task of the year

I float up out of my car. I look at myself. Why am I sleeping in my car? Fuck it. I have shit to do. Meet Raven on the Moon... and what...? Indiana Jones?... shit...

An army of Templars float down on winged beasts. I ignore them, and create a portal. My fly pods open, and swarms of flies attack their eyeballs, munching on them.

I open a portal to the Moon, and fly through. The Templars follow me through the wormhole. The Wormhole Wyrm battles them. I turn and shoot bolts of red energy at them. I fly out the portal landing on the Moon.

Moon dust kicks up. Raven is standing above me. She helps me up. “I thought we terraformed the Moon.”

“We did, Nomad. This grey moon is the illusion. We put this here to protect The Green Moon. Don’t you remember?”

“No. Yes. What are we supposed to do?”

“Open the Ark of the Covenant.”

“Right. Shit. The FUCKING TEMPLARS FOLLOWED ME.”

Raven and I are just outside the Biodome, which zap-teleports them away from us as they come through the portal. Raven rolls her eyes at the Templars, and makes a portal. We step through.

We are in a large cold cave. It reminds me of the ice cave I would play in with Selene and MoSh in dreams when we were children. I shiver. Raven laughs at me, and tells me it’s a dream.

“I don’t give a shit, it’s cold.” I summon up a big furry jacket.

“Nomad, are you lucid?”

“No. Look up ahead!”

Raven puts her hands on her hips. “Nomad, look at your nose, pinch your hands or something!”

I look past Raven into a large cavern. There are bunch of Nazis and Templars standing in a circular formation around a large golden box. Indiana Jones and the chick in the movie are tied to a stake. The creepy dude is about to open the ark. I put on my cowboy hat, and bust out my chain whip. “Nomad, that’s a lame copy of Indiana Jones.”

I sing the theme song in her face, and gently push her aside. I shoot my whip around a stalactite, and yank on it. I grab Raven around the waist to swing her with me to the ark, and she pushes my arm off, annoyed. “Nomad, I can fly, thank you very much!”

“Wait! Look! The Ark!”

I swing out over the people, and the creepy guy reaches for the ark. “Screw this!” I teleport in front of him, and push him aside. I reach for the ark.

“Nomad! Wait. We have to do it together.”

“Oh, right.” Raven teleports next to me. The ark hums and glows. I feel excited, but a little afraid... especially when golden snake carvings slither up the ark, then the two of them stare at me, one with ruby eyes, the other with emeralds. “We are DNA! We are the caduceus! We are the Tree of Life! And now, you will die!”

The snakes strike at me, and I slow time. Raven and I cut their heads off. They die and become flesh. I grab one and bite it. Raven asks me why I did that. “For its power.”

“What does it taste like?”

“Gross raw fish or raw chicken? Yuck.”

“Ok, weirdo. Let’s open this!”

Raven and I grab the lid together, and open the ark. A scream of a thousand souls vibrates my skull, and pierces my brain. The shrieking vibrates the cave itself. Spirits pour out of the ark, flying madly about. The Templars and Nazis melt. Raven and I begin absorbing the souls.

Diverge #1
We become two great bulbous chimeras... strange slimy wraiths.

We are on the Moon somehow.

We laugh and explode. Dark energy goes everywhere like black oil. It’s gross. We go back to original forms, and burn up the dark energy ectoplasm with violet flame.

Diverge #2
“Nate?” Angel is standing at the entrance to the cave. Raven nods to her, smiling madly as she fills up with the ghosts. “OMIGOD NATE WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”

“I am absorbing these ghosts. It’s okay.”

Angel roars at me, and morphs into Angelwitch. She flies into the sky outside the entrance to the cavern, and summons lightning into her staff. She channels it to us, and puts the ghosts into the ground.

***
Gifts of the Shark


I am in the Biodome by the koi pond with Raven. She is staring at the fish. She looks sad. “Raven, you okay?”

“Sorry I didn’t help you in that last dream when you were being attacked.”
“Huh?”

“By that shark guy.”

“He’s my friend. Wait. what are we talking about?”

“In that weird nightclub you like to go to with MoSh. That fucking shark bit you in half. I knew you wouldn’t remember.”

“I am confused.”

“It’s okay, it was just a dream. Anyway,” she says, smiling brightly, “he gave you this, because you ate him in the next dream.” It’s a strange device that looks like red steel swim shorts with a rocket that straps to your back. I put it on and zoom around, swimming in flight.

I land next to Raven.

“He said it’s supposed to help you swim faster, in waking life.”

“Are you serious?”

“I am. I don’t know if he is.”

“Also, this.”

Raven gives me a pendant carved from a huge shark tooth. On it is a carving of a vampire dolphin holding a knife and fork. I put it on. A strange pale shield forms around me, and I smell something like the ocean.

“This is to protect you from sharks, in waking life.”

“Okay....”

“And, this...”

Raven hands me a tiny greenish yellow gem in the shape of a rhombus. “And this...”
It floats up out of her hand, and it sticks to my forehead. My perception is altered. She sounds far away. “...will help you communicate with sharks, and all animals in dream and waking life.”

I close my eyes, and stare up and cross-eyed into my third eye. I stare at the world through the crystal. I see the Selenite.

“Nomad? Nomad? You okay?”

MoSh comes out of a portal, and lands in front of me. He looks like.... a green crystal?

Everything is so bright and sparkly. I acutely sense the aliveness of everything. I open my eyes.
“Whoah!” MoSh stumbles backwards. “You look like some crazy Hindu god, Nomad!”

“Huh?” For some reason I feel extremely tired, and I fall asleep.