memorable

2 minute 28 second read.



White Crustaceans

From Friday, 31 December 2021

Dream #: 20,101-04 (Last dream of last morning of 2021)

In an unknown location, I climb the side of a mountain in daylight with little effort. The view is beautiful as I see valleys and gorges under a blue sky.

After ascending a slope (and “walking with intent”), I arrive on flat ground and see small white crabs walking several inches apart in a line (as if marching with a human-like essence). I am unwary as the scene begins to seem silly.

A former Nazi concentration camp appears in an illogical elevated location on the other side of a barbed-wire fence. It seems abandoned. Areas between the groups of equidistant buildings are illogically too narrow.

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Lobsterpocalypse (Re-titled)

From Friday, 3 November 1972

Dream #: 2,146-09

Small white lobsters threaten human civilization, but my dream mainly implies people have to secure their homes and not go outside for a year or two. The area is undefined except for an unfamiliar library, a vacant field, a deep narrow gorge, and distant mountains.

The library is the only building in the narrative. I do not otherwise see evidence of a town. My dream self perceives the location as being in Florida, even though Florida does not have such landmarks as high mountains and deep gorges.

I explore the vacant field. Here and there, I see circular holes in the ground as if made for a barbecue. Piles of small white lobsters fill most of the shallow recesses. I am uncertain if they are alive. Someone might have cooked them. There is a vague feeling of nausea, but not predominant.

Tina L_____ (a girl from my school about my age) is at the unrecognized public library where I am. There is an implied fear at times, but it feels like we are pretending as I also perceive my dream’s narrative as a movie in progress. She pretends to have an Australian or British accent at times.

A few small white lobsters emerge from between books on the shelves. Most are at about chest level.

We need to leave the library and escape from the region because more will supposedly arrive. No one expresses any concern. They remain seated at tables or look for books on the shelves.

We will be “safer than anyone else” by taking a particular route. However, as we quickly walk easterly over the vacant field, our progress is halted by a deep narrow gorge. I see a raging river far below, but only barely visible because of the depth. Concern fades at this point as I choose to wake myself.

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My dream narratives primarily develop from familiar physiological causality but often include choices on what my dreaming experience will feature, with or without what people claim is “lucidity.”

Crabs and lobsters typically imply associations with my somatosensory phasing response to REM atonia when navigating the illusions of dreaming. The circumstances vary, from intuitively knowing I cannot maneuver my fingers (or toes) while sleeping (associations with a crustacean claw) to anticipated sensations relating to my hands. Coins occur far more often during this process (as I often intuitively summon them to vivify and sustain a dream), but an animal nibbling my fingers may also occur when protoconsciousness is predominant.

Vestibular-motor sensations are the predominant factor of causality, including flying (every sleep cycle since before I could read or write), slope navigation, navigating elevated spaces - and seeing a gorge or illogically low-set feature (such as a street far below a curb).

Both REM atonia (natural paralysis while sleeping), “drop anticipation” (with or without REM myoclonus), and the feeling my dream is ending influence narratives and outcomes.

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Morning of February 9, 1971. Tuesday.

Dream #: 1,513-02. Reading time (optimized): 1 min.



I am at West Elementary School in Arcadia and walking to the building from the playground. I see lightning inside the main school building in the western area when looking north. Although it is a sunny morning, it is dark and stormy inside the classroom, though I do not see any of my schoolmates or teachers, only what appears to be a crude version of Doctor Frankenstein’s laboratory.

Later, I am sitting in a taxi in the back seat on the left-hand side. The driver turns around and reveals himself to be Frankenstein’s monster. His name is Frank N. Stein, which I read on a card above the steering wheel, to its left. Nothing frightening happens. It seems more like a puzzling comedic event. The narrative is ambiguous, as even though I am getting a taxi home, the school day has not started yet.

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Now I ask for reasonable intelligence to understand how to decode this dream. Frankenstein’s monster awakened by way of electricity that could also be analogous to neuronal energy. It represents my own waking process and nothing more. The ambiguity of the narrative also correlates with the realization that I am not starting the school day because I am asleep.

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My dream’s influence was probably from Shock Armstrong, the late-night television horror host of “Shock Theatre” from Channel 13 in Tampa, Florida (from 1964-1968). (There was a similar scenario I saw in a humor magazine later in my life; a gag about the ID not looking like the driver).

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Afternoon of May 24, 2020. Sunday.

Reading time (optimized): 4 min.



Fire, lightning, electricity, wiring, circuits, lasers, candles, lightbulbs, flashlights, headlights, sunbeams, and the sun are fundamental characteristic features of the cortical arousal of the waking process and represent the increase of neuronal energy and the emergence of consciousness for anyone who legitimately understands the dream state.

Although the same transitions occur every sleep cycle, they stabilize with uniqueness in vivid liminal sleep-wake management. Here, I will include the modulatory factor in the upper case, a description of the relevant dream content, and the ultradian implication (with virtual or literal melatonin or serotonin mediation). My goal is to find correlations I had not previously noticed (to develop more clarity of mind, though, as there are more than 20,000 examples of this form of dream state management, it is not feasible to include more variables at this time. I may study them in pairs of variables at a later date, though I have found all major statistical curves and causal factors for most dream content over 50 years.)

Before I describe the many unique and intriguing versions of this process, I will begin with including my lifelong activity of pulling myself out of undefined liminal space (that has no imagery and seems integrated with enigmatic space) by summoning an unseen candle, perceiving my emerging consciousness as a candle flame. When this happens as a result of sleep apnea (though which is rare), and no vestibular-cerebral handshake (viable body-mind agreement), it is the only type of dreaming experience where I feel genuine fear. Variations of it are rare. One variation occurred in December of 1969. In addition to sustaining my consciousness as the essence of a candle flame, I also absentmindedly summoned an unseen dragon that roared and breathed fire. (Undefined liminal space never contains imagery. Also, the duality as a result of being between dreaming space and waking space is far less in this state. That is likely what causes a sense of dread.)

19690519. FIRE. Toby and I rescue Brenda from her burning house, though it is erroneously on the school grounds. Dark, before dawn. (Includes audio near the waking point: “You boys are wonderful!”)

19710209. LIGHTNING. Frankenstein’s monster is the driver of a taxi I get into (though I do not notice until I am sitting in it in the back seat, left side). I see lightning flashing only inside the school in the early morning on a clear day. There is a sense of amusement rather than a threat. As a school is associated with learning, the lightning represents potential wakefulness and is analogous to the monster rising from his bed. The taxi is analogous with my physical body, of which I do not yet have control, as I am asleep in reality. Otherwise, summoning vehicles as I often do, is more about increasing my imaginary physicality to enhance and sustain the dream state.

19710516. LIGHTNING and FIRE. A bolt of lightning comes down and strikes a church belfry in the distance, setting it afire, while I am on the otherwise empty school grounds with my mother. Dark, before dawn. (Includes audio: I say, "It’s not my fault” to my mother.) It is essentially a visual and visually exaggerated version of the candle-lighting process.

19740127. SPARKS and FIRE. I am at my middle school with my GI Joe jeep, though it is erroneously a remote control toy (confused with my remote control orange Volkswagon). Low lighting in the cafeteria. At first, I seem to be operating it, but the narrative changes. Sparks and fire begin near the gas pedal when it stops, but it does not spread. A moving vehicle (analogous to the body) typically represents the anticipation of a vestibular-cerebral handshake, and I often summon vehicles in all modes of dreaming. The fire near the gas pedal anticipates atonia to myoclonus, which is often a spontaneous leg kick with waking.

19791106. FIRE. In a parking lot (management of liminality during an absent vestibular-cerebral handshake), I see a car erupt into flames as its unknown owner enters it (though I feel no emotion or sense of dread). Curiously, as a result, the car reveals what looks like an oversized human ribcage that had been its top and sides. Nighttime, low light. It is a direct validation that a vehicle is analogous to the human body.

19820905. ANTHROPOMORPHIC LIGHTNING (ELECTRICITY). Early morning setting. An imp, about a foot tall, lives inside the kitchen cabinet under the sink. He seems to be made of electricity, though he maintains a sketchy human form and monitors the plumbing (seemingly with the pipe missing). Although he seems mischievous, I do not feel threatened. Later, I see Earl in the back of a car in a parking lot (liminal space management). He is instead the disabled man from a real advertisement in which he had said, “I’m a little tired. I’m alright though,” when rising from the water in an Olympic-size pool. It ties in with how the “electric imp” was a simulacrum of melatonin mediation. (The clue is the statement “I’m a little tired,” though unspoken in the dream, meaning I am sleeping, as water signifies the dream state’s dynamics.)

19901209 FIRE. I see the front-left heating element on the stove catch fire for no discernible reason in the otherwise dark Loomis Street kitchen. I feel no sense of threat. (Audio: An unknown girl exclaims “Fire!”) This variation of the candle flame summoning has an association with the area underneath the stove element as a virtual portal deeper into dream space.

20160222. CANDLE FLAME. I summon a giant candle to undo the magic of a male cult leader. (Audio: “…and now a golden candle, taller than me, appears here.”) (My dream was extremely long with a complex narrative.)

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I include these detailed explanatory factors with each relevant series about my fundamental dreaming habits and their inherent dream-based meanings, so I can remove the more extensive redundancies from past entries (on my two main online dream journals), and keep this introductory page as a public reference for future entries.

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Friday, 18 October 2019

Reading time: 3 min 20 sec.



Here, I will explain the essential decoding of entries that will eventually include “bird resurrection” in the title. The original entries will remain in my online journal.

Something coming to life, reviving, or waking from sleep in the last part of a dream is simply the subliminal, liminal, or supraliminal anticipatory autosymbolism of waking up, the preconscious precursor of gaining control of the physical body and the emergence of consciousness and valid personal identity. That is what most final dream segments include (more so with instinctual and lucid modulation), though with an infinite variety of content. Ultimately, the most common indicator of this process for me is a bird of any number of species from dream to dream.

The foundation of this process has occurred every sleep cycle since early childhood, though I have only thus far included some of the more interesting dreaming experiences online.

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Qebehsenuef Canopic Jar (October 18, 2019). A mummified parrot in an Egyptian falcon canopic jar (Qebehsenuef) comes to life, and the bird vibrates in my hands with pleasing sensations.

The most recent mental activity before this had been in slow-wave sleep (virtual mummification). I am lucidly modulating liminal space (anticipating the drop, but it does not occur). I had intestinal pain before (and during) sleep. (A Qebehsenuef canopic jar holds the intestines.) Note that any container typically represents how the dream self cannot arouse the physical body until consciousness emergence.

Decayed Fence and Strange Weather (July 7, 2015). At the end of this dream, Ava Gardner is in a lacey black dress. She is on the floor near a couch on her elbows, with her knees up. As I grab her heels, she transforms into a Tweety Bird foil balloon of about three feet in length. I strike it against the floor while holding the bottom edge, but it remains as it is. (It was similar to “Unconvincing Resurrection” from October 18, 2016, when I tried to resurrect a dream character from his skull in a bucket of water, but out came a novelty balloon with a skeleton print.)

That dream segment (the last part of a much longer dream) is probably more ridiculous than most other examples. Balloons and birds both correlate with drop anticipation, though balloons additionally relate to a subliminal, liminal, or supraliminal focus on breathing while sleeping.

One Quail into Three (September 26, 2014). There is a tall thin paper sack with a rectangular bottom that contains a sickly quail on its side. There is a vivid vibration as I hold the paper bag. Eventually, there are inexplicably three quail in it, two healthy, one sickly. Zsuzsanna is about to sell the sack of quail to an unknown woman who arrives at our door (lesser wall mediation with doorway waking autosymbolism). I wake as she talks to her.

That dream indicates the same process and with the same modulation as the first example, though instinctually rather than lucidly. However, enigmatic space (not a dreaming process) also became a factor here. Years later, in real life, our oldest daughter took an interest in raising quail (with Zsuzsanna helping her). When selling a few in town, the buyer complained about one of them being unhealthy, though it was not; it only had one feather out of place. Thus, my dream’s scenario was also literal, but years before real-life correlation. (One quail of a small hatching as here died in another instance.)

Baby Bird (May 4, 2014). We have a baby bird (possibly a wild finch) that fell out of its nest and is living inside my makeshift terrarium outside. It is weak and sickly, seemingly injured. By feeding it small pieces of rubber cut from a bicycle inner tube, it grows and becomes healthier in a short time. Later, after feeding it potato chips, it ceases to exist.

That dream might seem bizarre to people who do not understand the co-occurrence of dreaming and waking processes. Bicycles are a more grounded form of vestibular correlation anticipation than flight is (with less expectation of the drop), so this is instinctual modulation to correlate emerging physical preparedness as much dream content is. Next, come potato chips. As they crumble easily, I associate them with the dream state losing cohesion (and the bird and anticipatory factors dissipate as a result).

The Hummingbird Power (January 2, 2007). In this dream, a hummingbird had gotten into our house, and I do not want it to become weak over time or injure itself. Holding it creates an extreme sense of compressed weight as well as pleasing powerful vibrations. Although it seems to have gotten squashed when I absentmindedly close our front door, it seems invulnerable and flies back into our house for a time.

Ceramic Chicken (from 1963) is one of my oldest validated dreams from before I could write. A statue coming to life is the anticipation of waking (cortical arousal).

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Hopefully, this entry should serve as a partial foundation for idiot-proofing my online dream journal when it comes to this type of content.

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Morning of October 5, 2018. Friday.

Dream #: 18,918-01. Reading time: 2 min 51 sec. Readability score: 54.



My conscious self as in waking life experiences its annihilation in the non-lucid dream state, and as my subconscious self, I lose viable memory of who I am and the contact with my unconscious mind that I possess in waking life. All that remains within my temporary dream self’s fictitious mind is the subliminal awareness of being in the dream state, and the essence of non-lucid dream control and its dynamics gathered from a lifetime of knowledge of the dream state.

Wanting to liminally return my incomplete dream self essence to at least partial coalescence with my conscious self, I create a school setting to metaphorically learn my way back to my conscious identity to pull myself at least partially out of the illusory dream state into the liminal pre-wakefulness range of a more realistic self-awareness and mode of discernment. The teacher is an unknown female standing near the center of the classroom of which is mostly featureless. I am in the room near the doorway, to its left when facing it. All of the other students (unfamiliar), male and female, several adults and children of different ages, are outside the classroom, in the hall. They are all unsure if they want to enter the classroom but are listening to the teacher. The class is just beginning, so they have time to consider their choices.

I am sitting on the wooden floor with my legs out, with the bottoms of my feet facing the doorway. All that I am wearing is a white t-shirt. I do not feel embarrassed. After all, I am in a dream and not wearing clothes as I sleep in a bed, even if that understanding is only subliminal. (Even as a child, I knew my transient fictitious dream self was not my conscious self as in reality. That may be why I have rarely ever had “bad” dreams other than when biologically premonitory.)

My illusory erroneous “I am” adjusts to the scenario. I am not lucid or holding any essence of my current conscious self identity, but being near the doorway is a factor of liminal emerging consciousness. The preconscious avatar awakens and comes into existence to my left, still malleable and passive. I allow the five youngest denizens (from a prior unification star ritual in a previous lucid dream) to cheerfully enter the classroom and continue behind me to begin their studies. I do not recall the purpose of the lucid ritual in my non-lucidity.

I decide to converse with the preconscious avatar, an unfamiliar male of about thirty in this incarnation, liminally attempting to transform him into a potential dream state reinducer. On the right side of my right foot is a tattoo of a big golden wind-up key. In reality, this side of my body is exposed to my real environment (as I sleep on my left side). Yellow is the color of potentially viable consciousness within the dream state. That is the link to my true self, to my conscious self identity as in waking life, and the potential for my conscious self identity to manifest within my dream self. This wind-up key is autosymbolism (and a liminal reminder that my dream self’s physicality is not real) for beginning the transition of my true conscious self into my fictitious non-lucid dream self so that my conscious will can more viably maintain the simulacrum and perhaps sustain the dream state for a time.

The avatar marvels at my tattoo, and that amuses me.

My precursory lucidity holds his attention, though he does not attempt to dominate the process.

“I got this when I was in New York,” I deliberately lie, though as it is a dream, it could very well become the “real” backstory should my dream last for several more minutes. “The tattoo artist was a man named Gabriel Vartez.” I pull this name out of nowhere. “Vartez” has no familiarity though “Gabrielle” is Zsuzsanna’s middle name (though my dream self still does not viably remember my current conscious self status here). I am describing this fictitious event to him as if it were a significant encounter.

“That’s interesting,” he responds with admiration, “Gary Vartez?”

This erroneous response annoys me, but I do not say anything or indicate my annoyance. Instead, I choose to wake peacefully.

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Morning of September 18, 2018. Tuesday.

Reading time: 2 min 52 sec. Readability score: 70.



Still aware of where my physical body is as I sleep, my illusory dream body rises and floats into our lounge room. I remember to focus on our porch for liminal space vivification (enhancement and sharpening of the midpoint between dreaming and waking). However, when I get to the entrance of the lounge room, there is no porch. My dream self is now implied to be corporeal but has distorted physicality. My legs are not viable, so I both fall and partly hover over the stairs, yet I do not wake. I get the impression of another physical form hovering above the ground, of which I bump. It seems to be an unfamiliar male, not very well defined. He is soon gone.

My dream is extraordinarily vivid but does not shift to the highest level of lucidity. The neighborhood is of a different appearance. Directly across the street to the north are more houses. On the west side of the intersection, I see a flaming man on a flaming motorcycle of which is traveling quite slowly. He is going south. The imagery is eerie but wondrous. I feel a sense of otherworldly awe. The fire is beautiful and increases my awareness of the dream state.

I anticipate his approach, as I think he will turn around and come back. He does, but eventually, the fire goes out, and he is walking with his motorcycle on my side of the street. As he is walking to the north side of the intersection, I boldly call out, “You’re Johnny Blaze.” He seems puzzled, and crosses back to my side of the street, approaching me. He is wearing a blue motorcycle racing jumpsuit with white stripes down the sides.

He stands close to me to become Ghost Rider again. I realize he will be able to look deep into my soul and know all there is to know about me. The experience is incredible. It is as if the universe itself is looking into all areas of my existence and personal history. He is a man again, though his eyes are glowing with eternity, infinity, and universality. I notice that flakes of my skin seem to be falling away from the scar on my right thumb, as I look down at it. There is no pain or implied threat.

Instead of any potential threat, he starts whimpering in appreciation of the life I have lived up to now. He hugs me and seems like a new friend. From here, my level of awareness shifts. I become less lucid as my dream changes into a different form, though the Johnny Blaze character is still present.

My mother is present, but I do not recall that she had died years ago. She asks me what is going on. I say, “I knew it was a dream, so I went from there,” regarding my description of falling out the door into a vivified scenario. That is very odd though, as I am no longer lucid (yet saying “I knew it was a dream.”)

As the waking transition starts, Johnny Blaze is no longer carrying the interconsciousness within the rendering. Still, I say, “Watch this,” only loosely expecting Ghost Rider to appear one final time.

Instead, a wall, like that inside a house, intersects the street, and a door appears in it. There is the common indoor-outdoor ambiguity (the sense of being inside and outside at the same time). Some other dream characters, including my mother, Zsuzsanna, and me, go over to the doorway. Beyond it from our side, we see that Johnny had crashed into a row of wheelie bins and fallen over, though I realize he is not the same character as before, as the interconsciousness had left the dream state right after hugging me (in temporary coalescence and unification). He is on the ground, mostly on his back and turned a bit to the left, looking somewhat surprised and annoyed. I wake quickly from here, finding myself in the same physical position as Johnny had been.

I should point out that I had held no thoughts of Ghost Rider, either the comic book or movie for a long time. Johnny Blaze was nothing like Nicolas Cage (or any other known actor) in my dream. He was an unfamiliar man of a more athletic build.

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Morning of August 19, 2018. Sunday.

Reading time: 1 min 21 sec. Readability score: 49.



In my dream, my family and I as we appear now are living back on Barolin Street (though the house is no longer there in reality and our youngest daughter never lived there). It seems to be late morning. She is looking out into the front yard.

A white plastic bucket (contents unknown, if any) rises from the ground in about the center of the front yard and hovers in the air to about five feet and floats slowly from north to south. The scene resets and repeats several times. I think that an invisible whirlwind is causing it. It does not pose a threat, and my daughter sees it as a joyful event.

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It is not a tornado dream, but it is a basis for the ultradian rhythm process (in addition to VSC). Tornadoes stem from a specific type of vestibular system correlation at the peak of ultradian rhythm. Even so, I have often controlled their manifestation and direction in both non-lucidity and lucidity.

Here, my infra-awareness (with non-lucid dream control) mediates the event as being cheerful and soft. It represents ultradian rhythm being less dominant in the projected contemplation of my illusory fictitious dream body, also affected by the level of natural melatonin. The white bucket likely represents a specific measurement of it. From a biological standpoint, water and how it occurs in dreams is autosymbolism for the level and dynamics of sleep and levels of melatonin. I have “water symbolizing sleep” as appearing 350 times in my main online journal (though water induction/melatonin begins all sleep cycles). As I have written often, dream “symbolism” is not symbolism in the conventional sense, as it is not even viable in non-lucidity despite popular misconception.

The association, although I never take medication as such, probably stems from the following extract: “When it’s nighttime and melatonin levels are high,” says Dr. Wurtman, “taking melatonin supplements is like putting a drop of water into an empty bucket; when it’s daytime, it’s like putting a drop of water into a full bucket.”

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Morning of October 20, 2016. Thursday.



My dream begins with a backstory involving a task which is apparently for a reality show. There is a feeling of comfort and happiness and of being in the right place at the right time.

The challenge involves retrieving a two-storey dollhouse from the middle of a shallow pond. The knee-deep water is very cool and refreshing. The dollhouse is in a deeper area, mostly encircled by rocks that are just under the surface. Reaching down to lift it from the bottom, my right hand brushes a rock and I get an intense electrical shock that jolts my whole body and I even feel residual buzzing for a short time. My perception vivifies after this. I realize that only the dollhouse can be touched with the hands or a shock will result, which seems to be the nature of the challenge. I grab it by the roof and an upper window with both hands and get a vague impression that it is actually a miniature boathouse made of flimsy wood. I lift it up and tip it and watch and hear all the water flow out, as if it had been full of water even though much of it had been above the surface. I carry it back to shore with a great sense of enjoyment.

There is a later scene in a less vivid dream event where two unknown males are trying to win the hand of a tribal princess. (I am unsure of the culture as even though it seems early Native American, it also seems to be in the future where there have been celestial changes, possibly threatening, though this is not a dominant idea.) There is something about shooting an arrow between two bows that overlap front to front giving the impression of a Venn diagram truncated at each side, the central area symbolically relating to the traits of the princess that both men desire, which has obvious sexual undertones.

In the last segment, which is more vivid, an unknown male in a business suit is boarding a passenger jet near the outer boundary of a forest. (My view of him is from behind the left side of the aircraft.) He is carrying a large golden airplane charm which he had apparently won. He seems happy as he is walking up the mobile stairs.

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About 12% of my dreams (about 12 out of 100) render water as autosymbolism that represents entry into the dream state.

About 23% of my dreams (about 23 out of 100) render vestibular system ambiguity as a flight symbol. In this case, vestibular system symbolism (autosymbolism that signifies being unconscious and emerging from the dream state) has three layers; the passenger jet, the golden airplane charm, and the mobile stairs. Gold symbolizes the emergent consciousness as analogous to increasing daylight.

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Text last optimized Saturday, 3 February 2018.

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Morning of August 25, 2017. Friday.



In the first part of my dream, I am mostly in the background (as a secondary character) watching high school students being questioned about drug usage and something to do with playing sports at times when sports are apparently not allowed (or at least relating to how the games are played), though this factor may be distorted as I am not focused on every detail. Apparently, every student in the school is being punished based on the actions and beliefs of only about four students. The events and interview scenes (which sometimes include two or three students) are not that vivid. The most vivid part is in the last segment of my dream, which in actuality is an offset dream that initiates the waking symbolism and also has the perspective of semi-lucidity.

I am in a mostly featureless room. It begins to have the essence of higher liminal space (closer to waking consciousness). An unusual version of Johnny Whitaker, the actor from “Family Affair”, walks into the room. It seems he is going to be either in an interview or some sort of publicity, perhaps even an acting role. (This is not certain.)

I recognize him as a celebrity. I call out “Jody!” He smiles and nods but does not move from his location near the doorway.

I am puzzled by his lack of initiation from my side, due to very vivid memories seemingly being present, but not quite within reach. “Jody!” I yell again.

His expression changes as if he suddenly gets it. “Buffy!” he yells and runs up to me as we hug. He then steps aside and speaks three phrases that sound like gibberish with a “sudsy” essence (as if gargling and speaking at the same time). However, he then clearly says “How are you?” and nods happily as I wake.

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Although this dream was typical coalescence waking symbolism (fairly common for me since childhood), there are some very eerie underlying layers, especially when looking at recent trends in my dreaming patterns.

Consider that I have not seen the episode of “Family Affair” that this dream is directly associated with since I was very young. Also, I have not actively thought of Johnny Whitaker or Anissa Jones as in “Family Affair” in many years. Anissa Jones died on August 28, 1976, three days from today’s date. Johnny Whitaker was born December 13, 1959, so is close to my age (though I was born on December 20, 1960).

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As a supplement, I will add details from three recent dreams that utilized coalescence waking symbolism:

“Socket Repair and my Mother and Classmates” of August 19, 2017. (Preconscious as former schoolmate Sam M and recognized as such).

“Fixing a Bridge (featuring Dean Norris)” of August 24, 2017. (Preconscious as actor Dean Norris, unrecognized as a celebrity.)

“Meeting Johnny Whitaker (coalescence waking symbolism)”, this dream entry’s dream, of August 25, 2017 (Preconscious as actor Johnny Whitaker, recognized as such.)

What is interesting is the one with Sam M, where I absentmindedly (and accidentally) punched him in the face, thinking he was a different former classmate. He then gives medical attention to my other arm (which in real life was cramping up as I slept.) The vividness of this dream was equal to the other two. It also turned out to have prescient threads (as most of my dreams do, but I do not always update them as such). In this case, with no way of me expecting it, he had posted a joke on Facebook within about a day after my dream. It was about a professor asking God directly for “proof of God” and ended with a soldier getting up and punching him, saying that God was busy protecting soldiers so he was sent. There is much more, but this entry is long enough.

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Morning of August 20, 2017. Sunday.



I am in the middle room on the east side of the King Street mansion (where I have not been in real life in over twenty years). It is not known if I am living there though, as there is an unknown male in the bed, which is out from the east wall. It seems to be late at night.

I am aware of a supposed haunting, but there is no concern or fear of any kind. In fact, I make sarcastic remarks to the unseen ghost and screech several times. After time passes, the unseen ghost screeches louder than me. The unknown male and I are somewhat amused.

Still, I am trying to get the ghost to show itself. The room has a fictional feature. There is a closet to the left of the door, but this feature would not be possible in real life as there is a hall directly behind that wall. At one point, the landlady looks in to see what is going on.

There are two small wooden shelves near the top of the closet. The ghost seems to be on the top shelf. I see signs of it a few times, but just a little.

Two unknown girls come into the room. One reminds me of Linda Cardellini as Velma from 2002’s “Scooby-Doo” and the other, Annie Potts as Janine Melnitz from 1984’s “Ghostbusters”. Both are to my left, Linda being closer.

I tell them to watch as I bring the ghost out from hiding by commanding it to appear. On the left of the upper closet shelf, a small circle of white material appears. Time passes, and the “ghost” emerges. It looks like a series of small balls covered with a handkerchief as it moves down to the bottom shelf and moves to the right somewhat like a caterpillar in a sort of undulating motion.

Linda makes a comment about it possibly being a “flaw in the film” as if we were watching a movie instead of a real feature in the room. My dream fades from this point.

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Zsuzsanna and I watched “Ghosts of Darkness” (2017) last night, where a main scene involved two men watching a door to a closet and attempting to expel a large demon from an old mansion. This enjoyable comedic dream is all that resulted. There have been a number of other dreams where dream characters talked about dreams or features or events in a dream as if they were movies. I find this very interesting, as it may be a thread of my conscious self expressing this major sentiment about dreams through another dream character, especially as it is usually said near the end of a dream. A movie theater or stage has also been a subliminal dream-state indicator in a number of my dreams.

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Morning of August 1, 2017. Tuesday.

Dream #: 18,488-02. Reading Time (optimized): 2 min.



I am with several people on an unusual little island at night. I walk around in a paved area. A small canal divides most of the island about one-quarter in from the side opposite of where I stand. There is at least one big brick building that blocks my view of the ocean on my right.

Zsuzsanna and our youngest son are eventually with me. We go over to the canal. I notice that the ocean on the opposite side of the island, which I can now clearly see, has whitecaps (though I do not focus as much on the waves on my left side). An unknown girl talks about it publicly, relaying a concern that makes me consider if the waves could eventually cover the island. The island’s isolation contributes to this concern but not for long.

I look into the depths of the canal and see a shadowy shape that I soon see is a shark of about four feet long. I tell Zsuzsanna and our son to watch, and we cheerfully look into the water. I soon notice other small sharks as well as a little dolphin, which is surprising, as they do not fight. They do not look real and make me think indirectly of CGI. We share amusement in watching these creatures in addition to several tiny fish. The more active area of the ocean remains off to my right, behind the big building, but some of it is still visible through the end of the canal and surrounding area.

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Zsuzsanna remains on my left, correlating with our sleeping positions. Additionally, this is one of many dreams that lack definition or attention to my left in contrast to a clear focus to my right, which is subliminal wakefulness anticipation (as I sleep on my left side, my right more exposed to my environment correlating in the dream state with its concurrent monitoring).

For over 50 years, water has been a consistent factor of natural melatonin mediation and ultradian and circadian rhythm in correlation with my sleep cycle. The unknown girl is a subliminal reminder of the Naiad factor from high-level dream state induction, though here has transitioned to the RAS (reticular activating system) mediation stage. She is “warning” me about the high waves, a warning about not sleeping too long, the island being the dream state.

I was aware that I was at least partly responsible for creating the ocean creatures, but with no dream state realization. The eradication of the unintelligent hype equating lucid dreaming with dream control is necessary to understand the processes and dynamics of awareness in all modes of dream space. The ambiguity of whether they should be sharks or dolphins (with both appearing without incident) reflects the dual nature of RAS mediation and simulacra transitions, from REM and non-REM sleep induction to consciousness reinitiation.

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Zsuzsanna had a dream with the same content in the same period, including the CGI association with ocean creatures. It happens regularly, with too much matching detail to be coincidental.

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Morning of May 5, 2017. Friday.



This is a very long dream (with only some scenes posted in the online version), but the basic scenario relates to a typical “end of the world” situation which often simply symbolizes dream cessation as a circadian rhythms factor, especially as many of mine relate to the sun. Still, “end of the world” dreams additionally seem to have a factor that is more long-term, which I suspect is also of additional biological symbolism.

The main scene is viewed in the nighttime sky, seemingly to the west (as my dream’s setting seems to be a distorted composite of Loomis Street and our present address, though with the emphasis on Loomis Street in America in the last scene). There is a beautiful coin-like disk hovering in the sky which is just above the moon. The moon and this disk are both about the same size, the moon probably about twice as large as presently viewed in reality. (In my dream, it is a full moon, though in reality, it apparently is moving past the first quarter at 65% visible.)

The face of the coppery disk seems to have a mix of Orion and Sagittarius as one character. It is directly above the moon. Bright beautiful rays of light are flowing out from each feature, mostly upwards. I am somewhat wary, as I consider the disk will probably alter the moon’s orbit. The rays are a mix of gold and blue. The imagery amazes me for what seems like at least fifteen minutes.

This turns out to be real-time symbolism for shared dreaming between Zsuzsanna and I, Zsuzsanna being the moon and the Orion/Sagittarius composite being my dream self level of consciousness. Even though the moon and the disk do not make contact, the thin rays (which actually appear as separated dashes and hyphens at times, in a perfect circumferential span) cross over each other. The moon seems to be pulling the disk into Earth’s orbit.

Next comes waking precursor symbolism and typical dream signs. I go up to the top of a hill (real-time conscious identity symbol) and there is a tomb that has been revealed due to the celestial events. The temple around it is fairly small, part of it serving more as a solid base that is only about the size of our bed. A group of unfamiliar people gather. I look closely at the tomb. It is of a young girl who is also an angel, with the name of Villiaphim. (This is a dream-generated name I have never heard before.) Curiously, there is a modern silver latch attached to the closed coffin at somewhat of an angle. I reason that this was added the last time the temple rose. I am thinking that I will now open the coffin but end up talking about the overall setting.

As I am talking about the details of the tomb that I recognize (such as the number two, in pairs of various orientations, forming the different symbols that Zsuzsanna and I had matched over the years, including the two facing another mirrored two as the “heart on the horizon” symbol), the personified preconscious shows up to become the usual nuisance it often is when I do not recognize my level of consciousness as a vivid dream. This time, he is an unfamiliar male teenager who makes fun of my inability to see the coffin as real-time bed symbolism.

The question mark sequence (in a set of four steps) appears engraved in a short squarish column to the left of the tomb. I am about to explain how the question mark was created by the collective unconscious to be found and used by Yang incarnate in his quest for Yin incarnate when he (the personified preconscious) starts mimicking me about my fallacy to not realize I am simply dreaming about the bed my physical body is in rather than an ancient coffin. He traces his finger over the engraving of one of the twos, copying what I am saying in an annoying cartoon voice. I am annoyed and start chasing him in a circle around the tomb. (This is subliminal coalescence recognition, stage one.)

As I am doing this, I shift to being with Zsuzsanna in the backyard of Loomis Street. I expect the sun to explode on the horizon (and it seems afternoon now) and it does. I know it is the end of the world, but I do not feel any fear. Zsuzsanna and I hold each other. Curiously, the sun had been just below the northern horizon, which of course is not possible. Still, the fire comes from the north as Earth burns. Just as the typical waking coalescence begins (while hugging Zsuzsanna), there is no mild abdominal jolt or other biological waking dynamic yet. Instead, I look around and see the fire only a few feet away, wondering what had happened, and why I (as my dream self) am still aware and in my dream. The ground is covered with what looks like runny egg yolk as well as egg white. Zsuzsanna and I are lying on the ground at this point. I reach over and pull the oversized “egg” from the ground (some of the “yolk” running out over the grass) and consider that about half the surface of the planet will now have to have this stuff peeled off as the “egg white and yolk” solidify a little more. Humanity will survive. I wake up to find that Zsuzsanna and I are in the same positions in bed in reality as we were in the waking symbolism (though this is not always the case).

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As I have written often before (but certainly not every time it happens), at least one dream per day (of the six to twelve I more clearly recall, not including all dream types) apparently comes from Zsuzsanna’s mind rather than mine, which are always thoughts she has that I could not possibly have known about, and it often follows a specific pattern. (This general rule occurred long before we met and has been validated virtually countless times.) It is also usually one of her more sustained thoughts relating to something that is different than usual. In this case, it related to her thoughts about runny egg yolks when she was frying an egg for herself (which is not a regular activity - and I have rarely had fried eggs in my lifetime).

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Morning of September 14, 2016. Wednesday.



I am using a notebook computer as well as accessing the Internet in an unfamiliar residence which is apparently where my family and I live. Our oldest daughter is present at one point and she is also using her computer. The large room does not have much furniture and I am seated on the floor, my daughter also seated on the floor on the other side of the room. The common distortion of somehow “using the Internet” in an actual notepaper notebook occurs (where images sometimes move on the paper, though not in every such dream, and in this case, actual type appears rather than handwriting).

I try to search for the term “Ghost Riders in the Sky”. I seem to have forgotten how to perform a search, at least in a more feasible manner. I type “Ghost Riders in the Sky” with a small keyboard so that it appears on the notebook paper. I then move the computer mouse across the notebook paper to near the top of the page and watch the image of the print move in line with the mouse. I seem to remember that by doing this, it activates the search. However, nothing happens. I then reason that one has to move the computer mouse more quickly so that it creates a sort of “momentum” as the print on the paper is then somehow “flung” into a virtual but unseen search engine box on the surface of the paper. I cannot seem to do it correctly. I reason that there must be a virtual impetus setting (for the computer mouse) of plus or minus and in a context menu but I cannot remember where it is.

I ask my daughter if she can get the search function to work on her computer. She seems to discover that the search function is offline and informs me of this. Still, I decide to try a different computer, which I recall is in a different room off to my right. There is a very large rectangular wooden table that holds six computer workstations (the narrower end of the table parallel to the doorway), both towers and desktops, each with a large CRT monitor, which are arranged as three facing outward on each side.

I decide to use the middle workstation on one side of the table; the side where the doorway is then to my left. The search still does not seem to be working after I type in the phrase “Ghost Riders in the Sky”. I notice that the USB cable that is required for the search function to work is at an angle, halfway out of the electrical outlet (which is a white upright surge protector power board with three outlets), but tipped to the left (which is based on two absurd notions; one, that a USB cable needs to be plugged in somewhere for an Internet search to work and two, that a USB cable would fit in an electrical outlet).

I adjust the USB cable to push it down fully into the outlet which is on my right. It is in the outlet between where the desktop computer is plugged in (left side) and where the CRT monitor is plugged in (right side). Soon, there is a sizzling sound. I am not sure what is going on. I see an orange glow coming from the monitor without paying much attention to the side of the monitor looking more like a vent with equidistant horizontal louvers. Soon, there are sparks flying out of the outlet along with a bit of fire and more sizzling from the other workstations. I soon realize that I had better turn off and unplug everything. First, I turn off the switch on the power board, but the noise and fiery glow seems to grow and spread and I wonder if I had turned it on instead of turning it off (which is illogical as I had just been using the computer). I go around the table attempting to turn everything off. There is even a power board with three outlets hanging to the left of the doorway at about chest-level, which I also turn off and pull plugs out of. My wife Zsuzsanna comes in. Our youngest son and daughter come in and playfully walk clockwise around the table cheerfully and I tell them that they should leave.

Although the fire becomes brighter and the sizzling louder, it does not really spread that far. Each fire mostly remains inside the perimeter of each computer workstation, which is looking more and more like an arrangement of tall vents with equidistant louvers that I mostly watch the fire through. There is hardly any smoke.

Soon, the crackling and sizzling becomes a very strange metallic music. It is firstly an instrumental version of “Ghost Riders in the Sky”. The metal of the burning workstations “plucks” the song, though is not that loud. The gremlins (from the 1984 movie “Gremlins”), though remaining unseen, are “singing” - though not the actual lyrics, just “ya ya ya ya, ya ya ya ya” to the melody, though for the chorus, they sing “yippee-yi-ay, yippee-yi-o, ghost riders in the sky…” the title being mostly muttered and somewhat indistinct as they go back into the “ya ya ya ya” verse. As I stand in the doorway, I marvel at what seems a “frozen moment” of perfection (even though I know it will cost a lot of money to replace the computers). The thin metallic plucking of the melody sounds very distinct as each louver of the vents snaps, though the workstations (and vents) still appear as complete and undamaged through the fire. (The equidistant horizontal lines of light have appeared in previous dreams, akin to venetian blinds and relating to the nature of liminal space, including with the potential of greater clarity or lucidity, between dreaming and waking.)

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Although I consider this a beautiful and unique dream (analogous to the dream-self identity as the phoenix), it carries the same core meaning (and sleeping, dreaming, and waking components and inherent symbols) as the majority of my dreams since early childhood. Firstly, my unconscious dream self seeks to return to whole consciousness (which is often the primary goal of most dream-self incarnations though in many cases the dream self attempts to “escape” from the “interference” of whole consciousness, or does not want to wake yet) through use of computer technology (as only the conscious mind has viable thinking skills or a stable system of logic). The common “return flight” aspect is here, but in this case as the “ghost riders in the sky” (the sky often being symbolic of the conscious mind as being “above” the dream self), where fire is mentioned in the actual song, fire of which represents emergent (waking) awareness (or if one prefers, the emerging sun or light of day). Orange is also a factor of sentience (and the need to wake up) between yellow and red (which also represent states of consciousness when dominant, yellow or gold being the “softer” phase and red often indicating more of a need to wake, in my case, often after sleeping a little too long, relative to circadian rhythms). The color red increases the pulse and heart rate, and raises your blood pressure in preparation for waking. Red, orange, or yellow are typically the final dominant colors in my dreams (depending on the type), where blue typically serves as the opposite, that is, dream induction itself (or the calming of consciousness which transmutes as the “sky” but focuses via the “sun”).

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Morning of July 25, 2016. Monday.



I have befriended, as a coworker, Terry O'Quinn (as John Locke on “Lost”). We are volcanologists working in an apparently isolated area, though there is no impending threat at first. Eventually however, I develop some sort of insight into seeing what is to come, though this is more as a typical pretense in somehow subliminally directing my dream (which happens a lot in non-lucid dreams). There are about six or seven in total working in this setting.

I inform them that they all died - though speaking of events about three days from now. They seem a bit wary of my advice that they should leave. They do not want to scrap the study, but I somehow convince them.

Suddenly, at one point as we are walking, we are all in the Cubitis living room. I gaze cautiously at a small bright orange circle (like a shallow hole possibly revealing orange rather than red lava inside) on the knotty pine wall to the right of the hidden door that was there in real life, somehow linked to a light switch in this otherwise dark room. (This is a sunrise metaphor and waking precursor and seemingly symbolizes a desire to somehow see my deceased parents prior to the new day as both my mother and father used that room during different time periods.) There is a sense of electrical energy rather than volcanic and there is no threat, just a sense of awe and curiosity. The others follow my lead willingly. There is an interesting scene of an earthquake but I inform them that there is still time to escape.

There is a scene where Michael Dawson shows up to drive us to the airport. He looks as if he has been badly burned by being close to the eruption, though it is more like an unrealistic type of “burn” where he is more like a shadow made of ash. It is an unusual effect but he seems perfectly fine and is even cheerful.

At a later point I am looking at Terry O'Quinn through the window of a commercial jet airliner that is flying high in the sky (and it seems I somehow phased through the wall of the aircraft I had just been in to do this). He notices me and there is the idea that I am his guardian angel or even his idea of God. He is aware of me and acknowledges my presence in a somewhat cautious but respectful manner.

Finally, there is a bizarre scene where I am looking at the front halves of the heads of all the volcanologists as they are lying on the surface of a table in a medical laboratory. They are slid around almost like dinner plates a couple times. I am trying to work out where the rest of their bodies are though they seem fairly alert and are answering questions and getting examined somehow.

There seems to be a question over how I knew they would have otherwise died. I reveal my ability, which supposedly came from some sort of injection in this same laboratory. A female medical worker seeks to give me another injection to undo my abilities but I cause her to fly backward across the room and against the wall with telekinesis. I am able to fly away as well as to help the volcanologists escape their second possible fate of being lab rats.

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Morning of June 26, 2016. Sunday.



My wife Zsuzsanna and I, about ten years younger, are sitting on a couch in an unknown residence which is implied to be our home. (My dream self does not perceive it as unfamiliar.) We are watching “The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet” on our television. I notice colors in certain parts of the otherwise black-and-white show, which puzzles me.

Holding Zsuzsanna’s hand as we get up, with her accompanying me on my left, we walk up to our television. We continue to watch the show, but the screen seems unrealistically large. To the left is Harriet Nelson in her kitchen. I am aware of Ozzie Nelson in at least two scenes. There is also an unknown teenage female who is in one scene.

I start pointing out the different colors in a few different locations even though much of the imagery still seems to be in black-and-white. The curtains seem to have somewhat of an orange tint and at this point, we are looking through an actual doorway and to the left, where the curtains are unrealistically implied to be beyond our side of the wall, covering windows which are somehow not on our side of the wall. I tell Zsuzsanna how I do not think the colorizing is very good as it seems to make the scene look less realistic. I continue to converse with Zsuzsanna as we are now seemingly looking through the doorway of an area of their house, or rather, are now somehow present on the television studio set. Soon, most of the setting is in color.

I notice a man standing to our right on the other side of the doorway, in shadow and unrealistically tall. I acknowledge him politely, thinking he is Ricky Nelson, even pointing him out to Zsuzsanna as such, but he seems annoyed after watching us for a short time. He is David Boreanaz, as he appeared in “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” and “Angel”. I realize that we have disrupted the filming or live broadcast of a television show that was meant to copy “The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet” but without anyone knowing it was a copy or even referencing the older show.

I apologize to him. Zsuzsanna and I walk away from the doorway into the semidarkness of a featureless room (which means we had teleported as it is no longer our lounge room). He comes out from a different doorway about ten feet to the right of the one we had been in. I continue to apologize for having disrupted the episode. He seems very tall and imposing but I do not feel threatened. “There are no cell phones here,” he informs us, sounding slightly frustrated but not very emotional, and I tell him we are not carrying cell phones.

I tell him that he should play Ozzie Nelson, as he looks just like him. I try to sound respectful, but he seems annoyed by my remark. He probably wants to get back to his work, as it may be live and consequently may need to include an improvised explanation for our disruption to its continuity. I again consider that they may not want viewers to know what television show they are copying even though it seemed we were watching the original show at first (before we apparently teleported to the set). My dream fades as I continue to tell him how he should play Ozzie Nelson (even though that may be who he was meant to be impersonating rather than Ricky Nelson when I had first seen him in the doorway).

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This dream journal entry and supplementation was optimized for conciseness and clarity on Saturday, 5 August 2017. Thank you very much for your encouraging emails.

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There was a thread of prescience, as Zsuzsanna had started to check out the “Angel” series from the library without first telling me (and she had not read my entry at the time). This follows the general rule of me continuously having dreams about something which had been on her mind without her having told me.

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I had originally theorized that “there are no cell phones here” was in reference to the preconscious not typically being a viable vessel of communication, as its primary purpose is to bring the dreamer out of the dream. However, I now realize what the reference may likely be and I cannot believe I did not catch it. Although the waking transition began with doorway waking symbolism, it did not serve to wake me but instead deeply vivified my dream self’s awareness in this case. Still, my dream continued to resolve with the most common form of waking symbolism, return flight. Even though we were in a featureless room of a television studio in the last scene as it transmuted into liminal space, I only now consider that it was a reference to “no cell phones on flights” (and yes, that is a significant gaffe on my part).

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I found it amazing how my dream’s dimensionality was so vivid yet so skewed, where the wall on the other side of the doorway immediately to our left somehow goes back beyond our side of the wall as well as having windows on that side and not on our side, which would be impossible in reality even by deliberately tricky perspective.

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In real life, I never thought of David Boreanaz as looking like Ozzie Nelson even though I now see a resemblance.

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Zsuzsanna and I have never watched “The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet” together but we have watched “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”, “Angel”, and “Bones”.

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