lucid

Note: Still no luck with my WILD attempts. I am not sure why that is happening so rarely now when it used to be so common. I had one primary goal for this night, and that was to track down Asuka and bring her home. Q found a fake Asuka in MoSh's inner world, so the only conclusion, or most likely conclusion, is she was kidnapped. Other than that there is my usual list of goals…

I was lying on the living room couch. My mother woke me up. She said I had slept through half the movie. She suggested I go to bed if I was that tired. I told her I didn't feel tired. She said if I wasn't tired, I wouldn't have slept through so much of the movie. I thought a minute and realized I couldn't even remember what movie we had been watching… ok… she must be right. I must be tired, even if I didn't feel it… or maybe the nap had been all I needed. I got up from the couch and went into my bedroom. Something didn't look right there… there was a desk with a desktop computer on the far side of the room. I thought there shouldn't have even been room for that desk… I did a reality check… and found I was dreaming!

Now fully lucid, I focused on remembering my goals. Asuka! Yes, I had to help MoSh get Asuka back. I used my bedroom door as a portal for a change of pace, and I opened it and walked through into MoSh's inner world. I turned around just in time to see the doorway behind me fold up on itself until it became too tiny to see… and it was gone.

I looked around for MoSh. I saw I was standing in the living room of his house. MoSh looked over at me. He said he had been wondering if I wasn't going to make it. I said I had, and now we had better get going. No time to lose in getting Asuka back. I was pretty sure I already knew where she was, but I figured I would let my tracking guide my portal anyhow… just on the off chance we were wrong about who had taken her. I focused on opening a portal and on finding Asuka. A portal opened, MoSh and I went through it…

On the other side of the portal we were in a strange place. It looked rather nice. There was a swimming pool there, and it was a beautiful pool. There were several women with perfect bodies lying out on lounges sunbathing and a few more in the pool. I briefly felt ashamed of my large belly and second chin before I reminded myself that it is a dream, and in dreams I have neither of those. There was a man standing on the patio surveying the scene, practically drooling over the women in the pool. He looked like a faker biker, dressed in leather, but somehow it looked like he was trying so hard to look cool that he really just wound up with an epic fail. I knew who that was, it was L. I also saw there was one woman sitting on a chair on the patio, she didn't look happy to be there. That was Asuka. I went over to Asuka. I hadn't even reached her before L spotted me and seemed pleased. He said there is always room for one more bathing beauty in his place… I saw in my reflection that I suddenly had on a string bikini that left little to the imagination. I was about to curse at L, but I got distracted admiring how nice my dream body looks compared to my waking body. L told me to help myself to a drink at the bar or dive into the pool, the water was always the perfect temperature. Wait a minute… I wasn't there for a pool party…

"Asuka," I said, "I have come to take you home."

"She is very happy here," L said, "Now go ahead and enjoy yourself. Don't worry about the others."

"I think Asuka can answer for herself," I said to L, I was a bit annoyed, "Asuka? Let's go home. MoSh is worried about you."

Asuka looked up at me with a rather blank look on her face. She stared at me for a few minutes before she finally answered. She said she didn't want to go back. She said she wouldn't force herself on MoSh any longer. I asked what she was talking about. She said she knew everything now. She MoSh doesn't want her back. She said he had willingly turned her over to L, not once, but twice. He had willingly given up to L in a contest where she was the prize, and then when he had the choice between her and the alternate Asuka, he had chosen the other one. She said he had been hoping she wouldn't survive the battle to get her flame back. He had been counting on her dying so he could have the better version of her. She said she understood why. She said he had tried to, but he had never been able to forgive her for lying to him. Right now this was the only place she belonged.

I noticed that the whole time Asuka was talking she basically showed no emotion. It was as if she was rehearsing a script. I had no doubt in mind that L had put those exact lines into her head. L said the fact MoSh had sent me to get Asuka and hadn't come to get her himself. Wait a minute… MoSh had been with me to come get Asuka… where was he? Had he woken up? This wasn't a good time to wake up… I looked around and headed back in the direction I had come from. I reached the place where I had entered through the portal. I looked around. I saw MoSh. He had wandered off in the other direction. Wtf? I went over to him and asked what he was doing. He looked over at me. He looked a bit puzzled. I asked if he was even lucid. He looked at me. He looked at his hands. He pointed at me with his pinky… and then announced I was real.

"No shit, Sherlock," I said, "Now let's go get Asuka." MoSh was wanting to know if Asuka was ok. I said she was fine apart from the lies L had been filling her head with… which he hadn't been there do dispute just now… MoSh followed me over to the pool, seeming much more alert and lucid. Asuka was still sitting in the same chair. L was watching me bring MoSh back. He didn't seem overly concerned about that. I wondered if he had a plan up his sleeve. I figured it didn't matter. Whatever his plan was, it wouldn't work. MoSh saw Asuka and went over to her and said he was there to take her home. She started repeating the rehearsed lines she had given me. MoSh interrupted her before she was done. He said none of that was true. After MoSh's protest, Asuka just continued with her lines. I told MoSh I was sure she was under the influence of mind control. I would have to break the control.

"Breaking the silence of the night, can't you hear me screaming?" I focused on the song Breaking the Silence by Queensrÿche, "I look for your face in the neon light, you never answer… I could make all the wrong seem right if you were by my side, I'd gather all the tears you cried and hide them deep underground!" The song played through. L's certainty that we wouldn't be able to do anything to get through to Asuka seemed to be wavering. The song had its effect on Asuka. Her eyes cleared, and she looked over at MoSh. She looked on the verge of tears. She looked at me and then at MoSh. She said everyone kept saying MoSh hated her now.

"That…" Asuka stammered, "That's not true, is it?"

"Come on, Asuka," MoSh said, "You know I love you!"

Asuka got up, looked a bit dizzy, and walked towards MoSh in an unsteady manner. She looked kind of drunk.

"Why don't you two just go home?" L said, "Asuka wants to be here with me. Although Raven, if you want to have a swim you are certainly welcome to stay…"

"I'd sooner swim in a sewer than in a pool with you," I said, "And if Asuka wants to stay with you, why does she look like she's about to puke?"

I used Master of Puppets on L. If he is so fond of mind control, let's do a little on him. "Master of puppets is pulling your strings, twisting your mind and smashing your dreams, blinded by me you can't see a thing, just call my name, I'll hear you scream! Master! Master!" I ordered L to release Asuka. He did. She came over to MoSh. L snapped out of the mind control, I hadn't meant for it to last very long. He got mad at MoSh and me for forcing him to do things against his will. He said no one forces him to do anything! He is his own man and…

"And there is an alien pulling your strings," MoSh said. He created a hologram of the alien in this picture. "It's a Reptilian, or a Draconian… and I saw one of them draining your energy.

L looked at the picture briefly, having been completely interrupted from his yelling at MoSh and me. He looked at the hologram, then at MoSh, at the hologram, at MoSh…

"Are you on drugs?" he asked MoSh, then he looked at me, "He's on drugs, isn't he?"

I didn't really have a chance to answer. MoSh was answering. "I saw it," MoSh said, "It was draining your energy. It is controlling your every move. Maybe that's why you're such an ass."

"You're making excuses for me being an ass?" L asked, sounding thoroughly confused, "Now there's a new one. Now why don't you just leave these two lovely ladies here with me, and go on your pathetic way?"

"I'm not staying with you," Asuka said, "Go back to your stupid DC bimbos," she looked at me, "They are all DCs, you know. Just illusions. He couldn't get the attentions of a real woman if he paid her…"

"And if I have to look at your face for one more second," I told L, "I think I'll vomit. So we'll all be going. Have fun with your DCs… which is like using blow-up dolls, right? So have fun with your blow-up dolls." I opened a portal to get us all back to MoSh's inner world. The three of us went through. On the other side of the portal, we were all in the yard in front of MoSh's house. I closed the portal before L could consider following us. MoSh had his arms around Asuka, who seemed happy to be there. I was going to ask if Asuka was ok. I didn't have a chance to say anything.

Note: No WILD again, which is pretty much becoming the norm. My first goal was to go and heal MoSh, and that was in my mind when I fell asleep. I am getting a lot better at the FA's, though. That is getting to be my most consistent form of lucid dreams lately! My memory wasn't great, had a couple of short dreams which are both in this entry.

*Darkness Within*
I got out of bed to go to the bathroom. I am getting into the habit, so I did a RC almost right away and found I was dreaming. I remembered my first goal of healing MoSh. I opened a portal and headed off to MoSh's inner world, now I was fully lucid.

I entered MoSh's inner world in a usual place. I was in the front yard of MoSh's house in his inner world. I looked around and spotted MoSh. He was standing in the yard, facing away from the house. The general area was bright and sunny, but the area right around MoSh was dead and dark… the grass right around MoSh was dead, it looked like he was standing in the middle of a cloud of smoke. I went over to MoSh. MoSh looked at me strangely. He looked weird. His eyes looked strange. There were black swirls in them, though he was smiling at me. It looked a bit creepy… I told MoSh I was there to do a healing spell on him. He said go ahead. I used the song Silver and Cold, pulled dark energy out of MoSh and into me. I was paying more attention this time to be sure I didn't try to absorb another entity with MoSh's dark energy. When the song was complete, I used Touch My Heart and replaced that dark energy with light energy. The cloud of gloom around MoSh seemed to disappear into nothing, and he looked normal again.

Well, MoSh looked mostly normal again… he looked worried. He said he was worried about Asuka, he thought the intruder might have infected her with dark energy. I followed MoSh into the house. Asuka was sitting in the living room watching something on television. MoSh seemed hesitant to look at the screen. There was a puppy playing on the television. It was cute. I told MoSh it was cute. He looked and agreed. He said he wanted to heal Asuka. Asuka smiled and said she was fine. MoSh wanted to be sure. So we did a healing spell on Asuka. I didn't sense any dark energy in her, so I just went straight to Touch My Heart. The room filled with golden energy and that golden energy flowed into Asuka. She looked very relaxed. I sat down on the couch beside her for a bit.

I was sitting there. Asuka had a remote control in her hand, and she was channel surfing. I wondered what she was looking for. She said she was looking for a movie to get into. I thought that was interesting... also that she had answered a question I had only thought... She finally settled on a channel. There were people on the screen talking to each other about dreams... something to do with traveling to other worlds in their dreams. Cool! Sounded like an interesting movie! Asuka got up, and went over to MoSh. They went over to the television and stepped into the screen. Woah... I'd forgotten about the idea of going into the movie... but that had been part of the plan. Ok, so now it was my turn. I saw MoSh and Asuka in the movie now. The other characters seemed mildly surprised to see them, but not overly alarmed. I went to push my way into the screen... and instead my head came into contact with a solid surface. The TV wasn't a gateway... it was a solid wall! Wtf? I tried to push my hands through the screen, but I was getting nowhere. It was frustrating. I tried a couple more times, getting frustrated even more, and then I woke.

*Stargates*
I was at school, or I think it was school. It looked more like a mall. A lot of stores, but I was thinking it was a school. I was there with Tigress. I walked down the main hall with her, looking at the different stores. I was thinking they were all there to sell school supplies. There was one that had a lot of games in it. Most likely for game design research. I went inside. There were computers and games and such, and in the back of the room… there was a stargate! Awesome! It looked so real. I went over to it and looked closer. Someone asked where I wanted to go. I said I wanted to go to… I didn't have time to finish saying that when it opened of its own accord. Something was coming through… a lot of somethings. Gou'ald were coming through. They were shooting at people as they ran for cover. Tigress looked around and then pulled me along. There were Gou'ald attacking random people. I wanted to stop them. I was trying to pull away from Tigress, but she seemed determined not to let go of me.

I went with Tigress out of the mall / school into a grassy field. No parking lot? Never mind, there was a space ship hovering in the field. I called to the people who were running away to follow us to the space ship. A lot of people started following us, some of them were ahead. A lot of the people either didn't hear or didn't understand or didn't believe, so they weren't following. They were heading off in random directions. I reached the ship. A couple of people helped me into the ship. I turned around to grab Tigress. I reached for her hand… and then she disappeared. What the hell? Where had she gone? Had the Gou'ald done something? I had to find her! More people were climbing into the ship, but I just wanted to go back and find Tigress. I jumped back out of the ship, some of the others protested and some said I was nuts, and I started looking through the crowds for her. She couldn't have just vanished! That was impossible, unless… I did a RC… and I found I was dreaming!

Yes! I used Battery on a bunch of Gou'ald… but I got too excited at finding this was a dream and I could do something about it that I woke up.

I was in bed. I was thinking about my dreaming goals. I wanted to find out where I had left the dark energy entity I had pulled out of S, it had escaped me and taken over MoSh, I took it out of MoSh and someone took it from me when I was being unable to control it again. My being in bed and thinking about dreams is getting to be a common occurrence. I rolled over and wondered if I might be dreaming. I sat up in bed and pinched my nose, doing a nose pinch RC. I could breathe just fine. I was definitely dreaming. I got out of bed, fully lucid.

I wondered how I could find out about what had happened. Well, I have gone to dream view some of MoSh's dreams, so I could do the same thing here. I could go to view my own dream. I left the room and went into the next room. I thought I could travel through time or I could use the idea of watching the dream on a computer. My laptop. I went to it, it was sitting on my couch, and I opened it up. The computer came to life. There was software already running. It looked like a usual browser, but there was a menu up on the screen. A very interesting looking web site. There were titles on the screen, that looked like the titles of dreams I have had. One of them was labeled "06/05/10 Demons Within." I clicked on that one. Instead of opening up a text window, however, it opened up a video screen. I clicked on the play button and suddenly I was in the middle of a 3D holographic representation of the dream. It looked like I was there, but this time viewing it from 3rd person instead of my usual first person position.

I was in the dream and I watched it as it progressed. I watched MoSh and myself go into S's inner world where we did healing spells on her. I watched myself drawing dark energy out of S, and this time I saw when the actual entity came out of S and went into me. I saw myself visibly having problems controlling the dark energy and entity I had just absorbed, and then I saw the thing pull out of me. I saw the thing go over to MoSh, and I saw myself turn towards MoSh and then realize I had not contained the dark energy, instead it had escaped. Ok… that was the first part… MoSh disappeared, then the dream changed. The hologram flickered off and then back on. Large words on the screen. It said that "06/05/10 MoSh's Demon" was the next dream to play back.

The hologram surrounded me again. I was now in the abandoned city where I found MoSh. MoSh was there, and he was beating up a Templar. He broke that Templar's neck. He went down a side alley. Another Templar approached MoSh. He tried to say something, but MoSh didn't give him a chance to. MoSh immediately started beating the shit out of the Templar. He grabbed a pipe and continued beating the Templar. I saw myself show up. MoSh ran the pipe through the Templar's back and was glaring at the me in the dream. MoSh looked like he was resisting something, he told the other me to get away, then I saw myself tell MoSh I was sorry I had let that thing into him and I would help him. I saw myself draw the dark energy out of MoSh. I again saw as the other me drew the dark entity into myself. I was once again having problems controlling that, but I immediately opened a portal and left.

I saw myself appear in a forest. I didn't know any more about where I was. The forest itself was non-descript. There was a man there with me. I looked at him closely. It was definitely not Walms. The man came over near me and waited a bit, watching me struggle with the entity inside me. I recognized him. It was L. He changed form into Walms, and then started talking to me. He was telling me to let go of the entity, to let it go and he would take care of it. He was saying I had just tried to absorb too much too fast, but it was safe to let it go now. I saw myself let go of the entity… it came out of me. Now L was not paying much attention to me. He was talking to the spectral entity. He asked what the fuck had just happened. I saw myself disappear, but the holo-movie continued.

L was mad at the entity. He said he had given her a simple task of getting into MoSh, hitching a ride back to MoSh's inner world, and bring Asuka back to him where she belongs. The entity was not pleased, either. She was getting mad at L , saying no one had said anything about a stupid bitch trying to actually absorb her… and after having too much energy drained, MoSh had resisted taking her back to her inner world… so it was L's fault. If he wanted to fuck around with dark energy, she would give him something to fuck around with. The entity attacked L, was apparently that pissed, blasted right through L before exiting the other side of him and disappearing through a black portal. L looked pretty drained by that encounter… and he disappeared, apparently waking up. So now the dream was over, and the holo-recording ended.

I was in front of my laptop again. I looked at the screen where it was back to the menu. Apparently I had given the entity back to L, but she wasn't in the mood to cooperate with L any longer. At least L hadn't gotten her back to try his dirty plan again… I was looking at the computer to see what other dreams I could examine when everything faded and I woke.