non-lucid

7.30 (after a WBTB and at least an hour getting back to sleep)

I'm a warehouse Manager (DS) walking around a warehouse. My manager was there with a visiting group of senior managers (she had once been my boss in a non warehouse-related job) That's dreams for you...pick and mix your jobs and co-workers.

She took me to one side and said quietly that she and the visiting group had been walking around for quite a while and there had been no sign of me. I immediately got defensive and said that I was in another warehouse (although I didn't have a clue where I'd been... THE big DS). Then I apparently "fessed up" and said I'd been feeling a bit down lately and it was wrong of me not to be around. (crawler)

Cut to another warehouse scene with me walking around watching people working...then cut to me apparently entering a gloomy London-type marbled office block. I realize that I have no shirt on. I've dreamed that before (two days before my LD on 9/9/13.

I immediately thought "this is a dream" and I was lucid....for all of 10 seconds. I looked around but there was really nothing to see because it was gloomy. Because I've had seven lucid experiences (including two after I left DV for the 1st time) I know I was lucid.

I think I was in a shallow sleep, probably just waking and it was maybe just the right combination of alertness and the last gasp of my dream. I didn't feel the ecstasy I felt after my first LD last time but I've been conditioning myself not to...just a quiet satisfaction...so I don't think excitement knocked me out of the dream.

After I woke I tried to DEILD (I've been rehearsing it) but it felt like my REM period had expired and nothing happened. Again I failed to RC before getting up...I seem to have a mental block re that exercise.

I'm the cautious type and I'm not claiming it as an LD. Last time I had my second LD five days after the first one and that was a longish dream (so here's hoping)

It's been a difficult couple of weeks, where I've had a lot of health problems, so this is a nice boost to my confidence. I've been occasionally waking feeling a bit fragile, but it's been nothing like the times I used to wake feeling really ill

Age brings its problems and it's not easy at the moment. I've solved night leg-pains by changing to a memory-foam mattress. (I must be getting like the Princess and the pea.) But I have increasing problems with my known dust allergy...probably made worse at the moment by my redecorating and off-gassing from the new mattress;-

Off Gassing and Memory Foam

Of course, waking, staying still with eyes closed and grabbing dreams can do without distractions like this so it's going to take me a while to get there (particularly as I decided to slightly apply the brakes this time around) So far, I haven't woken with the deathly "ill" feeling I occasionally had last time around so that's probably a good strategy.

One dream last night, plus one lost because I was coughing and spluttering.

9.00
I'm an athlete (DS = ridiculous) and racing someone up a sharp incline. I'm well ahead and I show off by slowing down and looking around. My nearest competitor nearly catches up and a large man is blocking my way and slows me down even more. I finally only win by the merest touch...and no, I've not being reading the "tortoise and the hare" recently.

I've tried analyzing this dream but with no obvious result yet.

During the day I'm on track...doing ADA etc. I'm also trying visualizing...trying like hell to "see" shapes. If I can only visualize WILD and DEILD may be my way in. I really cannot see "anything" at the moment so I really want to change that.

Full moon in the Northern hemisphere people. Some researchers say it's a good dream time but the Moon doesn't seem to affect me....not even hairy hands...

4.45
Weird, frankly unpleasant dream. It followed my WBTB after 1 choline and very small coffee. (so far, that experiment always results in "yukky" dreams) Seems to bring out my dark side?

With a mixed group at a gathering or party and there's a row of toilets in the centre of the room. Men with their (girlfriends?) piggy-backing decide to sit on the toilets and do their business...still with the women on their backs! Sometimes, when the men finish the women drop off their backs and do their business...it gets worse.

One guy stands up and he's still got his woman on his back and she does her business from a height...he notices and says "Ugh!" and lets her drop. Ugh indeed!

I'll carry on trying the choline/coffee mix just to see if it always results in an unpleasant or uncomfortable dream...I can't, for the life of me, see why it should but we'll see.

7.30 Fragment
Working someplace (DS) and preparing to go off shift. Wandering around, carrying my work clothes and watching the clock as if time was fast running out and not seeming to know what to do or where to put the work clothes (worth turning into a major film do you think?) Slight variation on my major dream sign.

The earlier dream, though unpleasant, set me thinking...complete lack of any odour. If you're going to throw dreams like that at me Ed, maybe I'll make lack of odour a DS...then one hint of lavender and it's a dream buddy!

Last night the wife went off to babysit our grand-daughter so the night was mine. Whether to really go for LD or maybe get a woman in? I chose the marginally less difficult option and retired slightly earlier, read some LD stuff and went to sleep at midnight as per usual.

1.20
Somewhere in the Middle East and there was a palpable air of impending unrest...it seemed to be labour organizations v Government. A local well respected and moderate man had disappeared. "Why him?" someone said.

OK short, sad but early...a good sign...one fish in the net...then it slowly fell apart. I decided to set my alarm for 5.30 am in time to WBTB and catch the REM happy hours. It took me at least 2½ hours to get to sleep...I lay there and heard the woman next door idle her engine for at least 5 mins before setting off for her boot fair.

Her daughter's friend rolled up then waited as the daughter thundered back down the alleyway to get something she'd forgotten...amazing how one slightly-built girl can sound like a rampaging water-buffalo. Bang! door shut...Voom! off they went. Then the wife got home and I decided to WBTB again.

9.15
Walking in a large town for quite a while (although I don't remember much about it) I passed one guy who I thought was laughing at my age and I boldly challenged him. He said he was merely sweating because he'd just come from the gym??? Then he started DC speak about some girl and I reversed direction.

When I felt I'd gone far enough I ran really hard (DS = impossible to run hard) back to the town centre. On the way I passed a really amazing landscaped hill, with beautiful plants, statues and waterfalls. I couldn't resist climbing the hill then somehow decided it was somebody's front garden and I stopped climbing. By standing on tiptoe I could just see a large mansion at the top of the hill

So...it occurs to me that if I had pushed the lorry over the cliff edge on my dream of 4/9 I would have seen a really amazing vista and if I had climbed the hill last night....why so inhibited?

11.00
I'm a space (trooper?) with an automatic rifle and I'm pursuing aliens (who looked a lot like the Mangalores, from the film "The Fifth Element") on a planet that looked suspiciously like 20th century suburban London. They moved unfairly quickly and I never managed to hit one...I also threw grenades but never actually saw explosions.

Then they disappeared and I spent what seemed like ages looking for them (the mega mega mega dream sign) Then I'm closely followed by a young male (noooo...not again!) But he merely wanted to know what I was doing.

I went all show-offy and I explained that the aliens were "Karjons" (good name...wonder if it's been used before?) and I was hunting them. Then he launched into DC babble and I woke up. I wish I could condition myself to RC before I get up as well as I seem to be primed to wake at the sound of DC chatter.

All that was left to do was explain to my incredulous wife that I hadn't slept for 11 hours "if you take off the time I was up + the time I was sleepless I doubt if I slept for more than 8 hours" (well...I'm convinced)

Another night of frustrated plans, cock-ups and little else...but I've got a idea.

I'll switch from bed to living-room recliner throughout the night...a sort of mix-and-match to combat the pain. I may even slip out of the house at aprox 5.00 am every morning for a quick 15 minute walk. When we move to the coast next year I'll put a single recliner in my bedroom to leave the living room clear for the wife when she gets up.

Finally, right at the last gasp of the morning I had a dream fragment.

"My house" is right on the very edge of a very high escarpment (assumed rather than seen, because a very large van was parked on the edge and blocking the view.) I touched the side of the van but it was so close to the edge I feared I might push it over.

But, to the left, there was a gap between the van and the house and I peered round. I saw a vast river valley. The view was so vivid and so breathtaking. Moving through the valley and up towards me was a huge circular spaceship...mind blowing.

I'll take that as a visual word of encouragement...

Seduced...me?...at my age? No, it's not what you think...

The past few days have been desolate. My worst enemy is the pain I experience if I lay down more than about three hours. It forces me to move when I wake and it completely buggers up dream recall (although the dreams have been very faded anyway). Really I've gone backwards this week.

So, I've changed tactics. Although I wake up spontaneously after a dream, I've gone back to using an alarm. That way I can wake up after 2-3 hours and move around for a bit and that should help (multiple WBTB's I suppose) Also, although I'm working well on ADA etc... maybe it's too well (my brains even more wrinkled than most of yours and it might be feeling overwhelmed)

So it's back to basics. Some ADA and definitely some recall and more pre-bed preparation first thing at night and during WBTB's (read a bit of Deberge maybe and run through a plan (keeping it simple and straight to the point) We'll see.

Nothing from the first quarter so I did a WBTB at 6.00

7.00
I'm in a zoo somewhere and it's dark (can't see an animal anywhere so why did I assume it was a zoo?) Some youths are running around and I sense that they're up to no good so I keep out of the way. Then I'm suddenly on a boat.

It's apparently a Nile cruise boat? We're passing large vessels and moving quite fast...dangerously even. the captain executes a reckless turning manoeuvre and we seem to be heading back.

I heard someone say "Look at those huge ships" and suddenly we're moving down a busy main road in a city centre with not a drop of water in sight..

...and the seduction? It's that strumpet Fiona WILD...I can't resist her. It's getting now that I only have to lay awake for more than 10 minutes and I start to get SP in my hands and arms. I know by now that it's a false ride but I actually started getting flashes of blue colour (rather than the usual forest-green). I swear that, if I ever get a dream scenario pop up it will be in the middle of Sherwood Forest.

So I fell for it...45 minutes later my REM finished and it was "slam thump thank you chump" for me again I'm afraid. Will I ever learn? No I won't...she's such a sexy momma and I'll take what I can get...

On the 24/8 I posted this:

" I started from scratch again 19 days ago. I've logged 22 dreams of varying quality...9 of those in the last 4 days (41%)"

On 25/8 the various sections of my brain held an inter-departmental meeting to vote on a proposal by Ed that I "really need to be taught a lesson" Consequently, after 2 dreams on 25/8 I had no dream record for the next two days...bringing my percentage down. (I tried to calculate the % and my brain hurt so I gave up) Damn you brain departments!

Although it might be moon phases. I've read about the new moon disrupting dreams and I did a short survey last time but couldn't back up the claim.

On the "dreamless days in question (26/8 & 27/8) it was the last day of a new moon and the beginning of a waxing crescent. But I had reasonable dreams on 24/8 and 25/8 (beginning of new moon) so, if it does affect dreams there have to be other factors as well, which either increase or decrease the affect. Of course any truth would mean happy times during a full moon (next one is 9/9)

Anyway.
2 choline - blueberries - strawberries

28/8 Two weedy little dreams
6.15
A benefit office (DS) I'm sitting in an armchair, bored to tears, as the manager (who I knew but worked in an entirely different environment years before) withered on about benefits...not an exciting subject at the best of times. My wife (who was there...well it's a dream isn't it?) said did I know I still had my pyjamas on? I trundled off to rectify the situation.

8.30
In a caravan (again..why?) with some workmates (DS) I vaguely recognized and we were playing with toys (again...why?) to pass the time We were also sleeping sometimes (DS)

Still working at ADA and the other disciplines. Once more into the breach.

An interesting night.

2 choline, blueberries, purple grape juice.

5.30
Fragment. Admiring my thick bronze-coloured hair in a mirror? At my age, even a comb-over is a plus. Got up for a short while, had a small coffee then BTB. It took me a while to go off (it sometimes take a longish time with or without a coffee.)

There followed a long period where I got really strong sensations like I used to have when trying to WILD (I wasn't trying to this time...I just wanted to go to sleep.) I got SP - which I now always ignore and a sensation in my head that I was really going somewhere this time. It went on-and-on building and the tinnitus in my ears really ramped-up.

But as before so many times no colours (except for a touch of green), no dream forming...nothing. I tried visualizing one to no effect...I just really wanted to go to sleep...and eventually I did

7,45
A disturbing dream (I had one like this last year) I was in a classroom and my teacher had popped out somewhere. Some of his gear (coat scarf etc) was on a trolley and it seemed to be possessed and it was rising into the air. Eventually the whole trolley moved across the room and I said to another person "You saw that didn't you?"

He seemed to be in denial and that made me angry. He clearly was trying to expunge it from his mind and i decided to exercise my supernatural powers and flew around the room, then swooped down on him trying to terrify him. The teacher returned and wanted to know what was going on. He clearly didn't believe my explanation either and he seemed to be very patronising with me. So I turned on him and got really violent and I started hitting him very hard.

I've had other dreams about me turning nasty...I think I have a streak of violence locked deep within me ..."monsters from the id" as Morbius said in the film "Forbidden Planet" I don't think it relates to the fact that other people think we're daft with this LD thing...I'm really not that bothered

Maybe the coffee contributed but there's frustration with something...or maybe everything. If I was American I'd be running round with an AK47...because I'm a Brit I'll probably just put a stroppy tweet in my local rag.

I had 2 choline, some purple grape juice, some blueberries & strawberries...Oh! and I binned the partridge's carcase. I'm glad that's all gone...I didn't like it a bit...

Only one dream last night but it was long and vivid and that's reassuring. I awoke a few times but couldn't catch a dream....although there was no sense of departing REM (I'm now getting an increasing amount of the eye effects and slight body tremors I had so clearly before I temporarily quit LD'ing.)

7.30
Long and pretty vivid dream set in a power station (DS) I was appropriately suited and booted and I was tasked with showing a young woman around the station (Why? who cares...I'm not complaining) She was with a party of women and we left her mother and the others and started ascending.

Like most dreams it was ridiculously inaccurate . It involved a vertical climb through a maze of pipework and machinery and I was showing off, climbing with alacrity and shinning through narrow gaps in pipework. On the way down through another section I almost collided with a welder and apoligised.

When I reached the bottom I looked up and saw the young woman climbing back down the "up" section (she'd clearly given up trying the near impossible) Then I lost sight of her and I was looking around trying to find her (mega DS) Eventually I gave up looking and crossed a road to join up with the group of women.

I edged through the crowd and located her mother and asked her where her daughter was "Her? She's gone home" she replied ...and I don't blame her!

Having quit before and lost all dreaming ability I started from scratch again 19 days ago. I've logged 22 dreams of varying quality...9 of those in the last 4 days (41%) I'm waking at night without need of the alarm clock and my sensitivity to the onset of REM cycles is returning fast

I'm working on recall and ADA and I'm feeling optimistic. Whether, once we've LD'd we always carry a residual ability I'm not sure but things are moving much quicker than last time.

I MUST work on "bringing the mind home" to relax. I'm losing too much time trying to get back to sleep.

One small dream Tuesday. I felt ill again, when I woke and the dream wasn't "right there" in front of me...it came back only after laying quietly and patiently.

04.55 AM A "BBC" presenter (who, at first, I thought I recognised, but I didn't really) standing in a studio and looking increasingly confused and uncomfortable (as they sometimes do) as music played increasingly faster???? Is there a hidden message in that Ed?

Last night
3.00 AM Feeling a bit ill...got nothing

4.45 AM Small dream about eating from a platter of seafood (not a great lover of seafood) I was presumably eating something fishy but they looked like small pearl-coloured M&M's

For the past several nights, I've diligently practised memory and awareness but the nights have been disappointing. When I looked out before retiring last night I noticed a full moon. I casually wondered whether that affects dreams and, sure enough, when I Googled this morning, I immediately got this;-

Can't sleep? The full moon could be disturbing your dreams - Life & Style - NZ Herald News

Dream Views is already full of this topic so it's nothing new. It apparently takes aprox 5 nights to go from 95% waxing (looking full) to 95% waning (still looking full) the actual 100% full moon this month is 19th, so tonight should be interesting.

Of course, for that theory to work, my best times would presumably be a new moon. I had my first lucid on the night of 6th Sept ...the optimum new moon was 5th @ 1% and the 6th was 2% (waxing) My second lucid was on the night of the 11th Sept @ 37% (waxing) so that kinda makes a dent in the theory...but the moon's phase goes into my notebook from now on.

I love what you can learn form dream research. When I was whinging (as I do) on a blog called "Maybe I'm border-line epileptic" on 23/6 snoop replied with "It sounds like attention deficit to me, at least the way you've explained it." I Googled it, was slightly miffed, replied a bit tersely and didn't click "like" I now think snoop's right and I apologise and I've clicked "like".

We can be "slightly" dyslexic or autistic or have "slight" attention-deficit. My wife reads books for hours...I read no longer than a few paragraphs. I skim through everything, just picking out something here or there to note or reply to. I start biographies from when they're famous...skipping the early chapters...I have occasionally read a book from the ending and skipped backwards...and I learn ADA, memory etc in bits, skipping from one to the other...never absorbing the whole subject in one go. Here, we learn about ourselves