Steph´s Workbook

[StephL]

Reality Checks: - Looking at my hands - Trying to breathe with nose held closed - Trying to remember what I did 10 min. ago Dream Signs: - Being at the place, I spent my youth at (Bavaria, Tegernsee) - School and meeting schoolmates/ex-boyfriends - University - my old job - Trying and failing to achieve the simplest things - like not getting somewhere, or not getting somewhere in time - packing things up and something staying behind - trying to talk to somebody, whom I see in the dream, and not managing for some reason - my (dead) grandmother - lots more actually.. Short-Term Goals: - well - gaining lucidity after not managing for over a year - keeping a dream-journal and not only trying to remember dreams for the day after - putting them down - reviewing them - working on real-life awareness and prospective memory - keeping the desire alive Long-Term Goals: - gaining control, so I can create the scenario I want to dream in, while dreaming - gaining control, so I can accomplish tasks, I set up before I go to sleep - taking part in the challenges and getting these nice wings.. - finding inspiration and maybe answers/insights into my psyche and maybe being able to resolve difficulties in real life - working on my dart-throwing technique - it is possible to do something there with visualization and banishing mind-chatter (sounds a bit weird - I know..) Lucid/Dream Recall History: - first time around I gained lucidity in my early 20s after following Castaneda with telling myself it will happen for 2 weeks every night before falling asleep - and when it did work - stabilizing the dream with looking at my hands, till I saw every little detail crystal clear. Maybe because of the expectation, that I had entered a real other plane of existence - where I could also come to real harm - getting into a panic and turning the dream into a nightmare - walls of a cave which I was exploring for fun with friends suddenly turning to sand and coming down on me. With all the willpower I could muster, I transferred my consciousness back into my body - just to find, I am unable to move or scream - leading to a very real fear of dying. That kept me off trying again for years. - second time - after reading up on LD and getting rid of my superstitions - incl. turning agnostic - a wonderful, quite long LD - so lovely hyper-real visual dreamscape - I could fly and go where ever I wanted (well - I just wanted to go to this place of my youth - but anyway..) - met people, I wanted to meet - it was pure joy. - one semi-lucid experience - the same crystal-clear and beautiful imagery and short glimpses of the realization that it was a dream, but no real lucidity with control - one instance, where I got lucid, but it faded around me - tried spinning - but really wildly spinning - I read now it is not meant to be done like that - bam - dream gone - only emptiness - and I woke up Current Technique: - DILD

[NyxCC]

Welcome to intro class StephL! Seems to me that you are pretty aware of your dreams and have completed a great deal of work so far. You have a nice long list if dream signs, which you can go over the day and before bed as a mantra to help you catch them during your dreams. That's one of the things that have actually helped me increase my ld count (in addition to other techs). I have printed a list of DS, quite similar to yours by the way, including school, grandma, past places where I lived, etc. Then during the day, before bed or wbtb I would repeat to myself "I see dream sign1, I realize that I am dreaming, I see dream sign2, I realize that I am dreaming and so on. Very good job conquering your fear from your first lucid experience too. During dreams we can be extremely sensitive about the environment and contents of the dream and our moods drive our experiences. It takes a while to realize this and also one needs to practice to remain calm and positive. That way, one can determine the direction our experiences take.

[Brizzl]

It would be interesting if your grandmother turned out to be your dream guide. You should look further into that.

[StephL]

Welcome to intro class StephL! Seems to me that you are pretty aware of your dreams and have completed a great deal of work so far. You have a nice long list if dream signs, which you can go over the day and before bed as a mantra to help you catch them during your dreams. That's one of the things that have actually helped me increase my ld count (in addition to other techs). I have printed a list of DS, quite similar to yours by the way, including school, grandma, past places where I lived, etc. Then during the day, before bed or wbtb I would repeat to myself "I see dream sign1, I realize that I am dreaming, I see dream sign2, I realize that I am dreaming and so on. Very good job conquering your fear from your first lucid experience too. During dreams we can be extremely sensitive about the environment and contents of the dream and our moods drive our experiences. It takes a while to realize this and also one needs to practice to remain calm and positive. That way, one can determine the direction our experiences take. Thank you NyxCC! Oh - yeah there are many dream signs. That is a good idea - I will print a list and go over this as mantra - somehow I had problems with finding something I like. I have an alarm-mechanism sorted now, where I can get an alarm, which doesn´t need to be put out. So I could try WBTB as well. I´ll see. Friday is darts with my mates day - and we usually drink some alcohol and go to bed late - like now - not a good day for it - but I hope I will have something for my dream-journal - at least a bit.. I hope I´m close - last night I fell out of a cable-car, which had morphed from a simple train. It was going almost 90° up and suddenly was open.. My dream-self "knew" then, that this was supposed to be Florence - before it was just a school-excursion to Italy. But it was weird - like all columns - not broad - more like from a scaffold for a building site - but mostly not connected. And people all covered in some sort of white dust where living there and going about their business - stepping from column top to column top - rarely some cross-pieces. Maybe 500 qm in sight only consisting of scaffolding and lots of dust and rather unhappy people - like some sort of slum. And I stood there - also in that scaffold-forest on some columns/cross pieces - and thought - noo - I was in Florence before - it was not like that. There was a memory of Florence then - but I just concluded, this must be some suburb, and the city comes on top of that cable-car-line.. Then the scenery got wider - part-of-a-city-size. It would be interesting if your grandmother turned out to be your dream guide. You should look further into that. What exactly is a dream guide?

[Brizzl]

A dream guide is basically somebody who seems to show up in your dreams very often. If you establish that connection when you are lucid you can ask questions like "Are you my dream guide?" or "Can you help me be lucid?" They are almost like the dream part of your subconscious and can give many valuable tips on lucid living. Also whenever you see them you can automatically know that you dreaming. Dream guides can be very helpful.

[StephL]

A dream guide is basically somebody who seems to show up in your dreams very often. If you establish that connection when you are lucid you can ask questions like "Are you my dream guide?" or "Can you help me be lucid?" They are almost like the dream part of your subconscious and can give many valuable tips on lucid living. Also whenever you see them you can automatically know that you dreaming. Dream guides can be very helpful. Ah - I see - thank you! I might try that - but somehow I´d rather keep her "her" if that makes sense. Like - I read, when someone appears - you can basically "simulate" them. So she would react like deep down I expect her to react and I could talk to her as "her". But such a dream guide sounds nice! Maybe I try to "establish" or create or just find another entity as a companion - thinking of someone non-human, like a cute alien or so..lol - who acts as one.. That would be much harder than try it with my Grandma, I guess. Well - next time I meet her lucidly - I´ll just listen to what she has to say - maybe it´s going to be as you say!

[NyxCC]

Oh - yeah there are many dream signs. That is a good idea - I will print a list and go over this as mantra - somehow I had problems with finding something I like. I have an alarm-mechanism sorted now, where I can get an alarm, which doesn´t need to be put out. So I could try WBTB as well. Great! Looking forward to your updates. These automatic off alarms are really useful for DEILDs. Give it a try and see how that goes. If you feel you are too sleepy, it may be better to actually get out of bed for a while. This helps waking up necessary for ld parts of the brain.

[StephL]

Great! Looking forward to your updates. These automatic off alarms are really useful for DEILDs. Give it a try and see how that goes. If you feel you are too sleepy, it may be better to actually get out of bed for a while. This helps waking up necessary for ld parts of the brain. The alarm was too low in volume - didn´t wake from it - lol My update: one more moment of lucidity in one of two dreams I can recall well - but have them only on paper - too private. Again - I looked at my hands - they were there instantly - I did not get them past blurry and blue - light blue. Everything else was only greyness - and I forgot, if it was followed by a short wakening or direct re-entry in the dream - about showing somebody a DV-like forum and it´s special effects - lol - 3D! After waking once more - I went for WILD. Laying there - expecting my visualization skills providing my with something - it was my body-sensibility that blew my mind - initially. I know it´s not about them - but "bells and whistles" was something completely new on my experience range. First around my mouth - then head - then diverging towards all body - fist slight only (used susurration wrongly before) and then quite a lot of Bsssssssss!!! So fascinating! Towards the end of it - I saw a mandala-structure in electric blue on the back of my eyelids - bit behind them it seemed - me looking outside into black with it hovering - theoretically in my room. Very beautiful - a cross but like the red cross with some stuff missing towards the middle and round patterns overlayed and inlayed. This makes me really confident and this forum was a speedway I got to say - towards the door at least for now! Been looking for the door a while.. Cool.gif

[NyxCC]

It looks like your awareness just needed to be reminded to ld. You are getting great results already! And I saw you posted a dream about a baby doing Obe. That was so cute! The WILD experience sounds really cool too. I rarely get any vibrations, but sometimes the transition can be really fast. One moment you are lying in bed, the next you are already asleep and can see though your eyelids. Really weird. In such a case it helps to wait a bit, then think about moving or floating. You can also roll in bed if you have the impression you're in your dream body already.

[StephL]

Thanks - yeah - maybe I was just assuming it was over and I woke up, which I then made real by moving - maybe I could have gotten away towards my mandala after it dimmed a bit.. I can not really explain, why - but I made a break in efforts last night - too much posting on DV!! cheeky.gif I repeated some mantras going to bed much too late - but it is rather easier for me to go about it after waking from at least one dream I believe. And I did that - wake up I mean - that I usually do between dreams in the morning - made notes in my paper DJ and then somehow decided I want to rather go on having a normal dream. Are the alarms meant to catch you in REM, or is it fine, if you wake up in between dreams anyway towards the morning? I could just as well forget about it, if it is the latter. Naja - I think, I somehow was exhausted and saw sort of something strenuous in trying to LD. Not really realistic probably - anyway - I had the next dream then - the one my snippet is from - and I actually liked it so much - I re-entered it twice and went on with it - but non-lucidly all the time. When I am free to sleep in - and I have this great luxury for a little while more atm. - I do this from time to time - but it´s been a while I liked something so much, I tried till I really had more than enough sleep - like - one hour ago...redface.gif On the other hand - to bed at 3 am - up at 12:30 - 9.5 hours is not that much. I just need to be careful to not get into too queer a rhythm - I want to catch the light - and it´s getting winter..

[NyxCC]

I can not really explain, why - but I made a break in efforts last night - too much posting on DV!! Naja - I think, I somehow was exhausted and saw sort of something strenuous in trying to LD. Not really realistic probably - anyway - I had the next dream then - the one my snippet is from - and I actually liked it so much - I re-entered it twice and went on with it - but non-lucidly all the time. Understandable, we all need to have our little breaks. There's no rule that says you've got to try for an ld every single day. I think what's important is when you are trying to be really enthusiastic about it. I also allow for couple of days off, then I am back with more enthusiasm. I love these non-ld re-entries. The feeling is great! Sometimes you don't care about acting in the dream, just want to continue dreaming. You will yourself to go on with the dream and voila! Really nice! Are the alarms meant to catch you in REM, or is it fine, if you wake up in between dreams anyway towards the morning? I could just as well forget about it, if it is the latter. The way I've read it, the alarms are best set for the end of REM. That means n cycles of 90mins after falling asleep. Well, that's too technical for me personally, and I really can't say at what time I will be able to fall asleep to set the alarm properly and honestly, there's no guarantee it will hit end of REM. I use the alarm just in case I miss my desired wbtb time (after 5.5-6hrs). That's in case one is sleeping really deeply and finds it hard to wake up. The thing is, we tend to wake up naturally for just a short while after each REM (after a certain time at least, for me that's about 3-4 hrs of sleep, where I have my first natural wake). Some people are unaware of this, others use it for toilet breaks. Lders use it for wbtb or DEILDs. So, there are plenty of opportunities to ld right there.

[StephL]

Yeah - I really wake up naturally in between dreams - now I do something - journalling or toilet or whatever - this gets more and more obvious. My husband had to search for that alarm function quite a while - don´t think I will use it, though.. Riight - it seems to go forwards - two lucid mini-episodes, where I did something, but nothing much: Stressy Nightmare In Several Parts - Two Mini-Lucid Zoomings - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views I really have to combine awareness for myself and the surroundings together - this time surroundings took over.. It is progress - but my dream-recall is so bad from that night and it was all one protracted nightmare - it somehow doesn´t feel so much like it. Also - interesting - I´ve been drinking alcohol Friday (bit more) and yesterday (not much..) - that plays havoc with recall - week before and days in between - it worked so much better!! But it seems to work nicely to become aware that I dream in the first place - just from then on the problems begin. This of course is much better than not getting there - but I am really impatient - 3 times since starting journalling - a DILD did take place - but I got simply nowhere - well - I got somewhere locally this time - but it is in no way comparable to what I had years ago. I just don´t get a grip on me being fully immersed in a 3D environment with body and all. Only the realization kicking in for now.

[NyxCC]

Riight - it seems to go forwards - two lucid mini-episodes, where I did something, but nothing much: Stressy Nightmare In Several Parts - Two Mini-Lucid Zoomings - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views I really have to combine awareness for myself and the surroundings together - this time surroundings took over.. Hey, that's really cool, congrats on those two mini-lds. I really liked how you zoom moved in the first one. Looks like there's a zooming fad going on these days. Now I must try it for myself . Pretty good results so far. Having mini episodes like these so often is really promising. Right, so what are your plans for the next time you become lucid, because it is coming soon! Also - interesting - I´ve been drinking alcohol Friday (bit more) and yesterday (not much..) - that plays havoc with recall - week before and days in between - it worked so much better!! But it seems to work nicely to become aware that I dream in the first place - just from then on the problems begin. This of course is much better than not getting there - but I am really impatient - 3 times since starting journalling - a DILD did take place - but I got simply nowhere - well - I got somewhere locally this time - but it is in no way comparable to what I had years ago. I just don´t get a grip on me being fully immersed in a 3D environment with body and all. Alcohol initially suppresses REM and then there's rebound once its effects wear off. This might explain variations in recall, dream vividness and contents. Although I wouldn't rely on it to get lucid. As I said, you have been progressing really good. These things take time, but you have fared well so far. Keep up all the RCs and awareness and focus on your goals. Take a moment to rub your hands and then start doing whatever you have planned doing. I think that works best to keep you from getting entangled in the dream.

[StephL]

Hey, that's really cool, congrats on those two mini-lds. I really liked how you zoom moved in the first one. Looks like there's a zooming fad going on these days. Now I must try it for myself . Pretty good results so far. Having mini episodes like these so often is really promising. Right, so what are your plans for the next time you become lucid, because it is coming soon! Alcohol initially suppresses REM and then there's rebound once its effects wear off. This might explain variations in recall, dream vividness and contents. Although I wouldn't rely on it to get lucid. As I said, you have been progressing really good. These things take time, but you have fared well so far. Keep up all the RCs and awareness and focus on your goals. Take a moment to rub your hands and then start doing whatever you have planned doing. I think that works best to keep you from getting entangled in the dream. Thank you! And noo - I try to actually not drink any alcohol at all any more. It´s not much nor even more days than not in a week. But it is so obviously impairing my recall when I do - and it´s cell-poison - so why not ditch it completely? Well - not Fridays or parties - my darting-buddies would probably be less amusing if I did.. On the other hand - one of them (it depends, who comes - but up to 8 of us) did have a serious problem and is tea-total now. And he tends to roll his eyes..hehe. Except 3 they are all exile-Britons - dry darts almost being anathema. Oh - here my last DJ: Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views - StephL - Dream Journals No lucidity - too damn lazy to WILD again when it would have been time for it - but great dream! Don´t worry - not a certain question in the moment - bundle your energies for the ones next doors and my evtl. coming ones. But very nice to have a chat with you! smile.png

[NyxCC]

Good to know! You have no idea what kind of drinking ideas I have seen circulate around the forum. Alright. Thanks for the post and sweet dreams!

[StephL]

I think, I have to fix something with my intent to DILD. I feel, that this one experience with almost WILD has sapped away a bit of energy in this regard - like thinking - ah - DILD is so unpredictable - but maybe WILD is easier (because these bells were there so fast, when I tried for the first time..). So what I really look forward to is waking up and then.. Maybe I should even drop the intention to go for one, to free up the expectation for a DILD. Because the second time, when I had planned the WILD, I wasn´t interested, when the time would have been right - and today I was too late maybe, or made some weird mistake.. Anyway - recall is good - I´m just a bit torn about how to journal - only private - like the last two days - was once disappointing, I was too lazy - and yesterday I did type my stuff, but it was a much less satisfying activity than doing it in here. But my dreams throw up a lot of personally interesting - well but also personal stuff. Trying to do the leaving-out-dance later.

[NyxCC]

I think, I have to fix something with my intent to DILD. I feel, that this one experience with almost WILD has sapped away a bit of energy in this regard - like thinking - ah - DILD is so unpredictable - but maybe WILD is easier (because these bells were there so fast, when I tried for the first time..). So what I really look forward to is waking up and then.. Maybe I should even drop the intention to go for one, to free up the expectation for a DILD. Because the second time, when I had planned the WILD, I wasn´t interested, when the time would have been right - and today I was too late maybe, or made some weird mistake.. I see. Well, I personally don't care as much whether I get a dild or a wild as long as it's an ld I'm super happy. There's also something else about wilds, but I am not going to type it right now, because I don't want to influence your experiences by setting expectations. (Nothing interesting, just an observation). You will tell us how it goes and then we can compare. In the beginning I was trying very hard to wild, but couldn't quite get the hang of it. I found a way to it through the back door. Most of the time, when I do an extended wbtb (15-20min) and later have trouble falling asleep, I would get an ld. Like this, I get lots of unintentional wilds or from scratch lds (basically you miss the transition part, you just fall asleep and then you are lucid from the beginning of the dream). For me that's the easiest way to get my lds. I do repeat mantras during wbtbs. Depending on how much of the other DILD practices I do, I can get dilds too even if I skip the wbtb. For these daily RCs and details noticing like ADA, staring at my hands with autosuggestion mantra "I am dreaming" and DS repetition have been most effective. I can't say which dreams are better, I think it is good to practice and try for both though. Also, the more dilds you get, the easier wild becomes, there's this spillover effect. But people are different. We have some people here that easily do WILDs and DEILDs but not get many DILDs and the other way around. By the way, I have heard a lot people also get wilds with the SSILD technique. Here's the link if you are interested: SSILD At any rate mantras to remind yourself that you are dreaming plus any tasks are of great help with both techniques and so is WBTB. Anyway - recall is good - I´m just a bit torn about how to journal - only private - like the last two days - was once disappointing, I was too lazy - and yesterday I did type my stuff, but it was a much less satisfying activity than doing it in here. But my dreams throw up a lot of personally interesting - well but also personal stuff. Trying to do the leaving-out-dance later. There's a lot that we can learn about ourselves from dreams, recurring patterns, emotions, etc. I totally understand not wanting to post personal stuff. I guess if you still feel like posting but there is something personal you can make generalizations to make things more obscure. In the end journalling is for you - keep track of what's going on inside, determine dream signs and of course a tool to help achieve lucidity. Also, in the long run you can change even normal dream contents - using a mix of autosuggestion, external stimuli selection, also meditation and analysis (like releasing trapped emotions), the last one can take a lot of work.

[StephL]

http://www.dreamviews.com/general-lu...ml#post2060886

[NyxCC]

Hey! Congrats on the long ld!!! :bravo: Cool dream control and being mischievous with the vase. I also liked the flying around like a bee thing.

[StephL]

Yeah - thank you!! Well - a human body flying about in it, was not the architect´s concept for that house.. So I felt a bit like a crazed bumble-bee - maybe one day I can try to be an animal. Reports of people doing that seem very sparse, though. Did you try out to take on a completely different body before?

[NyxCC]

Well - a human body flying about in it, was not the architect´s concept for that house.. Oh, wait until you start phasing through the walls. No architecture can stop you then! So I felt a bit like a crazed bumble-bee - maybe one day I can try to be an animal. Reports of people doing that seem very sparse, though. Did you try out to take on a completely different body before? They're not that sparse as you may think. Such transformations are really cool! Unfortunately, I’ve only remembered to do it three times: one full into a tiger, one partial tiger, and one partial shark (the shark was for Totm Aug). Here are couple of links: Obsessed with TOTM full tiger transformation Rem Rebound partial tiger transformation in ld1 Long Journey to the Beach partial shark transformation at dream end On top of my head Scionox quite often transforms or partially into a dragon, Xanous has been a werewolf, CanisLucidis did a junior King Kong transformation for Toty, and sivason has done lots of experimental transformations with the food chain. CanisLucidis - Donkey Kong Junior Sivason - Swim as an eel part 1 food chain Sivason - Advanced dream goal part 2 food chain I think that transforming into something that’s closer to one’s size should be at least initially easier, although there are practically no limitations as to how far one can go. So, maybe we will read about you becoming a bumble -bee in one of your next lds.

[StephL]

Oh - great - thank you NyxCC! This is motivating - looking forward to your tiger and shark stories and dragons and, and.. Experiments with the food chain sounds very interesting, too! I didn´t yet look - but have a lot of associations, as to what that might mean. I unfortunately got to battle down a gastro-enteritis virus at the moment, and that greatly impairs my lucid desires. More or less any desires, actually.. but it´s getting better - maybe next night will be fine already - I hope. But I will read these and dream of dreaming a bit. I don´t know where that was, but when I read about lucid dreaming a bit more the second time of my life - and had two of them - I came about somebody describing how he dreamt himself into a butterfly and that was very, very beautiful and exotic! I could also do these witch-tricks I read about as a child and later when coming across Terry Pratchett .. First the walls, though! Great - thank you once more NyxCC!

[NyxCC]

I could also do these witch-tricks I read about as a child and later when coming across Terry Pratchett .. First the walls, though! Cool! Looking forward to that! Yes, Terry Pratchett, read him a long time ago, but if I remember correctly it was Esme that turned into a crow in one of the books. I really liked those stories. Maybe I need to get the digital version of a couple of his books sometime. One looks at things from a different perspective when one is lucid dreaming I wish you to get better soon! Lots of sleep and good hydration. Take care, Steph!

[StephL]

Yepp - I am restored - feeling completely healthy - aand - I did have success once more: Yippee - A Lucid With Doing Several Tasks - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views Very proud of that! It was a bit of a rush, though - mainly doing the tasks to put a checkmark next to them - not so much for the experience as such. So - I didn´t stabilize and concentrate my attention overly much on my surroundings - they were less vivid and elaborated as a result. But my memory was really intact - as to what the tasks were, and the months to say backwards - no problem whatsoever. But a little hick-up with fear of jumping out of a high window and coming down hard on my back when dropping backwards. Pratchett is one of my favourite authors - I love his wit and humour. Somehow I never saw what all the fuss was about with Harry Potter, though.. Got to try to remember a book, which I really liked, with a wizardry school in the classic manner.. It went like somebody having read something like the "Narnia-Saga" - it was obviously referring to that, but not namely - and then coming into that world himself.. From a modern-age point of view, and with depths to the characters - good book - will find out..

[NyxCC]

Whoaa! Fantastic entry! Congrats on the ld, totm. It looks like you were on a dream control spree, did so much stuff! Really cool! I also like how your DCs come up with well thought of answers, mine are retards 90 percent of the time. Ah yay for another zoom in!!! Yup, TP's really good. Reading his books is a really enjoyable experience. There are few authors with such wit indeed. And all the descriptions of strange objects and actions remind me of dreaming. I don't know what's with the HP frenzy either. I wish I had the time to read more books but am always torn between fitness, meditation and scientific mags.