Blue_Opossum

Morning of August 9, 2018. Thursday.

Reading time: 2 min 20 sec. Readability score: 60.



I naturally flow into the state I call apex lucidity. Usually, though, the state has to be reinitiated by creating and going through a door (or window) that is deemed difficult to open or phase through. (I sometimes end up sliding an entire wall like a sliding door before being fully integrated into this extremely vivid state.)

In this case, I effortlessly slide out of the illusion of my dream-rendered physical body into my apex body. From here, I phase through a window onto the ground outside. I look back through the window. The setting is incorrect in several ways, despite the augmented realism. Firstly, it seems to be the Gellibrand Street apartment in Clayfield, where we have not lived in years (and it has not been there in reality for years). Secondly, it was not possible to look through the window from the ground level at that address. Thirdly, rather than the driveway, it seems more like the space north of the Loomis Street house in America. Fourthly, the bed was never oriented this way as in the dream. The bed’s head was always out from the window, never the side. (Since childhood, my dreams render everything incorrectly in as many different ways as possible other than literally prescient threads, which makes me wonder why anyone would bother with “interpretation” in the typical use of the word, especially as dreams are typically reactive representations of the dream state itself.)

Even so, I keep studying the bed where Zsuzsanna and a baby are sleeping. I keep puzzling over the situation because I do not see my real physical body in the bed (which should be to the right of Zsuzsanna and our baby) as I expect to. It makes me uncertain, and I question if I am “still” in my body and ended up falling out the window in reality. (This makes no sense either, as Zsuzsanna would have been blocking me from rolling over and out the window, so that is already the fifth error here.) I am temporarily absentminded and had already forgotten that my original dream body that I supposedly came out of is not my real body either.

Still, I soon gain back my apex state after this brief lapse. Even so, I feel what seems like an invisible cat wrapping around my left leg, impeding my walking out to the public sidewalk. I consider that one of our cats is probably on my leg in reality as I sleep. (Though this was not the case, it was just illusory.) I try to shake it off without waking myself, and I do, curiously, without a hypnopompic kick resulting. I continue walking into an open area that is more like another place we had lived years ago, on Duffy Street. (As I had written in other entries, walking is more challenging and blissful in apex states than flying is in lower states, one reason being that walking is closer to ordinary consciousness in the highest lucid state with a more defined vestibular system correlation that is not as illusory as flying. Therefore, stable walking signifies far more control of RAS mediation than flying does.)

Soon, I shift into the summoning state of lucidity as typically begins every sleep cycle. About six young, unfamiliar servants walk toward me and coalesce into my dream self. Coming out instantly at that point, I decide not to return. I feel energized. Once again, I consider how realistic the state is in physicality and overall fullness of self.

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Morning of May 28, 2018. Monday.



On my way back to waking reality by way of a passenger train (autosymbolism for both the induction and waking process), I decide to walk after remaining in passive lucidity. I hover above my seat and phase through the train as in past dreams (though in this case, actively flying ahead to phase through the front of the train rather than just letting it phase through me while I hover in a fetal position) and walk through an isolated grove, feeling a deep sense of peace and love as both my returning memory and realization of Zsuzsanna being near me in bed breaks through the liminal space barrier of the illusory dream state.

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I first developed an understanding of the illusory nature of the dream state at age three (probably why I rarely have “bad” dreams unless related to health by way of transpersonal premonitory threads). Since then, I have phased through hundreds of vehicles, including the roofs of taxis, usually entering lucid omnipresence as here. This is all about vestibular system correlation and a vehicle being an autosymbolic illusory projection of the physical body in REM sleep. However, even walking is not what I am doing in reality, as I am asleep at the time, but walking is closer to the preconscious transition than riding a train is.

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