Mind if I try again?
You have a lot more experience than me and I may be trying to push water up a hill or suggesting things you have tried but I can relate and feel as I should help.

-Auto suggestion
-Therapy
-Meditation (much cheaper than therapy)
-Try to analyze your dreams, they probably don't mean any thing but it is worth a try.

If nothing works mentally look at your physical sleeping conditions. For me, the most undesirable things (nightmares, grotesque scenes, etc) happen when over heating.

Are you stressed in any way?
Are you worried about your life? Relationships? Job? Pets? Colour of the ceiling? Any thing?

Some thing just popped into my head...Are your in dream family members detailed as they are in waking life?