memorable

I had a good number of dreams last night but I only wrote this one down.... I need to stop being lazy. But, at least this one was sort of fun.

Drawing As A Means Of Summoning? [DILD]

I don't remember the dream up to the part where I became lucid or even a little bit after it, just that it was at a school. I walked down some hallway to a door that should've led to a classroom, but instead it opened up to the stage of some TV game show with a full audience and everything. I was kind of nervous that walking through this door alone would make the dream unstable, so I went to grab a DC to take with me. I walked back out of the hall and found M and grabbed her hand and got her to follow me back. As I was running down the hall with M behind me I thought to myself something along the lines of "She better still be M when I turn around and see her again." and when we got to the door I checked and she was, but upon going through the door I noticed that it just led to a regular classroom now. I guess she wasn't what I should have been worried about changing. I got kind of mad and decided to take my feelings out on the unsuspecting room full of DCs, so I walked up to the chalkboard and drew a cat, like a really basic cat like you would expect a child to draw. I then wrote next to it "ATTACK!" and underlined it twice, and stepped back from the board. The cat's eyes suddenly went from normal circles to an angry expression, and then it crouched back and leapt off of the board, in slow motion, over on to one of the desks a DC was sitting at. Unfortunately, it was still slow and weak-willed, and the DC just kind of brushed it off. ._. I guess I should probably plan that out a little better next time, maybe draw a tiger or something instead. At that point I noticed that the dream was starting to become unstable as the environment seemed to be breaking into strange red runes that would flash all over the place chaotically, so I just started moving around grabbing things and DCs trying to regain some sensory input and re-stabilize things. It did increase the vividness somewhat, it saved the dream temporarily, but this part also gets kind of fuzzy. I also remember (and I THINK this was after the cat stuff, but I'm not 100% sure...) getting really horny and feeling the urge to masturbate, and I almost started but then I realized that that would be a totally pointless use of a lucid dream and it would probably wake me up. I also groped some girl with gigantic breasts for the fun of it at one point, I think it was right after that lol. Shortly after that (or the other thing if that happened before it, but I'm pretty sure that was last), I woke up.

This dream definitely made me consider some new aspects of summoning, like I put in the title. I wonder what else I could bring to life like that....

So Fucking Close [Non-Lucid]

This dream....

There was a lot of stuff going on in this dream, but I only remember the ending where I was sitting in what I'm pretty sure was some kind of auditorium, on the stage with my legs hanging over the edge. I think that's right, I just didn't pay a whole lot of attention to those details at the time.... But anyway, I was sitting next to Jesus and we were about to smoke a joint together. Yes, it was literally about to be that awesome, but then it just got snatched away from me.... I tried lighting the joint and it didn't burn correctly. In fact, the flame spread across the entire joint near instantaneously, though somehow I was able to shake it off and it looked perfectly normal again. In addition to this, I didn't get any smoke at all from my hit, so I knew something was wrong with it. I even let Jesus try to take a hit but the same thing happened to him and he couldn't get anything out of it. I tried one last time but then just gave up and decided to roll a new one. However, the bud didn't really feel like cooperating. I was breaking it up, but the pieces were becoming useless (like going from some crystally chunk to a totally bland green leaf fragment) or just warping all together into other objects, like tiny, colored transparent pieces of plastic. Before I could really figure out a way to resolve this situation, I woke up.

God damn it.

Nasty Things [Hypnagogic Hallucinations]

Last night I decided to try out some binaural beats meditation just for the heck of it, I've had a light and sound machine that can do it for a couple years now but I usually forget about the audio track and just use the visual settings. I put it on a ten minute run for a relaxing setting and it felt pretty awesome... I came out it buzzing. After it shut off I took out the headphones and just kept lying there for a little bit, and then out of the darkness behind my eyelids came a bug, something like a cockroach or a hornet, that started flying around my vision. My first reaction was "Ew!", but then I remembered that, unfortunately, bugs are an important breakthrough sign for me. Watching these bugs crawl along my vision has led to short OBEs before, and one time even resulted in brief but complex audio and visual hallucinations after snapping back to my body. The mild colorful static I normally see in the dark had taken on a depth and I was starting to see a wispy white outline of what appeared to be the inside of a vehicle with an entity or two moving around, but the image never became clear or well-defined. I think I got too distracted with the bug, it's been a good while since that happened. Soon it all faded back into regular darkness.

Oh well, next time.

Side Notes - This lucid is actually from September 27th, I just never took the time to type it up until now.

My Sandbox [MILD]

The main thing I remember about the first part of this dream was that I was at home and we were throwing a party with lots of my family members and old teachers attending. After everyone had pretty much left I was just hanging out in my room and I saw my 11th grade physics teacher coming up to the door through the window so I went to go meet him. I think he also morphed into some random guy at one point.... I went and opened the front door and he wasn't there, and upon seeing that I immediately became lucid. I randomly decided to climb the tree in our front yard, so I sprinted towards it and just ran up it. I'm pretty sure the geometry of this experience was beyond alien, my memory is quite confusing, but eventually I was just standing up on a high point of the tree. I looked up into the sky and saw a car slowly floating through the air way off in the distance and was confused for a second, but I decided I probably shouldn't let myself get distracted with that or the dream will fade. (I've gotten this feeling while staring into the sky while lucid before.) I took one last look at the car and then back down to the ground. Extending out in front of me was a long and incredibly thick tree branch that seemed to be made to resemble the shape of a slide. There was even a little cupped part at the bottom. I slid down and the branch moved to help get me gently on to the ground. I turned around and noticed that the branch was actually in the shape of an arm, and the cupped part was the tree holding its hand like that to assist me. I reached out and shook this massive hand and smiled, the tree seemed nice. I had landed in the road and there was a car coming right for where I was standing, so I crouched down and spread my arms out to try and hold it off. When it collided with me I was pushed back slightly, but mostly I was able to push the force of the impact to the side and the car ended up smashing through the front yard of the house across the street from mine. I turned around and saw their fence running along the side of the street, so I jumped up to it and started running along the top. I was headed toward the nearby alleyway but as I looked at the houses over there my vision started to get really white and blurry and I was afraid that the dream might be ending. I turned around and saw a truck with a pretty empty back turning the corner on to a nearby street (the one that extends directly out from our house, we live at a three-way intersection). I held out my hand and yelled "Stop!" and the driver immediately slammed on the breaks. Then I clenched my fingers almost into a fist as a way of doing a sort of telekinetic or magnetic pull and it totally worked. I was pulled by an invisible force on to the back of the truck and I reached over to pat its side and said "Alright, let's go." We started moving, and I vaguely remember leaning over and starting to say something to the driver and/or passenger, but then I woke up.

Fun night.

Just A Pleasant Head Trip [Trip Report]
Cannabis
Date: September 11th, 2012

Dose:
repeated, smoked, Cannabis (plant material)

I packed an almost-filled bowl of something close to Mexican brick weed, but not quite as bricky, into my bong some time around 5:00 PM. This was to be the first of my experiences with cannabis after deciding to return to treating it as a psychedelic and something to be done occasionally rather than an all-day-every-day kind of high. I'd taken a short break before this so my tolerance was a bit lower than normal. I quickly downed a couple big rips and set the bong down. Lucky me, I tend to get psychedelic effects from smoking fairly easily, and the schwaggier the bud the more schizo it seems to make me.

Come-up anxiety tries to make itself known, but is quickly dismissed. Weed is nothing to fear. Somehow in the fog of the peak I became stuck on how trippy of a thought it was that we are literally the only species in the whole world that has come anywhere even remotely near as far as we have. I started considering all the strange things we as humans do to have fun, and how to any other species it must all just seem like complete absurdity. Like thinking about it from the point of view of an advanced alien race who has evolved to be extremely intelligent but still only focus on what needs to be done to survive and expand, having them come to Earth and seeing us going to clubs and dancing, and all that kind of stuff that would just seem totally pointless because we only do it because it's fun, and just wondering WHY those things are fun.... Like why is dancing fun? It just is. >w< But anyway, that made me think about what it'd be like for some random animal like a rat to be wandering through a rave or club, and then THAT made me think about what it would be like to be a human who was raised in the wild and never learned language so they act more like an animal wandering through a club. How would they feel? I began getting a strong mental imagery accompanying this, sort of like a third-person dream. A teenage boy who grew up in the wild unleashed in a club, the first thing he notices is all the people dancing around, especially the pretty girls dancing with guys. He's still a human so he's going to want to try to get in on the action, right? Would he learn to start dancing with everyone even without language? To be honest, I think he would... he may screw up a few times at first, but I think he'd learn. Thinking about that gave me sort of a sense of connection to my animal nature, just considering all the things we still do just because it's fun and we have an urge to let loose. It seems more complex than what animals do because there are so many different variables to consider in our situations, but it's all still the same kinds of instincts. The world really is a crazy, crazy place.

After I realized how couch-locked I'd been during all of that, I decided to get up and go out to the backyard and appreciate nature a bit. The weather outside felt amazing and it was very easy to feel in tune with everything. I wandered around looking at the tree and the garden a bit, and I got a couple pictures of things that really stood out to me.

First there are these leaves, which totally rock. They've got a nice fractally look to them, if you ask me. I could stare at them for ages.

And this mini rose, which is just wonderful. Look at the swirl, nature is so intensely beautiful.... I felt like crying when I first got a look at that flower....

That was about the end of significant parts of the experience. Weed is still the number one psychedelic in my book.

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Approaching the Void [Trip Report]
Salvia divinorum
Date: August 10th, 2012

Dose:
T+0:00: 1 hit, smoked, Salvia divinorum (100 mg extract)

Last night, after my parents went to bed, I decided to get out the salvia I'd been holding on to for a while now. The extract I have is standardized to contain 100 mg of salvinorin A per gram, and if you know anything about salvinorin A then you'll know that's a lot! I wanted to be cautious as it had been at least a year and a half (if not more) since the last time I smoked salvia or really did anything like it, so I loaded a very small amount of it into one of my bongs that I've found to mask the taste and (usually) harshness of just about anything very well. This is significant, because salvia tastes pretty nasty and you often need big hits to get appreciable effects out of it. After filling it with water and preparing myself, I grabbed my torch lighter and took it all in one inhale.

I've read many reports of people smoking salvia and saying they always get a slow come-up, or they gets lots of psychedelic-like visuals over reality. While salvia has given me those things before, the first time in a session always hits me like a train with no warning whatsoever, and is nothing but pure dissociative ego loss. I was sitting upright on my bed after I put the bong down, and by the time I let out the hit I was already slipping away. My first thought, which I actually voiced, was "I remember this now." I think I at least mostly understood that when I said it. There was this feeling of approaching the void that salvia always gives me, like I was about to be unplugged from reality. Of course, higher doses actually put you in the void... but that's another story. I wasn't really sure whether or not I was hallucinating at the time, but I do recall that the left door to my room closet and the front-right corner of the bed (from my perspective) had now taken on distinctly humanoid personae, and I spent the rest of the trip talking half to them and half to no one in particular. I felt that they were trying to explain the situation to me, and I responded "Oh, I guess I should wait my turn. I'm supposed to just lie down like this?", after which I knelt down forward on to the bed, not actually fully changing from my sitting position. Immediately after I shot back up and asked "Wait, I'm in control of this, right?" This was a meaningless question, my ego's last attempt to save itself. At the time I wouldn't even have been able to tell you who I was. I felt (mistakenly) affirmed that I was indeed in control, and I so I got back down and rested the side of my face on the bed. I believe I was just waiting for the trip to start (a strange sensation I often get on low doses of salvia), but then shortly afterward cognition started returning to me and I realized that it was already ending. I got up and had an increased amount of energy while walking around, and I couldn't help giving in to the strange feeling of gravity constantly pulling me to the left and ended up twirling around a bit. Shortly thereafter, I returned to full sobriety.

This trip was weak but significant because it reminded me of something that I used to know, but that had been lost to hazy memories and too much drug use: With salvia, you either go for broke or you go home. Like I said, my first time in the session is always just an experience with the void, and afterwards I tend to get more powerful sensory hallucinations. I wanted to see if I could work around that by starting small, but I forgot that not experiencing that feeling all the way just makes me not want to do it again because it feels like I'm still going to have to break through before I get to anything worthwhile, so I might as well get the discomfort out of the way in the beginning. I won't be forgetting next time.

#1 - When Did We Become A Resort? [Non-Lucid]

I don't recall too much about this dream, but I do remember that I was with my family staying at some sort of resort, except the setting was actually just our house. There was some woman in a fancy (and shiny, if memory serves) dress doing inspections around the house/resort, so I had to make sure to hide all of the drug-related stuff in my room before she got there so I wouldn't get in trouble. There had been a lot of drug nonsense going on earlier in the parts of the dream I can't really remember, but I do remember a flash of flying a magic carpet through skyscrapers in a downtown area on LSD. Anyway, the lady showed up and did her inspection, and all that really comes back about it was that I had the slightest desire to try to steal the woman's body from her. There was also some comment about how people kept trying to give us these rectangular cheesecake slices for free, claiming that they were "flannel cake", because it was his birthday. After that, I woke up.

#2 - My Demon Pals [Non-Lucid]

I was walking around my old high school/a wedding that a bunch of people I knew from school were at. Walking around with me were two demon spirits: a skinny, normal-looking guy except for the fact that his face (and especially eyes) just gave off that feeling of evil, and a big, buff guy wearing a fedora and with a cannon for an (at least one) arm. Cannon guy was causing mayhem by shooting cannonballs everywhere, and I was just laughing. There may have been some of my normal friends with me too, but it's hard to remember now. I saw this girl I've known since really early in school, KR, running by me in a wedding dress holding a leash and a long wire for some reason, and I took the wire from her and kept running alongside her. A bunch of other people from the school started running with us and I had the feeling that we were racing each other to this one special location we were all headed towards, just to be like we were carefree kids again like in school. That was fun. However, that image was becoming fainter as it went on, and then I woke up into sleep paralysis. My entire room felt like it was encompassed with a powerful energy, things were constantly pulsing and waving, and my vision was somewhat blurry and distorted, and a bit doubled. There was also a loud white noise that sounded like some kind of demonic language, and occasionally words could be pulled out of it but they didn't have any meaning. I was lying on my back so it was hard to look too far down, but I saw the same skinny demon spirit from the dream standing at the end of my bed, staring at me with those evil eyes. Hey there, specter. I reached out a fantasy arm to him (as my real one was still quite paralyzed), and I felt my imaginary limb twist and bend along with the rest of the energy in the room. The demon just stared at me longer and I tried to give him an "Aw, come on." type of face, but then it all faded away and I was just lying in bed normally. Too bad, I would've liked to see where that could've gone. >w<

Supplement Dose: 10 mg Melatonin, 50 mg Zinc, 250 mg Choline, 100 mg Vitamin B6

#1 - Hyperdimensional Tentacled Alien Reality Factory [Non-Lucid]

This dream was fairly long if I remember correctly, but as it was early in the night and has a significant ending I've forgotten much of the beginning. My old friend D and I were back at our middle school, though we were still our same ages as now and didn't seem to think much of it. We got in my car, which was parked right in front of the school (in the parking lot), and we drove probably less than 100 feet, parked in a different spot, and got out and started walking back to my house instead. The park in between the school and my house seemed odd; the layouts of everything were arranged incorrectly and there was a ridiculous amount of very confusing construction going on. It seemed that in every direction there were lines of constantly moving shapes and out-of-place colors and textures (which is kind of hard to describe). The trees in the forest also took a very different path than they actually do. Of course none of this tipped me off to anything, I just turned to D and said something along the lines of "Wait, why are we walking? We could just go back to the car and drive there." We went back and got in and slowly got on the road in line with the other constantly-moving vehicles, though we had to drive on the sidewalk over lots of construction to do it, and we became part of the Escheresque conveyer belt just like everything else. As we approached the area where there was normally a bridge that crosses through the foresty part of the park, instead we were carried (because the road dropped, so we were more like floating now but it was more of a telekinetic pulling sensation) through what I can really only describe as some kind of yellowish-beige hyperdimensional caverns that also appeared to be some sort of fantasy town filled with enormous (like, their heads were bigger than my car) tentacled but vaguely humanoid alien monsters that emitted an aura of being some kind of hyperspatial entities with various astral powers. As we were pulled further into this it became clear that all of this was actually just part of a gigantic plane of perception that existed as a singular object which was simply modifying its own structure but was still just one thing.... And then my recall fades out and soon I woke up. X)

#2 - New Phantasy Star Dungeons [Non-Lucid]

I was hanging out with N, R, and J, and R and J had been playing Phantasy Star Universe apparently and N was showing me how we could use our PSPs to connect our Phantasy Star Online (which is not even a PSP game) files to their Universe files and together we could all play on brand new maps, including an insanely detailed forest where we fought a boss that I can't remember now, and sort of a Star Ocean-like medieval town that was in a circular shape and caved in to a sewage drain in the middle where we battled some kind huge red robot monster that was designed to have these really curvy claws and body structures.... Also hard to describe, but I thought it looked cool. >w< However, R and J had passed out for most of it, and N was slipping in and out of consciousness, so for the most part it was either him and I or just me playing. Near the end, N commented about how we need to "slow down on the rum" for some reason, but then I woke up.

Dream Fragment - I don't think this dream ever fully formed, it really was a legitimate framgent. What I do remember is that I'm pretty sure Linkzelda was there and we were talking about schizophrenia, and I vaguely recall either putting on or already wearing a two-piece bathing suit that releases dopamine, which sounds insanely awesome. XD

#3 - Karaoke Game [Non-Lucid]

My cousin K and some friend of hers had left a karaoke game at my house and I played it with her friend since K had already left I suppose, but I didn't really know any of the few songs they had already unlocked so I wasn't doing very well. Later the girl just kind of vanished and I went to turn off the game, originally thinking it was in my GameCube but then realizing that it actually had its own system set up next to it. I looked through the menus a bit more and noticed that it was a Disney game and the characters were all kids and moms. I specifically remember seeing a little boy based on Mickey and a tall, completely black-and-shiny-skinned voluptuous woman based on Minnie. o.o I turned the game off and wandered into the kitchen and started getting really nauseous for some reason. I looked at the clock and noticed that it was almost 11:30 AM, and I thought to myself that it must be because of all the dream aids I took. () I went to grab a cookie to eat to try to make the nausea pass, but then I woke up, thankfully not nauseous for real.

Spoiler for Reflections:

Well, this was an interesting night. First of all, all of the dreams were extremely vivid, even the fragment as much as it possibly could be. There were multiple times throughout them where I had to read things off of various surfaces and it was all 100% clear and legible. Background details such as the placement of objects in my house were also highly accurate, and even included things like the container full of cookies that were only added to the environment within the last couple of days, and the GameCube in the living room that I've only used like once since moving it out there recently. As for the purpose of the experiment.... Are my dreams subconsciously forming the way I want them to? Yes, I would say so. (Especially the bathing suit that releases dopamine, ohmygod yes. ) There was definitely more of an alien quality to them, particularly the first two, and the way reality was pieced together in basically all of them matches ways that I would want to influence them (it's kind of hard put into words how, though). The first one was just amazing, it feels like it's been forever since I had a dream like that.... Take me back to the factory, oh magical tentacled overlords!

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Supplement Dose: 10 mg Melatonin, 50 mg Zinc

Spoiler for Why I Took These Supplements:

I've decided to start a new experimental regimen. I've been doing a lot of thinking about the connections between hallucinogens and dreaming, especially after doing a lot of research and testing with menthol, and what it's really brought me to is the relationship between dopamine and prolactin. As far as I can tell, dopamine is like the chemical of the subconscious.... It connects us to our thoughts and desires, brings our imaginations to life. Prolactin, on the other hand, controls how much desire we actually have, and I mean that on a rather deep, subconscious level. Dopamine and prolactin are normally inversely correlated, but they can both be active at the same time. My theory was that having both dopamine and prolactin going would make for a more general enhancement of a dream or hallucinatory experience, but it would also make them rather wild and uncontrollable, or at the very least impulsive. Dopamine, however, while it is very impulsive in its own right, would allow for an experience that more naturally formed around our desires when not inhibited by prolactin.

For example, I recently decided to do research into the pro- or anti-prolactinergic effects of various psychedelics. The well-known ones that I've experimented with that I was able to find information on include DMT, psilocin (from mushrooms), and LSD. DMT and psilocin each give me trips that are totally uncontrollable, and often are alien and bizarre. Psilocin gives me me a considerably more "connected" trip than DMT, and is often very sexual and shows me amazing visions that do reflect my subconscious, but overall it's more like I'm going along for the ride than anything. LSD is a totally different story. Whenever I'm on LSD, reality forms to my desires without me even having to do anything; the world simply bends and twists until it's reshaped itself to explore my every fantasy. It's not a conscious method of control like using powers in a lucid dream, it works on the subconscious level in the sense that the dream-like state itself is formed in exactly the way that you would form it if you were doing it manually, and since it's just happening for you and your subconscious is creating it it's even better than you could possibly create with your conscious mind. Unsurprisingly (to me, anyway), DMT and psilocin increase prolactin levels, while LSD decreases them.

So how does this apply to the supplements? Well, I got to thinking.... Menthol raises prolactin levels and potentiates D2 responses. This is why I believe it creates some of the same connection to desires as dopamine (like the sexual effects), but it also makes them more sensual than fiendish, and it adds lots of visual effects like RobStar commonly mentions. It also definitely does make me more impulsive while lucid, and there's certainly nothing wrong with this; the "pure" sexual feeling is one I've already grown quite fond of. However, I still have the desire to test my theories further and see what a high-dopamine/low-prolactin state of dreaming would be like. This is difficult to do normally.... Drugs that increase prolactin tend to increase REM (like menthol), whereas drugs that increase dopamine tend to decrease REM. However, that doesn't mean there's not a way around it. The plus side is that increased dopaminergic activity itself will decrease prolactin levels if unopposed, so all that's really required is to find a way to raise dopamine levels and increase REM at the same time.

That's where the supplements come in. Melatonin directly opposes the effects of dopamine, particularly at D2, to suppress REM and induce non-REM sleep. Therefore, the REM rebound effect it creates later is the result of a direct increase in the dopaminergic activity of dreams to make up for lost time. So that's how that works. Zinc is another cool one, I think. Zinc is an NMDA antagonist, and this alone may add something to it but it's not my main goal; however, it does mean that chronic use of zinc will upregulate D2 receptors, and that should make for more enhanced dreaming overall. In addition, zinc appears to be a positive allosteric modulator of dopamine receptors, especially D1 and D2. This means that it doesn't actually provide any effects by itself and will not create a dopaminergic response (i.e., it won't wake you up), but it will enhance the ability of agonists at the receptor such as dopamine to create their response. So in other words, it makes the dopamine at those receptors more effective. It's also known to decrease prolactin levels with continued use. Together, I believe these two supplements, especially in chronic use, may be able to give me the kinds of effects I'm looking for. I'm also planning to add new ones to the stack to increase the effect, such as vitamin B6 to increase the production of dopamine where the brain needs it, and vitamin E to further reduce prolactin levels. I'm also considering going on the no fap challenge during this (which is why I've listed the entry as "Day 0", as I'm already unable to officially start today) so that my dopamine receptors become more sensitive and my daily prolactin levels drop. Hopefully, this will turn out to be a very successful endeavor and give me dreams that are more tailored to my desires without me even having to intervene!

#1 - Latex And Superpowers [Non-Lucid]

There was a lot going in this dream leading up to this point, but where my memory really comes in was at a cafeteria on a college campus. I was really late for lunch so even though I looked around a bit I didn't really get to eat anything. At one point I went and waited by a doorway for M who was apparently on the other side of the wall but being held up by something, and it randomly occurred to me that I was wearing something like this:

Though, I can't remember if it was those colors exactly; I didn't pay much attention to myself. Two other girls walked up also wearing latex outfits and heels and I recognized them as more friends of M. Eventually the three of us decided to go see what was taking M so long and "get her out of trouble". (I wrote that in my notes, followed by "(they thought she was too young)", but I'm not exactly sure what it means now.) After a short talk I guess I forgot about M, and my friend J walked up and tried to kiss me on the cheek, which really weirded me out considering that it was coming from him. Our mutual friend S who was a grade below us in school was there too, and she claimed that she decided to get "happy and drunk". I randomly jumped up on her back so she was giving me a piggyback ride, and I told her that with me there we'd be able to phase through walls so she didn't have to worry about that. We started walking through walls randomly and talking about college, but around that time the dream was starting to become unstable, and soon I woke up.

Visualization came extremely easily after this dream. I probably could've done a WILD if I wanted to, but I was sort of focused on something when I woke up.

#2 - The Amazing Future Smeargle [Non-Lucid]

This entire dream took place in third-person, and thus a lot of it is hard to recall now. I had the feeling that I was playing some new Pokémon game, but it was just that the screen was taking up my entire perception. Essentially, the plot was about some insanely powerful Smeargle who was completely dominating all of the Pokémon in the world in the future, and so the legendary beasts sent it back in time to get rid of it, but as a result others followed it to continue trying to beat it while certain organizations were trying to capture it for themselves. By this point in the game I already had it on my team, along with a few other fully-trained Pokémon, but I can't really remember what they were now (but I do remember something about fighting the legendary beasts). The Smeargle really was kicking ass; I'm pretty sure its moves were Fire Blast, SolarBeam, I want to say maybe Earthquake, and something else I don't quite recall now.... A terrible spread, but it was doing pretty well in-game. X) Not long after a battle ended, I woke up.

Also, thanks for the idea for this, RobStar. It's going to come in handy.

Spoiler for Preliminary Reflections:

Alright, so day 0.... The first dream interests me the most, though the second one is worth noting too. I haven't really had third-person dreams of that caliber in a while now, and I have to wonder if that was related to increased D2 activity. Melatonin has definitely given me some OBE-like dreams before. But, like I said, it's the first dream that I find really significant. First of all, this is the second time recently where I've felt that consequences weren't quite so important and just jumped on someone's back. However, in the first one I was trying to be playful, even if I was doing so in sort of an odd way, and I had reason to believe that nothing mattered because I was "back in time". In this one I just totally didn't care at all, and I knew that we'd be able to phase through walls easily. The rules of reality definitely didn't apply to me in this dream, and I was aware of it somehow. At no point did I become lucid, at least not fully if this counts at all. It was more of a... "this is my reality" type of feeling. Furthermore, there's the matter of the latex outfits.... It's entirely possible that this is just incubation from the sexy hawt females thread, but nothing of that sort has ever really happened to me before. I can say for sure that the incidence of myself and other girls wearing those outfits increasing definitely correlates with what I would expect from increased dopamine and decreased prolactin (and it in fact extremely accurately reflects some of my LSD experiences ).

So, of course, this is only the very first trial, and it's far too early to say anything yet. However, those are my current thoughts. I can't wait to see what kind of dreams I have tonight!

#1 - What Is This Game!? [DILD]

I was going to see my old, old friend from day care, CC, at high school (I did actually know him for that long, too). We were in my old junior and senior year history teacher's class, but the whole thing was being treated like college. I asked him if that was his class and he said no, so I just wandered out and started walking through the hallways alone. I don't remember this part very well but people were apparently playing some game everywhere in the classrooms I was walking through, because just as I was becoming lucid I half-yelled "What is this game!?", jokingly, and some guy tried to tell me about how in manga they're always eating food. Some really attractive girl started trying to say something to me too but I had other things in mind, so I just hugged her and then kept moving along, but the sensation had been too vivid... the rush was causing the dream to collapse. I tried to stop it as usual, but it was too late and I woke up.

#2 - Back In Time [Non-Lucid]

I was with JRE and ET, and I somehow knew that we had gone back in time to what was technically I think my junior high school years, but we were treating it like senior high. He started out in some empty lab classroom and started messing around with stuff, though I don't recall what now, until some teacher got mad at us so we walked out into the hallway. There was the strangest sense of freedom here... everything was so vivid and clear and I had an underlying knowledge that none of my actions would have any consequences whatsoever. Essentially, I had everything that a lucid dream has except for the actual lucidity; I still believed everything around me to be real. One of JRE's old teachers saw him in the hall and yelled "An enemy!" in a joking manner, which JRE hesitated for at first but then laughed at when he realized what was going on. There was a very surreal feeling to the environment, and near a classroom I ran into this girl who looks absolutely NOTHING like my most recent college professor for a summer class I just finished, SJ, but I immediately recognized it as her and perceived her as just a younger version of herself, since we were back in time. She was thin and really attractive and had a curly blonde ponytail, and I was instantly smitten (of course). But before talking to her, we walked into the classroom and I saw EC, an old friend of mine who I haven't heard from in years. She asked us about our senior year and told us what she's been up to lately, claiming that she's "Japanese now". She then wanted to ask us more about our lives but her class was starting, so I made the excuse that I had to go and walked back out in the hallway to meet up with SJ, abandoning JRE and ET. Even though I had no idea who SJ was before this past summer class, she somehow recognized me as I approached her, even as a student from her future class, and said that I "look much better without the robot head", or something like that. Apparently she was headed to a theater class, and she invited me to come see a "play on words" (I didn't catch that until I woke up and was writing it down ) that they were going to be performing. Still consequence-free, I leapt up on to her back and latched on tight, and she carried me to the class. When we got there I playfully told her that I wasn't going to let go, and she said "You have to!" (or something like that) and I say "Nope, I'll come off easily, but I'm not letting go." She barely brushes me back, and I make a joking breathy "oooooh" sound as I slowly fall off her back and into a nearby chair. She gives me an amused smile and goes to get ready to perform. >w< I just waited their for her class to start from that point on, but soon the dream ended and I woke up.

Yesterday

Dream Fragment - This one was technically more than a fragment as it was fully developed, I just don't really remember much about it now, so I can't fill in the details for my notes. "I go to a book/department store-based event, like A-Kon or something, with old [my senior high school] people at it. Walking around, not giving a fuck what people think. Yeah, look at the food."

Childhood Memories? [DILD]

I was driving my old jeep and my old friend JRE and I parked it somewhere deep in a forest. After we got out, we walked to where there was some bus stop and got on the bus, which then took us to some downtown area. Though I'm pretty sure I experienced all or most of our downtown adventure, I know there were tons of people that I potentially know. All I really remember of it now was wandering around a parking lot with JRE, and he was getting annoyed at me for acting childish (in a playful way), or something like that. Eventually we end up getting back on the bus, and initially JRE sits far away from me but he eventually moves up to where I am. The bus is traveling through the forest, and somehow it turns into the legs of an AT-ST (the two-legged robot walkers from Star Wars) with a tiny couch seat on top, where JRE and I are sitting. Of course, this all seems perfectly normal at the time. I was just admiring how vivid all of the forest surroundings were, and I had the sudden sense that JRE and I might be having a shared dream. Oh snap, this is a dream! I looked over at JRE and started doubting whether or not this was really shared, and I decided to slap him on the back to see just how stable he was. As I did he exploded into sand, and my hand continued to move straight through where he had been sitting. As the AT-ST legs took me back to where the Jeep was, I had the strangest sense that this dream was connecting me to my childhood memories, though it's hard to explain the sensation now. As I was approaching the Jeep, I looked down and noticed that I was wearing what appeared to be a transparent white one-piece bathing suit. It did make me happy, though. I got in the car and grabbed the wheel, which was now invisible, as the dream was sort of falling apart around me. I either drove or just phased forward through some kind of "wall" which I can't even describe that was in front of me now, and then everything went black, and soon I woke up.

Today

#1 - The Perfect Lawn [Non-Lucid]

There was a family party going on at my house and my aunt C and cousin S were there at least (and I think probably my uncle N as well), and all I remember is that I was relaxing in my bedroom and I knew that they were spending a lot of time in my parents' bedroom for some reason, and then they walked out and went into the guest bathroom, where my other aunt D suddenly walked down the hall trying to get to and was mad that it was already occupied. I think my mom was with her, too. Somewhere down the line (I think the dream may have skipped forward a bit), I decided to go swimming out back. I also became Jackie (Mila Kunis) from That '70s Show. Donna (Laura Prepon) was also there and I was trying to get her to swim with me, but she didn't want to get in the pool. :T I believe it skipped forward again and we were walking down the street that extends directly outward from my house (we're centered at a three-way intersection), and I was looking around for lawns that had sprinklers covering them with water (sometimes even sprinklers shooting water on to them from the middle of the street ). My aim was to find a yard that was so wet... that the grass and dirt had entered a complete liquidy consistency, so I'd be able to swim in it. ._. I even found one that I thought might be good, and I dipped my toes in it and saw it ripple. I turned around and said something to Donna I believe, but then I woke up.

Dream Fragment - I was hanging out with N and I think R on my back porch, and suddenly we were in the pool and N was talking about how he found some amazing ecstasy tabs recently, claiming he'd taken only a third of one and ended up rolling really hard. I ended these notes with "Me disappoint." Not entirely sure what that's supposed to mean here. >_>

Dream Fragment - I was with NS, this guy I knew through my entire public schooling career but then never saw again after we graduated, and we were walking around at some kind of Star Wars convention... or something....

#2 - An Old Goal Completed By Chance [MILD]

I was lying on my bed with my old friend D, and for some reason we were lying extremely close to each other, with our faces almost touching (but it wasn't supposed to mean anything, it was just taken as totally normal at the time ). Though I'm not sure if there even was much dream content before this, I had an underlying knowledge that we were in a Heroes-like world. Derek had the power of cryokinesis (ice generation/freezing) and I had the totally broken ability of absorbing the powers of anyone around me. Since we just happened to be right there next to each other, I grabbed his cryokinesis for myself. I suddenly had the knowledge of how to use it and everything. The dream skipped forward to he and I standing at an intersection, like actually in the lanes where the cars would be, waiting for the lights to turn so we could keep walking. I was in the left-hand turning lane, and D was arguing with me about something, though I can't remember what it was now. I was getting fed up with him, and when the light turned I flew off into the air and turned left down the road. Realizing that I was flying was enough to make me become lucid, and I knew immediately what I had to do. I thrust my arm out at a nearby plant while flying by and made the same kind of psychic-power-hand-gesture pose I make while using telekinesis, and the plant instantly froze over. It works!!!! Now I'll know how to do this from now on! I decided to freeze a car too, and it worked, but then it almost immediately just turned into a different white car and kept trying to drive slowly. Clearly the skill needs some work, but it's good to know that I can at least use it now. I wanted to try to freeze a human, so I looked for a DC and noticed a girl walking on the sidewalk not too far ahead of me. I pounced on her, expecting it to be playful... but apparently I put a bit more force into it than I meant to, because it killed her. O_O I was disappointed for a second, but then thought I'd give something else a try... and with one more psychic hand gesture, she came back to life! That's two new abilities! I ended up rolling around on the ground with her trying to get her into focus because my vision was fading away and I was having a tough time saving it, and finally I was able to freeze her, but I only heard it because my vision had already faded to black. Oh well, there's always next time! Shortly afterward, I woke up.

Dream Fragment - I was with D again and we had ordered pizza at his house (which wasn't really his house), but we were having them deliver it to my house so that we could drive over there to get it. We got here and ended up working on some homework on my dad's computer for some reason, but the pizza never arrived. I kept staring out the window for it, but only some girls I vaguely knew in middle and high school drove up but never got out of their car. I wanted that pizza. :C

Dream Fragment - My mom was asking me if the ball at the end of my poi was actually just a gigantic Skittle.

Supplement Dose: 1 cup Peppermint Tea

#1 - PSO2 Just Got Even Better [Non-Lucid]

All I remember about the first part of the dream was JRE asking me if I was checking him out, because he said that he could tell when people had "the eyes", or something like that. I wasn't checking him out, though. My memory skips forward a bit, and now I'm hanging out with JB. We're talking about Phantasy Star Online 2 (though it's not even remotely correct in its design) and playing what I believe is a demo. It has all the same menu structures as the original Phantasy Star Online, and I ask JB if he transferred over his character from Phantasy Star Universe. (Which isn't how it works. ) I was looking through my character's inventory during this and noticing that I had tons of really badass weapons, especially swords, and one of them was called Snake Beater, which I thought was pretty cool at the time. (A Phantom Brave reference.) We're apparently playing the game in some kind of warehouse, and the cool part is, whenever I was looking at these weapons they would actually spawn right next to us. They looked soooo cool, lots of them were dark neon colors or had black shadowy auras, and stuff like that.... So awesome. >w< JB takes all of this in, then turns to me and asks if I've been laid yet. Fuck you, JB. Then I woke up.

Soon after I rolled over to get to sleep again, I heard a somewhat loud banging noise. I actually used to get these a lot, whenever I would be entering sleep paralysis, but they haven't happened in a long time and it startled me awake. I was also getting very vivid hypnagogic stuff. Very mentholy.

Dream Fragment - Someone else and I were out back at my pool, and as we drew in the water with our hands, waves of glowing rainbow patterns would burst out from where we touched and hold their form for a minute. Whoever I was with (I think it was a guy, but that's about all I can remember) drew a heart shape in water, and I watched it as the patterns formed together. It looked so romantic.

#2 - Taking Off My Robe [DILD]

I think there was something going on this dream before I became lucid, but I don't remember much of it. I was housesitting for someone, and I decided to go out front. It seemed to be about the middle of the day, and while looking down the neighborhood road I became lucid. Three for three! My senses were pretty clear and vivid too, so that's cool. Somehow I got worked into trying to fly in third-person, and it was kind of working (and I remember watching a car drive down the road from a perspective slightly off the ground as I was doing it), but it was also making the dream rather unstable, so I stopped. At this point the dream shifted to nighttime, but I was still in front of the house. The shift was somewhat disorienting, and so, though I didn't really fully lose lucidity, for a minute I was just kind of going along with what was happening. I sat down on the curb next to the driveway (which was in front of the house), and it suddenly occurred to me that I was wearing nothing except a bra, panties, and a pink robe to cover myself with. Hmm, good to know. I actually felt pretty attractive in it. At around that time, a couple walked up and started pacing around the driveway. It was dark and I wasn't really looking directly at them for most of it, but I want to say that they were Hispanic. I had an instant attraction to the girlfriend, and I wanted to go up and tell her to ditch her boyfriend but it didn't feel like the right time. I just kind of listened to what they were talking about for a minute or two (though I don't really remember what it was now), and then they went into the house. They had been acting like they knew the owners or something, and could go in freely. Once they went through the door, now regaining full lucidity, I got up and followed closely behind them, deciding it was time to make my move. I could see them sitting on the couch through a window, and they turned to look at the door as I opened it. As I walked through it, I stripped off my robe to reveal my sexy lingerie and got blasted with a wave of libido. I felt curvier and like I was radiating beauty, like I was some kind of supermodel. I went and sat down in front of the girl, who was now white with blonde hair and wearing a blue bikini top and cut off jeans, I believe (though I barely noticed the switch at the time). I reached one of my arms around her and started running my hands over her skin, massaging her breasts, and basically just stroking her all over. She felt unbelievably soft, it was great. I could tell that she was enjoying it, and I grabbed her and went in for a kiss. All of the sensations were extremely vivid, including that last bit, but then the dream started collapsing around me, and I woke up, still extremely horny.

Oh menthol, what am I going to do with you?

Supplement Dose: 18.2 mg Menthol (Cough Drops)

Weed was smoked and half a beer was consumed a while before going to bed. This probably had a slightly detrimental effect on my recall, but overall didn't seem to influence my dreams.

#1 - Memory Skips [Non-Lucid]

The beginning of this dream is harder to recall as I believe it happened in third-person, but there was a group of people searching for something.... A time machine? Special documents? It's hard to remember now, but something important along those lines. This group of people was the bad guys, but a couple good guys had infiltrated their ranks and was planning to sabotage them. My memory skips forward a little bit, and I remember lying naked in bed with a friend of mine. o_o I want to say it was... well, that's not important. >w< But we were just cuddling and I was getting lost in fantasy. My memory jumps forward again a little bit and now I'm walking around a store with my dad, and he's talking to someone about how he always eats all the Ritz crackers and cookies at our house and I get mad that there aren't any left, which isn't even remotely true.

I woke up after that. The naked cuddling thing was definitely interesting... my libido was running strong in this dream, which it almost never does (unless I'm lucid). Was the menthol to blame? Hmm....

#2 - Fake-Out [Non-Lucid]

For this one I was actually just lying in bed for a while, and noticing that my visualization skills were REALLY strong. Everything in the previous dream had been incredibly vivid, and these mental images were no different. I was hoping it would go somewhere, but it didn't seem to be... so I sat up in bed, not realizing that it was suddenly a different bed, and opened my laptop, not realizing that I didn't have my laptop with me. I started typing stuff about the dream I'd had in, and slowly the screen started getting further and further away... until it faded out, and I woke up again. Damn! :O

#3 - Controlling The Professor [WILD]

Now I was just lying in bed again, still exploring the visualization. But I was also really tired still... my consciousness was drifting, but not fully fading away. Suddenly it occurred to me that there was some strange wall of bars and electricity and words that were impossible to read in front of me, it was all very confusing. Finally I decided to look away from it, and noticed that I had fully entered a dream. My second ever WILD! If that's not a testament to menthol's potential, then I don't know what is. There was a TV in front of the bed I was in that showed what looked like a Futurama video game, with the professor riding a motorcycle. Everything was extremely vivid and not unstable at all. I focused myself intently on the game trying to let it consume the whole dream, but it never happened. However, I was able to feel everything on the screen as if it was happening to me. I felt the motorcycle engine beneath me and all that stuff. I had the professor drive up all these crazy wall angles and up on to a person's back, that was fun. But then he accidentally drove off of a pier he was on and into the water, abandoning his motorcycle and swimming into a vortex of psychedelic-like mermaid faces as he did so. My libido was starting to shoot up and becoming really intense, and then the vortex consumed my entire perception, and I woke up.

Before falling asleep last night I decided to smoke some medium-grade weed to see if it helped with meditation more than the high-grade weed I've been smoking. The reason for this is because all of the high-grades around here are body highs, which means they have a good THC/CBD ratio rather than the mostly-THC head highs of the medium-grades. Since THC works through CB1 receptors which colocalize with and also indirectly stimulate D2 receptors, I figured this would be a much better bet for achieving a dream state; THC-dominant strains also make me hornier and trip harder in a psychosis kind of way, all evident of dopaminergic effects. The CBD strains have anti-THC action and then add their own serotonergic effects, which is wonderful for getting high and probably even for meditating in a non-dream-related way, but that's not what I'm looking for here. The outcome was pretty successful, I didn't achieve a WILD or OBE or anything because I'm inexperienced and it was right before going to bed originally, but the vibrations did get very strong, I felt warm and tingly all over and I had basically melted into the flat surface of my bed. I also used a light machine the first 10 minutes of it, and that created some pretty intense patterns that were pushing the high into complex visuals like cascading faces. After I finally pulled myself out of that, I fell asleep.

Dream Fragment - "Flying in a jungle with N, commemorative dollar coins with jokes written on them, school/mall food court, Facebook, talking about shared dreaming?"

Lucid Fragment IV [DILD]

I remember becoming lucid based on the fact that something I said didn't make much sense, but I don't really remember what it was now. This wasn't an "oh no, another lucid lost to a fragment!" dream, I was just really tired when I woke up and I didn't think it was interesting enough to merit taking the effort to write it down. Yeah, I was feeling lazy.

Jello Cubes And Drugs [Non-Lucid]

In an auditorium, I was in a new class with lots of confusing things going on, and my mom was sitting next to me in some kind of stadium seating. She had stopped talking after some red jello energy cube showed up next to us. I was pretty high and I started playing with it, unsure of what exactly it was. I was also talking to some really drug-dealer-stoner-looking guy about a new powerful drug I was planning to synthesize, and my description was complete with cartoony breakthrough visuals with bugs and galaxies and veins and blood vessels and etc., and I was saying it could basically either make you trip balls or it could kill you, we just don't know yet. The visual was pretty intense! That part of the conversation happened as we were walking through a hallway somewhere after leaving the auditorium, but I can't remember much after that now.

First Experiment [Sleep Paralysis]

After I woke up I got on DV and checked new threads for probably not longer than five or ten minutes. Upon checking the Post pictures of sexy hawt females thread, it occurred to me that I still hadn't officially reset my counter to zero for the one month of no masturbation challenge, and I was finally in the mood to do so. So that was fun.... Afterwards I thought about how long it had been since I originally woke up, and decided what better than now for a WBTB experiment? I got out my bong and smoked some more of my medium-grade weed, then positioned myself lying on my back in the bed, facing up.

At first I just felt extremely relaxed and zoned out. Then I started getting some mild hypnagogia coupled with delirium, i.e. thinking it was actually happening, but only a little bit. The first thing I remember is repeatedly thinking that I was walking into my bathroom and looking into the mirror, but still being faintly aware that I was really still in bed. There was more than that, but it's hard to remember now. After a while I got lazy and intended on giving up, so I flipped over to my side.

Suddenly, there was a large number of things going on in the room. First, the TV was on, I couldn't see it but I could hear it quite clearly. I don't remember what was being said. Second, my cat was meowing loudly in my room, and I couldn't see him either. Third, my mom was telling me something about my cat which I don't remember now. Same story, heard but not seen. And fourth, I was on DV talking to StaySharp about everything that was happening. Throughout all of this I was aware that this wasn't actually happening, except for the thing about DV. I was able to completely open my eyes and think at least somewhat lucidly. "Okay... I can't move.... So I'm in sleep paralysis? Alright then." With eyes open everything was dreamy and extremely distant, as if it was being perceived but not really processed. I looked at my laptop (which wasn't even actually there) and saw it start floating around the room, shrinking and growing in only one direction as it did so. There was a mild sense of "That's not right....", and then I closed my eyes again. I was back in my bathroom, looking in the mirror. This image wasn't completely solid, it was like 90-95% there, basically enough for it to be a fully structured dream sequence but with me still maintaining bodily awareness. I had a baby carrier positioned on me so that the baby would be in front of me, covering my chest and stomach, but there was no baby in it. Instead, there were two long, feminine, and beautiful legs protruding downward from somewhere in it that's hard to recollect now. I could also hear the voice of my cousin K talking about how I was going to turn into her or something, but I think it might have been more of my train of thought than something that was actually happening. This weirded me out a bit and, without fully comprehending the situation, I decided that I'd had enough of this. I opened my eyes again and just stared at the wall with the intention of ending the whole experience, and before long the dreamy feeling faded away, and I could move again.

I'll certainly be using this weed for more experiments in the future!

Quite An Experience [Non-Lucid]

A lot of this dream is hazy and hard to remember, but there was a good amount of detail to it. I was in some kind of casino/theme park and I was apparently in some sort of gambling debt to a group of Japanese businessmen. A bar waitress or something comes up to me and she's asking for the money, claiming that I can give her either 5000 yen or $5. I was looking through all my cash and all I had was a bunch of bills to represent my yen which are probably not even remotely right, though none of them had any numbers on them, and a $10 bill. First I asked the waitress to help me with my yen but she wouldn't cooperate, then I asked her if she could take the $10 and give me change and she refused, she said it had to be $5. Eventually the businessmen were angry and got some thugs to take me hostage and brought me into some kind of strange storage room where I was tied to a chair and placed in front of a panel of the businessmen with guns. There was some other guy on the floor to the right of me, in the fetal position. They said they'd been torturing him because he owed them money, and that his last name was Eriksen. I took that to mean he was an imaginary relative of Marshall from How I Met Your Mother. There was also a cat lying on the ground to the left of me up by the businessman. One of the men closer to the left suddenly gets up and scream something about how he hates torture... or loves torture... or something... but it was a really passionate declaration, and then he SHOT THE CAT. I try to get up but remember I can't, and I start saying "Look, I have a $10 bill!! Can't you just take it and get your $5 out of it!?" and they were like "Oh, you do? Okay then!" Suddenly the scene had changed to being at a movie theater, and we all started complaining about the fact that this wasn't the movie we payed to see. I can't remember what the movie was about anymore, but I sat down at a table and noticed that Kesha was sitting across from me. She looked severely drugged up, she was constantly swaying and her eyes were barely open, and she had a smile on her face like she was high and drunk beyond reason. She started asking me for advice about how to move beyond some fight she had with her friends where neither side wanted to back down, and I was telling her how she should stop dwelling on the past and just live in the now and apologize. She seemed happy, then someone distracted me. I can't remember what they said but I do recall knowing that we were suddenly watching the correct movie now. Someone gave me a contract to sign to verify this and I did, and on the screen I saw Smash Mouth and there was some cool music playing, but not by Smash Mouth lol. I turned around and faced the theater seats and Ghandi was sitting there on the end. I smiled at him and said "That was quite an experience!" and he got up and said "I know right!!", and walked off. After that I woke up.