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    1. She Takes my Bottled Water

      by , 05-24-2017 at 11:24 AM
      Morning of May 24, 2017. Wednesday.

      Dream #: 18,419-01. Reading time: 1 min 19 sec. Readability score: 64.



      I am in an unknown room (although there is an association, conscious afterthought only, that I am in the west area of the kitchen of our present home).

      There is an indistinct awareness; a possible backstory; of watching what may be a YouTube video made by people with a typical lack of reasonable intelligence. I am only aware of it at times. Its overall content remains uncertain.

      I am holding commercially bottled water. It is a 1.5-liter plastic bottle with a discernible label. It is probably about three-quarters full.

      An unknown dark-haired girl approaches me from the east side of the kitchen, possibly from my sons’ room.

      She wants to know what I have and what the name of it is. I see that the name of the bottled water product is “Watership Down.” I tell her this as I show it to her. I hand it to her, and she takes it, seeming formally appreciative as she walks away, possibly back to my sons’ room. My dream self remains passive and servile.



      My dream segment stems from the concept of dream state water induction and reinduction, where water usually vivifies the dream state (including by being splashed by it), based on the Naiad process, sometimes ritualistically, at the beginning of many sleep cycles. (The video association was probably from audio from a television that was on in reality.) Here, it is analogous to natural melatonin. I do not need more, as I do not need to remain in the sleep cycle. Thus, the preconscious avatar, no longer in service as a Naiad, takes my water away.

      What reveals that this (in addition to what I already know) is the case? First of all, rabbits often live underground, an association with being asleep, and the subconscious self (”below,” “under,” “underground”) not being the conscious self. Additionally, the lyrics from “Watership Down” begin with “Is it a kind of a dream?” (Zsuzsanna sang this to me on a cassette she made before we met.)


    2. Abraham Lincoln’s Teddy Bear

      by , 04-28-2017 at 10:28 AM
      Night of April 28, 2017. Friday.



      I am in a distorted liminal state of semi-lucidity, yet it is not active enough to have viable memory, including historical knowledge, though I am mostly aware of my present life status and conscious self identity. There is a couch in a fictionally-placed location that faces the foot of our bed (west), though this is more like typical bilocation as it seems to be a different house partially integrated into ours (and with the common dream perception of being in two places at once).

      Abraham Lincoln is sleeping on the couch in the semidarkness a few hours before dawn, his head to the north. He is dressed in a suit and mostly on his back but partly on his right side. I find myself picking up a teddy bear and feel that I should give it to him, but I do not want to wake him. I seem to recall that he always sleeps with a teddy bear (though this is fallacy as teddy bears did not exist in Lincoln’s time). He remains sleeping. I have no awareness that he had been a president or that he is deceased though I also do not see him as an imposer.



      Of the fifty solid years I have closely studied dreams, Abraham Lincoln has only directly appeared in a few of them, always as the (potential) emergent consciousness precursor symbol but never as the actual emergent consciousness factor. This may be because I (subliminally) do not believe my conscious self identity could “fill his shoes” so to speak.

      In one of my last Lincoln dreams in 2014, the personified preconscious, as a young female, kept saying “Lincoln lied about that”, lastly saying “Lincoln smiled…” and again followed by “Lincoln lied about that” (which may or may not be a dream sign as a play on lying down).

      Basically, this is a second-level “threshold” type due to the fact that the “doorway” was not literal but still directly implied as being between where my wife Zsuzsanna and I were sleeping (in reality) and the other room (our kitchen in real life but somewhat featureless and undefined in my dream). It is possible that the emergent consciousness precursor did not activate simply because I was near the beginning of the sleep cycle rather than coming out of it.


    3. Water Birds

      by , 04-26-2017 at 10:26 AM
      Morning of April 26, 2017. Wednesday.



      There were previous scenes at a different level of consciousness, but I more vividly find myself walking in an unfamiliar area. It seems as if it might be some sort of low-set bridge. I am not focused on where I am going. It may be to the shopping mall. There are no buildings around. There is a large expanse of water to my left. It is daylight out though I am not sure of the implied time. It may be morning.

      Eventually, I notice one other person about half-a-block’s distance ahead of me. Getting closer, I see that it is my wife Zsuzsanna’s sister Judy. She seems wary at first, until she realizes who I am, but keeps walking.

      My attention falls on the water. There are a large number of birds that are mostly all the same, mostly a mix of dark gray, black, white, and blue. Some of them are on the surface of the water, somewhat duck-like (though I am not sure what kind of a bird they are). About an equal number of birds, I can see under the water, their heads upward just to the underside of the surface. This imagery continues as I walk at least the equivalent of two city blocks. I find it curious, even somewhat peculiar, but it is a beautiful scene. The birds under the water do not move that much but may be feeding on the same food source that the birds above the water are looking for or eating. Thus, there is a vague sense of ambiguity.



      This is a curious liminal space transition (especially as I seem to be walking on some sort of bridge) that mixes water induction (with subliminal awareness of being asleep) and the anticipatory (yet also subliminal) consciousness shift symbol (the birds). I find it interesting how nearly identical imagery seems to be rendered in each area of the water as I walk along.


      Tags: birds, bridge, water
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    4. The Same Marks

      by , 04-14-2017 at 10:14 AM
      Night of April 14, 2017. Friday.



      There is a quickly perceived backstory of two unknown men. There is an awareness of each man being dressed somewhat as Zorro (though this is not fully perceived as such in my dream). It does seem that a couple masks are quickly removed prior to the last part. One man is at a table in a restaurant, though in semidarkness. I do not seem directly involved.

      The two men look nothing alike. One is much slimmer and taller. The slimmer man enters the restaurant and stands near the table. As the slimmer man looks down with his face very close to the one sitting at the table, he exclaims, “What the h— is this?” with both puzzlement and mild anger. Both men have identical sets of symmetrical and parallel scratches on their face (as if the marks were made on purpose), some coming out diagonally (and upward) from near each eye, some mostly horizontal on the cheeks, some down around near their mouth. They look at each other curiously, each perhaps thinking one is impersonating the other. The marks mostly look like cat scratches, and about half are still red.



      This is some sort of odd coalescence factor, probably the preconscious and the emergent consciousness personified in an oddly projected or secondary way. (I did get the brief impression that I was looking at myself even though neither man looked anything like me.) (There is possibly influence from Balthazar in “The Scorpion King”, a 2002 movie, though the appearance is very different.)


      Tags: mask, scratches, zorro
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    5. A Corrupt Television Needs a Reboot

      by , 04-07-2017 at 10:07 AM
      Morning of April 7, 2017. Friday.



      My family and I as we are now are watching television. At one point, it seems we are watching the movie “Firestarter” (1984).

      Over time, it seems that there are some very strange changes in the movie as I remember it and I become more and more annoyed.

      In a scene where Andy is talking to his daughter Charlie, he is now wearing a fireproof suit (where in the original scene he was in his normal informal clothes). I talk about how they must have covered up the image of the actor with some sort of CGI. I find the change ridiculous. (His face cannot even be seen as it is covered with some sort of material.)

      Other scenes have been changed. At times, Lego people appear in some of the scenes instead of human actors. Another scene has a stuffed dog that moves about like a real one. The nature of the movie becomes more and more surreal. At one point, I am sitting on a bed, seemingly somehow inside the movie (but only for a short time) and a stuffed dog and a stuffed rabbit are present (the stuffed rabbit in the bed and the stuffed dog walking about near the bed).

      I eventually decide that the television has become corrupt and needs to be rebooted like a computer so that television shows and movie scenes will be as they should be. I am in front of the television. Our youngest son is also present. I mention how I have to reboot the television.

      I look on the bottom right of it but I am not sure what to do. On the bottom left, but mostly arranged vertically, is a set of about seven buttons. They are of different shapes, a couple horizontally rectangular and a couple vertically rectangular while others are square. I see that one of the buttons (the bottommost one) reads “SET”. I assume that this might mean “reset” so I press it and the television screen goes black and a sequence of dominoes (overhead view) appears on the screen. Our youngest son tells me that those buttons are only for the domino game.


      Tags: television
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    6. The Extraterrestrial Shape-Shifting Worm

      by , 03-22-2017 at 09:22 AM
      Morning of March 22, 2017. Wednesday.



      This is a very long and vivid dream with a lot of different events. The location is not known, but it is implied to take place in our home in most scenes and there are rooms from various houses we have lived.

      I become aware of what I first think is a snake that is hanging down from a hanging planter. Soon, it flawlessly transforms into a long leaf. I start talking to my family about what I had seen. I want to film it but for some reason the camera is not available, which annoys me. Over time, this creature changes into many other things, based on some sort of learning curve related to being in the same place more than once. I do not refer to it as “extraterrestrial” until the last segment, although I am not sure if it really is from another planet.

      I handle this creature, which in its original form, is some sort of worm. At times, it is more like a miniature egg though is very malleable; somewhat like clay, somewhat like a leech. I place it on notebook paper and it transforms into a pencil. (This same scene occurs at least three times, as I repeat my experiments to see what it does.)

      In some cases, it merely changes color when I place it on a surface, though its color always perfectly matches the surface color. It does not really seem to try to escape when I hold it.

      There is a scene where I drink a cup of water or other liquid at a table. My throat feels a bit strange, as if something is stuck in it, and I look down into the cup and see that the liquid is filled with tiny pale worms swimming about in the water, all upward and out from the center. A young black male tells me that what I am drinking came from McDonald’s. He tells me how he did not want to be a part of it, but that they put these creatures in some drinks and normal earthworms in others as some sort of test. The several worms I had swallowed become one large one after I remove them from my throat. I am not concerned in any way. It looks just like the original worm.

      I place it on a moped seat (which for some reason is indoors, the room seeming like my den on Stadcor Street, the moped facing the doorway though leaning against the wall). The worm oddly transforms into an unusual human-like girl (who remains sitting on the moped) but hairless and with bright pink skin and slight feline characteristics. The other male looks on and scowls. “Oh no, I’m having none of this,” he says.

      Most of the rest of my dream involves more experiments where it goes through a number of intriguing and even beautiful multicolored changes. I also place it on a pillow in one of the final scenes as a dream-sign-based waking precursor, with non-lucid dream control.



      This dream is all about transformation and adapting to the dream state as the worm does not change anything else; only itself, as an amazing analogy to one type of dream state alchemy, though the worm exhibited far more of a natural and automatic control than I ever had in non-lucid dreams (although I have transformed into different things in the past, including both animals and furniture as well as utilizing invisibility, phasing through walls and roofs of cars, and flying since early childhood). Of course, there is a big difference between adapting to a dream or dream environment and fully controlling a dream.


    7. Climbing a Vine

      by , 03-04-2017 at 09:04 AM
      Morning of March 4, 2017. Saturday.



      I am in a rainforest, probably the Daintree Rainforest. It seems to be very late at night or a few hours before dawn. I am a young girl. I have no discernible association with my conscious self identity (which is rare in my dreams, even though much of my memory is often missing otherwise). I am clearly aware of my smaller size orientation and have full body awareness. (The river nearby was the foundation of my most common dream state induction.)

      Eventually, after I walk into a clearing, an unknown man approaches and tells me to climb a particular vine and puts me up on it so I can hang on. The vividness (even the momentum of my movement) is accurate and I very clearly feel the physical effort I utilize to climb higher, even tiring for a short time now and then. I am not sure why I need to climb up but I obey the man, who soon runs off.

      I climb higher and higher. In the distance, after I am near the top, I notice the heads of two dinosaurs, probably each a tyrannosaurus. They do not see me but I am slightly wary. (My height from the ground probably places me only a short distance above their heads so I am thinking that they could still get to me if they choose.) I move behind a couple of thicker branches, one of which the vine had been attached to. The dinosaurs are about half a block away but they do not approach the area I am in by the time I wake.



      Climbing is analogous to trying to return to conscious self identity from within the dream state. The dinosaurs are the coalescence factor but I am not approached or swallowed.


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    8. The Airplane Conspiracy

      by , 01-16-2017 at 07:16 AM
      Morning of January 16, 2017. Monday.



      There is some sort of conspiracy related to a hospital serving as an “airport” for certain flights, this being unknown to the passengers. Apparently, they experiment on the passengers or harvest their organs.

      There is a scene where I seem to be on an airplane, though I also see an unrealistic degree of additional details outside the airplane. The airplane lands on a boulevard near the hospital (in an unknown location), seemingly without any traffic mishaps. It even taxis into a special hangar inside the hospital.

      I somehow phase through the airplane even though I am aware that everyone else on it has gone into some sort of suspended animation (obvious autosymbolism for being asleep and dreaming). I am in the hangar and see several other people who work at the hospital approaching the airplane. They seem happy that a lot of passengers are in it. They do not even notice me at first and by the time they do, I am almost out into the hall. They start to chase me but I close the door and lock it behind me, the act of which immediately makes my dream much more vivid. (This is called “doorway reinduction”, as doors are usually autosymbolic of the implied exit point of a dream, though I have used this knowledge all my life to sustain and reinduce my dream state awareness.) The lock is a rectangular part that extends only a short way out from the face of the doorknob (by almost its full diameter), which I rotate to the left as I close the door (dream state reinduction orientation as I sleep on my left side). They cannot continue to follow me.

      Later, I notice unfamiliar patients in beds in the halls. Some of them join me as I then decide to leave the hospital rather than create any confrontations. I see doctors talking in the hall. I see at least one police officer, but I am not sure if he is corrupt and working with the hospital. Rather than going down one hall where we could get caught, I take one on the left of two choices, where there are no people who would question us or follow us. It seems to be a very simple evasion. We all get to the end of the hall and are able to escape.



      This is a very basic “return flight” type dream with the same overall patterns as always; the subliminal anticipation of the waking shift (which sometimes includes a falling sensation and which creates precursors that include a number of different flight symbols, though which also include elevators and staircases), the liminal space of the hall, liminal awareness of being asleep (a bed as a dream state indicator), and a doorway at the end of the hall to exit my dream though after having sustained its length a little bit by locking the first door. There is no direct preconscious factor here though it is a rather sustained unusual dream just for being based on vestibular system correlation. The organ harvesting was related to a movie we saw recently (“Inhale” from 2010). Still, it seems to imply that the collective unconscious is “experimenting” on the collective conscious, the logic being that the sleeping passengers would represent conscious selves sleeping and the hospital staff being minds active within the dream state, though I suppose it could also just be a simple metaphor for lucidity and how I am often lucid in dreams while many others are not (though I myself am not viably lucid at any point in this dream other than having a degree of the typical liminal dream control, that is, control of the dream state without in-dream awareness that I am dreaming, though my second attempt to reinduce and sustain my dream instead results in slowly waking by way of doorway waking autosymbolism, which has happened in childhood even when choosing the left door).


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    9. Helicopter Not Landing Yet

      by , 12-25-2016 at 06:25 PM
      Morning of December 25, 2016. Sunday.



      I seem to be in a very large unfamiliar room with a high ceiling that seems to be in a large commercial building. However, it is meant to be the inside of a helicopter (though the fact it looks nothing like the inside of a helicopter in any way does not trigger any level of doubt or any type of realization). I am apparently flying in this “helicopter” as a passenger. There are two unfamiliar male pilots (in black pants and white shirts) who mostly remain seated on the opposite side of the room from me. They face toward a wall looking at a number of monitors. At times, they seem to be typing flight instructions on keyboards as they look at the monitors. There is also some communication now and then with air traffic controllers or at least some people on the ground.

      The “helicopter” is supposed to be landing somewhere soon, but it is not safe to land anywhere in the area due to a mist that remains at least six feet above the ground and is covering unseen large rocks everywhere in the landscape. Some parts of some rocks protrude upward from the mist. It seems to be part of a canyon or possibly a series of canyons, all with mist and rocks. This puzzles me somewhat but nothing about the situation seems wrong or threatening to me.

      One of the pilots, while standing near the desk-like extension from the wall, seems to relate to the other that he could land without hitting a rock though no attempts at landing occur, at least any of which I become directly aware. There is a sense of movement at one point where the room seems to slowly turn in a circle but there is no disorientation or perceived danger on my part. I seem to be lying on my left side at one point though not directly aware of being on a bed. I start to think about the “helicopter” landing on the flat ground between large jagged rocks. I do not feel concerned about anything. The pilots do not address me at any point.



      This dream’s autosymbolic meaning is based on the biological nature of the dream state itself and obviously has nothing to do with waking life, especially as the autosymbolism’s phrasing in hypnopompic disclosure is known. A helicopter (which has been a recurring emergent consciousness factor in my dreams since early childhood), as with vehicles in general, is an autosymbolic extension of my physical body in REM sleep, though with a more defined subliminal discernment of the vestibular system ambiguity that occurs naturally in unconsciousness, than with similar autosymbolic extensions such as a motorcycle. This dream’s autosymbolism was based on a typical unconscious phrasing, “Although I am now sleeping, I am becoming more aware of my real environment and of my physical body, which is operating smoothly”. The jagged rocks are autosymbolic of a vague anticipation of a waking start (hypnopompic kick or other involuntary muscle event), though of which does not occur, and the mist of course is autosymbolism for the dream state itself. This dream has a curious ambiguity of taking the subliminal awareness of being in our bedroom and sustaining it with the typical return flight waking symbolism, a type of RAS mediation which has occurred in at least one dream per regular sleeping period for over fifty years. As I am already in the more defined liminal space of conscious self recognition in passive waking transition, there is no dominant RAS modulation and the pilots of course are RAS personification and the emergence of thinking skills, which typically do not exist in the dream state.


    10. Return to an Unlikely Apartment Building

      by , 11-17-2016 at 05:17 PM
      Morning of November 17, 2016. Thursday.



      I am wandering around in La Crosse as I have the vague realization that I am tired and should probably go home. My dream self seems about twenty years of age. I fly to the back of a building, to the first-floor’s extended roof of the building which has at least two storeys. This feature provides access to two apartments on the higher floor. (The feature is similar to the Rose Street building I lived in as a young child, except it only had one hallway door to the first-floor roof. The location itself seems more like the area where Dennis lived years ago which also had only one door to the first floor roof.) From the outside, I have a false memory that my apartment is to the left and the one on the right is where my brother Dennis lives. He appears as he did in the 1970s.

      The setting is very distorted. Even though I remember living and sleeping in the apartment, it is far too small for a human being to either go through the doorway or actually live inside the building. The height of the living area is no more than two feet. This puzzles me but neither triggers any realization that the situation is impossible nor results in stronger emotions. I consider that the building is mostly made of a stack of bricks that shift a bit at times, which somehow makes the apartments smaller or larger at different times.

      There is a conversation between Dennis and our (fictitious) landlady, which eventually relates to something about feeding homeless people in the area. I cannot get into my apartment so I decide to sleep on the roof while thinking of how the homeless people will be fed as it seems like a worthwhile task. Dennis has some carrots, lettuce, and potatoes to start a stew or soup. Eventually, just as I begin to wake, there are vague thoughts about geese flying over the building and returning to the area.



      Wandering around feeling tired is a dream state indicator created by subliminal awareness of being asleep as well as having been tired in reality prior to my dream. This is additionally evidenced by wanting to sleep on the roof, which is a liminal space divider related to depth of sleep and how much of the conscious self identity is present. It is also why my dream’s setting is rendered as too small to access. The geese returning to the area is typical vestibular system correlation, autosymbolism for waking process thoughts in “returning” (waking back into) the physical body while leaving the illusory dream body. There are also mild thoughts of hunger. The “feeding” reference is to me, as “homeless” is based on liminal awareness of not being awake in the physical body.


      Updated 06-13-2018 at 07:59 PM by 1390

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    11. Chopping up the Preconscious

      by , 11-12-2016 at 05:12 PM
      Morning of November 12, 2016. Saturday.



      I find myself in what seems to be our old apartment on Gellibrand Street in Clayfield, yet which also has the feeling of the northeast bedroom of the Loomis Street house (yet another new composite I have never experienced before). The Loomis Street living room is mixed into the Gellibrand Street hall. However, even though it looks more like the Gellibrand Street apartment I feel younger and as if it is mainly the small Loomis Street bedroom.

      At one point, I hear an unknown male talking outside my door. Eventually, it seems he is mocking me, yet somehow without being directly sarcastic in his vocal tone. I am annoyed and go out to the front yard but do not yet see him. I notice that instead of the front steps there is a round boulder to have to walk up onto, which is difficult. The unknown male is now standing at the open hall entrance. He reminds me vaguely of Don K (who I had not seen since around 1982) and seems about twenty-five years old. He makes a couple comments about my difficulty in walking up and over the bolder and I feel a bit annoyed as my legs do not seem to work correctly.

      He mocks me with a few more comments, a couple relating to phrases my mother used to use (such as “my old bones” and “this nutty old world”). I agree with a couple comments he makes relating to my apparently lame legs.

      Still, I become more annoyed by his presence. He makes comments about details in my dream journals that I had written way back when I was only eight or nine years old (the original phrasing and writing style). I am surprised he knows all this. I get the impression he had somehow been reading my dream journals way back to 1966. I wonder if he stole any of them or any of the pages.

      Eventually, I punch him out. He ends up lying on his side in an unknown area, as the setting now transforms into an unfamiliar location. When he moves, I decide to chop him up so that he cannot be an annoyance anymore. Another male appears (likely the emergent consciousness personification as it seems more passive and “closer” than a personified basic conscious self identity) and we seem to be working in a mission together. There is an advanced computer that speaks as I am trying to work out where to send the body parts.

      I give the computer vocal instructions and it answers me in a loud clear voice. I give it various longitude and latitude directions though at first, what I say is distorted and meaningless. The computer keeps correcting what I say so I can repeat certain details.

      “Thirty-six degrees latitude north,” I eventually say. “One hundred fifteen degrees latitude west…”

      “You mean longitude,” says the computer loudly. I agree with all the corrections the computer makes, but I have no idea where I am sending the body parts as it feels I am just saying random values. I get the impression that a team will come in, take them away, and place them wherever.

      “The Deuce-Berry Hoover Dam,” announces the computer. I am somewhat surprised and am not certain it is a good idea to put the remains there (as I consider the remains sitting atop the wall near a spillway, right out in the open), but I do not say anything. The other male looks on passively as I visualize the espionage team getting ready.



      A dam is a potential waking prompt as water symbolizes sleep and a dam stops water from flowing; deuce is sometimes a term for the preconscious (secondary to a more defined emergent consciousness in the final scene of a dream), berry being a play on “bury” and “Hoover” also being associated with vacuum cleaners (both a mortality symbol and dreaming conduit and waking transition symbol that has been recurring more over the last ten years); the talking computer is the personified whole conscious self (not that common a feature as here) due to only the whole conscious self having viable thinking skills.



    12. A Secret Lost Park with Mechanical Animals

      by , 11-10-2016 at 05:10 PM
      Morning of November 10, 2016. Thursday.



      I am in a van being driven by my brother-in-law Bob. Most of my family members are with me in the back except for Lorenzo (middle son). Looking to my left, I see that an unfamiliar female passenger in another vehicle (probably a van as a car would be lower) somehow holds onto the top of the driver’s side window of Bob’s van, which I think is a very foolish thing to do. (This seems to be a preconscious factor, at least potentially, but the situation eventually fades.) The vehicle has four chubby and aggressive females, probably in their late thirties. My brother-in-law does not respond. I eventually yell at them. They soon drive on ahead.

      We eventually arrive at an unfamiliar shopping mall near a mountainous area. It now suddenly shifts to nighttime, around eight o'clock. I suddenly feel concerned that Lorenzo is not with us, as I feel he should not be left alone (at our house) for the two or so hours we will probably be here (seemingly for shopping and a movie). I decide to quickly fly back to make sure he is okay, though on one level, I feel silly about flying all the way back after just arriving here, as it apparently took a long time for Bob to drive out here. However, because a parking lot symbolizes liminal space (a higher state between dreaming and waking), I somehow get “stuck” right on the perimeter. I am flying but not making much forward progress (a very rare event for me, but I have rarely attempted flight over a parking lot in dreams). I almost manage to fly above the roof of a nearby house. Instead, I decide to teleport to my bed (false awakening) and I am glad I am now able to check on Lorenzo.

      Almost immediately, I am with Lorenzo and the rest of our family in the front yard in Cubitis. It now seems early afternoon. It seems there are several people trespassing, close to the bedroom windows. I get angry but my family and I end up leaving, walking southward (with no destination in mind). I shout several rude remarks back at them as well as making rude gestures. They do not seem intimidated. Curiously, they are mostly all seated on the ground in formal meditation positions, including an unknown toddler (male). I get the impression that the oldest male (about sixty), who is thin and wearing coveralls, had been working on a car, but I do not see a car anywhere.

      Soon, I am walking with Zsuzsanna and an unknown female with dark short hair. As we walk along, there is mention of the van event that occurred in the first part of my dream (as this female apparently had trouble with the four from the vehicle as well). I eventually enter a very subtle lucidity, but not active lucidity. This is where I am not lucid but manifest, mostly through pretense at first, the idea of a secret area to explore (commonly recurring since early childhood).

      Even though it is mostly an outside area, we come to floor-length curtains (subtle lucidity sign, akin to going onto a stage). Going through the beige curtains, we enter some sort of secret abandoned park with a zoo theme. I am at first somewhat startled by a male and female lion (just to my left and past a doorway we come out from), and I am concerned for a short time that they may jump over the fence. However I soon realize that they are animatronic animals that have not been maintained for a long time as some of the sections of fur are missing and metal and plastic can be seen through certain areas. We continue along a beautiful garden path. The sidewalk, always with a continuous hedge on each side, turns at ninety degree offsets fairly often, but is not really maze-like. Although I am aware of several other animatronic animals, I do not see them due to dense shrubbery. I feel very happy and relaxed.

      We somehow end up in a kitchen, which is a little like the one on Stadcor Street. I am, for a short time, aware of a group of people walking by outside the large windows, but I do not actually see them through the curtains. I only hear them and they seem cheerful. There are soon unusual implications in the immediate setting. I see the year 2002 on a small calendar magnet on the refrigerator as well as seeing it on a couple documents. Zsuzsanna and the other female do not seem to “realize” the implications. To me, based on seeing “2002”, it seems like we are in the present. I feel that there is a pretense that the park had been closed for many years even though the date (false assumption) reflects the present (and even though by dream implications we are fourteen years in the past). Still, I feel a sense of harmony and peace.



      Being in the kitchen in the last scene represents light hunger during sleep. A lion is often the coalescence factor (return to consciousness) as it can swallow the imaginary dream self (and is an association with “The Sleeping Gypsy” 1897 oil painting). The curtains were the same color as the lions, so this was a type of subliminal expectation, though the lions turned out to be mechanical (and not any sort of threat) in this case. My puzzling over the date and not knowing the present year is quite common in my dreams. The personified subconscious (dream self) has no concept or understanding of time in the majority of my non-lucid dreams. For example, I am often much younger or in a different or mixed up time period that combines different time periods. I do not like conflicts or conflict-related challenges in dreams, though the preconscious biologically needs to be aggressive to push the dreamer to activate waking (via RAS) even though coalescence consent (such as hugging a dream character as also has recurred since childhood) would be much better, though the personified subconscious (dream self) typically sees the preconscious state as a threat (especially when there is a subliminal desire to sleep longer), both with negative daybreak types (or end of the world events) and various forms that chase the dreamer, rather than allowing time to indulge in sustained dream exploration as here.


    13. Unconvincing Resurrection

      by , 10-18-2016 at 04:18 PM
      Morning of October 18, 2016. Tuesday.



      My wife Zsuzsanna and our children as we appear now are living in the Loomis Street house, though I have no memory of my relatives who actually lived there. We hear loud voices from upstairs a few times. It turns out to be at least two young males, possibly college students.

      I am outside near the (south) side of the house when I hear some yelling in the upstairs apartment but I do not see anyone. Just as I go back into the house via the front door, one of the unknown males is suddenly there yelling as if he thought I was spying on him just by me being outside. This is the personified preconscious but I am fully non-lucid and do not recognize the essence at this point.

      I soon go outside when he is no longer present. I am carrying my large barbell bar. I end up getting my second one because I soon see that the other two males have a couple near the back of the house, sticking out through the door of the laundry room (which is not logical as it is our living area not theirs) though they do not pick them up when they come into the backyard. I hold both my bars up as if for a sword fight. I decide to steal their two barbells, and, along with my two, put them in a (fictional) attic in the house where they cannot get to them. I tell them this directly. The attic is full of features that I falsely recall are mine, including bed frames (dream sign).

      We get into a fight and I knock one of them out; the one who had been yelling at our front door earlier (personified preconscious). While the other male stands on the back concrete step for the back door, I end up putting a dagger horizontally through his neck. Still, I feel a little bad about this because he is much younger than me.

      Still in the backyard, I place his body in a bucket that is full of water (which of course is very unrealistic as how could someone fit in a bucket). Somehow, the water does not spill out. I decide I will resurrect him.

      After I focus more, with the intent to bring the character back, I look down and notice a skull in the bucket (not logical as he was not in skeletal form when put in). Soon however, a long white balloon with a sketchy skeleton design on it slowly rises up from the water as if being pumped up with a bicycle pump. This seems a bit strange to me but does not puzzle me a lot or trigger any significant thoughts. I get the impression that the character goes back to normal in vague liminal space during the waking stage.



      Because this involves water induction and resurrection, I will assume that this character is my personified conscious self (as it had been determined long ago that the personified preconscious is sometimes a partner to the personified conscious self as a precursor to resolved emergent consciousness in a non-lucid dream, the dream self being the personified subconscious regardless of the “I am” identity - this being obvious because the personified subconscious or dream self cannot remember much at all, unless of course more threads of the conscious self are present). On one level, this could be subliminal reinduction (especially as water is involved); an attempt to “bring my dream back to life”.


    14. Hovering Around in Leonard’s Room on King Street

      by , 09-12-2016 at 03:12 PM
      Morning of September 12, 2016. Monday.



      The most obvious dream sign in a dream is being in a bed (which is not typically a “dream symbol” at all - it is usually just a subliminal memory of having gone to sleep, just as being undressed in public is) and such is the case here. However, it is not my real bed at some points even though the orientation falsely feels exactly the same. I find myself sleeping in Leonard’s bed in the King Street boarding house; a location I have not been to in over twenty years.

      Leonard’s room is arranged so that there are three beds; two to the east wall and one from the west wall somewhat in the middle on that side. Although Leonard (born August 1945) is only present briefly, there are also two malcontent disaffected college students sharing his room. They are probably only around twenty years of age. The bed I had been sleeping in is in the northeast area of his room (head to the east windows), where a bed had not only never been in reality, but had appeared as such in previous dreams, which causes me to yet again question why dreams “get everything wrong” so consistently like this in regards to layout, locations, and settings in general (even combining settings from two different countries), more especially as my dream self never takes notice of such an overt “mistake” that seems almost intentional as a type of tertiary dream sign which has been a facet of the majority of my dreams since earliest memory.

      I seem to be ostracized (by the two other males) for sleeping in Leonard’s bed due to the fact that I am not an actual tenant who pays rent at this boarding house at this time. I do not really care. Even though I am not lucid, I decide to get out of bed, allow myself to float up to the ceiling and hover there, facing downwards while very slowly turning about much like a large ceiling fan that is coming to a stop until my head faces east. The sensation and momentum feels perfect and very harmonious. Still, they do not seem amused, continuing to only glare up at me (which I find somewhat amusing), but they do not say much. I contemplate the idea of sleeping up here from now on while hovering downwards as such in the center of the room near the ceiling, slowly turning like a ceiling fan as if in an environment without gravity.



      Of the tens of thousands of dreams I have documented and closely studied (including with comparing and contrasting similar dreams), there seem to be three types of dream lucidity (not including scripted lucid dreams of which there is no point in posting online) that are nothing at all like typical lucid and semi-lucid dreams (which otherwise come into full control by spoken phrases, or including lately, the written word), and in fact, are so different from “ordinary” dreams as to be “something else”, especially apex lucidity, where full automatic control is manifest for as long as desired (or until the dream colorfully breaks up from needing to wake relative to the biological need to wake).

      Instinctual dreaming seems to be the most common type of dream for me since earliest memory (and is similar in clarity and mood to a typical non-lucid dream); that is, shaping at least part of my dream with background expectations (which is how some people create nightmares for themselves by focusing on and amplifying their own fearful expectations, without understanding that it is their conscious mind creating this, not the unconscious - which of course has no sentience or awareness) without at all having any level of actual lucidity or questioning my status or perspective in any way regardless of any wrongness or otherwise surreal nature of the setting or events. Two, pretense-based dreams, where whatever I say to another dream character or imply in a dream changes it perfectly based on my pretense even though there is no facet of lucidity at all. For example, I will say that I have valid identification to enter a secret military base (even though I “know” I do not) and it will simply manifest in my dream as such. Three, apex lucidity, something I cannot begin to understand due to its state being so utterly different than other dreams. Fully in-body, perfect clarity and sense of physical weight and momentum, solidity and incredibly realistic ambiance, and full ongoing “automatic” control based on any conscious desire (though conscious expectation is the dominating factor in most dreams anyway). The state is different from scripted lucid dreams (which often end after the last scripted event with the falling jolt waking mechanism as is to be expected) in that no practiced meditative sequence seems required and whole consciousness (though somehow shifted into liminal space) takes over completely (and the perception remaining at this level potentially indefinitely), with all the senses augmented.


      Updated 09-09-2019 at 07:36 AM by 1390

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    15. Mister Sandman and the Freakies

      by , 08-21-2016 at 02:06 PM
      Night of August 20, 2016. Saturday.



      I am in an unknown area, but which strongly seems to be the area near the fictional New Moon Drive In from a Huckleberry Hound story. I am not sure how this wonderful childhood impression so clearly comes to me after all these years, but it has happened a number of times previously. There is a very strong happiness permeating my dream for a time.

      Eventually, I am aware of the Freakies from Freakies Cereal, although there are additional creatures which appear quite different than the original characters. Each one is a different color (including purple, pink, and cyan) and about half my height. One is an octopus-like creature but his limbs are truncated to where they seem more like suction cups or extended “craters” all around his spherical body. Another creature is like an octopus as well but his thin tentacles have numerous additional thin tentacles coming out of them evenly all down the side, the effect somewhat like minimal plant roots. At one point we stand on the roof of an unknown building (possibly meant to be the Rose Street building) watching the sky for Mister Sandman.

      All this time, “Mister Sandman” (by the Chordettes) seems to be playing. However, the other words are not distinct and the song seems to actually be about the “real” Mister Sandman arriving, possibly by rocket.

      I wander about in what resembles a fairground setting and there is a nice sense of timelessness and “being in the right place”.

      Eventually, Huckleberry Hound is seen on the roof of the New Moon Drive In in his crashed rocket (though there had been no focus on any actual crash). He looks about as if puzzled. A number of people approach the building with low-level crowd noises and a positive sense of wonder. I cross a street to see what is going on.



      I thought this was a wonderful and nostalgic experience. I was semi-lucid throughout most of it though remained passive regardless of the presence of the weird ugly Freakies. I thought it included a very nice “failed flight waking transition” event, a very common waking metaphor (a far more detailed extension of the primary biological waking function). Although I have not included a “water induction” tag, there is an association as the song “Moon River” has the lyric with “my huckleberry friend“ (though obviously not connected to Huckleberry Hound).

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