non-lucid

1) Sitting around a table. Very small portions of food. I complained to the woman sitting next to me and she agreed they were getting smaller. I asked for some more but just got a teaspoon of gravy added to the side of my plate. Bit of a theme here.

2) It was lunch time in a school canteen. The children were all rushing over to get their lunch. I had to serve so moved a serving table around and cleared all the rubbish off the top of it. Continuing the food theme.....

3) I was with a patient and noticed that he was interested in lucid dreaming, congratulated him and told him that I was interested as well but hadn't had a lucid dream yet

Woke lots last night but too tired to write dreams down, so forgot most of them.

A very depressing dream

1) In the lounge of an old stately home with big windows. it was dark and foggy outside, we had to go outside to look for the dog. We were chasing around moorland. Then an old 'friend' appeared who used to bully me at school, he started to make fun of me, he was trying to get me to buy a really tacky loking old mirror with plastic on it I think as a present for someone, and I refused and he made fun of me even more. Then I was in the kitchen of my childhood home, there was a pile of presents on the table, I opened the ones from my mother to me. They were obviously very expensive, I think she had bought them in the shop of the stately home we had just been in. I didn't like them though, then started to feel very depressed and angry with myself that I didn't appreciate her presents. About now I think my parents mentionned that they had booked a weekend away for themselves for Easter and started telling me how marvellous it was, and I was jealous. I thought that killing myself would be the only way out, but decided that I didn't agree with suicide. A half empty plate of food landed on the kitchen table, I asked if dinner was being served, my mother told told me yes and I needed to go and get some, she poured herself another glass of wine and walked off. I went to the dining room, my whole family including grandparents were sitting around the table and had almost finished without even inviting me, there was no plae mat or cutlery in my place. I started to get some food but my brother and a friend had started clearing up and moved everything before I could get much food. I followed them to the kitchen but still couldn't get at the food a they were all crowding around so I gave up.
This was the saddest dream I can ever remember. I woke up feeling very depressed and suicidal, then realised that this was real life and that I am actually quite happy.

1) A triffid plant was eating people in the top floor of a building. Then I was standing ouside the entrance to the building with my wife and children, they decided to go in becasue it was actaully a department store. Then they were showing me pictures of the plant and it was grown every year from seed and produced wonderful fruit and people loved it.

2) I was sitting in the lounge of an old peoples home. We were talking to my grandmother but she was completely demented. There was another man and his son sat talking to another old person. The there were several young people in the corner, not sure where they cam from, but I could tell they were very intelligent, we talked to them. Somehow the subject of playing musical instrumetns came up and someone told my brother to get his trumbone so he went off to get it and everyone else got out their instruments. I felt a bit stupid because I didn't play anything.
Suddenyl we were outside and I saw a very old friend from school ride by on a bike.

3) Vague memory: wanting a nice drink and looking through very old grotty bottles for a drink, lot more to this one, can't remember.

4) In a house, walking between rooms. The outside with my father in law and a friend of his, looking at the back garden, explaining that they couldn't dig any deeper because of all the rubble in the ground. I went to look and remembered that it was like that when I tried and explained how I used a pick axe. Then I realised we were trying to dig a swimming pool and wondered why they hadn't dug where I had marked it out. Then I was having a conversation with his friend and he had trapped me into coming to his house to do some work and was discussing where I would stay. We got onto a train in the back garden just to go one stop, suddenly we were coming back, my wife was chattering and we missed the stop and I got very annoyed with her.

Slept for almost 12 hours. Didn't write anything down when I woke expecting to remember the dreams but of course didn't so only remembered one.

1) Something about one of my children's teachers. She was living in a small one bed flat. I used it to sleep in, then a very old friend of mine turned up and wanted to sleep there. Then the teacher was there, I needed to sleep and she said I could, but her friend was also there and there were only two beds, but she would work something out. All a bit muddled.

No recall, zero, for the last 2 nights.
Had a strange one last night not sure how to classify it!

1) I was talking to my wife in bed, she said something about throwing a pillow (or cushion?) off to the side and it would be strange if it moved on its own. I thought, no, that would be fun because it would be supernatural. Then I was WILDing (in the dream) and it was working I heard really loud noises, quite deafening, and I felt myself vibrating all over. I thought at last! it's working, it's frightnening but it's working, I remembered everything I have been told and tried to think of a dream scene, that didn't work. I went with it for a while and tried to move my dream body to get an OBE, but that didn't work. Then I tried force my eyes open remembering that I should enter a dream that way. I couldn't so I started to panic. I tried to move but realised I was paralysed and the noises and vibrations were getting more intense. I could sense my wife next to me and I could here her talking, and someone else talking the other side of me, I thought my wife must be dreaming as well. Then I force my eyes open and I could see my wife but I still couldn't move and I still had really loud noises happening and I thought this isn't right I'm stuck in some sort of weird state and might never get out of it - it was either a nightmare false awakening or a sleep paralysis that seemed to go on forever. Then I think I woke up properly, it was midnight, and was able to move, it all went silent at last.

2) Finding a seat in a canteen, I moved to another room in the canteen and sat next to an old lady she looked all alone and she was quite angry. Next I was sta at a table for some reason I was handed a sample in a sealed glass jar, I put it down and it smashed. A nurse told me to fix the bottle with sticky tape and it would be fine, so I did.

3) I was moving towards a big gate in a Star Wars type scene. There were storm troopers moving toward me and I was shooting them and I hit a few and they fell.

4) Racing a car around a dirt track

5) In a bank, someone else arrived and was annoyed becasue they wanted to rob the bank and I already had, so they went away.

6) An old childrens playhouse that I was trying to burn. It had a load of other old wood on top of it. It wasn't burning well, so I was trying to put dry tinder under the roof to get it going better. There was someone inside and I just managed to get them out as the fire took. I looked back and the firewood on top still wasn't burning very well. The detail in this dream was very good.

7) In a football stadium, can't remember too much, but I was more concerend about what was happening in the terrace and never looked down becasue I'm not interested in football. In the same dream I was thinking about which girl I fancied as if I was about 18 again, and I was writing down on 2 pages in a book something about myslef, and something about the girl I fancied to compare us, for her I wrote a phrase 'Don't be such a dipstick Charlie Brown', not sure why.

Sitting in classroom with a large window on one side, it's dark and raining outside. Several other people sat in a circle with me and a teacher wandering around. The other people seem like children but also adults at the same time. I was asked to read, looked at the text read something but looked back and it had changed - the teacher pointed out the paragraph I should have read - so I made lots of excuses why I had read it wrong first time and felt a bit stupid.
I looked out of the window and thought that the other students would be out in the rain doing sprt and I was quite jealous and wanted to be out there as well.

1) Sitting in the lounge at my childhood house. I was snoozing in the chair and my children were on the floor, I woke up and realised it was nearly 2am and told the girls it was bedtime. My wife became insanely angry at me for some reason, it was visceral rage at me for telling them they had to go to bed and I couldn't understand it at all. They were going to go to bed in the dining room on the floor, I went to get the room ready with my youngest daughter, I was mumbling that we had to just ignore mummy for now and she would calm down. I saw my youngset daughters sleeping bag lying in one corner. Then I had to pump up a latex cat bed, I told my daughter that it was rubbish but she inssited I had to pump it up. I did and it became the most bizarre looking thing ever and I said there you are it's rubbish!! Then I looked for my eldest daughters bed and couldn't find it. The floor was covered in junk so I cleared a path for her. As I moved a chair I saw our old cat Smudge sitting under a table and he was attacking the chair leg. Then I was outside at night and I could see my eldest daughter high up climbing along something and hitting a power line, I stuck my head out and shouted for her to stop it as it was 1am in the morning. I woke and the clock said exactly 1am.
After this dream I tried to DEILD but really needed the loo so it didn't work, as I drifted in and out of sleep I kept hearing a girl singing, I thought it was my daughter to start with, it sounded really nice but I knew it was a hypnagogic hallucination.

2) On some sort of school trip. I went to bed but got told I had to move. I looked oout over a multi-zstorey car park and knew that was were we were going to have to put our beds, and I was explaining to someone that the cat would find us there and still walk all over us and wake us up. Next I was asleep in bed again and I got pulled out, it was the younger brother of someone who used to bully me badly at school, I thought oh no not again! Next I was in the town, still part of a school trip, I was talking to a woman, can't remember what about. I saw a man on a flying board coming past and he was doing exercises on it, I told her how annoyed I was at people with too much money doing silly exercises on flying boards. Then I was in the main town and there was a big party going on. I was at a street corner and told everyone that i really needed to get to bed now as it was so late, I remember having to cross the road and seeing buses coming towards me. The I was outside the hotel we were staying at on a street corner, I saw a path to the side of me that everyone was using to get into town and felt silly becasue I had taken the long route down the main road.

3) Fragments of another dream: I was watchign a very small car in a carriageway below me. It was full of monsters, they burst out of the car and went towards some high rise biuildings. Next 2 people were going to be executed. They had to put their heads in huge crushers and it would squash them, I watched them being killed without any emotion. I was in a house, again full of monsters that I never saw. I was in someones room he was a giant and he could defned himself against the monsters, I asked if I could escape through a hole in his roof just behind him and set off.

Some relationship issues yesterday so I didn't sleep well last night and poor recall

1) I arrived in Norwich, I think my parents took me there. There were lot of people running, we walked through crowds of runners, I had a bag over my shoulder looked in it and relaised I had forgotten my kit. I was devastated because I had laready run half the marathon and was going to change so I could run the second half. I was was very upset and woke up.

Wrote this up rather late in the day so lost a lot of the memory:

1)Walking along rows of patients in beds. I was trying to arrange some small candles in tubes attached to wires across a patient and trying to get it to sit up and not set fire to the bed. A memory of a psychotic patient that was sent to get me, not in any frightening way, but I can't remember much more about it.

2)A parking spot outside a nightclub and something about children - that's it!

3)A dream about one of my old girlfriends. I remember missing her awfully and knowing she won't come back.

1) On a motorbike, I think I wanted a car so was a bit disappointed, then realised how good it was, fitted a GPS to the handlebar and drove relly fast and it was great.

2) I was performing biliary surgery (not something I do in real life) a nurse was suctionning out loads of fluids and I joked with her about how much there was.

3) I was on call in a hospital and was called out to a patient. Can't remember much about treating the patient. I was walking along a path talking to a nurse and saying it was actually quiet today and we always get called that time of day. Then I was in a canteen sitting at a table. I decided to try to WILD so closed my eyes but it was too noisy I decided it wasn't going to work. I looked at the wall and realised it was a poster about lucid dreaming. The character on the psoter was moving like a film of a lucid dream and I thought 'No! That's not how you lucid dream, he's got it all wrong'. I didn't question whether I was dreaming .

1) Some sort of very long dirve with my children to get some lunch. We had lunch then started driving back. A waitress came up to the side of the car as we were driving with another portion of food. there was a lot more to this dream I wish I could remember it.

2) In some sort of concrete underground structure with our dog. He wandered over to an elevator in the corner and there was a woman there who sent him back to us. Then a very large muscled man came over and was stroking the dog. He suddenly slapped my wife very hard across the arms. I knew I couldn't do anything phyically so shouted 'Do you mind?' and e looked shocked and walked away, my wife didn't seem too bothered.

3) Talking on the phone in a corridor in some sort of college. 4 students raced up and grabbed the phone. I recognised them and knew I had just seen them on TV they were going to take part in some amazing magic event (I read about Paul Daniels dying today). I was excited to see them and was going to ask if I could join in, it was so exciting.

4) An old work colleague had moved to a flat in London opposite the Royal London Hospital. In the background I could see the HEMS helipad. He was building his own helipad to fly his light aircraft from. He was telling me how his wife had messed up his tunnel to the pad and it was downstairs, he really wanted to come out in the bright sunlight. I looked around his helipad, it looked good I could see all the detail of the metalwork holding the safety netting around the edge. He was talking to me and I decided I needed some cups of tea, I poured the first 2 into cups then the next one into a cat basket, and the next into something else soft - they soaked up all the tea so I decided it wasn't the best idea.

1) Sitting with a group of parents, I think it's parent's evening at school, and I'm asked to talk about my career. I think it's a bit silly and irrelevant but start talking. I explain that I decided to repair hernias during the time I was doing my research project (I have never done a surgical hernia repair in my life, or a research project), I explain how it did it in my free time and how important it was for me, I think I was being a bit big headed.

2) Looking at a map deciding what route I was going to walk, it's a circular route, and I will be walking half the distance on the road, half off-road. This dream s a bit 'misty'. I'm stood by a car in the road at the start of the walk, I can't remember much else.

3) In a large low roofed wooden building. I could see lots of men having showers through openings in the building. The there was no-one there and it became strangely empty.

4) I was walking down a corridor at my very first place of work carrying lots of folders and bits of paper. Someone is moving office and I wait while a team of men carry a desk and lots of cardboard boxes down the corridor, I see people start to unpack the boxes and hear someone explain why it's so important to pack small items in cardboard boxes. Then I meet my bext friend sitting in front of a computer screen and I am starting to explain to him that you can use his computer system to do every thing mycomputer system does to enter patient consultations. He goes off to get something but I just can't work out how to access his computer. He comes back and I explain how much I would enjoy a hot chocolate right now. He points out the correct box to click on the computer and everything works.

1) I was onboard a ship and it was going down, water swiiling around the floor. I was in a stairwell with a man who was lying on the ceiling and he told me that he was going to go down with the ship, I told him that I didn't want to drown and was going to find an escape. Then I was with my wife walking through a sliding door into the boat and past a check in desk, we walked a bit further and were told that there was no door or check in desk where we were. We retraced our steps into an old lounge and we found an old sealed up door and realised that we had travelled through time. We were in this big lounge looking at people sitting on sofas, then saw that there was a lot of workmen doing things and realised that it was a re-fit between voyages. I watched a man repairing telephones, then he drilled hole through a book for some reason, and I watched him clean out his drill bit. There was a large fire and my wife had laid it up, for some reason I was a bit irritated at how she had used the wood, becasue I knew there was none left. I lit the fire. For some reason I then saw a magazine in the fire that I wanted and pulled it out. My father was watching and he asked me what I was doing so I explained to him.

2) This part of the dream feels as if it occurred at some point during the previous dream as a side story. I had won a competition to fly to the moon. I was with an Apollo mission, every one was very nice and matter of fact. They suited me up, which I loved, and handed me the oxygen supply unit, then we were on the moon and I walked around in my spacesuit. When I was back in the dream above I was thinking that no-one there knew that I was one of the few people to have ever walked on the moon, I was so proud.

3) I had to get straight out of bed when I woke in the morning and totally forgot all of a another big dream, it won't come back to me now.

1) Disjointed memories of this dream. I'm on holiday, it's time to go home. Looking over some water at the airport, I explain that I have to go there to pick up a metal goalpost that I stored there so I can take it home, and I won't be long. Then I'm in an airport. We are standing in a queue waiting to get through security, there are 2 women security officers frisking everyone as they come through. It's my turn and some people push past, they are dealt with swiftly by the security officers and go to the back of the queue. I'm inside the airport. I look at some car keys and realise I have to return the hire car, and realise we only used it once. I'm looking around for the hire car desk. There is 3 people palying guitar on some of the airport seats. I get told where to go to hand in the keys I go out through sliding doors. Then I'm in a hangar to pick up he goalposts, but now it's actually a hanglider - I see it hanging up and look at it, it is very cheap and flimsy but it was just something I bought on holiday, I look at the suitcase it fits in and think about folding it up as I want to take it home but decide it's too big. Next I'm wandering though more airport lounges, someone I know sees me and comes over to talk to me, then I see another couple of people I know. I think the dream ended here.

2) I'm in a GP surgery. I'm walking towards the stairs for some reason feeling like a failure, then I think about a nursing home that actually asked for me to become their GP and convince myself that I'm not that bad after all. I'm walking up the stairs adn another doctor passes me. next I'm in a meeting and someone is goign to give a talk, he is using a projector and is going to start. A female GP leans over towards me and says that he alwys runs over and asks if I'm in a hurry, I say that I am so she promises she will interrupt him when time is up so I can leave on time.

Little fragments:

- Being made to feel very insignificant by my wife, then yelling at her and feeling bad.
- In a queue of people going into a shop, I tried to help my wife up some steps but she just brushed me off and told me to leave alone, I felt awful.
- Running up a steep path with a friend from many years ago, I playfully raced him, he seemed very angry with me and walked off.

- Somthing to do with skiing, looking a brochure