nightmare

Crazy murder mystery thing where S goes insane and starts threatening me with a butcher knife and holding me down and drawing it across my face so that it almost cuts me.. it did not feel pleasant.

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C and I are driving through a neighborhood filled with bright red pretty houses and somehow I end up stuck in one at the edge of the neighborhood. There's some kind of demon ethereal being that lives there and it traps me and commands that the only thing I will have to eat is it. Like, I can only eat raw peices of "human" flesh for the rest of my life. I end up sticking a human steak in the microwave and hoping that this doesn't break the rules because I really don't want to eat it raw. There are a bunch of scary scenes that flash, including one where I'm holding an eyeball by the optical nerve and flipping it around, contemplating eating it, trying to convince myself that this is all okay...

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Ugh.. hate this crap D:

Lucidity and points at terrible cause.. awful nightmare spurred by stupid show I watched last night involving a dead baby :<

-My daughter has some kind of problem and somehow we decide the best course of action is to euthanize her ourselves, painlessly of course. For some reason we're going through this process on the roof of some unknown public building here in town in the middle of a bright, hot day. As the process goes on, my daughter just keeps playing around like nothing is going on, since it hasn't taken full effect yet. This is just all way too much for me and I freak the hell out. The sheer amount of awfulness springs my lucidity and I channel it all towards getting the hell out of there. I immediately run and jump wayyy up into the air and fly away in a straight line as fast as I can. Scenery speeds by in a blur and my recall ends.

Had another dream about the nasty parasites from my last entry..

This time I'm getting out of bed (maybe a false awakening?) and notice my big toes feel funny, especially the left one. I look down and it is transforming into one of the parasites! I'm instantly freaked out of course. There are little legs coming off the sides and the end has a head protruding from it. As I walk into the living room each step brings pain from that toe and a tingly sensation from the other one. I sit down at the computer to look up what to do about it and as I glance again at my toe I notice my walking has crushed the head of the bug and its blood is pooling beneath my skin creating a big purple bubble of disgustingness. I'm almost relieved that it could possibly be dead, but horrified that there's a large dead bug INSIDE my freaking flesh, oozing its goop out everywhere. My other toe starts to have twinging pains in it and I think the second bug is growing in there.

Bleeehhhhh so disgusting..

Luckily I went on to have some DEILDs filled with adult fun. Definitely helped de-stress me! If I'd woken directly up from the parasite dream I'd probably be having a shitty day.. lol

- Eating chocolates with C in the bedroom (Cadbury eggs, yum!) when I look down at a half-eaten one and notice it has this disgusting thing in it:



These are parasites that normally get inside fish and eat, then take the place of, their tongues. They then proceed to steal all of the fish's food as it eats it. So, I freak out majorly and cry etc. I end up saying to C's brother that I'm just gonna have to wait 'til a lump forms in my tongue, then go get it taken out.

- Helping a young teen girl with long, straight blonde hair get out of an abusive family situation; dragging her around town trying to find a safe place, feeling like we're being hunted/followed; go to my old house in town where there are other people living now, take her in and lock us in a room; feels like we're safe, but the owners of the house come home I guess and we have to leave. Later on, girl is gone and I'm frantically searching for her and some other people we were with for a second (Lu, Z & C I think). They'd been parked along the road, waiting for me. It's night and I can't find them. It seems like they had to drive off for some reason, like the bad people came or whatever. I keep looking in dark vehicles, hoping they're hiding in one. Most of them are empty at first, then I start finding scary dark shadow people that I don't know. I get really freaked out and become sort of lucid. I just know that if I fly to the moon I can get out of this reality somehow. So I take off and zoom as fast as I can towards the moon. The going is a little slow due to fear. I top a hill covered in buildings and find myself looking at a big lake with hills far across on the other side. The moon isn't reflected in the water, but its light shines off the surface all over. I'm still trying to get to the moon but I start sinking towards the deep dark water. This scares me, but I'm so tired of being scared that I just say "fuck it" and let myself follow the curve of the dream. This decision actually raises my lucidity to normal levels. I end up deep down in some flooded underwater facility. Alarms and lights are going off and some of the crew is still trying to get things to work. It feels very space-like and reminds me of "The Abyss" except everything is completely flooded and we're all swimming around inside. Things go even more wrong and I want to get out of the situation even more. Suddenly C is with me, helping me calm down and guiding me to the "edge". I feel like the dream has an edge and when I pop out of it I'll wake up. We reach a weird corner that seems superimposed over everything else and we start to push against it, side by side with arms locked together. It's difficult, but I draw strength from C and we both persevere. Slowly the stuff starts to bend outward and our heads start to go through. C starts yelling like there's a really weird sensation, then I notice it. My head feels HOT and very tingly and I "see" pink and purple sparkles on the other side, a little like the static on an old, inactive TV. I can see a cross-section of my own head where it has entered the other side and it is much darker purple than what's around it. I get scared because it feels like there is intense pressure on my head, but I remain determined, let go of C's arm, and dive through the rest of the way. I feel almost like a baby falling out of a mother with the last push, but I also feel like I'm ENTERING a womb-like space. Once totally across, I assume the fetal position. Almost immediately I sit up in bed and all seems normal. My bed is in a different position now, but I don't notice. I decide to RC anyway and surprisingly to me I'm lucid! I wonder what to do, not caring about tasks, and decide to have some adult fun. I stand up and walk out of my room calling for D. I have a short moment of doubt about whether or not he will appear, but I dismiss it. I turn the corner into a small dining room that normally doesn't exist, and there he is, sitting and eating at the table wearing nothing but white boxers with red hearts on them. I interact with him verbally (no recall) and he gets up to come into the other room with me. His form seems weirdly insubstantial though, so I just walk away by myself. I encounter some people already having sex in my bedroom, so I decide to just watch. The guy is facing me while the girl is not and he keeps noticing me and being weirded out. I mutter some things like, "I'm not here, you don't see me," and wave my hands over my face and he stops paying attention. I end up getting involved then waking up.