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Morning of October 31, 2017. Tuesday. After stepping into my dream, I quickly begin to lose lucidity and memory (though several threads of conscious self identity remain extant). I find myself within a typical dream state induction stage; riding a bus, which is also sometimes a dream state end marker (or waking transition factor) though not in this case, and is unrelated to real life either symbolically or literally (and I have not ridden a bus in years). My wife Zsuzsanna is with me. We are apparently in La Crosse (though Zsuzsanna has never been to America). I am aware that Marilyn (older half-sister on my mother’s side who died in 2014) is living in the Loomis Street house. I “remember” her status as she appeared in the 1980s as if that was the present time. The bus driver turns down an alley, which is seemingly the Wood Street alley south from Gillette Street. Eventually, I notice it is nighttime even though it was daytime moments previously. I feel an unusual association of my physical body being linked to the movements of the bus. This is because I know and understand that for me, being on a bus is usually an expanded projection of the otherwise fictitious dream body, as well as a distorted subliminal association with my sleeping physical body. A bus is also a coalescence factor in unifying neural energies (in the guise of different dream characters) in real time within the dream state. I know this to be true as I have experienced and validated it thousands of times since early childhood. The bus goes through half-oval paths in and out of at least three people’s backyards. It is very narrow, but no mishaps occur. The half-oval paths are bordered by a stack of cardboard boxes (of a very similar appearance as in my dream of the 29th, “To the Zoo”, and is therefore a carryover caused by the virtuous circle effect of unconscious dynamics). These paths would not be possible to maneuver and turn in in reality, especially for a bus. I end up in an area near the Black River, on its east side. There is one unfamiliar cottage present. Two mailmen are walking north and side-by-side to the cottage, but only one is carrying a letter. I see a street sign that names the area as Delores Street, though it is actually not a real street, just a stretch of land near the Black River. I also see that the letter has Delores Street on it, yet I recognize the name above it as a former pen pal of over twenty years ago. (I do not recall the other name, but Delores was the name of an older lady in a wheelchair who I had written to for a time.) I am amazed that this pen pal is now living here. I “knowingly” tell Marilyn, who makes a brief appearance to my right, that, “it took them one and a half years to deliver that letter”. I am aware that it is a letter from me, which of course makes no sense at all. How could it be a letter from me when I did not know she had moved to La Crosse? I am also trying to determine what will happen if she knows I am living here. Many more nuances of this scenario make no sense at all in any context (though bear in mind that my dream self does not consider how wrong or mixed-up the entire scenario is). Eventually, while I am still a short distance south of the cottage, I see this dark-haired girl of about eighteen years old and wearing only a towel. She is cheerfully walking southerly, passing fairly close to me, yet without seeming to notice me at all. Apparently, she is going to where Marilyn lives. I supposedly live there as well. It is a fictional building south of the cottage (a new and unique location). This makes no sense either, yet I still see her as my formerly much older pen pal who is now somehow much younger. Another way that it makes no sense is that I am fully aware of the Loomis Street address and yet the location Marilyn and I live is a fictional area (even though I am also ambiguously aware that we “still” live on Loomis Street - yet not). Not only that, this girl somehow knows our “new” address. Non-lucid dreams indicate a major cessation of viable memory. From here, my dream distorts into unrelated events. I am in a large unfamiliar shed or warehouse. I notice a complex block and tackle device through a square opening in the ceiling, although there is an additional ceiling above that one. The device has a block with about eight or nine sheaves (rather than two for a twin sheave) with hard mud and straw between them. Over time, I vividly knock out the sections of dirt and debris with a long stick so that the wheels rotate fully around. There is no backstory to this, but I suspect it relates to teeth hygiene. This takes time and a number of attempts as I watch large sections of dirt and straw loosen and fall from the sheaves. An unknown female of about thirty years of age appears. We talk about the Internet. I have some older computer technology sitting on a table in the warehouse, which I might be getting rid of. She seems interested in it. I pick up an old modem and she mentions something about Wi-Fi as if she does not want anything to do with it and she asks me if I have it. I tell her that my oldest daughter and oldest son have it but that I use a cable (which amazingly is actually true even though I am in the non-lucid dream state - how strange is that). We go to what seems to be an area in a house (which is not logical as we just turned around and walked a short distance while in the warehouse or shed). I turn the computer on but then “remember” (incorrectly) that this CRT monitor does not come on fully as the top and bottom of the screen is distorted and the picture is horizontally squashed a little. I mention this to the female. She still seems interested in the modem. From here, I am distracted by two unknown males (though one of whom may be a younger version of our landlord). They are on an unlikely platform high up inside the warehouse. I tell them that I had cleaned the block and tackle and they seem appreciative but I am also apparently going to help them by lifting something up near one end of the warehouse. I notice very small square holes with a white membrane in the ceiling. I successfully and effortlessly lift up (with block and tackle) whatever it is I need to lift up, which I am uncertain of, but which may have been a part of the building to put back into place. There is an unusual scaffold-like area on that side as well (perpendicular to the unlikely narrow platform the men are on) and I do it from an otherwise very unlikely distance from the center of this large building.
Morning of October 25, 2017. Wednesday. There are two types of dream scenarios influenced by the “Supernatural” television series; ones in which I am “in” the show’s world (without realizing that it is fiction) and ones in which I am aware of the Winchesters as their real-life counterparts as actors and on the set of the show or another location. This dream is of the former type; I am “in” the world where “Supernatural” is imagined as “real”. Sam and Dean, and apparently their father, have discovered a portal to another world, though it is more like a pocket universe in the form of a large cave. They need to retrieve something deeper within the cave, such as important maps or other documents and possibly treasure. There are unusual features related to working near the opening of this cave. There is a small pond as well as some sort of dynamic staircase that rises from the pond and which changes in position and orientation (including upside-down). At one point, there are very loud footsteps and vibrations that imply a giant anthropomorphic creature approaching the mouth of the cave from inside; a giant manlike beast that wakes up when the portal is open, apparently preventing people from going farther into the cave, though I never see this giant. They close the portal for a time, though I decide to run off and hide in an orange grove. I think about which orange tree would be the most suitable to hide behind. At this point, it seems like the orange grove across the street from my Cubitis home (where I have not lived since 1978), which then implies that the portal was in about the center of the Cubitis living room, bilocated as such (environmental bilocation being a very common aspect of my dreams since childhood, yet of which I hardly ever see other people write about). Absentmindedly, I go back to the location where Sam and Dean are. They seem very cheerful. They have an unusual advantage now. There are two living idols that are on our side of the portal that are preventing two smaller living idols from going back into the entrance of the cave. The smaller ones are only about a foot high and the other two about two feet in height. They look somewhat like Maori idols. I watch the smaller two try to get back into the cave, but they eventually give up because of the larger two guarding it. They then go to a playground and have fun sliding down the slide, exclaiming “wee” and giggling. I watch the activity of these unusual living statues for a few minutes. Sam and Dean are now getting what they want from the cave. The giant will sleep when the two small idols are not present inside. He could not possibly wake up otherwise. From here, I absentmindedly wander off into a featureless field (a common liminal space setting in my dreams, especially in the last scene), which seems to be at night. A beautiful young girl approaches though I do not fully recognize her as a young version of Zsuzsanna (even though she is, though my conscious self identity is still subliminal and my non-lucid dream self amnesiac and of fictitious dynamics). We hug and kiss but she says something about needing to go somewhere. I assume I will see her again later as my dream fades. Since early childhood, other than literal prescience (including biological foreshadowing as well as premonitory factors of the waking jolt itself) and many other literal features, my dreams have easily been seen as mostly being about dreaming and waking in real time (and the symbolism as such, obviously as it is a mental process in real time) rather than the nebulous and ill-informed concept of “interpretation” that many people believe in for whatever reason. The same is true for this dream. The cave represents the status of being unconscious (including the redundant factor of a dream as if of “another world” that “hides” the conscious self identity) as well as deeper levels of memory (validated by the Cubitis setting, not seen in real life since 1978). The four idols represent dynamics of the reticular activating system, which mediates the level of consciousness (and is responsible for the nature of waking symbolism, sometimes utilizing real-life environmental ambiance or physical discomfort of sleeping position). The two smaller idols (emergent consciousness factors, unfeasibly otherwise modeled after the preconscious, representing the two brain hemispheres) need to be present to activate waking, yet the two larger idols (dream-based figures representing my subliminal desire to sleep longer) prevent them from causing the giant to wake. The two smaller idols still playfully simulate waking (to indicate that waking up is not so bad) by playfully going down the slide, which is akin to the common biological falling sensation of waking. After this, a young Zsuzsanna (mostly as she appeared when we first met in real life, though she is wearing slacks and a blouse) is rendered as the emergent consciousness factor to “try again”. This time, coalescence waking symbolism is the key and the feasible result, which symbolizes both my dream self’s coalescence back into my conscious self identity, my link to the familiar, and the dawning of conscious self identity recognition, which is not present in many dream states. “Beyond the Martian Time Barrier / The Martian Casket” from 1973 is a very good example of the same core symbolism. The status of sleeping and waking bilocated in the center of the Cubitis living room in mostly the same way, though in that dream, REM sleep was also symbolized as the “sleeping” Martian’s eyes being seen to move realized as being mine as reflected back. In that case, there was not an additional waking symbolism segment as here, as it was not needed.
Morning of September 25, 2017. Monday. In my dream, I find myself with a personified version of the preconscious that I created in the 1980s. Although this form is active every now and then, like most forms of the preconscious, there is typically no connection to waking life or the pretense of “interpretation”. This male in my dream as the role of the RAS (reticular activating system), which is what biologically controls the waking transition and its symbolism between consciousness and unconsciousness, is of the “Hierarchy”, a term I created in the 1980s for the nature of the dream state and its various core components and real-time symbolism including circadian rhythms symbolism. Its inherent waking symbolism is of a necessarily biological authority, unrelated to waking life. (Dream symbolism is more about the nature of being unconscious than being awake, kind of a no-brainer really, yet most of society presently completely ignores this truth.) Alex (Alexander; chosen because it means “defender of men” or “protector of mankind”, a good analogy for RAS) and I are in an unknown building. It may be a library, as shelves and dividing walls that do not reach the ceiling are present. There is an unfamiliar elderly woman present. Though I am never lucid (or even subliminally lucid), we are here to research the nature of the Hierarchy, and the woman mentions some sort of ancient document, which supposedly relates to this organization that secretly rules and protects mankind. At one point, Alex and the woman are on the other side of a shelf that is almost up to the ceiling. I can hear him confirm that the document is genuine. Wondering what my role in all this is, I decide to climb up to the top of the shelf. I look through a few boxes on the top shelf. I look down and see an unusual anthropomorphic crescent moon cookie cutter, though it is vertically oriented rather than of a logical cookie cutter design. It has the essence of an ancient artifact and I find it interesting. I ask Alex if I can have this and use it in my work. He informally tells me that there are “no cookie cutters” in the Hierarchy, more so referring to the prospective role of being a cookie cutter in the Hierarchy. Later, I am with my older brother Dennis (who still lives in America and last seen in real life in 1994). I tell him about the Hierarchy and about Alex. I say that Alex has “limitless diamonds” and owns whatever he wants. The moon represents the circadian rhythms factor of dreaming (as night is typically associated with the dream self while daylight and the sun represent the dynamics of conscious self identity). Its being a cookie cutter signifies the nature of lucid dreaming under conscious self identity creation. The fact that there are apparently “no cookie cutters” in the Hierarchy translates as RAS being of a biological factor and that one should not have full conscious control of circadian rhythms cycles, which could damage the physical body. This does not limit or suspend any potential for apex lucidity of course, which mostly occurs in the morning anyway within my last dream. The cookie cutter’s position on the shelf is more about the dynamic of this part of the sleeping and dreaming cycle, the moon’s crescent form signifying my percentage of unconscious awareness and percentage of vividness of the dream state (for example, a full moon would indicate full awareness while in the dream state). Liminal space dividers in the dream state are symbolized in real time by walls, fences, or high shelves. My act of climbing the shelf is symbolic of my dream self (subliminally) seeking more understanding of RAS and the preconscious. My comment to Dennis about the diamonds relates that the preconscious and RAS are of the main biological power behind sleeping and waking transitions. Being within a large diamond is one of the Mastership meditations that in part represents clarity of thought even when unconscious (though again, I do not have viable lucidity in this dream). This dream is mainly the result of a new variant of affirmation-based dream preparation. Instead of using “after” and doing the count after a particular affirmation, I have changed this to “anytime after” for a number of reasons. For example, “anytime after” is far more powerful than “after”, as “after” would otherwise denote “immediately after” or “soon after” while “anytime after” would be far more likely to integrate into the continuity of a later dream, either literally or symbolically depending on the desired outcome.
Night of July 10, 2017. Monday. I am sitting in the darkness of a large unfamiliar rectangular room, never rendered in any previous dream, though my dream self “recognizes” and accepts it as our present home (as is usually the case). There is seemingly no furniture in the room other than the chair I am sitting in and the table that my desktop computer is on. Along the wall I am facing while at my computer are four equidistant doorways with apparent access to most of our house. (I have never been in such a layout in real life and its unusual nature does not trigger any thoughts of it being wrong. The layout is similar to another recent dream and is therefore a carryover, though in the previous dream, of July 2nd, my location in seeing the four adjacent rooms is as if from a featureless hall, and unlike with this dream, there was no awareness of the opposite side of my location.) As I sit at my computer in the dark room, I contemplate briefly checking Facebook. However, instead of using the bookmark, I start to type out the entire URL. I firstly type out characters that are incorrect (a common dream event as critical thinking is not viable in the dream state), but I eventually “succeed” in typing the MySpace URL, not at all considering that this is not what I had originally intended. Curiously, the incorrectly spelled previous links bring me to webpages that seem like partial pieces of the actual site. This ridiculous impossibility does not register to my dream self as being an erroneous but intriguing unique concept and I always find such distortions hilarious after waking. (On a side note, I have never held an interest in MySpace and have not even seen the site in many years, though this is more a subliminal awareness associated with my space in the bed.) Something shifts within my consciousness and level of awareness; instinctual dream control; that is, a subtle realization that I am creating my world, but without the understanding that I am dreaming. After this, my dream becomes a less common type primarily based on tactile factors. (This subtle realization that I am making my dream without remembering what a dream is is very common and occurs with a number of other dream types and has since earliest memory.) I deliberately try to force the setting into being haunted, including trying to force a fabricated history of previous hauntings to initialize this (a lifelong recurring event in the non-lucid dream state, probably an influence by my enjoyment of haunted house movies) though my willful effort does not initiate for a few minutes. Finally, I feel my fictional physical body moving from a vertical position to a horizontal position (with no falling jolt) as unseen implied ghosts (possibly that of two or three dogs) are dragging me across the floor. There is a brief “blind spot” regarding the change, like a subtle skip in my dream’s continuity. I feel a tightening around my waist as I am being dragged feet-first on my left side to the other side of the room, but it is not unpleasant or nightmarish (and there is also the ambiguous feeling of being pushed as such at the same time). (In the back of my mind, I am aware that I alone am causing this.) I still call out for help, being aware that Zsuzsanna may be somewhere in the house. I am not clear on whether or not there is a door on the opposite side of the room, though which I vaguely consider would be the entry into this house rather than another room. My focus on this possibility remains ambiguous as I consider Zsuzsanna being “outside” this structure as on another level of existence, not quite bilocation, but probably subliminal realization that she is next to me in reality. I wake up kicking and rolling about and softly speaking gibberish (rather than whining or moaning as with most tactile hypnopompia), but this does not wake Zsuzsanna. This dream type is so different from other dream types that it is like a different type of unconscious experience. Most such dreams have far less imagery (sometimes none at all, being mostly augmented touch and sense of weight and momentum) regardless of the three-dimensional awareness of the setting. Most such dreams seem to be specifically caused by the enhanced awareness of the weight of a blanket or the body’s sleeping position (and in this case, I went from my original fictional dream body’s upright position into my actual sleeping position, though changing it in hypnopompia), yet for some reason, my dream self takes on the role normally reserved for the preconscious with an unusual pretense that there are “ghosts” present, being aware it is my own doing on a lesser level, typically likely caused by simply wanting to change my sleeping position within sleep (which has been verified with a number of past examples). It is highly unlikely that this type of dream has any additional meaning or purpose. Whereas many non-lucid dreams are based on the symbolism incidentally built from the subliminal expectation of the waking transition, this type seems solely based on ongoing environmental factors. There is a very big difference, which is likely why the mood, tone, and level of awareness is completely different.
Morning of June 12, 2017. Monday. I become aware that I am lying on a snow-covered sidewalk, possibly in La Crosse (where I have not been in real life since February of 1994). I “remember” that I had been with a group of pirates. Presently, I and at least three others are probably in need of assistance. We all are going to be taking at least two headache tablets (even though I do not have a headache). They are all on the ground, near parts of the snow-covered sidewalk. I also see a lot of powder, the appearance of which reminds me of powdered drain cleaner. Within the mostly white powder are slightly larger red, blue, and green grains. I take only two pills and, even though the others have probably taken four, decide to stop there. I also ingest just a small amount of the powder. Still, I wonder if I had taken too much. (I do not use any kind of drugs or medication in reality.) I feel an unusual blissful sensation as well as a slight vivifying of my dream. Later, I decide to get up. The other pirates do not follow me at this time. I find my way onto a porch that seems loosely modeled after the King Street mansion’s front porch. I lie on the wooden floor for a short time. Soon, the leader of the pirates opens the front door and steps out onto his porch to see me lying there on my back. Even though I am a part of his group, he seems annoyed to see me and is going to shoot me. He takes out a flintlock rifle and aims at me. I do not really feel like being shot but I do not attempt to escape or even move. Suddenly, another pirate appears behind him on the porch (having just come in from outside) and shoots him in the back of the neck. This other pirate is Charlie Pace (a “Lost” television series character played by Dominic Monaghan). I am grateful and thank him. The rest of the pirates that had been lying on the snow-covered sidewalk enter the porch from outside and look down at the body, seemingly unsure of who the new leader will be. This is a typical porch dream of the type I have had all my life. Porches symbolize the waking transition of liminal space and often involve the personified preconscious (here, the pirate leader). The purpose of the preconscious is to initiate waking (or finalize the consciousness shift towards waking), sometimes by “killing” or annoying the fictional dream self (though sometimes linking “return flight” symbolism). Although it is rare to be “killed” in my dreams in a discernible manner, my emergent consciousness was projected as the pirate version of Charlie Pace (though sometimes my emergent consciousness is like an enemy as well depending on the type of waking symbolism that is rendered). (I have not seen an episode of “Lost” in a long time.) There was no direct hypnopompic surge (which probably would have happened had I been “shot”). It was a soft awakening. The very common dream sign of lying down having been “asleep” is present (and I am lying down in the last scene as well), which replaces the usual water induction (although technically snow is frozen water).
Updated 12-12-2022 at 04:23 PM by 1390
Morning of May 24, 2017. Wednesday. Dream #: 18,419-01. Reading time: 1 min 19 sec. Readability score: 64. I am in an unknown room (although there is an association, conscious afterthought only, that I am in the west area of the kitchen of our present home). There is an indistinct awareness; a possible backstory; of watching what may be a YouTube video made by people with a typical lack of reasonable intelligence. I am only aware of it at times. Its overall content remains uncertain. I am holding commercially bottled water. It is a 1.5-liter plastic bottle with a discernible label. It is probably about three-quarters full. An unknown dark-haired girl approaches me from the east side of the kitchen, possibly from my sons’ room. She wants to know what I have and what the name of it is. I see that the name of the bottled water product is “Watership Down.” I tell her this as I show it to her. I hand it to her, and she takes it, seeming formally appreciative as she walks away, possibly back to my sons’ room. My dream self remains passive and servile. My dream segment stems from the concept of dream state water induction and reinduction, where water usually vivifies the dream state (including by being splashed by it), based on the Naiad process, sometimes ritualistically, at the beginning of many sleep cycles. (The video association was probably from audio from a television that was on in reality.) Here, it is analogous to natural melatonin. I do not need more, as I do not need to remain in the sleep cycle. Thus, the preconscious avatar, no longer in service as a Naiad, takes my water away. What reveals that this (in addition to what I already know) is the case? First of all, rabbits often live underground, an association with being asleep, and the subconscious self (”below,” “under,” “underground”) not being the conscious self. Additionally, the lyrics from “Watership Down” begin with “Is it a kind of a dream?” (Zsuzsanna sang this to me on a cassette she made before we met.)
Night of April 28, 2017. Friday. I am in a distorted liminal state of semi-lucidity, yet it is not active enough to have viable memory, including historical knowledge, though I am mostly aware of my present life status and conscious self identity. There is a couch in a fictionally-placed location that faces the foot of our bed (west), though this is more like typical bilocation as it seems to be a different house partially integrated into ours (and with the common dream perception of being in two places at once). Abraham Lincoln is sleeping on the couch in the semidarkness a few hours before dawn, his head to the north. He is dressed in a suit and mostly on his back but partly on his right side. I find myself picking up a teddy bear and feel that I should give it to him, but I do not want to wake him. I seem to recall that he always sleeps with a teddy bear (though this is fallacy as teddy bears did not exist in Lincoln’s time). He remains sleeping. I have no awareness that he had been a president or that he is deceased though I also do not see him as an imposer. Of the fifty solid years I have closely studied dreams, Abraham Lincoln has only directly appeared in a few of them, always as the (potential) emergent consciousness precursor symbol but never as the actual emergent consciousness factor. This may be because I (subliminally) do not believe my conscious self identity could “fill his shoes” so to speak. In one of my last Lincoln dreams in 2014, the personified preconscious, as a young female, kept saying “Lincoln lied about that”, lastly saying “Lincoln smiled…” and again followed by “Lincoln lied about that” (which may or may not be a dream sign as a play on lying down). Basically, this is a second-level “threshold” type due to the fact that the “doorway” was not literal but still directly implied as being between where my wife Zsuzsanna and I were sleeping (in reality) and the other room (our kitchen in real life but somewhat featureless and undefined in my dream). It is possible that the emergent consciousness precursor did not activate simply because I was near the beginning of the sleep cycle rather than coming out of it.
Morning of April 26, 2017. Wednesday. There were previous scenes at a different level of consciousness, but I more vividly find myself walking in an unfamiliar area. It seems as if it might be some sort of low-set bridge. I am not focused on where I am going. It may be to the shopping mall. There are no buildings around. There is a large expanse of water to my left. It is daylight out though I am not sure of the implied time. It may be morning. Eventually, I notice one other person about half-a-block’s distance ahead of me. Getting closer, I see that it is my wife Zsuzsanna’s sister Judy. She seems wary at first, until she realizes who I am, but keeps walking. My attention falls on the water. There are a large number of birds that are mostly all the same, mostly a mix of dark gray, black, white, and blue. Some of them are on the surface of the water, somewhat duck-like (though I am not sure what kind of a bird they are). About an equal number of birds, I can see under the water, their heads upward just to the underside of the surface. This imagery continues as I walk at least the equivalent of two city blocks. I find it curious, even somewhat peculiar, but it is a beautiful scene. The birds under the water do not move that much but may be feeding on the same food source that the birds above the water are looking for or eating. Thus, there is a vague sense of ambiguity. This is a curious liminal space transition (especially as I seem to be walking on some sort of bridge) that mixes water induction (with subliminal awareness of being asleep) and the anticipatory (yet also subliminal) consciousness shift symbol (the birds). I find it interesting how nearly identical imagery seems to be rendered in each area of the water as I walk along.
Night of April 14, 2017. Friday. There is a quickly perceived backstory of two unknown men. There is an awareness of each man being dressed somewhat as Zorro (though this is not fully perceived as such in my dream). It does seem that a couple masks are quickly removed prior to the last part. One man is at a table in a restaurant, though in semidarkness. I do not seem directly involved. The two men look nothing alike. One is much slimmer and taller. The slimmer man enters the restaurant and stands near the table. As the slimmer man looks down with his face very close to the one sitting at the table, he exclaims, “What the h— is this?” with both puzzlement and mild anger. Both men have identical sets of symmetrical and parallel scratches on their face (as if the marks were made on purpose), some coming out diagonally (and upward) from near each eye, some mostly horizontal on the cheeks, some down around near their mouth. They look at each other curiously, each perhaps thinking one is impersonating the other. The marks mostly look like cat scratches, and about half are still red. This is some sort of odd coalescence factor, probably the preconscious and the emergent consciousness personified in an oddly projected or secondary way. (I did get the brief impression that I was looking at myself even though neither man looked anything like me.) (There is possibly influence from Balthazar in “The Scorpion King”, a 2002 movie, though the appearance is very different.)
Morning of April 7, 2017. Friday. My family and I as we are now are watching television. At one point, it seems we are watching the movie “Firestarter” (1984). Over time, it seems that there are some very strange changes in the movie as I remember it and I become more and more annoyed. In a scene where Andy is talking to his daughter Charlie, he is now wearing a fireproof suit (where in the original scene he was in his normal informal clothes). I talk about how they must have covered up the image of the actor with some sort of CGI. I find the change ridiculous. (His face cannot even be seen as it is covered with some sort of material.) Other scenes have been changed. At times, Lego people appear in some of the scenes instead of human actors. Another scene has a stuffed dog that moves about like a real one. The nature of the movie becomes more and more surreal. At one point, I am sitting on a bed, seemingly somehow inside the movie (but only for a short time) and a stuffed dog and a stuffed rabbit are present (the stuffed rabbit in the bed and the stuffed dog walking about near the bed). I eventually decide that the television has become corrupt and needs to be rebooted like a computer so that television shows and movie scenes will be as they should be. I am in front of the television. Our youngest son is also present. I mention how I have to reboot the television. I look on the bottom right of it but I am not sure what to do. On the bottom left, but mostly arranged vertically, is a set of about seven buttons. They are of different shapes, a couple horizontally rectangular and a couple vertically rectangular while others are square. I see that one of the buttons (the bottommost one) reads “SET”. I assume that this might mean “reset” so I press it and the television screen goes black and a sequence of dominoes (overhead view) appears on the screen. Our youngest son tells me that those buttons are only for the domino game.
Morning of March 22, 2017. Wednesday. This is a very long and vivid dream with a lot of different events. The location is not known, but it is implied to take place in our home in most scenes and there are rooms from various houses we have lived. I become aware of what I first think is a snake that is hanging down from a hanging planter. Soon, it flawlessly transforms into a long leaf. I start talking to my family about what I had seen. I want to film it but for some reason the camera is not available, which annoys me. Over time, this creature changes into many other things, based on some sort of learning curve related to being in the same place more than once. I do not refer to it as “extraterrestrial” until the last segment, although I am not sure if it really is from another planet. I handle this creature, which in its original form, is some sort of worm. At times, it is more like a miniature egg though is very malleable; somewhat like clay, somewhat like a leech. I place it on notebook paper and it transforms into a pencil. (This same scene occurs at least three times, as I repeat my experiments to see what it does.) In some cases, it merely changes color when I place it on a surface, though its color always perfectly matches the surface color. It does not really seem to try to escape when I hold it. There is a scene where I drink a cup of water or other liquid at a table. My throat feels a bit strange, as if something is stuck in it, and I look down into the cup and see that the liquid is filled with tiny pale worms swimming about in the water, all upward and out from the center. A young black male tells me that what I am drinking came from McDonald’s. He tells me how he did not want to be a part of it, but that they put these creatures in some drinks and normal earthworms in others as some sort of test. The several worms I had swallowed become one large one after I remove them from my throat. I am not concerned in any way. It looks just like the original worm. I place it on a moped seat (which for some reason is indoors, the room seeming like my den on Stadcor Street, the moped facing the doorway though leaning against the wall). The worm oddly transforms into an unusual human-like girl (who remains sitting on the moped) but hairless and with bright pink skin and slight feline characteristics. The other male looks on and scowls. “Oh no, I’m having none of this,” he says. Most of the rest of my dream involves more experiments where it goes through a number of intriguing and even beautiful multicolored changes. I also place it on a pillow in one of the final scenes as a dream-sign-based waking precursor, with non-lucid dream control. This dream is all about transformation and adapting to the dream state as the worm does not change anything else; only itself, as an amazing analogy to one type of dream state alchemy, though the worm exhibited far more of a natural and automatic control than I ever had in non-lucid dreams (although I have transformed into different things in the past, including both animals and furniture as well as utilizing invisibility, phasing through walls and roofs of cars, and flying since early childhood). Of course, there is a big difference between adapting to a dream or dream environment and fully controlling a dream.
Morning of January 16, 2017. Monday. There is some sort of conspiracy related to a hospital serving as an “airport” for certain flights, this being unknown to the passengers. Apparently, they experiment on the passengers or harvest their organs. There is a scene where I seem to be on an airplane, though I also see an unrealistic degree of additional details outside the airplane. The airplane lands on a boulevard near the hospital (in an unknown location), seemingly without any traffic mishaps. It even taxis into a special hangar inside the hospital. I somehow phase through the airplane even though I am aware that everyone else on it has gone into some sort of suspended animation (obvious autosymbolism for being asleep and dreaming). I am in the hangar and see several other people who work at the hospital approaching the airplane. They seem happy that a lot of passengers are in it. They do not even notice me at first and by the time they do, I am almost out into the hall. They start to chase me but I close the door and lock it behind me, the act of which immediately makes my dream much more vivid. (This is called “doorway reinduction”, as doors are usually autosymbolic of the implied exit point of a dream, though I have used this knowledge all my life to sustain and reinduce my dream state awareness.) The lock is a rectangular part that extends only a short way out from the face of the doorknob (by almost its full diameter), which I rotate to the left as I close the door (dream state reinduction orientation as I sleep on my left side). They cannot continue to follow me. Later, I notice unfamiliar patients in beds in the halls. Some of them join me as I then decide to leave the hospital rather than create any confrontations. I see doctors talking in the hall. I see at least one police officer, but I am not sure if he is corrupt and working with the hospital. Rather than going down one hall where we could get caught, I take one on the left of two choices, where there are no people who would question us or follow us. It seems to be a very simple evasion. We all get to the end of the hall and are able to escape. This is a very basic “return flight” type dream with the same overall patterns as always; the subliminal anticipation of the waking shift (which sometimes includes a falling sensation and which creates precursors that include a number of different flight symbols, though which also include elevators and staircases), the liminal space of the hall, liminal awareness of being asleep (a bed as a dream state indicator), and a doorway at the end of the hall to exit my dream though after having sustained its length a little bit by locking the first door. There is no direct preconscious factor here though it is a rather sustained unusual dream just for being based on vestibular system correlation. The organ harvesting was related to a movie we saw recently (“Inhale” from 2010). Still, it seems to imply that the collective unconscious is “experimenting” on the collective conscious, the logic being that the sleeping passengers would represent conscious selves sleeping and the hospital staff being minds active within the dream state, though I suppose it could also just be a simple metaphor for lucidity and how I am often lucid in dreams while many others are not (though I myself am not viably lucid at any point in this dream other than having a degree of the typical liminal dream control, that is, control of the dream state without in-dream awareness that I am dreaming, though my second attempt to reinduce and sustain my dream instead results in slowly waking by way of doorway waking autosymbolism, which has happened in childhood even when choosing the left door).
Morning of December 25, 2016. Sunday. I seem to be in a very large unfamiliar room with a high ceiling that seems to be in a large commercial building. However, it is meant to be the inside of a helicopter (though the fact it looks nothing like the inside of a helicopter in any way does not trigger any level of doubt or any type of realization). I am apparently flying in this “helicopter” as a passenger. There are two unfamiliar male pilots (in black pants and white shirts) who mostly remain seated on the opposite side of the room from me. They face toward a wall looking at a number of monitors. At times, they seem to be typing flight instructions on keyboards as they look at the monitors. There is also some communication now and then with air traffic controllers or at least some people on the ground. The “helicopter” is supposed to be landing somewhere soon, but it is not safe to land anywhere in the area due to a mist that remains at least six feet above the ground and is covering unseen large rocks everywhere in the landscape. Some parts of some rocks protrude upward from the mist. It seems to be part of a canyon or possibly a series of canyons, all with mist and rocks. This puzzles me somewhat but nothing about the situation seems wrong or threatening to me. One of the pilots, while standing near the desk-like extension from the wall, seems to relate to the other that he could land without hitting a rock though no attempts at landing occur, at least any of which I become directly aware. There is a sense of movement at one point where the room seems to slowly turn in a circle but there is no disorientation or perceived danger on my part. I seem to be lying on my left side at one point though not directly aware of being on a bed. I start to think about the “helicopter” landing on the flat ground between large jagged rocks. I do not feel concerned about anything. The pilots do not address me at any point. This dream’s autosymbolic meaning is based on the biological nature of the dream state itself and obviously has nothing to do with waking life, especially as the autosymbolism’s phrasing in hypnopompic disclosure is known. A helicopter (which has been a recurring emergent consciousness factor in my dreams since early childhood), as with vehicles in general, is an autosymbolic extension of my physical body in REM sleep, though with a more defined subliminal discernment of the vestibular system ambiguity that occurs naturally in unconsciousness, than with similar autosymbolic extensions such as a motorcycle. This dream’s autosymbolism was based on a typical unconscious phrasing, “Although I am now sleeping, I am becoming more aware of my real environment and of my physical body, which is operating smoothly”. The jagged rocks are autosymbolic of a vague anticipation of a waking start (hypnopompic kick or other involuntary muscle event), though of which does not occur, and the mist of course is autosymbolism for the dream state itself. This dream has a curious ambiguity of taking the subliminal awareness of being in our bedroom and sustaining it with the typical return flight waking symbolism, a type of RAS mediation which has occurred in at least one dream per regular sleeping period for over fifty years. As I am already in the more defined liminal space of conscious self recognition in passive waking transition, there is no dominant RAS modulation and the pilots of course are RAS personification and the emergence of thinking skills, which typically do not exist in the dream state.
Morning of November 17, 2016. Thursday. I am wandering around in La Crosse as I have the vague realization that I am tired and should probably go home. My dream self seems about twenty years of age. I fly to the back of a building, to the first-floor’s extended roof of the building which has at least two storeys. This feature provides access to two apartments on the higher floor. (The feature is similar to the Rose Street building I lived in as a young child, except it only had one hallway door to the first-floor roof. The location itself seems more like the area where Dennis lived years ago which also had only one door to the first floor roof.) From the outside, I have a false memory that my apartment is to the left and the one on the right is where my brother Dennis lives. He appears as he did in the 1970s. The setting is very distorted. Even though I remember living and sleeping in the apartment, it is far too small for a human being to either go through the doorway or actually live inside the building. The height of the living area is no more than two feet. This puzzles me but neither triggers any realization that the situation is impossible nor results in stronger emotions. I consider that the building is mostly made of a stack of bricks that shift a bit at times, which somehow makes the apartments smaller or larger at different times. There is a conversation between Dennis and our (fictitious) landlady, which eventually relates to something about feeding homeless people in the area. I cannot get into my apartment so I decide to sleep on the roof while thinking of how the homeless people will be fed as it seems like a worthwhile task. Dennis has some carrots, lettuce, and potatoes to start a stew or soup. Eventually, just as I begin to wake, there are vague thoughts about geese flying over the building and returning to the area. Wandering around feeling tired is a dream state indicator created by subliminal awareness of being asleep as well as having been tired in reality prior to my dream. This is additionally evidenced by wanting to sleep on the roof, which is a liminal space divider related to depth of sleep and how much of the conscious self identity is present. It is also why my dream’s setting is rendered as too small to access. The geese returning to the area is typical vestibular system correlation, autosymbolism for waking process thoughts in “returning” (waking back into) the physical body while leaving the illusory dream body. There are also mild thoughts of hunger. The “feeding” reference is to me, as “homeless” is based on liminal awareness of not being awake in the physical body.
Updated 06-13-2018 at 07:59 PM by 1390
Morning of November 12, 2016. Saturday. I find myself in what seems to be our old apartment on Gellibrand Street in Clayfield, yet which also has the feeling of the northeast bedroom of the Loomis Street house (yet another new composite I have never experienced before). The Loomis Street living room is mixed into the Gellibrand Street hall. However, even though it looks more like the Gellibrand Street apartment I feel younger and as if it is mainly the small Loomis Street bedroom. At one point, I hear an unknown male talking outside my door. Eventually, it seems he is mocking me, yet somehow without being directly sarcastic in his vocal tone. I am annoyed and go out to the front yard but do not yet see him. I notice that instead of the front steps there is a round boulder to have to walk up onto, which is difficult. The unknown male is now standing at the open hall entrance. He reminds me vaguely of Don K (who I had not seen since around 1982) and seems about twenty-five years old. He makes a couple comments about my difficulty in walking up and over the bolder and I feel a bit annoyed as my legs do not seem to work correctly. He mocks me with a few more comments, a couple relating to phrases my mother used to use (such as “my old bones” and “this nutty old world”). I agree with a couple comments he makes relating to my apparently lame legs. Still, I become more annoyed by his presence. He makes comments about details in my dream journals that I had written way back when I was only eight or nine years old (the original phrasing and writing style). I am surprised he knows all this. I get the impression he had somehow been reading my dream journals way back to 1966. I wonder if he stole any of them or any of the pages. Eventually, I punch him out. He ends up lying on his side in an unknown area, as the setting now transforms into an unfamiliar location. When he moves, I decide to chop him up so that he cannot be an annoyance anymore. Another male appears (likely the emergent consciousness personification as it seems more passive and “closer” than a personified basic conscious self identity) and we seem to be working in a mission together. There is an advanced computer that speaks as I am trying to work out where to send the body parts. I give the computer vocal instructions and it answers me in a loud clear voice. I give it various longitude and latitude directions though at first, what I say is distorted and meaningless. The computer keeps correcting what I say so I can repeat certain details. “Thirty-six degrees latitude north,” I eventually say. “One hundred fifteen degrees latitude west…” “You mean longitude,” says the computer loudly. I agree with all the corrections the computer makes, but I have no idea where I am sending the body parts as it feels I am just saying random values. I get the impression that a team will come in, take them away, and place them wherever. “The Deuce-Berry Hoover Dam,” announces the computer. I am somewhat surprised and am not certain it is a good idea to put the remains there (as I consider the remains sitting atop the wall near a spillway, right out in the open), but I do not say anything. The other male looks on passively as I visualize the espionage team getting ready. A dam is a potential waking prompt as water symbolizes sleep and a dam stops water from flowing; deuce is sometimes a term for the preconscious (secondary to a more defined emergent consciousness in the final scene of a dream), berry being a play on “bury” and “Hoover” also being associated with vacuum cleaners (both a mortality symbol and dreaming conduit and waking transition symbol that has been recurring more over the last ten years); the talking computer is the personified whole conscious self (not that common a feature as here) due to only the whole conscious self having viable thinking skills.
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