Thread: Rant and Rave, Cry and Complain

Originally Posted by Zhaylin

Kitties, that must really suck. Thankfully I don't HAVE to work. Every now and then I want a job for extra money but I could NOT handle dealing with people. I'd be an emotional wreck. So pat yourself on the back for me. At least you're trying I hope it gets easier for you.
Is there a smaller place you could work at? When I've thought about working I automatically crossed fast food and Sheetz (gas station/convenience store/deli) off my list. But Exxon and Speedway would have been perfect. You still have customer interact and turning gas pumps on, cleaning etc, but there's no madhouse rush to do a million things at once.

Thanks =) it is getting easier. I applied at a few places that seemed better too, but none were really hiring.

Originally Posted by tommo

Put it this way, it's not like it's a difficult job. If you stop worrying that you're going to make mistakes, you will stop making mistakes hehe
Everyone sucks at first, because there's just heaps of new things to learn.
Apparently, for some reason unknown to me, McDonalds does look good on a resume, I guess they make you work pretty hard, so you will have a better chance
at landing a better job soon!

It's true haha, it's not hard, just takes a while. I don't make toooo many mistakes luckily lol, usually I just have to ask someone a question and the customer gets impatient with me >< hopefully though yeah, thanks =)

edit:

Originally Posted by Dianeva

Kitties, I used to be similar when I started my job, probably worse. I was so terrified of dealing with people, it was a nightmare. I also used to be unable to refuse shifts, even though I hated being given shifts last-minute, but I finally learned to think of myself and say no. You need to learn to do that. Chances are, they can find somebody else. If you choose to take a shift, it should only be because you want the money enough that you are willing to suffer through work for it, not out of obligation. And yes, if you haven't yet worked many shifts, you will get better at it. It will probably help you in other areas of life as well.

That's true...just something I have to learn I guess. And yeah, I'm hoping it will help in other areas, with dealing with people and stuff mostly. Thanks, sucks that you had to deal with it too but that helped.


I still feel bad for ranting a bit, it's not nearly as bad as I make it out to be and I really shouldn't be complaining at all.. Also came home early after just cleaning everything several times since it was completely dead lol.

(I'd respond in here more myself but I'm terrible at comforting/giving advice to people D; Hugs to everyone anyway..!)

Originally Posted by Dianeva

Something annoying happened this morning and I do have a rant about my mother. I realised last night that my body seems to be telling me, in a sense, to stop drinking so much. It isn't letting me feel the alcohol properly anymore. Every night it becomes more difficult to drink. Last night I drank an entire bottle of wine and about 1L of cider, but was only semi-drunk, it wore off quickly, and something about it didn't feel right. I've also been eating way too much and am starting to notice a slight weight gain, I just look terrible. Even my face is starting to look wrong somehow, unhealthy. I've also been getting stomach cramps, high up on my sides. So I decided to stop drinking, and to start eating healthily again, detoxifying my body.

Spoiler for Rant about my mother:

So here is the rant. This morning I was feeling quite good, it was sunny out. I made myself a healthy breakfast and then prepared to go to a coffee shop where I'd study for my math course. Last night, before the incident from my DJ, my mother really did knock on my door and ask me about 10 questions. "Are you okay?" "Were you drinking?" "How much are you drinking?" "Did you throw up?" etc. I finally asked her, "Why are you asking so many questions?" I was extremely irritated, as she had woken me up. After the hallucinations described in my DJ, I'd been wondering if maybe I had hallucinated that whole exchange too. So, before leaving, I asked her if last night she had talked to me, and she said yes. She proceeded to ask me what's going on, and before long she was half yelling at me for drinking so much. She said she heard me throwing up last night, which was complete BS. I don't know where she got that idea, I wasn't anywhere near puking and wasn't drunk enough to have forgotten something like that.

I asked her how she knew I was drinking last night anyway. At first she said, 'I could just tell', 'I just knew'. This wasn't an acceptable answer, and she finally admitted to having 'walked past my room' and seeing alcohol bottles everywhere. She said "it looks like the room of an alcoholic!" She was really angry but I was just irritated as fuck. She has no idea what I'm going through psychologically, what happened yesterday, the mental changes, and that I've decided to stop drinking. I told her not to worry about it and that I don't want to talk about this now. Her anger flared and she said "NO, YOU LIVE IN OUR HOUSE AND WE PAY FOR YOU, AND YOUR DRINKING IS CAUSING YOU TO MISS CLASSES AND SKIP VIOLIN LESSONS." It's all bullshit. I missed a single math class, but it was unimportant and I chose to skip for a reason I found valid which had nothing to do with drinking. I've always done that occasionally. And I decided to cancel an extra, free mid-week violin class that the instructor had nicely offered me to progress more quickly, because I realised it would take too long to get there and wouldn't be practical. Nothing to do with alcohol.

I can't stand when my mom does this, it does nothing but irritate me and make me feel like I'm getting "in trouble" at 22 for fuck's sake. I know that she is distressed and probably has reason to be, and cares about me (actually I don't think that at all, I think she cares about me because I'm her daughter, she doesn't actually know me enough to be able to care about the real me). But it pisses me off when she intrudes in my life like that, when she expects me to be open about something I just don't want to talk to my parents about at all. I have a life, I have things going on, I undergo mental changes and if I decide to stop drinking it will be of my own volition. The fact that she thinks she can even think about my issues and make sense of them and judge me for them, without knowing all of the factors involved, just seems incredibly naive. I think that my parents have always taken their kids' issues way more personally than they should. If I actually did start failing my classes, dropped out of school, etc. then she could begin to be concerned, but nothing of the sort is happening now.

After that I spent my entire walk trying so hard not to feel bad about what had happened, not to let her affect me, to be happy again, and it was so difficult. I listened to positive music, and finally mostly stopped caring as much. But it's still there, and if she brings it up again I know my distress over her judgments will all come back. I did study at the coffee shop and that felt so great to do, it was even fun in a way. I need to do more of that.

Good luck with quitting drinking! That'll happen if you drink too much, tolerance is a bitch. I never drank frequently but I would binge like crazy when I did and now alcohol feels like it gets me drunk for like fifteen to twenty minutes tops, and then I just get tired. :/ (But to be fair I'd already punished my body a lot by the time I started drinking, too.) Have you heard of milk thistle? It's an herb that you can probably find at any basic pharmacy over-the-counter, and probably also at herb and tea shops. It's well known to be good for detoxing, it's even used as a liver regenerative and will help reverse some of the damage of alcohol. I always take one before or after drinking just for added assurance.

I'm sorry your mother is so hard on you. I'm sure she's just worried and assumes the worst like parents do, but she should respect your privacy a little more and respect your decisions as an adult. Unfortunately, we're still our parents' children and I'm sure they'll always treat us as that in some way. :T But at least you're resolving to change some things and become healthier, when you make progress your mom will see that too. You definitely should aim to go to that coffee shop or other areas more to study if you enjoyed it so much, it'll be good assurance to know that you can feel so good about something like that.

I made Danny a kit kat cube for his birthday and I FORGOT to take a picture of it
It looked so cool, I'm so pissed!

I got the idea of a picture when I searched google images so I'll see if I can find it

edit: Ok it was like those, but without the m&ms, and imagine the lid being propped open slightly, and the whole box filled with chocolate mousse. It looked soooo cool. I love playing with chocolate.

A kit kat CUBE? :O That sounds wonderful lol.

Originally Posted by Kitties

I still feel bad for ranting a bit, it's not nearly as bad as I make it out to be and I really shouldn't be complaining at all.

No complaint to small! Remember that

Originally Posted by OpheliaBlue

I made Danny a kit kat cube for his birthday and I FORGOT to take a picture of it
It looked so cool, I'm so pissed!

I got the idea of a picture when I searched google images so I'll see if I can find it

edit: Ok it was like those, but without the m&ms, and imagine the lid being propped open slightly, and the whole box filled with chocolate mousse. It looked soooo cool. I love playing with chocolate.

That sounds incredible!

Ophelia, that sounds heavenly. Those M&M ones look really cool, too.

Originally Posted by Alyzarin

Ophelia, that sounds heavenly. Those M&M ones look really cool, too.

It was goooood. Although I like the ones in that picture, they were supposed to be Rubix Cubes.

You can make anythign out of kit kats. I'm going to do a gingerbread house for next christmas, and I'm going to put kit kats on the sides horizontally, to make it look like a log cabin. Or look like Sears Siding.

I posted, had to edit to put in quote coz you two sniped me, then I had to go back and edit again because you posted that kit kat cube with moose thing.
Then I refresh and you tow have posted again!
STOP IT!

What the bet I post this and there's already more posts since I've been writing this again.
Dammit.... nope.

Hehe, you just need to try to keep up with the pace.

Yeah it's alive in here tonight, boooooy

Originally Posted by tommo

It's like I'm just.... stuck. I was starting to get somewhere after all these years of depression and anxiety and OCD and.... just utter loneliness....
I got a job, made some good art, made a few friends, I now only have maybe 3 friends IRL, one I never see anymore, started talking more which I'd never done in my entire life,
I was about to keep studying what really interests me.
Now I'm just stuck! I can't go anywhere from here!

It sounds cliche to say this but it gets better. I say that from experience. I know depression is a real kicker, but no one is better equipped to handle it than you. Talking about what bothers you in a place like this can be really cathartic. The feedback really helps.
Oh, and you can always go someplace from here. My grandmother went back and got her Masters degree at the age of 69, long after her kids were grown. I was impressed to learn that. You have a lot of life ahead of you and a lot of room/time to improve your situation. Enjoy each day! Pick a reason to smile every time you get up, even if it's something stupid and simple like the smell of new shoes, a tasty meal, or that little mote of dust dancing in the sunshine.

Never know...you just might give yourself enough inspration to dream.

And just to rant a little...it's raining but there is no thunder! I want thunder!

Dianeva, great to hear you're gonna try quitting the drink. I'm sure it'll help your body and mind in the long run.

And ophie, what an awesome idea with the kit kats... Filled with moose though jeeeeeesus chocolate overload

It took way too long to catch up on this thread! I can barely keep up with it now that school's started again. That's why I haven't responded to anyone lately... >.>
On the other hand, I read every single post! So even if I can't respond to everyone individually I did read it, and I care. :3

God, it's such a blur... I can't even remember too many individual things people said. But I'm glad you weren't too badly hurt, Deery. o.o And Link... you sound awfully jaded sometimes. We can chat sometime, if you want. Just PM me. My advice to you is to back off on things for a bit, like... take a break from trying to LD and stuff, just for the weekend. Chill and try to have fun! You seem to set your mind on something and pursue it doggedly. That's a great trait usually, but sometimes you need to take a step back and let things happen at their own pace. Does that make sense?

to everyone that needs one. I want to be broad, but that sounds kinda generic, doesn't it? xD I would be more specific if I hadn't just read about 40 pages or something in one sitting. @_@

That's some dedication, Singularity. I can't even say I've read every post in the last few pages.

^^ same

I'm just such a slow reader.. maybe to help old farts like me, on those really looong posts, one could highlight certain key words, that would capture interest. Then I could be motivated to read the whole thing.

Thanks for the Shirley Temple laugh lol I loved all those shows when I was young.

Dianeva, yep; I ate 5 pieces of pizza and thankfully, it caused no further pain. Sorry about everything you're going through with your mom. Is there a particular reason you don't want to open up to her? She assumes because she only has her own thoughts and worst imaginings to work with. Talking to her could make her feel better which could make you feel better in the long run when she's no longer harping on you.

Ophelia, those cubes look absolutely delightful but yours sounds even better

Singularity, that's quite some dedication (or true boredom ). I understand how you feel. When I've missed a day or so and read everything I'm like: "Now WHO said this and that again?" I'll remember the rant but not who said it so then I feel compelled to open a new window and look for it. I'm glad to see you're alive and well.

My rant is that I just woke up. I had another headache last night and was crashing in my chair again while playing EQ2 so I just gave up and went to bed at around 9:30 I FEEL like I slept all day yesterday, but all in all, it came to about just under 12 hours. My stomach woke me at 4:30 and I now feel pretty wide awake.
I dreamed of my Uncle Eddy which was nice.

Anyhow.... another rant is that I'm going to have a very busy day. I pick up Destinee at 10:30, visit Zee from 12:1, visit Myles from 1:15-2:15 (if I don't get too lost). I have to have Destinee back by 6:30 but I'll probably drop her off by 4 because driving all the way home then back to drop her off is just stupid- even though she desperately wants to come home.

She wants to see her friends, but she's not even supposed to while in Placement. She's supposed to go into Foster Care next month, but they haven't found her a place yet so she's worried about transitioning. She does NOT need to come home!!!! Though I would love having her here it's just NOT in her best interest with the bad elements around. She's a people pleaser and gets involved in serious (yet unhealthy) relationships too quickly and I'm not a good enough parent to prevent it. With me living in my little room, I don't even know what happens in the rest of the house.

That realization makes me recognize my youngest has no right to come home. Her problems are more severe with her drug addiction. But she's my baby and out of all the kids, I bonded more with her. And she shows her love for the me the most. I've known since she was a baby that she's going to be the one who ultimately "breaks my heart" (all parents have at least 1 kid that does it seems). But would I rather her hate me and go on to live a fulfilled life (by sending her elsewhere) or do I think about the here and now and let her come home in a year when she's finished with her program?
Ah well, I'll worry about that when the time comes.

A more pressing concern is that Zee's placement wants her to have surgery on her shoulder. I have mixed feelings about that. Zee says her fingers are always cold because the circulation is so bad in that arm BUT, I've researched her problem and once she has surgery it's a surgery that most people will have to undergo again and again and again for the rest of their lives. Her last 2 doctors did NOT recommend it for that reason. Who's going to pay for these surgeries once she's an adult? BUT, if her circulation is THAT bad, then maybe it's the only option at this point.
I need to talk to her people to find out exactly what's going on.

Originally Posted by melanieb

It sounds cliche to say this but it gets better. I say that from experience. I know depression is a real kicker, but no one is better equipped to handle it than you. Talking about what bothers you in a place like this can be really cathartic. The feedback really helps.
Oh, and you can always go someplace from here. My grandmother went back and got her Masters degree at the age of 69, long after her kids were grown. I was impressed to learn that. You have a lot of life ahead of you and a lot of room/time to improve your situation. Enjoy each day! Pick a reason to smile every time you get up, even if it's something stupid and simple like the smell of new shoes, a tasty meal, or that little mote of dust dancing in the sunshine.

Never know...you just might give yourself enough inspration to dream.

And just to rant a little...it's raining but there is no thunder! I want thunder!

Oh hi there newbie, I like you
Seriously though, thanks, it made me realise I have been way too depressed lately, and I didn't even realise it until now!
Thankyou! I will try to be happy for something every day.

Originally Posted by Pensive Patrick

And ophie, what an awesome idea with the kit kats... Filled with moose though jeeeeeesus chocolate overload

WAAAAA?????? That's the BEST PART! haha, otherwise it's just kit kats. The moose is just a perfect overload of goodness.

Singularity - You're insane.


lol

extended discussion is fast becoming a propaganda tool for hypocrites.
there's nothing positive in that section at all. maybe if i put this in bold, red lettering someone will pay attention to it.

Originally Posted by greenhavoc

extended discussion is fast becoming a propaganda tool for hypocrites.
there's nothing positive in that section at all. maybe if i put this in bold, red lettering someone will pay attention to it.

My University got some major flooding last night, I think up to at least 5 feet?

Too much rain man...

Oh man that bruise I got on my butt last week is horrible. Truly horrible. I will post a pic later.

Zhay, once again your problems are a little over my head right now, but I wish you luck.

Link, I wish we had that much rain, I could definitely use some more.

Ophelia, that sucks! :T I hope it starts getting better soon!

Originally Posted by Linkzelda41

My University got some major flooding last night, I think up to at least 5 feet?

Too much rain man...

Here in Austin I don't think it rained that much. I think you got the worst of it. News said it rained like 6.5" in Thorndale.

I love storms, and we missed out. I hate to see people flooded but heavy rain is an awesome event.

My fucking throat. I lost my voice. For 3 days my throat felt weird and I slept from 9:30pm to noon today .-. it's been so bad since last night, i can't talk, swallow, cough, or anything without my throat killing me. I feel so weak and have no energy. It hurts even if I just sit here. Still don't have my computer. And on top of all of this my braces still hurt, I can't sleep with my mouth shut because of my bite plate so my mouth is really dry, then i get a lot of saliva and i literally have to spit in the sink for 5 minutes. Though the sharp pains from the molar bands are hurting less, thank goodness >_<