresh air flowing through the screen.

      Eventually, the little caravan starts moving. It is daylight now. Looking through the doorway, I see my brother-in-law Bob and my sister Marilyn in the front seat of a car that is pulling the trailer. (They are both deceased, but my dream self does not remember that.) Marilyn looks at Bob (who is driving), telling him that he forgot to unhitch the trailer, and she acknowledges me by looking back. Even so, he continues to drive to the Loomis Street house. I vividly feel the movement, especially as the car goes up a ramp to an overpass. When he drives near three semi-trailer trucks (on the right) that are emitting black smoke, I unhitch the trailer with bodily movement and mentally “drive” it down a different street, now while sitting up in its center. I consider this is legal, as there is a license plate at the back. Even though the caravan only has one pair of wheels, I successfully “drive” it to the Enchanted Forest (a fictitious recurring location in my dreams since childhood, though always different).

      I follow a boy down a hallway that opens into one section of the forest that is now part of a resort. There is an enclosed area with small monkeys and an eohippus (miniature prehistoric horse) here and there. One eohippus is lying on its left side (as I am in reality). I wonder if it is alive. The monkeys are only about eight inches tall. I pet a few of them.

      I instinctually vivify and sustain my dream by walking on the fence of the enclosure (a dream enhancement routine since childhood), increasing vestibular-cerebral perceptual integration. I look down to my left at a car with its doors open, wondering if the people think I am intruding upon their privacy. After I practice balancing for a few minutes, I jump back down into the animal enclosure.

      I discuss the Enchanted Forest with Locke, Sawyer, and Jack from the “Lost” television series. I describe a false memory regarding Jack driving me through an area of the region, which took a couple of days, being that it was of a different dimension that the rest of the resort. I tell them that one section is infinite.

      I call them over to look at a beautiful lake after going into “another world” through a door. We gaze at the extraordinary beauty. Several tourists are around, also appreciating the sight. I see a few small fish below the surface of the water and try to perceive more. The vividness and detail are unfathomable.

      After several minutes of appreciation, my dream begins to transition again to an instinctual awareness of my body being horizontal in bed, as well as a need to initiate waking (for me to get up and use the bathroom). As a result, I try to open a couple of bathroom doors, but Locke yells about needing to elude someone. It is Rowena King from “Emergence.” We all rapidly crawl on our bellies as does she, though she remains about ten feet behind us. We all crawl quickly on white sand underneath the underside of an unfinished building’s floor as I wake.


    2. Wall Mediation Oddities and Using a Portal

      by , 03-24-2020 at 06:24 PM
      Morning of March 24, 2020. Tuesday.

      Dream #: 19,454-02. Reading time: 2 min 40 sec.



      Surreal distortions and unique false memory constructs integrate with the routine dreaming processes in the standard order, with mostly a passive narrative (predictable preconscious eluding) with typical virtual amnesia. My waking-life identity meanders in and out in this exceptionally long dreaming experience. Instinctual summoning is a factor, but it never emerges into full lucidity, only liminality in the last scene.

      In the first scene, I am at the false location of La Crosse at the Loomis Street house. The house to its right (also on Loomis Street) when viewed from the street, is fictitiously inhabited by Earl (half-brother on my mother’s side; deceased). Bob (brother-in-law; recently deceased) is present in his house. (I have no recall of their deaths.)

      I walk several blocks south of Loomis Street (on Sill Street) when I become annoyed at two homeless men walking around in (and possibly living in) my dumpster (that is otherwise mostly empty). At this point, I am aware of Zsuzsanna being to my left. Unknown people are with us. I tell the homeless men to leave, but one of them pushes a big concrete slab against the door, so it cannot be opened (even though dumpsters do not have entry doors like this in real life). I become angrier and tell them that there are shelters for homeless people. They do not seem to want to listen to me as I repeat myself several times.

      Wall mediation (second stage) becomes viable with a chain-link fence defining the division between dream space and potential liminality (with similar processing dynamics as “An Unexpected Late Night Visit” from March 17). The homeless men are now in someone’s front yard on the other side of the fence. I summon a gun and shoot one of them. He somehow becomes embedded in the fence. I shoot at the other male, but the bullet gets stuck in the fence and does not reach him. (In the March 17 dream, I was in our present home with a sleep-wake mediator outside of our fence. Earlier, I deliberately hung a scarecrow on the fence. Also, I threatened to use a gun but did not.)

      Processing dynamics and instinctual elements meander, and as a result, I suddenly consider I may have committed a crime. I walk briskly with Zsuzsanna and the unknown people east down Sill Street to be out of sight in case the police arrive. I had left the gun behind and suddenly consider my fingerprints might have been on it. I return to the invalid construct of the houses on Loomis Street. Even though Bob and Earl are still standing around, the houses are missing. Only sunken foundations are left. I decide to run to the King Street mansion with the expectation of a portal in the middle room on the east side (second floor). My waking-life identity is gone again.

      After going through the portal in the big closet nearest the entry door, I am technically in the same world but phased to be invisible and intangible. I walk past police who are talking to the King Street landlady. They ask her about my whereabouts and in what organizations I had been. I fly and phase through buildings, going north.

      Instinct triggers typical subliminal awareness of being in bed. I find myself on the side of a mountain with an unknown female (probably Zsuzsanna in my absent waking-life identity). I am under a blanket with her as she sleeps. She rolls over and seems to see me, and I am somewhat surprised. “Oh, you can see me?” I ask.



      In a vivid offset dream, I am high above an unknown city. Instead of flying, I leap about ten feet from one ledge to another (along its length) and kick over small stacks of books that are in my way so that most fall from the narrow walkway. There does not seem to be enough imaginary proprioception or emerging physical awareness to trigger a myoclonic jerk as otherwise near the beginning of every sleep cycle.


    3. An Unexpected Late Night Visit

      by , 03-17-2020 at 10:07 AM
      Morning of March 17, 2020. Tuesday.

      Dream #: 19,447-02. Reading time (optimized): 3 min.



      Dream sequence 1 is predictable sleep-wake mediation of emerging liminality stemming from my instinctual recognition that dream state physicality is not real. An imaginary fence defines my skewed perception of potential liminality as a virtual barrier between sleep and consciousness.

      In this instance of the usual process, my dream incorrectly establishes that it is Halloween (an incidental association with the false identity of the dream state). Another error (to stop waking-life agreement) is that the fence on the west side of our house is not a solid wall. The events occur late at night.

      At this point, precursory liminality allows for my recall of Zsuzsanna (though the recall we have children initiates later in my dream). Additionally, as a result of the dynamics of this process, I have a viable recall of where I live in waking life (rather than the usual false setting). I am setting up a scarecrow, using some of my clothes, as a Halloween decoration. It is on the inside of our fence near the northwest corner. It is my instinctual analogy of validating my dream state physicality as false but still as a precursor to potential physical discernment. (A scarecrow has occurred as this signification in previous dreams, though statues and dolls are more common.)

      Dream sequence 2 is further activation of the foundational process as previously described and explained. It stems from physicality becoming a more emergent factor but also inclusive of disguised recall that I have a young daughter. As a result, an unfamiliar black girl (of about seven years of age) stands to the left of the outside of our front gate (from our porch’s viewpoint) where the mailbox is in reality (though it is not present in my dream). (Being near the mailbox location, despite its erroneous absence, is a factor of sleep-wake communication or, assuming enigmatic space is overlapping into my dream space, transpersonal communication, probably from our daughter.) She aggressively shakes the vertical bars of the fence, making an incredible racket. I tell her to stop, but she continues.

      “I’m going to get my gun,” I say through our open front door, though I am not serious. I want the unknown child to go away even though her presence is the result of deliberate summoning to vivify my dream, which it does, exponentially. (A gun is typically the result of the fictitious dream self attempting to maintain an illusion in contrast to the reticular activating system initiating, which is otherwise the natural progression of sleep-wake transitioning.) The child does not leave. I turn left to ask Zsuzsanna where the gun is. (Zsuzsanna sleeps on my left.) I have the false recall that I own a gun and that it might be on the DVD player (association with imagination, correlating with watching movies). The girl eventually leaves but comes back with her father.

      Dream sequence 3 establishes that emerging liminality changes the direction of my dream. The girl and her father are in our lounge room. At first, I see it as an intrusion. My dreaming status resets and loops with different events five times. In the third loop, there are about five members of the girl’s family entering our home, including her mother and an older sister. I am puzzled and ask them how they are doing this. One of them points at the outside of our front door, and I see that there is a silver key in the door’s barrel lock. Still, at this point, my dream has reset again, and the family is only now arriving on our porch.

      Suddenly, I recall that I have a young daughter (which eventually unlocks recall I have additional children). I think she might like to meet the unknown girl. I no longer see the people as intruders even though I did not ask them in. I look around, but I cannot find her. I ask family members where she is.

      Dream sequence 4 is the fourth form of liminality mediation when the unnamed man sits down on our couch to watch television. I notice that, as he is sitting down, a much older man than him on the television screen is sitting down, mirroring his actions, though he has a white beard while the man in our lounge room has no beard. I find this amusing, but I do not comment on it.



      The man on television, with his short white beard, correlates with my waking-life identity, triggering my waking.



      Overall, this is the same preconscious template as in thousands of previous dreams.


    4. Pulling a Rope (Buckboard Wagon)

      by , 10-05-2019 at 10:02 AM
      Morning of October 5, 2019. Saturday.

      Dream #: 19,283-02. Reading time: 1 min 15 sec.



      I am in an unknown ambiguous setting with the common factor of indoor-outdoor ambiguity. The area is not well-lit. While it is implied to be outside, I also sense it is inside a big building with a high ceiling. The floor/ground is smooth.

      I am pulling a rope from a horizontally-oriented reel on a buckboard wagon. I vividly feel the movements and sensations in my arms as I pull the rope. The wooden vehicle is at least six feet away (facing away), and the reel, its width nearly that of the wagon, is under the seat. The rope is coming from up and behind the reel.

      I am guiding the rope at about waist-level to an unfamiliar man who is standing about six feet beyond a cattle fence. He, in turn, is guiding the rope to an unseen man farther away (whom I sense may be sitting or lying down). I am unaware of a backstory that might explain why I am here. Eventually, the end of the rope prevents farther pulling as it is attached to the reel.



      The unseen man is my potential emerging consciousness. The man I am guiding the rope to is my preconscious (the personification of my reticular activating system and vestibular cortex) though here as a subliminally summoned vestibular witness (for correlation and potential coalescence). The buckboard wagon is autosymbolism for my physicality while in the dream state (as all single vehicles often are). The rope, attached to the reel/“real” ends because my dream self’s fictitious mental model cannot move my real physical body. In this case, the fence is autosymbolism for the virtual division between subliminal and liminal space, though typically the division between subliminal or liminal space and wakefulness. The reel is under the seat of the wagon as an association with being able to get up. (In this case, there is no drop or anticipation of one.)


      Categories
      non-lucid
    5. Not Lucid But Mediating Every Dreaming Process Anyway

      by , 03-19-2019 at 10:57 AM
      Morning of March 19, 2019. Tuesday.

      Dream #: 19,083-04. Reading time (optimized): 3 min.



      This incredible dream sequence is long but with the longer second part offset from a vivid foundation where I eventually mediate and viably control several common REM sleep processes understood since early childhood, atypically in the same dream, yet with no emerging awareness that I am dreaming at any time.



      Sky mediation integrated with window (liminal space division) mediation (which is a form of concurrent environmental monitoring with subliminal RAS/cortex gating):

      In the beginning, I am indulging in atypical sky mediation (from indoors rather than outdoors) without viable lucidity. I am in the lounge room of the Stadcor Street house (incorrectly recalled as my present home) and standing near the front windows. This anticipation is low-key. I do not focus on “something coming down from above” as in many past dreams, but I am subliminally manipulating the amount of light and color in the sky. At the same time, I am vaguely aware of an “invisible” video superimposed over one area on the windows, but I focus only on the sky beyond. I consider, without emotion, if the sky represents the “end of the world” (analogous to the “end of the dream state”). Many colors are present, but red and yellow dominates. I gaze at this process for several minutes.

      Identity mediation integrated with doorway mediation (as sustaining the dream state) as well as subliminal dream state awareness (the presence of the beds).

      I find myself in the King Street mansion in the second floor’s middle room of the east side. I have a false memory of the landlady having changed the way she rents rooms. She now has it so that two people have to occupy each apartment, each paying twenty dollars a week instead of one tenant paying that amount. My false recall is ambiguous, but I consider that she has done this to make up for me having lived there without paying rent for so long. Leonard is sharing the apartment with me. I walk across the hall and see a young platinum blond male in his room near the right side of his bed. He is unsure of who he wants as a flatmate. I suggest my friend Rick (saying his full name) but then consider that Rick might be too old to live with this person and state as such to him. (This does not make much sense, as I perceive Rick as being about twenty years old, even though in reality he is in his fifties as I am.)

      I have several different types of keys, one a skeleton key that I joke about with Rick, to determine which one works with the door of my room. There are little keys as well as more obvious house keys. I eventually find the correct one. Rick now seems to have taken Leonard’s place.

      From here, I go downstairs (transitional vestibular system correlation). The landlady seems cheerful. Two unknown people stand in the unlit foyer talking to her. I hear the woman say her name, and her last name is the same as mine. I comment on this as I leave the house.

      It is now daytime. It turns out that the woman, now a young girl, is my niece. I walk atop a fence (linear vestibular system correlation and mediation of liminal and enigmatic space), and she becomes the vestibular system simulacrum (personification of vestibular system adaptation). She continuously cheerfully talks to me about how I should walk atop it, regarding balance and distance of steps, which now becomes a series of fences. She is usually on one parallel to the one atop which I am walking. I now get the impression that we are walking to school (relearning emerging identity and subliminal cortex awareness).

      Two nieces and two nephews (on my father’s side) are present, though they are much younger than they should be. After becoming aware of this scenario without full current conscious self identity, I walk down the sidewalk near the front of an unknown house where two of my nephews are standing. The oldest is talking about how much fun he had surfing recently (a result of reinduction processing which does not continue). I tell him that I saw him surfing in a photograph as if to validate his experience (which seems like a false memory) and he seems puzzled by this as I consider I may be mistaken. The process fails (water not moving, melatonin flow stopping, similar to water lowering waking autosymbolism), and I then meander around the unfamiliar neighborhood until I wake.


      Tags: fence, keys, sky
      Categories
      non-lucid
    6. The Fence that was not a Fence

      by , 01-02-2019 at 12:09 PM
      Morning of January 2, 2019. Wednesday.

      Dream #: 19,007-02. Reading time (optimized): 1 min.



      My dream self is involved in fictitious associations with Cubitis (where I have not lived since 1978). Dennis (a half-brother on my mother’s side whom I have not seen in real life since 1994) is present. Several random people are present. It may be a vague association with New Year’s Eve.

      My dream’s location eventually changes to being that of the backyard of the Loomis Street house. I am behind what seems to be a fence, looking west, in the southwest area of the yard. I am also vaguely aware that the “fence” is the foot of a bed that I am “sleeping” in, though I am sitting on my knees and leaning against it. It is metal and oversized, with vertical bars. Dennis walks on the other side, at least six feet away, walking to the left in my view. (This orientation is atypical, as waking orientation is most often to the right, though I am probably mediating his direction to prevent his presence from being an emergence factor.)



      A fence is a factor of reticular activating system mediation that concurrently defines the distinction between the imaginary dream self and the emerging conscious self identity. Here, it additionally correlates with the subliminal perception that I am sleeping and directly represents my dream self peering into the enigmatic space of preconscious activity.

      In addition to [fence as RAS mediation], there is a factor of one of the “crucial three” [literal bed space emergence]. There is also the [preconscious simulacrum mode two] as Dennis.


      Tags: bed, fence
      Categories
      Uncategorized
    7. Almost Superman

      by , 09-29-2018 at 08:08 AM
      Morning of September 28, 2018. Friday.

      Reading time (optimized): 3 min. Readability score: 54.



      The library setting is where my conscious self identity, as in waking life, often carries and holds my dream self in an attempt to hold dynamics of intelligence and memory that typically cease to exist in non-lucid dream states, as the non-lucid subconscious and its personification as the dreamer has no viable connection to the unconscious mind or real life. Since early childhood, I have often tried to manifest books or something to read to bring about viably lucid threads of the emerging consciousness, which sometimes works to vivify my dream self’s status, but in this case, it is only the library with no focus on any specific book.

      The otherwise unfamiliar library is close to my conscious self awareness but without viable lucidity or conscious self identity. (I do not know the implied country of its location.) My dream self is aware that I am asleep and dreaming, but it is a subliminal factor, that is, my dream self and conscious self have not coalesced. Physicality and tangibility still increase significantly. I am aware of the preconscious avatar sitting to my right and reading a book in the passive monitoring of my dream self’s status. It is an unfamiliar man of about fifty. I become more annoyed, as he is crowding me. I continue to maintain my focus of sleeping on my left side, as I am in reality. My dream continues to vivify. It is all thought and physicality. There has been no imagery yet.

      Finally, my dream self achieves the mode of non-lucid dream control, established by the essence of the library, but without my conscious self identity. Vestibular system correlation commences, and I have thoughts of being a superhero. I fly around for a time as I usually do with this primary dream state factor. Despite not being lucid, I am familiar with the nature of creating and controlling my experience.

      I consider that I am Superman, but not “the” Superman. At one point, I decide to have a blue cape rather than a red one. Eventually, I also see that I am wearing slacks and have mismatched socks. I have a blue sock on my left foot and a white sock on my right. I mentally will the bottom of my pants legs to tighten, grow longer and cover my feet, more so from the idea that superheroes do not wear regular pants. Despite having willed my cape to appear and eventually changing its color, I do not contemplate changing either of my socks’ colors.

      In my dream’s final scene, I walk inside an area in the afternoon where a chain-link fence, of about ten feet in height, encloses an unknown warehouse. It turns at ninety degrees to match its adjacency to the building’s outer wall. There does not appear to be an exit on that side. (A fence of this nature is the synchronous division between the dream self and the conscious self and the subliminal distinction between the illusory physicality of the dream self’s fictitious body and the status of the real physical body in REM sleep.) The space is narrow. Still, I stop two criminals, both unfamiliar men, from stealing a device relating to communications technology. This scenario is the typical precursory RAS modulation and ultradian rhythm correlation, its rendering for curbing potential unchecked sustainment of the dream state, more so as a concurrent REM sleep safeguard than having anything to do with real life.

      I carry the device back around the corner (RAS mediation) to see the owners of the warehouse. Even though the avatars are standing on each side of me and all can see, I have to describe what one criminal looks like to one of the warehouse owners. The avatars to my left are potential dream state revivifiers (I sleep on my left side), whereby the ones on the right are active preconscious (and possibly interconsciousness) threads. The communications device, which resembles a small shortwave radio, merges and coalesces with my dream self and subliminal conscious self identity, and I wake as a result.



      Additional notes: Mismatched socks represent the distinction between the fictitious dream self and the conscious self identity. It is one of those renderings that have occurred since early childhood in all modes (subliminal, liminal, and lucid) of the dream self. In lucidity, I am aware of the meaning, as I am aware of the dreaming and waking processes and how specific patterns manifest. It is not “symbolism” in the conventional sense as many people believe.


    8. The New Fence (precognitive or telepathic)

      by , 07-06-2018 at 01:06 PM
      Morning of July 6, 2018. Friday.

      Dream #: 18,827-02. Reading time: 1 min 12 sec.



      While dreaming, I was aware of workers arriving, in reality, to work on our new fence (which has been drawn out over several weeks, so we did not expect them to show up this morning). The noise enters my dream at times, creating a typical imaginary intruder scenario, where the men seem to be walking around in our house as we sleep. As it becomes quieter, my dream transitions into a pre-liminal mode where a fence defines the virtual division between dream space and the threshold of potential consciousness.

      The preconscious avatar (or cerebral sleep-wake manager, as an unknown male) starts talking about our new fence, which I see has gaps (that is, not a privacy fence of the type they had been building in reality) and different from the previous front ones (that were also solid) of the other houses. There is an intriguing conversation that makes no sense, though my dream self perceives it as having validity. He talks to me about painting the bars green so they match the lawn, which would supposedly render our house as invisible from that angle from the public footpath and street. Despite how ridiculous it sounds, my dream self perceives it as possible. A member of the public walking past our house would see our lawn and fence bars at the same time, and it would seem to them like a solid wall.



      They did build an open fence after having spent time on the high privacy fence at the beginning, which makes no sense, especially as they took the privacy fences down from the other two houses and replaced them with the type from my dream. I could consider this as precognitive, but since the workers knew what they would be doing, telepathy (for lack of a better word) is more probable.


      Updated 07-11-2020 at 06:49 PM by 1390

      Tags: fence
      Categories
      non-lucid
    9. Liminal Space Division: Bed, Cat, and Fence

      by , 06-11-2018 at 06:45 AM
      Morning of June 11, 2018. Monday.



      In my dream, I become aware of how (as in reality) some workers are near our house early in the morning, working at building a new fence and possibly, at least eventually, taking down the old wooden fence on the west side of our backyard. Looking past the foot of our bed, Zsuzsanna not being present, I notice that the left end of the present wooden fence is incomplete and the vertical boards that are now about half the height of the rest of the fence have a splintered appearance.

      I am holding onto our youngest cat, more to my left. I have a growing concern that I will be seen and my privacy invaded. Through the fence, I can see movement of one of the workers, though he does not look through the fence or notice me at any point. Each time that I consider getting out of bed, I decide not to, though the nature of my physicality seems somewhat strange, almost like a virtual rubber band in starting to get out of bed and absentmindedly being pulled back. For a short time, he is also seen above the shorter boards, yet does not look my way. Our old fence is apparently being taken down and I remain annoyed that I will be seen and likely imposed upon. My dream soon fades without incident.



      I have always found it amazing how RAS so often modulates the dream state to where it supersedes or otherwise distorts legitimate memories, which of course is proof that the non-lucid dream self usually lacks viable access to the unconscious mind (a truth that most people completely ignore in favor of the myth of “interpretation”).

      This dream features the following typical factors that have remained consistent in my dreams for over fifty years:

      The ambiguous awareness of simultaneously being inside and outside is a main factor here. That is, even though I am in bed, I can see the fence beyond the foot of our bed, with no awareness of the wall of our house being present in this line of sight. This is not only unrelated to the nature of waking consciousness, it is something that cannot even be perceived as such in waking consciousness.

      I am in bed, which is a dream state indicator. That is, I am subliminally aware that I am asleep in reality. In my dream though, it is a single bed, which I do not contemplate as such. This is a result of my subliminal awareness that Zsuzsanna was awake in reality.

      In the real world, regarding directional orientation, there is no fence a few feet beyond the foot of our bed, so this feature is inherently incorrect. (In reality, the implied fence of my dream is beyond the head of our bed and our kitchen is beyond the foot of our bed.)

      Holding the cat (especially on my left, the direction of dream awareness orientation) has served in the past as a dream sign (even though we have pet cats in reality), though I am not viably lucid. A cat is a liminal space denizen and a “witness” to the nature of the dream state of which I had especially used as such in lucid dreams in childhood, such as “The Pink Triceratops”. This, and my lifelong knowledge of dream state autosymbolism, despite the fact that the event is also based on a literal focus in real time, can only designate a subtle level of non-lucid dream control.

      A fence is an autosymbolic liminal space divider by way of typical RAS mediation. This means that it serves as the division between the dream self identity and the conscious self identity as well as the preconscious bulwark between the illusory dream state and legitimate waking life perception. RAS is personified here as the worker who may be taking down the fence, which is simply autosymbolism for the waking process.

      So how did RAS mediate this fictitious experience into the dreaming and waking process? As already acknowledged, it borrowed directly from a vivid lucid dream from childhood (“The Pink Triceratops”), yet while allowing potential lucidity, I did not become lucid. Additionally, it ambiguously combined my Cubitis bedroom orientation from one time period (inclusive of 1978, where it was before my move to Wisconsin) when my bed was against the southwest corner of my room, as well as integrating the Loomis Street house’s fence (both oriented north from my dream self’s liminal perception). Even as a result of this ambiguous composite false memory, I did not become lucid, which was likely by subliminal choice due to the nature of activity in my actual environment, though outside (as RAS functions as a survival mechanism and biologically integrated environmental factors into my dream).



      Every detail of this dream has been accounted for and fully explained. Thank you for reading.


      Tags: fence
      Categories
      non-lucid
    10. February 9 2018 Transitions

      by , 02-09-2018 at 01:22 PM
      Morning of February 9, 2018. Friday.



      Today marks my 24th year in Australia and in being with the girl of my dreams, Zsuzsanna.



      I am going to try something new here. As I still have tens of thousands of dreams I have never posted online, including thousands from before I was even a teenager, I might try entries that include sequences of specific types in a series of no more than 12 for a specific part of the sleep cycle. Although I usually recall at least six longer dreams per normal sleeping time, there are many more of different but basic types that are mostly autosymbolic of the transitions between different times during sleep and of which I usually just pass through without drama. I am going to try this to see how it goes, randomly selecting dates, after this one, from over the last fifty years to see how the autosymbolic content has remained unchanged for the most part and perhaps note influences when I can. In some cases, I might include a very short summary of a dream I had already posted if it falls into the sequence of a certain dream type and time. The dreams are listed in reverse order, last one first. (Missing numbers are either related to private sections, abstract stages that cannot be described in words, or too long to post online.) (To quote the Yo-Yo man, “Try to remember everything you passed. But when you go back, make the first thing the last.”)



      12th There is one farmer working in a rice paddy. The water is lower when I look again later. (My dream self vaguely recognizes this as autosymbolism for the cessation of the dream state, water lowering waking symbolism, which has been as such since early childhood, having occurred as such through thousands of my dreams.) I do not speak to him but recognize the essence as RAS (personified preconscious). I eventually become aware that RAS has transmuted from a Filipino rice farmer into a Caucasian cowboy. He stands before a fence (my side), which is the division between dream self identity and conscious self identity, and I walk past him through an open part of the fence to wake. I do not speak to him, he nods, and I nod back. RAS mediation as utilizing a fence is less common than porches and doorways, or even parking lots, but does occur on a regular basis. RAS is typically more dominant or even aggressive when a porch is rendered as the waking space, probably because it implies that my dream self wants to remain “inside” for longer (that is, not wanting to wake yet).

      11th I am walking over a large high truss bridge (unknown location) over water. I do not see any traffic. A bridge is autosymbolism for a transition in unconsciousness and the water lowers to become the rice paddy scene of the next segment.

      08th I am walking through a circular tunnel, which I first consider, with a level of wariness, that it is the Large Hadron Collider. Still, it is mostly a featureless silver tunnel. I eventually consider it as just a transition between different levels of unconsciousness after briefly wondering if it is the inside of an airplane with no contents (including no seats or flat floor). There is sometimes a very vague sense of wariness when walking or sliding down through tunnels, not exactly claustrophobia (as I do not have this in waking life), just some sort of unusual level of awareness triggered by semi-lucidity. This is not usually the case with hallways of which are the same basic autosymbolism (dream state transition), though less transpersonal.

      05th I usually have one dream per sleeping period that is either prescient or of another inexplicable factor. I am in the backyard of our present home and there is some sort of distorted event related to five cats in a large rectangular container full of dirt of which may be a plant pot. I get the impression they are not alive, being half-buried in the dirt, but the feature seems unusual. The cats are not fully grown. There is an odd impression that they might not be “real” cats, for example, a perception of thread instead of cat hair, and an odd sort of composition, and even separated “parts” of cats (though still five in total). After waking, Zsuzsanna had shown me an older cross-stitch she had done (of which she had taken out of a rectangular plastic box this morning, with no way of me knowing that she would be doing this). There were five cats on the item, with different coats, but each of the same appearance and sequence as each from my dream, though she had related the cross-stitch as being prescient of our final number of children and the ratio of girls to boys (based on the appearance of the cat’s coat as certain coats are only common to certain sexes, such as most gingers being male and most tortoiseshells being female). This does not mean there is any symbolic connection to my dream (that is, of the cats being linked to our children), as prescience and shared dreaming is often mixed in with other factors. The symbolism still validates the prescient connection, the cats being in a rectangular box, not being “alive”, and of an unusual appearance of thread (cross-stitch thread) mixed with hair.

      02nd I mentally light a candle to see where I am (unrelated to the apnea events I experience very rarely, which is like mentally trying to will a candle flame back into existence with the fear it has gone out) and it is a small copper-walled room without much space. There is a focus on having recently taken the vocal out of David Essex’s “For Emily, Wherever I may find her”. “What a dream I had. Pressed in organdie. Clothed in crinoline…of smoky Burgundy. Softer than the rain.” Solely the isolated vocal plays from a gramophone, with an eerie echo. Sometimes when I strip the vocal out of a track in real life, it takes on a very unique quality, especially when I add certain kinds of reverb. I was thinking of using the isolated vocal in a new dub track I had already started (not for commercial purposes of course).

      00 Induction stage. I walk down steps with the intention of going deeper into the dream state. They are outdoor concrete stairs in an area near buildings of which are covered with vines. When I was very young, I learned to manipulate levels of unconsciousness by going up or down stairs in dreams (in both lucid and non-lucid situations, as I have recognized dream symbolism for so long, I was manipulating it at six years of age - which eventually became non-lucid habit), which is autosymbolism for traversing the specific level of unconsciousness (and is used the same way in hypnosis and meditation). Outdoor stairs are sometimes modeled after the ones in Veterans Memorial Campground in West Salem (Wisconsin), where I sometimes spent time as a young boy.


    11. Gate Fixing

      by , 01-11-2018 at 02:02 PM
      Evening of January 11, 2018. Thursday.



      This is from a shorter nap this evening, which is typically more vivid and with a direct awareness of what my dream is doing symbolically (especially in lucidity).



      I am lucid, though not with the conscious control factor, as I allow myself to comfortably drift in liminal space. I am in the higher liminal space, just on the threshold of vaguely perceiving my real environment, thus the symbolism is inherent to this state, which uses a common liminal space divider as the neural pattern representation, which is a wooden fence. I focus on the gate and notice the top hinge is missing (which symbolizes the event horizon of dream state cessation). I feel like sleeping a few minutes longer to sustain my dream and its vividness, so I find myself with a hammer and start nailing a small stick into the area where a hinge would otherwise go. However, this also implies that the gate might not feasibly open, at least normally. Still, my dream self vividly announces, “It might be all right.“

      Even so, my realization of the symbolism’s meaning causes a simultaneous shift, though without spontaneous muscle response (as is otherwise sometimes the case). I now become aware, in an offset dream, of a section of gate in undefined space. It is floating vertically, not attached to anything. I catch myself saying, “Steve…are you aware of what’s going on?” and wake. (This is me attempting to communicate with RAS - Reticular Activating System, of which I am directly aware I am doing in this case, which is usually passive unless I have been sleeping longer in a normal sleeping period. Calling it Steve is just a randomly retrieved thread, as I had not thought of him recently.)



      Despite symbolism in dreams being directly related to the state of sleep induction, unconsciousness, and the waking transition (which most people in the world bizarrely fail to understand at all, including so-called experts and professionals), it does sometimes incidentally borrow from recent experiences at times (even including the most emotional situation seen on television when it otherwise has no relation or connection to waking life). Yesterday, I went to borrow a wheelie bin from the house next door, which is presently vacant, and found that the gate to the back yard was not feasibly set up. It did not seem to have proper hinges and just sat there in a vertical position, held by the bolt lock. (However, my dream’s gate was only about one-third the size and wooden, not metal like the real one.)



      The name I mention is a classmate’s, who I have not seen since 1976. (I have not even seen him on Facebook.) I do not actually see him in my dream but I do have an awareness of his memory as he was at around fourteen. Still, the main memory of him relates to childhood, where he wanted to quickly borrow a set of Whitman cards I had, which had an animation (on the back of them) when all the cards were flipped, which displayed a rabbit hopping into a hat, the hat moving about, and a dove flying out. He said that if I let him use the cards for a time, he would “like me forever” (and be my friend forever). Not believing a word of what he said, I still cheerfully let him have my cards. He immediately raced to the other side of the playground to show them to a girl. The girl seemed completely unimpressed and even annoyed, and just walked away. I found the scenario very amusing, but I never reminded him of it in all the time we were in school.


      Categories
      lucid
    12. Another Imposer and Doorway Waking Symbolism Dream

      by , 08-18-2017 at 05:42 PM
      Morning of August 18, 2017. Friday.



      I seem to be in bed with Zsuzsanna. However, our bed seems to be in the backyard of our present home with our heads oriented south (with the same left and right orientation as we are sleeping in reality). It is full daylight out. Still, there is an odd sense of bilocation of which is not defined in the usual way.

      A boy of about ten years old comes into our backyard a few times from our neighbor’s backyard. He is unknown and unfamiliar, though implied to be the neighbor’s son (though this “neighbor” is also an unknown character). I display a bit of anger and aggression and he goes back each time, somehow going over the fence, though it seems somewhat like the old metal fence that was not very high. He has a somewhat condescending nature.

      My awareness shifts and my dream changes orientation. Now our bed is in the Loomis Street living room, our heads west, opposite the front entrance. Once again, the boy is imposing by coming in through the front door, which may have been left open. I do not express much anger.

      His father, an unknown chubby male of about thirty and with red hair, also comes in through the door as if he had been uncertain as to where his son had gotten off to. I nod and I do not express any anger at the imposition of either, almost as if their ridiculous intrusions do not matter at this point. The other man seems friendly and calm.



      Nothing relevant to waking life (on a personal level) is to be found here; just the usual dreaming and waking symbolism, here rendered as doorway waking symbolism, though in many cases, a distorted rendering of the emergent consciousness, mixed in with dynamics of the preconscious (sometimes as a “monster”) remains within a doorway rather than viably using a door or doorway.

      I can only guess that these two unknown characters were related to unconsciously perceiving (remote viewing) random unknown people in the area as I was sleeping, the boy linked into the transpersonal stream via the preconscious while his father linked to the emergent consciousness, a dynamic that has often occurred in past dreams. The fence is a clue, as a fence symbolizes a division in levels of consciousness within the dream state and of course our being in bed is simply an indicator of being in the dream state.

      It has remained obvious through tens of thousands of dreams for over fifty years, that the transpersonal preconscious stream integrates found personas that are the least like the conscious self identity, for that is the only real way, excluding willing coalescence, that the dream self attains enough emotion (through aggravation, conflict, or other emotions) to come out of the dream state under many conditions. Otherwise, the “ripples” of neural energy are unlikely to increase and the dreamer would remain in the dream. Waking and waking prompts are a biological necessity, yet most of humanity does not even come close to grasping the simplest concepts concerning dreams or their purpose or meaning.


      Categories
      non-lucid
    13. Walls within Walls and Beyond Walls

      by , 05-09-2017 at 02:51 PM
      Morning of May 9, 2017. Tuesday.



      I am in a setting which seems to be modeled somewhat after the Loomis Street backyard, though there is the typical ambiguous feeling of being indoors and outdoors at the same time. The north fence is present but higher than in real life. There are a few unknown people present.

      I am aware of a set of parallel walls. There are at least five or six in a row and only about four feet apart. The first wall, farther south from the real fence, is made of old stones. A couple walls are more like the inside of a house.

      There is some sort of sense of wanting to explore. The main scene involves an unknown male opening a door between two walls, and this event is somehow duplicated simultaneously between two different walls, and yet it is also the same man. I believe this is the first time this has occurred in a dream.


      Tags: door, fence, stones, walls
      Categories
      non-lucid
    14. A Fist Fight with a Fictitious Neighbor

      by , 12-12-2015 at 06:12 PM
      Morning of December 12, 2015. Saturday.

      Dream #: 17,890-02. Reading time: 1 min 56 sec.



      In my dream, my wife Zsuzsanna and our children and I are living in an unfamiliar residence. It is uncertain whether it is the front yard or backyard where the events occur. There is a big shed to my right (from the perspective of the doorway), so it may be our backyard. Two of our sons are playing.

      I notice our neighbor (an unfamiliar dream character about my age, but I seem to be younger) is cutting down one of our big trees from his side of the fence (my left), slightly above its height, closest the alley or street. (I should assume alley as it is probably the backyard.) It puzzles and angers me because trees provide shade and keep the yard cooler. I start yelling about it from our doorway though there is no reason why he would hear me due to the noise of his chainsaw. The tree falls into his yard. For a moment, I wonder if he had misjudged what he was doing and was struck by it, but that is not the case.

      He goes on to cut down an additional tree of ours that is slightly smaller and closer to our house. I cannot believe his audacity. However, I consider that our trees may have possibly caused problems by their roots being problematic, perhaps relating to issues with the fence itself or something on his property.

      I tell Zsuzsanna about it. The room is unfamiliar, and another door to the backyard is present though open. Our neighbor, who does not look like anyone I know, walks into our house with an angry look. I assume this is because he heard me yelling at him.

      “You have no business just waltzing into our house,” I say sternly and assertively. Another unknown male also comes into our house. He is younger, perhaps in his late thirties. He may be a man who was also in our neighbor’s yard and helping him.

      I walk over to him and punch him hard in the jaw, followed by another punch in the nose. He does not move back but sways slightly. He does not attempt to strike me. Much to my surprise, the other male also starts punching him from his left. I continue to hit him from his right. The other male punches him hard in the stomach a few times. I grab the bar (no weights) of a dumbbell to swing and hit him directly in the jaw again, three times. He almost falls. The other male does not look at me and continues to fight him. For a moment, I think the other man may think my usage of the metal bar is “unfair,” but he never speaks or stops punching the older male. I wake while wondering if the older man angered the younger man by trespassing into our house or otherwise annoying him.



      dream type: subliminal preconscious wall mediation


      Categories
      non-lucid
    15. Watching Dinosaurs and Playing Around With My Own Skeleton

      by , 10-10-2015 at 11:39 AM
      Morning of October 10, 2015. Saturday.



      This is a set of three shorter dreams in which one shifted into the other with only partial wakefulness.

      The first involves being at an unknown location near a river bank. My wife Zsuzsanna and I are watching alligators swim through the water every now and then, just under the surface. A few other people are walking around. The alligators do not really seem threatening. Eventually I notice how a few of them look very different from normal alligators, though mostly around the head. I point out that it seems someone is apparently doing strange experiments with dinosaur DNA or possibly even living dinosaurs and alligators, as each alligator seems to have minor features from a known dinosaur, one having a head somewhat like a Tyrannosaurus, the other like a Styracosaurus, though flatter and more alligator-like. I even manage to pull the Styracosaurus alligator out of the water and partly onto the bank so that I can show people what I mean.

      After a partial awakening and back into sleep, my wife and children and I are back on Barolin Street, except that all of the houses north of ours (as in reality) are gone and the area is replaced by a large field of mostly short grass and which is bordered by a fence adjacent to the sidewalk. Only a few other people are around farther to the north.

      An unnaturally large Tyrannosaurus, probably about twice as large as any real one ever was, is walking about in the field as if being kept there by the small fence, which is only about the height of an average human waist. I see another Tyrannosaurus nearby, about three lots beyond the first one. In the back of my mind, I sense a part of myself contemplating how I will change my dream from an uneventful one into one where we are chased by the dinosaurs. (This vague awareness of making my dream in real time which also occurs with clearer awareness in indescribable abstract dreams has occurred since early childhood, though there is no hint of lucidity otherwise.)

      The Tyrannosaurus moves his head down, leaning forward, and smashes down the tiny fence with his head, as if the tiny fence was somehow keeping him in the field when all he needed to do was just step over it without even noticing. I find this scene somewhat comedic, pondering the seeming low intelligence of the creature. I tell everyone that we need to go back to our house, as the dinosaur is now loose. It is soon moving very fast in our direction though the other one seems to be considering which direction to go (as there are more unknown people to the north). We go onto our porch, though the door to the main entrance and hallway is locked. From here, I non-lucidly manipulate my dream by rewinding it, pausing it, and jumping about in terms of sections of previous events.

      In my next dream, we are inside the Barolin Street house, in the living room, I think. I am near the center of the room sitting on the floor. For some reason, I am practicing my firing of projectiles, which are actually finger bones from my hand. I somehow pop them out from my skeletal hand and fire them across the room (with a force that carries them to the wall, a few hitting a desk). I do this at least twelve times with all twelve of the phalanges of my right hand (not counting my thumb). I somehow continue with my left hand (not realizing it would not be possible as my right fingers are all gone). Looking down at my own skeleton, I see that I must have also already used some of my ribs at an earlier date. It is no problem, as I will eventually probably snap all my bones back into place later on.

      (This may have something to do with the difficulty we had in snapping together the life-sized Billy Bones model kit a few months ago.)
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