If you can get so that you successfully fly every time using a specific action or object, you'll grow more confident. When I was a kid I would always have to run as fast as I could and jump to fly and it always had a sort of kite/paper airplane effect in that if I didn't catch the right updraft I would fly for a few seconds and then come crashing down but eventually I got to where I could fly every time using that method and then eventually was accustomed enough to it that I could just take off superman style from a stand still and go roaring in to the upper atmosphere.
The purpose of using an object or a motion is that you have to trick your own logic. You obviously don't think its possible to fly, but in a dream your logic becomes fuzzy (like being high) so that its not that hard to convince yourself that maybe if I just had this baseball bat, it would help me fly...
Then once you accomplish that you can think about it a little more rationally and do the "its not that magic item, it was just me all along" routine.
edit: Also, it seems silly to quote the matrix, but that whole movie pretty much applies to lucid dreaming so remember morpheus; "Don't think you can, know you can"
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