Timothy Paradox

I've been noticing dreams in which I 'think' I am sleepwalking, but am not. It's hard to explain (as usual), but I think I am walking around in reality, but I know my eyes are closed but I can still see. But I think what I'm seeing is reality (as if I can see through my closed eyelids), not just a dream.

The other night I had such an experience, where I thought I'd woken up. My laptop was still turned on and next to me on the bed (sometimes I play ASMR videos as I fall asleep), and I reached over and clicked 'x' to close the tab. Then, I thought I woken up again, for real this time, and I'd reached over and clicked for real, except I missed the 'x' for closing the tab and clicked somewhere in the middle of the screen.

Now I think I might be 'misremembering' these events, and perhaps the dreams never matched reality at all, and it was a double false awakening.

I dreamt I was going through a city, floating on top of some kind of ball (like one of those large balls you use for working out. I just lay on top of the ball, which hovered despite being filled with air. I even thought it would work better if it was helium. Anyway... I practiced maneuvering and turning, and thought it was good practice for my flying dreams, where I often have trouble turning... Ironic! After a while I arrived at my destination (a train station?). I got off the ball, and noticed the "event" was just starting. There was a countdown which ended just as a walked in, and I thought to myself "right on time".

I was awake, but decided to close my eyes a bit more as I was still really tired. In the darkness behind my eyelids, I saw a line. I focused on it, and more lines appeared, and formed a shape. It looked like a watch, or no - a compass. Four lines, arrows - one in every direction. Detail increased, and now I saw it was beautifully adorned with all manner of embellishments. Then I saw what looked like text... but it was outside of the compass. I now saw the compass was a drawing written on the right page of an old book. I could read the text - it was in Dutch, but I can't remember what it said. I was distracted by something in real life, and briefly opened my eyes. I lost the vision right there and then, and was unable to continue when I closed my eyes again.

Another "back to high school" dream. I hate these so much. I remember it was 8 in the morning and it as time to leave for school, but then I thought perhaps I didn't *have* to, as I knew I'm 28 years old... I think I magically lived back with my dad at our old house.

Why is my mind permanently stuck in 2008?

I basically dreamt the plot of a full episode of Heroes, basically the first episode of a new season of the canceled 'Reborn' series from 2015. It focused on the father of Nathan and Malina, and showed a bit of his origin story. Most of it took place in Italy, 2006. His name was Pierre Gasly, which also happens to be the name of a Formula One driver (a racing series I follow religiously). He was in Italy with his wife/girlfriend, who eventually turned on him and became the villain of the story. The story started with some comic-book style narration (some of the scenes literally played out in front of me as pages of a 9th Wonders comic book), in which he spoke about his powers (it was implied he was ludicrously powerful) and said how his mother always said he was special. Anyway... the evil girlfriend was eventually defeated. I saw the next scene through the eyes of Pierre, where he approached Angela Petrelli, who was sitting on a bench just outside the Italian village. She showed him a 9th Wonders comic, featuring the exact scenes I just witnessed earlier in the dream. There was also a scene with Claire Bennet, who was apparently on vacation (with her folks) to Italy in 2006.

After waking, I decided to close my eyes some more. I immediately got hypnagogic 'flashes', like a dream while being awake. I saw two kids, no older than 8, walking along a waterfront promenade. I knew a certain event would happen and they would fall in the water and (presumably) drown. I decided to watch, and see if 'destiny' would really happen. It did. Like clockwork, right when they were supposed to, the kids smashed through the low wall (!!!) separating them from the water, and fell into said water. I decided I couldn't just stand there and let it happen, and decided to jump in and save them. I was half awake at this point and it felt like I was controlling every aspect of that dream, not just my own actions.

I dreamt an entire episode of a show I invented myself, right there in that dream. I don't recall anything about it, other than that the plot appeared to make sense.

Met my old friends again, which I will call F and B. Or at least I considered them friends... Until for some reason they started hating me, the reasons mostly political. As the world grew more polarized, so did we. I'm a rationalist and centrist (from my point of view, I know), they were very much on the far-left of the spectrum. It didn't work.

So I met them again somewhere, and F talked about his time in university (which was ages ago in real life). He said they "at least banged the (forgot subject) teacher before the end of the year". I was a little... surprised he would speak of such explicit things, but I just said "really, cool!" or something like that. Then he said it was more of a gangbang, and the teacher was a dude. This really surprised me, as I realized this meant he was gay - a fact I didn't know about him. I don't recall what I said (it was a rhetorical question, out of surprise, not negative judgement), but he instantly interpreted as if I was being homophobic (they have always seen me as a Nazi, just for not buying into their radical leftist ideas) and offensive. The disgust on his face... summarized exactly how I feel my former friends feel about me. Clearly, I'm not over it. Then the other 'friend', B, suggested I was an antisemitist. Not sure how the conversation went that way. I defended myself and said I wasn't... because I'm not, the suggestion is ludicrous. He dismissed my defense, with that same look of disgust as the other friend from before. They hated me... for being something I am not! If only they could see through my eyes, or look into my mind, and see I am none of the things they think I am. Anyway, he pulled out his phone, opened Facebook and showed a comment I made on a picture as evidence of my "antisemitism". It was a pro-Israel post condemning atrocities committed against them. Despising hypocrisy, I replied something sarcastic, reminding them of how the atrocities they are committing themselves (in Palestine, presumably). And that was, from B's point of view, evidence I was a Jew-hating Nazi.

I felt miserable when I woke up. The world has gone insane. Or is it just me who has gone insane?

Should not have watched scenes of this movie, haha! I was in a gun battle with several other people. Two men were shooting at each other, and I was firing my pistol at one of them (he had his back to me). He had a health bar. He was down to 9% health, and my hits (I was definitely hitting him) did no damage, so I suspected "hax". Then at one point two more people attacked me from the left. I grabbed a shotgun and fired on them, but probably missed. Also typical, I found it very hard to pull the trigger of my pistol. This *always* happens in my gun dreams. Triggers are impossible to pull. I didn't get killed, but woke up nevertheless. Let's call it a draw?

I'm in a room with a bunch of other people. We're the German resistance, rebelling against the current German government (present day). Much to my surprise, my grandmother (deceased since 2009, she was a Nazi and fled Germany when the Soviet army invaded from the east) was also a part of the resistance. But then, the government (presumably) sent in a T-1000 (Terminator 2) to hunt us down. We scattered and ran in various directions. We were now in an industrial area, resembling the kind of chemical plant I used to work at. I sprinted as fast as I could which admittedly wasn't fast. Then, I suddenly "remembered" I could fly. I just felt I could. I took off, and flew away from the industrial area, over the river where it was located. I was afraid I might lose altitude and fall in the water, as I hated getting wet, feared drowning and knew I could never take off again from the water. I reached the opposite shore, where there was a city. I was at the waterfront, and saw a man and a woman at a bench. The man was doing magic tricks, though I saw no audience. I was just hovering two feet above the ground instead of walking, and showed it to him saying "I can do magic too!". He did not look impressed, and waved his hand underneath me, thinking there would be a wire or some kind of other object supporting me. But when he saw there was nothing, he realized I was hovering for real. They both looked flabbergasted no. I said I could fly, too. I found it hard to take off from a level surface, so I jumped off the waterfront path (into the water). I flew, and gained some altitude. People were watching now, and to be honest I was being vain and I enjoyed the attention. I did some more stuff like fly up and walk across a building' walls horizontally (briefly).

In a later scene, I was in a supermarket. I met a former colleague (Gaspard). I greeted him and we chatted a bit.

I wrote down, but don't recall what it means: "no fate but what we make" (I watched Terminator earlier that day) and Ian McKellen. I think Ian said the famous Terminator line as part of a speech to 'us'. Us probably refers to several characters I met in the dreams I'll now summarize (they're all related, same 'continuity').

I was doing some kind of basketball challenge. I had to dribble my way through a kind of trench (?), maneuvering my way past several opponents. Not willing to give up, I somehow outdid myself, and made it to the end. That would never work in real life.

I remember being in a hotel, and getting into a dumbwaiter in the kitchen. It went up, and I ended up between the corpses in a morgue...

Notes mention Rick Moranis, don't recall the scene.

Throughout the previous dreams (of which I forgot key scenes), a team had been assembled of random people I met in those dreams. Like the "Guardians of the Galaxy", but even bigger losers. One of them was a waiter from that hotel, perhaps Moranis was another. And me, of course - the basketball guy. We all traveled in a cool-looking spaceship. We flew through a kind of wormhole, into a dark planet's atmosphere.

--

First dream completely unrelated to the first bunch. I was at Santa Monica Beach, and I was wearing absolutely ridiculous clothing. A bloody skirt? Pink, no less? I was understandably embarrassed. I didn't want to be seen. I started flying to stay out of sight. I was having fun, so the clothes thing kind of vanished (if you don't focus on it, the dream makes it vanish) as it ceased to be relevant. Flying low through a street, a guy suddenly turned to me and asked something really weird. I think he asked me to record something on tape...? I kept flying, but everywhere I looked, there he was... asking the same question over and over again, in exactly the same tone. I flew higher to get away, but when I looked back (down), there he was! Somehow right behind me in mid-air, asking that question again! I was seriously freaked out at this point. I violently threw him off of me, and he fell down. I somehow had an injury in my side all of a sudden? I woke up, and for some reason immediately checked my body for the injury. Not sure why I did that.

Right before I opened my eyes, I had a vision of a number. 12:14 (in green numerals). I finally woke up, and checked the time. It was 12:14...

Shortly before I woke up, I saw a number. 12:14. My vision was black (dreams had ended, I was in the process of waking up), and this was the last image I saw before I opened my eyes.

I looked sideways at the clock, and it was 12:14.

I still don't know if:

1) I imagined it, 'fake memories'?
2) A complete coincidence happened.
3) I've seen traces of a poorly understood mechanism in the human psyche, perhaps this 'human clock' thing that allows people to wake up a minute before their alarm clock goes off?

Edit, July 2018. I had another one. Shortly before waking, I saw a wristwatch showing the time. When I opened my eyes, the time on my laptop matched the time on the dream watch perfectly.

Another dream in which I have to go back to high school... it never ends. This time though, it didn't feel like a nightmare. I felt okay with it.
I also recall having a heartfelt conversation with one of my former bullies, Max. That was nice.

Awful dream. I was holding a kitten in one hand. I wanted to cause myself emotional pain by hurting the innocent, and losing my own innocence in the process. I wanted to do something awful, knowing it would hurt me. I repeatedly stabbed the little kitten with a knife...

I was swimming in an outdoor pool. I was doing crawl, and going ludicrously fast. I'd lost track of the time, night had fallen. Someone looked at me with a look that said "you're still here"? Everybody else had already left quite a while ago.

I remember diving in this pool, and it was impossibly deep. Like the closet leading to Narnia, this pool was at least a hundred feet deep, had rocks and algae in it, and had all sorts of fish in it... even some extremely large species the size of whales... it was actually kind of creepy, in the typical way deep water always scares me. The unknown, not knowing what's lurking in the dark beneath you. You could not see the bottom of this pool, and large beasts lurked everywhere.

I got out of the pool at the end, and walked over to (presumably) my towel to dry myself.

Boatload of dreams this night, a lot of it XXX-rated so expect to see a lot of "redacted". We start with a fully redacted sex dream featuring REDACTED.

I'm held captive in a room up high in a skyscraper. I remember seeing a painting (?) and thinking the bad guys are the developers of the game "Hitman". Random, I know... The jail had bars that somehow "rotate" (hard to explain) which makes it impossible to break out. A jail guard sees me move and assumes I wanted to escape, so he comes in and installs an additional neck restraint which secures my neck to the wall. At some point I escape anyway, and jump through a window and fall down. But I somehow knew I'd be fine. The skyscraper looks quite futuristic.

In this dream I was flying outdoors, using a poncho I was wearing as a cape that helped me fly (it generated lift, somehow). I landed, and continue a previous plot by talking to a Spanish girl (something about her high-heeled shoes?).

Zombies attacked our old house. I was in the garden with my mom. I tried to fight, but my guns would not fire (I couldn't pull the trigger, typical in scary dreams), so I had to resort to using an improvised melee weapon.

I remember REDACTED & a T-Rex, and I saw in first person from her perspective how it bit her, holding her in its maw (still on the ground). Her sight went black, and I saw her body on the ground with a bite taken out of it.

I was watching TV, watching REDACTED by dinosaurs and giant wurms (like the ones from 2005's King Kong). REDACTED, thinking my dad and his wife Debby (who were in front of me, also watching the movie) wouldn't notice. I asked them what these wurm-things were. My dad simply said (in that typical tone): "Could you stop that, please". I knew he knew REDACTED." I simply replied "I'm not doing anything".

I remember a scene in which I recalled I'd forgotten my bicycle somewhere in southern France... I figured I should leave it there, as the cost of retrieving it would be higher than the price of the actual bike.

Dream that started in a gym and has way too many small random details, I will not bother to even *try* writing this all down. REDACTED on catwalks above the ground, waiting for them to start fighting (and REDACTED), but it doesn't happen.

I was at a kind of get-together of people I've met throughout my life so far. My grandfather (recently deceased), dad and some ex-colleagues were there.
The dream was partially lucid. I told my grandpa I loved him. Something I was too chickensh*t to do in real life, and will pay for with an eternity of guilt.
As I woke up, I could still hear the dream's soundtrack, which fit the mood perfectly.

Dream in which I met, and had a crush on Winona Ryder. I think I even got to kiss her.

I was with two girls. They were both attractive, but I liked the blonde the most. We were in a "fight club" situation or sorts... we were fighting for fun, and decided no one should hold back. It felt liberating, being able to unleash all that pent-up aggression on a willing adversary. Temporary freedom from the drug that is 'civilization'. I thought to myself that I wanted to get to know the blonde girl better, once we were done beating the crap out of each other.

Not sure I want to go into too much detail here. I was 'busy' with a cute black prostitute. My brother was nearby. Yeah.

It was night and I was on a bus, right behind the driver. The driver was completely nuts, and rammed several cars off the road. After a bridge, I got off the bus, and realized I should flee, as I heard the police coming. I sneaked away and started running as fast as I could. I could feel gravity decreasing, so I naturally took to the sky and started flying. The whole world felt like it took place on a circular artificial floating island. I was running on the outer "edge" of the platform. Beyond that were more buildings, and then the ocean.