Here's my EPIC PHAIL:

I am in a forest in the Northwestern U.S. I am sawing my arm, but it turns into a log. A huge arm-log. I saw the log. The log squirts blood. 'HAHAHA I DID THE TASK OF THE MONTH. I MADE A LOG SQUIRT BLOOD!' HAHAHAHA I WIN. I AM THE MOST ADVANCED LUCID DREAMER ON THE PLANET.

Absinthe, The Green Fairy appears. "You idiot. You just drank some absinthe at the Club Nexus. Don't you remember. This is a hallucination in a dream."

"I am DREEEEEEEEEEEEEAMING!" I scream. I fly into the sky, and make the clouds turn into ice cream. I eat the ice cream with a bunch of cows. It feels weird. Not the ice cream, but eating it with flying cows.

The cows have a weird sky game of a sport like football using cowpies. Monkeys ride on the cows' backs, trying to fling poo into a goal.

I start laughing my ass off, and rolling around in the sky.

I wake up in the Biodome, and hit myself in the head.