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    False Awakening

    1. The Neighbor's House

      by , 02-15-2013 at 04:37 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      Woke up at 4AM to WBTB Moved to recliner SSILD - No Aids

      #131 - The Neighbor's House -DEILD 5:01AM

      I wake up from a NLD. Have a really hard remembering the dream. A part of me thinks that I woke up here in a lucid FA. I am not sure. I move a little and get comfortable. The I decide to just forget the dream and DEILD. I get the vibrations almost immediately. It comes slow at first and then gains intensity. I have to admit and I am really excited at this point and I know this stage can make or break the LD. Instead of trying to visualize a place or scene, I go for a OBE style LD and hurriedly get out of the recliner and rush outside. I felt a little sluggish at first but the transition was pretty smooth.

      I go into the yard and for some reason look in the sky. I think its real life habit coming out. The sky is dimly lit and cloudy. The clouds look like gray and black marble. I find it really pretty and admire it for a while. The only problem is that I seem to look moving my head wildly back and forth and not able to hold still.

      I look at the ground to stabilize. I realize I didn't think of a goal before hand. (I was so unprepared for this LD) I had to really rack my brain to think of a TOTM. I remember flower and start searching the grass. I pluck a piece of grass and start to will it to be a flower. Then I remember that one is already done. I think really hard. I remember the clock but I am outside and don't feel like looking for a clock. Erase major element! I realize that I had wondered over towards the neighbor's yard so I started looking around for something to erase. I wasn't about to mess with my own stuff! I see his red car. Not enough. I see the houses across the street. Too much. I look back at the neighbors house. Ha! Ill erase his house! Then, I notice the dream world getting darker except for the house. The color seems way to bright and vivid like bad Technicolor. A car passes behind me and for a brief moment everything is lit up and normal. I don't want to fall to darkness so I ask the dream for light. I look and and yell "Lights! I need lights here please." I notice how strange my voice sounds hollow and echoes. Nothing happens so I try again. I clap at the sky and yell "LIGHTS!" The sensation on my hand is strange. Still nothing so I give up.I focus on my neighbors house once again. I put a hand up over my line of sight so that it looks like I have my hand above it. The idea was to just wipe the house away like and eraser on a chalkboard. At that moment the world goes completely dark. I think I am waking up. I forget all of my void/DEILD tricks and give up on the dream. After a few seconds I am fooled by a FA


      I wake up and notice thats its late morning and the light from the windows is bright. I notice how my dream clock is usually close to waking time. I guess I was off this time. (Doh! I missed that one!) I see a pile of cat vomit on the floor and it looks like cornbread stuffing. I see Stella, my cat, is next to it. I am so pissed that I slap her head. She is not phased by it. I backhand her in the head really hard but she just looks at me. I find this really odd but don't think it through (missed another one ) I see some familiar DC in the kitchen cleaning. I start bitching about the cats and go help clean. I wake up.

      Updated 02-15-2013 at 07:18 PM by 5967 (Typed on my phone.)

      Tags: deild, neighbors, obe
      Categories
      lucid , false awakening , task of the month
    2. FA's Brief Lucids and one Hellacious DEILD chain

      by , 01-27-2013 at 04:51 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      pre-bed 9:00PM
      2000MG Fish oil - (some posts suggest better dreaming)
      100MG 5-HTP
      Bed 10:00PM
      WBTB alarm 2:30AM but I woke naturally at 2:19AM
      2ish MG Galantamine (poured half capsule out on a dish and just licked it off. )
      250MG Choline
      600MG GPC
      0.5MG Melatonin

      INSOMNIA!

      +1MG Melatonin at 3:00AM
      +2MG Melatonin at 3:30AM

      Dosed off a bit brief DILD that I can't now remember. It was a crap dream anyway.
      Short WILD with vivid Rainbow colored static and geometric shapes. I haven't tripped that hard since High School!

      Finally fell asleep
      I woke up about 5:30AM from a NON-lucid. Something about me and another man playing with our sons. We have Lord of the Rings action figures and bicycles. Aragorn against a goblin, orcs, some shrimp like creature, and Uruk-hai. The funny thing is the action figures were actually talking to each other.

      #125 FA's Brief Lucids and one Hellacious DEILD chain

      I don't know how long this entire dream segment was. I feel it was probably around 30min. Maybe longer. I am not sure. There are a few memory gaps in the beginning but this is the best I remember.

      Ex in-laws
      I am staying at my ex in-law's house. My ex wife does not exist. My current wife and my ex's brother brother is there. There was some long dialog. Something about his birthday party. I sit and listen to the convo. I go into deep thought like I usually do. I feel dislike for this guy (I never liked him IRL). I think about why I am even here. I remember that I dream this a lot.

      I remember some SP but my focus was low


      Downtown event
      I have a FA. My wife and I are leaving the ex in-law's house. First we were driving now we are walking. My wife tells me that her "brother" R is going to give an anniversary surprise during his birthday party. I feel disgusted and want no part of it but say nothing.

      It is really early in the morning and still dark. It looks like we are downtown Webb City. There are a few curbside bistros open and large groups of people are flocking to them. Most of them are nicely dressed in evening dresses and suits. As we are walking through I comment on this to my wife but decide there must be some event going on and these are famous places to eat. Anthony Bourdain comes to mind.

      I sit in a folding chair next to some woman in a black evening dress. I look around and notice my wife went into a building. I just *know* that she had to use the restroom. This woman looks familiar to me but I don't know her. I felt an indescribably strong connection to her. Like a close friend or a family member. She is older with shoulder length gray hair. She is well kept and beautiful for her age. I get the feeling that she is ultra rich and well known. In spite of that, she is super friendly and down to earth. We have a really long conversation. I forgot almost all of it. I can only remember telling her that I was really confused. I told her that I had a brief lucid dream and I just woke up. I told her I wasn't sure what was going on. I felt really sleepy still. I don't remember her reply if any.

      I start missing my wife and look behind me. I see a bunch of folding chairs set out full of people and a woman at a podium. My wife is taking a seat in the middle. The woman at the podium says something about a church service. I feel annoyed. I just woke up. I am tired and I am in no mood to sit through some church service in the middle of the street. I march over to my wife. I sit beside my wife, put a hard hand on her shoulder and ruffly whisper in her ear, "What is this bullshit!?" The woman turns to look at me. It is some blond woman. She looks shocked an a little scared. I feel extremely embarrassed. "OH! Um sorry. I thought you were..."

      I run off to find my wife. The shock of this triggers lucidity. I remember that I took G and was trying to get lucid.

      I am in bed with vibrations.


      Memory gap

      I have another brief FA to lucid here but I can't remember enough to record anything.


      Blanket Attack

      I am back in bed with vibrations. This time I feel like a retard. I very quickly remember the dreams and how I was so close. Now I am more focused and determined.

      I transition out of bed but I am unstable. The blanket suck to my head and I can't see any more. I try to fight it but my hands can't feel anything. I give up and turn to leave blind. I am thrown back into SP.

      DEILD

      The Colosseum - Another failed attempt at TOTY

      I transition out again. This time it is better. But I am blind. I feel my way out of the bedroom. I try opening my eyes for a bit but I realize that I keep opening my real eyes. I see the dream and see the waking world. Finally I stop and focus seeing through my eye lids. Now I can dimly see. This time instead of heading to the front door I wonder what the back door will be like. My vision improves once I reach the back door and have a hand on the door knob. I try to visualize a Colosseum. I think of the line I used last time. I open the door but I see a moon lit back yard. I close the door and try again. Still the same. Not wanting to push my luck and wake up I walk out side. At this point part of me wonders If I am sleep walking. As a RC I try to float. I see me feet lift off the upper level of the back deck. Yep it's a dream. Now, I uncontrollably float over the rest of the deck and do a nose dive into the ground. I flip and roll end over end. Undaunted, I get up and brush myself off. (Brush myself off? lol) It is still really dark so I look up and ask the dream, "I need some light here" Oops I forgot to be polite. "Please." Nothing happens. "Can I please have some light?" I look around sort of wildly. I see a full moon and some stars. I try to focus on the moon but it is like looking through unfocused binoculars. It is really unstable and blurry. I look to the east and see the sun is just beginning to light up the sky.

      Encouraged, I decide to fly to Rome. I "feel" like Rome is to the east. My flying stinks but I remember a trick I learned from Robert W.'s book. I see the closest tall tree and focus on the tip. I go into warp speed. I see the small focused point of the tree but my peripheral vision is a blurry mess. I sort of lose vision for a sec but feel the tree branches smack into me. I blindly grasp and feel something small thorny branches. There is a dull pain but I don't dare let go. I see another tree in the distance. I repeat the exact same thing.

      Will.i.am is now 18!-tree.jpgWill.i.am is now 18!-mountain-warp.jpg

      I look farther out. I see a tree covered mountain range. The sun is rising behind it. The mountains look really far away. They are small and on the horizon. I pick a spot with trees and focus. I fly/teleport. Again, I grasp branches and hold on. I lose vision briefly again. I think that this has to be far enough.I let go and drop to the ground. I land hard.

      I pick myself up off the ground and notice the sky is dark again. I try to imagine the Colosseum again. A huge spot light comes on be. I begin to hear a roaring crowd chanting something. I think, This is it! I pretend I have a sword sheathed on my left side. With my right arm I make a drawing motion. I can hear it come out but I feel nothing. All I can see is my shadow on the ground in front of me. I am a bulky muscular man with a Gladius in my right hand. I am in a fighting stance and ready for battle. At that moment the dream collapses.


      Haunted?

      DEILD back into bed. This time I give the SP a little more time. I focus on the feeling and relax. I just wait and watch like I do when I have HI.

      I begin to see a bright blue blob of color. I focus on it. It looks like some sort of animation on a computer screne. I sit up and reach for it. It becomes a tablet in my left hand. I continue to watch the strange blob. I ask the the dream, "What is this?"
      I hear a reply in my mind, "EVIL..... THIS HOUSE IS HAUNTED."
      I become afraid. I shout. "YOU FAGGOT! SHUT-UP! NO IT'S NOT!" (faggot? really? Sorry folks, I never use that word IRL) Then I realize that I pretty much just called myself a faggot. I think about stupid it was. The dream collapses.


      The Creep In The Mirror

      I DEILD again and remain calm. I sit in SP again. I am beginning to realize that if I give SP some time and not rush things I will be able to see better. After some time I can see the room. I get out of bed. This time I try to focus on using the bathroom door to teleport to the Colosseum. It is the closest door. I remember the non-lucid awhile back that when I opened the door it led to a park outside. I try to visualize the outline of wall again. I open the door. Nope. Normal bathroom. I try again and the room is a black void. I feel encouraged and walk in. I imagine a Gladius in my hand and try my WILD tech in dream. I make a repetitive chopping action with the sword and wait for the Colosseum to form.

      Suddenly the lights come on. I am just in my bathroom. I can see the sun coming from the window. The light is bright and warm like noon in the summer. I decide to just play around now.

      I go to the sink and look in the mirror. I notice the medicine cabinet is all wrong. It has a sliding glass door rather than a hinged one. I look really creepy and distorted. My body is all jittery and wavy like I an underwater. I focus on my face. My eyes look bloodshot. My goatee is gone and I look like I am 16 again. I gasp and let out a laugh. When I do that there is this strange zooming focus effect in the mirror with the background behind me. I am taken aback. I focus again on my face. I am making crazy faces at myself. I am still wavy and jittery. My reflection give me a half smirk. It looks like someone is photo editing my mouth in real time with a smudge tool. I realize I am not smiling. Then I notice that I have a black, smoky aura around me. I gasp and again the strange zooming effect. It was almost like reality bent and flexed around me. I focus on my face once more and it looks sort of normal. I feel really creeped out and decide to move on.



      I think about going outside so I look out the window. I pull back the blinds but find that I can't see past the screen. Its just really bright light coming in. I decide to head to the front door.

      I walk through into my son's room. And become distracted. I see him asleep in the crib. I lean over him and say "BOOOO!" He makes a face and puts his hands to his mouth. He looks like he is about to cry. I feel really bad that I scared him. I try to comfort him and kiss is forehead. Then I wonder if I am really astral projecting and worry that I am waking him up. Then I get an idea.

      I rush back into my bed room to try and see myself. I go back through the bathroom. There is breif darkness. Then I an standing next to my bed in the dark. My wife wakes up and half-way sits up. I see my body lying in bed in my right side with my legs slightly bent. I notice that MY HEAD IS MISSING. I jump in the bed next to me. It feels like a plastic dummy. It has a shirt and shorts on. I reach into the neck of the shirt but it feels like smooth skin. I remember the headless boy dream the scene destabilizes.


      Concentration is Lost

      I begin to DEILD again. I feel the vibrations buzzing my body. This time I become distracted. I realize that have had a long dream. I feel like I am going to forget is all. I try to think back while keeping the SP going but this much thinking fully wakes me up.

      The time is exactly 7:00AM. I feel a little confused because the room is so dark still. I swear to myself that I am still dreaming but after several clock RCs and awareness checks I quickly realize I am not. It is just cloudy outside.

      Updated 03-30-2013 at 10:43 PM by 5967 (Details...)

      Categories
      lucid , false awakening , memorable , task of the year
    3. Lucid #95 Lucid Precog Attempt #1

      by , 11-15-2012 at 03:59 AM (Xanous' Dream Journal)


      Thoughts | Non-Lucid | Lucid | Techniques/Aids

      Bedtime 9PM-6PM
      Apple Juice at bedtime, SSILD Tweaked, Multiple wakenings focused on DEILD/SSILD


      Brats Around 4AM

      I am taking care of someones kids. I am in a bed room with them and trying to get them to sleep. There are 2 bunk beds in the room. A little boy is on one and there is a window unit next to him. I have a little girls in my bed with me. I think that she was scared. The kids keep talking and I get pissed. I just want to sleep. The boy keeps messing with the AC he says hes hot and its not working. I feel cool and not hot and the AC sounds fine. I threaten to spank both of them. I don't care what the parents think. The girl gets up and goes to the boy. I spank her and she runs out of the room. I look into the living room and see my infant son playing xbox with another infant. I say well they're up I guess I wont sleep at all.

      I lay still on awakening and wait to DEILD. Nothing happens at first so I give SSILD a shot before I reach for my DJ

      Lucid #95 Lucid Precog Attempt #1
      After a short time I start to feel some vibrations. I notice I can still move my hands. I test this by trying to move my hands slightly. I feel them twitch. So I wait. The vibrations get weak so I roll my eyes to the back of my head. That seems to work. I open my eye for some reason and see the room. I am sure it was my real eyes and I close them. The vibrations get weak again.

      Then I feel a person spooning my backside. I am lying on my right side. The first thing I think is OpheliaBlue's demon is here to torment me. I was scared at first but then I blew it off and told myself it wasn't real and to ignore it. As soon as I did that it left but as it left I felt a finger go down my spine. Instead of getting chills it strenthens the vibrations. I imagine a finger going down my spin over and over until the vibrations get full strenghth and I can hear the usual sounds really loud.

      Now it's time to exit. I imagine my feet going over the side of the bed and touching the floor. As soon as my feet touch the floor I find myself standing in my bedroom looking at the door.

      I try to open the door. I feel the doorknob clearly and I can hear the click as I turn it. The strange thing is a phantom door opens leaving the original door untouched. I smile at this is amusement. I open it again and again with the same result. Then I slowly and can carefully open the door. I see the opening now and light in the dining room. I carefully put my other hand in and get a good grip. Then I fling it open and step through.

      I am already thinking about my lucid task. In rl I blindly picked a red backed playing card and put it face down on the bookcase by the door. I want to look at it in the dream to see how actuate I can be.

      I look but both the bookcases are gone. There are some cards scattered on the floor but the look like paint samples. I squat down and pick them up and stare them over like a nearsighted Magoo. My vision get a little blurry and I have a hard time seeing. The card start to look like candyland cards. I think maybe I can summon the card. So I use expectation and reach behind my back into my waste line. I pretend that I have it tucked in there. I just feel my underwear band and nothing else. I pull my hand in front of me and it is empty. I am still thinking it looks like paint samples. I look up and the wall looks like it has just been painted yellow and the hardwood looks freshly refinished. I wonder if the bookcases were moved for the remolding.

      I try expectation again and look in the kitchen and find the bookcases. There is nothing on it but a blue backed card. The card is square but I look at it anyway. I pick it up and its feels like thin paper. I look on the back hoping to see a playing card but it is the same blue playing card pattern on the other side.

      I am little frustrated now. I walk into the dining room and yell at the dream. "I want to see the playing card." My voice sounds odd. Like I can hear my dream voice and my real voice at the same time. Like two mes talking at once. I wait for an answer and almost immediately hear the loudest most hideous SHUSHING sound. "SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" the sound is electronic and robotic like some strange android shushing me to be quite. I freak out and throw myself to the floor. I curl up in a ball and put my hands on my head. I was so unbelievably scared.

      After a moment. I realize I that a dream can't hurt me so I stand up. The room is now dark but I want to try something else. I speak to the dream again. In the same strange dual voice I loudly say, "I want to speak to my higher self." At that point the dream fades and I lose concentration. I fall into a non-lucid dream.


      False Awakening

      I wake up and start to record the lucid in my phone DJ. I see people form work in my room. My bedroom door is open. (how convenient) I see a woman at a desk in the dining room. I get an image of some green brochure in my hands. I see R standing by the door with a huge white board behind him. (BTW I saw a similar scene in rl with R today at work) I ask him what was going on. I can't remember what he said to me. I am distracted by another person writing a phone number on the white board. I can't remember that either. I wake up for real this time. I look at the time and it is around 4am.

      I try to go back to sleep but I am really juiced from the lucid. I get a lot of HH/HI and halfdream but my mind kept going back to the dream. After about an hour I fall non-lucid.
    4. Lucids #92 and #93. From a Grocery Store to a Demon Wife.

      by , 11-02-2012 at 11:23 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)


      Thoughts | Non-Lucid | Lucid | Techniques/Aids

      Bedtime 9:30P-5:00A
      400MG B6 SSILD at begining

      Love Story 2:40AM
      A green environmental hippie woman falls in love with a business man conservative. They almost part ways but they make up. She moves in with him to New York. It was a real chick flick.

      Toilet Parts Time?
      I am at the store looking at toilet parts. I see all sorts of strange looking pieces and I feel really confused about what I need to buy. My mom shows up and looks with me. I find a faucet that looks like a woodland scene for the base and deer antlers for the handles.

      WBTB 400MG B6 - Total time about 5 min

      #92 Grocery Store SSILD DILD

      There maybe be a beginning to this dream that I forgot.

      I find myself already lucid in a grocery store with a woman that is familiar to me. My wife? We are waiting for something. I watch people come and go with shopping carts. I get bored and yell, "THIS IS ALMOST AS REAL AS REAL LIFE!" Meaning real life can be so boring. My wife is a blonde and looks a little different but I think of her as my wife. Being lucidly bored and move in close to her and point to a back room door. While I push her in that direction I say, "How about you and me go back there and have a little fun? Don't worry no one will care because this is a dream."

      We are now in the back. I make out with her a little. There is a bath tub and I want to get in with her. Suddenly she resists and pulls away from me. I let her go. There is a strange scene were I was floating away and she is running after me. She looks like the blonde sheriff woman from Once Upon A Time TV show. (Strange. My wife is watching it as I type this)

      I think my lucidity must have slipped here a bit Suddenly, I am back at the bat tub. I point to it and ask, "Will you tell if I use this?"
      She says, "I haven't told anyone anything yet."

      I wake up.


      I get up and go pee then lay back down.

      #93 Work Scene SSILD to Active WILD

      I do a few rounds of SSILD but I toss and turn a lot now. I think the B6 is keeping me awake. I remember the last time I just forced myself to not move and I quickly had a WILD. So I did that again.I started getting really strong HI/HH and eventually turns into a very long dream.

      I find that I am able to manipulate the imagery much like in a lucid. I practice nose plug RCs. I even get the idea to try to get precognitive information (a side project of mine) but that will not form. I gradually find myself in a dream scene. It is a place similar to my job but different in a lot of ways. I find elements from when I worked at another place called F.A.G. (Yeah I know but that's the real name). The entire dream scene and imagery takes place in a massive room in with no walls.

      At one point I am with B at the mold shop. The mold machine has a strange cage on it and a conveyor belt. Something is stuck and I crawl in to get it. I realize this is more than HI/HH and I say, "I am dreaming." But at that point the dream fades and I feel my body in bed again and now it feels like HI/HH instead of the dream. At that point I feel a very faint SP vibration. I pause and relax and let it take me only dimly aware of what it was.

      There is darkness and then more imagery. I play around staying active and interacting with things. I don't realize that the SP was probably a good sign that I am already in the dream but things just don't see real and vivid enough anyway. My memory is vague here but I wonder around some and just mess around with things.

      Now I am sitting in front of some lockers putting shoes on. I see J and K from elementary school. They are older now. In real life I have not seen them since we were kids. J alway had a crush on K. They are sitting at a picnic style table. J is flirting with K as K talks on the phone with who I assume is her husband. I see J whisper in her ear and kiss her cheek. She brushes him playfully away. Then J hugs her from behind and grabs a boob. That was too much she gets up and leaves. I am lucid the whole time but was so amused by what I was seeing that I waited until now to take action. I notice how solid and real the dream is as I walk up to J. I say, "Hey, do you want to go to my house and eat lunch? Or did were you planning on not eating anything?"
      He looks at me, "Oh I wanted to eat."

      I smile at him and we walk. The giant room fades away and we are outside now. The outside area looks like my old elementary school. Our friendship feels as familiar as when we were kids. We walk up to my car and I see that it is smashed and dented so bad on the driver side that I think the car much be totaled and not drive-able. But I know this is just a dream and laugh. I get in away knowing that it doesn't matter what the car looks like.

      Suddenly I am driving down the familiar street and J is next to me. I come to a stop sign and never slow down. I think, "Why should I obey traffic laws in a dream?" This orange truck with a yellow and red flame jobs cuts me off. I try to steer the car into him at the last second but I am too late. He passes and I only side swipe him. If feel the dream fade. So I stop to rub my hands a bit until things feel more stable.

      Ah now I am going to have some fun! I make a right turn. The G forces of the turn feels realistic and I smile at this. I say to J, "Haha! AH LOOK OUT!" in a joking tone. In my mind I tell the dream that I want a straight open road. The street stretches out into a rural area. I punch the gas and get as much speed as the dream will let me. I keep focusing on the road. I am thinking, "I want a car to appear." Nothing comes. My vision get blurry for a bit. Then I remember to use expectation. I see a myself coming up to a top of a hill. Now I fully expect to see a car. As a top the hill. BAM there it is. I steer and hit the car head on. I tell J, "Oh no here it comes, ahhhhh." and I laugh. The car just flips out of the way and I feel no impact. Then my subC surprises me.

      The car goes over a cliff and he are doing a nose dive into a construction zone. We plung into a vat of black oil. Then we are falling down a shiny, sparkling, glowing blue water fall. I get the feeling of being in a mouthwash commercial and being immersed in cool minty flavor. As cheesy as that sounds it was actually beautiful and breathtaking. I let out a "oooohhhhh!" the dream fades into a black void and I an still falling.

      I wake up in my bed. I sit up and look around. I see my wife to my left and the room looks normal. I notice the low light and the dresser and the random stuff we still need to put away. Then, as usual, I think, "What was I dreaming? OH YEA! I could still be dreaming." I look around more closely. I see the bathroom door on the left when I know it should be on the right. "Wait a minute! I am dreaming!"

      At that moment my wife comes to life. She puts her hands up in a monster pose and screams like a banshee. The sound is not loud but high pitched. Then I see brilliantly colored rainbow crystalline spikes grow out from every part of her body. I am beyond scared as this was not expected at all. I pass out in my dream and I fall on top of her. I have no control.

      Now I am falling in the black void. Then I wake up. I am in the same situation that I was in my false awakening. I see the bathroom on the wrong side. I say, "Oh God no, I can't do that again." close my eyes and I throw myself backward. I get to skip the part where my wife was a screaming banshee.

      Now I am falling again in the darkness. I open my eyes and see the room again. I close them and now I feel myself spinning with my stomach being the center point. I can fee the centripetal force on my head, arms, and feet. I relax and enjoy the feeling.

      I begin to see that I am in another dream scene when something external and real wakes me up.


      It was my son making hungry noises and the time was almost 5am. Time to get up.
    5. 7 dreams recalled. *LUCID* at #6

      by , 08-05-2012 at 04:39 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      Bedtime 10:30p – 8:30a

      1) 1:45a Playing some sudoku like board game with Jess and Megan at our house. I walk into the living room and there are red Christmas lights everywhere. I continue the game on my phone like it was words with friends or something. I also think to play my old supervisor.

      I move to recliner and begin attempting WILD. After each NLD I quickly record what I remember on my phone app and resume WILD.

      2) 3:29a find myself in SP. I try something a little different to enter the dream. I force myself in a rush to get up out of the recliner. I feel my dream body stumble and fall and then I re-enter SP. This time I relax too much. I have a false awakening.

      I have the laptop on my chest and the recliner feels like it is reclining way too far back. I am still trying to WILD. I ear the alarm clock distantly in the bedroom. I wonder how it is 6:00 already. I expect my wife to come looking for me and sure enough I hear her walk in the living room. I just lie still because I really don't want to ruin my WILD. I figure she will just see me asleep and leave. But the computer is on my chest and on. I think she will see a post by RareCola and read it.

      Then, I hear her say. “You're going to kill yourself with that.”
      I give up my charade. “What?” I look at her as she is going back to the bedroom.
      “I said your going to kill yourself.”

      I get up because originally I had planned to get up with her at 6 and stay up for 30min and then WILD.
      I notice the recliner is turned wrong but when I go to move it there is another recliner in its place but it is a darker brown. The other recline shrinks and slides next the the strange one. I then walk into a strange kitchen. I wake up.

      Another SP episode from DEILD. This time I know that I just need to visualize a dream scene and I will enter. For some reason I get too excite and SP fades.

      3)4:38a I plant some sort of seed in the crack in the back deck. They are round and small but I don't know what it is. I water is. The water hose floods the area. Then I have another FA. I look next to me and see Janna sitting on the couch. She has marijuana seeds. She tells me she gave a seed to some kids and is worried they will get in trouble. I tell her they probably won't plant it. I go to use my phone app to record the planting dream and I realize “This isn't real”

      I wake up briefly

      4)I am now watching Johnny Bravo through my window on a TV in my neighbors yard. Then I FA and I am back in my recliner. I feel like I am holding a remote. But wake for real and see I am not.

      5)4:42a I am in the recliner. I see Travis and tell him about the fake picture I sent him. He say, “Dude I don't know how those pictures of me get posted.” I explain to him that it was just a look alike with a tramp stamp. He changes the subject.

      6)5:28a *LUCID*

      For whatever reason I am driving with my wife and another guy was with us sitting in the back but he never says anything. We go down towards my job. It is late in the morning and I decide to just take vacation. I pull into the parking lot. And I tell my wife maybe I should just call it in instead of going in to ask for vacation. Then I notice the time on the car's clock. It is 8:38AM and I realize I can't ask for vacation after 8. So I decide just to use the call in line and not have a vacation day.

      Suddenly we are inside in an office. My wife is at a desk typing on a computer. The guy is sitting several feet behind her watching the computer screen. He is behaving like a silent observer. Ignore him completely. I am on the floor putting my shoes on. As I am getting the last shoe on I remember to pay attention to my awareness like I do in RL. I think to myself, “I am dreaming.” But I didn't mean anything. Then it dawns on me. “I AM dreaming!”

      I don't have my shoe on but I know it doesn't matter. I look around. I remember to stay calm. I try to focus on various office supplies on the desk. I see things like a coffee mug with pens and pencils in it. Then I look my my wife and see the guy in peripheral vision. I never really look at the guy. Maybe he will be my dream guide. Too bad I forgot to think of that. Anyway I know neither one matters and talking to them at this point would be a waste. They are just DCs.

      I stand up and turn around. I see a door that is partially open. It is the only way out of the small room. I briefly remember that if I ever become lucid at work I would have fun with it and do the things I couldn't do in RL. I rush for the door and expect to see the production floor.

      I open it and instead... The room I was in is at the end of a long hallway full of doors. Each door goes to a different office. "OK fine. Stay calm. Focus. You are dreaming. Keep awareness." I walk down the hallway and pop into random offices. The walls are wood paneled and with no decor. The doors are those cheap hollow wood doors. They are unpainted and stained a very dark brown. I don't notice the flooring. The color scheme is very bland and boring. All the offices are empty. There are no people anywere. "Ok strange but not that strange for a dream." I hear a phone ring once. I walk into an office room that I thought it came from. I see a desk with computer and a phone that is off the hook. There are a few papers scattered on the desk. I pick the phone up and put it to my ear. I hear nothing so I press zero. I hear a short ring and then, a young woman's voice answers, “Student services.” I think it's odd so I don't say anything. I press the hook with my finger to hang up. I don't hear a dial tone. So I just lay the phone back where it was. I can hear her voice but distantly, “Hello?” The sound of it is as you would expect for a phone away from your ear. I am a little impressed with my subconscious at how vivid the dream is.

      I continue down the hall. Now I am looking at double glass doors. It looks really dark outside and I can't see anything beyond the glass. I want to break glass so I rush at it. I can hear my footsteps like I am wearing boots on concrete and I actually feel the impact of my feet on the floor. I note this is really cool for a dream.

      I dive head first for the glass but it is soft and doesn't break. I feel my head got stuck. It feels like a wall of Jello. Of course, the natural reaction is to close your eyes. I feel the dream fading. I don't want to lose it so I back out. I re-stabilize myself by looking at the glass doors and focusing. “OK fine. I just want to leave here its boring.” I slowly push the doors with my right hand. There is no sensation and its like the glass is gone but then the door opens and I am looking at the next set of doors. I feel a little frustrated that glass doors are keeping me in this building. I almost feel trapped but I am determined. "Maybe dreams are like being a ghost in the movie Betelgeuse. You can never leave the building. No that's a stupid thought. This is my dream." I push the next doors slowly open.

      Then I am immediately engulfed in darkness. I feel myself wanting to wake up. I begin rubbing my hands together. I can feel the friction and heat. It is almost painful. So I stop and clasp my hands together. I am still in the dark void and I think, "Maybe I am awake and I was really doing that with my hands. No, I don't believe it." Then I realize that I in darkness because I just have my dream eyes closed. I slowly open them but cautious not to open my waking eyes. For a moment I am confused because my eyes felt so real. "Am I opening my waking eyes?" So. I only open then halfway. I see that I am at the driver side door of a Grey truck. I decide its safe and I open my eyes fully now. I notice It's not very clear or vivid. The dream quality not as good as it should be. except for my sense of touch. I touch the glass of the door. Solid and feels real. I slap at it a little and am surprised that it sounded normal and I could feel the impact on my hands.
      Then for some reason I am abruptly jolted awake. I think I heard a noise in the house. It was storming.


      7) 8:24a I am going with some people to a house I own. I am renovating and selling. I see a bunch of low class scummy people on the porch. I see a shirtless fat man. His checks hang down real low and he pushes his man boobs together. Somehow it all looks like a giant ball sack. I feel disgusted. I loudly tell someone I don't know how I will ever sale this house will all these kind of people around. I enter the house and the floors are still dusty from sanding the hardwood. There is a little girl there and I kindly ask her to go outside. I wake up.
    6. Huge Storm, Dude Where's My Car?, WILD *LUCID*

      by , 07-16-2012 at 10:41 AM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      Aids:1/8 tea peppermint oil before bed
      Methods:DEILD/WILD - FA
      Morning Suppliments:500mg L-Lysine, 500mg C, 595mg Potassium Gluconcate, 1 Super B-Complex
      Sleep Quality: Light, wakefulness, RLS

      Huge Storm 1:12 AM
      Huge storm coming. Riding with dad. I see storm shelter. I hear some song that reminds me of someone. And then another song. I remember an ex-girlfriend.
      "I say I hate all songs."
      I see Jeremy and Jess in the car with us.
      "What song? I say do tunes to what you want."

      Dude, Where's My Car? 3:15 AM ish

      I am at my parents sleeping in a recliner. It is dark and I can't sleep.
      I went to my parents with the kids. I am leaving. But I can't find my car. I see a white car that is stripped down. The kids think it's mine but I know better. We run down the street looking for it. I feel tired and weak and can't run well. I see white cars everywhere but none are mine. I don't want to call the police yet because I keep thinking that I remember that I parked in a strange place and I knew I would not remember. I tell the kids this.

      Now we are in some nursing home and wondering around. Not sure what happens here. Something about me not being a good enough Christian. How I let bad things into my life. Thats why bad things happen. Some old woman? I feel guilty for lucid dreaming like it is a sin.

      We leave. I tell my kids we got to look some more before we call the cops. Deanna says that Dalynn already did. I asked her about that. It was when I was holding her and she blew into a strange balloon.
      She says, "Well that lady scared me. So I called the cops."
      We run outside but I feel overwhelmed and too tired to walk. I lay down in the grass and dirt. I curl up on a mound of dirt. I tell the kids I just want to close my eyes. My body relaxes and I wake up.

      WILD 3:30AM ish
      When I wake up I am in the recliner that I moved to because of my RLS. I don't move a muscle. I relax myself and I roll my eyes into the back of my head and focus on my skull. Sleep Paralysis almost immediately kicks in.

      I hear the familiar strong wind sound laced with rinings of the ears. I feel the familiar vibrations and windy sensations. I noticed this time that the sound and vibrations increased and decreased in intensity like waves on a beach. I make a quick note of this. I can feel my legs moving up. It feels like something has me by the ankles. I become afraid and I have to remind myself it is not real. I try to enter the dream but I get stuck in SP for longer than I wanted and because of the last dream I thought I was doing something evil. I keet telling myself that it was ok. And it wasn't real. You do this all the time and its always been fine. No good, the feeling was persistent.
      I try to ignore the thoughts and visualise anything to move on. I my mind wonder and my dream eyes see.

      I see a road. I am flying low and fast down a vivid and brightly lit road road hugged tightly by evergreen trees. I enjoy this but my eyes begin to opened and I see the dark living room with one eye and the road with the other.

      I go back into full SP. Still the same feeling of guilt. I think that this is getting no where and I want to go back to my bed. So I suddenly and forcibly make myself get up. I stumble back to my bedroom. I heard and felt my loud footsteps.

      I think how odd this is. I was feeling the vibrations like wind on my body. The loud sound of wind and ringing. Typical SP. Was it possible to not be truly paralyzed in sp?

      I now find myself tangled in my blanket. I am standing by my bed and I can't find my way out. I am unsure of what happened. I feel so confused and my mind feels numb.

      I say, "I'm dreaming. I'm dreaming." But my voice sounds odd. It is weak and unsure. Almost like I am asking a question. I am not convinced. Then I throw myself in the bed. Now I can find my way out. I feel half asleep and strange.

      All my actions have woke my wife up. My wife mocks me. And complains how this is not good what I'm doing. She is pissed I woke her. I feel embarrassed and say nothing. She gets up to go the bathroom. I close my eyes and relax. But instead of going to sleep I wake up still in the recliner. God dammed FA!

      I was so sure I was awake.

      Updated 07-22-2012 at 08:20 PM by 5967

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , false awakening , memorable
    7. Diaro - entry (04:40 AM, Wednesday 11 July 2012) *LUCID*

      by , 07-11-2012 at 12:16 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      Happy Skies

      I am molesting a woman but she quickly puts me in my place. Then I see my wife bent over.
      I press against her and say,"How much?"
      She laughs and replys, "$100 and you can do whatever you like."
      I get handsy with her and ask, "How about $50?"
      She says, "For that you get a panty ride."
      She is in just panties and a t-shirt and gives me a lap dance. I close my eyes in the dream and it feels amazing.

      I suddenly open my eyes because the shock of it. (It is a false awakening) I want to go to bathroom and change but its like the dream the other day. There are people sleeping in odd places. I see my nephew asleep in the bathtub.
      I realize am in a trailor house so I go to the other end. I see my dad asleep in a bed. I go to the bathroom. I start to change and I see red carpet in the bathroom. Something about this gives me a horrible memory and a bad aweful feeling. I think something like this is the house where that bad thing happened. I start to shake and feel scared(I honestly have no clue what that was about) But the feeling quickly passes. And I go about my bussiness.

      As I walk out I see his eyes are open. He is just starting at the wall. I know he sees me but he doesn't move. I think maybe he is just half asleep still. Then, I hear him say something rude (can't remember what he said) I stop and look at him but just then my dad walks in. My dad tells my dad, "You stop that. What he does is perfectly natural and we all do it!"
      I don't want this so I tell my dad, "Pleeeeease just let it go. Please."
      (The man looked like my dad but didn't sound like my dad at all. He almost sounded feminine and flamboyant. Plus my dad talking to my dad... Whuuuuut?)

      We walk outside. I look around and another trailer in front of us with a faded deck. I see mountains in the distance and a clear blue sky and I see a nebula thing in the day sky. Almost like that sky in Asgard in the Thor movie. I see a line of planets there to. They look brownish and dark with almost a grainy texture. There are very large ones and very smalls one. The large ones have what look like moons. The colors are bland. Mostly browns and yellows. I see a few stars in it though. I see texture and great detail. I stop and feel confused. I think how awesome the sight is.

      Then, in a flash, I think, "wait something is odd. Something unnatural. This is not normal. I am dreaming!!!!!" I just know that I am dreaming. I don't even bother with RC. (Like I said before, if I have the mind to question, I just know)

      I tell my dad. "Dad! We are dreaming!" As I begin to float I laugh and giggle breathlessly. I feel so giddy. I am so happy because I have been trying so hard lately.
      The guy posing as my dad blows air out and looks scared. I think for a moment how I have had it in the back of my mind to find a dream guide. This guy may be the one. I let it go for now. I notice that I am touching the ground again
      I say, "No really! We are dreaming."
      I take his hand and use my other hand to push of the railing on the deck. We float up together a few meters. He is smiling and laughing quietly. I now know he believes me. I am out of breath with excitement. The entire scene is so vivid and so awesome. The sky is clear. I see the mountains in the distance. The summer grass below us is brown in spots. The air feels cool. I feel great peace.

      I look back at the planets in the sky. They are very vivid pictures. Still there. I think how it looks like a text book. I study it so that I can remember the thing that made me lucid this time. I think, "Yes, strange things in the sky. Of course, that is a very old dream sign of mine."
      Then suddenly I remember TOTM but before I could do anything every thing fades to black and I am back in my recliner with my eyes closed wishing it had not ended so soon.


      Updated 07-22-2012 at 08:17 PM by 5967

      Tags: dad, sky, wife
      Categories
      lucid , false awakening , memorable , side notes
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