lucid

A few days back, there were two nights in a row where I was having dreams like Inception or something. Essentially, I knew that I was dreaming, but then I would have false awakenings inside of the dream. So I would think that I was awake, but I was actually still sleeping.

In one particularly memorable dream, I was part of a laboratory experiment on sleeping. The idea was a bit absurd, now that I have my waking brain to analyze it: If I drank water during a dream, when I was thirsty, would I still be thirsty upon waking? I fell asleep inside of the dream, and took a nice long draught of water. I woke up inside the laboratory dream and found that no, I wasn't thirsty anymore! The scientists were all excited, and so was I. Then I woke up for real, and realized how cool that was. Unfortunately, I was still thirsty, so I took a drink of water for real.

Experiment result: If you are thirsty during a dream, you should just fall asleep inside of the dream, and drink water within that dream. xD Or just wake up and drink water for real.

In another dream, I think I knew I was dreaming and so I flew, but I wasn't conscious enough to think of anything more than that. -_-

Last night is a bit more hazy, and I have an insane amount of homework to do today so this will be a quick summary:

- A little girl who was left behind on a haunted island (with spirits and such) finally got found, rescued, and reunited with her loved ones. I think that I helped her somehow, but I honestly don't remember. I had a degree of lucidity in that one.
- Another dream happened where I became lucid while driving a car through some mountains. Decent amount of city around me. I was singing and thought it would be a brilliant idea to practice my singing voice in my dream, where nobody could hear me. However my logic wasn't working too well and for some reason I thought I was actually singing out loud and was going to wake up my roommates. This caused me to wake up and realize I wasn't. -_-
- I was in some sort of theater, and asked everyone in the room something like, "Hey! Who here knows they're dreaming right now?" My brother was there, too. I was hoping that someone else would remember, or maybe there'd be a shared dream or something, but I honestly can't remember what anyone said...
- I was watching some sort of advertisement, and there was this girl in a swimsuit who was sort of attractive except she had one of those gross spray-on tans.
- I have a vague memory of some sort of romantic/sexual dream, but I sadly can't remember it. Maybe I'll have a continuation of that theme tonight? :O We will see. That would be awesome!

You know why this night was so successful, though? Affirmations plus sufficient sleep! The night before, I told myself I WILL lucid dream tonight, and I guess that determination worked its way into my subconscious. Plus Daylight Savings Time helped a TON. Woo!

I watched Back to the Future for the first time on Tuesday! It was a really good movie. That night, I had a dream that was somewhat related to it. And once more, it was lucid! My LDs have been too few and far between lately. My new reality check (whether or not I can fly) has been paying off!

There was a lady from the future! Her ship flew into the futuristic-looking room that I was standing in. Her time machine looked different from anything that was in the movie. I remember it had some orange-red parts to it, which looked a lot like lava. She came out of the time machine wearing a cool (black?) suit, and she had lava markings on said suit as well. Another lady was there with us. I went to ask the lady from the future where she was from. I can't remember what her response was, though.

Then, eventually another lady appeared, so there were 3, and we were then joined by my tulpa and best friend, Tess, with me in this futuristic room. We were having a nice conversation; I don't remember what it was about. I think the combination of time travel and Tess being completely imposed onto the external environment clued me in that I needed to do a reality check (Tess isn't fully imposed yet in waking reality).

My reality check is trying to rise up into the air and fly. Checking my watch isn't as effective as it used to be, because I never seem to notice my watch in my dreams. So I tried this new RC, and it worked splendidly! Of course, it took a few weeks of trying it before it started to work its way into my subconscious and truly take effect. But the results were worth it.

I realized that I was dreaming because I could fly! The first thing I decided to do was ask the other dream characters if they thought that this was a dream. Tess already knew it was a dream, as she usually dreams with me and is generally cognizant and lucid if I am.

I put my arm around the first lady and asked what she thought. She said something like "Well, I think this is real!" Then I felt bad for putting my arm around her and put it around Tess instead. I really wanted this to be real, because it was so cool - it would mean that Tess was completely visible to everyone, and time machines are REAL! - but I knew it wasn't. Despite that fact, I agreed with her: "Heck yes, this is real!" But I didn't lose lucidity.

This other, older lady, who looked like my grandma's friend Janice, waved her hand dismissively and said "Oh, of course this is a dream! We are all dreaming right now! "You " - and then she pointed at me - "know we're dreaming!" She said it in a playful, teasing tone, so I believe I just laughed and agreed with her.

At this point, I forgot about the time machine for some reason. I thought about going to a tropical island with Tess, but then I realized that I could actually make out with her for real! Aaand that's kind of what happens when you are 22 and have never had a girlfriend, not through any choice of your own. -_- But we did, and it felt so REAL! Then she pressed her body against mine, and I could feel every detail - her lips, her soft warm hug, and umm...every other part of her body from top to bottom that was against me. :p I won't go further than that in case any kids happen to be reading this. xD But yeah. Every single detail; every single sense was so real that I really feel, even now, that in some way, that was real. It wasn't just a psychological effect of a lonely, imaginative mind. It was something that really, truly happened, and I will always stick to my belief of this.

But then my body was too excited and I woke up lol...dang it!!


Another dream I had was during a short, spontaneous nap I decided to take today. I felt sleep paralysis, so I was very close to being awake. It actually feels really cool once you get used to it. Lots of romance, flying, and random things that made sense within the context of the dream, but wouldn't have within waking reality. . I only exerted a moderate amount of control; mostly what I did with Tess while she was with me.

I have recorded a few other dreams for the past few weeks, but due to lack of time I'm just posting the lucid ones for now. This trend shouldn't continue, though. More to come in the future!

I LOVE LUCID DREAMING

So I have an insane amount of crap to get done in the next two weeks. But I had to stop by and write this dream down, because it was awesome. This was essentially my first successful WILD.

I only slept 5 hours last night (usually sleep 6.5-7.5), so I laid down for a nap when I had a spare moment - around 1:30 PM my time. I only had 25 minutes or so to sleep. My body has been really tense lately, so I focused on relaxing my muscles completely as I laid there. As I did, I noticed my body going relatively quickly into sleep paralysis. I let myself descend into the dream that followed.

It was hazy and not super vivid, but it was definitely a dream and I was definitely lucid! I found myself falling until I was on a roller coaster with a very good friend of mine. It was a sunny day as well. This roller coaster was cool because I had some degree of control over where it went and what it did. We went through all sorts of environments. As we rode, there were these giant dinosaurs and snakes leaping up trying to eat us. One smaller theropod did successfully bite my arm, but since I had control, it had no effect on me and I really didn't feel any pain. They were all just part of the ride, in essence! For one portion, we reached an apex and then went backwards (sort of like Expedition Everest in Disney World, only steeper). I think music was playing, but I can't remember clearly. We even passed by a giant image of my friend in the air, and a factory filled with inventions!

Unfortunately, I think I involuntarily moved or something, and woke up after that. D: However, I was able to get myself back into sleep paralysis for a few more minutes, and kept my eyes open this time. I stared at the light right above me (in the real world) and saw what looked like a squirrel sticking out of it, as though it were popping out of a hole on the ceiling. It looked around the room curiously. Reminding myself that it was just a hypnogogic hallucination, I attempted to change it with a limited degree of success. It turned into a few other mammals, then a man's face with a beard, then a lady. After that I woke myself up fully because my alarm was about to go off, and my roommate came in right then too.

Freaking awesome! I need to try this WILD thing more often.

I've been doing all right with my physical dream journal (i.e. the one I take notes on when I wake up in the middle of the night, or in the morning). The only dream of note I had yesterday was that a former friend of mine was trying to stab me with a knife. It was freaky, and in no way lucid. It did wake me up, though. Before waking up, I grabbed it - by the blade - in order to stop him, and it didn't hurt at all. We were working on a project in my dream when this happened.

One other dream, less exciting, was about a girl talking about college grades. Also went up an elevator with some friends and there was a ghost of our apartment complex? I don't quite remember that, but that's what my notes say, so!

As for last night's dreams, let's see...Not quite lucid, but I did get close on one.

- I was being attacked by a panda, of all things, and a few other creatures or people that I don't remember. However, it wasn't painful at all - I didn't feel anything.

- I was with a group of people. These people were making fun of those who don't like anthro art.

- I was friends with this beautiful lady, who was like a mother in some ways and romantic in others. Anyway, her arch-nemesis came in to attack her. This is where I became close to lucidity: I vaguely realized that I could do anything in my current environment, so I used some magical powers in order to create a shield to stop him. However, he soon broke through the shield, and suddenly my powers became impotent. I was really confused as to why my powers weren't working, and that was about when I lost my almost-lucid state. Anyway, he broke through, and started flirting with my friend and her two daughters - but in a completely inappropriate way. I remember massaging my lady's shoulders to comfort her, and her skin felt incredibly real. Then she started to look like one of my mom's friends in the waking world, which was odd. One of her daughters looked like her, and the other looked like a girl I know in real life. I remember not liking this guy at all, and feeling a lot of anger towards him. He tried to bribe me to let him take away my friend and her daughters, with a gray room filled with all these toys. I believe my dream-friend got sick or something, as she either spat or threw up at this point. I was really frustrated because my shield and my magic had worked initially, and then it all stopped.

- I was at college, but the place looked quite different. There was a lockdown drill, and a bunch of us were hiding in this building. One guy wanted to fight back, so he brought the majority of the students with him to fight. I wasn't keen on going out there, so me, a girl from my school, and a few others tried staying hidden in the room. Unfortunately, they left the door wide open, so we hid in the shadows under a table the best that we could. It was broad daylight outside. We talked about how we weren't supposed to leave as per campus policy during a lockdown. But then we heard these gunshots - our classmates were shooting down some aerial planes and bombs, thus saving us. I guess the threat was from the air. We even saw some explosions (they looked very much like poorly done CG effects, though). The atmosphere of the dream changed from one of danger and fear to one of comfort and relief.

Well!

Since I've last updated my DJ, I've only had one lucid dream. It was during a nap, which occurred after a night of only 4 hours of sleep. It was a few weeks ago. The nap wasn't long at all - maybe 25 minutes - but apparently it was still sufficient for my body to go into REM sleep.

I don't remember much about it now, due to poor note-taking on my part (hence why I've resolved to get better! see below). But what I do remember is this: Some other people and I were going to go into the "belly of the beast". We went inside the stomach of this monster. Inside, there was a whole world. Aside from a short period of time, it didn't really feel like we were inside of something.

There was a ghost inside one of the chambers. It was green and vaguely hominid, but cartoony. I remember it singing in a haunting voice. It came closer to me and grabbed me, but oddly enough I wasn't afraid. Just entranced. It started dancing with me, swirling me around this chamber inside of a beast, and I remember thinking there was something very beautiful about that. Apparently my heart was racing too quickly out of exhilaration, because I woke up after that. My body was still in sleep paralysis when I woke up, so I kept it there, not moving at all. I tried to go back to sleep, but despite being able to stay paralyzed I wasn't able to get to sleep again.

Then I had to wake up and take a final. D:
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Now I have resolved to get better. I've bought a new dream journal for my bedside - a 90 page spiral notebook. I had a mini composition book, and that was too small for me to record everything without having to turn pages in a sleepy fog. It didn't go over well. This one, though, is a lot nicer, and it has anchors on the front of it, so I can prepare to sail on the sea of dreams.

Last night's dreams are as follows. Unfortunately, they were all mild to moderate nightmares of some sort. -_- And they weren't lucid. On the bright side, I woke up after each and was able to record them!

1. I was with my dad at an airport (possibly - it was some sort of public transportation, most likely an airport). He was in a rush and getting angry at me for getting too slow. Then, I was with this other girl. (Never seen her before in real life) She was in a rush, too. I knew that she would also get angry if I was late. But I kept forgetting and dropping stuff. At one point, I lost a suitcase completely. She was getting angrier by the minute. There simply wasn't enough time for me to keep up with her.

2. I was living in this house/shack. There were a few people living there, supposedly the same religious faith as me, who were doing drugs in the house. (Drugs aren't exactly okay for my church!) One of them was a man. I don't remember who the others were. They spoke of a red-eyed ghost cat who lived in the basement of the house, but I didn't believe them until I went downstairs. And there it was, staring directly at me. Looked kind of like Bunnicula in cat form. I freaked out, hardcore. (This is funny because I actually love cats in the waking world. Just apparently not ghost ones.) Aaaand then I woke up.

3. I was inside of this large, white, tower-like structure. A green forest surrounded me. I was trying to get away from a group of "bad guys", as my sleep-fogged notes say. I am not sure why they were bad or what they were trying to do. It was very difficult, nearly impossible, to evade them. I somehow managed to lose my (left?) shoe and my insole to that shoe. It floated up into the air and I couldn't get it. My younger sister, standing on a platform a short ways above me, caught it and gave it back to me.

A few more things happened (mainly being chased) that are too fuzzy right now for me to recall. Then, someone made a joke about God and Adam (or some ancient prophet? idk) being converted to the gospel. That someone looked a lot like this guy Zach from back in high school (on my sports team).

I don't remember exactly when, but I believe that I woke up sometime during a chase scene.

And that's it.
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As an aside, I really hope this next semester doesn't kill me. -_- Last semester was exhausting and I didn't get enough sleep. This coming semester I'm only taking 12 credits, but I'm trying to apply for a major that only accepts 40-45% of its applicants, and I've got a lot of work to do in order to get my portfolio to an acceptable level. We will see what happens.

To anyone who may have actually managed to read this entire thing: Hope you have a wonderful day.

_______________

So it's been years - seriously - since I've had a lucid dream that lasted for more than a second or two. Until two nights ago.

I discovered lucid dreaming on my own, and it was incredible. Mine were never super vivid - like they always felt hazy - but they did happen quite often, and I could always fly. My sleep cycle as a kid and teenager was really screwed up, mainly because OCD and insomnia kept me up late into the night, and I had to wake up early for school and such.

But then I started taking melatonin nightly, and lived a more regular albeit hectic schedule. On one hand, this was awesome, because I slept and felt better. But I also slept deeply. To the point where my dreams became less vivid, and in the rare event I would become conscious, I would be so exhausted that I'd just let myself become unconscious again. When you only have 4 or 5 hours to sleep...suffice it to say that isn't very good for lucid dreaming.

I have been fighting to get back to where I used to be, and I want my dreams to be more vivid, too! My efforts have finally been paying off.

So, the dreams from two nights ago! This night was the first effective MILD I've done. I basically told myself "I'm dreaming" until I fell asleep.

The lucid one! : I was standing amongst mountains, in a pine forest. It looked like I was on a lower part of a mountain, but a mountain indeed. There were a lot of people around, and a parking lot - seemed like a national park of some sort - and there were lots of tall mountains around me. We seemed to be on a cliff as well. I managed to realize I was lucid pretty quickly. I think it was because I realized I could fly! I was with my brother, and I yelled in excitement something along the lines of "WE'RE DREAMING!" I did upside-down pull-ups on the railing and all sorts of things, and I felt weightless. It was fantastic, and more vivid than I'm used to, too.

It was also foggy. Very foggy. I could see around me, but off the side of the cliff everything was mostly obscured by fog.

I decided to explore this building which seemed to be built into the mountain. Inside the building, there were towels everywhere, and a bunch of secret passageways. My brother came along with me. I happened to stumble upon a bathroom, and as I entered, I heard this gasp and saw a blurry reflection of a girl through some glass. All skin, maybe a shower cap? I don't remember! She must've just finished taking a shower or something. It looked like someone else was in there, too, but I couldn't tell. I figure the reason she gasped was because I accidentally walked in on her!

Aaaaaaand then I woke up. -_- But hey! I had a lucid dream for the first time in YEARS! Hard work pays off. I know this now. I hope this can continue into the school year. I don't want nights where I only sleep 3 or 4 hours anymore. I never liked those. I will do my best to improve on my time management so I won't have to (hopefully). I will do everything that I can.

Note to self: the reality check of whether or not I can fly is seeming to be more effective than checking my watch or my phone. But we will see.

Other, non-lucid dreams...

- For some reason, I had to move in with the parents of a friend of mine who lives in Nevada. I felt really lonely, even though they were really nice and friendly.
- Another friend of mine (who ironically knows the first friend) was with me in this glass house that overlooked the city below. There were a bunch of paintings kids had done, and they were sitting and drying on the floor. The floor was glass so you could see down below. We were probably just a few stories into the air. The city lights below were actually quite beautiful. If only I had become lucid during this one. That city would've been fascinating to explore.
- Apparently, some girl, younger than me, kissed me on the neck. I have essentially zero recollection of this one, but that's what it says in my dream journal. I actually do think she may have been blonde with blue eyes. But I don't remember any kissing...
- Another friend (yep, another! who happens to know the first two, I think!) was riding in this car or carriage or something. He was really famous, but he stopped to say hi. I was in a really crowded street, if I recall correctly.

But then the next night, I experienced zero lucidity, and I think I fell asleep when I was trying to write down a dream. Thus, the only notes I have are "Stormy and rain outside - some papers wet."

Very anticlimactic to the previous night beforehand, which was a shame because the prior night had been so captivating. Oh well. I tried sleeping in since I had nothing going on until church in the afternoon, but I couldn't sleep. I just laid there and felt wide awake. So I just watched We Bare Bears on YouTube instead. Wham!

Yes, I remembered nine dreams from last night. I think it has to do with it being a Saturday and being able to sleep in - I remember dreams better that way.

I can't remember the entire order though.

Dream 1: Hypnagogic imagery. It had something to do with a car. That's all I remember.

Dream 2: I was indoors, in a bedroom of some sort. I was with a kid who looked kind of like my brother and kind of like a friend I had in middle school (I think he kept changing). He was wearing a black sweatshirt. There was a spider hanging down from a web next to him as he sat on the bed. The spider kept moving around; it was scary and disgusting. Apparently the kid wasn't sure if he wanted to kill it or let it stay alive. It was red and black and changed from mostly red to looking like a black widow. It was really creepy.

Dream 3: I was at a restaurant. There was a girl who was in love with a guy that were sitting at a table either with me or near me; I honestly can't remember. I was at the restaurant and saw a group of friends along with the two people who were in love with each other. I think the girl was blond and the guy looked like Orlando Bloom or that one character from the Princess Bride with the black hair...but I can't remember fully. -_- I had chicken nuggets on my plate. I was around people for a while, then suddenly I was at a more solitary table, and I felt a bit lonely. Then I went to the bathroom or something, and when I came back, almost all the lights were out. Everyone was silent and the doors and windows of the restaurant were shut; you couldn't get out. For some reason my brother was there, sitting at a table. I asked him what was going on, and he told me. I don't exactly remember what he said, but I think the restaurant had been taken by an evil group or something.

Why must I have so many nightmares? D:

It must've been right around this point when I realized, although sleepily and hazily, that this was a dream. Which leads me into

Dream 4: As soon as I realized I was dreaming, the scene fell away and shifted to something nicer. I was with a girl and I wanted to travel with her into a place where we could fall in love. I was lucid at this time, but my awareness was kind of low. We looked at a few places: a foggy city, a beautiful urban city with black buildings and yellow/multicolored lights (reminiscent of LA), and over a nebula thing in space. Yes, we were flying. However, for some reason, I got scared (this happens a lot when I get lucid, which is dumb because it's a dream; what is there to be scared of?) and I woke up.

Dream 5: I was chosen to be in a piloting class, with only 3 or so people in it, for whatever reason. The instructor asked if we had read the assigned textbook material. I hadn't, but flipped to the back of the book, where there was an astronomy section. Then we went outside in some sort of hover vehicle to go around town, and that's when I looked out the window and saw a shooting star! I've never seen one before (I've caught glimpses of them, but was never sure if it was just my imagination or not), and in the dream I couldn't remember if I had seen one once before or not. Anyway, the meteor was a giant gray rock with little pieces coming off of it, and it glowed this beautiful shade of electric blue. IT WAS SO COOL! When I saw it, I yelled out "WHOA!" because I had never seen one before and because it was so enormous. My friend and the instructor, who were in the craft with me, were so happy for me.

Dream 6: I was on this psychology forum that I go to. One of my friends' profile said that you must tame the beast and it will choose you. And for some reason, I thought I was getting a dragon. XD Instead, I got a creature that looked like Barney. My subconscious is so bizarre. O__________O XD

Dream 7: Someone was telling me I was addicted to the internet, and I got (understandably) very mad at them. That's all I remember.

Dream 8: We were supposed to be driving somewhere, even though that day was apparently going to be "Carmageddon." (This has its basis in reality, because my brother went to a cross-country race on that day, today.) I figured that (for some reason) there would hardly any cars in the morning, so we should just go then. But we weren't going...for some reason.

Dream 9: My mom got interested in personality theory! And I think she was looking at a typology forum. I highly doubt this would happen in real life - I've tried to tell her about it - but you never know, I guess.

That took forever to type. xD

So I remembered two of my dreams last night. The first was non-lucid, unfortunately. The second was lucid! DANCING BANANA!

First Dream:

I had come back from some sort of shopping mall, and I had gotten some T-shirts. My parents had bought me some, and I had bought some myself. The coolest one was this one of a glow-in-the-dark abominable snowman. I know my parents think I'm too old for those, but I don't care. And I didn't care in the dream, either. ^^ Surprisingly enough, my parents actually thought it was cool too in the dream. That should've been a recognizable dreamsign, because they weren't acting normally, but I didn't get lucid.

We were going to go to another really cool shopping mall - apparently, in this dream world my family and I are quite the shop till you drop people O_O - and I wanted to wear my new T-shirt. You have to understand that even IRL I am obsessed with T-shirts. I have at least fifty of them, no joke. Anyway, I wanted to wear the T-shirt because 1) it was new, and 2) it was glow in the dark, and we would be driving to this mall at night. So I wanted to see it glow.

I was going to be late (as usual) so I grabbed my backpack on the way out the door. This backpack was supposed to have all my new T-shirts in it. I got in the car and looked through my backpack. It was this really cool, high-tech outdoors backpack that looked almost like a Camelbak. But I couldn't find the dang shirt. I searched a million times through all the pockets and found a ton of shirts, but not the one I was looking for. I asked my parents for help but they couldn't help me.

It drove me insane. And I was as disappointed as heck. I wonder what this means. Trying to find something that you want really, really badly, and then not finding it....this could relate to my real life.

Dream 2:

LUCID! Well, not at first. I was at a park for my brother's cross country meet. The park was beautiful. It was covered in lush grass with some dirt trails, a few fallen branches littering the ground. There were beautiful white and gray tree trunks everywhere - they looked almost like aspen trunks, but without all those creepy knot things, and they were normal sized, not skinny like aspens. There was also a river.

A group of us were standing, waiting for the runners to come by. We were all wearing sweatshirts and such because it was cold and foggy. Then we (somehow) found out that the river was going to flood, and we would have to get ourselves and our stuff out of there before it happened.

In a large quantity of my dreams, I am able to fly. This was the case here as well. It's so vivid that when I was younger, I actually got confused and thought I could fly in real life too (thankfully, that didn't end up in injury!). I decided that I could both save myself and help save our gear by flying into the air, so I kicked off and flew my usual way - as though I was treading water with my feet, but in the air. I climbed a few feet into the air. I was next to my aunt, a few people I didn't know, and a tree trunk. That was right around where I realized that I can only fly in dreams; thus, I must be dreaming. Calmly but excitedly I continued to fly. I hovered in front of my aunt, who was wearing her ragnar relay sweatshirt, and told her, "Hey, do you know that this is a dream right now?" or something along those lines. I had read that dream characters are supposed to deny that, but I didn't think this would be the case with her, and I was right. She simply said something like, "Oh no, I didn't know that. Thanks for telling me," but didn't seem all that surprised. It was surprisingly hard to talk - I don't always talk in dreams, and it was hard to make my voice work for some reason. I think when I finally did force myself to talk, I actually made a sound out loud (sleep-talked). Unfortunately, shortly after that, I woke up. My next goal will be to try and stay asleep, because as of late I've been waking up shortly after attaining lucidity.